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must be the worse composition ever to show in pictures (but very cool in the sketchbook)

ref (the cover of chapter 57) ⬇️

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Painting study with young silco

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I already shared this but I gave it a background at last, and fixed Dazai's face that was bugging me. Now it's one of my favorite drawings because of the concept and I will probably redraw them someday. I love the contrast between their books (as in the first post: a book about how to live, a book about how to die) and themselves and I wanted the background to show that. I see Kunikida as more conflicted than Dazai. He has a gun in one hand and the ideals by which he wants to live a worthy life in the other, but during all the story we see him continuously questioning those ideals and himself and throwing away his life too easily. And then Dazai, who doesn't value his life at all and never will but who found his light and doesn't need anything else. Dazai belongs in the sunset.

I absolutely get why Asagiri would like to write more about them if he could. But the industry is what it is 😔

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°●•Bodacious Commissions!•●°

(10 SLOTS)

More soupy info down below ⬇️

Wahoo I’m finally opening commissions. I would’ve gotten to this sooner but procrastination is my best friend, and I had the worst art block of all time. But fear not, I gained motivation again and wanna do commissions!

Just a few more things to help clarify and bring attention to, so please read.

I draw human or humanoid characters only

BSD is my main fandom. I’m ok with other fandoms, but BSD is my main interest.

I only offer these two styles atm because I’m not at all confident on my colored art. I’ll do colored stuff in the future, but for now, I offer just these two styles. (BOTH STYLES AREN'T COLORED)

I take payment through KO-FI only

DM ME HERE FIRST BEFORE REQUESTING SLOT. Just to help me, let’s keep either tumblr, or my discord if you wish, our main source of contact for communication. That’s how I’ll deliver your WIPs and finished comm as well.

NSFW: I’m willing to draw nsfw stuff. While I’m ok with drawing some nsfw stuff, I’m not ok with all nsfw stuff. I did a very vague list, but there are definitely specific things I will not draw. I didn’t wanna make a list, but just know that there will be things I will refuse to draw. I have all rights to refuse something if it makes me too uncomfortable. Just ask me first. I’m pretty open. I’ll draw your fav getting it on 😎

Any more questions, just ask!

My KO-FI link (it’s a little nakey rn bare with me)

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I am watching Jinx edits while crying like a baby at 23 YEARS OLD. I am a GROWN WOMAN crying over an animated tv show!!!!

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Had to sit down for arcane act 2 I'm absolutelynotokay and destroyed rn ...

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get jinxed bitch pls credit me if you repost :)

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Jinx for arcane season 2 ✨

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The process of creating is the active, constant question of the self, to question the extent of my capacities to convey a message worth of people's respect and admiration. To me, Look Back is a tale of self-reafirmation for Tatsuki Fujimoto. I'm aware it came out in the gap between part 1 and part 2 of the author's best seller, Chainsaw man, which makes this oneshot such an intimate soul-shaking story after what may be the pinnacle of his career. This made me question, why would he write this kind of story after CSM (and Fire Punch) anyways?

Through Fujino and Kyomoto's journey (which funnily, their names convined are Fuji-moto) we are put in the shoes of the stirring yet self-doubting mind of the creator: "why do you draw manga? why do you create?" is the question the protagonist has to find the answer for. Fujino navigate her life for her passion and pride as a talented story-teller artist, while Kyomoto does so for her love for art itself in a more reserved and personal way. Combined, I think they are the rope that pushes Fujimoto back and forth in his mind, the fear of the creator to tell a story worth of people's respect (Fujino) while being faithful to oneself (Kyomoto). Fujimoto knows there always will be an expectation, a mark above his head everytime someone is aware a new story has his signature, so it's understandable for anxiety to take the worst of you, the fear to be openly judged by the masses. So why do you even bother to get through that unpleasant thing? will I ever surpass what I made in my past projects? why do I keep creating? is this all I will ever be? the entire process is tiresome, boring, a never-ending task, I enjoy art better as a consumer anyways, so why?

If there's only one person who my art made their day better, made them smile or excited for what is coming next, then it was worth every single second I spend working on it.

It's a reafirmation to keep going. That I was born to live into this world for this sake, and I'm worthy to connect and receive this love. This is my place.

I deeply respect you for it, Tatsuki Fujimoto.

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Fujimoto has perfected creating the most authentically selfish characters. I feel in many stories characters' selfishness are justified through the narrative. That they have suffered through something so significant they deserve to be selfish. I'm not saying I disagree with that sentiment, selfishness is necessary for self preservation at times. But what Fujimoto does is very different.

His characters are selfish consistently. They want to be the best, make the best movies, be good, and be known for being good. Their selfishness is not justified and it feels awkward and cringy. They often do awful things and think about it hundreds of times until finally their thoughts overlap in such a way they have convinced themselves they did the right thing. Sometimes, they never had to convince themselves.

Denji wants a normal life, but he wants fame! He wants tons of girlfriends, but he wants to be loved unconditionally! Asa wants to save Denji, but she's really thinking about how good she'll look saving him! She sits in front of a TV giggling about how awesome she looks killing a giant devil and being renowned for it. Fujino scared that Kyomoto will become a better artist than them, actively attempts to trap Kyomoto with them and keep Kyomoto from going to art school.

There is no justice in their actions. They have no right to feel the things they do, do the things they do, yet they feel these selfish wants with all their might. They are children sure, but the adults have the same selfishness twisted in more wicked ways, backed up by legalities and, what they presume to be, rational thought. Justifying selfishness is what an adult does. Being selfish is what a child does. And being selfish should not be demonized, nor should it be justified.

Selfishness is part of the heart. It is part of us, and no matter what we do, we will act with selfish precision.

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!!️ Do not ignore my message. It is an emergency. There is nothing left for us. Now I need your help to buy medicine urgently. It is very expensive, worth $600. An anaesthetic for the pain. Because he suffers from amputation in his left foot He also needs to travel to continue the necessary treatment procedure. Please, you are my hope. Just donate what you can to my brother😭💔💔

Https://gofund.me/73d4b003

!!!!

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Experimenting with painting style

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Dazai and momiji

(from a mayoi card) ⬇️

quality is bad... I know I should scan everything instead of photos but it broke. one day I will 🥹

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Kinda in the mood drawing my oc hoo

Wip redesign my ane oc

Old design:

I still haven't pick color scheme for her...I took her eyepatch back since Neuhaus's design already has them xD

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BsdTWT being incredibly dense is frustrating

"Asagiri acts like he isn't in charge of his own characters" "just write a KNDZ light novel or something" "bro can just write Kunikida content if he wants nobody is forcing him"

Asagiri has bills he needs to pay, his editors need paid, Harukawa needs paid. Nobody is physically forcing him to write SKK content but he is pressured into doing it because it makes money, and all of the people working on the series need money to survive. Fans don't care as much if there's no Dazai and/or Chuuya, but they lose their shit if those two are on screen. It gets them paid.

There are Light Novels with KNDZ, LN1 and 55 minutes exist, but really only Kunikida fans talk about LN1 because its all we have for his character. Nobody gives a shit about 55 minutes because its not: a Dazai backstory, nor is it SKK bait. Which is sad bc 55 MINUTES IS REALLY GOOD

Fans have proven that they don't care about the content of the series if it doesn't involve their top 5 or so favorite blorbo's, so please don't act like its completely incomprehensible that Asagiri feels forced to write SKK content over the shit he actually wants to write in his series because he wants money so he and his team can survive.