bakuromiii

[bakuromiii]

love. — mark lee

pairing: mark lee x fem!reader wc: 300+ (323)

synopsis: mark’s being interviewed and is asked if he’s ever been in love. luckily for him he has.

“ have you ever been in love ? ”

the young lady asks mark. he was currently doing an interview for his upcoming album, the first fruit.

love.

when he thinks of the word love you come to mind immediately, along with his friends and family of course. however none of their faces popped up into his head as quickly as yours.

mark loved how easy your relationship was. how well you handled his hectic schedule. you’re there in every dressing room at every music show and photo shoot. how you brought treats for staff and other members of the group, saying how everyone needs to eat well to perform at their best.

mark loved how dedicated you were to your job too. most of his girlfriends just wanted to be a house wife. not that he minded that, but he wanted someone who was very goal oriented. someone who had their own life that he can explore and hear about.

mark loved how well you clicked with his parents immediately. the first time he brought you over for dinner they fell in love with you right away. his mother could not stop talking about how beautiful your kids would be.

just thinking about all the reasons about why he loved you made him smile like an idiot. mark laughed slightly, covering his mouth as an attempt to hide his smile. he tried playing it off like he was just embarrassed.

however, mark’s train of thought was distracted by a sudden noise. he turns his head to the source and sees you, apologizing to a staff member for bumping into their chair, holding bread in your hand to give out.

you give a piece of bread to the staff member you accidently bumped into and locked eyes with mark. blowing him a kiss and winking at him. that gigantic smile returns on mark’s face.

the interviewer repeats the question, and mark finally has an answer.

“ abso-fucking-lutley. ”

© CUPID4HAE — cupid’s corner

inspired by the sotc quote, even though big and carrie were never this adorable ( they had their moments )

[bakuromiii]

love 119 // anton

You and Anton are an unlikely combo. He's a professional swimmer, and you write for the school magazine. One interview with him leads to a series of consequences including asking him to prepare you for the school's swimming competition, and ultimately, falling in love with him.

➳ Characters: swimmer!Anton x school magazine writer!female reader/you

➳ Genre: high school au, boarding school au, rich kids au, comedy, fluff

➳ Words: 7.2k

➳ Warning: mentions of food, reader feels insecure about being 'average' at school, they are both down bad but oblivious until the very end

➳ A/N: This story is part of my KOZ International High series, but can totally be read on its own as it's Anton's own story.

Attending KOZ International High was like watching those movies where they send a misbehaved child to a boarding school in a different country, only for her to experience many culture shocks alongside many unfortunate events that come with living on her own for the very first time. Except that you weren’t a misbehaved child, just a girl whose parents had the money to send her abroad, and a good enough student to actually make it.

Freshman year was living hell for you. You were away from your home, your friends, and even your cute little dog. There was no one else in your whole year who came from your country, so you couldn’t befriend them on your very first day when you heard their name, unlike Heidi and Frida who both came from Germany. You had a national swimming champion, a Youtuber, an app developer, a worldwide known pianist and even a chess champion at your school alongside many students who had won different competitions in many different subjects.

Going from being the top of your class back in your home country to being an average student here - because average here still meant you performed constantly above 85% in all subjects - was rough. Being away from the familiar, your safe spaces and cosy spots and from all the people you knew at the ripe age of 15 was also rough. You felt like you had existential crises for the first few months every single day, and you didn’t know what happened or what day it was, but you just calmed down after a while.

Afterwards, you decided to take advantage of being at this school, and just enjoy the perks it had. You went to the on-site gym, you joined conversations in the communal kitchen of the student hall, you befriended one of your classmates - Dew from Thailand who was an impossibly tall yet shy guy - and you applied for the school magazine at the end of freshman year, and successfully got in.

So from sophomore year, you were a part of the school magazine team that published articles online about students, their achievements, school events but also local news, programmes and initiatives. You didn’t have to stick to just one section, but Minju and Yunah liked writing about local news, so it was kind of like their topic now. At first, you only wrote about school events, but then, you had the opportunity to conduct an interview with Anton Lee from the other class who was in the national swimming team.

However, since he was not from your class, you didn’t really know him or what he looked like, but you didn’t want to be a stalker and message him on social media (though for that to happen, you needed his ID first, and no Anton Lee on Instagram looked like it could be a 16-year-old swimming champion). So you tried your luck in the sports centre which had two giant swimming pools, and as far as you were informed (by Andrew who was on good terms with the guys from the other class), Anton usually practiced here after classes, even on weekends.

What you didn’t expect was to see five different guys and two more girls taking advantage of the swimming pool when you walked into the place in your flip-flops (no outside shoes were allowed). How the hell were you supposed to find Anton? You thought that it would be just him on this fine weekend, but alas, maybe you were the only one who didn’t like swimming that much.

You stood there, totally out of place, until one of the boys emerged from the water, and you decided to walk up to him. Or more like waddle up to him like a penguin, trying not to slip and fall into the water, especially when you saw how defined his abs were. Even though you had swimming classes in freshman year, so you saw boys in their swimwear, you definitely didn’t prepare yourself for this…

“Hi!” You gave him a little wave with your hand, gaining his attention. “Sorry to bother you, but have you happened to see Anton today?” You tried with a friendly smile, but the boy just stood there in front of you, not saying a word. It was difficult to decipher how he was feeling because he was wearing dark-coloured swim goggles, so you couldn’t see his eyes even if he was rolling them at you or not. “Anton Lee?” You tried again in case he didn’t know whom you meant.

You started to feel very weird at this point, but then, the boy got rid of his cap and his goggles, revealing a soft set of eyes and a somewhat confused expression.

“I’m Anton,” he broke it down to you in a soft voice, and you gasped a bit. Oh… so that explained the defined abs part. Right, a national swimming champion could have that.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t know what you look like,” you explained with a bit of an awkward giggle. Anton’s lips curled into a polite smile, but you could feel that it was a bit forced. Oh right, you should say why you were there!

“I’m Y/N, I write for the school magazine, and we want to interview you for next month’s installment. Would you be up for it?”

The boy looked back at you as if he had never been asked to give an interview even though you were sure that he had given dozens of interviews. At least, that’s what you could imagine with him being on the national team.

“Uhmm… sure,” he half-said, half-asked at this point, and you weren’t sure whether it was out of politeness or not, but you were thankful that he didn’t send you away.

“Cool,” you nodded excitedly, giving him a wide smile. He just looked back at you, and you realised that he had no phone on him, so you couldn’t ask him to exchange contacts. Ah, you should have thought it through before marching up here and asking him if he wanted to do an interview. “I’ll contact you with the details. I’ll come by your classroom… or something like that.

“Okay,” he nodded, water dripping down from his hair.

