angelsglitch

[angelsglitch]

ITS NOT LIKE I LIKE U

mean!reader x loser!ellie highschool au

summary: youre popular and it's safe to say you dont want losers like ellie coming to the best party of the year. but maybe the reason you dont want her there isnt the reason you would expect.

warnings: swearing, drug use, accidental attempted murder?

lowercase intended

pink - you

green - ellie

blue - other characters

one - see u saturday two - my little loser three - knew you hadn’t changed

after you and ellies conversation, you both agreed to be fine with eachother, and after a while you two actually became friends

days pass, and ellie finds herself growing closer to you. the initial hostility and awkwardness has faded, replaced by a comfortable friendship. she starts sitting with you at lunch, much to the shock of the other students.

during lunch, dina approaches your table with a curious look.

"hey, can i talk to you two for a sec?" she says

she glances between you and ellie, her expression serious.

“yeah?” you reply

ellie nods, putting down her sandwich.

"i just wanted to know what's going on here. you two are hanging out a lot lately. has me wondering if the worlds gonna blow up"

“we made up, obviously. and im not friends with my friends anymore so yeah.”

dina raises an eyebrow, surprised by your bluntness.

"just like that? you're done with them?"

“well pretty much.”

dina sits down, still processing the information. "and you're cool with ellie now? the nerd?"

you laugh “you could put it that way.”

ellie rolls her eyes at dina's comment, but there's a hint of amusement in her expression. "thanks for the vote of confidence dina."

"i'm just saying, it's a bit unexpected. you both were always so... different."

“yeah i know i didn’t like her but ive matured.”

dina looks at you thoughtfully, then at ellie. "well, i'm glad you're both getting along. it's nice to see the two of you happy.”

“thanks.” you smile

ellie smiles softly, feeling a sense of acceptance from dina. she bumps her shoulder against yours playfully.

"yeah, thanks for not being a total jerk anymore."

“okay okay.”

dina chuckles and stands up. "i'll leave you two to your nerd stuff then."

“okay im not a nerd.” you say defensively

ellie snorts. "sure, keep telling yourself that."

“dude.”

ellie grins mischievously.

"what? you hang out with the most ‘nerdy’ person in school now."

“yeah yeah.” you nudge her shoulder

she nudges you back, her eyes sparkling with humor.

-

ellie come to your house after school to chill, she arrives, carrying her backpack and a comic book.

"hey, thanks for letting me come over."

“it’s fine.” you smile

ellie looks around, taking in the fancy surroundings. she shifts uncomfortably.

"your house is... really nice."

“eh not really.”

she raises an eyebrow skeptically. "not really? it's like a mansion compared to my place."

“aw no need to be insecure.” you pat her back jokingly.

ellie blushes slightly at your touch, but tries to play it cool.

"i'm not insecure, just stating facts. some of us have to work for our stuff."

“right.”

she follows you inside, still looking around curiously.

"so, what do you usually do when you're not being popular and mean?"

“uh. have parties.”

ellie snorts again.

"of course you do. let me guess, with all your popular friends?"

“ex friends.”

she sits down on your couch, crossing her legs.

"right, right. well, now you have me."

“yeah.” you give her a sarcastic smile

ellie opens her comic book, trying to act casual.

"so, do you have any other nerdy friends i should know about?"

“yknow i’ve never heard a nerd refer to themselves as a nerd.”

she looks up from her comic, slightly defensive.

"well, i can accept it because it's true. i am a nerd. and you're sitting here with me, so what does that make you?"

“suicidal.”

ellie rolls her eyes again, but there's a hint of concern in her expression. "very funny. seriously though, you can't just hang out with me and then act like you're above it all."

“well i am. well i was.”

she puts down her comic, giving you a serious look.

"dude, you're not above anything. you're just a person who's been through some shit and is trying to figure things out. and guess what? that's okay."

your cat walks over to ellie and sits on her lap

ellie's face lights up as the cat snuggles against her. she gently pets it, a small smile forming.

"hey there, little buddy. you're a cute one."

the cat starts purring, clearly enjoying the attention. ellie looks at you with a soft expression.

"what's its name?"

“kevin.”

she laughs lightly, scratching behind kevin's ears.

"kevin? pretty human name for a cat."

kevin rolls onto his back, demanding belly rubs. ellie obliges, still smiling.

"he's really friendly. y’know joel has a cat too, her name is squirrel."

“cute.” you say smiling looking at your cat with ellie.

ellie nods, continuing to pet kevin.

"yeah, she's adorable. she's a rescue too, joel found her on the street."

your dad comes downstairs, to grab a drink “hi amy-” he says to ellie, then double takes noticing it’s not herz “oh. you’re not amy” he speaks, looking confused since he’s never seen ellie before

ellie tenses up slightly, feeling awkward under your dad's gaze.

"uh, no, i'm not amy. i'm ellie."

“dad i told you im not friends with amy anymore.”

your dad rubs his forehead, clearly still confused. "right, right sorry darling. my apologies ellie. it's nice to meet you. i'm this annoying one’s dad."

ellie awkwardly waves, still petting kevin.

"nice to meet you too, sir."

you burst out laughing “sir?”

you go into a fit of laughter and ellie shoots you a glare, her cheeks turning red in embarrassment.

"shut up, i'm being polite."

your dad chuckles as well, amused by the interaction.

"well, i'll leave you two to it. just don't do anything i wouldn't do."

he walks back upstairs, leaving you and ellie alone again. she's still blushing.

"your dad seems... nice."

“he’s okay.” you say trying to catch your breath

she nods, still feeling a bit embarrassed.

"he's definitely not like your ex-friends' parents."

“yep..”

she leans back on the couch, looking more comfortable now that your dad is gone.

"i guess that's a good thing though. you need better people in your life."

-

after a while it’s time for ellie to go home she stands up, reluctantly handing kevin back to you. he meows wanting to go back to ellie.

"i should probably head out. it's getting late."

“oh.. yeah.” you reply sounding disappointed

she grabs her backpack and slings it over her shoulder.

"i had... fun. surprisingly."

“i was just about to say that.”

she smirks, a hint of playfulness in her eyes.

"don't get used to it. i still think you're annoying."

“oh righhttt.”

she rolls her eyes, but there's a hint of a smile on her face.

"just don't forget it princess. i'll see you tomorrow at school."

“bye.” you lean in for a hug reluctantly not knowing if she’ll return it

ellie hesitates for a moment, clearly surprised by your gesture. she awkwardly hugs you back, patting your back.

"bye, sugar plum."

“bye freak.”

-

ellie walks into school, spotting you by your locker. she approaches with her usual confident stride, a comic book in hand.

she leans against the locker next to yours, opening the comic.

"good morning, sunshine. ready for another day of pretending to care about school?"

“ew.” you say looking at her then shutting your locker revealing some of your old friends behind you.

ellie raises an eyebrow, noticing your old friends. she glances at them with mild disinterest.

"ah, the sheep have come to greet their former queen."

“why are you seriously still speaking to her” one of them say to you.

ellie crosses her arms, unfazed by their comment.

"oh, i'm sorry. is my presence bothering you? maybe you should run along and find someone else to worship."

“i thought you weren’t friends with them anymore anyway?” she says turning to you.

“we made up.” you reply

ellie snorts in disbelief.

"made up? really? you're choosing them over me?"

you give her a not caring shrug and walk away, your friends laugh and follow behind you as one spits their gum at her.

ellie watches you go, her expression hardening. she clenches her jaw, feeling a mix of anger and disappointment.

"typical. i should've known better than to think you'd actually change." she mutters under her breath as she walks away, clutching her comic book tightly.

"what a waste of time."

during lunch, she sits alone at a table, scrolling through her phone and trying to ignore the stares from your friends who keep glancing over at her. she scoffs and gets up abruptly and walks away.

she heads to the library, finding a quiet corner to hide in. she pulls out her sketchbook and starts drawing, trying to distract herself from the events of the morning.

dina and jesse walk over to ellie “what up smellie ellie? where’s your bestie today?” jesse says

ellie looks up from her sketchbook, annoyance clear on her face.

"not in the mood, jesse. and she's not my bestie anymore."

“uh why” dina asks.

ellie sighs heavily, putting her pencil down.

"she decided to go back to her old friends. apparently i'm not good enough for her anymore."

“c’mon, we all knew that would happen, you seriously think a girl like that could change, she’s too far gone” dina says

ellie nods slowly, a bitter look on her face

"yeah… yeah i know. i was just stupid enough to believe she actually cared."

“it’s fine anywway, jesse and i were starting to think we lost our best friend” dina laughs

“i thought i lost you guys.”

jesse grins and ruffles ellie's hair.

"nah, we still got you, nerd."

ellie rolls her eyes at jesse's gesture, but a small smile tugs at the corners of her mouth.

"you're such an idiot."

“but hey, why don’t we teach her a lesson not to hurt people’s feelings?” dina suggests

ellie looks intrigued, her eyes narrowing slightly.

"what did you have in mind?"

“i don’t know, throw paint on her or like a gallon of apple juice..” dina says trailing off

jesse laughs, clearly amused by the idea. "i like where your head's at dina. but maybe we should do something more... creative?

“i like the apple juice scheme.” ellie says nodding to herself

dina smirks, high-fiving ellie. "apple juice it is then. let's make sure it's extra sticky."

“okay but- guys this isn’t a movie, where do we get that? and doesn’t this make us just as bad as she is?” jesse says.

ellie shrugs, her expression hardening again.

"she hurt me first, jesse. and we can get it from the cafeteria. they have those big containers of juice."

“fair enough, but don’t involve me till you’ve got the shit. im not going down from being caught stealing from school aswell as her wrath.” jesse sighs

dina chuckles and pats jesse's back. "you're such a coward jesse. but fine, we'll handle it ourselves."

he chuckles and walks off

“pussy.”

ellie and dina exchange knowing glances, already plotting their next move. the both of them agree to do the plan tomorrow so they head to the cafeteria to get the juice.

they wait until after school, making sure no one else is around. ellie grabs a large container of apple juice from the kitchen area.

"this should be enough to really piss her off."

“help me carry it” ellie says as dina looks at it

dina grabs the other side of the container, struggling a bit under its weight.

"fuck, this is heavier than i thought. how are we gonna pull this off without getting caught?"

ellie glances around nervously, her heart racing with excitement and a hint of guilt.

"we'll just have to be quick and quiet. and we need to find the perfect spot to dump it."

“we need it to be somewhere that we know she walks by every day”

ellie thinks for a moment, then snaps her fingers.

"i got it. the hallway outside her locker. she always goes there before her every class."

“oh yeah, we have to be there before she is so we have time to prepare to put it up then push it and shit”

ellie nods at dina , readjusting her grip on the container.

"right. we'll need to set it up so it pours right on her. maybe we can prop it up with something."

“yeah. text jesse and say we have it.”

ellie pulls out her phone and quickly texts jesse.

| ellie: we got the juice 💪 meet us by the lockers tomorrow morning.

jesse responds almost immediately.

| jesse: "got it. be careful you two. don't get caught.”

-

ellie gets home and sits on her couch, sparking a blunt

she takes a deep drag, letting the smoke fill her lungs as she leans back against the cushions, her mind racing with anticipation for tomorrow's prank.

her phone buzzes, it’s a text from you.

| you: im sorry

ellie stares at the message, her heart skipping a beat. she considers not responding, but her curiosity gets the better of her.

| ellie: what do u want

| you: i really didn’t mean for that to happen, i was speaking to them about something completely unrelated and they just asked to be friends again

ellie scoffs, taking another hit from her blunt.

| ellie: sure whatever. you should've known better than to hang out with them again. especially after everything they did to me.

| you: i’ve done bad stuff to you too so what’s the difference

ellie pauses, feeling a pang of guilt at your words. she takes a moment to collect her thoughts before typing back.

| ellie: you're right. you've been an asshole too. but at least you're not pretending to be my friend anymore.

| you: you didn’t answer the question

ellie sighs, frustration building up inside her.

| ellie: the difference is that i trusted u. i thought you were different from them. but clearly i was wrong. knew you hadn’t changed.

| you: u are my friend ellie.

ellie's grip on her phone tightens, her emotions conflicting. she wants to believe you, but the hurt is still fresh.

| ellie: friends don't abandon each other. friends don't let others bully their friends. you did both. so no, im not.

| you: i was just scared. im sorry

your text bubbles come up again then stop.

ellie feels a mix of anger and sadness as she reads your apology. she wants to believe that you were scared, but it's hard to trust you again.

| ellie: scared of what? being alone? or just being a coward??

| you: both

ellie takes a deep breath, her fingers hovering over the screen as she contemplates her response.

| ellie: u should've thought about that before u chose their side. i can't just forget what happened.

| you: i know i know. i just hope u can find it in ur heart to forgive me

ellie hesitates, her walls still up but feeling a small crack in her resolve.

| ellie: idk if i can. it's gnna take more than just an apology

| you: i know. i’ll figure something out. you’re still my favourite girl

ellie looks at your message, goes to type a reply then puts her phone down.

she stares at the ceiling, her mind racing with conflicting emotions. she's touched by your words, but also frustrated that you're still trying to win her back.

she sighs and goes to get a shower

the hot water runs over her body as she tries to clear her head. she thinks about your apology and the upcoming prank, wondering if it's all worth it.

she tries to forget about it all for the night and goes ro sleep. she sees dina waiting for ellie as she pulls up to school

-

dina is leaning against a tree, scrolling through her phone. she looks up and waves when she sees ellie approaching.

"hey, you're here early."

dina notices the tired look on ellie's face and raises an eyebrow. "everything okay? you look like you didn't sleep well."

ellie shrugs and walks over to dina, rubbing her eyes.

"just had a lot on my mind. ready to get this shit started.?"

"oh yeah, we're definitely ready. jesse is waiting by the lockers."

ellie takes the container and checks the contents, a smirk forming on her lips.

"great. let's go set this up."

the two girls walk towards the school entrance, spotting jesse already in position near the lockers. he gives them a thumbs up as they approach.

"morning ladies. everything's ready to go."

ellie smiles as she feels a tinge of guilt doing this especially since you tried to apologise her yesterday but she shoves it aside because she’s still hurt.

dina notices ellie's hesitation and nudges her gently.

"you okay, ellie? you seem a bit off."

ellie forces a smile and shakes her head.

"i'm fine. let's just do this."

“right for the record you guys are realllyyyy sure about this?” jesse asks them for the 5th time

ellie rolls her eyes at jesse's question.

"yes, jesse. we've been over this. it's harmless and she deserves it."

“i know she like chose her old friends over you and all and that sucks but i just think shit like this only really happens in those like old 2000s tv shows like were probably gonna get suspended, is it actually worth it for like two seconds of satisfaction?” he rambles.

dina groans and facepalms.

"jesse, seriously? you're such a fucking buzzkill. we're not going to get suspended. it's just a prank."

jesse crosses his arms, still looking skeptical.

"i just don't want to get in mess again. last time we pulled a ‘prank’, we had to clean entire gym for a month, im not doing that shit again."

ellie sighs and puts a hand on jesse's shoulder.

"look, if you're really that worried, you can bail. but dina and i are doing this. we've got a plan and we're sticking to it."

“okay but like, now she’s back friends with her little minions isn’t she like even scarier? and her brothers.. oh god her brothers are gonna assassinate our souls” he says pacing up and down

dina laughs at jesse's dramatics. "calm down, drama queen. we can handle her and her friends. besides, they're not going to do anything too extreme."

“whatever, i am nottt apart of this. you two have fun” he says walking off throwing his hands up in surrender.

ellie watches him leave, shaking her head.

“pussy.”

“anyways… jesse tied this rope to it so we can just let go of it and it’ll fall right onto her from up there” dina says.

ellie looks up at the rope, then at the position they need to be in.

"right that’s fine. we'll just have to wait for her to walk by and then let go."

dina and ellie then wait for you to enter school and grab something from your locker

-

ellie can see you approaching from a distance, chatting with your friends. she grips the rope tightly, her heart racing with anticipation. she sees you starting to open your locker.

dina nudges ellie, signaling that it's time.

"she's almost here. get ready."

ellie takes a deep breath and counts down quietly.

“three... two... one...”

on cue, ellie and dina let go of the rope, watching as the bucket of juice starts to fall.

the bucket hits you right on the head, drenching you in juice. your friends scream and back away as you stand there, stunned and covered in sticky liquid.

you gasp.

ellie and dina burst into laughter, trying to hide behind a nearby pillar.

your friends look around frantically, trying to figure out who did it. you wipe some juice off your face, your expression a mix of shock and anger.

“amy, stacy, get me tissues now”

amy and stacy quickly rush to grab tissues from the nearby bathroom, while ellie and dina continue to snicker behind their hiding spot.

you burst into tears and your other friends hug you.

ellie's hushed laughter stops abruptly as she sees you crying. she feels a pang of guilt but quickly pushes it down, telling herself it's just a harmless prank.

one of your friends gasps and wipes some juice off your arm and smells it, she gasps again “it’s apple juice.” she says to you and your mouth drops open.

dina's eyes widen at the revelation. she looks at ellie, who looks slightly guilty now

“shit. she figured it out.”

“im fucking allergic to apple juice!” you say and burst out crying again trying to wipe off the juice with your hands.

ellie's face pales as she realizes the severity of the situation. she had no idea you were allergic to apple juice.

