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realizing the imposter syndrome from feeling like i’m too dumb to ever pass the bar is now bleeding into my creative hobbies just when i was finally starting to feel okay about my writing again anyway i need to drink bleach out of a wine glass

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Trying to speed run the Stormlight Archives so that I can engage with the community without being spoiled. It’s like trying to watch a movie trilogy but every movie is 69 hours long with 15 bazillion things I have to pause and google.

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im a kandreil truther, them being in a queer platonic relationship, but also them having a partnership that doesnt fall into labels necessarily

i think all of them are necessary for each other and balance each other out, also having an understanding and connection with each other that is more than a friendship

idk just thoughts i really like all 3 of them together and feel like each pair have a distinct relationship, andrew and neil are one way, kevin and neil another, kevin and andrew are different but they all work out

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imagine being such a good boykisser that the boy who never wants to kiss anyone thinks he could die happy after spending his last days on earth having the privilege to kiss you and the kicker is, he means this literally bc he's certain he'll die, and then he almost does. not only that, but you're such a good boykisser that after said boy is tortured and almost killed and left extremely injured, one of his top sources of anxiety is that you might not kiss him again. genuinely no one was doing it like andrew minyard.

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more aftg! sooo excited for the next books to come out

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"Was this book good or was I deeply 19 when I read it:" an investigative journalism series

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why did neil just accept that andrew was putting him in hot little outfits

why was andrew playing dress to impress with a real man he hated

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Imagining in the future when Kevin is on a pro team (with a bunch of players who obviously aren’t up to his standards, because who is) and he is absolutely laying into them all the time and is always bringing up

“Neil Josten would come to the court every single night and practice these drills and you can’t even do them for fifteen minutes”

“Neil Josten once fired shots with Andrew Minyard in goal for a whole night and blew out his arms just because he was stubborn and you can’t even handle shooting on (insert goalie’s name)?”

“Neil Josten played better than you while he was actively running from the Mafia. You think you have other things on your mind?”

Bonus if after a year or two of dealing with this Kevin’s team finally meets Neil at an exy banquet and tattle on him. And Neil is just “??? You literally texted me two weeks ago just to tell me my passes are dogshit? My team hadn’t even played a game or anything, you had just remembered and felt like bringing it up?”

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the way neil was willing to let himself be tortured on andrew's behalf literally months before they even kissed.... like he didn't even know he liked kissing andrew yet, he didn't even know that was an option for him!! but that didnt matter because andrew needed him and neil was going to do whatever he must to try and keep him safe.

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i LOVE the transition from kevin being the number one person andrew protects and hes the one who rides in the passenger seat in andrew's car to Neil being the most protected person and kevin riding in the backseat.

to the point where neil can lightly hit kevin in the head and andrew doesn't even bat an eye

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i’m a andreil hand on thigh truther. you just know any moment that it’s possible andrew is gripping neil’s thigh for dear life. he loves the subtle show of possession. neil is his, and no one else’s.

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shout out to jean and neil who are real haters at heart but turn into loverboys at the mention of their boyfriends

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my thought process of reading the king's men while listening to conan gray's discography really made the experience more fucked up

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“the monsters” and it’s a guy who’s dedicated his whole life to the sport he loves, a guy who’s just trying to become a doctor and hang out with his girlfriend, a guy who flew across the world at the age of 19 and left everything behind to take care of two kids he barely knew, and a guy who would give up everything to keep his family

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why did neil just accept that andrew was putting him in hot little outfits

why was andrew playing dress to impress with a real man he hated

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neil being completely oblivious to andrew liking him and at the same time EVERYBODY being like "dude wtf he doesn't do any of these things for anyone else even though he knows us for years" and neil is "i just asked him"

dude he gave you his car key, he gave the house key, he tells stuff from his oast, he literally LISTENS to you and trusts you to keep Kevin safe and kevin is one of the most important people to him, AND HE GIVES YOU GIFTS LIKE EVERYTIME YOU GO OUT TO COLUMBIA

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Best things for a ship to have or be:

Horny

Insane

Religious/spiritual themes

Obsession

Age gap

Doomed