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[alightwithdestiny-blog]

Anniversary with God :)

It's been a year since my encounter with God, an encounter that has truly brought change in my life. Kung iisipin, sobrang dami na ring nagbago sa akin. My life wasn't anymore for pleasing others, but for pleasing God. Now I can be bold with His word, conquering every fear and doubt I have of myself. I have gained confidence in Him - confidence that I never even imagined I could have. From a person who can barely lift her hands up to the Lord, to a lady who's starting to lead others to God. Through the change He has brought in my life, I have been able to share the hidden and dark part of my life - the past me, that's trying to cover every dirt I have in me.

SINO BA AKO DATI? ETO ANG STORYA KO...

Dati ang buhay ko akala ko okay na. 'Di kami naghihirap ng pamilya ko. Okay naman yung grades ko. Feeling ko masaya na. Pero, sa labas lang lahat ng 'yun. Ilang taon na akong may tinatago. For more than two years, hindi ko sinabi sa iba 'yung naging sexual relationship ko sa sarili kong kuya. Nung naopen up ko na, akala ko okay na ako. But still I was longing for love. Nagka-crush ako na naging ka-MU. Parang kami pero walang label. Umabot sa point na binigay ko lahat. Inaamin ko na sa simula masaya naman talaga, "mahal" ko e. Pero dumating lang talaga sa punto na sinabi ko sa sarili ko, "Eto na lang ba talaga 'yun? Binigay ko na lahat, pero bakit ang empty? Bakit hindi na ako masaya? Hanggang dito na lang ba talaga 'to?". Naghanap pa ako ng pagmamahal sa mga mangang binasa ko at kinaadikan ko. Hanggang sa nagising ako sa katotohanan. Matagal na palang may bumubulong sa akin na, "Ezza, hindi ka lang para diyan. May mas maganda Akong nilaan para sa 'yo, isang pagmamahal na higit pa sa maiisip mo." Noong una, natakot ako na baka hindi na ako pwedeng bumalik at makaexperience ng tunay ng pagmamahal. Sinasabi ko pa, "May magmamahal pa ba sa akin? E ang dumi-dumi ko na. May tatanggap pa ba sa akin?". Pero simula nung naencounter ko na talaga Siya, naramdaman kong accepted ako, na pwede pa, na may nagmahal, nagmamahal at magmamahal pa sa akin nang totoo. Hindi pala kailangang magmadali, at hindi na pala kailangang magpakaadik sa manga, because just by encountering Him and accepting Him, He let me experience that kind of love, a love that keeps no record of wrongs, a love that never fails, the love that I have been longing for years. Grabe lang talaga yung power ng true love ni Lord! :))

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Been a while since I last posted here. Having a hard time thinking how I should end the story I started back when I was in my first year in high school. I wanted to make a character meet God and change, but then it seems hard to construct a story like that. When I think about it, God's just so awesome in changing stories, in changing lives. It's just so awesome that it's hard to write a make-up story about it. Iba pa rin pag personal experience :)

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Didn't have the chance to post my devotional for October 28 and 29. Still got hangover from the G12 National Conference. xD Grabe ang anointing. Grabe ang Holy Spirit. :DD Excited for the next conferences. Aiming for patron and more people. There are no limits with God! :DDD

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BETTER <devo>

Acts 1

Message > Hindi mo kailangang malaman ang timeline ni Lord. Kailangan mo lang magtiwala at maghintay sa Kanya > You should not brood over your losses, but you should look forward to your great future > Maganda ang future na para sa ‘yo. The Lord will give you back what you’ve lost, and it would be much better and greater than before > Ayaw ni Lord pag hindi ka nagmomove on > Hindi ka pababayaan ni Lord. Hindi siya papayag na wala kang kasama > The Lord gives instruction through the Holy Spirit to those He has chosen > The Lord brought and introduced His presence to you. Nasa ‘yo na kung tatanggapin mo o hindi > The Lord wants you to advance your steps and take your level higher > Alam ni Lord na may potensyal ka pang hindi mo nailalabas > Ayaw ni Lord na stagnant ka at walang ginagawa. He wants you to reach and show your full potential > Importanteng mag-unite constantly in prayer > Ang prayer ay hindi lang ginagawa mag-isa. You can pray the same prayer with others. > Uniting in prayer means one heart, one purpose, one God > Everything starts small, but it grows exponentially with God > Kailangan din ng leader na magga-guide at magli-lead > Your decisions should always be guided by the Lord > Si Lord ang nakakaalam ng puso ng bawat isa > The Lord chose you to be there for a reason > There is a job/responsibility that only you can do, and that you are only chosen for > Hindi ka nilagay sa pwesto ng ibang tao dahil may pwestong talagang para sa ‘yo > You are unique and there’s something only for you

