captainmactaggart

[captainmactaggart]

What is Jaws' star sign?

Being that Jaws’ birthday is October 9th, her star sign would be Libra. Though to be honest, I didn’t know that until looking it up just now. To paraphrase from the site I found this out from:

[Libras are] well-known for a serious, thoughtful and selfless demeanor. They genuinely enjoy helping others, and often find themselves taking any opportunity to do so. Libras are great at providing a patient and non-judgmental ear for friends and loved ones, allowing them to sort through their problems in a comfortable setting. These qualities make them a highly valued friend, especially when it is obvious that they’re putting the needs of others above their own.

Which sounds about right for Jaws, so maybe I already knew this on a subconscious level. Who knows...

[captainmactaggart]

Welcome to the SPCM Blog!

People of the Earth (and surrounding districts), welcome to the official Space Pirate Captain MacTaggart blog and website! We hope you’ll enjoy your visit to this site, run and maintained by the creator of the series himself, Craig Black. Here you can find out about the characters, read their stories, and keep up with the latest developments. There’s also bound to be lots of other random stuff that we post whenever it takes our fancy.

Whether this is your first time visiting our site, or you’ve been here before, we want to make sure you have the most enjoyable and convenient experience possible, so apart from this blog, there are seven pages you can access:

THE STORY This page gives you the general gist of the whole story of SPCM, and tells you what to expect should you choose to go further.

THE HEROES Here you can find out more about the heroes of our story, from Captain MacTaggart herself to members of her crew, and other friends besides them.

THE VILLAINS Here you can find out more about the main villains of our piece, from Commander Barratt of the Stellar Federation, to Princess Midori of the Empire.

THE MECHA This page showcases some of the starships and other craft which play a vital role in the story of SPCM - along with a fair few others that don’t.

THE PLANETS This page showcases just a handful of the planets and moons encountered on our journey through the series - again, including a few which don’t actually appear.

THE EPISODES The real meat of the site comes in the form of this page, which features links to each episode in the series, and also includes a comprehensive of every episode.

THE PRODUCTION CREW Finally, we have a section detailing some of the people most prominently involved in the production of the series.

Once again, we hope you enjoy your visit to this site, and we look forward to you visiting again in the future.

JUST ONE FINAL, REALLY IMPORTANT WARNING! While SPCM is not written with any specific age group in mind, it most definitely ISN’T for kids! We’re talking stuff like

Dangerous or easily-imitable behaviour

References to alcohol, drugs, and the usage thereof

Strong language (and I don’t just mean Alasdair’s accent!)

Sex and nudity, and references to them (I stop short of actually showing anything, but it does get rather close at times)

Gratuitous and graphic violence (again, nothing too extreme, but still pretty bad in places)

Generally, some pretty horrific shit

Oh, and the Midori Empire are pretty much Space Nazis, so if that sort of thing puts a knot in your stomach, there’s your warning

Just to be clear, the exact NSFW-factor tends to vary from episode to episode, and while it does frequently push the boundaries of good taste and suitability, I’ve always made the point of never making it any more adult than I would feel comfortable writing. That being said, if anyone else feels offended by anything I’ve written, you have every right to be - this warning is just for you to know what you’re letting yourself in for.

Also, if you’re a child and you’re just coming across this, maybe wait a few years before you check it out? And if you’re a parent, and you discover your child reading this, FLING YOURSELF AT THEIR DEVICE AND TURN IT OFF AS QUICKLY AS YOU CAN! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

Right, with that warning out of the way, please feel free to explore the rest of the site, and enjoy this crazy world that we’ve been building up all these years.

- Craig Black, co-creator of Space Pirate Captain MacTaggart

[captainmactaggart]

Geddes Line Profiles (Series 2)

What with yesterday having seen the publication of the final episode of Geddes Line, I thought it’d be nice to showcase all the profiles I did for all the characters who made their debut in this series. This post covers all the characters officially introduced in the second half of the series.

