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Skyrim guard: wait…I know you

Me, 300 pounds over encumbered with stolen cheese wheels and solid dwemer metal, waddling by: you don’t know shit bitch

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Sailor Senshis + rainbow spectrum

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Petition for a novella solely about Lucien and Jesminda??

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I like books with romances that start off as fuck you then turns into fuck me

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TES OC Questionnaire

I saw a couple of these floating around and thought it’d be fun to do one for dear old Tat, so here we go! 

GENERAL • Name: Tatiana Claudia Vestalis • Alias(es): Laurentia Seius, a widower in County Cheydinhal • Nicknames/Titles:  Tat, to her friends and family, Hero of Kvatch and Champion of Cyrodiil.  Silencer in the “Lucien Lives” AU, and Listener in the canon timeline. • Gender: Female • Age: 26 upon her arrest and the start of Oblivion’s timeline, 28 upon joining the Dark Brotherhood. • Canon timeline: The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion • Race:  Human/Imperial • Birthsign:  Thief • Specialties:  Custom Class(okay, you got me.  i admit it.  she’s a stealth archer) • Religious beliefs:  Loosely worshiped the Divines, then briefly Nocturnal, and eventually turned bitter toward both daedra and aedra. • Preferred Weapon:  Umbra(or, after it’s stolen, an unenchanted Ebony shortsword or daedric dagger) and a daedric bow. • Favorite magic school:  None.  Save for minor light and healing spells, she doesn’t use magic • Place of birth:  Imperial City, Cyrodiil • Sexual orientation:  Heterosexual • Occupation: Dark Brotherhood Assassin: Silencer in the “Lucien lives” AU, Listener in canon timeline

APPEARANCE • Eye color: Dark blue • Hair color/length: Medium blonde, long. • Typical hair style:  Braided or in a low bun • Complexion:  Fair, slight freckling on her shoulders • Height: 5′3″ • Scars: Several small ones; the curved one on her brow/temple and one across her right hip are the largest and most notable • Burns: None of note • Body type/weight:  Athletic/toned, but average build overall.  

FAVOURITE • Color: red, black, and blue • Hair color:  Blonde and black • Eye color:  Blue • Entertainment:  Horse racing, writing really terrible poetry, and hiking/walks in the woods • Pastime: Weapons training/exercising, horseback riding, cleaning/honing her weapons.  yikes she’s boring lmao  • Food: She loves fish, poultry, and practically any kind of vegetable.  Also sweet rolls. • Drink: Water, milk. • Books: Historical accounts and how-to books.  She isn’t into fiction.   HAVE THEY • Been a member of any guilds:  Yes.  She was in the Thieves’ Guild prior to the Oblivion Crisis, and after it ended, she joined the Dark Brotherhood. • Had sex: Yes • Had sex in public:  Nah, she isn’t into that.  Privacy is very important to her in that sense. • Gotten drunk:  Once in her late teens.  It was messy and her coin purse went missing.  Never again. • Used skooma/moonsugar:  Nope.  But she’s stolen and fenced both several times. • Gotten pregnant:  Nope • Kissed a man: Yes • Kissed a woman: No • Gotten tattoos: No • Gotten piercings: No • Had a broken heart: Yes, in her early twenties. • Been in love: Yes • Stayed up for more than 24 hours: Many times!  As a thief, she made good money pulling all-nighters, and when working to stop the Oblivion Crisis, she often didn’t have a choice.  She has more flexibility as an assassin and takes full advantage of it.  She won’t stay up unless she has to.

ARE THEY • A virgin:  lol, no • A cuddler:  not especially • A kisser:  definitely. • A smoker:  Nope.  She detests the smell of smoke. • Scared easily: She’s verrrrrry uneasy around dogs and spiders. • Jealous easily:  She was once jealous of her sister, but has since worked through it.  Jealousy/Envy is definitely not her Deadly Sin. • Trustworthy:  Whenever she can afford to be.  Y'know, being an assassin and all. • Dominant:  Yep.  She can work with/under people, but truly enjoys being in charge and giving orders. • Submissive:  Generally?  Not if she can help it.  In bed?  She’s a switch. • Single:  Depends on the timeline; in canon, yes, no in the Lucien Lives AU