"wait, what? what the fuck is she talking about?"

“dude? did you know she was allergic to apple juice?” ellie asks dina. “yeah? i thought that was the whole point?” dina whispers back.

ellie feels a wave of panic wash over her. she can hear you sobbing and your friends trying to calm you down.

"no, no, no... i just thought it was a harmless prank. i didn't know she could actually get hurt.”

ellie watches as you start to have a reaction, your face getting redder and your breathing becoming labored.

"we need to do something. she's going into anaphylactic shock." dina says

ellie steps out from behind the pillar, her hands shaking. "i'll get the nurse. someone call an ambulance!"

she runs towards the nurse's office, feeling completely responsible for what's happening.

ellie bursts into the nurse's office, panting heavily.

"ellie? what's going on?" the nurse asks trying to calm her down

"she's having an allergic reaction to apple juice. she's in the hallway."

a few teachers come running out and the principal looks confused “uh- i- is she okay? why’s there juice all over the floor oh my goodness” the principal says frantically.

the principal's eyes widen as he sees the state you're in. "get her to the infirmary now! and for the love of god somebody clean this mess up!"

ellie feels the weight of the situation crushing her as she watches the teachers rush to help you.

the nurse quickly assesses your condition and begins administering medication. "she's going to be okay, but we need to get her to the hospital for further treatment."

ellie stands frozen, guilt eating away at her as she watches the ambulance arrive.

the ambulance takes you away, and the principal turns to ellie with a stern expression. "ellie, come to my office. now."

ellie follows the principal to his office, her heart racing. she knows she's in deep trouble.

"sit down, ellie. i need to know what happened."

ellie sits in the chair, her hands trembling as she looks down at her lap.

"do you know why she was covered in apple juice and having a severe allergic reaction?"

ellie takes a deep breath deciding to just be honest, her voice barely above a whisper.

"i... i was the one who put the juice in the bucket. it was supposed to be a prank."

the principal's face turns red with anger trying to keep his professionalism.

"a prank? you could have seriously hurt her ellie! that poor girl’s in the hospital because of you."

ellie feels tears stinging her eyes, but she tries to hold them back.

"i'm calling her parents and your guardians. you're suspended for the rest of the week, and i'll be discussing this with the board."

ellie nods numbly, her mind racing with thoughts of what joel and tommy will say when they find out.

"and ellie, this is a serious matter. i hope you've learned your lesson."

the principal dismisses her, and ellie slowly walks out of the office, feeling like the weight of the world is on her shoulders.

ellie walks past your locker seeing it’s half open since you didn’t get to close it properly after putting your stuff in there. she opens it and flowers fall out. the label has your hand writing written on it, it reads ‘to ellie i’m sorry’ with a heart drawn next to it.

ellie's eyes widen as she sees the flowers and the note. her heart sinks even further, realizing the true nature of your relationship with her.

"oh god... what the fuck have i done?” she whispers

she carefully picks up the flowers, her hands shaking as she reads the note.

ellie's vision blurs with tears as she reads the note. she feels a pang of regret and guilt stronger than before.

“she... she really was trying to apologize to me. and i almost nearly fucking killed her."

she clutches the flowers to her chest, the realization of her actions hitting her like a ton of bricks.

ellie slides down to the floor, the flowers still in her hands. she buries her face in them, sobbing quietly.

"i'm such an idiot. i thought she was just another popular liar, but she was... she was being genuine."

she mutters, feeling like the biggest jerk in the world.

she realises she’s suspended so she should probably head home for the day, but ellie doesn't move. she stays there, lost in her thoughts and guilt.

"i have to make this right. i have to find a way to apologize to her and make sure she's okay." she thinks to herself.

taglist: @vahnilla

[angelsglitch]

texting loser!ellie that you have nipple piercing in class 6

nerdy loser!ellie x popular mean fem!reader

bored in english, you reply to a girl named E you’ve been talking to on an anonymous gay dating app—without knowing it’s that lesbian nerd girl, ellie williams.

masterlist

The library is almost empty.

Outside the glass study room, someone coughs. A printer whirs. But inside, it’s quiet — except for the soft clack of keys, the hum of the AC, and Ellie reading beside you.

“You pushed her on the wall,” she murmurs, brows drawing together. “Firm but not harsh, crashing your lips to her aching ones.”

You watched her mouth move as she read it — her lips tugging slightly as she focused, lashes low, the slope of her nose catching light — and something in your chest twisted. Not just from nerves. You hated the way her voice sounded reading your words. Hated that it made your pulse trip up. Hated that it made you want her to keep going.

“She pulled you into her lap as she sat on a large sealed paint bucket… her breath was—”

Ellie paused, frowning at the screen.

Then she turned to you with that look — the you’re insufferable and I regret partnering with you look.

“What is this?” she asked flatly, like the words on the doc personally offended her.

You leaned back in your chair, raising your eyebrows. “That’s the scene for chapter eight.”

“No, it’s not.” She shook her head and closed your laptop halfway like she was trying to censor it. “We’re not doing this. Again.”

You blinked at her, mock-offended. “Why the fuck not?” Your voice came out low — quieter than you meant, like you were actually trying to convince her.

Ellie sighed through her nose, dragging her laptop toward her and reopening your shared doc. Her fingers started typing with a little too much force. “Because we have an outline. You know — the thing we agreed on? The story structure? Remember that? We agreed to that.”

“Ellie.” You said her name before you could stop yourself. It landed softer than you intended — breathy, almost pleading.

“We don’t always have to follow the outline,” you continued, recovering fast. “This is just a little detour. A fun one.”

“They’ve been dancing around each other for pages. It’s driving me insane. This scene gives them something to feel while they keep holding back. That tension? It makes everything after hit harder.”

Ellie stopped typing. Her jaw moved slightly.

“It’s not time for them to hook up yet.”

She said it like a command. Like you were out of line for even thinking about it.

“They’re not hooking up. They’re making mistakes. That’s the point. It’s human.”

Ellie turned her head, meeting your eyes. Something in her expression sharpened — not anger exactly, but frustration. Or maybe panic, if you knew her better.

“No,” she said again, quieter this time. “We have a clear structure. Adding this here would change everything.”

You exhaled slowly, trying not to snap.

“Can’t we bend the structure, just a little? I know sometimes I add and suggest ridiculous shit, but I meant this one. I actually took my time writing that part. It’s ten pages, Ellie. Ten. And that’s not even the only scene — there’s more after.”

Ellie’s fingers froze on the keyboard. She turned slightly, not looking at you.

“Exactly,” she muttered. “More scenes. More changes. We didn’t agree to that.”

Ellie just shook her head like she was already done with the conversation before it even finished.

You opened your mouth to argue again, but her voice came in before you could.

“We’re not writing that scene.”

You stared at her, irritated. And something else you didn’t want to name.

She was so closed off, so composed, so good at not looking at you — like she could will herself into not caring.

“I’m serious about this, you know,” you said, voice quieter this time. “For real.”

Ellie finally up. “Yeah,” she said, expression unreadable. “So am I.”

She leaned back slightly, hands folding over her laptop like she was about to launch into a TED Talk.

“And if you actually looked at Ms. Alvarez’s notes, you’d see that the next three chapters are supposed to lay the groundwork for the second act. If we drop in a random paint-bucket hookup scene now, it kills the emotional pacing. It shifts the arc. It makes the tension collapse too early.”

You rolled your eyes like you were done and you’d already tuned her out. You crossed your arms and sank deeper into your chair, leaning back with the kind of defiance that wasn’t loud, but said we’re done here.

“I’m not working with you right now.”

“You’re being childish,” she muttered, eyes still locked on her screen.

“And you’re being a killjoy,” you shot back. “Not everything has to be some perfect, structured literary masterpiece, Ellie. Sometimes stories need chaos.”

You huffed, sitting up straighter now. “And for Ms. Alvarez’s notes? You know we could work something around that. It’s not impossible.” Your voice dropped, flat and clipped. “Just say you think my idea’s dumb and be done with it.”

She shook her head once, actually confirming it now. Yeah. Your idea was dumb. Dumb enough to mess with her masterpiece.

“You just want them to make out in a janitor’s closet.”

“Maybe I do.” You weren’t even sure if you were talking about your characters anymore. “Maybe it’s the only thing keeping me from screaming right now.”

Ellie finally looked up. Her eyes narrowed, scanning your face — trying to figure out how serious you were. That maybe.. maybe something had slipped out that shouldn’t have.

But then her lips twitched. Not quite a smile. More like a smirk that died halfway — crooked and careless.

“Jesus. Did you get your period or something?”

She said it offhand, careless. The kind of thing she wouldn’t even register as a real insult — but you did.

You stared at her. Your chest tightened, something sharp pulling inside.

“Wow,” you muttered. “Misogyny in 2025. Groundbreaking.”

Ellie bit her cheek, clearly holding back a laugh.

“I’m just saying—”

“Don’t.” Your voice dropped, dead flat.

She tried not to smile. You saw it anyway — the twitch of her mouth, like your anger was somehow amusing.

You wanted to slap it off her face.

“You’re overreacting,” she said under her breath.

“Overreacting my ass,” you snapped. “I took my whole weekend writing that scene, Ellie.”

She shrugged, turning back to her laptop. She was casual and dismissive. It kinda hurt you a little bit, almost.

“You could’ve told me first before you wrote it.”

“You’d have disagreed.”

“Exactly. But at least I could’ve stopped you from wasting your time.”

That one landed. You flinched. It showed in your hands — the way they clenched as you stood and yanked your bag up from the floor.

“You know what?” You laughed, bitter and breathless. “Fine. I don’t fucking care.”

You shoved your laptop into your bag, fast, messy.

“And yeah — I actually just wasted my time. Sorry for not reaching the standards, boss.”

You zipped the bag halfway, then gave up on aligning it at all.

“I don’t wanna work with you right now. I wanna go home — so I will.”

Ellie sighed quietly and shook her head, still typing.

You moved around the table and paused beside her, waiting for something. A glance. A smart-ass comment. Maybe even a shitty little “sorry.” Nothing.

She didn’t even look at you.

God.

You exhaled hard. “Okay. Great talk,” you muttered. “Text me if you decide to not be a dick. Or don’t. Whatever. I don’t care.”

You turned your back — done, or at least pretending to be — but something inside you snapped before you could walk away. You spun back around, heat burning in your chest.

“And you know what? I take back everything I said about you being easy to work with. You’re not. You don’t actually consider my ideas. You just read them long enough to decide they’re ridiculous. You don’t take anything I say seriously.”

You could feel it now — the frustration rising, twisted up with something closer to hurt.

“And for you to act like I’m being childish just because I care about my dumb ideas? Just because I want them to actually mean something in this project? That sucks.”

Your voice cracked, just a little.

“You always do this. I don’t even know if you hate me or what, but I didn’t let it bother me before because at least I tried. I figured, hey, you’re smarter than me, so maybe it’s fine to let you have your way every time.”

“But you know what?” Your tone dropped. “You’re the insufferable one. Not me.”

You scoffed, low and bitter. “And honestly? You’re boring, Ellie. I hope you know that.”

You didn’t wait for a reaction. You turned and walked out — before the weight in your chest turned into something you couldn’t swallow down.

You lay on your bed, staring up at the ceiling like it might give you answers. Your room was dim, quiet — too quiet. And your body felt weirdly tense, like your nerves still hadn’t caught up with the fact that you’d actually walked out.

You tried to tell yourself it wasn’t that deep anymore. That it was just a disagreement. A scene. A stupid writing scene.

But it was a big deal.

Because she didn’t even finish reading it. She didn’t even try.

“Didn’t even get past the second paragraph,” you muttered to yourself.

Your chest tightened again. God, she was so infuriating. So smug and so obsessed with structure and outlines and being right. She cared more about hitting all the correct beats than actually making something good. Than letting anything feel real.

It wasn’t just the scene. It was the way she looked at you. Making you look like you were being dramatic, overemotional and less than. And that stupid flat tone she used, like you were wasting her time.

What pissed you off the most was that you knew she wasn’t going to apologize. That she’d rather die than admit she was wrong.

She’d already proven that. Her last message was the same cold, stiff crap that looked like she’d emailed it from a fucking office cubicle.

You squeezed your eyes shut.

Your last words came back like a slap. “You’re boring, Ellie. I hope you know that.”

It was true. She was boring. And for actually thinking — feeling — you liked her one bit? No. You don’t.

You just kept mistaking her for someone else.

That was the real issue, wasn’t it?

She reminded you of E.

They had pieces of each other — enough to confuse your brain into hoping.

But E.. made you feel something. E wanted you. E actually read your writing and saw you.

You sat up abruptly, pulled your laptop out of your bag, flipped it open, and stared at the screen. Chapter Eight. Ten pages. Every line you’d poured into that moment — erased by a shrug.

Without giving yourself a second to think, you highlighted the entire document, dragged it to the trash, and hit delete.

You slammed the lid closed. If she didn’t care, then neither did you.

Right?

Your phone buzzed beside you. You ignored it at first — or tried to.

But your fingers reached for it anyway, almost unconsciously.

E:

hey

just got home

The message sat on your lock screen, simple and soft. You stared at it, and somehow, just seeing her name — her tone — made the tension in your chest pop like a soap bubble.

Your shoulders loosened. Just a little.

Of course she texted.

You let out a slow breath, eyes still on the screen. Then your gaze shifted upward, just a fraction — to the tiny digital date above the message preview.

You blinked.

“Great,” you muttered.

That explained the mood.

Well. Part of it.

You sat up a little, unlocked your phone and opened the thread.

you:

how was your day?

It didn’t take long.

E:

mm

had to deal w a little drama but it was fine

nothing major

Your eyebrows lifted slightly.

A little drama.

You stared at that line longer than you meant to.

You’d just lived through your own little drama — and it had everything to do with Ellie.

you:

ugh same

i hate my partner for this pair project rn

she’s mean

E:

mean??

to you???

you:

yeah :(

E:

who the fuck does she think she is

what did she do

you:

she won’t let me add this scene i wrote 😒

and i kinda walked out on her awhile ago

There was a pause, just a beat too long.

E:

ok so she’s insane

and blind

and ungrateful

she must’ve really gotten under your skin today huh

You sighed.

you:

yeah

hate her for it

but it’s mostly acting tbh

i’m gonna get my period real soon

so yeah

but still

i was valid right?

i mean it’s OUR project

You waited, thumbs hovering. There was a weird mix of comfort and tension in your chest — the comfort of talking to E again, even if the day had been a mess.

Your phone buzzed.

E:

of course you were

you’re always valid

she’s the one who fucked it up, not you

if it were me

i’d literally write anything you wanted

You stared at the message, eyes narrowing slightly.

E:

she’s probably sorry now

even if she’ll never say it

like

who wouldn’t be sorry if they crossed you?

You scoffed. Quiet, under your breath.

Classic. Always knowing what to say to make you feel seen — even when the feeling in your chest didn’t fully match the smile on your face.

Still. The phrasing stuck with you.

She’s sorry.

Like it wasn’t just a guess.

Like it was coming from somewhere closer than it should’ve.

You rolled onto your side, staring at the screen a second longer than you needed to. You started typing again — something light. Something that wouldn’t give too much away.

you:

u sound like u know her

You sent it as a joke, the corners of your mouth twitching. But part of you still watched the screen like you were waiting for something to break.

E:

nahh

You sighed, dropping your phone onto the bed for a second. Ellie’s face popped into your mind anyway.

Uninvited.

Unavoidable.

The thought that she could be E hadn’t really left your mind since that day — the day you worked with her at her house. You didn’t want to dwell on it, not after what happened today. But it lingered anyway — quiet and annoying, like a song stuck on a loop in the back of your head.

Ellie was too blunt. Too practical. Too stiff in her tone, too composed in the way she held herself. She’d never lower herself to something as reckless or vulnerable as anonymous flirting.

She would never.

She could never be the same girl you like.

The one who texted you at night with just a “hey.” The one who read every scene you wrote and said you were brilliant. The one who told you she missed you — who listened when you ranted, remembered the things you said at 2 a.m., and wanted to ruin you slowly, sweetly, like she actually meant it.

Pushing the thought aside, you smirked to yourself and picked your phone back up.

you:

u know what u sound?

jealous

E:

good

i am

i would be jealous of anyone who gets to be with you

who gets to see you

talk to you

hear your laugh

sit next to you

touch you

breathe the same air as you

fuck

You blinked, a quiet little laugh slipping out. Really huh.

Smirking, you texted back.

you:

u are talking to me

and u can see me

You opened your camera, adjusted slightly where you lay — hair a little messy against your pillow, eyes half-lidded, nose scrunched just enough to look like you weren’t trying.

One click.

Sent.

A beat later:

E:

jesus christ

look at you

you:

u like it?

E:

i love it

i hate how much i love it

i have a whole album of you on my phone

no shame

You blinked and snorted.

you:

ohh

even the ones (yk) are included? 👀

E:

guess

you:

i think u do ;)

what do you even do with them?

E:

stare

obsess

sigh like a loser

bite my fist

replay every second

you’re unreal

i wanna bite you

You chewed your lip, smirking to yourself.

you:

ohh

E:

why?

You stared at the blinking cursor a second, then typed, amused.

you:

i was expecting you to say you get off at it

You chuckled under your breath, half expecting her to dodge it, half expecting something worse.