KAREN BAUER - General manager of Wall2Wall Security Solutions. Very pleasant, amiable, and a bit of a nerd. German Shepherd. (Episode 15)

HAROLD MEAD - Known professionally as just Harry. Burglar. The brains (relatively speaking) of a two-man operation. Weasel. (Episode 15)

FREDRICK MCGINNIS - Known professionally as just Fred. Burglar. The muscle in a two-man operation. Wolf. (Episode 15)

DYLAN RHYS - The father of Sam Rhys, and the current owner of Rhys Interstellar, a vast business conglomerate  spanning the Sol System, and surrounding districts. Welsh Foxhound. (Episode 17 - previously mentioned in Episode 12)

MYFANWY RHYS - Dylan's wife. Sam's mother. Something of a socialite in her own right. Arguably the true brains of Rhys Interstellar. Welsh Foxhound. (Episode 17 - previously mentioned in Episode 12)

METIN BALIK - Former street urchin turned revolutionary turned corporate hitman. Panther. (Episode 17)

TEMEL KIZARTMASI - Metin's right-hand man. Does all the heavy manual labour. Dog. (Episode 17)

CAPTAIN NATALIE COAL - Now-widowed wife-with-benefits of Captain Darkblade. A fairly notorious space pirate in her own right. Captain of the pirate cruiser Flare of the Phoenix. White Shepherd. (Episode 18)

LAWRENCE ASPINALL - Former regional secretary for Movados Interstela (one of the largest civilian transport unions in the Galaxy). A distant uncle of Damaris Moss. Red Fox. (Episode 19)

ADAM BRIDGER - Lawrence's opposite number down in the Core Systems. Very much still employed in his position. Border Collie. (Episode 19)

NORIKO MORI - Older sister of Kyoko Geddes (and therefore also Alasdair’s sister-in-law). Manga writer and artist. Raccoon. (Episode 20)

VALDIS WESTERWAL - Wife of Noriko Mori. Avant-garde artist. Just a bit strange in general, really. Silver Vixen. (Episode 20)

WS RHONA RANKIN - A police sergeant working in Kyle Abbin. Doesn’t tend to have much to do in this relatively crime-free town, but always on the alert, on the off chance that one should occur. Border Collie. (Episode 22)

FRANCO VALLONE - Proprietor of Franco's Traditional Fish Bar up at Tiree Outpost. Possible former mob boss as well. Weasel. (Episode 23)

ELETTRA VALLONE - Franco's wife. Just as bitter and ill-tempered as her husband. Weasel. (Episode 23)

ROSALVA VALLONE (alias ROSIE) - Daughter of Franco and Elettra. Much more open-minded and pleasant than the two of them put together. Weasel. (Episode 23)

GERRY CALDER - Proprietor of Calder's Takeaway, also up at Tiree Outpost. Much better at business than Franco, particularly when it comes to customer relations. Fox. (Episode 23)

JUDITH CALDER - Gerry's wife. Comes from a more new-age background. Doesn't approve of much of the food her husband sells, but still supports him anyway. Red Vixen. (Episode 23)

ELVIS CALDER - Son of Gerry and Judith, and potential heir to the fortunes of Calder's Takeaway. Not very good at standing up for himself - his only means of rebelling against his parents is secretly seeing Rosie Vallone on the side. Fox. (Episode 23)

NINA SPEKTOR - Wife of Vladimir. Mother of Veronika, and now grandmother of Natasha. Doesn’t overtly share any of her family’s criminal ties, but still a rather shady character in her own right. (Episode 24 - previously mentioned in Episode 55 of SPCM)

DR FRANCINE TIERNEY - The head doctor of the maternity ward onboard the hospital ship Loch Lomond. Probably the most qualified out of anyone in her ward. Border Collie. (Episode 25)

NURSE ROSALIE MCCABE - One of the nurses under Dr Tierney's command. Slightly more interested in the equipment than in her patients. Scottish Wildcat. (Episode 25)

NURSE SUSIE CAMPBELL - Another of Dr Tierney's nurses. Tends to pay more attention to the patients than Nurse Rosalie does. Rabbit. (Episode 26)

DR ROBERTSON - Another doctor onboard the Loch Lomond, though which field of healthcare he works in is uncertain. Doesn’t actually appear in the series - his part in Episode 26 was cut after the profile was done, and replaced with one final appearance by the author’s squirrel alter-ego. Raccoon.

[captainmactaggart]

Geddes Line Profiles (Series 1)

What with yesterday having seen the publication of the final episode of Geddes Line, I thought it’d be nice to showcase all the profiles I did for all the characters who made their debut in this series. This post covers all the characters officially introduced in the first half of the series.

