#bpd

[shapeshiftingsinner]

i’m alone. i have absolutely nobody left. everyone else is keeping distance. distance means hatred. distance is the same as if you cut me off completely.

i’m so empty.

i have nothing.

[bpdohwhatajoy]

I feel like a walking inconvenience

[cluster-b-culture-is]

Cluster B culture is feeling and knowing people are hiding something from you on purpose when they get all sweet, lovey dovey, supportive and concerned, because that's the only time anybody treats you like a human being.

You give them the benefit of the doubt while convincing yourself it's just your PD.

It never is.

.

[disabledprincesses]

Men seeking help for their behavioral issues: I have the urge to hurt those around me and act out whenever I am told no. I can't control my emotions and need help learning reality versus fantasies when it comes to scenarios and intentions of those around me. I feel pain and want to give pain.

Doctors: haha yea I remember what it was like to be a teen boy, just stay outta trouble, maybe join a sport to get out all that energy, have fun!

Women seeking help for their behavioral issues: Sometimes I have angry thoughts tha-

(Visual ID: a screenshot from Sponge-bob Square-pants of a security guard fish throwing mrs. Puff into a yellow padded room while she is in a straight jacket. End ID)

[bl0w-m3]

Realistic “day in the life” of someone with BPD:

-cry because you’re the worst person in the world

-smoke

- stop crying because you’re literally a god and nothing can ever make you upset again

-repeat

[dizzylifes]

Life feels like an endless circle of pain

[angelnumber27]

My mind immediately after I say anything to anyone:

“They don’t care. That was fucking stupid.”

[cluster-b-culture-is]

Cluster b culture is not being able to say no because you weren't a human growing up you were an accessory designed to say yes to everything.

.

[abusedpixie]

𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐬𝐤 𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐠𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐯𝐨𝐢𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐈'𝐦 𝐞𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐮𝐩 𝐬𝐡𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚��𝐝 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠

“𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰“

[forrest-faee]

“I am so sorry for hurting you while I was trying to hurt myself.”

[bl0w-m3]

Nobody is afraid to lose me. I never mean that much.

[bittenborderline]

Please I just want to feel fucking safe and looked after I’m so sick of being terrified

[hardeningmyheart]

liability by lorde.

[cluster-b-culture-is]

Cluster b culture is having to constantly convince yourself you’re not a monster for just begging to be loved the way you deserve, fuck I’m so tired, I’m not abusive for wanting to spend time with you! I’m not abusive for not trusting you after what you did with her. I’m not abusive for staying up until 1AM crying because I can’t possibly take being cheated on again. I’m not abusive for yelling at you after I found out you were posting nudes of yourself in my bathroom mirror on your private Snapchat story. I’m not abusive for just wanting to be loved and cared about and safe.

.

[borderlinebastard]

what “feeling better” can look like after using a coping technique:

beng able to get up and walk around safely

thinking/talking more clearly and lessening of brain fog

a willingness to re-engage with a situation/emotion (even with some reluctance)

ability to do a task you did not want to/could not do before

being able to plan and problem solve (even if you still don’t know what to do)

improved concentration/focus

more understanding of a situation

calmer and slower thoughts (rather than scattered thoughts/rumination)

slower heartbeat and breathing

faster heartbeat, if doing exercise, and momentum that gives you a chance to do a task before you sit down again

being able to sleep easier

an ability to look at the big picture and not get lost in the details

feeling that you can “manage”

ability to control outbursts/destructive behaviour or pause before acting

managing to stop crying

I think people tend to assume their mood is what will improve after trying coping techniques, however, your mood is not the full extent of your mental health, and it doesn’t totally define whether or not a technique has helped you. When disorders cause symptoms like chronic emptiness and low mood, it’s worthwhile to pay attention to your body and your abilities to look for signs of improvement, which can then have an affect on your mood in the long term.

[honeypleasejustkillme]

why is it so hard for me to believe that someone actually cares about me and isn’t always going to replace me at any given moment