But then, casually, you added. Typing slower this time.

you:

u don’t have to be jealous of anyone who’s close to me

they aren’t you anyway

tf i care about them

There was a longer pause before you added again.

you:

and actually..

we can like

call or something

if u want

You watched the three dots blinking on the screen, heart beating a little faster than usual. It caught you off guard. You’d never really asked her for anything before, not like this. And now here you were, holding your breath over three blinking dots.

E:

nah

you wouldn’t be able to handle me yet

You rolled your eyes, a smile tugging at your lips despite yourself.

you:

oh

really

doubt that

E:

don’t

trust me

not when i want you like this

you:

be serious

You shook your head a little, grinning quietly. Couldn’t handle her? Please.

You kept your phone in your hand, waiting for her to say something else. One more line. Something. But the screen stayed still, and after a while, nothing else came through.

You sighed and lay back against your pillow, eyes drifting to the ceiling. The room had gone quiet again, the kind of quiet where you could hear your own thoughts too clearly.

She really was impossible. And now you couldn’t stop thinking about her all over again.

You checked your phone again. Still no message from E. The screen stayed quiet and you felt like your nerves started crawling out of your skin again.

With a frustrated sigh, you exited the thread and opened your other messages.

A few dry group chats, a half-hearted “wyd” from someone you didn’t care about, and buried in between — Ellie.

You rolled your eyes as you reread your past conversations — God, she texts like a fucking customer service rep. So proper. So stiff. Like she’s allergic to being real. Such a nerd and a loser. Acting like she knows everything. Like she’s above the drama when she is the drama. All that brainpower and she still couldn’t even consider your ideas.

For a second, you typed something.

you:

aren’t you even gonna say sorry—

You stared at it. Then deleted the entire thing and tossed your phone onto your bed. You weren’t doing this. Not tonight.

You tried watching something. You tried opening TikTok. But nothing stuck. You kept checking your phone like maybe E would say something. Anything.

And at 12:07 AM, she finally did.

E:

can’t sleep

u up?

Your fingers didn’t hesitate.

you:

unfortunately

thanks for asking 2 hours late

E:

wow

okay

i deserved that

but i’m here now

so... miss me?

you:

maybe

still kinda annoyed though

E:

…at me?

You hesitated but smirked anyway.

you:

no

just the world

and my uterus

everything is annoying

okay but like

you wanna know something real?

E:

literally always

say it

ruin me

you:

i get…

really fucking needy

right before my period hits

There was a pause. Your legs shifted. You tried to play it off. But your skin was buzzing.

Your heart did that thing again.

That tight, fluttery, fuck-it kind of beat.

E:

how needy

You bit your lip.

you:

like

literally can’t focus

everything feels ten times worse

and better

and i just want someone to touch me

Three dots.

Then nothing.

Then three dots again.

E:

jesus

i’m losing my mind already

what do you want me to do about it

you:

idk

say dirty things

ruin my night

make me forget i hate everyone rn

E:

fuck

you know i’d do anything for you, right

literally anything

You grinned, flushed and smug all at once.

E:

just tell me what you need

please

say it

Your fingers hovered.

God.

You were still mad at Ellie.

Still confused. Still annoyed that she didn’t even try today.

But this?

This was all softness and heat. This was control. This was what you wanted.

Ellie made you furious. Maybe Ellie won't say sorry about it. Maybe she wouldn't even care.

But E did.

And that was enough for tonight.

E always knew how to fix it.

You stared at the screen a second longer, thumb hovering before you started typing again—slower this time, your breathing a little uneven.

you:

i don’t really know what i want

but thinking of you watching me rn

while i touch myself

makes me so wet

can u do that?

The dots showed up instantly.

E:

fuckfuckfuck

yes

please

i need to see you

right now

i’m losing it

You tried not to sigh as you stared at the two math test papers laid out in front of you. You failed them both.

The red ink looked brighter in the library light. One circled with a question mark beside your boxed final answer, maybe your teacher was genuinely concerned for your cognitive development.

Across from you, Ellie was typing in silence. Her brows furrowed slightly, screen glowing against her face.

You were back in the library again.

You didn’t even want to come today. Not after what you said. Not after what she didn’t say.

But Ms. Alvarez made it clear. You needed to reach at least Chapter 15 before the week ended. So here you were. Sitting across from her. Pretending it was just another day.

You hadn’t talked since last period. You just sat beside her in English, silently taking notes and never looked at her once.

Ellie didn’t say anything either.

But now, here, she glanced up at you — once, — then back at her laptop. Her eyes flicked again, more deliberate this time. She wanted to say something. Or maybe just nudge you into working again.

“What are you looking at?” she asked finally, nodding toward the papers in front of you.

You straightened. “Nothing,” you said, your voice low, trying not to sound mean.

She stared a beat longer, then returned to typing. “We need to finish Chapter 15 this week.”

“I know, okay?” you snapped, sharper than you meant.

Ellie leaned forward and — without warning — snatched the test papers from your side of the table.

You frowned. “What are you—?”

She raised her eyebrows as she scanned the scores, not saying anything.

You raised yours back, daring her to say something about it.

You snatched them back and shoved them into your bag without folding them. “I’m dumb at math, okay?” you muttered. “Don’t look so shocked.”

You huffed. “Not like it matters anyway. I’ll probably not go to college.”

You rolled your eyes and continued. “Maybe my mom’s gonna marry me off to some wealthy Christian man. We’ll live in a beige house and I’ll act like the perfect wife. But he’ll eventually cheat with his assistant because we don’t actually love each other. We’ll divorce, and I’ll be left with two bitch kids who hate me because I’m a shitty mom.”

You paused and glanced at her — realizing she’d been listening the whole time. “So yeah. It’s fine. I’ve accepted it.”

Ellie didn’t respond right away. She blinke at you, leaning back a little in her chair.

“…You do know not going to college doesn’t automatically land you in a beige house with a cheating husband, right?”

You gave her a look.

Ellie shrugged. “I’m just saying. You’d probably burn the house down before he even made it to the affair.”

You snorted under your breath, unwilling but amused.

She nudged her laptop slightly toward you, eyes flicking to the side. “Also it’s fine... to be dumb at math,” she said, almost like it was meant to be reassuring.

You turned to her fully now, one brow raised. “Are we now okay for you to say shit like that?”

Ellie just shrugged again. “I mean… you said it first.”

You blinked at her, deadpan. “Well, thanks for making me feel even dumber,” you said, voice flat with sarcasm.

You were glaring at her. Ellie rubbed the back of her neck, eyes darting to your bag, then back to you.

“I could… tutor you or something.”

You rolled your eyes, head tilting with offense. “If this is your way of saying sorry, sorry — but I won’t accept it.”

“My way of—?” Ellie blinked. “I’m not saying sorry.”

You turned toward her fully, frowning. “Why the hell not?”

She hesitated, jaw tightening. “Because I already—” She stopped herself, eyes flicking away like looking at you might give something away. “Because you also insulted me yesterday,” she added, sighing.

“Insulted?” you echoed. “It was true.”

Ellie’s mouth twitched — a flash of something angry in her eyes — before her face settled into something tighter. Irritated.

“Yeah? Well, you’re a bitch.”

You blinked at her, stunned into silence for half a second.

Before you could shoot something back, Ellie added dryly, “And at least I didn’t storm out yesterday because my most-wanted sex scene wasn’t included in our book. Are you that deprived, or just that dramatic?”

Your jaw dropped. “Excuse me? I’ll have you know I have a very active sex life, Ellie.”

She leaned back, lips curving — smug. “Yeah? Care to share then?”

Your mouth opened.

Your brain went blank for a beat too long — and unfortunately, in that beat, E came to your mind. The memory of last night flickered through you like heat lightning.

Your blush hit like a slap — sharp, hot, and way too obvious.

You tried to play it off, waving a hand. “No way. Sorry, Ellie, but I don’t want you to feel bad just because you don’t have any of that in your life.”

Ellie tilted her head, her eyes narrowing with the same smirk on her lips. “You don’t know that.”

You frowned, raising your eyebrows after. “Okay then. When was the last time it happened?”

Ellie didn’t answer right away. She just stared at you for a moment — too long, almost — before her fingers returned to the keyboard, typing again. She shrugged, eyes fixed on the screen.

“Last night.”

tag list:

@eclipcee8 @darkdanixoxo @chappellroankisser @senjukawaragitr @saverdelrey @appleofmyii @wzcoffeefloomo @fatbootymuncher @oneinameliann @ilahrawr @spiderx18 @vampirq @mioluvzsevika @ff4mi @ggutpunch @ellies-dinosaur @butchchase @bambiaches @velvetinkbym @rhian88 @azxteria @yxsmina @zaunite-516 @sweetshrew @eriiwaiii2 @bluminescent-moon @elliespotion @mascspleasegetmepregnant @dykeissih @babydoll-ivory @summerdaysout @tiedinbows @eilishfike @vixenkii @wtvmOmO @angelsglitch @vanpalmertruther @mikellie @re1daway @irysque @notkyleelol @the-sick-habit @autisticratbagtm @burden-4-dina @elliepoems @fragilevampirr @crucifiedfem @abbyandcaitlover @lovewitchss @soltwent

[angelsglitch]

ITS NOT LIKE I LIKE U

mean!reader x loser!ellie highschool au

summary: youre popular and it's safe to say you dont want losers like ellie coming to the best party of the year. but maybe the reason you dont want her there isnt the reason you would expect.

warnings: swearing, drug use

lowercase intended

pink - you

green - ellie

blue - other characters

one - see u saturday two - my little loser three - knew you hadn’t changed

you stumble over to where ellie is sitting, clearly intoxicated

“well, well, if it isn't little miss perfect. what’re you doing all alone over here?”

ellie looks up at you with a mix of annoyance and frustration, trying to maintain her composure

“shouldn’t i be calling you that…. and i'm not alone. jesse's just... getting a drink.”

“right.” you laugh then walk off.

elie lets out a sigh of relief as you walk away, but her moment of peace is short-lived. the party is getting more chaotic by the second, and she feels trapped in this situation

she walks out into the garden and takes a deep breath of fresh air, grateful for the quietness of the garden. she pulls out her phone and starts texting jesse

| ellie: i'm outside in amy’s garden. way too loud in there. come find me when you're done?

jesse responds quickly

| jesse: yeah man i'll be there in a minute jst tryna get away from this girl too lol being annoying as usual

a few minutes later, jesse finds ellie in the garden and sees her sat on a bench

“you good? saw you sneak out here before” he says

ellie nods, still looking a bit stressed. “yeah, I just needed some space. that girl is relentless.”

he sits down next to her “yeah, she gets like that. but you shouldn't let her get to you. she’s just jealous of how smart you are.”

ellie snorts “jealous? of me? that's a first.”

jesse grins “seriously man, you're way cooler than her. and all of them — you just don't see it.”

ellie rolls her eyes, but a small smile tugs at the corners of her mouth “whatever you say, jesse. let's just chill out here for a bit longer. i really don't want to deal with her ass again tonight.”

“alright, i’ll go find dina then i’ll be back” he says disappearing back inside

ellie watches him go, then leans back against the bench, staring up at the stars

“finally, some peace and quiet." she says to herself, however she jinxed it as you walk out into the garden.

ellie notices you and tenses up again, her shoulders stiffening as she pretends to be engrossed in her phone

“ohhh my god what a loser” you laugh to yourself slurring your words in the process.

ellie’s face flushes red with anger and embarrassment, but she keeps her voice steady "leave me alone bro. i’m not in the mood for your bullshit."

“why should i? i didn’t fucking want you to come anyways” you snap back

ellie stands up, finally facing you head-on “bro what the fuck is your problem with me?”

“i just don’t fucking like you!” you spit

ellie laughs bitterly "yeah, i got that loud and clear. but you know what? i don't like you either. you're just a shallow, fucking judgmental person who thinks being popular makes you better than everyone else."

“i’m not-! i just can’t- just forget it” you stutter trying not to say the wrong thing

ellie crosses her arms, looking at you with a mix of irritation and curiosity "can't what? can't handle someone who's not like you? someone who actually has interests and doesn't care about being liked by everyone?"

“you think i haven’t tried to fucking like you?”

ellie raises an eyebrow, clearly surprised by your outburst "what are you talking about? you've made it pretty clear you hate me from the moment we met."

“you just don’t get it and you never will so just… stop” you sigh

ellie scoffs

“no, i don't get it. you come here and start shit, then say you tried to like me? that's rich."

“seriously fucking just stop you’re gonna get shit out of me that i don’t wanna say”

ellie takes a step closer, her expression softening slightly “fine, i'll stop. but you know what? you're the one who keeps coming back to bother me. maybe you should figure out why that is before you start throwing insults around."

“because..” you trail off, too drunk to collect your thoughts

ellie waits, her eyes searching yours for an answer “because what? spit it out."

“because i fucking like girls” you let out a breathy scoff to yourself “and im in denial… but i know, deep down, but i cant-i have a reputation and i just can’t.”

ellie's eyes widen in surprise, her expression shifting from anger to shock “you... what? you like girls? that’s why you’ve been so shitty to me”

“i’ve always liked you I just- couldn’t let myself… so i tried to hate you and i was a bitch. i admit that”

ellie takes a step back, processing this information “wait, you've liked me this whole time? and you thought the best way to handle it was to bully me to push down your feelings?"

“what else could i do?! i couldn’t let anyone find out! everyone would see me differently, especially because you’re…. you”

she looks hurt and frustrated “so you decided to make my life hell instead of just talking to me like a normal person? you know, i thought you were just some typical homophobic bully. but now I see it's just your own internalized issues."

you stand there at a loss for words

ellie crosses her arms again, her voice firm but not unkind “you need to figure your shit out. you can't keep pretending to be someone you're not. and you definitely can't keep taking it out on me."

you sigh “im sorry okay? so there’s your answer.”

ellie sighs deeply, running a hand through her messy hair "sorry isn't enough. you need to stop being a coward and be honest with yourself and others. it's not fair to anyone, especially me."

you throw your hands up in the air in frustration “oh god i don’t even know why i told you.”

ellie looks at you with a mix of sympathy and frustration “maybe because deep down, you know you can trust me. but trust doesn't just magically fix everything, you still have to make things right.”

“i swear to god if you tell anyone about this you better count your days and count them well”

ellie’s expression hardens again “don't threaten me. and i won't tell anyone, but only because it's not my secret to share. but trust me, i can handle whatever you throw at me."

you sigh again “i just don’t know what to do.”

ellie softens slightly, seeing your genuine distress “you need to start by being honest with yourself. and maybe stop being such a jerk to people who don't deserve it.”

your expression falters and you look at her looking genuinely apologetic “im sorry, i really am. i just thought it was easier for me to not think of you in a romantic way if i just filled my head with bad thoughts about you.”

ellie shakes her head, a small smirk playing on her lips "that's the stupidest shit i've ever heard. but i guess i can understand the logic... sort of. you really are an idiot, you know that?"

“yeah, i am”

ellie chuckles softly, the tension between you starting to ease “at least you're self-aware. but seriously, you need to work on your coping mechanisms. they fucking suck.”

“seriously, i just don’t know what to do now. i don’t wanna keep on being mean to you but if i just stop altogether, my friends will think something is up.” you say

ellie considers this for a moment "well, we could start by being civil. maybe not hang out with your friends when they're being assholes to me. and maybe... we could try talking more. like normal people."

“are you serious? really? i can’t be seen speaking to ellie williams of all people.”

ellie rolls her eyes “oh please, like i care about your social status. i'm not asking you to be my best friend or anything. just... not treat me like shit anymore."

“ill think about it” you joke playfully

ellie rolls her eyes again, but there's a hint of a smile on her face "yeah, yeah. don't strain yourself too hard thinking, princess."

“you know you’re actually not that bad as ive conditioned myself to think” you admit

ellie smirks “and you're not as much of a bitch as i thought. who would've guessed?"

“oh ha ha”

ellie laughs genuinely this time "just admit it, you like speaking to me."

“maybe. or maybe my true feelings are coming out from the deep depths of shadows” you laugh

ellie raises an eyebrow, clearly amused and bursts into laughter "oh lord you're such a weirdo. but hey, if you can stop being a dick, maybe we can be friends."

“bro friends? i’m trying to not like you not fall in love with you”

ellie's expression shifts to one of surprise and slight disbelief "wow, you're really laying it all out there today, aren't you? you can't just say stuff like that and expect me to react normally."

“i’m drunk. i really don’t care what i say.”

ellie crosses her arms, looking skeptical "drunk or not, you should still watch what comes out of your mouth. especially when it's about your feelings for me."

“why” you say confused

ellie steps closer, her voice lowering “because it complicates things. you're supposed to be my bully, not someone who's secretly into me. it's confusing and messy.”

“fair enough” you shrug

she studies your face, trying to gauge your sincerity

“so, what happens now? you just go back to being the popular pretentious bitch and pretend this conversation never happened?”

“well, i don’t know. i’m sure you heard the talk of the school that me and mason broke up and i don’t know what to do about it because he wants to get back together, but i don’t like him. i don’t know if i like boys at all.”

ellie's expression softens slightly, showing a hint of concern "yeah, i heard. and honestly, it sounds like you need to figure out your own feelings before you worry about mason. you don't have to rush into anything."

“i’m sorry for like telling you my feelings about you and shit”

ellie shrugs

"it's fine. i mean, it's not like you planned to confess your feelings while drunk. just... maybe next time you're feeling confused, talk to someone who's actually a friend."