MAISY URQUHART - Proprietor of the Station Hotel, Kyle Abbin, Jura. Unknowingly set off the whole rotten saga of Geddes Line. Silver Wolf. (Episode 1)

LYALL URQUHART - Maisy's daughter. Known as Lanky by her friends, due to her rather scrawny build. One of Moonzie's friends. Silver Wolf. (Episode 1 - previously mentioned in SPCM)

AMANDA PELUSA - Resident of Kyle Abbin, and frequent odd-jobs woman around that town. Avid enthusiast of vintage motorbikes - later becomes a courier for A&K Geddes Freight. Cat. (Episode 2 - previously mentioned in SPCM)

JESSIE-PEARL MONTGOMERY - Owner and head waitress of Jessie-Pearl's, a traditional American-style diner located within the Alameda Enterprise space station. Foxhound. (Episode 3)

NAOMI ZIMMERMAN - Computer technician turned stellar mechanic. Frequently does both for A&K Geddes Freight. All-round computer nerd. Raccoon. (Episode 4)

EVERETT STRICKLAND - Freighter pilot. Probably the oldest and wisest out of anyone working for the company, and frequently a voice of reason whenever Alasdair and Kyoko aren't around. Alsatian. (Episode 4)

MARCIA CARLIN - Head of catering at the company's Armadhu premises. Rules the canteen with an iron fist, and tends to have a good ear for gossip. Beagle. (Episode 4)

STEFFAN POWELL - Former customs officer. Now a cargo officer, and frequently called to provide security for more valuable or dangerous consignments. Beige Fox. (Episode 4)

PATRICIA RODRIGUEZ - Freighter pilot. Valuable and dangerous consignments are her specialty, and thus she frequently travels alongside Steffan Powell (see above). Sand Fox. (Episode 4)

EARL HAWKINS - Stellar mechanic. Prefers to keep mostly to himself, and tends not to get actively involved in the antics of his peers. Scotch Collie. (Episode 4)

DAMARIS MOSS - Freighter pilot. A lady of no fixed abode. Very sweet, bubbly and kindhearted, but a bit dense when it comes to anything outside of her work. Red Vixen. (Episode 4)

MAZEL EL-SHAKIR (alias MONIQUE MATHIS) - Cargo officer, and Damaris Moss' constant travelling companion. A lot more sensible and mature than her vixen friend, and always on hand to fill the gaps in her knowledge - of which there are quite a few. Bombay Cat. (Episode 4)

HILARY BYRD - Personal secretary for both Alasdair and Kyoko. Can best be described as dubious, but honest. He claims that his father was the infamous gangster Dickie Byrd - who's so infamous that nobody's actually heard of him. Weasel (despite his name). (Episode 4)

EMILY BALDWIN, 23RD DUCHESS OF ABBOT BALDWIN - Exactly what her name and title say: she's the wife of Simon Baldwin (18th Duke of Abbot Baldwin), and now the mother of Arthur (19th Duke of Abbot Baldwin). A good friend of Alasdair and Kyoko. Red Vixen. (Episode 5)

JAKOBVO - A large, black, dog-like thing, who's one of the natives of Santa Granada. An aide to Lord Diablo, he initially comes across as mere dumb muscle, but he's actually more sensible and intelligent than he looks. Dog, allegedly... (Episode 7)

RORY BAXTER - Former general manager of Scorpion Products Ltd, a pharmaceuticals manufacturer operating out of the Shaula System. He was the very first client of the newly-formed A&K Geddes Freight, when he called on their services to shift all the bankrupt stock on his premises. Golden Retriever. (Episode 8)

NORMAN GUTHRIE (alias LITTLE NORM) - Childhood friend of Joanna Mandarin, hotelier, gangster, and failed revolutionary. All in fairly rapid succession. Cat. (Episode 9 - previously mentioned in SPCM)

JEAN ELLERTON - Known as Jinty to her friends. Daughter of Gordon Ellerton (stationmaster at Kyle Abbin railway station), and no doubt destined to inherit his position when she grows up. Cat. (Episode 10 - previously mentioned in SPCM)

INNIS FASTNET - Known as Revvy to her friends, for reasons unknown. The eldest daughter of one of the local fishermen in Kyle Abbin. Has gained a lot of technical expertise as a result. Alsatian. (Episode 10 - previously mentioned in SPCM)

