bpdmaeborowski
Nightmare Eyes
My bpd side blog. Nothing more to it than that. Will be mainly used when I get my Moments(c)/Episodes(c). Will sometimes just vent just cause. idc this is my blog.
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Fucking Pianoman piece of shit ruining my day what a fucking asshole I hope he fucking dies in a hole alone fucking bitch ass fucker
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Rly in the process of a small but for sure mental breakdown
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#frisx txt#college got me so depressed#accounting got me so depressed#I hate my life I hate my parents#this major is so stupid this business division I'm in is so stupid#I DONT WANT TO BE HETE#HERE
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I have seasonal depression but only in the spring bec I love the winter so much
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mmmmmmm BOI guess who got so stressed out abt college they decided to impulse buy a steam card for a game THIS GALLLLLLL
#bpd#actuallyborderline#actuallybpd#frisx txt#MMMMMM i wasnt gonna buy it but then college had to be Like That(c)#so im gonna buy night in the woods to calm down
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A lot of people will tell me that I'm a good person, sometimes I just don't believe that
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Idk
#frisx txt#idk if this is bpd or not but this is sort of like my vent blog so whatever#sometimes I'm not sure if I'm a cis girl a trans boy or NB#like I feel like I'm one but when I'm feeling better I'm like nah jk#and like idk food lol
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Throughout the weekend I kept telling myself to go outside in the middle of the night and take a walk even if it was dangerous, even hoping that someone was gonna come out and attack me or something cuz I just wanted to fight someone... I've just been so angry all weekend and wanted to let out that anger somehow
#bpd#actuallyborderline#actuallybpd#frisx txt#negative#I never got that walk Bec I was always tired#literally I've been struggling with controlling my emotions all weekend#and during finals week too I'm so fucked
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Swallowing your anger sometimes is needed.
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just neurodivergent things: subconsciously having different personalities around people and being like me @ me: chill dude
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Concept: I can face a minor inconvenience or fuck up without having a complete crisis over it
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my entire life consists of me going “yeah im probably a piece of shit but ill worry about that later so i can sleep soundly at night”
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Conversation
Me @ myself: why the hell are you still tired? You slept for 10 hours. Get your shit together
BPD: because we are a worthless POS who doesn't deserve to walk the earth.
Me: valid. Carry on.
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me: i am the worst honestly im so terrible why do i exist
also me: i am absolutely flawless. you are all so lucky to have met me. youre blessed to have me in your life
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another fun bpd thing: taking “"trivial”“ things to the extreme
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Me: -breathes- god I’m so manipulative
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me @ my brain: please stop that impulsive self-destructive shit you will literally get us killed
my brain:
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