Since there was no coach around, he must have been practising alone, and you applauded his dedication. You had never stuck with any sport for a long enough time to call it anything serious, and now, you just went to the gym and joined the cardio classes that the school organised, but sometimes even those seemed like a waste of time. You couldn’t imagine how anyone would go through years doing the same sport, building up their performance, but here was a living proof in front of you whose chest you tried so hard to not glance at. Not just because you would be embarrassed but because you had a feeling that he would be, too.

“Okay. I won’t keep you up any longer. Thanks for your time! See you around, I guess,” you blurted out in one-go, and turned around to walk away from him. You were halfway towards the door when you almost slipped, but managed to recover without falling headfirst and making an even bigger fool out of yourself.

Gosh, what a way to make a first impression!

To be very honest, sophomore year went by in a blink of an eye now that the world (or at least the campus) opened up for you a little bit more than before.

You wrote articles for the school magazine, hang out with Dew on campus or off-campus (asking for your parents’ permission, of course, as it was mandatory for underage students when leaving school grounds), kept your friends from home up-to-date with everything that was going on in your life, focused on your studies but also tried out a few activities to see what you actually enjoyed. You even took part in an English Literature competition as well, but didn’t make it to the finals, so there’s that. Your interview with Anton became the article with the most views during the whole school year, so you got a cute little pin by the other members of the school magazine.

When junior year rolled by, the school was in a frenzy because it was about to organise a national swimming competition for the first time in the school’s history. Most students had to take part in the organisation one way or another like printing out timetables, decorating the sports centre, welcoming guests and competitors alike and directing them in the right direction of the campus, or distributing the competition’s merchandise at stalls. The swim meets would be held over the weekend, but due to the preparations, the Friday before was a short school day with classes only until 1pm. Thankfully, since the school magazine was to cover the whole event, you didn’t need to take on more work, you just needed to be there, take pictures and interview people.

You, specifically, had been assigned to interview Anton yet again, but after last time, you had his KKT ID, so you could ask him about the details. You asked him a few questions the day before the competition, and when you inquired if his parents would come to see him, you were a bit surprised to find out that they still lived in New Jersey. Not that you knew his whole bio, but for your first interview, you had gotten to know that his parents were both Korean, but moved to the States before he was born. You assumed that they came back to Korea with him, but it seemed that it wasn’t the case, and for some reason, you found it quite disheartening.

So much that when you were sitting in the spectator area, waiting for the boy and his opponents to walk into the arena for the final heat (because Anton, of course, made it to the finals), you turned to Sullyoon who came to take pictures with you for the school magazine, and asked her:

“Is it okay if I take a video of Anton while you take pictures?”

The girl looked a bit perplexed for a moment, probably not knowing why you suddenly changed your mind. However, she wasn’t one who was too interested in others’ business, so she nodded a few seconds later.

“Sure. It’s fine with me.”

“Thanks,” you beamed, smiling to yourself as you turned back just in time to see the boy walk up to his lane accompanied by his coach. He got rid of his jacket by his chair, exchanged a few words with his couch, and started warming up.

It wasn’t the first time you had seen him swim that day, but somehow, because it was the finals, you felt more nervous. You were aware that he was really good, but still… He seemed calm though, but coming to think of it, he usually seemed calm albeit a bit too shy for someone who was considered famous and popular at school. Sure, the members of the school’s first and only band - consisting of Taesan, Yechan, Gyuvin and Jungwon - were probably the most popular boys in your year, but before they rose to the school-level stardom, Anton was probably the most popular one in your year.

Not that you cared too much about popularity, and he didn’t seem to do so either, he was too busy practising. Though he did practise at school too, he had his coach-led sessions outside of the school, so after classes, he was often seen leaving school grounds, only coming back later at night. You sometimes caught sight of him in the corridor at the student hall, but you didn’t interact a lot, just a few hellos here and a few good nights there. Since he wasn’t in your class, sometimes you wondered if he was as shy around his classmates as he was around you, or maybe it was just because you were a girl.

“Y/N, aren’t you recording?” Sullyoon’s voice brought you back to reality, and you hastily murmured a ‘thanks’ before averting your eyes to the swimming pool where the boy already stood on his block, getting into position.

You unlocked your phone, and turned it horizontally to get the whole view of the pool. Then, you pushed the red button a few seconds before the starting signal was given, and off they went. It was an individual freestyle heat, and it didn’t even take a minute to finish, but it felt so long because you were watching him so intensively, your eyes following him in his lane. He wasn’t in the lead at first, but when he turned around, he quickly diminished the distance between him and the top two swimmers.

“That’s it,” you mumbled under your breath. It was silly, you knew, he couldn’t hear you after all, but it didn’t mean that you didn’t cheer for him loudly when he came in first place.

The arena erupted in loud cheers and applause as everyone was happy to see one of the students win in his category. However, since the girls’ final was still left, you couldn’t move from your place to ask him about his experience. For the school magazine, of course, nothing else.

After the competition came to an end, there was a 30-minute break before the start of the winning ceremony which would be held in the event hall a few minutes away from the sports centre. So you took that time to seek out Anton after checking with him through Kakaotalk that he was free and willing to answer a few of your questions.

The boy’s hair was still half wet when you met him on a bench halfway between the canteen and the student halls. The hustle bustle of the event didn’t reach this side of the campus, but it was still close enough, so he wouldn’t miss the ceremony.

“Hey!” You beamed when you saw him sitting there by himself, his eyes fixated on his phone. He changed into sweatpants and a loose tee, but he still wore his flip-flops. You couldn’t tell whether it was because he forgot to change or because he liked it that way.

“Hi!” Anton greeted you back as he looked up, his lips curling into a half-smile. You could tell that he was tired, but you only had a few questions, so you wouldn’t keep him up too long.

“Congratulations! You did really well. I was truly impressed how you went from third to first place in a matter of seconds,” you shared excitedly, but he just let out a shy little giggle.

“Well… thanks,” he mentioned as he scratched the back of his neck. You just smiled at each other awkwardly until you pulled out your notebook and started asking the questions from him, recording everything on your phone. It was a mere three minutes, so it didn’t take long, but before you would let him go his way, you sent him the video of the finals.

“I’ve taken it, so your parents could see it,” you justified when he just looked back at you with wide, curious eyes. He looked at you as if he couldn’t decipher why you would do such a thing for him even though you thought it wasn’t a big deal. He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it and when he opened it again, his voice was even softer than usual.

“Thanks. That’s… that’s very kind of you,” he admitted, his words uncertain but genuine.

“Anytime,” you shot him a friendly smile before getting to your feet and bidding goodbye. You had to go back to fetch Sullyoon either way.

