apt-comix
apt-comix
A.P.T. Comix. I doodle comics inconsistently
15 posts
Icon Description: a poorly lit photo of a white paper with a hand-drawn ink logo on it. The logo is of a hand holding a power drill, with the words "A.P.T. Comix" on either side of it. End Description. My comix will be accessible with descriptions. Don't expect a schedule. sideblog of @arctic-hands
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
apt-comix · 5 days ago
Text
I've bitched about this on main but occasionally pople will try to guilt me there for posting my own art but not reblogging the art of others but the art in question isn't captioned and I rarely have both the mental energy to tackle captioning large pieces of art and i def don't have knowledge into the artist's intent and what needs to be focused on the most so 🤷‍♂️
0 notes
apt-comix · 5 days ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
13 notes · View notes
apt-comix · 5 days ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Ever think of how when you fold a zine the little gap in the middle makes the paper go OM NOM NOM I think about that a lot. If you're not sure what I'm talking about you can find a link to what this zine looks like after being folded here!
99 notes · View notes
apt-comix · 5 days ago
Text
WAIT FUCK SHIT HOW DID I FORGET THE WOMAN WHO SAVED ME FROM DROWNING
Tumblr media
[Image Descriptions: photos of a quartered, 8-page stapled zine featuring handdrawn pencil sketches on printer paper that has been edited on gimp to enhance all the flaws of the paper in a purpley-red sloppy effect. The cover is just the penciled words "Hopping On The 'People I Think About A Lot' Train (with thanks to tumblr just scramratz for the concept)". There is also the logo on the side, showing a drawn hand holding a power drill with the words "A.P.T. comix" on either side.]
Tumblr media
[first page. "Christine, for whom I bought the pregnancy test, and then smuggled the piss-soaked stick in my purse, so her father couldn't find it." A barely-adult blonde girl in a t-shirt and skirt hugs a barely-older adult with too long tangled dark hair wearing black shirt and jeans with a purse hanging from their shoulder. The blonde is crying with her eyes closed but smiling, as one of the hands wrapped around the brunette holds a pregnancy test with just one line on the screen.]
Tumblr media
["The lyft driver whose name has been lost to my ride history, who offered to stay with me in the dark when we arrived at the Radiology clinic too early." The drawing shows two adults, one an older and tired version of the first brunette now with shorter hair, smiling and exiting a car driven by an equally-tired man with a mullet. The background has been scribbled in black with the pencil.]
Tumblr media
["Kathleen, my grandmother's daughter, who stopped talking to me 5 weeks after we discovered each other." The drawing shows the faint outline of an oldish woman with long, light hair, smiling with her eyes closed as she props her face up with her hand. In the corner it says "(I'm still not entirely sure what she looks like.)
Tumblr media
["Britrney W, whom I missed out on a relationship with because I knew our tastes in music were vastly different." It shows the brunette person, now a teenager with short hair that has long strands of hair on the side, holding a backpack and looking dismayed as a teenage girl (also brunette) excitedly holds up a CD with a heart drawn on it.]
Tumblr media
["Brittney F, whose death is still never secretly stop feeling guilty for." It shows an empty park bench at the edge of a pathway, a bouquet of flowers on the ground in front of it. Of note, because of the enhanced flaws, it shows the ghosting of the cover's words mirrored on it.]
Tumblr media
["Louis, my summer romance, who ghosted me the day they found out their cancer was terminal." It shows the sketched photo of a person with very short, thin hair and wearing glasses. They look tired as they hold a happy cat. On their sleeve it is written "despite everything, it's still you."]