Promise > “5 For John baptized with water, but in a few days you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.” -promise of baptism with the Holy Spirit > “8 But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” - promise of power in the Holy Spirit - promise of being a witness *witness = attestation of a fact or event; testimony > You, your life will be a testimony of God’s grace, God’s glory, God’s love

Command > 4 … “Do not leave Jerusalem, but wait for the gift my Father promised, which you have heard me speak about.”  > Don’t leave the kingdom of God, and have faith&hope in the Lord’s promise of eternal life > Don’t force to know the times and dates the Father has set by His own authority > Look forward, and move forward

Warning > Walang mangyayari kung walang gagalaw at magli-lead > Walang mangyayari sa ‘yo kung ‘di ka magmo-move on > Sinong magli-lead sa mga tao mo kung hindi ikaw? > If you don’t make yourself better, maiiwan ka > Kung magdadrama ka lang at magfofocus sa past, hindi ka makakagalaw > Matatakot ka lang magmove forward if you dwell in your past failures. Mananatili ka lang talunan > Pag ang decision, ‘di guided, malaki ang possibility na magfail > Pag pinipilit mo ang sarili mo sa bagay na para sa ‘yo, mahihirapan ka lang para sa wala > Pag tinatakbuhan mo ‘yung talagang para sa ‘yo, you won’t reach your full potential > What you do in your life becomes a testimony to others > Bulok ang fruit ng wicked at nagbebetray kay Lord > Walang natatanggap na matino ang pasaway > Ang pagserve kay Lord ay pangmatagala, ‘di panandalian

Application > ‘Wag magpapaniwala sa mga hula or whatever kung kailan ang end of the world, dahil si Lord lang ang nakakaalam > ‘Wag mong madaliin ang mga bagay-bagay. Lovelife sa tulad mong estudyante pa? Maaga pa! Gawin mo muna ang mga dapat mong gawin ngayon. Mag-aral kang mabuti > ‘Wag kang matakot magmove on. Break every negative mindset, especially about your future. ‘Wag kang sumuko ngayon pa lang dahil marami ka pang itetestify > Never think na nag-iisa ka. ‘Wag kang matakot. Maniwala kang kasama mo si Lord pag nasa bahay ka, gabi at wala pamilya mo. Magtext ka rin o makipagchat. ‘Wag ka ring magdrama > Listen to God’s instruction through the Holy Spirit. Seek. Magpakalunod ka sa Holy Spirit para marinig mo nang maayos ‘yung instructions ni Lord sa ‘yo *wink*  > Step forward. Step up. Level up. Be better that you are now. I-push mo pa. Sipagan mo pa. Gawin mo nang buong puso. Dapat pang-maximo na ang GWA mo next sems :P > Gumalaw ka. ‘Wag kang papatay-patay. ‘Wag kang tatamad-tamad. Ang gawin mo, ‘yung makabuluhan, ‘di ‘yung puro nood ng guilty crown or iba pang anime or movies. Try mo rin kaya mag-advanced reading? At asan na ‘yung pag-aaral mo dapat maggitara? Anyare? Hahahahahahahaha. Ayos-ayos din kasi. > Be faithful sa prayer meetings. Kung ‘di talaga pwede sa light ngayon, dapat walang absent sa destiny/sod :P > Pag prayer meeting, don’t go astray sa pinagpepray ng madla. Mag-“yes” and “amen” ka, Ang sarili mong prayers, ipagpray mo sa sarili mong prayer time, hindi sa prayer meetings. Pag sinabing one in prayer, unite in prayer > Lead your people. ‘Wag nang hiya-hiya. FC na kung FC. Maki-close ka rin kasi. I-push mo ‘yan! hahaha > Follow the Lord. Follow your leader. Tanggalin ang negative mindset. ‘Wag magpapadistract pag kausap mo sila. Makinig ka at magreact. ‘Wag kang phphleg-phleg. Sundin mo sinasabi nila. ‘Wag kang pasaway > Pray when you need to make a decision, lalo kung napakalaking decision niyan para sa buhay mo. Patulong ka rin sa leader mo. ‘Wag kang matakot macorrect. Maexcite kang maguide. > ‘Wag mong kwestyunin ang calling mo. Panindigan mo. Maniwala ka sa sarili mo. ‘Wag mong sayangin pagtitiwalang binigay sa ‘yo ni Lord > ‘Wag mong ipilit ang sarili mong gawin ang hindi para sa ‘yo. ‘Wag mong piliting maging ibang tao > Gandahan mo naman ang testimony mo. Be a testimony of God’s grace, not of wickedness. Live as a good testimony. Show people what God is doing in your life, not what the enemy is doing in your life. Dapat malakas maka-good vibes.

