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It’s time.

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Heat index was 110 degrees so we offered him a cold drink. He went for a full body soak instead

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Fun idea

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been howling at these for half an hour

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Item: Frog Piano

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Mission: Impossible is THE franchise

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Mission Impossible Dead Reckoning Part One (2023) Pom Klementieff / Paris

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Y'all practical effects bitches are really sleeping on the Mission: Impossible movies.

"Oh everything is CGI these days!" Mission: Impossible uses practical effects whenever it's safe to do so, and their definition of safe is incredibly skewed because Tom Cruise is, frankly, batshit insane.

The man refuses to use stunt doubles because he insists the audience can tell when it's not him. He's apparently one of the best stunt drivers in the world. He drove up a cliff and skidded to a stop right on the edge for real in Dead Reckoning. He got a fucking helicopter license and spent like three years training for the climactic scene in Fallout.

Most of the helicopter chase in Fallout was real. The midair oxygen-tank swap in that movie was also real. They practiced for it in a wind tunnel and then did the real thing in freefall.

When Tom Cruise dies, it's either going to be because he realized Scientology was a crock and tried to get out and they fucking killed him (highly unlikely that he'll ever come to that realization), or because his luck finally ran out while filming a stunt for a Mission: Impossible movie (significantly more likely).

Seriously, if you have the blu-rays of any of these movies, I strongly encourage you to watch them with the director's commentaries. Especially the ones directed by Christopher McQuarrie. That man has an almost pathological distaste for CGI (and when they do have to use it, he's incredibly respectful and complimentary of the people who do the special effects).

Do yourself a favor and watch these movies. They're not just kitschy action flicks. They're kitschy action flicks with a metric fuckton of practical effects, and a production team that really cares about the stories they're crafting.

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EVERYONE

Everyone, I am FULLY LOSING IT about Mission Impossible 5 and am now the world’s most dedicated Ethan Hunt/Benji Don’t Know His Last Name Shipper FOR LYFE.

Warning: I’m about to vigorously state a number of FACTS about the Mission Impossible Franchise which may or may not be “actually” ….”true”, because the movies are SO long you guys, SO LONG, and the stories are often the kind of convoluted that make sense at the time but don’t hold up under scrutiny and I’ve seen them all but DEFINITELY fell asleep while Tom Cruise was running** in that sandstorm in the fourth (?) one, but ANYHOW, these are the “facts” as I understand them, my LIVED EXPERIENCE of these movies.

**there are lots of reasons to be dubious about Tom Cruise: Movie Star but holy hot damn is he good at RUNNING as FAST as he CAN through a variety of scenic locales. Jesus Christ. If you made a supercut of Tom Cruise RUNNING scenes it would probably be a riveting six hour retrospective.

ANYHOW: Mission Impossible: 5.

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Ilsa Faust + the Thigh Move™️

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Tis better to have half-assed than to never have assed at all

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Wait a second- did Hodgson know Hickey would kill Irving?

Rewatching episode 7 and another strange thread stuck out to me this time:

Did Hodgson know that Hickey would kill Irving? 

Terror clickbait!

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snowing hard this morning. the terror ice master failed to predict the ice shifting the ship to the opposite angle. Only thing he said was “we slidin” i cant stop thinking about this

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“At present, I am horrified with myself for containing—having devoured him—the dearest and only lover who ever loved me. I am his tomb. The earth is nothing. Dead. Staves and orchards issue from my mouth. His. Perfume my chest, which is wide, wide open. A greengage plum swells his silence. The bees escape from his eyes, from his sockets where the liquid pupils have flowed from under the flaccid eyelids. To eat a youngster shot on the barricades, to devour a young hero, is no easy thing. We all love the sun. My mouth is bloody. So are my fingers. I tore the flesh to shreds with my teeth. Corpses do not usually bleed. His did.”

Funeral Rites, Jean Genet, tr. Bernard Frechtman

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Crozier and Fitzjames' Dialogue during their off-screen fight in episode 5, from Dave K Q&A 3

James: “We both know what is happening with you and I came to discuss it, as a friend!”

Francis: “That word is alien here! You don’t have friends, James, you have admirers. That I am not one has always chafed you!”

James: “Don’t sell me a dog about this, Francis! You are caught in the grip of this and it’s coopered you out. It’s made you dennis, man!”

Francis: “I am out of words for you!” (Dave K: Which is a really handy line in, I think, any marriage.)

James: “Do you think it was possible to hide this from a ship full of seamen? Most of whom share this affliction on land?”

Francis: “You’re a miserable man. A miserable poltroon of a man, James.”

James: “You’re going to name it, by God. How must I do to get the word out of you? Hound you? Call you out? I will do!”

They did film the scene (iirc) but they didn't keep it in because Dave thought it would falter next to the "Do you plan on being the worst kind of first as well?" and Francis hitting James in front of people.

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James Fitzjames + that strange, empty look when he encounters violence or something reminiscent of war

A follow up to 'shell shock'