“thank you” hug her but she doesn’t push you off

she stiffens slightly at first, clearly surprised by the hug, but then relaxes and awkwardly pats your back

"yeah, don't mention it. and maybe lay off the alcohol for a bit."

“it’s cold, do you wanna talk inside?” you suggest while rubbing your arms

ellie glances at the house, then back at you “sure, why not. i could use a break from the cold anyway."

ellie follows you, looking around curiously as you walk upstairs and enter the guest room

"so, what's the plan? are we just going to sit here and avoid the real world for a while?"

“i mean sure, i don’t mind”

ellie plops down on the bed, making herself comfortable "cool. i could use a break from studying anyway. and honestly, i'm curious about why you're suddenly being nice to me."

“well i did just fucking confess my feelings” you say, confused about her obliviousness

ellie laughs softly "yeah, that is true but that doesn't mean you have to be nice. you could still go back to being your usual self tomorrow."

“fair… do you think it was obvious?”

she looks at you

“y’know that i liked you or was i too much of a bitch for you to tell”

ellie thinks for a moment, fiddling with a loose thread on her shirt "i mean, i had my suspicions at first. the way you would always target me specifically, the insults that seemed a bit too personal... it made me wonder if there was something more behind it."

“oh.”

ellie smirks again "yeah, 'oh' is right. you weren't exactly subtle about it"

“did you ever feel any type of way back..?”

ellie hesitates, avoiding eye contact “i... don't know. maybe a little confused? i mean, i never expected the girl who made my life hell to suddenly have feelings for me.”

ellie notices your silence and looks at you "what? you can't just ask me that and then not say anything."

“i just don’t know what to say.”

ellie sighs and leans back against the wall "well, maybe you should start by explaining why you even liked me in the first place. i mean, we're literally complete opposites."

“i don’t know, you’re pretty, your smart, you have friends that like you…”

ellie chuckles slightly at the compliment

“pretty? that's a new one. and yeah, i have friends, but they're not exactly popular like yours.”

“yeah.”

ellie looks at you intently

“i really didn’t plan on telling you this”

ellie laughs again, shaking her head "i know you didn't. but now that you did, we're stuck in this weird situation where you have feelings for me and i'm just... confused."

“yeah” you walk over to the bed and sit next to her

ellie tenses up slightly as you sit close to her, the bed adjusting to the new weight

"you're really not making this any easier you know”

“what?”

elie looks at you, her expression a mix of annoyance and curiosity "trying to figure out what to do about all this. you're sitting here, being nice to me, telling me you have feelings for me, and i don't know how to react."

“right”

ellie runs a hand through her messy hair, clearly frustrated

“and it's not like i can just forget everything you've done. the bullying, the insults... it's hard to just move past that.”

“i’m not saying you have to like me back ellie”

ellie looks at you, her expression softening slightly "i know you're not. but you're still expecting something from me, aren't you? some kind of reaction or response?"

“well yeah i guess, but i im not expecting anything i mean i made your life shit for ages” you reply back to her as she glances down at your lips as you talk

ellie quickly looks away, trying to hide the fact that she was staring at your lips "you're right about one thing. you've been a real fucking pain in my ass”

“i know i get it” you say as the two of you hold eye contact

ellie's breath hitches slightly as she maintains eye contact, her heart racing. the tension in the room is palpable.

"then why are you still here? why do you even care about how i feel?"

“i’ve already told you, i get it’s hard to understand, it’s confusing for me too.”

ellie swallows hard, her gaze flickering between your eyes and lips again

"yeah, it really is. you're a walking contradiction, you know that? one minute you're being a total jerk, and the next you're confessing your feelings."

“i know, i know” you say looking down at her hands avoiding her stare

ellie notices your gaze and instinctively pulls her hands away, crossing her arms defensively "stop looking at me like that."

“like what?” you say, genuinely oblivious

ellie huffs, clearly flustered

"like you want something from me. like you're waiting for me to do something."

“i said nothing, and the fact you brought it up seems like you want to do something.”

ellie rolls her eyes, but there's a hint of a smile on her face "you're infuriating, you know that? always finding a way to twist my words."

“i’m just kidding, unless? joking.”

ellie lightly shoves your shoulder, a small laugh escaping her lips

"oh, shut up. i'm not doing anything with you."

“your loss.” you shrug as you lean back on the bed

ellie watches you lie down, her eyes lingering on your relaxed form for a moment before she shakes her head

"you're actually so full of yourself. just because you're hot and popular doesn't mean i'm going to fall for your charms."

“oh so you think im hot?” you say turning to face her fully.

ellie face turns bright red as she realizes her slip-up "i- bro- i didn't say that- i just meant… oh you’re so fucking annoying”

“aw” you mock her and pull a fake sad expression

ellie covers her face with her hands, clearly embarrassed "stop being so smug. it's not cute."

“you’re cute”

ellie peeks at you through her fingers, her cheeks still flushed

"i hate you."

“i hate you too.”

-

jesse pushes through the crowd of everyone in the kitchen and walks up to dina.

“hey d, you seen ellie anywhere?”

“ohh, no she’s not in here or in the garden, maybe check out front or upstairs, we’ll look in abit” she says to him taking a sip of her drink as she dances.

“alright we’ll check for her soon” he replied as he places a kiss on her mouth.

-

ellie hesitates for a moment before lying down next to you, keeping a small distance between you

"this doesn't mean anything, okay? i'm just tired of arguing."

“yeah, i know… me too.” you let out a breathy sigh

ellie stares up at the ceiling, trying to ignore the fact that your shoulder is almost touching hers

"you're really testing my patience here man.”

“could say the same to you”

ellie looks at you with a mixture of annoyance and curiosity "what do you mean by that?"

“im kidding” you say nudging her shoulder

ellie groans in frustration "you're such a tease. i don't know if i should punch you or kiss you."

“oh?”

ellie's eyes widen at her own words, realizing what she just said

"i- like bro i didn’t even say that. i didn’t mean it like- i'm just tipsy and saying stupid things."

“so why don’t you?”

she freezes, her heart pounding in her chest*

"why don't i what?"

“the second option.”

ellie's breath hitches as she looks at you, her eyes flickering to your lips again

“you’re fucking kidding me”

“am i?”

ellie swallows hard, her resolve weakening "yeah actually, yes, you are. and i should be smarter than this, but... i can't help myself."

ellie leans in slightly, her voice barely above a whisper

"you're really going to make me do this shit, aren't you?"

“hm?” you tilt your head slightly

she leans in and kisses you passionately, her hands gripping your shirt as she pulls you closer. the kiss is filled with pent-up frustration and desire.

ellie breaks the kiss for a moment, breathing heavily

"i hate you for this."

“i hate you more.”

you lean back in ellie kisses you back fiercely, her fingers tangling in your hair as she deepens the kiss. her body presses against yours, seeking more contact.

suddenly dina walks in as she’s looking for ellie and you both jump away from eachother quickly

ellie quickly runs a hand through her messy hair, trying to compose herself as dina stands in the doorway with a smirk on her face.

"well, well, well. what do we have here?" dina scoffs

“what.”

dina leans against the doorframe, crossing her arms

"don't 'what' me. i saw you two. i'm not blind."

“what’s happening is someone fucking?” one of the school jocks, logan says peering through the door

ellie's face turns bright red again, mortified at being caught by not just dina, but also logan

"looks like the nerd finally got lucky." he says

“and with little miss queen bee? noooo wayyyyy! and after mason? hashtag downgrade!” he chuckles to himself as he snaps a pic of us, finding himself hilarious.

ellie shoots him a glare "shut up, logan. fuck off."

logan chuckles and walks away, leaving dina still standing there with a knowing look on her face

"you know this is going to be the talk of the school now right?

ellie groans and puts her head in her hands

"i'm never going to live this down. i can already hear the whispers."

“how about you just drive me home?” you change the subject, forcing a smile.

ellie looks up at you, grateful for the distraction "yeah, that sounds like a good idea. let's get out of here before anyone else shows up."

“good plan.” the two of youwalk down the stairs through the kitchen and leave amys house, then get into ellie’s car.

ellie starts the car and pulls out of amy’s driveway, her knuckles white as she grips the steering wheel tightly

"i can't believe this is happening. why did i let myself get caught up in this?"

“to be honest i think we would have been fine if logan and dina didn’t see” you say trying to look on the bright side to a situation that has no bright side

ellie glances at you, her expression a mix of frustration and annoyance

"yeah, but they did see. and now everyone's going to know. it's just... embarrassing."

“dina won’t tell anyone, but logan… i don’t know, he’s like masons best friend”

ellie's grip on the wheel tightens even more at the mention of mason

"yeah mason is the last person i want to know about this. he'll never let me hear the end of it."

“how do you think i feel he’s like the most crazy ex ever!”

ellie lets out a humorless laugh

"right, i forgot about that. he's obsessed with you. this is going to be even worse for you than it is for me."

“exactly and like y’know.”

ellie nods, understanding the gravity of the situation

"yeah, he's going to flip out. he's already threatened me once for even talking to you."

“i don’t think people would even believe logan though, like me with you.”

ellie glances at you again, her expression softening slightly "maybe not. but he'll still try to start rumors. and you know how fast they spread in this school."

“it’s fine, i don’t even care anymore.” you sigh

ellie lets out a small sigh following yours, her shoulders relaxing a bit

"you're surprisingly calm about this. i'm still freaking out here."

“i think if i lose my friends for yknow making out with a nerd then they’re obviously not my friends, y’know?”

ellie smiles slightly, touched by your words

"i appreciate that, angel. but i don't want to cause any problems for you. you have a reputation to maintain."

“it’s fine ellie, really, i feel speaking about it tonight kinda changed my thoughts on things, y’know.”

ellie pulls up to your house and parks the car

"i guess i did have some things to say. but i didn't expect them to affect you so much."

“thanks for driving me” you say giving her a genuine smile.

ellie turns to face you, her expression serious

"anytime. and if you ever need to talk again... i'm here."

“i- okay.” you say giving her a quick kiss on the lips

ellie blushes again, caught off guard by the kiss

"see you tomorrow, princess."

“see you at school nerd.”

ellie watches as you get out of the car and head inside. she sits there for a moment, processing everything that just happened before driving away.

-

ellie walks into the school hallway, feeling a mix of anxiety and determination. she can already hear whispers and see people pointing and staring at her. maybe not that dramatic, but it definitely felt that way.

ellie tries to act casual as she walks into class andtakes her seat next to you, but she can't help but notice the looks from her classmates. she whispers to you

"i think everyone knows."

“yep. same” you say quietly

the teacher looks at the two of you

“girls stop talking.”

ellie quickly shuts up and faces forward, her cheeks still slightly pink. she glances at you out of the corner of her eye, silently communicating her discomfort.

“awww love birds” one of the boys on the basketball team speaks out

ellie tenses up at the comment, her hands gripping her pencil tightly. she shoots a glare at the basketball player.

“shut the fuck up, jake."

you pull your phone out under the desk to message ellie

| you: everyone knows and ive fell out with pretty much all my friends because of it ;-;

ellie's phone buzzes and she discreetly checks it, her heart sinking as she reads your message. she types back quickly.

| ellie: sorry to hear that like genuinely. this is all my fault

| you: it’s okay, i have u right? my little loser”

ellie can't help but smile at your message, despite the situation. she types back with a hint of sarcasm.

| ellie: wow thanks for the pep talk. i feel so much better now."

| you: but seriously, it’s good. im sure masons mad, haven’t seen him yet today

ellie glances around the room nervously, half-expecting Mason to burst in at any moment.

| ellie: yeahh i’m sure he's seething. he's probably planning some dramatic confrontation.

| you: we can talk about it behind school later, me and u

ellie nods slightly, understanding your plan.

| ellie: okay sounds good. i'll meet u there after class

ellie takes a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves.

| you: its gonna be okay

| ellie: "I hope so. but I trust u. srsly

you give her a small smile as you glance over to her, feeling a mix of relief and anticipation for your meeting later.

| you: speak to u later see u there loser

divider creds: @uzmacchiato

[angelsglitch]

ITS NOT LIKE I LIKE U

mean!reader x loser!ellie - high school au

summary: youre popular and it's safe to say you dont want losers like ellie coming to the best party of the year. but maybe the reason you dont want her there isnt the reason you would expect. - ib a c.ai prompt

warnings: swearing, drinking, no smut (yet) jk

lowercase intended 💋

pink - you

green - ellie

blue - other characters

one - see u saturday two - my little loser three - knew you hadn’t changed

you were popular at school, everyone knew you, liked you, hated you, were scared of you. everybody had a different feeling towards you but overall you were known and respected. and what you were most known for were your parties, or being a menace at other peoples.

this weekend your best friend amy made it your job to invite everyone in the school. this made you wish that mass texting the school in the click of a button was a thing just like in those cheesy teen tv shows.

now why amy wanted the whole school to come is because her parents were out of town and she wanted to throw the biggest rager of the year, reasonable. so you got to inviting everyone you saw in the halls, obviously your other friends would help too just casually nudging people and saying “you can come to amys party this weekend if you want, text me if you’re coming we’ll send the details.”

if you were honest you were quite excited, who wouldn’t be? you was gonna be at a fun party and sleep over with your friends after.

however, your boyfriend mason was not happy about any of this whatsoever. which is reasonable. he knew what you were like at parties, but you felt he was being too controlling.

the two of you argued when you got home from school ending up with you breaking up with him, and also leaving you heartbroken, but you tried to look on the bright side and think the party will be even better because you’re single. right?

-

the next day at school you were telling your friends about the big breakup with mason as you chilled in the hallway — acting like the usual jerks you were.

everything was normal until you felt someone crash into you.

ellie williams - one of the quiet nerds in your school, she hung out with the drama kids — which was like social suicide, so she was a perfect victim for you and your friends to fuck around with when you guys were bored of insulting your usual targets.

she wasn’t ugly, but she wasn’t popular standards either, you actually thought she was quite pretty, but you would never say that outloud, but you hated her anyway for being a smart ass in class.

“fuck my bad.” she mumbled, she looked nervous, probably expecting a snide remark. but in your mind, you were just playfully teasing her. your mind, at least.

“watch it.” you sneered as you watched her face scrunch up.

"i said sorry." her voice was low and sad. poor, poor girl.

"i wasn't looking where i was walking."

she kneeled down to pick up her books she had dropped, then adjusting her glasses on her face without daring to make eye contact with you.

you were suprised by her tone today, you assumed she’d probably had a bad day since shed usually reply different to how she is now.

she would never dare be disrespectful to you but she’d usually tell you to drop it or just ignore you completely but she actually apologised. weird.

“so ellie, you wanna come to our party this saturday?” your friend camilla says to her

“the fuck are you doing?” you say under your breath turning to camilla, she ignores your annoyed look and laughs.

this caught ellie off guard, her eyes widening behind her lenses. she looked at the group and back at you, expecting the punchline.

"..me?" she asked, her voice a touch sceptical.

“yeah you. who else would we be talking to.” camilla says sharply, clearly annoyed by ellie’s stupid response. your friends laugh, amused by the fact that camilla is seriously inviting ellie right now. of all people, ellie williams.

she flinched at the laughter, her cheeks reddening. she pushed up her glasses again, her nervous habit when put on the spot.

"you want... me to come to a party? on saturday?"

she asked again, still trying to process the information.

“are you a fucking parrot? yes that’s what we just said” she says back, getting frustrated.

"right.. just wasn't sure if you were just fucking with me."

she avoided eye contact, her fingers fidgeting with the rings on her fingers. the idea that the ‘popular’ group would include her in anything, especially a party, was a foreign concept.

“everyone’s going” another one of your friends say, chiming in, as she pops her gum.

she lets out a half scoff half confused breath. "alright.. i'll come."

her voice was quiet, almost tentative as if she was bracing herself for the punchline, for the moment where they'd say, "psych! you actually think you're invited?!"

“why’re you still stood here? go.” you say, aggravated that this is happening.

she nodded quickly. "shit my bad. see you saturday."

she walked away, disappearing down the hall. her heart was pounding. why had she agreed? it was probably a setup, a cruel joke.

“im not going if that fucking loser is” you say turning to amy

“oh come on, it’ll be fun you won’t even know she’s there there’s gonna be that many people.” amy says putting her hand on your shoulder.

“right… whatever” you scoff, annoyed about the concept of an annoying ass nerd being at a party. you really didn’t know why you was so mad, but you was.

-

it was now friday, the party was the next night, the whole week you had been giving ellie dirty looks or purposely pushing her. you really didn’t want her to come but you couldn’t give yourself a reason why.

you walk into class but before you sit down the teacher says “oh, don’t sit down there sweetheart, i’ve swapped everyone’s seats. you sit…. there” the teacher says pointing towards a seat next to ellie.

“you gotta be fucking kidding me” you mutter under your breath as you drag your bag on the floor and slump in a chair next to ellie.

she looks over at you as you watch her write notes in her book, and you notice her staring

“the fuck are you looking at” you say sitting up

“nothing” she turns away, then continues to write notes.

what feels like hours into the class, ellie’s arm touches yours, it makes you feel weird, like something got shot through your body

“can you fucking move?!” you snap at her

“yeah… yes. sorry it was an accident just leave it” she says moving over.