Your interview with Anton - compiling questions for him before and after his win at the competition - became the article with the most views again, something that you didn’t fail to share with him when it was announced. You couldn’t say that you were friends as per se, but you did ask how his practice went when you bumped into him at the student hall later at night, and he did ask you about how you had been when you met each other by accident in the school corridor. You knew he already had a lot on his plate, so you didn’t seek out his company more than it was necessary, but you still sent stuff his way when something reminded you of him.

However, that did change when senior year rolled by. With the third week of the new term starting came the announcement of the random draw for the annual sports day. KOZ International High’s sports day was your school’s version of ISAC, and even though you were all coming from influential families and all the students had probably enough money to attend the Olympics games in the VIP section, no one complained about the event. In fact, it was all the school magazine and school radio could talk about for weeks, and everyone tried to put effort into practising for their own games to not lose face.

Each year, all the classes participated in four different categories - mixed 4x100 m relay, archery, swimming and dance -, going up against one another within each year. The only category that allowed students to sign up for was dance as only groups could participate, and they needed to be formed in time to seem somewhat professional. Each year, this was the competition everyone was looking forward to the most since usually professional dancers signed up - like Baekseung, Minwoo and Haruto who always won the dance category in your year. For all the other categories, there was a random draw during homeroom where your teacher announced who would be participating in which category. 

This year, Anton didn’t get selected for swimming unlike last year, but you did. You had been selected for relay twice and archery last year, so this was new. Though you knew how to swim and you actually had swimming lessons in freshman year, your competitive side didn’t let you practise just like everybody else now that you were on speaking terms with Anton. So you asked the boy if he could help you prepare for the competition.

“What do you need help with? Technique, breathwork, nutrition or…?” The boy looked at you expectantly when you asked him about helping you out, and you suddenly realised that you had been so wrong that this would be easy, that your request would be obvious.

“Weeeelll, maybe a bit of everything?” You chuckled nervously. “I really want to win this, so whatever can get me there,” you added with a shrug, and Anton seemed slightly amused but also… endeared? Was that the right word for the look he gave you?

Either way, the boy agreed. You thought that he would just watch you swim once to see where you were and what you needed to work on, but he kept asking you when you would practise, so he could come by. He couldn’t always make it because of his own schedule, but he did show up frequently, giving you tips about your posture, technique, timing and little things that you would have not considered paying attention to before (like your post-workout meal).

He was firm in the way he explained certain things, but he was gentle when it came to show you what he meant, especially when he needed to touch you to correct the angle of your arms or the way you turned your head. You could see that swimming was truly his passion, and he was enthusiastic about helping you out, so he probably didn’t think too much into such tutoring, but there were moments when your faces were so close or his skin touched your skin a bit longer than absolutely necessary, and you felt nervous and giddy and warm all at once. He probably did so too because he stuttered or looked away or asked for a break at times like this.

It was usually late at night when you practised in the pool, so there weren’t other students around, and you tried not to be too self-conscious about this whole thing. However, when Andrew came by to practise for his own competition, and you could feel his eyes on you two for a few minutes in the beginning, you felt a bit nervous.

However, when you asked Anton about it after practice that day, sitting on the edge of the pool, your feet grazing the edge of the water, he said that he wasn’t bothered by it.

“Can I ask you something though?” He inquired, looking at you with those curious brown eyes, and you nodded, prompting him to go on.

“Please, don’t take this the wrong way… but why do you want to win the competition so bad?”

“Fair question, really,” you chuckled, airy and light, but sucked in a deep breath before jumping into your explanation. It’s not like it was something to be ashamed of, but you still felt a bit silly for feeling this way. Either way, he deserved to know the truth in exchange for his help.

“I just… I don’t really feel like I’m good at anything here. You know, back in my home country, I was the top student in my class, and at the whole school, too. Here, I’m pretty much average, and as much as I want to say that it doesn’t bother me, it does. There’s always someone who’s better at me in literally everything, so I get joy out of winning anything. Even if it’s our sports day.”

You weren’t sure how someone like Anton who was known for being on the national team would understand what you were feeling, but he seemed to know just the right thing to say.

“You’re good at writing for the school magazine and interviewing people,” he pointed out, his words oozing sincerity. When he looked at you like that and sounded like that, you really did feel good about yourself, but you weren’t sure if he was just trying to make you feel better or he really thought so.

“That’s nice of you to say, but the others are also really good. Minju even won a literary competition.”

To that, he couldn’t say anything. It was a fact. Ever since you had been admitted to KOZ International High, you hadn’t won a single competition. Not that it should have mattered, your parents were happy as it is, but still… going from being known for being smart and an overachiever to being average… it hurt a bit.

“To me, you are the kindest girl I’ve ever met,” the boy confessed gently, quietly, like a secret shared just between you two. “In that sense, you are the first one on my list.”

His words felt warmer than the towel around your body, and you were sure that if you had not just come out of the water a few minutes ago, a blush would surely be creeping onto your face, mirroring your emotions in an obvious way.

“Really?”

“Yeah,” he nodded confidently, but you could see that he was also a bit shy with the way he bit down on his lower lip. A habit that you had picked up on before, but up until now, it didn’t make your heart race.

“But you’ve met so many people, right? I mean, you are an athlete.”

“While it’s true that I’m usually surrounded by a lot of people, I don’t actually know them or take notice of them. For instance, when I’m swimming, I focus on the water, the pool and my body. Nothing else,” he shared willingly, his eyes watching the waves his feet made on the surface of the water. “In a way, a lot of people watch me, but they don’t see me. If that makes sense,” he added a bit belatedly, his voice soft as ever.

You’ve never really thought about his swimming career that way. You’ve thought that he met a lot of people and made a lot of friends and connections, but what he was saying made perfect sense. It also made you feel a bit disheartened because after everything he must have been lonely. His parents didn’t come to see him compete, there was always a buzz around him even if he didn’t want it, and he focused on swimming, nothing else.

This thought made you feel even more thankful because he carved time out of his busy days to help you out, and now he even called you the kindest girl he had ever met.

“They don’t see the real you, I get it,” you hummed, slightly shivering at the way his eyes found yours. “I’m glad that I can see the real you though,” you blurted out without thinking ahead, without thinking at all. It was like you were under a spell; locked down, locked in, unable to move.

In that moment, with the melody of Anton’s coy little giggle accompanying you in the swimming arena, you realised what this feeling meant.

You were in love.

You were both nervous and excited for the sports day.

Swimming was at the end of the day because you had the relay runs first, followed by archery and dancing. You went out to watch the competitions, but since they hired a professional photographer for the event, the school magazine members didn’t need to take pictures. Instead, you enjoyed the event, rooted for Dew in the relay run (and with his impossibly long legs, his team won) and Sullyoon and Minju in dancing. You even checked out archery where Anton came in second place after Carlos.

