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12boogaloo · 7 months ago

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Dad! John Dory AU

If you told a teenaged John Dory that he would become a stay at home family man one day, he would’ve laughed in your face and told you that you were insane. And if you told him that he was in therapy to deal with his childhood trauma, he would’ve been confused and probably a little angry that you dared insinuate his childhood was ‘traumatic’. He had a great childhood! He had a roof over his head, food to eat, and amazing little brothers to love, what more could he ask for? (As if that wasn’t the literal bare minimum.)

Thank the Muses for Hickory, honestly. Him and Dickory both are the reason he actually started talking to someone about what he was going through, especially after their oldest son was born. He never realized just how bad it was for him growing up, wanting to believe everything was normal and okay because if he thought it was, then it had to be, right? If he said everything was perfect, then it was perfect. …Right?

Spoiler alert: it wasn’t. Being forced from a young age to take care of his siblings, putting their needs and wants before his own, essentially being made into a ‘child-parent’ because his own parents weren’t around enough to support him was not okay. It was downright abusive behavior, according to his therapist and his husband. And while John doesn’t fully blame his grandmother for what happened to him, she was already older by the time he came along and wouldn’t have been able to handle five boys alone anyway so he would’ve helped her regardless, he most certainly blames their father. That bastard is the reason he didn’t get to have a childhood.

Forrest Timber was… an asshole, to put it mildly. Musically speaking, he was a genius. His voice was deep and raspy when he sang and he had a talent for guitar, something he seems to have passed on to Floyd. He had dark blue hair, similar to Branch’s, and light blue skin. His eyes were pale blue like John’s own, which he doesn’t know how to feel about, and he had a streak of purple at the front of his hair.

John doesn’t remember much else about Forrest, honestly. Only that he liked to yell and throw things when he got angry, which was pretty much anytime he was home. But their other father, their Papa Ash, he was sweet and kind and John loved him. He tried to protect him when Forrest would rage, comforted him and told him stories about the beautiful mountains he’d seen as a child when he’d been traveling with his birth family, and tried his best to take care of him. Grandma Rosiepuff adopted Ash after he turned up at the tree as a teenager and based on his features and the posh accent John remembers him having, he was some kind of Rock Troll. His skin was dark gray and his hair was neon green and very big and curly. John remembers it used to actually glow in the darkness of the closet he’d hide himself and John in when Forrest got drunk and wanted to hit something. (He’d usually either give up looking for them and leave to find something else to take his aggression out on or he’d punch a hole in the wall then drink until he passed out on the kitchen floor. That happened at least once a week until John Dory was about two, before Spruce came along and before Ash started finding ways to keep Forrest out of the house and away from them.)

John still remembers the day Ash brought him to their grandmas pod when he was three, a purple and blue egg in his hair. He still remembers the quiet, rushed conversation Ash had with Rosiepuff while John played in the living room pretending he couldn’t hear them. He remembers the tears in his Papa’s glowing pink eyes as he set Spruce’s egg in his arms and kissed his forehead before he said ‘goodbye’ and the sound of his own sobbing when he realized he wasn’t going to see him again. Rosiepuff explained it when he was older, how Ash had convinced Forrest to leave the tree with him to go on a music tour and how he planned to stay with that bastard so he could keep him from going back and hurting John or the eggs. (Apparently the bros weren’t part of the plan, and Ash would bring their eggs back to the tree to prevent Forrest from smashing them. Sick bastard.)

John Dory knew Ash was just trying to protect them and he will always be grateful to him for putting himself in danger for them to be safe. But a small part of him, the part that’s still a scared little kid, is still a little angry at him for leaving him to raise his brothers the way he did. It wasn’t his intention, and John is sure Ash thought Rosiepuff was taking care of them in his stead. He couldn’t have known she would leave him alone with the eggs for hours on end while she gambled the days away, losing most of the retirement money she had in the process and forcing John to have to drop out of school at twelve so he could work. But that doesn’t mean it was okay. Intentions only mean so much when the outcome was as bad as it was.

But, intentional or no, a large part of John Dory’s perfectionism stemmed from the stress of everything. Hell, his hair started going gray at fifteen because of how much stress he was under! The other part of it was his undiagnosed OCD. He obsessed over little things, starting small with his own stuff having to be organized in very specific ways, which slowly spread to the rest of the house and then to every aspect of his brothers lives. The band added more to it, causing his brain to go into overdrive with paranoia because they had to stay popular or else they’d be put back on the menu. That was the whole reason he made the band besides needing the money. After all, a happy Troll is a tasty Troll. And if they made the other Trolls happy, they got to stay alive.

The first thing John realized was that if they dressed the same and stood out enough, they’d be easily marked as ‘off limits’ come Trollstice, which is why he was so strict about how they all dressed, himself included. He didn’t want to constantly wear his goggles and puffy vest, but it made him easy to pick out in a crowd so he put up with it. This eventually led to him finding more and more things to control.