-

it came to the night of the party, finally, you and your friends were getting ready, telling eachother your perfect scenarios for the night ahead.

meanwhile ellie was already ready with dina and jesse, she hadn’t had to do much, she threw on a t-shirt with a blue flannel paired with some baggy jeans.

ellie stands in front of her mirror, fidgeting with the hem of her slightly oversized band t-shirt. she's clearly uncomfortable in the outfit she's chosen

“i can't believe i let you talk me into this. i feel like a complete idiot.”

“why?” dina says turning around to scan over ellie’s outfit.

ellie looks down at her outfit, then at her messy hair

“because i'm not exactly party material. everyone there is going to look at me like i don't belong.”

“dude” dina laughs

“there’s going to be so many people there nobody will notice you” jesse says.

ellie sighs deeply, still not convinced

“that's not exactly reassuring. plus, i'm sure a certain someone will find a way to make a scene.”

she sits down and opens insta to pass the time of waiting to leave, as she opens the app, she sees this

she sighs, then closes the app then proceeds to get something to drink.

-

“i think im just gonna find someone really cute to make out with and hope someone records it and sends it to mason so he gets jealous, y’know?” you say to your friends as you put your makeup on

“that is fucking genius.” lucy says to you as she puts on her dress

“i know right.” you laugh as you take another shot. then pick up your phone to reply to masons string of texts.

you were too tipsy to care about what he had to say, he was just saying the usual ex type things ‘you better not hook up with anyone else’ or ‘don’t do any stupid shit’

you scoff and put your phone down, then take another shot. you look out the window and see people are already starting to show up. so you go downstairs to start greeting people

-

ellie hesitates at the entrance, her anxiety visibly growing as she sees you. she grips the strap of her backpack tightly

“i really don't want to do this...” she mutters under her breath

jesse nudges her forward “come on, ellie. we're already here. let's just try to have a good time.”

ellie reluctantly follows jesse, keeping her eyes downcast as they approach the door where you're standing

you notice them approaching and flash a bright smile, though it's clearly directed more at jesse than ellie

“hey jesse! glad you could make it.” you say to him not looking over at ellie

as ellie walks in properly behind jesse and dina you glance at her and take double take. she looked hot gross. you scoffed as she walked past and started to greet the others.

ellie feels your scoff like a physical blow, her shoulders tensing up. she keeps her eyes firmly fixed on the ground, trying to ignore your presence

jesse notices the tension and tries to lighten the mood

“hey, thanks for inviting us. place looks fire”

“yeah i know, amy really outdid herself”

ellie remains silent, still avoiding eye contact. she shifts from one foot to another, wishing she could disappear into the crowd

the music grows louder as more people arrive, creating a chaotic atmosphere. ellie starts to feel overwhelmed and pulls out her phone as an excuse to leave the conversation

ellie sits on the couch, nursing a drink. she watches as jesse and dina mingle with other people, occasionally joining in their conversations but mostly keeping to herself

the party is getting wilder by the minute, with people dancing and spilling drinks everywhere. ellie feels increasingly out of place in the sea of drunken teens

you glance over at her again as she sits on the couch, you feel a wave of something wash over your body but you didn’t know what. you didn’t want her presence to annoy you too much. the night was just getting started.

divider creds: @uzmacchiato

[angelsglitch]

sweaty butches. reblog. you agree.

[angelsglitch]

how soon is now? | part one

READ THIS FIRST 🇵🇸

teasers: one. two. series masterlist. next part here!!

♡: hallway crush!ellie x uni student!reader

☆: listen, i know this timeline is kind of ridiculous, but i’ve organized it all best as i can! this is the expanded story based on those first little blurbs introducing the au (reads fine on its own though), and this part specifically was originally going to be one huge fic, but i've ultimately decided to split it up and drop the first part now, because i feel like it ends in a convenient enough space where i can make a separation not so jarring. so that means this will have a direct continuation (how soon is now? 2 ? lol this is so stupid-), and that will be posted soon enough once i finish it! but yes that means after so much waiting, it's finally here for y’all. i literally thought up this silly idea right before i passed out on new years, and never expected y’all to love it so much…but i keep my promises, so here. also love the smiths and felt the title sort of fit. i feel like not too much happens but eh anyway, thank you for waiting, thank you for reading, and please enjoy!

♧:4.6k word count

◇:suggestive but not explicit - horny descriptions and tension, however no smut (for now?….BUT DON'T HOLD ME TO THAT.) no descriptions of reader’s physical appearance, no use of “y/n”, slow-burn construction and loooooads of pining, a lot of build up but stay with me, attempts at occasional foreshadowing, smau elements(text messages lmao), savage starlight is a plot point lol, hallwaycrush!ellie is sort of a mix of loser/modern/university au/dorky-ish ellie I DON'T EVEN KNOW. abby is your bestie, girl what else do i put here- this is just kinda plot, plot, and more plot progression about the whole ordeal, and me indulging my obsession with modern!ellie. (lmk if there's anything to be added!)

“Abbyyyyyyyyyy.” 

You rolled around your lifelong best friend’s bed, babbling her ear off while she studied away at her desk, or tried to at least. This situation has been a daily occurrence for weeks at this point.

Laying on your stomach facing away from her, you could hear her scoff in annoyance. “What?” “Please give me some advice..I don't know what I'm even supposed to do. She's driving me up the wall." This crush was the sole thing occupying your poor mind, so naturally, you had to drown your bestie with your troubles as well. That's what friends do. Abby spun around on her chair to face you, with a clearly fed up expression on her face, and leaning forward, resting her elbows on her knees. 

“Well I don’t fucking know man, I’ve already given you my best advice, and that's either introduce yourself, or suffer.” She said coolly. You sat up and groaned. Wasn't there an easier way? One that didn't involve actually taking initiative and doing something? Maybe, hypothetically, you ace a test, and the professor announces it in front of everyone as he emotionally congratulates his star student, and she bounds over, beaming. Then tearfully confesses her love and admiration for you- hold on, where the fuck is this going?

“Oh come on, you know I can’t do that..” You gulped a burning bundle of anxiety down as you replayed the scenarios with your obsession for the thousandth time that day, the mere crumbs you were forced to fixate on until you saw her next, the first sighting that started this whole fiasco,  and shook your head to clear it and listen to what your best friend had to say. She sighed and rubbed her eyes, slamming her textbook shut and making her way over to sit next to you.

“Listen babe, I love you, but you really gotta get ahold of yourself, alright?” She spoke sternly, looking you straight in the eyes to make sure you understood and absorbed every last word she said. “Listen, here's what you're gonna do. when you pass her in the hall, smile, it's simple but it's a classic, okay? And then you listen to the lecturer as normal, right? I have no idea what you nerds do in astrophysics, but that's besides my point. Make sure to pay attention and not stare only at her like a stalker or something, I cannot stress enough how normal you gotta be. But here's where it gets good, you still with me?” 

You're listening to her for sure, and nod vigorously. Crystal clear. She continues, “Okay you said you sit as far as possible from her? Sheesh, why'd you do that? When the class is over I want you to go over to her, and introduce yourself. Catch her on her way out, tap her on the shoulder if you're feeling bold. Ask for some of her contact details, play it cool. Just don't shit yourself, got it? All you gotta do." 

Abby finishes her speech, smirking and looking smug. She's positive she got through to you this time. On the surface you're totally chill, confident even, ready to snatch this ethereal being for yourself, however underneath all that you knew you didn't have an ounce of the courage that was required for this seemingly impossible task. 

Breathing deeply to calm yourself and try to take in her helpful words as best as possible, you give Abby a hug. “Thank you Abs, really. I'll do my best. Oh, but what if I freak out and start stuttering- or what if I trip and fall on her…I can't do this what the hell.” Swarmed with worry, you start doubting yourself yet again. Burying your face in your palms, you feel two strong hands on either side of your upper arms and you look back at Abby, who's really not playing around anymore. 

She was so serious about this it almost scared you. Either she cared about you more than anything, or she wanted to hear the end of these pathetic, lovestruck rambles. You prayed it was the former. 

“Suck it up. You can do this. You've had crushes before haven't you? This should be a piece of cake c’mon, I believe in you. Make sure to keep me updated every step of the way! I need to hear every last detail.” She lightens up at the end and releases you from her grip once she sees you've relaxed. 

Unsurprisingly, your best friend always knew what to say to snap you out of your spirals. Maybe most would disagree with her methods, say she was being rough, but they worked for you. Heart rate returning to a normal pace, you reply genuinely. 

“Okay, okay I got this. Yeah, it'll be fine.” She was getting through to you, this time you felt sure of it. “Good, good. Now will you let me finish this stupid assignment? Then we can watch something or do whatever." Abby chatted as she got up and sat back at her desk, resuming her studious endeavor as she left you with your thoughts. 

Immediately you heard her mutter, “All this and you don't even know her goddamn name…good grief.” For the sake of preserving the peace you chose to graciously ignore that one. She said she wanted some quiet, didn't she? 

Drifting away into a sea of daydreams, your thoughts inevitably returned to being clouded by this cryptic figure. It was like she'd cast a love spell on you. Did she even know who you were? Or did she shoot everyone those insufferably charming looks of hers. Was she even aware of how fucking cool she was? 

Dressed in that deliciously grungy style, you yearned to know what floated behind her greener-than-grass eyes. Her hair looked so smooth and soft, the wispy auburnette strands framing her refined features, intriguing fern tattoo decorating her lean forearm…. You felt your cheeks begin to heat up as a portrait of her materialized in your mind's eye. Nestling into the comfortable atmosphere of your best friend's room, you sunk deeper into your thoughts.

Like Abby had mentioned, it certainly wasn't as if you've never had crushes before, you've certainly had your fair share of them, like most people. But that was a sort of flaky, surface level interest, whether it be for their looks, their little quirks, or ways they treated you. Maybe it has been a while since you'd had a proper crush, but you couldn't recall a time when the infatuation, the pure limerence, had hit you this hard before. You almost felt helpless, just besotted by her.

You simply needed to act on this. Right then and there you steeled yourself, and decided you were going to follow Abby's advice after all, and go after this hallway crush. Worst comes to worst, she turns you down, you get over it eventually, bla bla end of story. It wasn't going to be too complicated, right?

You and Abby had stayed up all night, dusk till dawn, gossiping about things other than your hallway crush, shocking, and you were greatly regretting that decision the very moment it was time to gather your books and get to class.

You really did not feel like stunning everyone around you with a gorgeous outfit today, you were just trying to make it through the day in one piece to be honest with yourself. 

With a pounding headache you threw on some mismatched sweats, and ran out the door to be on time. Your bag felt unreasonably heavy as you made your way down your apartment stairs, and you cursed your past self for choosing a building without an elevator. Sure, exercise is healthy, but it can’t be when you’re feeling like a zombie, and wish for nothing more than a good, long nap.

Luckily the lecture hall was a comfortable distance away from your place, not far enough to make it a pain, but enough so you could get a much needed breath of fresh air. The tiredness had pushed all plans of action you and Abby had discussed the previous night to the back of your head, and you weren't thinking of your crush at all. At least for now. 

Walking slowly with your gaze pointed downward, you eventually made it to the hall. Completely dazed and zoned out, you made a mental note to never pull an all nighter again, gross, who’s idea was that- thump. 

Out of nowhere you're rudely jolted from your silent sulking by colliding with something, or someone? It takes a moment to register what happened, and you quickly look up from staring at the ground to sort the situation out. “Oh my gosh I am so sorry..” 

Profusely apologizing while simultaneously being smacked across the face with the realization of who this was. Her. Your words trail off as you’re suddenly winded, and you feel your blood run cold. You’re transfixed by the intense eye contact, and it feels like time has stopped. Goodness, this is dramatic. 

In the time it takes for you to briefly die and come back to life, the young woman has lowered her chunky headphones so they rest around her neck, Morissey’s vocals faintly floating out of them, and is looking at your stunned state with an indiscernible sneer playing on her face. Was this actually happening? Holy shit you and Abby did not discuss this scenario…you weren’t looking where you were going and had collided with an actual Earth angel. Great.

Still gawking at her like an absolute buffoon, akin to a deer in headlights, she breaks the tension first, with a smooth voice that you would obey virtually any command for. 

“Nah, you’re good.” And a wink. Your heart skipped a beat, or four, when you witnessed her wink at you. Did you imagine it? Was she being suave on purpose or did she have an eyelash in her eye…Was your life a literal rom-com or what? 

“Um..” Your mouth opens and closes in an attempt to form a coherent sentence, but your brain is much too fried to do so because, well, you had just made physical contact with the literal girl of your dreams. And gods did she smell good…while you’re unable to tear your eyes away from hers, she keeps talking as if nothing happened.

“I think the prof had an emergency or fuckin’, I dunno.” She stops to gesture around the two of you at the crowd that had formed in front of the auditorium’s double doors with elegant, ring adorned fingers..holy fuck you needed those inside you right fucking now- WHAT. 

Briskly shoving those thoughts down to the deepest depths of your subconscious back to where they belong, you turned your attention back to her, and put on a brave front. Hyper aware of how searing hot your face felt, her pretty self didn't show a hint of caring that you were making a fool of yourself. They say that any situation is always worse in your head than it was in actuality, well you hoped so. 

“So, what are we supposed to do now?” Clearing your throat you managed a sentence back, hooray. You were doing this. Good job. Although, of course, before the gorgeous nymph before you had a chance to respond with her own assumptions, a substitute lecturer you had never seen before pushes his way through the crowd and unlocks the door while people file in, separating you from her. You felt like Rose, viciously torn away from Jack from Titanic, what a cruel, cruel world this was.

And once again you didn't get to ask her name. Re-slinging her bag with one arm, she looks back at you one final time and throws you a “cya around.” Before disappearing into the auditorium with everyone else. You meekly nod at her and force a lopsided smile, before leaning against the wall to steady yourself after that fiasco in the now empty hallway.

Wasting virtually not a moment of time, you pulled your phone out and began furiously texting Abby with a recount of the events at a speed faster than the speed of light. 

Once that excruciatingly torturous class was over, you applauded yourself for containing the stares in her direction and keeping your eyes fixated on the professor. Whether you actually retained any information, now that was a different story. Picking up your bags and laptop, you stay behind for a moment as everyone else files out, no need to crowd and suffocate amongst the other students, and you had nowhere to be except catch up on your favorite shows and relax all by yourself. 

Filing out the auditorium with everyone else, you see a familiar face pass by you, and vaguely hear Abby’s voice in your head urging you to seize the moment. Now’s your chance, go! And so you gather every little bit of strength you possess to do just that. 

After a couple deep breaths you jog up to her. “Uh, hey.” She turns around and gives you a warm smile, making your legs instantly turn to jelly. You subtly checked her out and took in her outfit, another bulky jacket and lightly distressed jeans. Fingers studded with layered silver rings, and those big ole headphones seemed to be magnetically attached to her, she always had them on her. Note to self: ask for some music recommendations.

She was even hotter up close…with a beautiful galaxy of freckles scattered across her fair skin, you wanted to place a kiss on every single of them. “I, um, never caught your name.” “It's Ellie.” She sticks out her hand for a handshake and you accepted it, you finally had a name to the face you've been pining over so intensely for so long. Abby was going to lose it once you tell her about this. You steady your voice and hide the glee that was likely evident from this interaction going so smoothly, and introduce yourself to her as well.

After some time of idle chit chat and standing there, neither one of you knowing really what to say, Ellie pipes up, facepalming, tsking, and furrowing her brows. “Oh yeah, I don’t mean to spring this on you outta nowhere, but would you wanna study sometime?” She flushes a dusty pink, “I don't know anyone else taking this course and am having kind of a hard time with it...when I chose it, I expected it to be more about space and the planets, and less about numbers and math, my head hurts.”

Her demeanor was making you feel rather comfortable with her, even though the two of you had just formally met a few minutes prior. “I would love to, yeah!” Maybe you were being a little too enthusiastic, but at this point you were operating on pure instinct and not thinking critically of what was coming out of your mouth. “I actually don't have any plans now, or today at all, so if you want to, we can get a head start before the next class?” Well that just slipped out. Go you, blurting things out. 

You had no idea why you'd said that because your place was an absolute mess, clothes strewn everywhere, trash can still full, you'd been too preoccupied with your studies, and well her, to do much about it. To your horror, Ellie exclaims, “Hey, that's perfect! I don't have anything to do right now either, and it would be good to act on it while it's still fresh in my mind, y’know?” Her face morphs into an adorable toothy grin as she taps on her skull comically, you were becoming more obsessed by the second, if that was even possible.

Every little sliver of her personality you got to see under the stoic one you had assumed she had just grasped at your heartstrings. You smiled back at her so hard you almost pulled a muscle in your cheeks, “Awesome! Follow me, then, my dorm isn't far.”

The walk there was mostly fine as the two of you made it to your place, Ellie occasionally making comments about how she hates the class even though she adores outer space and learning about it on her own time, and you were nodding and acting as if you're listening, agreeing with her robotically while she rambled away and you daydreamed about what her lush lips would feel like on yours. You wondered if she was gentle with it, or if she’d kiss you hungrily, devour you like her very last meal….gulp.

Leading her to your place was an automatic task, not much navigation needed, and when the journey was done you had to legitimately stop short for a moment in an attempt to soothe the pounding in your chest. 

The crush that has plagued your mind for ages, who you've just met formally today, was about to be in your room. The two of you were about to be alone. That was totally fine, yeah, she can't be a murderer…..right?