Then, there was a lunch break and the juries for dancing decided on the ranking before announcing the winners as part of the first winner’s ceremony of the day. The involved students and those who were curious then moved to the arena where each year had its swimming competition for the boys and girls alike. Since you went in class order, the seniors were last, and by the time it was your time to get ready, you had been all nerves.

You didn’t expect Anton to be waiting for you in the corridor between the changing rooms and the pools because he had already sent you a good luck message on Kakaotalk (and you had congratulated him on his second place in archery). However, you couldn’t deny that the sight of the boy was enough to put your mind at ease. For a little while, at least.

“Hi!” Anton greeted you with a friendly smile as you halted in front of him, your sports bag thrown over your shoulder. “I just wanted to come by and see how you were doing.”

“Oh, I’m fine. I’m just…” You let out an awkward little chuckle, suddenly all too aware that your voice was anything but stable. “Okay, I’m gonna be honest. I’m very, very nervous,” you added, biting down on your lower lip. It wasn’t even something that would be marked or kept in your school records, and yet, your heart was pounding so loudly, you were slowly going crazy.

“It’s all okay. I get nervous before competitions, too,” the boy admitted, somewhat of a fond smile playing along his lips while he was looking down at you. You looked back at him, suddenly finding it hard to breathe - not just because of his words, but because of his close proximity. Before, you were rarely aware how close he was, but these last few weeks, that’s all you could think about.

Gosh, you were so gone…

“You do?”

“Yeah, it’s totally normal. Plus, studies say that adrenaline can actually improve performance,” he explained as an attempt to ease your nerves, and you found yourself smiling for the first time in a while.

“No matter what happens, thanks a lot for helping me out. I owe you a whole lot,” you admitted, and playfully nudged his shoulder. You could see that the boy was a bit taken aback by that, but a few seconds later, his features softened even more than already, and his voice was even quieter than usual.

“You don’t owe me anything,” Anton disagreed gently. His eyes were twinkling with care, the lines of his lips deepening his dimples, a sight that made your heart race. Not out of nervousness, but out of this newly bloomed warm and comforting yet thrilling feeling.

You just stood there in the corridor, looking at each other in silence, getting lost in each other’s eyes. This moment was so precious, you wanted to tuck it into your pocket and never let it go. Yet, life moved on around you even if you were still, and the door to the pools opened, the quiet corridor suddenly filled with laughter and chatter.

Suddenly self-conscious, you mumbled something akin to:

“I should probably go. To get changed and to warm up.”

“Yeah, sure,” the boy nodded, but before you could go your way, he reached out to gently pat your head. Only once and only briefly, but you felt electrified from head to toe either way. “Good luck, Y/N! I’m rooting for you!”

And off he went, his cheeks tinted pink, and as you watched him leave, your hands automatically reached for the top of your head where his hand had previously been. You were woken from your stupor only when Dew showed up and started asking what was that between you and Anton. Though you had told Dew how you had been practising with Anton’s guidance, you had never touched upon how you felt around the swimmer.

“I really don’t know,” you blurted out in all honesty, and Dew looked back at you, all confused. “Do boys act like that with just anyone?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Then, why do you think he did that?” You asked, hoping that the Thai boy could help you. He was a boy after all, he should know better. On the other hand, Dew merely shrugged his shoulders.

“My guess would be that he likes you, but don’t ask me about stuff like that. I’ve never had any luck with girls,” he justified before you could ask him (rightfully so) whether boys patted a girl’s head that they liked. You thought that maybe having a guy friend would help with your feelings, but it seemed like it couldn’t have been further from the truth.

Either way, Dew wished you good luck before he left, but all you thought about was Anton and the way he patted your head. Even when you entered the arena later on, you tried to search for him in the spectator area, but to no avail. There were just too many people, and now it made perfect sense why he said that he was surrounded by a lot of people, but he didn’t take note of them or concentrate on them.

So you did the same, and as you stepped onto your block, you took in a deep breath. You mentally played back all the advice the boy had given you, and told yourself that you would do great. Positive affirmations and all that.

After the starting signal, your body moved on auto-pilot. You were so caught up in the moment that you didn’t think, just swam and swam, and gave it your all. You now understood what people meant by your surroundings becoming a blur when something happened so fast because it was over before you knew it.

As you emerged from the water at the end of your lane, you took in a few deep inhales before your eyes found the announcement board. You scanned the screen, but your brain couldn’t comprehend the result, not until Daniela in the lane to your right came up to you to congratulate you.

“Congrats, Y/N!”

“Thanks,” you mumbled, still in a daze because… You looked back at the screen, and oh my gosh, you came in first! You did it! You were the winner in your year!

No one was faster than you to get out of the pool and dry yourself, get changed before heading out with your hair still half-wet, searching for a familiar pair of chocolate-brown eyes. You almost gave up when you spotted him just where he had been before he had wished you good luck.

To be honest, you were in a state of heightened excitement that couldn’t be contained, so you weren’t really in your right mind when you ran up to him and just outright hugged him. He was taller than you, so you momentarily pressed your head against his chest in the embrace, and thought it felt odd and new and everything in between, it also felt so right.

You almost let go of the boy when you noticed how still he was, but then, he had his arms around you (uncertain, gentle yet still there), and whispered, so only you could hear:

“You did really well, Y/N!”

And though it was brief and a bit awkward, it was equally heart-fluttering, and even if you tried to deny that you hugged him because you liked him and not because you were thankful for his help, you were lying.

You were oh so gone.

You still couldn’t get over everything that happened on the sports day, but now that you weren’t practising together and you didn’t need to interview him, you didn’t need to face him over the next few days. It helped a bit because your heart was jumping up and down in joy whenever you thought about his words, his head pat and that hug, and you felt like you could burst with all the different kinds of feelings that he brought out in you.

On the other hand, you promised him right after that impromptu hug that you would like to treat him to something as a token of appreciation for his help, and he didn’t protest. So you settled on the following Saturday, but it seemed like time slowed down because every day dragged on, and it was still not Saturday.

Dew even pointed out that though he was no love expert, you really acted like a girl in love (based on the movies and shows he was watching), and you couldn’t deny it anymore. There were even students who came up to you, asking if you were dating Anton because they had seen you two hugging after the competition. You shooed them away, saying that you were just thankful for him because he had helped you prepare for the competition.

You didn’t want to admit it to strangers, of course, but you also didn’t want them to make up rumours about your relationship. Or well, possible relationship. You didn’t ask Anton if he was approached by the same students, and you didn’t want to admit something that maybe only you felt, putting him in a tough spot.

However, you couldn’t deny that you felt like this encounter would be different… like a date or something. It would be the first time you leave school grounds with Anton, and you knew that he only went out for his practices and the necessities he needed. Though you hang out with Dew off-campus, it was different, he really was just a friend, and you were both clear about that.