Tumblr media
["Cassandra, whom I knew for all of 3 days before she was kicked out of the homeless shelter in the dead of winter, and left me her coat anyway." It shows a woman in her thirties, exhaustion aging her, staring at the reader with a wry smile while wearing a winter coat with the fuzzy hood pulled up. In the background it is penciled dark. End I.D]
The scramratz comic that inspired this can be found here (my reblog with the image description)
Commentary under cut
Some day I'll make a lighthearted comic
Rip my ink levels lmao. The intent until the very last moment was just a plain pencil comic on white printer paper, but while trying to clean up and heighten contrast on one of the panels on GIMP, I clicked a button to see what it would do and it was baller as hell so I did it for the whole thing. It has blue tones on my laptop but printed more red, even tho it's quite clear on my tank printer that I had plenty of blue ink
First comic without Electric Zine Maker bc it doesn't work on my new Linux 😭. Instead I used Scribus Zine Templates by MetaParadox on Itch, then had a hell of a time trying to get my setup to actually print the page and not the individual panels, before I realized I needed to export it as a PDF then print it from my native PDF viewer, not from Scribus directly. So much wasted ink 😭😭
I was originally going to do a comic just on losing Louis twice, but this is all you're going to get about it bc i couldn't get thru editing it and realized it came out more as making their cancer about me than I felt was justifiable anyway
I haven't spoken to any of these people in years, some in a decade or more
25 notes · View notes
apt-comix · 6 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
For anyone looking for free zines on Black resistance, policing and activism, Sherwood Forest Zine Library in Austin, Texas, United States has a huge online collection for you to explore.
7K notes · View notes
apt-comix · 7 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
[Image Descriptions: photos of a quartered, 8-page stapled zine featuring handdrawn pencil sketches on printer paper that has been edited on gimp to enhance all the flaws of the paper in a purpley-red sloppy effect. The cover is just the penciled words "Hopping On The 'People I Think About A Lot' Train (with thanks to tumblr just scramratz for the concept)". There is also the logo on the side, showing a drawn hand holding a power drill with the words "A.P.T. comix" on either side.]
Tumblr media
[first page. "Christine, for whom I bought the pregnancy test, and then smuggled the piss-soaked stick in my purse, so her father couldn't find it." A barely-adult blonde girl in a t-shirt and skirt hugs a barely-older adult with too long tangled dark hair wearing black shirt and jeans with a purse hanging from their shoulder. The blonde is crying with her eyes closed but smiling, as one of the hands wrapped around the brunette holds a pregnancy test with just one line on the screen.]
Tumblr media
["The lyft driver whose name has been lost to my ride history, who offered to stay with me in the dark when we arrived at the Radiology clinic too early." The drawing shows two adults, one an older and tired version of the first brunette now with shorter hair, smiling and exiting a car driven by an equally-tired man with a mullet. The background has been scribbled in black with the pencil.]
Tumblr media
["Kathleen, my grandmother's daughter, who stopped talking to me 5 weeks after we discovered each other." The drawing shows the faint outline of an oldish woman with long, light hair, smiling with her eyes closed as she props her face up with her hand. In the corner it says "(I'm still not entirely sure what she looks like.)
Tumblr media
["Britrney W, whom I missed out on a relationship with because I knew our tastes in music were vastly different." It shows the brunette person, now a teenager with short hair that has long strands of hair on the side, holding a backpack and looking dismayed as a teenage girl (also brunette) excitedly holds up a CD with a heart drawn on it.]
Tumblr media
["Brittney F, whose death is still never secretly stop feeling guilty for." It shows an empty park bench at the edge of a pathway, a bouquet of flowers on the ground in front of it. Of note, because of the enhanced flaws, it shows the ghosting of the cover's words mirrored on it.]
Tumblr media
["Louis, my summer romance, who ghosted me the day they found out their cancer was terminal." It shows the sketched photo of a person with very short, thin hair and wearing glasses. They look tired as they hold a happy cat. On their sleeve it is written "despite everything, it's still you."]