“You good?” She asked sweetly, why did she have to be so nice, “Those stairs were killer, I totally get it, phew.” “Oh for sure, gets me every time.” Covering up your panic smoothly, you unlocked the door and went inside with her. When she walked inside, Ellie took a glance around your room and set herself down at the edge of your bed, immediately making herself comfortable, while you still lingered in the doorway, awkwardly swaying and staring at her, unsure of what to do with yourself. 

Suddenly you had completely forgotten why she was here in the first place. “No way, you read Savage Starlight too???” She spotted the figurine on your desk and snatched it up in her hands to inspect it thoroughly, with a childlike wonder in her eyes. “Wow, this one was a limited edition and it sold out in like an hour, I'm so jealous you got this!! How much you want for it, I'm serious.” She was so excited, and you couldn't believe it. Savage Starlight has always been one of your favorite comics ever, you've loved it since you were a young teen, and now this seemingly perfect human before you, who you're hopelessly obsessed with says she loves it too? Could she get any more flawless, is all you could wonder.

Her happiness because of this little thing you two bonded over was infectious, and some of your nerves slowly began to go away.  Grinning genuinely, you sheepishly said, “I've never met anyone else who likes it, that story has helped me through lots of phases in my life, and Daniela was my gay awakening.” Ellie gaped at you for a beat, making you almost doubt revealing that information.

“No. Fuckin’. Way. Mine too! Her suit was just- damn. And those action scenes in the third volume had my thirteen year old self’s brain just mush for, I don't even know for how long. This is crazy, I can already see we’re gonna get along so well.”

You wanted to talk to her about everything and anything forever, and her glee made you want to squish her, but there was unfortunately work to be done first. “There’s so much we have to discuss, but we gotta get some studying done first if we wanna make it out of this course alive.”

You were sitting at your desk, hunched over the sprawled out textbooks and messy notes, as you drew the graphs and talked to her about the concepts she was struggling with. Your desk was so small and you only had one chair, and you were the one using it, so Ellie was forced to hover over you to see all you were doing.

Focusing solely on the subject before you was proving to be more difficult as studying time went by, because you were a little too aware of the way she had caged you in against the desk to watch, her oversized shirt grazing your upper back. You gripped your pen ever so tightly to minimize any trembling, and kept a steady voice as best you could while explaining it all.

She was so, so close, the tension in the tiny room was palpable, she didn't seem to notice your nervous tremors or the proximity she’d created, and the low murmurs of, “ohhh, mhm, yeah,” as you embarrassingly stammered over your explanations made you flushed and to be frank, needy. You could feel her warmth radiating off of her, could faintly hear her breathing just above you. You didn't dare move a muscle. Was she feeling this too?

At this point you swore the delicious gravelly vibrations from her voice this close to you would be plenty enough to make you cream your pants. The air in the enclosed space was getting hotter and thicker by every passing moment, it took everything you had to keep yourself from losing your mind right now. If you moved back a petty few inches, you’d be pressed flush with her front. What would that be like, you wondered. Oh, no. Your throat felt drier than the desert when you swallowed, the thought of that making you weak.

Since your focus on the work was lapsing, you were beginning to make some little mistakes and blunders, compelling her to take the pen right from your hand and fix them herself. “No, no, this one’s supposed to be like this instead, see? Then you're able to get the right answer which is…” She stretches over you further, you nearly whined, someone save you, and grabs the textbook to review the solution. “Like this, yeah, I was right. Honest mistake though, don’t worry about it.”

You nod your head and make a pathetic murmur of approval, ignoring the fiery tingles spreading all the way up your arm when her hand bumps yours to return the writing utensil, and the blistering coil of want forming in your stomach. This all had to be deliberate, right? She couldn't lack that much spatial awareness, could she? Well, it wasn’t that you minded, she could get as close as she damn wanted to, you'd let her throw you around like a ragdoll even- you were just afraid your heart was going to give out if she kept it up. “Could you show me this work you guys did? Of course the one day I'm late, the prof talks about something new and I miss it.” 

What feels like an eternity later, you hear her groan above you and she returns to her earlier spot on your bed. You can finally breathe properly. Glancing at the clock, your own headache begins to set in. Crap it was late, how time flies. 

“We’ve been studying for so long, it’s getting late.” “Shit, you’re right, I’ve definitely overstayed my welcome. Sorry about that, and hey, thanks for this. I understand it all a lot better now, see you tomorrow.”

She stands up abruptly and ushers herself out of your door in a flash, to which you clumsily stand up, knock your chair over, and hastily run after her, not wanting her to go just yet. “Wait, Ellie!” “What's up, did I forget something?”

She pats her pockets and looks at you with concern. Round puppy dog eyes, and lips in a miniscule pout, so cute. You were in front of her now, but did not process what you actually wanted to say. Just ran after her like the smitten nincompoop you are. Upon feeling your face go hot, you look at the ground to mutter, “Uh- nothing. See you later.” Realistically, what were you planning on saying, or doing?

After stumbling over your words you two finally part ways and you slump down against your door, missing her presence already. You simultaneously wanted to jump around or open your bedside table drawer to release the energy you'd accumulated, and wanted to fall into the deepest sleep of your life to recuperate from the experience. This was just, a lot. You wanted to scream and screech like there's no tomorrow, but did not want to deal with noise complaints from the others living on your floor. Gosh she was so close, she shares your niche interest, your hands touched, albeit accidentally, lo and behold you were in love with her.

Maybe it was early to call it that, but you were going to plan out your future together. Preferably a quaint, peaceful farmhouse, the one you two lovebirds renovated together exactly how you envisioned, where you could ogle her doing the farmwork. Ugh. Cook all her favorite meals, make sweet, sweet love under the moonlight. Take strolls through the flower gardens you two planted, receive her curated bouquets as gifts, you two are going to have such a tender, domestic life. 

You had to mull it over some more, and didn’t dare wish to forget how close she was to you, you were still buzzing from her essence. You were pointlessly pacing around your room now, unable to stop looping the study session's events in your head. The simplicity, the eroticism of the encounter. One-sided or not, you had yet to find out more about her, the impatience was going to take over. The day almost seemed too good to be true, but for now you had to force yourself to relax and think about something other than her. Time to browse Pinterest with striking kitchen ideas for your beautiful future. 

What were you going to say to her the next time you see her? You were eager to know how, or if at all, this new friendship was going to progress. Part of you was dying of impatience, but the rest of you wanted to take it all as slow as possible, savoring every little moment and making the most of it. 

You sighed, this was going to be a long, long, year.

lovely taggies: @amiorca @mostlyhornyandsad @lasting-lover @radioheadfan699 @sophie-thefrog8 @machetegirl109 @ellieschair @aouiaa @wavesgocrash @tangerinngi @elliesbitchvenus @dinaissoprettyoml @rxreaqia @camicocom1a @elliesexual @ellslvr @boobdrug @writing-on-a-bathroom-stall @bready101 @yourelliewillms

.......really hoping this doesn't flop because it isn't smutty, yall wanted more fics that are plot soooo

[angelsglitch]

not to be that person but fuck

n don’t get me wrong I love smut as much as the next person but I cannot stand meaningless smut. With no substance just mindless sex with no passion or any ounce of affection attached to it. No buildup, no pining, no tension so thick it’s palpable no “fuck why are these jeans glued on” no “clumsiness or characters being awkward because sex is awkward sometimes and intimidating” no characterisation, character development or poking fun in a lighthearted way because

“dino boxers really?”

the way they’d be so unapologetic about it too maybe not even vocal but the look that fucking look that screams “yeah? n what you’re gonna do about it?” or maybe they’re flustered but that’s hot either way because it’s them, it’s their quirk

It’s the little details

The vulnerability? The insecurities—trying something new but being afraid to cross or plunge into unknown territories

but it’s their touch—guidance—that unspoken “you’re safe with me”

Subtle hotness/intimacy man

But yeah sex sells. Let’s be real. It’s a cheap way to get views especially when not mindful of how characters would react in such situations

[angelsglitch]

A NIGHT TO REMEMBER ✶ ft. bbf!ellie williams. prequel to this.

cw. smut, nsfw, angst if you close your eyes and look away, fingering(r!receiving), dryhumping, reader is intoxicated but it’s all consensual, mentions of a man, gin slander lol, modern au, afab!reader and fem reader. wc. 5.2k(what the helly???) note. the plot was lost halfway through so it’s just basically smut mixed with nonsense…i’m really sorry :/

the music felt way too overbearing; mixed with the alcohol you’ve consumed over the past hour or so it all felt way too heavy—almost suffocating. bittersweet clung to your tongue, sharp and herbal, the aftertaste of gin curling at the back of your throat like smoke. dry. piney. something bitter underneath, like citrus peel left to burn.

you hated gin. you only drank it because it was the first thing that was handed to you.

pushed into the far corner of your kitchen, your clothes felt too tight, and your shoes didn’t fit right. you knew they didn’t. it wasn’t because you were overwhelmed and on the verge of a breakdown, it was because they were a size too small. you wore them because they looked good with your outfit, thinking you might’ve at least gotten one compliment about it. but no. not a single person mentioned to you how your shoes looked like they were personally customized for the outfit.

you weren’t mad, or annoyed for that matter. people came here to party and not to tell you that your ass looked fantastic, and your boobs sat so perfectly they might not be real.

none of that mattered really, at all even.

you’re sweating. you feel the cup in your hand feel slippery against the softness of your palm, it might fall to the floor and ruin those shoes you should really get rid of because they don’t fit. these fucking shoes.

it wasn’t even about them. it never was. you’re just pissed they don’t fit you the only time you decided to wear them. and you were pissed because she was talking to her and not you.

it wasn't jealousy.

it wasn’t.

you were just upset. that’s all. upset because she’s been hitting on you for at least two years now and now she was talking to someone that wasn’t you.

you had no right to be jealous. you turn ellie down every time she says anything remotely suggestive, you don’t let her get anywhere pass a flirty comment, maybe two or three more get by, but that’s all.

you don’t like ellie. i mean how could you?

(but it really was more like who doesn’t? ellie was pretty, gorgeous even. with her stupid freckles, green eyes that shine so brightly under the sun of dawn. the light over her face and those freckles. and her hair, it was so pretty, soft with the most addicting smell. every single fucking time you look at her you feel unwell. this sickening feeling in your stomach, it aches.

you have no good reason to turn her down, you do it because you’re confused about why a girl like her likes you.

you‘re clumsy, anxious, you let your mouth run when you shouldn’t. you talk back when enough's been said. your comebacks are snarky. you know you shouldn’t speak, but your mouth moves anyway—quick and defensive. regret always comes later. you feel as if there isn’t much to look at if you look at a mirror.

but that’s the thing that ellie likes the most. you’re different. not in the ‘i’m not like other girls’ kind of way—but in the way you flinch when you laugh, the way you don’t know what to do with your hands. in the way she notices. she doesn’t say anything, but she sees you.

but that’s what pisses you off the most.

because ellie doesn’t like you in spite of those things. she likes you because of them.

she likes the way you get flustered when you’re cornered. she likes when you talk back. when your voice shakes, but you say it anyway. she likes how your mouth runs when it shouldn’t. how you can never just leave things alone. she likes that you’re messy, and mouthy, and unsure of yourself. and maybe that’s why you keep pushing her away.

because if she sees all that and still wants you—you don’t know what that makes you.)

with your eyes shooting laser beams into the wall right next to her, as to not seem like you’re watching her because she’ll get all cocky about it if she catches you looking. it’s not ellie if she doesn’t tease you to death. smothering you with her words, like a pair of hands around your neck—gentle at first, like she’s cradling you to kiss—until they tighten, deliberate, marking you with nothing but words. words that leave an effect they shouldn’t, and it bothers you more than you’ll ever admit.

and now she’s gone, and so is the girl she was with.

wonderful.

you unstiffen your shoulders, dropping them, trying to relax when you feel so uncomfortable. you hear your bed practically calling your name. you’re so fed up. this was supposed to be a fun party, just like every other party your brother throws. but all you could think about was that ellie hasn’t talked to you once, and that some random guy, you were pretty sure wasn’t even invited, kept trying to hit on you, giving you this disgusting drink and telling you to come find him later.

he didn’t even ask you if you like gin, just poured it into a cup with a mix of diet coke, it’s the most nasty after taste you’ve ever tasted. who would drink such monstrosity and like it?

you set your cup down—finally. the stickiness from your palm feels gross; it’s sweaty and moist, like thick mucus. you’re about to disappear upstairs when you hear her.

“you always make that face when you're annoyed. d’you know that?”

ellie.

her voice is too close. low, amused. like she was watching you from the other side of the room and couldn’t help herself. and maybe she was.

you don’t turn around. not right away. you know how this goes—she says something cocky, you get defensive, she teases you until your thoughts melt into something you can’t name. it’s always the same. always her and her dumb words.

you roll your eyes instead, loud enough for her to hear it in your silence. “didn’t know you were watching me.”

“always do.” she says, like it’s obvious. like it’s nothing. you hate the way your heart stumbles at the sound of it.

then she moves closer. you feel it more than see it, her presence sliding in beside you, the press of her arm almost grazing yours. not touching. never touching. but close enough to feel the heat radiating off her skin, her breath ghosting near your jaw.

“you looked like you were about to murder someone.” ellie murmurs, glancing at the abandoned drink.

“watcha got there?” she picks up the plastic cup you had just set down on the counter. her curiosity is shut down by the awful taste that appears in her mouth when she takes a generous sip from the cup.

“what the fuck is this!?” ellie’s face scrunches up into a look of disbelief and disgust. “what human fed you this?”

she sets the cup down and moves it further away on the counter like it’s radioactive.

“uhhhh. him over there.” you search in the crowd of people for the dark haired man that shoved the cup into your hand and smirked at you when you forced yourself to take multiple sips.

ellie follows your gaze, spots him almost instantly. the guy’s leaning against the fridge like he owns it—shirt half unbuttoned, drink in hand, grinning at someone who’s definitely not you.

she scoffs. “that guy?”

“that guy.”

“he looks like he harasses women on the street.”

you bite back a laugh, lips twitching. “that’s mean.”

“you drank his little science experiment. i’m being merciful.”

she turns to face you fully now, leaning her hip against the counter, one hand tucked into her back pocket. you glance at her, finally—just a flick of your eyes, quick and stupid—and she catches it. of course she does.

“you’ve been avoiding me all night,” she says, like it’s a casual observation and not an accusation.

“i haven’t.”

“you didn’t say hi.”

“you didn’t either.”

she tilts her head at that, amused. “so it’s my job now?”

“didn’t say that.”

“but you thought it.”

you huff, crossing your arms. “you’re insufferable.”

“and yet.” ellie grins. “here you are. still standing next to me.”

you look away. again. the floor is suddenly very interesting.

ellie leans in just slightly, drops her voice to a hum. “you look good, by the way.”

you don’t respond. not right away. your brain short-circuits a little, glitches like an old tv. there it is again. the teasing, the soft menace in her voice. the compliment you weren’t expecting but still secretly hoped for.

“shoes don’t fit.” you mutter.

“doesn’t matter. your legs look great.”

your cheeks burn. you hate her. you want to crawl out of your own skin. skin yourself alive, bash your head into a wall.

“stop it.” you say, weakly. it’s barely above a whisper.

“stop what?” she asks, already smiling like she knows. like she can feel the heat radiating off you.

you don’t answer. you can’t.

ellie shifts closer. not by much—just enough that you have to fight the urge to lean back, or lean in, or do something other than stand there, vibrating with everything you’re trying not to feel.

“you always get like this when i say something nice,” she murmurs. “all twitchy and silent. like you’re waiting for me to take it back.”

you scoff, but it doesn’t land right. too shaky. too soft.

“i’m just saying,” she continues, voice syrupy, “if you’re gonna stand there looking like that, all flushed and pretty and bitey, you can’t expect me to behave.”

your breath hitches. that’s not fair. that’s so not fair.

“i’m not bitey.” you say, eyes narrowed.

“sure you’re not.” she grins, teeth sharp. “you’re a terror.”

you glare. or try to. but your face won’t cooperate—it wants to smile, to give in, to break in all the ways she makes you break.

ellie takes one step closer, and now she’s really in your space. the music blurs behind you both. voices fade to a dull, distant buzz. it’s just her, now. her and that look in her eye. the one she saves just for you.

“you miss me?” she asks, soft and unserious and too real all at once.

you could lie. you’ve done it before. you’ve done it so many times—shrugged her off with sarcasm, buried the truth under something wry. but right now?

right now you’re toeing the edge of something dangerous, and it’s never felt more tempting.

you don’t answer. you just let her look at you. let her wait. and ellie…ellie takes that silence like for a yes.

her grin fades, just a little. her eyes dip to your mouth, then back up again, slow, like she’s memorizing the way you’re holding yourself together for her.

“come upstairs with me,” she says, gentle now. no teasing, no game.

your heart slams against your ribs. you shouldn’t.