Therefore, you spent an ungodly amount of time deciding on an outfit because you didn’t have to wear your school uniform or sportswear this time. You also needed to ask your parents to give you permission to go out because you were underage. It was a fairly smooth process with a whole online system set up where your homeroom teacher got a notification when your parents approved your leave, and you could show the approval on your phone to the guards at the gate.

Due to your indecisiveness, you arrived by the gate exactly at the discussed time, and Anton was already there, leaning against a railing. He wore a dark brown coat, currently unbuttoned, that emphasised his long legs and wide shoulders, with a white shirt and dark jeans. His hands were in his pocket, and he was slightly bobbing his head to the music coming from his headphones. He looked like a campus crush in those shows you liked to indulge yourself in, and the thought didn’t exactly help your crazily racing heart.

You were a few steps away when he opened his eyes and noticed you coming up at him. His lips immediately curled into a shy smile, and he took his headphones off to tuck them into his bag. You reciprocated his smile when you halted beside him, and asked him how he was doing while exiting the school and heading towards the bus stop. He said there was a really good restaurant that he liked going to after practices, so you decided on going there.

When he asked about your week, you felt heat rush to your cheeks because well… it seemed like all you had been doing was playing back the events of the sports day and daydreaming about meeting him today.

“Just the usual, really,” you shrugged instead, covering up your lie with a wider smile as you got on the bus.

You automatically sat down in a loveseat, and though his close proximity shouldn’t have surprised you at this point, you still felt your cheeks burn when he sat down beside you. It was different this time though. No matter how many close moments you had shared before, you had never sat beside each other on the bus, and you had never gone off- campus together, so it was new, it was different, and it was very, very exciting.

“What were you listening to, by the way?” You inquired to break the silence, referring to him waiting for you with his headphones on.

“I have this playlist with songs that I like, so I just put it on shuffle.”

“Can I have a listen?” You asked giddily because you really loved music, and you always enjoyed checking out new songs and new artists. However, Anton seemed a bit surprised by your request, and you immediately added that he didn’t have to if he didn’t feel like it.

“No, no, it’s totally okay. I’ve just never had a girl ask me to let her listen to my playlist,” he let you know, coy as ever, before reaching into his bag. You totally expected him to reach out his headphones for you to take it, but instead, the boy leaned closer to you to put it on you, tucking your hair behind your ear with one hand while holding the headphones in the other.

You found yourself blinking at him rapidly, your heart beating in your throat, and it felt like it was so loud, he could hear exactly how big of an impact his closeness and gentle touch had on you. On the other hand, he didn’t seem affected by it, instead, he boosted a boyish smile when his eyes caught yours, as if he could see right through you.

You could barely register the first song playing because you were still under his spell, but at least you didn’t have to talk for the next few minutes. Anton played a few of the songs on his playlist before it was your stop, and you gave the headphones back to him, sharing your opinion on his song choices while heading towards your destination.

The restaurant he picked was run by a lovely elderly woman who prided herself on the fact that Anton had been coming by ever since he had been a student at KOZ, and how much he had grown over these years. She seemed very fond of the boy and kept sharing stories about him until she was gently reminded by him that you were here to eat.

“Come on! You’ve never brought a girl here, so I have to take advantage of it,” she called him out on it, and Anton’s face immediately flushed, his eyes fixated on the table instead of anything else in the room.

“He helped me prepare for the sports day at school, and I won first place, so I’m treating him to a meal,” you shared with the old lady who directed a knowing smile in the boy’s direction before her eyes settled on yours again.

“Oh, so you’re that girl! He’s been talking so much about you lately.”

“Ah ahjumma,” he groaned slightly, acting like a sulky little kid with his lips curled downwards and his puppy eyes showing. She held up her hands in defeat before taking your orders and getting started on making the food.

Not gonna lie, you felt really good by the fact that you were the only girl Anton brought here and that he had been talking about you lately. Sometimes, you felt like he was just generally shy around others, and while it was true, you were now more hopeful than ever that his actions towards you meant that he felt the same way about you.

So though the meal was amazing and you had a very nice conversation while having lunch, you couldn’t shake this thrilling feeling off, and those so-called butterflies in your stomach didn’t want to chill. Instead, they made you believe it was now or never, this was your chance to make sure while walking in the nearby park, and so you blurted out:

“Anton, can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” he replied calmly, casually, but your next question made him avoid your eyes.

“Would you have said yes to today if it hadn’t been my thank you treat for your help, we just came just because?”

A few seconds of silence settled over the two of you, and the thought crossed your mind that maybe this would not go as you had imagined it. You would be rejected right here and right now, in the middle of this gorgeous park, on this fine Saturday in October, and you would never be able to recover from it.

Instead, the boy halted his steps, and eventually turned towards you, and you automatically did the same.

“Yeah,” he answered in his trademark soft voice, but before you could open your mouth to ask THE question, he beat you to it. “I like you, Y/N.”

Nothing could prepare you for how it would feel to hear those words roll off his tongue - not even this whole week of daydreaming behind you. As the afternoon sunlight shone on him, his eyes seemed to twinkle, and the sight was just too beautiful - he was too beautiful -, you felt like melting under the Sun.

“I like you, too, Anton,” you squealed before you threw your arms around him, and pressed your head against his chest. This time, the boy didn’t hesitate to hug you back, and it was just so heart-shatteringly tender and comforting and soft, your racing heart finally rested.

For it was now not searching for the answer to your question.

A/N: Hope you enjoyed this story of mine! Let me know what you think! 😊

Click here for my RIIZE masterlist!

If you want to read more stories of mine, let it be for RIIZE or for other artists, consider signing up for my taglist here. 🥰

Header taken from the 'Odyssey' trailer video

Hope you have a lovely day/night! Take care! ❤️

[bakuromiii]

★ ˙ ̟ ─── . “distraction ”.

| summary | Haechan was paying attention to everything but what was coming out of your mouth now. | cw | fluff, talkative reader. | a/n | so... is it the same ship or not?

“And you know what else?” you looked at him with raised brows, your eyes glowing with excitement, happiness, and curiosity. “The Ship of Theseus.”

“The Ship of Theseus?” he repeated, a small smile dancing on his lips as he watched you.

He’d been sitting there on the couch for a while now, elbow resting on the backrest, cheek nestled in the palm of his hand, just listening to you ramble with a kind of captivated patience. In the past hour alone, he’d learned that octopuses have three hearts (each with a different function), that you shouldn’t boil water in the microwave, and that there’s a post office underwater in the Bahamas. That, and a dozen other strange little facts you’d gathered from the corners of the internet or your own imagination.

And now, somehow, you’d segued into philosophical thought experiments and “what if” hypotheticals—What if the internet shut down globally? What if black holes contained entire civilizations? What if you and he were enemies in an alternate reality? What if the person who invented ice cream… hadn’t?