Tumblr media
["Cassandra, whom I knew for all of 3 days before she was kicked out of the homeless shelter in the dead of winter, and left me her coat anyway." It shows a woman in her thirties, exhaustion aging her, staring at the reader with a wry smile while wearing a winter coat with the fuzzy hood pulled up. In the background it is penciled dark. End I.D]
The scramratz comic that inspired this can be found here (my reblog with the image description)
Commentary under cut
Some day I'll make a lighthearted comic
Rip my ink levels lmao. The intent until the very last moment was just a plain pencil comic on white printer paper, but while trying to clean up and heighten contrast on one of the panels on GIMP, I clicked a button to see what it would do and it was baller as hell so I did it for the whole thing. It has blue tones on my laptop but printed more red, even tho it's quite clear on my tank printer that I had plenty of blue ink
First comic without Electric Zine Maker bc it doesn't work on my new Linux 😭. Instead I used Scribus Zine Templates by MetaParadox on Itch, then had a hell of a time trying to get my setup to actually print the page and not the individual panels, before I realized I needed to export it as a PDF then print it from my native PDF viewer, not from Scribus directly. So much wasted ink 😭😭
I was originally going to do a comic just on losing Louis twice, but this is all you're going to get about it bc i couldn't get thru editing it and realized it came out more as making their cancer about me than I felt was justifiable anyway
I haven't spoken to any of these people in years, some in a decade or more
25 notes · View notes
apt-comix · 6 months ago
Text
Hey if you or anyone you know uses a cane, especially balance, I recently had a really bad flair up and was without one, but I was near a outdoor supply store, and I ended up getting a small hiking stick with a cane handle and let me tell you
1. It's lighter than any cane I've ever used
2. Its telescopic so I can keep it in my car, unlike the "folding" canes that hate being folded
3. It has a spring suspension system to provide a bit of give to your arm, like suspension on a bike, my arm doesn't get sore
4. It COMES WITH different feet for it, you don't have to BUY them seperately
5. Has a wrist strap
It's such a massive upgrade from literally any mobility cane I've ever been sold. Is it as strong as a solid hardwood or steel cane? Hell no. But it can support my weight and I'm about 200 pounds.
Also it was 30 bucks! There are better ones that go higher in price but most canes I've had to buy are more than that and wear out
8K notes · View notes
apt-comix · 7 months ago
Text
i draw zine comix bc post it note comics have been taken by a really cool dude and I don't want to infringe
0 notes
apt-comix · 8 months ago
Text
*formatted and printed
[Image Description: the following images are from a (badly cut out) hand-drawn and -written mini comic, purple ink on white printer paper, folded over and stapled into sixteen pages, one panel per page. A gloved hand can be seen holding the pages open.]
Tumblr media
[The cover. In cursive it says "Akin To A Feeling Of Loss". It shows a family tree, starting with the printed box for "Papaw", who is partnered to boxes labeled "Step Mamaw", "Nana", and far to the right is a box labeled in cursive "For Judith". From the lines leading down from Papaw and Step Mamaw are two boxes, one labeled "half uncle" and the other "half aunt". The sibling line also stretches out past the page margin. Both half aunt and half uncle each have a line going down to boxes labeled "Cousin", one Cousin has another box descending from it unlabeled. From the Papaw and Nana line is a box labeled "Mom", and descending from Mom is the A.P.T. Comix logo (described in user's icon description). From the Papaw and Judith line is a box labeled "Half Uncle", who leads to three Cousin boxes, each of which have unlabeled descending boxes. At the bottom of the page, a chain linked line goes across.]
Tumblr media
[The first page says "She wasn't my ancestor ['my' is underlined]. In proof my life is a cosmic sitcom..." The page image shows a crudely doodled stage in front of a silhouette crowd, showing a balding old man holding a paper that says "DNA", an aging woman with beehive hair looking on angrily, and a man in a black jacket in front of an open door, a sweat drop on the side of his face as he holds his hand out in a shake. There is a suitcase by his feet. Above the stage is a light-up sign that says "Laugh". The narration continues "...I had a long-lost uncle." The second page shows a dainty hand with a simple chain bracelet lightly touching fingers with a bigger, chunkier hand wearing a large watch. The text says "Don't know what went down between her and my grandfather. She was only eighteen when she had my uncle."