Then he overheard the King discussing an escape plan with some of the adults one night at a party for Princess Viva, who was friends with his brother at the time. Clay loved hanging out with her and John was only a year older than she was so they got along really well too and she’d invited them and their other brothers to her birthday party, thankfully a smaller affair in the royal pod with just a few friends.

He overheard Peppy talking to someone while he was looking for a snack to give to Spruce, he was worried about him skipping meals again, and heard him mention the ‘perfect family harmony’. He said it was strong enough to shatter any material, including steel and even diamonds. He wanted to find a group that could achieve it so they could break the cage around their tree and escape. That immediately had John hooked and he stayed and listened to the King’s plans so he knew what to do. He’d try to get his brothers to do the harmony so they could all escape.

That stupid fucking harmony was the worst thing to ever happen to John’s family. He became fucking obsessed with the damn thing, refusing to give up trying to do it even when his brothers complained. He had to do it, he promised himself he’d do whatever he had to to protect his brothers and this would save them all. It had to work, it had to, it had to.

It’s taken many years of therapy, but John is proud to be where he’s at now, all things considered. He has an amazing husband that loves him despite all of his faults and tendency to color coordinate literally everything, a great brother-in-law and an awesome sister-in-law to keep them all on track, and a large family like he’d always dreamed of. One would think he wouldn’t want to have his own kids after how he was raised but he loves his babies more than literally anything in the world and is more than happy being a stay-at-home dad most of the time. Aside from his yearly hiking trips to the Neverglade Trail and monthly visits to Lonesome Flats, he rarely leaves the mountain village he’s called home for the last two decades. Not that he minds. He’s grown to love the eternal winter and beautiful landscape around their cabin and their kids love it too, being half Yodel Trolls.

Christopher James is the oldest of the bunch, usually going by ‘CJ’ or just Christopher. He looks the most like JD with his curly teal hair held back by John’s old orange goggles, though usually kept shorter in style like Hickory’s, cyan skin, and sky blue eyes. He turned nineteen a few months before the whole Rock Apocalypse thing happened. His boyfriend was part of Barb’s crew and John still laughs when he thinks about how angry and smitten CJ was when he saw Riff on that stage. John wasn’t there, thankfully, since he was still home with the younger kids away from that mess while CJ and Dolly had been visiting the Rock capital to see their friends, and Dolly totally snitched to him about how ‘lovestruck and stupid’ Christopher looked when he saw Riff playing his kit. He chased her around the house for an hour after that, much to John’s amusement.

Now, Riff is a very talented drummer, so John gets why Barb would’ve wanted him in her crew. Him and CJ are a total ‘power couple’, according to their friends from high school. They’ve known each other their whole lives, having met in elementary school when they were little, and started dating when Christopher was thirteen and Riff was fourteen and have been ride-or-die ever since. Hickory pretended to be all huffy and pissy when they first got together to put up a ‘protective dad’ front, but now that it’s been nearly seven years of watching their sappy teenage romance grow and evolve, he’s started betting with John and Dickory on when they’ll get married. He thinks it’ll be in the next few years, maybe after Riff finishes college, and Dickory said six months which earned him a punch to the shoulder. John thinks they’ll just elope without telling anyone on a random day, and that’s actually way more likely than Hickory probably thinks. (Don’t tell them John Dory said anything, though, he’s been sworn to secrecy.)

Their second oldest son, Doc, is definitely the smart one in the family. At seventeen, he’s also the tallest of his siblings and taller than John himself. His hair is long and dark green, usually kept tied back into a braid, and his eyes, mostly hidden by his glasses, are light green like Hickory’s along with his fur. He’s a total bookworm and loves fantasy stories and history books especially. While CJ ended up inheriting John’s dyslexia, Doc somehow has the opposite situation and has an almost photographic memory. (John’s pretty sure he’s also autistic since he has a lot of the same traits that Clay had like his sensitivity to loud noises and certain textures. He’s also very literal sometimes, not catching sarcasm or jokes in conversations, but he’s also aware of it enough that he doesn’t miss stuff as often as he used to.)

Dolly is their middle child at fifteen. She was a sweet, kind little girl growing up with fiery reddish-orange curls usually kept in pigtails and green eyes like her older brother. As a tween and teen, however, she’d been in this weird ‘emo-phase’ that John didn’t fully understand. It reminds him of Floyd when he started wearing darker clothes and dark makeup and listening to really emotional music. (He was a little worried at first when he noticed Dolly acting the same way but after talking to her a little bit, it turned out she was more attracted to the aesthetic then the emotional aspects, though she admitted that she had a few issues with depression and they got her into therapy for that.) Apparently, she was super curious after she heard one of the songs Riff and CJ made with a group of classmates and got a makeover from one of their female Rock Troll friends to try it out. She ended up loving the style change and started wearing black and dark colors almost exclusively and has for over five years now. John jokes that the rare occasions she wears an ‘actual color’ are like cryptid sightings, which she finds embarrassing and totally ‘not rock’n’roll’. Little shit.