“okay.” you say.

and she doesn’t smile this time just nods, once, like this is the moment she’s been waiting for. like she knew you’d say it eventually.

ellie takes your hand. she doesn’t ask. just does. and you let her. because of course you do. because it’s ellie. and you’ve always been hers, even when you swore you weren’t.

you follow her out of the kitchen like a shadow, steps quiet, careful. she doesn’t look back. she doesn’t need to. the music is louder in the hallway, vibrating through the walls like a pulse. it drowns out everything—your thoughts, your doubts, the little voice in your head telling you this is a mistake.

she leads you up the stairs, weaving past bodies draped over railings and sitting cross-legged on the floor. no one notices you. no one stops you. it’s like the two of you are moving through a world that doesn’t quite exist. like this is some strange little pocket of reality where everything is charged, unreal, and fragile. only you and ellie.

her hand is still in yours when she opens the door to your room. she only lets go once it’s shut behind you both, the lock clicking into place with a soft finality.

the room is dim—just the string lights across the ceiling casting a golden glow over everything. a mess of clothes on the chair. an unmade bed you can’t stop staring at. why couldn’t i clean up after i got ready for this shit of a party?

ellie sits first, casually, like this is just another friday night. leans back on her hands, legs spread, jaw set. watching you carefully. the smallest movements you make she’s there to catch them. you stay near the door. back pressed against it like it might keep you grounded.

“you okay?” she asks after a moment, like the tension isn’t loud enough to swallow you both whole. the blurred absence of the music and shouts makes you feel somewhat better. but that bitter feeling doesn’t seem to slip away.

you nod. too quickly.

“you’re lying.”

“i’m not.”

“you always do that thing with your hands when you lie.”

you look down. fuck—she’s right. your fingers are twisted together, knuckles going white.

“i didn’t come up here to fight.” you say finally, voice thinner than you want it to be. ellie doesn’t move. she just keeps looking at you. her gaze is steady, unreadable.

“i know,” she says. “i didn’t bring you up here to make you uncomfortable.”

“then why’d you bring me up here?”

a pause. her eyes soften.

“because i couldn’t look at you all night without wanting to touch you.”

your breath catches.

“ellie—”

she cuts in, quick. “i won’t. not unless you want me to.”

the silence after that is almost unbearable. you stare at her. she stares back. her face is open, honest in a way she rarely ever lets it be. you want to say something sharp. something deflective. but the truth is boiling over in your chest, and it’s too hot to ignore. you want her to touch you.

“you scare the shit out of me.” you say, with a breathy laugh feeling awkwardness flair up inside of you.

ellie blinks. “yeah?”

“yeah.”

she lets out a breath—quiet, amused, fond in that infuriating way of hers. you hate it.

“you scare the shit out of me, too.”

and just like that, the air shifts. the room tilts. everything feels precarious, like a match held too close to the fuse. your face heats up again.

“come here,” she says, barely above a whisper.

you hesitate. only for a second. then you do.

your feet move before you know it. you walk to her with your heart in your throat and your guard barely holding, and when you stop in front of her, ellie doesn’t move—not until you do. not until your knees brush against hers, light as a question.

she answers it by reaching up, slowly, fingertips grazing your hips. her eyes stay on yours. you’re confused again. you don’t understand why she wants to touch you, like this of all ways.

“still okay?” she murmurs.

“yeah,” you whisper.

and then she pulls you in. you crash into her, not fully losing control of your body but enough for her to take control and maneuver you to straddle her. her touch isn’t rough nor is it rushed. it’s small but has power. ellie knows what she’s doing.

she doesn’t kiss you. not yet. she waits. waits for you to decide.

and god, you want—no, you crave it, in that feral, bone-deep way that makes your skin itch. you want her mouth on yours, soft at first, maybe, just to mock you—but you want it to dissolve, fast, into something hungry. something unholy. you want her to kiss you like she’s starving, like she’s trying to crawl inside you through your mouth.

you want the spit. need the spit. thick, hot, shared and messy—her tongue in your mouth, sliding against yours, teeth knocking when it gets too desperate. you want it to drip, to smear, to cling to your lips and chin, to mark you in the most revoltingly human way. like her saliva belongs in your mouth. like yours belongs down her throat.

you want her to spit into you. mouth parted, eyes half-lidded, breath panting between kisses—and when she pulls away, you want it to trail between your mouths in slick strings. sticky, glistening. you want to taste her down to the root of your tongue.

you want it to ruin you. make your lips swollen, red, wrecked. make your jaw ache. you want to feel her breath enter you and exit in shudders. to drown in the taste of her, sweet and sharp, like blood and peaches and the end of the world.

the silence was killing you. like a sword penetrating skin. you stare into her eyes, deep and honest. if ellie wanted, she could get every confession out of you. she could make you admit how much you like her, she could make you say how badly you need her. make you tell her all the nasty thoughts your intoxicated brain is frying up.

your hands sneak to rest on her shoulders and you just hope she doesn’t say anything about you being desperate for her. she knows you are but ellie isn’t any better, after all, she did bring you up here for the exact reasons you’re thinking.

ellie moves in closer now—much closer than she was back in the kitchen. she’s always been bold like that. you’ve seen her before, at one of your brother’s parties, hand already halfway down some girl’s pants like it was nothing. she never cared who was watching. didn’t even seem to care how the girl felt about it, not really. maybe it was a distraction. maybe she just needed something to do with her hands.

if she wanted, she could’ve had you like that in the kitchen, but she chose to bring you to your room and be more open with her words. none of the teasing that make it seem that she was joking. she’s serious about this. she really does want you, needs to touch you.

her nose is touching yours, she doesn’t blink, just looks at you with a shine to her eyes, if you looked deep enough you could see that she’s holding back. she could take you right here right now but she chooses not to, she waits for you. she doesn’t want to take advantage. because it’s you, and she couldn’t live with herself after if she were to do so.

“ellie…” you say her name breathless, eyes trailing towards her lips. your tongue sticking out slightly licking your upper lip. you move your eyes back up to hers, reaching you hands to the back of her head to twist her hair between your fingers.

she answers you by slowly crashing her lips into yours, moving them against the plush skin when you open your mouth a little for her to slip her tongue in.

she kisses you like she means it—like she’s been waiting. her mouth is warm, slow at first, but there’s weight behind it, like she’s trying to memorize the shape of you. her tongue grazes yours, testing the waters, and you hum into it, your fingers tightening in her hair. she breathes in sharp through her nose, like she wasn’t expecting that.

ellie’s hands wander off around your body squeezing at your waist and hips, needing the flesh above clothes. she unsure about her touch, as if she squeezes you in some way you’ll tell her to stop, she careful but needy at the same time. she’s not rough or aggressive, but there’s a possessiveness to her hold, and it’s dark and full of desire.

ellie pulls back just barely, lips brushing yours as she speaks, her voice low and raspy. “you don’t know what you do to me.”

and she’s kissing down your neck, toying with the skin between her lips, making sure she leaves a mark to tease and laugh at you tomorrow. you know this but let her mark you either way, you’ll yell at yourself when you’re sober; realizing this was a mistake on your part because you gave in this easily.

but it was going to happen sooner or later, so why not now?

and you know exactly what you do to ellie. maybe not everything, maybe not the exact details, but you know what your presence does to her. the way she looks at you like you’re a loaded gun—dangerous, tempting, too easy to lose control around.

“then show me.” you whisper, a challenge and a plea in one. you move your palms to cup her face, tugging her up and kissing her harder this time, and she answers with a soft groan against you, her hands sliding beneath your shirt, palms flat against your spine as they pull you flat against her body. her hands, they’re calloused, warm, grounding. she doesn’t rush. her touch is reverent, tracing you like you’re something fragile and holy.

but you’re not, and she knows.

her teeth catch your bottom lip, not hard, just enough to make you gasp. she pulls away again, panting now, forehead pressed to yours. “if we do this…” she swallows.

“i need to know you want it. really want it.”

your thumb brushes the edge of her jaw, and she’s watching you like you’re the only thing in the world worth watching. she’s so close you can feel her heart racing against yours.

you nod. “i do.”

and ellie’s restraint finally snaps.

her hands move down to the plush flesh of your thighs, feeling the warmth of your blood beneath her fingertips as they grope you hard.

she kisses you again, rougher this time—hungry, desperate, her hands slipping further under your shirt, palms splayed wide across your bare back. her fingers dig into your skin, not hard enough to hurt, but firm enough that you know she’s grounding herself with you. your mouth parts against hers, a quiet, needy sound slipping out before you can stop it. ellie swallows it down like she’s starved for it, chasing the noise with her tongue.

she shifts underneath you, tugging you impossibly closer by the hips until you’re straddling her properly, your thighs bracketing her waist. the heat between your bodies makes you dizzy. she presses her forehead to yours, breathing heavy, like she’s trying to hold herself back, but failing.

“gonna lose my mind,” she mutters, half to herself, before she kisses you again—messier this time, open-mouthed, your tongues sliding together with a slick, desperate sound that makes you ache in places you didn’t know could ache.

your hands roam too, almost frantic, pushing under her hoodie to feel the solid lines of her stomach, her ribs, the thin cotton of her tank top clinging to her. you tug at the fabric and she gets the hint, breaking the kiss just long enough to yank the hoodie off over her head, ruffling her hair and making her freckles stand out sharper under the low light.

“better?” she teases, breathless, voice wrecked and full of something dark.

you just nod, too stunned by the sight of her like this, cheeks flushed, lips swollen from kissing you. and she’s looking at you like she wants to ruin you, hands resting heavy on your thighs, thumbs stroking lazy circles over the fabric of your skirt.

ellie tugs at the hem of your shirt, fingers curling into the material. she doesn’t pull it off yet, just slips her hands under it again, feeling your bare waist, the dip of your lower back. her thumbs brush just under the edge of your bra, and you shiver.

“can i?” she asks, and you barely hear her over the pounding in your own head.

“please.” you whisper.

and that’s all it takes. she lifts your shirt over your head slow, almost reverently, like unwrapping something she’s been dying to get her hands on for years. your hair gets a little messed up in the process and she smiles at the sight of you, like you’re the best thing she’s ever seen.

her hands come up to cup your face, thumbs brushing your flushed cheeks. her eyes are wide, a little wild, like she still can’t believe you’re here, half-naked in her lap, asking for her.

“so fuckin’ pretty,” she murmurs, leaning in to kiss your jaw, your neck, the slope of your shoulder. anywhere she can reach. you’re squirming in her lap now, needy and impatient, your hands clutching at her tank top like you’re afraid she’ll disappear if you let go.

ellie groans low in her throat when your hips grind down, just a little, testing. the friction pulls a sharp breath from both of you. she grabs your hips, holding you still.

“easy,” she mutters, voice thick, “wanna take my time.”

you whimper at that, and she grins against your skin, proud and a little smug. ellie mouths at your chest, pressing open-mouthed kisses along the top of your bra, teasing, teasing, until you whine and tug at the straps, silently begging.

“okay, okay.” she chuckles, voice rough and fond, like she’s never heard anything better than you falling apart for her.

she helps you shrug out of your bra, tossing it somewhere across the room without looking, too busy staring at you. her hands come up to cup your breasts, thumbs brushing experimentally over your nipples, watching the way your body reacts—your back arching, your mouth falling open in a silent gasp.

“jesus christ,” she mutters under her breath, more to herself than to you. “look at you.”

and then she’s leaning in, mouth closing around one nipple, sucking gently, tongue flicking, while her other hand toys with the other breast. the heat of her mouth sends sparks shooting straight to your core. you gasp, hands threading into her hair, holding her there like you might fly apart if she stops.

you rock your hips against her without thinking, chasing any kind of friction. ellie growls low in her chest, the sound vibrating against your skin.

“needy.” she mutters, pulling off you with a wet pop, dragging her mouth back up to kiss you again—deeper, messier, less polished than before. her hands slide down your back, squeezing your ass, dragging you harder against the ridge of her thigh.

“wanna feel you,” she rasps against your mouth.

“wanna make you cum just like this. fuck.”

you moan, high and broken, grinding shamelessly against her now, feeling the roughness of her jeans against the soaked fabric of your underwear. the friction is almost too much. almost not enough.

ellie kisses you harder, teeth clashing, spit slicking your chins together, hands everywhere—your hips, your thighs, your back, your ass. she rocks you against her thigh, murmuring filthy things into your mouth, barely coherent.

“so wet for me.” she pants, pulling back just enough to look down, to watch you rut against her thigh.

“fuck, look at you. makin’ a mess all over me.” you whimper, desperate, lost in it. in her.

“c’mon, baby,” ellie coaxes, voice rough and tender all at once.

“wanna feel you cum for me. just like this. show me how bad you need it.”

you shudder, the pressure building, unbearably sweet and sharp and right there. ellie keeps rocking you, keeps whispering in your ear, dirty, soft, wrecked herself.

and when you finally cum—when you break apart with a soft, bitten-off sob against her shoulder—ellie holds you through it, arms wrapped tight around you, grounding you, anchoring you.

“that’s it,” she murmurs, kissing the side of your head.

you slump against her, boneless, trembling, feeling like you might float away if she let go.

but she doesn’t.

she keeps holding you, kissing you, whispering promises you don’t have the strength to hear yet, not really. but it’s okay. you believe her anyway.

because it’s ellie. and she’s always meant it.

and just when you think she’s done, ellie shifts you, pushing you gently but firmly onto your back on the bed. climbs over you, fitting herself between your thighs like she belongs there. her hands trail down your sides, slowly, thumbs hooking into the waistband of your skirt, dragging it down your hips with agonizing patience.

you lift your hips for her without thinking, needy and frantic now, again. ellie’s mouth trails down your body as she goes—kisses on your belly, nips at your hips, leaving little stinging bites that make you gasp. she’s taking her time, savoring every inch of you like she’s been dreaming about this. maybe she has. maybe you have too.

when she gets the skirt off, she sits back on her heels for a second, just staring down at you, panting and trembling under her.

“you’re unreal,” she murmurs, voice rough with something almost reverent.

you reach for her, impatient now. “ellie—”

she smiles, wicked and sweet all at once, and leans down to kiss you again—deeper, slower, taking her time wrecking you. her hand slides between your legs, over the damp patch of your underwear, and you whimper into her mouth at the first touch.

you whine, hips bucking up into her hand, chasing the friction just like you did on her thigh. ellie shushes you, soothing, almost tender, rubbing slow circles over the wet spot right over your clit.

“gonna take real good care of you.” she promises, voice thick and syrupy.

you nod frantically, desperate for her, dizzy with it.

she slides your underwear to the side with one hand, not even bothering to take them off, and runs two fingers through your folds—testing, teasing. when she brushes your bare clit you gasp, clutching at her shirt like it’s the only thing keeping you tethered to earth.

ellie’s watching your face the whole time, eating up every little reaction you give her like it’s her new favorite meal.

“you’re gonna let me make you feel good?” she murmurs, voice low and wrecked with want.

“yes—yes, ellie, please—”

that’s all she needed to hear.

she slides one finger inside you, slow, careful, watching you for any sign of hesitation. when you moan—high and breathy—her restraint snaps. she pumps it in and out, building a rhythm, adding a second finger when you start grinding against her hand like you can’t help yourself.

her thumb finds your clit again, rubbing tight circles, and the pleasure starts to crest fast—faster than you’re ready for.

“that’s it,” ellie coos, mouth brushing your ear. “god, you’re so fucking pretty like this. wanna see you fall apart for me.”

you sob out something that might be her name, might just be a broken noise, as you tumble over the edge, more overwhelmed this time—clenching around her fingers, trembling so hard your vision whites out. ellie fucks you through it, slow and sweet, murmuring praise into your skin until you finally, finally go still beneath her.

a dragged out orgasm flushing inside you, stick around her fingers still deep inside you, toying with the squishy spot.

ellie doesn’t pull away immediately—just presses kisses along your jaw, your neck, the shell of your ear, whispering how good you were, how gorgeous you are, how she’s never wanted anything so bad in her life.

and when you finally catch your breath enough to open your eyes, she’s smiling down at you—soft, adoring, like you hung the stars in her sky.

“still scared of me?” she teases.

you laugh, too weak to reply.

you whisper something incoherent, and pull her back down into a kiss. because if this is what being scared of her feels like, you never want to be brave again.

©opt1mistic

[angelsglitch]

❀ firstlove!ellie who taps at your window in the middle of the night, impatiently waiting for you to open up

❀ firstlove!ellie who clumsily slides into your bedroom when you eventually do open up, groggy from being roused

❀ firstlove!ellie who gives a very vague explanation as to why she's even at your house, giving a mumbled "gotta show you something, cmon. bring a sweater too - it's really cold outside"

❀ firstlove!ellie who helps you out of your bedroom window, leading you back to her truck

❀ firstlove!ellie who helps you into the passengers seat, moving around blankets and bags of snacks to make room for you

❀ firstlove!ellie who drives for about a half hour until you two reach the woods, slowly rolling through trees and brush until you're in a more secluded area

❀ firstlove!ellie who gets out of the car to open the bed of her truck up, spreading out the blankets and tossing the bags of snacks in there before going to get you

❀ firstlove!ellie who lays with you on the blankets looking up at the stars and pointing out the different constellations

❀ firstlove!ellie who spends the entire night stargazing and talking with you, giggling and messing around

❀ firstlove!ellie who gets kissed mid conversation and turns bright red, hiding her face in your hoodie

❀ firstlove!ellie who tries to continue talking, voice muffled through the cloth, huffing at any teasing remarks as she sits up and reaches for a can of coke

❀ firstlove!ellie who eats through all the snacks with you, sugar rush hitting her fast and hard

❀ firstlove!ellie who wrestles around with you until her high eventually crashes, leaving her exhausted and hardly awake

❀ firstlove!ellie who eventually falls asleep on top of you, face buried in the crook of your neck with her arms wrapped tightly around you

taglist: @hihihhihahahha @lolitalovess @peskylez @saturnhas82moons @kylorey25 @lipglosskxsses @mars4hellokitty @hwasddeongbyeoli @kaykeryyy @kissyslut  @elliewilliamskisser2000 @meow4510 @therealhexstrap

[angelsglitch]

please please!!!