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Do you see a person wise in their own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for them.

Proverbs 26:12 NIV

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For you <devo>

Luke 24

Message

> The Lord is not among the dead, but among the living. He is among us

> Dapat maagap sa paggawa ng duties and responsibilities, hindi pamamaya nang pamamaya o pabukas nang pabukas

> There is something that only you can do, a responsibility that's only for you

> The word of the Lord makes us understand things that happened, are happening and will be happening

> Even women can be messengers of God

> You can be a messenger through simply sharing your testimony with heart and with passion

> Minsan kasama natin si Lord nang hindi natin namamalayan

> The Lord can show Himself to you as your friend, your teacher, your parent, etc.

> Minsan nagmomove si Lord sa buhay natin nang hindi natin napapansin

> Inaayos ni Lord buhay mo, wala kang dapat problemahin

> May vision si Lord para sa atin, para sa maganda at hopeful na future natin

> Ipaparealize ni Lord sa 'yo sa time na dapat mong marealize

> Hindi natin kayang gisingin ang sarili natin at iparealize sa sarili natin. It's the Lord who will make us realize, sometimes through other people

> The Lord will make you understand at the right time

> Pineprepare ka ni Lord para kayanin ang responsibility na para lang talaga sa 'yo. Ginagawa ka Niyang mas mature

> Hindi ka bibigyan ni Lord ng pressure/challenge na hindi mo kaya

> Overcoming challenges and problems make you better

> Binebless ni Lord ang mga sumusunod sa Kanya

> Magiging masaya ka kung winoworship mo si Lord nang buong puso

> Ang praise ay hindi saglitan lang. It is a lifestyle

Promise

> All the Lord's promises and words will come true, walang palya

> The Lord grants us peace

> The Lord will open our minds and make us understand at the right time

> 46 He said to them, "This is what is written: The Messiah will suffer and rise from the dead on the third day, 47 and repentance for the forgiveness of sins will be preached in His name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem. 48 You are witnesses of these things. 49 I am going to send you what my Father has promised; but stay in the city until you have been clothed with power from on high."

> Hindi mawawala ang blessing ni Lord

Command

> Remember His word and believe.

> Stay in God's presence

> Do what is assigned to you. Do you responsibility

Warning

+ Maooverwhelm ka kay Lord ;)

> Wala kang maiintindihan kung slow ka maniwala

> Maguguluhan ka kung wala kang pinanghahawakang word ni Lord at kung hindi mo talaga Siya kilala

> Matatakot ka kung hindi mo naiintindihan, kung hindi ka naniniwala

> Hindi ka mawawalan ng pressure, challenges at problems

Application

> Pray for people

> Gawin mo agad yung pinapagawa sa 'yo, kahit sino man yung nag-uutos sa 'yo except the devil malamang. 'Wag mong ipa-mamaya. 'Wag mong ipabukas. Pag sinabing gumawa ng project, gawin mo agad. 'Wag mong hintayin ang deadline tapos magccram ka. Pag may pinagawa sa 'yo sa bahay, gawin mo agad. 'Wag unahin ang paglalaro, panonood, pagbabasa ng hindi importante, pakikipagchat o pagtetext. Gawin mo rin agad 'yung mga pinagagawa sa 'yo ng leader mo. Pag sinebing magsend ng devo, magsend agad. Ayos-ayos din. :p

> Gawin mo kung ano'ng nakaassign sa 'yo. Sa 'yo lang nakasalalay 'yan. Is it to win your family? Or kahit part mo lang sa groupwork. Gaano man kaliit o kalaki, gawin mo kung ano'ng responsibility mo. Don't neglect. Don't do it half-heartedly.