Now, Rosie, full name ‘Rosanna Maria‘, is the second youngest and a total girly girl, unlike her sister. She also has fiery red hair but her eyes are light pink instead of blue or green and her fur is a darker turquoise. At ten years old, she’s already a strong little devil and John feels immense pride when he sees her stand up for herself. She’s been raised like Dolly to believe nobody was aloud to push her around and it’s already lead to her getting into quite a few fights at school; mostly Rosie kicking some other kid’s ass because they’d been picking on her or someone else and she just wanted to help. Hickory taught her how to punch people for self defense like the rest of their children, but Rosie is surprisingly strong for a small child and her hits can really hurt if she’s not careful. And despite her pretty pink princess-y style, she absolutely loves playing in the dirt and climbing trees. Hickory cried when she gave him a literal mud-pie when she was three and John still makes fun of him for it like he didn’t also sob his heart out when she gave him one on his own birthday that same year. (Shut up, you’d cry too.)

Finally, there’s the twins. Birch and Ross are six currently, Birch’s hair is sapphire blue and his skin is the same blueish shade as his three older siblings while Ross has red hair and pale green skin like Doc’s. Their eyes are the same shade of light blue, though, matching John Dory’s perfectly. While they’re very different in terms of looks, they’re alike in almost every other way. Both boys love pulling pranks on their siblings and parents, Birch having an affinity for building little contraptions and Ross being the trickster that thinks of fun things for him to make. (They don’t talk about the miniature glitter bomb incident and John will continue to keep it that way, thank you. He’s still finding bits of neon yellow glitter in their carpet to this day and it’s been almost two years. ‘Craft-world herpes’, as Dickory likes the call it.)

The boys also have this habit of speaking in unison or finishing each other’s sentences, which John admits can be a tiny bit freaky sometimes. Especially when they’re holding hands and asking questions while dressed the same. It’s a little too similar to the creepy twins from that one movie CJ loves to watch on Halloween. He better not’ve shown it to them, or he’s so grounded.

Weirdness aside, John Dory loves his family so much. His children are the most precious things he’s ever had a hand in creating and he’s grateful everyday that he gets to raise them into the amazing young adults they’re going to become. And he’s so, so happy that he can actually be there for them the way his parents weren’t for him and his brothers. He vowed the day he found Christopher’s egg in his hair that he would do everything in his power to be a good father and Hickory has always been an amazing help along the way.

John met Hickory and Dickory on the Neverglade Trail about eight months after he’d left the tree when he was eighteen. He’d been hiking higher and higher up the mountain despite not having the right supplies for the weather, and they found him tucked underneath a tree root where he had passed out from both hypothermia and starvation, having not eaten in two weeks. Hickory was only a year younger than John and while Dickory had originally planned to leave him to his fate, which John doesn’t really blame him for since they had no clue who he was or where he came from, Hick was adamant that they at least try to help him, especially once he realized John was also injured, one of his hands burned and dripping blood. They ended up dragging him to their family cabin, passed down from their parents after their deaths a decade before, to try to warm and patch him up.

It took a few days for John to fully wake up and the first thing he saw was a cute redheaded boy replacing the damp cloth on his forehead as he lay on a soft couch in front of a fireplace, wrapped in blankets. Unable to control his mouth because of the high fever he had, John had said something about how Hickory was the ‘cutest nurse he’d ever seen’, which made the younger boy blush bright red and scramble to the kitchen to get him some soup. He kept saying embarrassing shit the entire time he was awake that morning and when Dickory overheard his horrible attempts at flirting, he was both peeved and highly amused by his little brother getting all flustered.

Thankfully, John Dory was much more coherent the following day and was able to properly thank the two for helping him. And apologize for making Hickory uncomfortable, though the younger boy was quick to reassure him that it hadn’t made him uncomfortable by any means and that he was actually flattered that John thought he was cute, which in turn made John a stuttering, blushing mess.

Unfortunately, it turned out that John’s left hand was permanently damaged. The second degree burns on his hand and forearm where from when he’d tried to light a fire in a cave a few weeks prior and accidentally fell into it when he was fixing the small tinder pile he’d made because he passed out from a lack of nutrients, and the cave ended up collapsing the next day which is why he was out in the blizzard. He’d actually ended up burning his leg as well because of the angle of the fall and had a limp for weeks after, the injury hidden under the jeans he was wearing when he was found. Thankfully, he was able to get help with both his limp and his hand and only ended up with slight limitations in how much he can lift because of the physical therapy the village doctor showed him, but it took a long time for him to get there, since burns and hand injuries heal much slower and trickier. When asked about where he would be staying since he was going to need support during the rest of his recovery, Hickory hastily announced that he was staying with them for the time being, much to both John Dory and Dickory’s shock. John hadn’t expected them to continue hosting him after the initial few days, not wanting to continue mooching off of them, and was extremely surprised by Hickory’s declaration. And while Dickory had planned on asking John if he wanted to stick around for a little longer to get fully back on his feet, he certainly hadn’t expected Hickory to do it for him like that.

