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𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐱𝐢𝐜 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬...𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 I lose around 50 kg last time I was admitted bc of my last suicide attempt since then I'm doing lots of exercise but my eyes just see the way my disfuctional Brain knows himself a big, fat, ugly, dismorphic body with lots of Scar tissues over his neck, belly, arms, legs, wrist

I really wish someday this shit ends, I'm really tired of feeling this way

Medicine, psychotherapy, rehab, drugs as any other shit doesn't help at all

Ive been four times in a psychiatric hospital in Culiacán and four times been in rehab last time I cut my neck with a razor blade as deep as I could but here I am fuck I have nothing I used to be a well know physician in CDMX I was doing a major but self sabotage is kinda my specialty or maybe is the only fuckin thing I know to do well who cares I'm writing to vent cause everytime I open tumblr, Twitter or install I just see people who knows how to live but fuck man I was the most interesting smart guy at college and look at me rn at my 33 yo no money, no girlfriend, a shitty ass mental disease that probably everyone knew about it but not me

Fuck, I just vent some shit here cause I have no one to talk to, sorry about my English is not my native language but I rather write to talk with...