[angelsglitch]

in light yagami smut fics…is ryuk just chilling there watching?? like wtf is he doing? i need clarification otherwise i just picture him sitting in the room watching with a smile on his face-

instead of eating popcorn he’s munchin on apples💀

[angelsglitch]

i’m such a ‘i understand it’s fine’ girl with such a heavy heart

[angelsglitch]

family line — epilogue

ellie williams x fem!reader

family line masterlist

summary: falling in love with ellie was easy. it was harder to hate her once you knew she was the one hunting your sister.

word count: 2.6k

warnings: this fic doesn’t follow the original plot of the last of us part ii. no use of y/n.

a/n: i can't let go this story, i love it sm so here you have this part hope you like it!!

Time seemed to freeze the moment you saw her. Abby. Your sister.

The air stilled around you. Your lungs forgot how to breathe, your fingers curling slightly at your sides, like grounding yourself might stop the earth from tilting under your feet. It had been years—years of silence, of distance, of pretending you weren’t waiting for this exact moment. And now here she stood, weathered and quiet, her eyes the same but everything else different.

It was as if Ellie had known Abby would come today. She hadn’t shown up for lunch. In fact, she’d vanished entirely, and though her absence might’ve worried you once, it didn’t today. You knew her. Knew she was giving you space. Time.

At first, the reunion was awkward, brittle with too much unsaid. Words seemed sharp and heavy. But then you made a stupid joke about her haircut—some nonsense about her looking like a post-apocalyptic lumberjack—and Abby actually laughed. Just like that, you were a kid again, doing whatever it took to make your big sister smile.

You showed her the cabin. Shared the food Ellie had prepped before leaving. As you were rambling about how good it was, Abby’s eyes stayed glued to the windowswill, where some framed pictures rested. A picture of Dina, Jesse and Ellie. Your polaroid with your sister, another one of Alice, and a photograph of Ellie and Joel. You noticed how she tensed up at the sight of the man. None of you said anything about it. She just closed her eyes for a second, and turned her attention back to you.

Afterward, the two of you wandered down to the lake, settling on the dock as the sun dipped lower and bathed the world in honeyed gold.

You still didn’t quite believe it. Every time you looked over at her, you half-expected the image to flicker, like a cruel hallucination. But Abby was real. She was here. You didn’t ask why or how she found you—how she even knew where to look after you'd vanished from everyone and everything. You didn't need to. Some part of you always knew she'd find her way back to you.

A long silence stretched, filled with the gentle lapping of water and the soft rustle of wind through trees. It was almost peaceful.

Then Abby spoke, her voice cautious. "We found them." You froze, your heart picked up its pace, not daring to look at her. "The Fireflies," she added softly.

Your throat tightened. "Is… is Lev there?" you asked, the words trembling on your lips.

"Yeah. He is. We’re about eight hundred strong now."

You nodded slowly, a quiet smile creeping onto your face. Gently, you reached over and took her hand. "That’s amazing, Abby. I’m happy for you. I know how much that meant to you"

She squeezed your hand in return, her calloused palm warm in yours. "You could come with us," she said after a beat, her tone tentative but hopeful.

Your stomach dropped. "Abby—"

"—You’d have your own place. You could study surgery again, like you always talked about. We’d be together. We could—"

"Abby." Your voice was soft, a breath more than a sound.

She paused. Then, hesitantly: "You could bring her, if you wanted."

You flinched.

Ellie hadn’t come up, not once. But Abby wasn’t blind. Her gaze had lingered on the silver ring on your finger. She knew. And still, she came.

You finally turned to look at her. She looked at you like she was willing to forgive it all—if it meant you’d come back. Your chest ached with the weight of her love, her stubborn hope.

"We're happy here," you said, firm but gentle. "I'm happy here."

Abby swallowed hard. "I get that this… this life is peaceful. But what if something happens to her? Or to you? What will the other one do?"

You didn’t want to think about it.

"What if she doesn’t come back one day?" she pressed. "What if she dies out there? What then?"

"I’ve thought about it," you admitted, pulling your hand from hers. "But if something happens to one of us… the other will survive."

"I know you and—"

"You knew me, Abby," you cut in, voice sharper than intended. "But I’ve changed. I know how to survive now."

That quieted her, and the two of you sat in silence again. When your gaze drifted back toward the cabin, you spotted a thin trail of smoke curling from the chimney. Ellie was home, making dinner. That knot of tension that creeped in your chest began to loosen, replaced by something warmer. Softer.

You looked at Abby again.

"Stay the night." Before she could object, you stepped forward and wrapped your arms around her, tightly—like she used to, before everything broke. "I’m not letting you leave until the sun comes up. You know how stubborn I am."

That earned a small laugh. "Fine. But I’m not hungry. I’ll just crash on the couch."

"Works for me," you grinned.

Back inside, the cabin was filled with the rich smell of soup and woodsmoke. You paused at the doorway, inhaling deep. Ellie looked up from the pot simmering in the fireplace. Her eyes softened when they met yours, but then they shifted—landing just over your shoulder. The tension was instant.

"Hey," you said softly, fingers still looped around your sister’s.

"Hey," your wife replied, her voice quieter, her green eyes sliding back to yours.

Abby shifted awkwardly, her fingers fidgeting with the hem of her shirt. You turned to her. "You should take the bed. You must be exhausted."

"I can take the couch, it’s fine—"

"I mean it, Abs."

She glanced at Ellie, as if seeking permission. Ellie gave her a small, indifferent shrug.

Abby nodded, murmuring a nearly inaudible 'Good night' as she stepped into the bedroom and closed t he door gently behind her.

You exhaled sharply, finally feeling the tension leave your bones.Ellie sent you a lopsided smile, trying to figure out if you were okay. You smiled back, getting closer to her. You walked over, slipping into her arms without a word.

"Where were you all day, huh?" you murmured against her shoulder.

She grinned, closing her eyes, letting your soft voice ground her. "You know I like to secure the perimeter. Don’t trust those fuckers."

You chuckled, running your fingers through her auburn locks. "It was one clicker, Ellie. Lost and confused."

"Still."

The soup was surprisingly good. After eating, you both curled up on the couch. Ellie left you more space than usual—until you complained, and she shut you up with a kiss, grumbling how she 'loved being squeezed by you anyway.'

And that night, with your sister asleep in the next room, and Ellie’s heartbeat steady against your back, you slept at peace.

When the first light of dawn spilled gently across the cabin floor, Abby was already awake. She moved quietly, the door creaking softly as she opened it with deliberate care. Her steps were slow, practiced, barely stirring the stillness of morning. But the moment she turned toward the living room, she froze.

There you were—curled on the couch, tangled up in Ellie. Her arm was draped loosely around your waist, fingers resting like they belonged there. Your head was tucked into the crook of Ellie’s neck, your lips parted slightly, a soft, breathy snore escaping every few moments.

Abby’s heart stuttered. She didn’t know what she expected. Maybe a distance between you. Maybe an arm’s-length kind of love. Maybe something that could be undone. But this? This looked permanent. This looked like home.

She swallowed hard, eyes flickering over your sleeping face. Peaceful. Content. Safe.

And yet, something churned in her chest—confusion, sorrow, guilt, maybe even resentment. She didn’t want to feel it, but it sat there anyway. Wasn’t this what she’d wanted for you all along? For you to find peace? To live without fear? To be loved?

So why did it feel like a loss? Was it because you’d found all that without her? Or because she realized… it didn’t hurt as much as she thought it would?

She turned toward the door again, aching to escape the heaviness pressing down on her. But just as her hand brushed the doorknob, a voice stopped her in her tracks, calling out her name. She stiffened. For a moment, she felt like a child caught sneaking out. Slowly, she turned around.

Ellie was awake now, her voice low and hoarse from sleep. Her hand was still possessively resting on your waist, as if claiming you even in her half-conscious state. Her eyes were sharp, though, watching Abby with a guarded edge.

You were still asleep—blissfully unaware of the tension lingering in the room.

"You’re already leaving?" Ellie asked, her tone deceptively neutral, but Abby caught the note of disbelief underneath.

The question stung more than it should have. Already?

Her jaw tightened. "Yeah," she said shortly. "It’s a long journey back."

Ellie didn’t blink. "Not even going to wait for her to wake up?"

That one hit deeper. Abby’s gaze dropped to you again, her breath catching in her throat. The sun had risen enough now to cast a warm glow across your features, catching in your lashes. You looked older, but somehow your facade still glowed with tenderness. Normally, the creak of a door or the murmur of voices would’ve stirred you by now. But not this time. You were never a heavy sleeper. But maybe you were right. Maybe you did change, and she didn't know who you were now. The tought itself hurt more than it should've.

You didn’t even flinch. You were still asleep, safe and unbothered, nestled beside Ellie like nothing in the world could reach you here. That was what Abby had always wanted for you. But it still hurt.

She exhaled through her nose. "I’ll wait by the lake," she said quietly, almost reluctantly. "Then I’ll go."

Ellie gave a small nod, satisfied enough not to press further. She leaned back into the couch, her arms tightening slightly around you as if to reclaim the moment that had been interrupted.

Abby lingered a second longer. Just one more glance at your peaceful face, your hand still curled loosely near Ellie’s ribs, before she finally turned away.

She stepped out into the crisp morning, the door shutting gently behind her. And true to her word, she made her way to the lake—alone.

You woke slowly, gently, as if your body didn’t want to leave the warmth it had found. The sunlight had crept across the floor, brushing over your skin, golden and soft. But it wasn’t the light that stirred you. It was something else.

The press of lips on your neck. Again and again. Soft. Familiar. Devoted. Ellie.

Her arm was still wrapped around your waist, fingers splayed across your stomach, pulling you back into her chest. Her nose was nestled behind your ear, her breath tickling your skin between kisses. She was warm, and steady, and everything in you relaxed into her touch—until it didn’t.

Because suddenly, your memory caught up with you. The night before. The knock at the door. The voice in the woods. Abby.

Your body tensed, muscles going stiff beneath Ellie’s gentle affection. You didn’t mean to—it was instinct, that old reflex of bracing for something, for anything. And she felt it immediately. Ellie paused, then pulled back just enough to glance down at you. Her hand smoothed over your waist, slow and grounding.

"Hey," she murmured, voice still husky from sleep. "It’s okay. She didn’t leave yet."

You turned your head slightly, just enough to meet her eyes. Her thumb brushed your ribs in a soothing arc.

"She said she’d be by the lake," Ellie continued softly.

Your throat tightened. The way she said it—without bitterness, without warning, just quiet understanding—it made your chest ache. You reached up, resting your hand over hers, and nodded.

You didn’t need to say anything. Ellie pressed one last kiss to your shoulder before letting you go.

The path to the lake felt longer than you remembered. Maybe it was the weight of everything pressing down on you. Maybe it was the heaviness in your steps. Or maybe it was just that you knew what was waiting there: the last thread of a past life, one final goodbye that had never come.

When you emerged from the trees, you spotted her immediately. Abby sat on a rock by the edge of the water, her boots muddy, forearms resting on her knees, gaze cast over the still surface of the lake. She didn’t turn when she heard you approaching, but you knew she heard you.

You sat down beside her, a few feet of space between you. It was quiet for a moment. The water lapped gently against the shore. Birds chirped in the distance. You let the silence stretch, let it breathe.

"I thought you’d be gone," you said finally, voice barely above a whisper.

Abby looked over at you, her expression unreadable. "I almost left." You nodded slowly, chewing on the inside of your cheek.

"But she stopped me." She looked away again, her gaze fixed on the horizon. "She truly loves you."

The statement landed somewhere deep in your chest. "Yeah," you said quietly. "I love her too."

Abby let out a breath through her nose, not quite a sigh. "I saw it. This morning. The way you looked… peaceful. I didn’t think I’d ever see you like that again."

You didn’t answer right away. There was something aching beneath her voice, something raw. She looked at your features, and even after everything, all those years of suffer and darkness, you still looked as pure as before. As pure and kind as you always were.

"How do you still have it?" she asked suddenly, "after everything. After what we did. What I did. How do you still have a gentle heart?"

You blinked at her. The question wasn’t accusatory. It was genuine. It was lost.

You thought about it. About all the years of running. Of hiding. Of choosing softness when the world demanded sharpness. You looked at her—at the woman who once swore she’d protect your happiness, and who had tried, in her own way.

"I think…" you began, voice fragile but steady, "because if I don’t stay soft, none of it meant anything. Mom. Dad. Joel. You. Even Ellie. If I let the world make me cruel, then I lose all of it. And I’ve already lost enough."

Abby looked at you like she was memorizing your face. Like she needed to carry it with her. You glanced down at your hands. "I am aware I’m not the same girl you used to know. But she’s still in here somewhere. And... And I think Ellie sees her too."

A small, sad smile tugged at Abby’s lips. "She does."

You looked back at her. "You could still find peace, you know. Not like this. Not out there trying to fix the past. Just… let it be."

"I’m trying," she said, her voice almost breaking. "I swear I'm trying. But it’s hard when the only thing that ever felt right was you."

You swallowed the lump in your throat. "You’ll find something. Someone. It won’t be me, Abby… but you’ll find it."

The silence between you now felt heavier. More final.

She stood slowly, brushing the dirt from her hands, and then reached into her bag. She held your gaze for a long time. Then—

"I should go,” she said quietly.

You nodded, standing beside her. "Take care of yourself, Abby."

"You too, bug."

You hesitated. Then, for just a second, you leaned forward and wrapped your arms around her. She froze for a beat, then hugged you back—tight, desperate, but fleeting. When you pulled away, neither of you said another word.

You watched her walk into the trees, disappearing into the shade, and with her, the last piece of the life you’d shared. The wind picked up gently off the lake, carrying the scent of pine and earth, and the faintest trace of closure.

You turned around and made your way back to the cabin—back to Ellie.

Back home.

perm taglist !

@valeisaslut @firefly-ace @sevslover @twopeoplee @mayfldss @maximumdreamlandcoffee @elliesfavgirlfriend @abcline006 @marieeeluvsyou @eriiwaiii2

series taglist !

@kaykeryyy @vahnilla @autisticintr0vert @leavemeinthewater @alexandra-001 @liasxeatt @urge-to @catrapplesauces @jhyoos @womenlover0 @sevyscoven @antobooh @brooks-lin @sleepingwasp @iamhellagae @moki-nat

[angelsglitch]

𓏲 ๋࣭  ࣪ ˖ ♯ DEVOTEE ┆ chap xiii

⌞ streamer!ellie x youtuber!reader ⸝⸝ smau ⌝

synopsis ⌇you'd never been spent too much time watching content creators. if you had free time, it was often allocated to making your own videos. that is, until a new streamer gained traction on social media. despite being faceless, she blew up within a few months, gaining millions of fans—including yourself.

masterlist !!

⊹ ࣪ ˖𐙚 perm. taglist @luvsturniolo.     @ilovewomenfr.     @zzombiegirl.     @elliessweetheart.     @shawangel.     @defnoteleonor.     @fatbootymuncher.     @autisticintr0vert. @ellieslittleslutt 

⊹ ࣪ ˖𐙚 series taglist @ellieslefttit.    @vahnilla.    @danilvsellie.    @bunchogravie.    @twopeoplee.    @mxquelo.    @liztreez.    @bleepwobblenobblegnarnap.    @mascspleasegetmepregnant.    @iheartclairo66.    @ansceno @marvelwomenarehot0. @livvietalks. @firefly-ace. @elliewilliamskisser2000. @liv0nzi. @eriiwaiii2 @lez-zuha. @d1psht

[angelsglitch]

i need to kiss a girl so badly it's almost pathetic. i'm desperate for this lip biting, whimpering, hair pulling, dry humping, groping each other's tits, spit running down our chins kind of makeout session.

[angelsglitch]

too little, never late : masterlist

───⋆☆───────

ellie williams x female reader | college au - best friend!ellie

───⋆☆───────

" can you see me? i'm waiting for the right time

i can't read you but if you want, the pleasure's all mine "

now coming to the end of college, ellie's been your best friend since freshman year of highschool. you've shared everything together, done everything together for years now. you can't help but love her. as a friend, of course.

───⋆☆ loosely inspired by bags and more

series warnings : swearing, slowburn (ish, short series) alcohol, internalized homophobia, lots of pining, assumed unrequited love, jealousy, angst, fluff, there's a man in this sorry i was inspired by something and it just worked - best friends to lovers

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

series parts :

part one - coming soon !

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

and more !

bags - clairo

undo - the 1975

i know it won't work - gracie abrams

being in love - wet leg

treacherous - taylor swift

i love you, i'm sorry - gracie abrams

you're here, that's the thing - beabadoobee

...what are we? - lizzy mcalpine

birds of a feather - billie eilish

[ comment to be tagged <3 ]

[angelsglitch]

can u plz do a part two of guilty remains

to be honest I was intending it to be a one part fic, but I do have ideas for another part so I can def start writing a part 2! <3