astridellejo

[astridellejo]

Kitab - An Inner Ear Hypothesis astrid elle jo - 18500

I've been reading a lot of medical research papers to try and understand why the barometric pressure is wrecking my hearing and balance. I've made this comic that (hopefully) explains the step-by-step process of how I went from Covid infection to vestibular fuckery over the course of a year (or two).

Bear in mind I am not a scientist. I majored in Religious Studies and now I draw comics and post them on the internet. This is mostly just me trying to understand why I experience excruciating pain that requires me to lie perfectly still on the floor when the weather is wonky.

Transcription and links to related research papers below the fold:

1. Me: Okay. Here's my hypothesis regarding my inner ear vestibular fuckery. [It's me back in late 2023, with a runny nose, a defeated look, and Covid in my body.] VO: Step 1 | Get Covid. Yes, I had it in October 2023.

2. [Mal the Witch, with one hand on a big drum and the other holding a hammer, and an incubus holding a staple gun to the oval window of the cochlea, notice some Covid-induced mischief going on with the eustachian tube.] Mal: Hey! We kind of need that! VO: Step 2 | Inflammation blocks the eustachian tube.

3. [Mal and Inc are stuck in goo.] Mal: Gross! VO: Step 3 | Middle ear goo can't drain properly, causing otitis media with effusion (OME).

4. [A creature emerges from the OME goo and starts glompfing on the labyrinth and cochlea. Mal and Inc are still stuck.] VO: Step 4 | OME dampens hearing and weakens the blood-stria barrier (the wall) of the labyrinth and cochlea.

5. [Perilymph and Endolymph are enjoying some music together.] Endo: What is all that commotion outside? VO: Step 5 | Perilymph and endolymph of the labyrinth and cochlea become more sensitive to pressure changes.

6. [A wave of pressure thunders through the labyrinth and cochlea with a BAROOOOM! Endo covers their ears.] VO: Step 6 | Positive/negative barometric pressure oscillation greater than 0.35 Pascals per second (85 dB SPL) will agitate the peri/endo lymph.

7. [Peri radios the brain with updates while Endo shouts in agony.] Peri: Central?! This is bullshit! Endo: AAAAAAAA VO: Step 7 | Agitated lymph sends inaccurate hearing and balance data to the brain in the form of tinnitus, nausea, vertigo, and other vestibular dysfunctions.

8. [Peri and Endo lie still, dazed by the pressure experience.] Peri: Ugh. That sucked. Endo: What? VO: Step 8 | Over time, lymph diminishes reducing vestibular dysfunctions, but also reducing hearing.

9. [Me in the Pepe Silvia meme, but with 'peri' and 'endo' instead of 'Pepe' and 'Silvia'.] Me: Temperature, humidity, pressure changes at control rate frequencies, loud sounds, blood pressure changes from exercise or stress… Me: …hunger, fatigue, dehydration. Hell, maybe even certain foods can trigger it! It's all connected!

Some of the research papers I've read on the subject (and one abstract):

Vestibular disorders in patients after COVID-19 infection

Combined Effect of Fluid and Pressure on Middle Ear Function

Relationship Between Cochlear Lateral Wall Changes and Endolymphatic Hydrops in Otitis Media

Lipopolysaccharide-Induced Middle Ear Inflammation Disrupts the cochlear Intra-Strial Fluid–Blood Barrier through Down-Regulation of Tight Junction Proteins

Endolymphatic hydrops and otitis media (abstract only)

Responses of the ear to low frequency sounds, infrasound and wind turbines

Atmospheric Pressure and Onset of Episodes of Menière’s Disease - A Repeated Measures Study

A critical evaluation of “leakage” at the cochlear blood-stria-barrier and its functional significance

Be kind to each other. Get your vaccinations. Wear a mask. You really don't want to get Covid. Trust me on this.

