bipolarwave

[bipolarwave]

some sort of love poem

[bipolarwave]

Graveyard Music Video Theory

Ok you guys bare with me, my imagination is legit too much right now.

Some important things from the Graveyard video that I would like to highlight to support my theory are as below;

Note the changing of time at the beginning of the video. In a manic state, time legit flies by without recollection at times. Not to mention it’s a subtle reference to the fact that this is her third album. Because of this noticeable time jump at the beginning of the video, it’s safe to say that the video starts off with her in a manic state. Hence the colorfulness of the room, the childlike decorations and the way she’s dressed. Not to mention, if you pay close attention you’ll see, “Ashley” has no tattoos in the beginning. Ashley is in her purest form ( freckles showing, curly hair , no tattoos, and no makeup ) 

Keep reading

[bipolarwave]

But what was I going to say to you anyway. The grass is in your belly and the high sun can’t spit through the leather that you’re growing on the back of your arms. Armadillos are segmented, you know, so they can slide plate tectonics skin. 

“It’s not worth it.” Shove phone and hands into pockets. Knuckles wrinkle pink.

I pretend I am brave when really I am writing and deleting a snapchat that would have been “a bit much”. You pretend you’re relaxed when really the back of your eyes has a hunger that never stops its ache.

I ask you what’s up, you say, “In space there is no such thing as up.” I say that our current orientation would suggest, you interrupt, “The sun,” I say, ha ha, very funny.

You say, “Do you hear that?” Put a hand on the train rail. “It’s humming.” I say so let’s get out of the way, you say, “Hang on.” I say okay but my mom will be mad at you if I die and I can’t make it home in time to defrost the chicken. You stare at the place the train is supposed to be coming. 

“It’s always like this.” You’re shaking. I don’t ask for clarification. Look at you out of the side of my eye, just in case you take flight. You live from a pressed space. Calling a crack in the door a freedom, all strung like a harp, ready to be used but resenting the fingers. God forbid you slip. There’s nowhere for you to fall in your house. Never knew a bed that wasn’t made in bile. Got used to high prices.

I say. If we get hit by a train do you think we still have to take finals. 

You say: “I’m exhausted.” 

It comes out all soft. Half lost between us and the wind and something coming. What dies in my throat comes scrambled in thoughts. Try not to let you slip when it’s one of the only times you’ve been actually honest. I want to tell you about the day I woke up and apples tasted different. About how I don’t know the last time I laughed and actually meant it. 

I want to say I believe in a better sky. A wrist that turns up and the path of my blood that only looks like branches. A nest I can build out of soft words and silky hair. Use my own teeth to grind down the gravestones and call that interior decorated. I want to say that you’re allowed to collapse. That not all barbed wire needs to be crafted into cocoons. That we can take what is shaping us and shape it back, turn a spear into a sparrow and say we forgive hollow for the weight it hands us. I want to say I’ve been thrown out of the back of a car too and I know the road you’re on by the very skin of me, but I also know: when I was six I thought I could speak to trees. Sometimes when it’s sunny and I tilt my head back, you know. You know. I still feel warm.

I want to say it’s worth it for the six year old in us. Or the sixty year old. Or for being sixteen and actually laughing. You ever taste a dorito with peanut butter? So that’s that then. Something worth looking forward to. And when you finish that, come back. I want you to try to jump out of your own shadow. Or learn to ice skate. Or finish the book you’re writing. Forget about good enough. Forget about forcing it. Forget about worth. The worth is just you, and your tastebuds, and magnets, and new colors, and finding grasshoppers, and radio stations. When you’re done with it all, come back. I have more. A whole earth.

But what do I say. You’re tilted so close to the edge that a wing and a wound feel the same.

Just this, in our silence: I give you my hand. We get out of the way of the train.

[bipolarwave]

Right now, there are people all over the world who are just like you. They're lonely. They're missing somebody. They are in love with someone they probably shouldn't be in love with. They have secrets you wouldn't believe. They wish, dream, hope, and they look out the window whenever they're in the car or on a bus or a train & they watch the people on the streets & wonder what they've been through. They wonder if there are people out there like them. They're like you & you could tell them everything & they would understand. You're never alone.

[bipolarwave]

trust

/trəst/

(noun)

1 the walls so thin you can feel the beating in their veins. i lay awake, thank you universe, for walls dont talk. they know my secrets. they know more about me than i do.

2 too much pressure, i am sure. they see you doing good they will expect more. they see you not doing so well they will not expect at all. life is way much easier without expectations, so what do you expect?

3 mother said there was a scream coming from the dark of my room. i told her that there was no one there, that she was probably delutional. there was indeed nobody, it wasnt me, it wasnt anyone. game over, my demons took over. i am sorry i am such a turnoff for all the light that still remains.

4 i dont wanna be them. i dont wanna be me.

5 i am just the underdog, the little wolf out the pack. they say i smell like blood and i have terrible senses. a tribid. abomination.

6 i have stopped making wishes, not long ago. the world breaks, shatters, destroys. faith and belief are the pieces on the ground, if only there were still something to gravitate towards to.

7 who am i, really?

7/15/19 // 3.17AM

–erikanovianty

[bipolarwave]

LORA MATHIS

‘If There’s A Way Out I’ll Take It’ by @lora-mathis;

original photos and edit

[bipolarwave]

“You only really wanted me when your life felt empty. And I wanted you in rush hour traffic, a room full of people, even through all the noise.”

— Chloë Frayne

[bipolarwave]

Halsey’s speech at the Blossom Ball 2018

[bipolarwave]

Well, that’s good, isn’t it? Isn’t that what you wanted?

[bipolarwave]

Discover Magnetips, the magnetic pens. Get more information here

[bipolarwave]

jughead jones lockscreen

like or reblog if you save

don’t repost

[bipolarwave]

She can be sad even when she’s happy. She can be lonely even when she’s loved. She felt things deeply. It was both her blessing and her curse.

Juansen Dizon (via juansendizon)

[bipolarwave]

hey guys I would really appreciate the support on my new youtube video. please smash the like button & subscribe to my channel.

re-blog & I will follow you!

[bipolarwave]

Love breaks my bones and I laugh.

Charles Bukowski

[bipolarwave]

My therapist asked me to create something “motivating” so I made these.

lol.

[bipolarwave]

If there is a book you want to read but isn’t written yet, write it.

Shel Silverstein (b. 25 September 1930)