When they asked about it a few months later, Hick sheepishly admitted that he really didn’t want John Dory to leave and spoke without thinking because he panicked. But it worked out! John agreed to stay with them for the next few months to recover and rehabilitate his hand and leg, so long as he could do something to pay them back. Dickory refused to take any money from the kid, despite how much John insisted he had more than enough to pay him at least some rent, so he offered to clean around the house instead and Dick agreed after a bit of convincing.

At first, things were a bit weird at the cabin. Dickory still teases them for being so awkward the entire first week and how obvious it was that they liked each other but they wouldn’t say anything because they were both convinced the other didn’t feel the same way. They’d only known each other for a few days, anyway, and despite John’s previous attempts at flirting while woozy from a fever, he was way too chicken to actually say anything even remotely smooth to Hickory’s face after that. Of course the first time he hit on a cute guy, he was barely cognizant. God, he had never been so embarrassed in his life.

Hick wasn’t much better, though he found it funny to watch John get so flustered around him after he’d made the younger blush like a tomato that first day. It was really cute, especially when he’d try to flirt a little bit and JD would squeak and run away like a scared mouse. There’s a reason Hickory still calls him ‘Mäuschen’ to this very day.

From John’s perspective, though, he was just pathetic. It took over a month of him living with them for the two teens to actually talk without one of them finding an excuse to leave the room because of nerves. (Usually John Dory because he was a coward.)

It took a while but after the initial awkwardness started to wear off and they started to actually talk and become friends, John told him about what happened with his brothers. It had been almost a full year since he left the tree and the guilt was literally eating him alive. And after Hickory and his brother opened up to him about their ‘real jobs’ as bounty hunters (though Hickory was still technically being trained and he couldn’t go on any bounties by himself), he told Hickory everything. All of it, from the relationship he had with his parents and grandmother(who wasn’t mean to him by any means but wasn’t the best when it came to raising him or helping him), to raising his brothers mostly on his own and the band and why he did what he did. He’d had plenty of time to realize how much he screwed up and leaving the tree was the biggest regret he’d ever had. But he didn’t think he deserved to go back. He didn’t deserve to be part of their lives anymore, no matter how much he missed them and desperately wanted to see them all again. His brothers were better off without him there to boss them around and it was better that he was alone. He couldn’t hurt anyone if he was alone.

Hickory hated listening to John talk about himself that way and tried to reassure him that it wasn’t his fault he’d been so obsessed with things. While he hadn’t been there and wasn’t an older sibling himself, he completely understood that John was just doing what he thought he had to in order to survive and keep his family alive. “You didn’t have any other choice, Mäuschen. You did your best with what you had, that’s not your fault. You were hurting and didn’t have anyone to help you.”

“But I hurt them! I told my perfect, amazing, talented babies that they weren’t good enough as themselves because I wasn’t good enough for them!” John had cried, tears streaming down his face. “Just ‘cause I was having a shitty time doesn’t mean I should’ve treated them like crap. I don’t deserve to be in their lives, Hick. They’re better off without me.” His ears had drooped so low and his colors had actually started dulling as he spoke, which worried Hickory almost as much as John’s hiccuping sobs. “God, I’m a monster.” He mumbled under his breath, “I should’ve just died in that stupid blizzard.”

Hickory, not having any of that nonsense, immediately pulled John Dory into his lap to hold him against his chest, rocking them back and forth as John continued to cry his heart out into his shirt. “Liebling, you did not deserve to die because you made mistakes! Don’t you dare say that.” He pulled John’s face up and cupped his cheek with a stern expression. “Your brothers were lucky to have you as their caretaker, and I know that if they knew how hard it was for you, they would all welcome you back with open arms. You were hurting, Johnny, and had nobody to turn to. You didn’t mean to do or say any of the things you did, and I will not let you say those horrible things about yourself.” He rested their foreheads together. “Nobody is allowed to bad talk my Mäuschen, Liebling. That includes you.” That sent John into a stuttering and blushing meltdown, making him hide his face in Hickory’s chest as the Yodeler held him even closer. His tail slowly started wagging as Hickory began purring softly to comfort him, the soft curly hair on the end brushing Hickory’s legs. Before they realized it, they’d both fallen asleep like that, Hickory curled around John protectively and holding him to his chest.

That’s how Dickory found them a few hours later, still cuddling in John’s bed where they’d curled up, and couldn’t bring himself to wake and separate them. He simply covered them with a blanket and turned out the lights to let them get some more sleep. (He owed Delta a visit anyway. She won their bet and he owed her dinner from that one place she liked.)