> Pag nagshare ka ng testimony, lagyan mo ng puso, ng passion, ng excitement. Ipa-excite mo naman sila.

> Read the Bible. But don't read it para lang masabing nagbasa ka. Read it with a seeking heart. Do your devotions everyday. Open your heart to every revelation God will give you. Makinig din sa preachings (http://www.g12destiny.com/destiny-podcast lml xD), and take it seriously. 'Di naman 'yung serious na 'di ka na ngingiti or whatever, pero isapuso mo talaga. Hayaan mong baguhin ni Lord ang buhay mo.

> Never ever think that you're alone. Lagi mong isipin na kasama mo si Lord. Makipagfriends ka rin. 'Wag kang mahiya. Maraming taong willing. 'Wag kang matakot na mareject dahil kahit anong mangyari, may tatanggap sa 'yo

> Ipaubaya mo kay Lord 'yung buhay mo. 'Wag mo problemahin. Just do everything for Him

> Take hold of the vision God gave you. Panghawakan mo 'yan. Ask the Lord to let you see a glimpse of your great future. Look forward to it and be excited

> Let the Lord prepare you for your future. Harapin mo 'yung mga pagsubok. 'Wag mong tatakbuhan. Magpadisciple ka. Don't take pressure and correction negatively. Always think of it as something that would make you better. Kung pinagalitan ka, magsorry at magpasalamat ka. Always let yourself be guided by the Lord and by people following Him

> Give thanks and praise to the Lord. Worship Him with all your heart. 'Wag mong gawing palabas lang ang worship. I-honor mo talaga si Lord. Magpasalamat ka rin sa leaders and parents mo. Honor them. Respect them. 'Wag kang sasabat pag nagsasalita sila. 'Wag mo silang pagtataasan ng boses. Remove every negative mindset you have of them. Sundin mo mga pinapagawa nila. Know your limit sa pakikipaglokohan. Seryosohin mo pag seryoso sila sa 'yo.

> Hold on to God's word and His promises. Never lose hope. Never lose faith. Never let a ray of doubt slip in

> Always be in God's presence. Have a seeking heart. Ano man ang ginagawa mo, nasaan ka man, anong oras man, sino man ang kasama mo, kausapin mo si Lord mula sa puso at sabihin mo, "Lord, gusto ko kasama kita. Samahan Mo po ako ha."

> Don't let fear dwell in your heart. Isipin mo lagi na kasama mo si Lord at hindi ka Niya pababayaan. Always think that everything is happening according to His plan, a plan that's best for you

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Back to encounter <devo>

Luke 23

Message

> Sometimes we look like we're losing, but we're actually claiming victory

> There will always be people who understand you

> You need courage to stand up for your loved ones, people you understand and people who understand you

> Hindi ka magtatagumpay kung wala kang pinagdadaanan

> In the end, it's your decision that matters

> Minsan bibigyan ka ni Lord ng burden na wala sa sarili mong plano, pero nasa 'yo kung magtitiwala ka

> When you carry your responsibilities and burden from the Lord, you have to follow behind Him. Hindi mo Siya pwedeng pangunahan

> The Lord gave you responsibilities and blessings. 'Di mo na kailangang magpakasakit dahil Siya na ang gumawa nun para sa 'yo

> Even when you experience problems and challenges, there will always be people believing in you and following you if you are in the Lord

> 'Di lang ibang tao ang nangangailangan kay Lord. Kailangan mo rin Siya.

> Hindi ka maiimpluwensyahan kung hindi mo hahayaang maimpluwensyahan ka.

> The Lord didn't save Himself just to save us, just to save you.

> Is it possible na kaya ganyan 'yung inaasal mo kasi hindi mo naman talaga naiintindihan?