Tumblr media
[Third page: the same dainty, braceleted hand, held up weakly with a pool of purple scribbled blood beneath it. "She died only a year later. Gruesomely and tragically. Car, meet train." Fourth page: "The asshole who drove her under the descending barrier lived until the age of eighty-one. His obit was...something" The image is of an obituary page with a silhouette portrait. The birth year is nineteen thirty-four and the death date is twenty twenty-one. The obituary is mostly made up of scribble lines, except for the middle sentence "To his credit, he was sober when he died." At the bottom of the page the narration continues "He was never found liable in Judith's death, not that I could find. Drunk driving wasn't illegal yet."]
Tumblr media
[Fifth page. Drawings of lipstick, the chain bracelet, cat eye sunglasses, a fabric scarf with flowers on it, and a lit cigarette. "Maybe she was in love with the guy. Maybe she just wanted a normal night of teenagerhood age a year of motherhood. I'll never know." Sixth page: "My uncle died early on in the pandemic. I think I met him maybe 5 times." The picture is of a poorly-drawn Pokémon card game and a Pokéball off to the side. "Mostly I just remember playing Pokémon with his son."]
Tumblr media
[Seventh page: "I don't know is my cousins even know who she was. No bad blood, but I haven't spoken to them in years." The image is a laptop with a background window that says "NEWS: World is in bad shape. See how our–", and an email window that says "hey cuz, no n.E thing bout your dead–". The narration continues "Not sure how to broach this subject out of nowhere." Eighth page: "The records show that the only grandmother they ever knew was Judith's own mother." The picture shows another family tree, all unlabeled. At the bottom of the tree are the three Cousin boxes, leading up to the Half Uncle box, which first leads to box that has been scribbled out, then another line goes up to a different, higher box. "Her mother's obit lists Judith's son as her son. Even differentiating my uncle from her actually adopted children. (Did they keep her a secret?)"]
Tumblr media
[Ninth page: blank but for the words "But that's not your story. Judith. That's theirs. I want to know you." Tenth page: "The newspaper articles on the crash don't say anything besides your name." The picture is of a pile of pages with scribbled line words. The top page shows silhouette portraits beside their respective paragraphs. "From then on, you only exist as a name in the obits of your parents, and siblings' obituaries, having pre-deceased them. That's all I can find."]
Tumblr media
[Eleventh page: "I can't even find your own obituary." There is an uneven, blank box. "You only exist in a train crash and as a footnote in the Ancestry trees of people I don't know." There's a smaller box, with an arrow cursor in it. "And now, mine." Twelfth page: "It's not fair. You existed ['you existed' in allcaps and underlined]." The picture is of the braceleted hand, done in incomplete lines. "But I can't even find a photo of you. I made up your simple bracelet."]
Tumblr media
[Thirteenth page: "I hope you had a good enough life. I'd understand if you felt ground down by life though." There is a table with a sheet of ruled paper, a pencil next to it, and surrounded by teddy bear, pacifier, and rattle. The page has a list of three items: the first being a scribbled line, the second being the words "Nolite te Bastardes carborundum", and the third is blank. The narration continues "I hope my grandfather was kind to you. You were both so young." Fourteenth page: "I'll never know what you were like. Everyone who ever knew you is gone." There's a thought cloud with a question mark, an A.P Bio textbook, a ballerina, and a painting of a mountain with a paintbrush. "Surely, you had dreams? Goals? Even if you kept them to yourself. You had them. I know it.]
Tumblr media
[The end page. "We're from the same city, 3 decades apart. Your grave is right by the lake I nearly drowned in as a child." There is a simple headstone that says "Judith, I can't get your short story out of my head." Beneath it says "Next time I'm in town, I'll put flowers on your lonely grave." End I.D]
Formatted and I with Electric Zine Maker
4 notes · View notes
apt-comix · 8 months ago
Text
[Image Description: the following images are from a (badly cut out) hand-drawn and -written mini comic, purple ink on white printer paper, folded over and stapled into sixteen pages, one panel per page. A gloved hand can be seen holding the pages open.]