Unsurprisingly, JD and Hickory finally started dating not long after that, over four months after John first showed up outside of their village. They were together for a year before they got engaged when John was nineteen and Hickory was eighteen. (And yeah, it was Hickory that asked John first.) They only invited Hickory’s brother and Delta along with a few of their friends and family as witnesses for the wedding, wanting to keep it small and private. Everything was going according to plan but then John found CJ’s little blue and green egg in his hair the night before the ceremony. He showed it to Hickory early the next morning because he didn’t want to keep it from him and had been absolutely terrified of his reaction. They hadn’t talked about kids at all before that point and John was honestly scared that Hickory wouldn’t want to stay with him after he knew about the egg. Thankfully, Hickory was more than ecstatic to be a father which made John feel so much better about the whole thing. The ceremony went on as planned and they told Dickory about it afterwards at the reception. The image of the usually stoic bounty hunter bouncing around like an excited toddler at the news of him becoming an uncle is one of John Dory’s favorite memories.

CJ was a chubby, smiley little baby, always laughing and giggling. John loved having him ride around in his hair like Bitty B used to do. And it was thinking about how much he missed when Bitty was that tiny that he realized he needed to go back. After speaking to his therapist, who he’d been seeing for over six months, he decided to finally go back home. He had to wait until CJ was a little older, and he couldn’t stay with them forever, of course, but he needed to at least visit and try to talk to his brothers and apologize. Hopefully they’d be willing to at least hear him out.

John waited until after CJ’s second birthday before going back to the Troll Tree. He decided to go alone, leaving CJ and Hickory mostly by themselves since Dickory was visiting Lonesome with Delta the next day. They both promised to behave and John didn’t believe their bullshit, knowing from experience just how mischievous his husband and son could get, but simply rolled his eyes and kissed both of them goodbye before he left. (Dickory decided to be an ass and ask where his goodbye kisses were as John was walking out the door and JD proceeded pick up one of his slippers that was by the doorway and threw it at him to smack him on the forehead while Delta just laughed at her stupid fiancé being an idiot.)

It took over a week to hike all the way from the Hinterland mountains all the way back north to Bergentown. He entered the gates in the dead of night so he could sneak under the cover of darkness, making it to the cage just as the sun started rising. He remembers standing there and staring at the tree in horror, the branches bare of any leaves or life and the soil around its roots dug up and torn to shreds with giant shoves and pick-axes abandoned in the grass. Pods were ripped apart and scattered around its base, clothes and other personal items left behind to rot in the elements.

Icy terror filled John in that moment and he bolted for his family’s pod, ‘please not them, please not them, PLEASE NOT THEM’ repeating in his head over and over again until he found it, right where it was last time he was there. The door had been ripped off of its hinges like a Bergen tried to look for someone inside, giant claw marks all over the walls and floors. Picture frames barely hung from their hooks on the walls, most of them scattered on the floor in pieces along with most of the trinkets Rosiepuff used to keep on shelves. He checked each room, hoping and praying that he was wrong, that his brothers were just hiding somewhere, that he hadn’t been too late.

He hadn’t realized it at the time, too frantic and scared to notice anything beyond the destruction around him, but his colors had begun to fade as soon as he saw the tree in ruins. When he couldn’t find anyone in the pod, his heart shattered to pieces and all he remembers is crumbling to the floor in his and his brothers old room, clutching Branch’s stuffed caterpillar to his chest as he sobbed. His colors completely disappeared, leaving him gray with grief, but he couldn’t care less about that. Not when he knew his family was gone. He hadn’t been there to protect them, it was his fault they were dead. He killed them, he killed them, he killed them! IT SHOULD’VE BEEN HIM!!

John didn’t know how long he lay there, curled up on the ugly old rug in his old room. (John Dory hated that stupid fucking rug growing up. Rosiepuff had picked it out years ago and him and his brothers hated it because of the weird pinkish-yellow color. In that moment, though, it was the most comfortable thing in the world to him.) It could’ve been days for all he knew. But the sound of thundering footsteps reminded him exactly where he was and he panicked as he realized the Bergens were waking up. In a haze, John grabbed as many mementos as he could carry in his pack, even taking things out to make more room, before he snuck back out of the pod and ran for the gates.

The fact he didn’t get caught was a minor miracle and he doesn’t remember what happened after that, really. The hike back home was a complete blur, his brain staying in survival mode so he wouldn’t break down in the middle of the wilderness. He paid no mind to his dulled skin and vision, all of the color around him losing its vibrancy like he lost his own. He ignored how hungry he was, how thirsty and tired he was, because all he could focus on was getting away. Getting back home, back to safety.