No matter the topic, he loved hearing you talk. Even when you drifted into “If I were a zombie, I’d eat your brains first” territory, it was always entertaining. Time moved differently around you—faster, lighter. Especially when you were on one of your rolls, your brain and mouth fully activated, like you could talk forever.

“So here’s the thing,” you continued, eyes bright. “Theseus’s ship has thirty planks. As he travels, the planks start to rot, so he replaces them, one by one, until eventually, none of the original planks remain. So… is it still Theseus’s ship? Or is it a completely different ship?”

“Hmm, interesting question,” he hummed, pretending to ponder deeply for a few seconds before adding, “What do you think?” That was the magical sentence.

“Glad you asked!” your eyes lit up instantly, as if you’d just been waiting for the invitation to dive deeper. “We have to ask ourselves: what actually makes Theseus’s ship his ship? If we say it isn’t the same ship after replacing all the planks, then how many planks need to be changed before it becomes something else? Like, where’s the line?”

Your hands moved as you spoke, passion flooding your tone. “And think about us. Our body cells change every day. Some die, others regenerate. Does that mean we’re a completely different person over time? Or are we still ‘us’ even after all that change?”

“Hmm, difficult question,” he nodded thoughtfully, watching as you nodded back with enthusiastic agreement. “So this ties back to what you said about what makes a thing that thing, right?”

“Exactly! I’m getting there,” you giggled, visibly delighted. “So, some philosophers say that…”

He stayed quiet, listening as you rambled on, occasionally nodding or humming to show he was still with you. And he was—just not exactly in the way you'd think.

At some point during your monologue, he stopped focusing on your words and started focusing on you.

The way your brows furrowed at each contradiction, the way your smile bloomed when you hit on an idea you found satisfying, the way your hands waved through the air in wide, expressive gestures, it all captivated him. But more than that, what really got him was how free you looked. How natural. How completely yourself you were around him.

It wasn’t just about the random facts or philosophical tangents. It was the way you trusted him with every thought that passed through your mind—like you wanted to let him in on the world inside your head.

And god, he loved it.

He loved the way your eyes sparkled when you got excited, how your voice picked up speed like it couldn't wait to catch up to your thoughts. He loved the little creases that formed between your brows when you were deep in explanation, and how you'd pause only to grin when you realized he was still watching you, really watching you.

“—and that’s why some argue identity is more about continuity of function than physical components,” you continued, eyes bright, hands still moving, completely immersed in your train of thought. “But that was only one of the theories. There’s another one that…”

You trailed off when your eyes met his again.

There it was, that warm, soft gaze, like he was looking at the most precious thing in the whole world. His eyes almost pulsed, like hearts of their own, and his lips curled into an enamored smile that made your chest flutter… but also…

Yeah. That was definitely the look of someone who hadn’t heard a single word you’d said in the last five minutes.

“Hyuck… you’re not listening to me, are you?” you deadpanned, crossing your arms as you started to sulk.

He laughed, not even trying to deny it. “Yeah, I’m not.”

“At least you’re honest,” you muttered, eyebrows knitting together, a pout already forming on your lips.

“I was too distracted,” he added, and that soft tone again, like he was speaking more to himself than to you.

“You could’ve just said you weren’t interested,” you said, eyes dropping to the side, voice quiet and maybe even little wounded.

Another chuckle escaped him, even softer this time, as he scooted closer. Gently, he cupped your face, coaxing you to meet his gaze again.

"I am interested," he said, voice lower now, more sincere. "Just... more in you than in what you were saying.”

God, how he loved looking at you up close like this, close enough to take in every single detail of your pretty face, from the curve of your lips to the spark in your eyes.

“Plus, you can’t really be mad at me,” he added with a playful grin, pinching your cheeks lightly before gently squishing them between his hands. “I did listen to everything you said, up until a few minutes ago.”

He tilted his head, eyes softening again.

“I don’t know about Theseus’s ship,” he murmured, “but I do know you’ll be mine forever… no matter what parts change.”

You blinked a few times at the sudden declaration. If he was trying to make you less mad with such a ridiculous statement… well, damn it—it was working.

“That was so cheesy, oh my God,” you said, your tone lighter, a smile creeping onto your lips despite your best efforts. You didn’t look mad anymore. As stupid and over-the-top as it was, your heart was doing those annoying, giddy flips that you pretended not to notice.

He laughed, clearly pleased with himself, then leaned in to press a kiss to the corner of your lips. “What? I’m just showing you that I love you,” he said, the smirk on his face growing as he pressed another kiss, this time to your cheek.

You tried your best to hold a straight face, but the warmth of his words (and those sweet kisses) were melting away your sulk faster than you'd ever admit.

“You’re so annoying,” you muttered, a small smile betraying your attempt to sound irritated.

“And yet,” he said, stealing one more kiss, this time right on your lips, “you love me anyway.”

You rolled your eyes, but didn’t pull away. “Yeah, yeah… lucky you.”

His grin only grew wider, because yeah, he was.

↝ taglist: @nebularsung, @spacejip, @peterm4rker, @sinisxtea.

[bakuromiii]

jaehyun x reader (fem) dandelion

────୨ৎ────

jaehyun who really loves his girl.

he spent months building up a solid friendship with you before asking you out. jaehyun who sends you flowers every saturday morning when he’s away and loves you more than anything.

now he loves his girls . all three of you now. both your daughters being a spitting image of you , from your hair to your smile. but they didn’t miss out on the jeong dimple genes.

after your second daughter was born, he was asked when you’d be trying for a son. and he waved them off thinking how he couldn’t even imagine life as anything other than tea parties every sunday. him squeezing into a small rapunzel chair sipping imaginary tea with your youngest while your eldest put bows into his hair.

makeovers with the girls before he has to put on his actual makeup before a show, him telling them they could be his actual makeup artist someday since they’re doing so good. jaehyun who can’t help but smile everytime he hears the pitter patter of the girls walking to your shared room in the morning. mornings filled with kisses on the cheeks and making breakfast together. him holding both the girls on his hips while you shape the pancakes into hearts.

people had asked him about who would carry on his family name, but jaehyun knows his girls carry your kindness of heart, his humbleness, and both your kids being proof love will always live on. your beautiful qualities instilled into your daughters will live past a last name.

────୨ৎ────

this was soooo self indulgent #sorry

[bakuromiii]

 。ﾟ☆: 𝙗𝙖𝙠𝙪𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙞𝙞'𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙗𝙧𝙖𝙧𝙮 :☆ﾟ.

*.☽ .* previously known as donkey-hyuck!

*.☽ .* i only write for nct/riize! - i will NOT be writing for moon taeil but i WILL be writing for hong seunghan.

*.☽ .* most previous works (before 2021) will not be here.

*.☽ .* find my navi here!

˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊ 『𝐍𝐂𝐓』

✎ᝰ. 𝙟𝙖𝙚𝙝𝙮𝙪𝙣

✎ᝰ. 𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙠

✎ᝰ. 𝙙𝙤𝙣𝙝𝙮𝙪𝙘𝙠

✎ᝰ. 𝙟𝙖𝙚𝙢𝙞𝙣

✎ᝰ. 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚!

⋆.ೃ࿔*:· 『𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒』

✎ᝰ. RUP·TURE — /ˈrəpCHər/ (noun) [THE MASTERLIST]

˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊ 『𝐑𝐈𝐈𝐙𝐄』

✎ᝰ. 𝙣𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙮𝙚𝙩!

⋆.ೃ࿔*:· 『𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒』

✎ᝰ. RUP·TURE — /ˈrəpCHər/ (noun) [THE MASTERLIST]

[bakuromiii]

。ﾟ☆: 𝙗𝙖𝙠𝙪𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙞𝙞'𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙗𝙧𝙖𝙧𝙮 :☆ﾟ.

*.☽ .* previously known as donkey-hyuck!

*.☽ .* i only write for nct/riize! - i will NOT be writing for moon taeil but i WILL be writing for hong seunghan.

*.☽ .* most previous works (before 2021) will not be here.

✎ᝰ. 𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙠𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙞𝙖 ⤵

INTRODUCTION- ice skaters and roller skaters are sworn enemies, right? has anyone even heard of that? in your small town, the two biggest leagues are the dream team (a.k.a. the dreamies), a group containing roller skating performers, and the winter wonders (a.k.a. the WW), a group containing figure skating performers. the two teams never liked each other and always competed with their own wins, bragging about who won which competition and all. but what their teammates don’t know is that you and na jaemin had been crushing on each other since who knows when. but this all comes down to the last competition of the winter when a drunk jaemin spits out his huge crush on you at a mutual friends party. yeah, you both got into quite a lot of trouble after that.

✎ᝰ. 𝙪𝙣𝙣𝙖𝙢𝙚𝙙

✎ᝰ. 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚!

[bakuromiii]

。ﾟ☆: 𝙗𝙖𝙠𝙪𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙞𝙞'𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙗𝙧𝙖𝙧𝙮 :☆ﾟ.

*.☽ .* previously known as donkey-hyuck!

*.☽ .* i only write for nct/riize! - i will NOT be writing for moon taeil but i WILL be writing for hong seunghan.

*.☽ .* most previous works (before 2021) will not be here.

✎ᝰ. [00:00 a.m.]

✎ᝰ. [7:16 a.m.]

✎ᝰ. ALWAYS WILL BE

✎ᝰ. 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚!

[bakuromiii]

。ﾟ☆: 𝙗𝙖𝙠𝙪𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙞𝙞'𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙗𝙧𝙖𝙧𝙮 :☆ﾟ.

*.☽ .* previously known as donkey-hyuck!

*.☽ .* i only write for nct/riize! - i will NOT be writing for moon taeil but i WILL be writing for hong seunghan.

*.☽ .* most previous works (before 2021) will not be here.

✎ᝰ. [12:00 p.m.]

✎ᝰ. [00:00 a.m.]

✎ᝰ. 𝙚𝙣𝙞𝙜𝙢𝙖 - part i. → part ii.

✎ᝰ. '23 𝙗𝙞𝙧𝙩𝙝𝙙𝙖𝙮 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡

✎ᝰ. 𝙧𝙤𝙘𝙠𝙡𝙖𝙣𝙙 - 『𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙍𝙐𝙋𝙏𝙐𝙍𝙀𝘿 𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨』 ⤵

INTRODUCTION - in which these sorrowful feelings hit you both harder than you had initially thought.

✎ᝰ. 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚!

[bakuromiii]

 。ﾟ☆: 𝙗𝙖𝙠𝙪𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙞𝙞'𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙗𝙧𝙖𝙧𝙮 :☆ﾟ.

*.☽ .* previously known as donkey-hyuck!

*.☽ .* i only write for nct/riize! - i will NOT be writing for moon taeil but i WILL be writing for hong seunghan.

*.☽ .* most previous works (before 2021) will not be here.

✎ᝰ. 𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 ⤵

INTRODUCTION- you were his everything, as was he to you…. in which jaehyun recalls all the moments he’s spent with you and his daughter. a lifetime of endearment and a lifetime of his little family. a lifetime full of never ending love <3.

✎ᝰ. 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙤𝙩𝙩𝙤𝙢 - 『𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙍𝙐𝙋𝙏𝙐𝙍𝙀𝘿 𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨』 ⤵

INTRODUCTION - getting into a relationship when you were at the lowest point of your life dragged you down to the bottom. but it dragged the ones you loved as well.

✎ᝰ. 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚!

[bakuromiii]

going through a clean out and rebrand!🤗

(also gonna make a carrd to help me yall navigate)

[bakuromiii]

⁀➷⊹ ࣪ ˖~ THE LA LA LOVE SERIES .ᐟ

introducing the la la love series ── a collection that celebrates your lucky love surrounding valentine's day

💭

♡ MARK LEE ⁀➷⊹

MY GIRL .ᐟ

prologue. "i think i'd rather wait for someone i want to say yes to,"

pairing. shyboy!mark x popular!reader

synopsis. in which mark has apparently claimed you in his heart, and to no one other than his friends. hiding his feelings thinking that he didn't have a chance, he gets extremely jealous when someone tries to ask you out for valentine's day. you're his girl.

♡ HUANG RENJUN ⁀➷⊹

SOMETHING NEW .ᐟ

prologue. "guessing you're not here for pink heart cookies?"

pairing. barista!renjun x burntout!reader

synopsis. tired of all of the valentine spirit at your usual coffee shop, you try a different one a little further from your campus. a less populated, more mellow place, and there you meet huang renjun. you were never one to believe in things like love at first sight; until you met him. all it took was one cup of coffee.

♡ LEE JENO ⁀➷⊹

CLASS CRUSH .ᐟ

prologue. “my brain just goes blank when i look at you…”

pairing. collegeTA!jeno x student!reader

synopsis. in which your shy and reserved TA from your literature class started acting a little different. harboring a crush on you for months, he finally gets the courage to confess to you…on valentine’s day.

♡ LEE DONGHYUCK ⁀➷⊹

BURNT HEARTS .ᐟ

prologue. "..you in the kitchen? with an oven?...that's on?"

pairing. sweetheart!donghyuck x baker!reader

synopsis. lee donghyuck never stepped foot in a kitchen for more than a midnight snack, but for valentine's day he is determined to bake something for you-the campus's best baker and the girl who stole his heart without even trying. when things don't go as he planned, he still shows up armed with charm.