> Tingin ng marami, ang king ay nagpapakasasa lang at hindi nagseserve, pero ibang King si Lord

> Even criminals can be with God in paradise if they acknowledge that they have sinned, ask for forgiveness and truly accept Him

> Down to our last breath, with our everything, we should live our life for God

> Kailangan mong makilala si Lord bago mo Siya mabigyan ng praise na nararapat sa Kanya. Parang pagtanggal lang blindfold para makita at maappreciate mo 'yung surprise para sa 'yo

> Dapat gawin din nating exciting ang pagtanggal ng blindfold para sa iba ;)

> As a leader, you have to be the first to see and understand. Kailangan mo munang makita bago mo maipakita sa iba

> Hindi ka kinocondemn ni Lord

> Even as a woman, you can follow the Lord until the end.

> We have to stand firm for the Lord until the end

> It takes great courage and boldness to come for the Lord, and you have it!

> The Lord deserves the most elegant, the best.

> There's a place in your heart that only God can fill and occupy

> You are responsible in keeping the Lord's position in your heart

> The Lord is always faithful

Promise

1. Promise of understanding and intelligence

- The place where Jesus was crucified was called Skull. According to the dictionary, it also means a seat of understanding and intelligence

- Binigyan tayo ni Lord ng understanding para maintindihan 'yung meaning ng mga ginawa Niya

2. Promise of forgiveness

- Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."

- The Lord grants us forgiveness and the "ability" to forgive others

3. Promise of calling

- Jesus' clothes were divided by casting lots. Clothes are distinctive dresses of a profession or calling [dictionary].

- We have a calling from God, and it's by destiny that we receive that calling

4. Promise of salvation

- Jesus agreed in being with a criminal in paradise, for he acknowledged the Lord with all his heart

5. Promise of open heavens and experience with God

- The curtain in the temple separating people from the presence of God was torn.

Command

> Don't be depressed while the Lord is with you (forever)

Warning

> Sometimes we accuse others of sins we actually commit

> Minsan nagpapasahan na lang tayo kasi takot tayo magkamali

> Minsan humi-Herod tayo

    1. gustong makita at maexperience si Lord

    2. sobrang saya nang nakita at naexperience si Lord

    3. nag-expect kay Lord, at parang hindi agad namimeet yung expectations

    4. kinekwestyon si Lord pero hindi nasasagot

    5. lost faith and end up mocking Jesus

> We mock the Lord when we praise halfheartedly

> Our actions always expose our hearts, sometimes unconsciously

> Minsan mas gusto pa natin magkasala kaysa sumama kay Lord

> Sometimes pressure from people around us pushes us to sin

> Negative mindsets can destroy things, even when it's small, because it starts small

> Minsan 'di will ni Lord ang pinaiiral natin

> We can't face anything if we don't think that the Lord is with us

> Minsan nagkakasala tayo nang hindi natin napapansin

Application

> Always ask the Lord to expose your heart. Ask for forgiveness and repent

> Don't be depressed. Don't look down. Look forward to your victory with God

> Stand up for God

> Don't be scared to fail

> Rebuke familiarity. Always have great desire and awe for the Lord

> Praise the Lord with all your heart, no matter what your circumstance is

> Live for the Lord may nakatingin man sa 'yo o wala

> Be with people who really are in the Lord. Unite with His cause. Have compassion and bring people to Him

> Guard your heart. Layuan ang dapat layuan

> 'Wag magpadala sa pressure kung alam mo namang mali

> Check and correct your mindset about God and about your leader

> Know the Lord. Read the Bible. Do your devotions. Pray. Listen carefully to preachings. Open your heart for revelations

> Always let the Lord's will be done

> Don't run away from your responsibilities. Receive your calling

> Never lose hope. Never lose faith. 

> Pray for others. Pray for yourself

> Forgive those who have sinned against you, and ask for forgiveness for your sins. Don't condemn yourself

> Have courage and boldness for the Lord

> Give to the Lord not just your best, but the best He deserves

> Always keep the Lord, His words, His commands and His promises in your heart. Claim and obey.

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Ayos and linis mode.