[astridellejo]

An absolute -

[astridellejo]

Managed to get a MerMay post in this year

Beach Goth, well, beach adjacent Goth

[astridellejo]

The GALS ⚔️🔥🌙

[astridellejo]

Shadowlach by sanjadraws

[astridellejo]

So in addition to my Tuesday/Thursday ballet, I'm also taking a Wednesday modern dance. (The dance forms that emerged as a rebuttal to the strictness of ballet. And the only reason why I know that is because my teacher told me.)

Anyway, because the forms of ballet are all about floaty and airy, and that's what I've been practicing for the last three years, the grounded approach to modern dance has me feeling like Aang trying to learn earthbending from Toph.

"Oh. You need me to be grounded and direct? But I'm floaty and airy. I'm not gonna do very well with grounded and direct."

[astridellejo]

I tried updating Baldur's Gate 3 and now my external drive is unreadable.

Shit.

I'm pretty sure everything on that drive is backed up elsewhere. Still, that's really irritating. And, I suppose, a sign that I'm unlikely to ever finish playing this game.

Never made it past act one anyway.

Edit: I'm using a Satechi Mac Mini hub. It turns out the single USB-C plug does not draw enough power from the Mac to run the whole hub. As a result, the drive I have installed in the hub can crash. So that's ridiculous.

[astridellejo]

Karlach in a party dress by nervmaid

[astridellejo]

Robots who's vocal box is messed up so they have to use sign language.

Hey, that's me! Also I'm pretty sure I'm running on an overclocked 6502.

Robot disabilities. Robot who charges slowly and loses power incredibly fast and is always tired. Robot with malfunctioning lenses and can’t process visual information properly. Robot that can’t process anything too large and at a fast rate or else they’ll shut down. Robot with limbs screwed on too loose/just can’t attach correctly, so if they’re not careful they fall out. Robot disabilities,,,

[astridellejo]

Hokay, so…

In my ballet core class there is this woman who I can't make eye contact with because she's too cute and my 'tism is 'tisming.

I've been like this about her for three weeks and so I'm like 99% sure she thinks I'm some haughty bench who is too good to make friends or whatever, when in reality I'm all, "My, you are very attractive. I wish I wasn't this so I could maybe interact with you socially." You know, normal insecurities brought about by a lifetime of undiagnosed autism, the current state of being trans in America, not being able to communicate vocally, and being fifty years old and still incapable of basic adult functioning because there is no room for disability under the hellscape that is Capitalism.

Anyway, this evening I'm at my usual barre, the one in the middle of the gym, and because I forgot to put on my glasses I see a blurry figure approaching in the distance who seems to be smiling at me. So I smile back because I want to be kind and polite. And yes, this figure turns out to be the cutie I've been struggling to make eye contact with for the last three weeks, and I just smiled at her, and now she's standing at my barre. Oh crap now what?

So I try to find a balance between autistic eye contact avoidance and socially acceptable eye contact, and of course I fail miserably. But everything changed when the Fire Na… I mean when she sign languaged at me: NAME?

And just as I had predicted in a previous post, everything I ever learned about ASL flew right out of my head. I think I was able to spell my name. But did I remember to sign anything else, like 'NICE MEET-YOU'? … Eventually, yes. At the end of class.

Unfortunately during class my stupid fucking vestibular disorder decided to fall prey to a sudden drop in barometric pressure, and I make a sudden (but controlled) drop to the floor to wait for gravity to stop moving around. Meanwhile, I'm angry with my … well, my disability actually, for making me so painfully obviously vulnerable in front of this woman I think is very attractive. But whatever. It didn't seem to ruin anything as it has already been foreshadowed that she continued to sign with me at the end of class.

On one hand it's kind of fun feeling that kind of high-school-crush stupid for someone. It's not a feeling I've felt in quite a long time. But on the other hand, it felt really really uncomfortable being that vulnerable in front of someone who is still basically a complete stranger. A very attractive complete stranger with a gorgeous smile. But I think given how shit the world is right now, it's better to focus on the good stuff than on the bad (or awkward). Besides, maybe she thinks awkward is charming.