OTHER QUESTIONS • Have they harmed themselves:  Unintentionally, yes; over the years, she’s gotten numerous cuts, bruises, etc during training and falling off horses.   • Thought of suicide: Yes, during her sentence in the Imperial Prison; in the canon timeline, after Lucien’s murder. • Attempted suicide: No; she escaped prison after Uriel Septim and his Blades went through her cells. • Wanted to kill someone: Yes. • Actually killed someone:  Generally, assassins do kill people every now and then lmao. • Ridden a horse: It’s one of her favorite hobbies and also her preferred means of transportation. • Have/had a job:  Like…a formal job?  Well, she was a stablehand in a public livery when she was a teen/young adult, which she used to supplement her income from her Thieves’ Guild runnings.  Eventually became an assassin for the Dark Brotherhood. • Have any fears: Being betrayed, spiders, going back to prison,  S P I D E R S.

FAMILY • Sibling(s): Antonia Vestalis, her twin sister.  Alive, highly ranked Thieves Guild member.  Lives in the Imperial City. • Parents:  Claudio and Aurelia Vestalis.  Alive and both living in the Imperial City.  Claudio, a master alchemist.  Aurelia, a housewife and painter. • Children:  None • Pets: A lean chestnut gelding prior to her arrest, and later, she receives Shadowmere from Lucien.

Tagging @powerovernothing, @grimweaver, and @enohlaalus, but you totally don’t have to do it if you don’t want to!

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Okay but imagine: Doctor Who/ACOTAR mashup

*The inner circle arrives at the spring court*

Rhysand: I have a message and a question. A message from the Night Court, and a question from me. WHERE. IS. MY. WIFE.

Tamlin: What is the Night Court’s message

*Tamlin’s castle blows up in the distance*

Rhys: Would you like me to repeat the question

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Rhysand is literally the hardest person to fan cast. Every time I try all I can picture is his fan art. I hope the movie gets him right. u.u

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I totally thought I would grow up to be like Harry or Ron or Hermione but now I’m pretty sure I ended up like Filch, cranky, rude, antisocial, and in love with my cat u.u

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Imagine this:

Lucien is still alive when the Hero arrives at Applewatch. Imagine him hanging there, flayed and torn to pieces, seeing through blurry bloodshed eyes his Silencer storming in with evidence proving his innocence in their hands. Imagine him wanting to smile despite the agonizing pain, despite literally missing half of his face. Imagine him taking his last breaths feeling proud of his loyal Silencer, who, by the looks on their face, hurried to Applewatch like it was their life on the line and not his. Imagine him slipping into darkness as Sithis’s cold grip drags him into the Void and yet feeling triumphant over the Black Hand as the last thing he sees is the horror in Mathieu Belamont’s eyes. Lucien dies feeling avenged, knowing that the Traitor’s punishment will be much more worse than his. He dies knowing that even though his dear Silencer didn’t make it in time, they were on his side till the very end.

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Gorgeous

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Me: *plays a new videogame* I will NOT get attached to a character

Videogame character: hey.

Me: shit.

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I didn’t know how much I needed this until now

What I want in the ACOTAR teaser trailer:

*quick shots of feyre drawing her bow

Close up of her eyes with the arrow drawn.

Close up of the wolf’s oddly humane eyes.

Screen goes blac as you hear the deafening sound of an arrow being released.

*voice over*

“You owe me a debt.”

Feyre and her family in their cottage looking at something behind the camera.

Another close up of Tamlins beast form and maybe a shadow looming over them.

Screen goes black again.

“What kind of debt?” Fear coats her every word.

Shots throughout the movie that leave you on the edge of your seat.

Violet eyes looking up.

Naga bounding for her.

Shots of a shirtless Tamlin with his mask.

And maybe Lucien.

Red lips curving into a wicked grin as a haunting laugh echoes through the chamber.

And a split second shot of feyre suspended in the air by amarantha, screaming.

“A life debt.” Said with such conviction as Tamlins face turns to look at Feyre behind the camera.

And of course with edge of your seat music accentuating the urgentnessand mystery and danger of the Fey world.

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This is perfect. They better be mates!

The next SJ Maas book in a nutshell

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This is totally Rhys. Fight me.