Move on na tayo. I am changed. From a life full of emptiness and drama to a life full of hope, faith and blessings. I'm looking forward to tomorrow! :D

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Wise words from R. V. and family :DD

"People have the tendency to brand themselves." It's all about religion. Madalas daw dahil sa label na "Catholic" o "Born again", 'di na pwede. Nung tinanong siya kung ano religion niya, "They call it born again. Medyo protestant, medyo kung ano, pero basta I just follow what God says". Hindi nga naman kasi dapat maging hadlang ang religion sa pagkakaisa ng mga tao :D

"There is always a time for change." Pastor daw kasi tatay niya, strict, so straight. Mahigpit pagpapalaki sa kanya. Curfew, at parang nakatali. Tapos, bigla siyang "pumutok". He found his way "out" sa banda. Nalulong sa alak, sa babae, sa yosi. Sa pagtake ng drugs, "I can't say I did, I can't say I didn't." Nakikita raw niya mga kasama niya na nagddrugs, pero masyado raw siyang lasing para maalala kung nagtake siya o hindi, "so I won't say I did, and I won't say I didn't". Grumaduate daw siya ng business management major in electric guitar, pero God worked on him daw. God changed his life. Nakilala niya ang asawa niya, binawasan ang yosi at alak, at tumigil na sa pambababae. "From long hair to losing hair" xDD "I can't say na narealize kong tama 'yung tatay ko, kasi mali rin siya sa paghihigpit sa 'kin, pero ang masasabi ko narealize ko na tama si God." :D

"Train up a child." Actually galing daw 'to sa Proverbs 22. Dahil nga sa paghihigpit ng tatay niya, napunta dito 'yung usapan xD Child daw kasi kailangan bata pa lang ma-train na sila. Dahil daw mahirap nang i-train ang isang adult, kahit ang isang teenager. Kailangan daw medyo maluwag, pero may guidance pa rin. Sabi ng asawa niya, "Ang bata kasi parang sabon, pag masyadong mahigpit ang hawak mo, madudulas at matatanggal sa kamay mo, pero pag hindi ganoon kahigpit ang hawak mo, nandiyan pa rin siya sa kamay mo."

"Technology is both a curse and a blessing." Hindi nga naman kasi ito maipagkakaila. Blessing, kasi mas maraming natututunan ang bagong generation, at mas napapadali ang buhay. Mas marami nang kayang gawin ang mga tao. Curse kasi raw nagiging tamad na ang mga tao, at naririsk ang nature. Wala na ring mga batang naglalaro sa labas. Hinihila nga raw niya sa labas 'yung mga anak niya para maglaro kasi gusto raw niyang makita silang maputikan, madumihan at kung anu-ano pa xD

Last but not the least, "Fight for your dreams. Fight for your decision." Napunta kasi sa akin 'yung usapan, sa pagpunta ko sa UP Diliman. Tinanong niya ako kung 'yung decision kong 'yun, personal o influence ng friends. Sagot ko, personal decision ko. Well, nung una parang influence ng friends ang dahilan, pero ngayon, personal naman na xD Sabi niya panindigan ko raw kung ano decision ko, at huwag kong sisisihin parents ko kung nagfail ako sa sarili kong dreams, dahil desisyon ko 'yun. Dati raw ginusto niyang maging doctor, pero pinilit siya ng tatay niya na magbusiness xD Sabi raw nung tatay niya kung nagbusiness naman daw siya pwede siyang magpatayo ng ospital at maghire ng mga doctor xD Tinake daw niya 'yun, at narealize niyang tama ang tatay niya. Maganda na takbo ng business nila ngayon, at medyo malapit-lapit na rin siya sa pagpapagawa ng ospital xDD

Masaya. Inspiring. Galing. :)

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Within GOD is our true home :)

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Father, in Your arms I commit my Spirit.

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EH KASI GRADUATE NA KAMI!

Masaya pero nakakalungkot :)( xD

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Happy White Day :)

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Going to UP Diliman this Saturday for the college orientations. Sana kayanin ko maging independent sa Diliman. I'll really miss everyone, everything, pero para na rin sa future ko :)

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18 days before graduation

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Ako naman nagdadrama tungkol sa oras namin ngayon. Hahaha

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"WOW"

Bagong expression ng nagseselos xp