Tumblr media
[The cover. In cursive it says "Akin To A Feeling Of Loss". It shows a family tree, starting with the printed box for "Papaw", who is partnered to boxes labeled "Step Mamaw", "Nana", and far to the right is a box labeled in cursive "For Judith". From the lines leading down from Papaw and Step Mamaw are two boxes, one labeled "half uncle" and the other "half aunt". The sibling line also stretches out past the page margin. Both half aunt and half uncle each have a line going down to boxes labeled "Cousin", one Cousin has another box descending from it unlabeled. From the Papaw and Nana line is a box labeled "Mom", and descending from Mom is the A.P.T. Comix logo (described in user's icon description). From the Papaw and Judith line is a box labeled "Half Uncle", who leads to three Cousin boxes, each of which have unlabeled descending boxes. At the bottom of the page, a chain linked line goes across.]
Tumblr media
[The first page says "She wasn't my ancestor ['my' is underlined]. In proof my life is a cosmic sitcom..." The page image shows a crudely doodled stage in front of a silhouette crowd, showing a balding old man holding a paper that says "DNA", an aging woman with beehive hair looking on angrily, and a man in a black jacket in front of an open door, a sweat drop on the side of his face as he holds his hand out in a shake. There is a suitcase by his feet. Above the stage is a light-up sign that says "Laugh". The narration continues "...I had a long-lost uncle." The second page shows a dainty hand with a simple chain bracelet lightly touching fingers with a bigger, chunkier hand wearing a large watch. The text says "Don't know what went down between her and my grandfather. She was only eighteen when she had my uncle."
Tumblr media
[Third page: the same dainty, braceleted hand, held up weakly with a pool of purple scribbled blood beneath it. "She died only a year later. Gruesomely and tragically. Car, meet train." Fourth page: "The asshole who drove her under the descending barrier lived until the age of eighty-one. His obit was...something" The image is of an obituary page with a silhouette portrait. The birth year is nineteen thirty-four and the death date is twenty twenty-one. The obituary is mostly made up of scribble lines, except for the middle sentence "To his credit, he was sober when he died." At the bottom of the page the narration continues "He was never found liable in Judith's death, not that I could find. Drunk driving wasn't illegal yet."]
Tumblr media
[Fifth page. Drawings of lipstick, the chain bracelet, cat eye sunglasses, a fabric scarf with flowers on it, and a lit cigarette. "Maybe she was in love with the guy. Maybe she just wanted a normal night of teenagerhood age a year of motherhood. I'll never know." Sixth page: "My uncle died early on in the pandemic. I think I met him maybe 5 times." The picture is of a poorly-drawn Pokémon card game and a Pokéball off to the side. "Mostly I just remember playing Pokémon with his son."]
Tumblr media
[Seventh page: "I don't know is my cousins even know who she was. No bad blood, but I haven't spoken to them in years." The image is a laptop with a background window that says "NEWS: World is in bad shape. See how our–", and an email window that says "hey cuz, no n.E thing bout your dead–". The narration continues "Not sure how to broach this subject out of nowhere." Eighth page: "The records show that the only grandmother they ever knew was Judith's own mother." The picture shows another family tree, all unlabeled. At the bottom of the tree are the three Cousin boxes, leading up to the Half Uncle box, which first leads to box that has been scribbled out, then another line goes up to a different, higher box. "Her mother's obit lists Judith's son as her son. Even differentiating my uncle from her actually adopted children. (Did they keep her a secret?)"]
Tumblr media
[Ninth page: blank but for the words "But that's not your story. Judith. That's theirs. I want to know you." Tenth page: "The newspaper articles on the crash don't say anything besides your name." The picture is of a pile of pages with scribbled line words. The top page shows silhouette portraits beside their respective paragraphs. "From then on, you only exist as a name in the obits of your parents, and siblings' obituaries, having pre-deceased them. That's all I can find."]