The next time John remembered being aware of anything around him, he was standing in front of the cabin door as Hickory opened it. He’d immediately become extremely concerned and tried to ask what happened, and without being able to hold it back any longer, John Dory broke down right there. His wailing sobs were loud enough that Dickory heard him from inside and when he came running to see JD on their porch sobbing and colorless in Hickory’s arms, barely able to stand, they both carried him inside and to their bedroom to lay him down. He cried for hours, clinging to his husband desperately as Hickory and Dickory both tried their best to comfort him.

It took all night for John to calm down enough to tell them what happened. Hickory, horrified by what John had found, held him close as he continued to cry into his chest. He eventually passed out from exhaustion and probably dehydration, tears still streaming down his face as Hickory played with his hair. It had turned pitch black and went limp and useless after his colors fully faded, his curls ratty and tangled from his nonstop journey back. Thankfully, Hickory was more than willing to detangle it, his fingers gently carding through it so he wouldn’t wake John up and putting it into a simple braid. (Losing the ability to use his hair was the biggest challenge later on, though John got used to it over time. He still tried to teach his kids how to use their own hair if they could. Dolly and Doc’s hair is more like Hickory’s and they can’t stretch it like Rosie and CJ can but they did get the ability to change the color at will. It definitely made for interesting games of hide-and-seek.)

Dickory got ahold of Delta at some point that night and she offered to watch Christopher for a few days while John got some rest and tried to start processing his grief. She knew it wasn’t going to be easy for him after such a huge loss, but she knew he needed as much support as they could give him. She also recommended a few things they could do to make him physically comfortable, knowing his grayness was likely going to make him both sensitive and closed-off emotionally. She was so helpful and supportive and John means it when he says he loves that woman. Honestly, if he wasn’t gay as fuck and married, he would’ve probably tried to steal her from Dickory years ago.

After a few days of comforting cuddles and reassurances from both Hickory and his brother, John asked to see CJ. Being gone for over two weeks already had him eager to see his son again, as he hadn’t ever been away from him for that long. And even though he was still very fragile and weepy, he needed to see his baby.

So Delta brought Christopher home, the two year old excited to see his daddy after being apart for so long. John immediately burst into tears when CJ ran up to his bedside after Delta put him down by the door and he climbed up to cuddle with him under the many fuzzy blankets. John held him in his arms for a long time, kissing his forehead and rocking them back and forth.

At one point CJ pulled away enough to place both paws on John’s cheeks, a tiny frown on his adorable little face. “Why Dada sad?”

John had whimpered and pulled CJ back into his embrace. “Dada found out something bad about his family and he’s hurtin’, bubba,” Hickory’s voice spoke softly, the newish twang coming through. (He’d figured out that he was more comfortable as a Country Troll a year before that after he’d gone undercover for a hunt and John loved hearing how the newer accent sounded with Hickory’s deep voice.) He was still sitting nearby for support, rubbing John’s back as he shook. “He’s sad because he lost your uncles. That’s why we gotta help him feel better.”

CJ frowned more at that and looked up at John with determination in his eyes. “I help!” He then curled up against John’s chest, hugging him as tightly as his little arms could manage. “Papa and me love you lots an’ lots, an’ so does Uncle D and Auntie!” He looked up at John with big watery eyes. “Please don’ be sad, Dada. I know that uncles love you too and they wou’n’t wan’ you to be sad, neither.”

John had promptly burst into tears and snuggled CJ even closer. He’d always kept his brothers as a part of his life, even if he wasn’t contacting them, and told CJ stories all the time since he wanted his son to know his family. The fact that he said that made John Dory feel so, so much better in that moment. It didn’t fix anything, of course it hadn’t. But his son trying to reassure him that his brothers loved him and wouldn’t want him to be upset about their deaths helped kickstart his healing. (And he wasn’t the only one crying that day, Hickory and Delta both tearing up at the toddler’s declarations. Even Dickory’s eyes got all misty, though he’d never admit it.)

It definitely wasn’t easy after that. John tried to take everything day-by-day, tried to continue living, and for the most part, he succeeded. He got pregnant with Doc not long after the incident, and he was grieving but was still so happy to be having another baby (even if the new set of aches and cravings were a pain in the ass). He found Rhonda as a baby while on a solo hike a few years after that when Dolly was a toddler and raised her too like she was his own. Rosie was next and John chuckled for the first time in years when Hickory complained about his headaches the entire time he carried her in his hair until she detached. (John had the rest of their eggs but Hickory wanted to do it at least once to make it ‘a little more fair’. He definitely didn’t enjoy it as much as John did, that’s for sure.) John carried Ross and Birch after that mess.

John couldn’t bring himself to sing for a very long time after his return to the Troll Tree. He couldn’t listen to his brothers voices without crying and refused to listen to their albums and songs for months. CJ loved their songs since John had listened to them with him since he was an egg, and he’d sing them to try and cheer John Dory up. Surprisingly, it actually helped a lot. He was able to slowly work up to listening to their music again thanks to Christopher’s voice.