♡ NA JAEMIN ⁀➷⊹

YOU WIN .ᐟ

prologue. "i don't always win, but i promise you i will this time..."

pairing. varsity!jaemin x photographer!reader

synopsis. in which jaemin has been pining after you and makes you a deal. if he wins the valentine's day basketball game, you have to go out with him. you agreed, but you knew you didn't like him like that. at least that's what you've been telling yourself.

♡ ZHONG CHENLE ⁀➷⊹

PERFECT EXCUSE .ᐟ

prologue. "..us. you. me. valentine's day fair,"

pairing. playful!chenle x perfectionist!reader

synopsis. you never cared much for valentine's day. it's not that you needed to, because school was more important. however, when you get roped into a (stupid) day at the valentine's day fair, with the annoyingly charming zhong chenle, maybe your perspective will change.

♡ PARK JISUNG ⁀➷⊹

LOVE BET .ᐟ

prologue. "pfft, you'll be crying into your wallet by next week,"

pairing. bestfriend!jisung x bestfriend!reader

synopsis. you and your bestfriend jokingly make a bet that whoever doesn't get a valentine has to pay for dinner at you guys' favorite restaurant, which is quite expensive. as valentine's day approaches, you both realize that you don't exactly like the idea of the other person going out with someone..

💭 j.note. hi luvvs!! i am so so so excited for this series to come out! i really hope you guys are looking forward to it and they will becoming out one by one starting february 7th! i figured i'd post the masterlist first so that you guys can get the feel and yeah! i hope you enjoy them, and until then if you would like to be added to the taglist (if anyone) just comment! <3

[bakuromiii]

cr: silverlinning (twt)

[bakuromiii]

Project 2025 ain't gonna roll out all at once. So what we're gonna wanna do is make passing each individual part of it as difficult as possible, so there's less to undo once we finally get this country back on the rails.

[bakuromiii]

so incredibly speechless

This is a reminder to:

Never mention a possible pregnancy/abortion to anyone, especially not through a social media app messaging service such as messenger, WhatsApp, Instagram DMs, Snapchat, etc.

Delete all period tracking apps and to start tracking using a planner or physical calendar

Book appointments for a form of birth control if possible, or to always carry condoms for yourself and other

Look into sterilization options if that is the route you want to go down (here is a list of 1000 doctors willing to sterilize you without a fight)

Protect your fellow person, protect the women in your life, the queer people, the disabled people, everyone will be affected by this

Form communities. Tell your people that you love them. Protect one another. Check in on one another. None of us are alone.

[bakuromiii]

SM is known to hold onto their artists during their scandals for as long as possible so for Taeil to be immediately kicked out of the group following the reports of him being involved in a horrible crime, the consequences must be very severe. while we don’t know the details of the crime, we could imagine they’re very extreme.

as a nctzen since 2016, I was disappointed and repulsed by the news of Taeil being involved in such crimes. I considered NCT my safe space and my form of escapism from reality for 8 years not knowing that one of the members was involved in crimes that harm women. never in my wildest dreams did I ever think an NCT member would be linked to a crime that harms their target demographic. it truly disgusts me thinking about how deeply involved he was in for him to be investigated by the police.

I hope fans who read this do not defend Taeil. he is a grown man who made the decision to be involved in a crime so horrific, I cannot and will never understand the people who would go out of their way to defend him. he needs to face the consequences for his crimes. victims of sx crimes have to live with the pain and trauma for the rest of their lives while perpetrators continue harming others. defending him just tells me you condone such behaviour, normalising the harm and ab*se of women. that needed to stop a long time ago and it needs to stop now.

men who involve themselves in sx crimes are one of the reasons why the world is a dangerous place for women. men like this are the reason we are afraid of men. men like this should not be able to walk freely and continue the cycle of harming others. men time and time again have proven that they’re trash.

please believe the victims. I hope they get all the justice they deserve and I hope they know we are here to support them.

[bakuromiii]

in light of the taeil situation, i will be removing all reference of him on this blog as soon as i am able.

what he has done is abhorrent, and the fact that someone i’ve supported and held in such high regard for so many years could cause such horrid pain and destruction to this young woman’s life is so upsetting. i hope the victim can heal from this and receives all of the support she deserves. in a similar vein i hope that taeil feels the full force of the law and faces the consequences he deserves.

i also hope that any of my followers who are affected by this issue in particular are doing okay.

[bakuromiii]

gn reader

—————

~ there’s something in the way you miss people.

no matter the distance, your heart will always long for the one you call home. the reminiscence of each breath jaemin has ever had within your presence stays glued to your mind. every laugh, every word, and every scent screams na jaemin in every being within you.

it’s heartbreaking, really— how much you miss na jaemin for being away. but who could blame you? no one could ever tear you apart. there’s no other being like him that could ever exist in your lifetime. he’s your everything.

but when it’s time for him to go, you hold on to everything that he’s ever had. he is your comfort. he is your person.

there’s so much confiding through a screen and although it cannot compete with being face-to-face, it works. it works just enough as you count down the days, hours, and minutes until you get to see the love of your life. the virtual kisses are, in the end, worth it.

oh, but when you finally get to see his face in person there’s no other thing that could bring you more joy than the man of your dreams.

there’s something poetic in the way you share your love.

it may sound fictional but you’re so loved in all of the right ways that life just feels euphoric.

he’s your whole. unwholly in the way that he loves you. it’s overwhelming yet brings you down to earth and grounds you. he grounds you. in the utmost beautiful way he can possibly think of.

na jaemin loves you— that much is obvious. but even he is unaware of how much he truly loves you. he says his heart is full of you, but really it’s overflowing with passion and energy.

the way you hold him, the way you console him, and the way you speak to him is forever engraved into his soul. truly, you are more than soulmates.

he is unable to formalize the right words that describe you and your relationship to each other. he’s just forever yours. he always will be.

there’s something fulfilling in the way you both live your lives.

you are your own being and na jaemin is his own. so independently beautiful and yet so powerfully connected together, you and jaemin take on the world. there’s no one else better for this position. your love for each holds emotions so maturely and meticulously handled by the golden chain that connects the pure red of your beating hearts.

both canonically infatuated with every fiber of everything that you are. there are thousands of words upon words that you both share and at the end of the day ‘i love you’ is what you need to hear the most. it’s the most important.

you can’t ever forget any moment shared between you and na jaemin because he is the most special person to every exist in your universe. in any universe.

you’re so incredibly lucky to find someone who loves you, cares for you, and is willing to be the best version of himself for you. na jaemin takes care of you in ways you can’t even comprehend.

na jaemin loves you in which words cannot describe. both as a human being and as his lover, he’ll forever pour out his gratitude for being able to grow with you.

those are the ways in which this life has chosen to gently grasp you in every way you deserve. starting with na jaemin as your guide. and you, his.

—————

hi i wanted to write something poetic and soul crushing (in a good way for once.) hopefully this is enough :)