Tumblr media
[Eleventh page: "I can't even find your own obituary." There is an uneven, blank box. "You only exist in a train crash and as a footnote in the Ancestry trees of people I don't know." There's a smaller box, with an arrow cursor in it. "And now, mine." Twelfth page: "It's not fair. You existed ['you existed' in allcaps and underlined]." The picture is of the braceleted hand, done in incomplete lines. "But I can't even find a photo of you. I made up your simple bracelet."]
Tumblr media
[Thirteenth page: "I hope you had a good enough life. I'd understand if you felt ground down by life though." There is a table with a sheet of ruled paper, a pencil next to it, and surrounded by teddy bear, pacifier, and rattle. The page has a list of three items: the first being a scribbled line, the second being the words "Nolite te Bastardes carborundum", and the third is blank. The narration continues "I hope my grandfather was kind to you. You were both so young." Fourteenth page: "I'll never know what you were like. Everyone who ever knew you is gone." There's a thought cloud with a question mark, an A.P Bio textbook, a ballerina, and a painting of a mountain with a paintbrush. "Surely, you had dreams? Goals? Even if you kept them to yourself. You had them. I know it.]
Tumblr media
[The end page. "We're from the same city, 3 decades apart. Your grave is right by the lake I nearly drowned in as a child." There is a simple headstone that says "Judith, I can't get your short story out of my head." Beneath it says "Next time I'm in town, I'll put flowers on your lonely grave." End I.D]
Formatted and I with Electric Zine Maker
4 notes · View notes
apt-comix · 8 months ago
Text
never forgive react youtubers for making ""what?????????? I'm so confused 😧😧" the peak of humor for so many people.. Now any and every piece of art that's even slightly unconventional has at least one dipshit in the comments that has to be loudly confused about it like ❔Ermmmmm what .... Op are you okay? Like fuck off. I wish I could put you in a saw trap until you understand the concept of art
5K notes · View notes
apt-comix · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
— Megan Fernandes, “Do You Sell Dignity Here?” from I Do Everything I’m Told
32K notes · View notes
apt-comix · 8 months ago
Text
CAUTION IF YOU WANT TO USE ELECTRIC ZINE MAKER
While EZM is an incredibly useful and easy tool for formatting and printing small comics and zines, the program itself is very flashy and colorful and animated, very much like an early millennium blog or indie website. Even the Itch page just to download it is like this. I rarely get photosensitive migraines now that I've been on lamotrigine, but I would advise epileptics and those who are otherwise photosensitive to not go to the EZM page or download the program.
If there's a way to turn off the flash and animation, I haven't found it yet, so far the only option I can find just turns it to night colors.
5 notes · View notes
apt-comix · 8 months ago
Text
This isn't the first comic I ever made, but it is the first I ever shared online, here
[Image Description: the following are photos of a small printed out monotone comic book, one panel per page, purple ink on white paper]
Tumblr media
[The cover. It shows a field of cartoony white stars on the purple scribbled background. There are two white patches that have "I Had A Dream Where It Was Night" and "A Dream Journal" in them, respectively.]
Tumblr media
[The first page shows a short-haired pale person in a tank top and paid pajama pants, on a dark road with a lamp on it, with a triangular beam of light coming down from it. "I was alone, on a street with one lamp." The next page shows a the same scene, now with a featureless woman in a long black dress floating in the light. The first person raises their arm in a wave. "Then a woman floated into the light."
Tumblr media
[Third page is focused on the floating woman, now with her face detailed. Her eyes and hair are dark and her expression is neutral, and she is thus described: "She was pale, with dark hair in a severe bun. She was in a flowing black dress." The fourth page is blank, except for the words "All was quiet, then she screamed."
Tumblr media
["The stars are going out!" This is written on a scribbled sky like the cover, but now half the cartoony stars are gone. "I looked up, and it was so." Sixth page focuses on an eye, opened wide beneath the brow, with a point of light reflected in the pupil. "My therapists have always said I default to catastrophic thinking."