It took years of therapy and time. So, so much time. But after almost fourteen years of pain and grief and colorless existence, John’s color coming back was a total shock. He’d been gray for so long by that point that he honestly forgot what it was like to be colorful. He got them back in the most unexpected way, too.

One night, not long after the twins had hatched, John was walking the halls on another late-night safety check to make sure the windows were locked and the stove was off. Again. (OCD can really go fuck itself, honestly.) And he checked their room last because it was the closest to his own. Both boys were fast asleep in their cribs and when John got closer to look at them, he saw that Birch had a caterpillar plush in his chubby little arms.

‘Hick must’ve gotten it out of storage.’ John thought, his eyes watering a little bit. The old green plush was clutched tightly in Birch’s little paws and for a split second, he looked exactly like Branch did when he was a baby. “Oh, I bet B would be so jealous right now,” he whispered, trying not to wake them as he gently played with Birch’s little toes. “You found Kroco, huh, bud? That thing’s older than your brothers and sisters, you know.” He remembers making it for Branch after he’d hatched and smiles softly. “You’re Uncle Branch was obsessed with that thing. I think he’d fight you for it if he could see you drooling on it like that.”

Birch squirmed a little bit but didn’t wake up, and John shushed him lightly, squeezing his feet reassuringly. “Shh, it’s okay, it’s okay, baby. You can keep Kroco, Itsy Bitsy. I think Branch would understand.” He realized what he’d called him and instead of the guilt he expected, it felt right to call Birch that. It was a nickname he’d used for Branch when he was a baby, before they came up with ‘Bitty B’ as his stage name. He’d been avoiding using similar nicknames for his kids until that moment and was surprised at how okay he was with it.

A little overwhelmed, John sniffled and tried to compose himself a little bit. “My little Itsy Bitsy. I love you so much, bud.” He kissed Birch’s forehead softly, stopping to kiss Ross’s too. “Love you too, Rossy Flossy.”

John quickly snuck back out into the hall and cried into his hands for a while. Afterwards, feeling drained and exhausted, he pulled himself together enough to make his way back to bed and cuddled against his husband as he fell back asleep. He woke up that next morning with a headache, mumbling about how bright it was and complaining into Hickory’s chest. He’d gotten up after about thirty minutes, reluctant to leave Hickory in their warm bed but needing to brush his teeth, and ignored how weirdly light his hair felt. It hadn’t regained it’s gravity defying quality in all the years he’d been gray so he usually kept it braided back when he slept but doesn’t remember doing it the night before so it was probably just tangled as hell. He’d have to wash it and detangle with that fancy comb thing Delta gave him.

JD stumbled into their bathroom and yawned as he turned on the light so he could see. He then looked in the mirror and gasped when he saw his reflection. His hair was standing up, curly as ever and bright teal with grays that weren’t there before, and his eyes, which had been silver for over a decade, were sky blue like they were when he was younger. His skin was light cyan instead of pale gray and he could actually see just how brightly colored his pajamas were, the neon orange pants and purple t-shirt clashing so badly he actually laughed for a second. “Holy shit, who picked this out? Even my taste isn’t this bad.” Then it really hit him like a truck that his fucking colors were back. And he screamed. “AHHHH!!!”

Hickory had just woken up as well and was used to John’s grumpy morning muttering so he’d rolled back over to go back to sleep. But when he quickly sat up at John Dory’s screaming and looked at his husband where he was standing in the bathroom doorway, he literally fell out of their bed in shock.

John let out a laugh then covered his mouth. He hadn’t actually laughed in years, only chuckling softly on occasion, and suddenly he can barely contain his giggles as his husband cursed and struggled with their sheets and blankets. “Babe, you’re such an idiot, holy crap. Hold on, let me help.” He went over and helped Hickory, smiling wider as he rested his paws on his hips once he was freed. “You are so lucky I’m patient, good God.”

Shaking himself after his fall, Hickory stared in disbelief seeing John’s beautiful blues staring right back at him. “Johnny, what- You- Holy fuck!” He’d missed those eyes so fucking much that he didn’t care about the fact that he was still in just his boxers as he jumped up from the sheet pile on the floor and tackled John in a hug, lifting and spinning him around and making John laugh loudly. It had been so, so long since he’d heard John Dory’s laugh outside of the occasional soft chuckle and Hickory had to stop himself from crying. “Oh my God, I missed that sound. You sound like bells! My little blue bell.”

“Oh, shut- No, you are not using that again,” John groaned, his face flushed as he laughed harder.

“Wow…” Hickory whispered. John’s giggles died down a little as he put him back in his feet, Hick looking at him with this almost mesmerized expression. “You look so pretty.” John blushed even more and Hickory chuckled. “I forgot how pink you get. You look like a little bucket o’ those fancy blueberries you like.”

John smacked him lightly, blush deepening. “Fuck off, oh my God.”