Mostly I was just happy to be signing with someone again.

[astridellejo]

I'm contemplating offering $50 art commissions, but I know nobody has any money and art is really the last thing anyone needs right now.

[astridellejo]

Kitab - Rain with a Chance of Vertigo

The weather broke my ears. (Transcription below the fold.)

1. [I'm checking the weather on my tablet.] Blonde: Are you checking the weather again? Me: Yeah. Blonde: Why? Me: I have a vestibular disorder.

2. Blonde: What is that? Me: The vestibular system manages balance and spatial orientation. Me: It's in the inner ear.

3. Me: Weather changes can make barometric pressure mess with the inner ear and that can cause all kinds of problems. Me: Like dizziness, vertigo, nausea, tinnitus, migraines, light sensitivity, brain fog, and occasional hearing loss. [A barometer shifts back and forth between stormy and sunny weather, while a bunch of emoji style faces exhibit dizziness, nausea, tinnitus, light sensitivity, brain fog, and migraine.]

4. Blonde: Whoa, that sucks. Me: Yes it does.

5. [I hold in my fingertips a couple of blue and yellow earplugs.] Me: But I've got it under control, more or less, thanks to earplugs. Blonde: Earplugs? Me: Yeah.

6. [I put the earplugs into my ears.] Me: If I block my ears from the changes in pressure, it can ease some of my symptoms. Blonde: Weird.

7. [I hold my hands over my ears, blocking two floating icons of speakers emitting sound.] Me: Of course it also means I'm deliberately kneecapping my hearing, which isn't totally great to begin with. Me: But I would much rather have no hearing and no vertigo than yes hearing and yes vertigo.

8. Blonde: Kind of idiotic that such an important system in the body can be broken by weather. Me: What?

9. Blonde: I said it's kind of … Oh. I see what you did there. Me (smiling): … What?

[astridellejo]

Did a pose study, Urbosa as the Sage of Lightning! I love totk but I do miss the Champions TT

[astridellejo]

Mother mother mother mother mother mother mother mother mother mother mother mother mother mother mother mo-

[astridellejo]

I want to be an airbender so I can maintain a stable pocket of barometric pressure around my body at all times.

The gliding and air bison are cool, too.

[astridellejo]

Airbender Anouk

Here's the new art of Anouk I mentioned in my previous post.

[astridellejo]

It's February 2015. The Legend of Korra had ended only two months ago, but I wasn't ready to leave that world. Folks on the socials were making their Avatarsona, so I decided to make one as well. I'm a Libra sun and Pisces moon and rising. That's air/water/water. So I made my Avatarsona an airbender from the Southern Water Tribe. She'd gotten airbending after Harmonic Convergence and had no idea what to do about it.

Nine years later Netflix is soon to release its live action version of ATLA, which refreshes my passion for the series. I decide to revisit my Avatarsona, updating her art after a decade of (allegedly) improving my artistic skills. She's still basically me at this point, but soon she'd be heading in her own direction.

A month later, her look has changed. She's no longer an avatar (hehe) of myself in this fictional world I adore. She is her own person now with her own name, Anouk, and her story is slowly materializing in my brain.

Over the summer, I write and draw a 13 page comic about Anouk's experience becoming an airbender. It's an absolute joy to spend time being in that world, watching The Legend of Korra again, looking at art books for reference, making new fan art and checking out other people's fan art and OCs as well.

I posted my first new art of Anouk in a decade here on my Tumblr last year. I figured now would be a good time to make some new art for her and also let you know that I'm currently working on part two of her story which will (hopefully) be done in May.

Read part one of Anouk's airbending journey here.

I love this series so much and I'm looking forward to seeing the story of the next Avatar after Korra. In the meantime, I'm gonna keep working on Anouk's story (as well as the story of the Fire Nation airbender she eventually meets and falls in love with).