Tumblr media
[The back cover and final panel. It shows the other eye, now dulled with no light. "What are you worried about, self?" End I.D]
Formatted and printed using Electric Zine Maker
5 notes · View notes
apt-comix · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
[Image Description: the above and following photos are of a very small printed out zine in black and white. The cover has the word "Missing" in big letters with a black background, and the words "current as of Dec 2, twenty twenty-four". At the bottom it says "a WhatsApp story". In the center are three photos in black and white, the top one showing a man and a woman, a second showing the same man and many children gathered around a table, and the bottom photo showing the family posing in the middle of a city street.]
Tumblr media
[The first page of the zine, saying in handwritten lettering "She messaged me goodbye last Sunday." In the middle of the page is a screenshot from WhatsApp, showing the sender saying "I'm sorry, my friend, but if we don't communicate anymore, be sure that I will be killed, burned, hit by a missile that tore me apart, or die of hunger and cold." The next message, by the receiver, starts out "I'm so sorry this is" but cuts off. The second page shows a simplistically drawn "Breaking News" sign in white on black. The text says "Two days before, we were cheering the I.C.C. arrest warrants."
Tumblr media
[Third page says the words "We, a world apart from each other, began to see an end to her nightmare." The picture is of a simple circle representing a globe, with a point labeled Me on the very left edge, and a point labeled Her very close to the right edge. The fourth page has a repeat of the Breaking News sign, this time black on white. The text says "Three days after, a ceasefire between Lebanon and Israel went into effect."]
Tumblr media
[Fifth page shows drawings of crowded tents in various states of sheltering as it rains, forming water in front of the tents. The text says "But she's not in Lebanon." Sixth page has inverted white-on-black, with the text starting in a rain cloud and stopping in the middle of the rain. It says "I don't know where she is now. Laid out in the rain, maybe."]
Tumblr media
[Seventh page has no picture, just the words "My therapist told me to have hope..." The eighth page shows a pen-scratched dark tunnel with a small circle of light towards the end. The text says "...but Hayam ran out of it. She told me if she survived the night, she would have a nervous breakdown."]
Tumblr media
[Ninth image says "What could I do a world away?" The circle globe is filled in completely dark. Tenth page says "I couldn't even say anything meaningful back to her." The image is of another WhatsApp screenshot. The sender texts three messages: "Kids not stoped craying [sic]", "I am fineshed [sic]", and "I hope if I just die". The receiver says in response "I don't know what to say. But you've got to keep going a little bit longer".]
Tumblr media
[Eleventh page is without image, saying "Did I have the right to say that?" Twelfth page shows two flags, one the year twenty twenty-four merging into twenty twenty-five, and the other a crudely drawn American flag. The text says "As of now, I don't know what her life is like for myself. As bad as it is, and as bad as it may get, I don't have her frame of reference."]
Tumblr media
[Thirteenth page shows a notebook with a grid in it, made up squiggle words, and at the very end it says "Fuck everything". The text says "I haven't written in my diary since the election. So I'll write it down here. But even as I am a victim of what's to come, I'm still complicit in the now." The next page is blank, saying "What could I do but apologize?"]
Tumblr media
[The back of the zine, showing a simple drawing of a boarded up door on a brick rowhouse with one boarded up window and one shattered window. On the door board it is written "If I must die, you must live to tell my story". Besides this is an arrow saying "Refaat Alareer, killed in Gaza twenty twenty-three", and another arrow that says "Actual graff in Baltimore". At the top it is written "Donate to help Hayam's family." And at the bottom is a typed-out link to a GoFundMe. End I.D]
Fundraiser verified by @nabulsi here, Hayam's story detailed here and here
@leieryx is doing art comissions in exchange for donations to the GFM here
I'll let you all know whenever I hear back from someone. In the mean time, please continue to help Hayam and her family.
(zine formatted and printed using the Electric Zine Maker program)
120 notes · View notes