“Dad! Dad, are you o-kay…?” John’s screams had alerted Dolly, Doc, Rosie, and Christopher who all came running to see what happened and all of them gasped seeing John’s colorful appearance. “Dad!?” Doc whispered again, his eyes wide. He was holding Ross who looked even more confused than he did.

Rosie gasped, showing off her missing front tooth, and squealed. “Daddy looks so pretty!” She even started bouncing on her toes in excitement, making the pink tutu she wore bounce with her.

Dolly was covering her mouth and started tearing up. “Holy crap- what- what happened?”

CJ looked like he was going to cry too. He was the only kid old enough to remember what John looked like before, at least outside of a few pictures from back then, and seeing him so bright again was making his own eyes water. He had Birch in his arms, perched on his hip, and he looked extra curious about what had everyone so emotional.

John gasped too seeing them, their own greens, blues, and oranges so much more vibrant than he was used to. “Oh my God.” He pulled away from Hickory as he looked each of them over, taking in the details of his children he hadn’t seen before as he tried really hard not to cry. Doc’s hair was brighter than he thought, more evergreen than dark pine green, Dolly’s orange curls were slightly darker than Hick’s, Christopher’s fur was more greenish-cyan than he remembered, and Rosie’s outfit was probably five different shades of pink, good God, who dressed her? The toddler ran up to him and John couldn’t help but laugh as he picked her up and spun her around, much like Hick had done to him. “You’re all so bright! Look at you, oh my gosh!”

“You can see our colors now?” Doc asked. He seemed nervous but also excited.

John chuckled then shifted Rosie to one side and offered his paw to his second oldest, grinning when the teen immediately latched onto him. “Yep. And you’re greener than I expected, beanstalk.” Doc looked unamused and John snickered. “I knew that nickname was perfect!”

Then he noticed the dark red streak in Dolly’s fringe and gasped again. “Wait, Dolly, did you dye your fucking hair?! When did you do that?!” CJ and Doc both started laughing hysterically as Dolly stammered and Hickory just rolled his eyes as John started interrogating her.

Then Dickory came running into the room, half dressed and barely awake with a machete in his hand. “I heard screaming, what happened?!” He stumbled when he saw John Dory and stared in disbelief, dropping the machete. “Heilige Scheiße.”

“Dickory Louise Bauer, stop that yellin’! It is too damn early for you to be that loud.” Delta came in behind him looking equally sleepy and irritated at his volume until she saw John and gasped, her eyes widening. “Holy hell, Johnny, what- how- when did you-” She stuttered for a few seconds before huffing and stamping her hooves before walking back out of the room, muttering to herself, “I ain’t had enough coffee yet for this shit.”

Rosie giggled as John just rolled his eyes and chuckled at his sister-in-law’s reaction. Dickory was still staring at him and John had raised an eyebrow. “Can I help you?”

Dickory narrowed his eyes and stared for another few seconds before he huffed. “I forgot how obnoxious you looked. Viel zu hell.” He dodged the pillow John threw at him and bolted back out the door while shouting about ‘elder abuse’. John ran after him, still holding Rosie as she giggled up a storm, and the rest of the kids followed excitedly, leaving Hickory alone in their bedroom with a fond smile on his face.

Of course, it wasn’t all easygoing after his colors came back, either. He’d been gray for so long that he was still prone to have depressive thoughts and still opted to continue going to therapy for that, but his bad days were definitely not as often as before. There were days where he’d gray out again for seemingly nothing and he’d be in a bad place for a few days, but Hickory was always there to help, along with all of his kids. John’s colors did dim just a bit during the week after they returned, which made him panic at first thinking that he’d done something wrong. But his therapist reassured him that it was normal for grayed Trolls to be slightly duller once their colors returned. The only signs of John’s grayness nowadays are the streaks of black in his hair, certain strands scarred forever, and his skin dulling to a slightly gray-ish cyan blue, but that could all be attributed to the Rock Troll in them too.

He knew that he wouldn’t ever stop grieving for his brothers. John had accepted that a long, long time ago. But with his family by his side, both found and gained, he knew that he was strong enough to keep going. Besides. He’ll see them again one day.

Hopefully not for a while, though. He’s got future grandkids to spoil.

IM NOT DEAD YALL WHATS GOOOOOD

lol no but fr it’s been a hot minute since I’ve uploaded literally anything here (hi how yall doin 👉🏻👉🏻*tries to wink but ends up blinking instead*) and I am so happy to be back

Hope y’all like this little AU, I’ve been trying to get back into the groove with writing since my mental heath took a nosedive in June 🫠 I already put this up on AO3 so y’all can check it out there too lol and I’ll be trying to write more for this soon so keep an eye out

Love y’all and see y’all next time! (AND HAPPY NEW YEAR)

~ Boog

#trolls band together #trolls john dory #trolls #hickdory

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