FLISK - A local gypsy boy who hangs around Kyle Abbin a lot of the time. Is from the same band of travellers as Moonzie - in fact, he's her boyfriend. Cat. (Episode 10)

MOONZIE GROSVENOR - . Black Vixen. A close friend and neighbour of Alasdair and Kyoko Geddes in Kyle Abbin. The semi-legitimate product of a doomed romance between the space pirate Grosvenor and the gypsy trader Kizzy. (First seen as a child in Episode 44 of SPCM - hits puberty over the course of GL)

ESTELLE BIRKENSTOCK - Nomadic trader turned space trucker, via some rather more shady and unsavoury business. Has grabbed the short end of enough sticks throughout her life to build an entire short end of a house. Red Vixen. (Episode 11)

JUSTIN PENWITH - One of the security officers working in Docking Bay 78, Unit 4, at the Salem Transport Nexus. Slightly too feeble-minded to be working in such a risky profession, but he rarely has to deal with anyone particular dangerous. Old English Sheepdog. (Episode 11 - not named)

GRANVILLE SUTHERLAND - Pilots a garbage freighter around the sectors surrounding the Salem Transport Nexus, and is extremely touchy about people commenting on his job, his ship or himself. A huge black slab of meat disguised as a Doberman. (Episode 11 - not named)

[captainmactaggart]

Battered, Weary - but Unbeaten

Well, folks, it had to come sooner or later. Not only is this the last episode of the season, but it's also the final episode of Geddes Line. This is the second half of The Mad Birth, and as always you can find it on either deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL26-The-Mad-Birth-PT3-841803118

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL26-The-Mad-Birth-PT4-841803222

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/13/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy one last time with the usual level of discretion. Of course, we may make another return to this crazy world, but for now, the story is well and truly over. Thank you for your support, and goodbye...

[captainmactaggart]

You’re gonna carry that weight...

Well, another week's gone by, and that can only mean another new episode. What's more, this one's the penultimate episode of the whole series - so naturally, it's a two-parter. You can find the first half of The Mad Birth either on deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL25-The-Mad-Birth-PT1-841796091

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL25-The-Mad-Birth-PT2-841796175

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/12/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy with the usual level of discretion, and stay tuned for the series finale next week...!

[captainmactaggart]

Evil Moms have Evil Babies

I don't really have a lot to say about this week's episode. It reintroduces a villain from about three years ago, and it also sees the fruition of an idea I had around that time as well. The episode's called Masked Bandit, and as usual can be found on either deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL24-Masked-Bandit-PT1-841793589

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL24-Masked-Bandit-PT2-841793739

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/11/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy as always, with the usual level of discretion.

[captainmactaggart]

There’s A Guy Works Up The Chip Shop Swears He’s Elvis

I won't pretend for a moment to be any great writing expert, but if I was to give any advice, it would be this: Don't write things when you're hungry. Clearly I failed to heed my own advice with this week's episode, Fishy Business, which can be found on either deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL23-Fishy-Business-PT1-841781646

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL23-Fishy-Business-PT2-841781777

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/10/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy as always, with the usual level of discretion.

[captainmactaggart]

(Yeah, we’re just waiting for the) Hammer To Fall

This week's episode took me just two days to write, and to this day I'm still not sure how I managed that. It's called Corporate Insecurity, and as usual, you can find it on either deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL22-Corporate-Insecurity-PT1-841779490

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL22-Corporate-Insecurity-PT2-841779523

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/9/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy as always, with more than the usual level of discretion - nothing explicit, of course, but it does come perilously close in places. In fact, here's a red triangle to be going on with.

[captainmactaggart]

A Christmassy Geddes (in May)

Right, does anyone remember that episode of Father Ted where they found themselves lost in Ireland's biggest lingerie department? Yeah, thought not, but this is basically the same idea. Except slightly different, and not co-written by a transphobic cuntbucket. It's called Retail Therapy, and as always, you can find it on either deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL21-Retail-Therapy-PT1-841777701

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL21-Retail-Therapy-PT2-841777753

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/8/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy with the usual level of discretion.

[captainmactaggart]

This Could Be Rotterdam (or anywhere...)

Fun fact about this week's episode: I had nineteen episodes of Geddes Line fully in the can by the time the first one premiered back last September, and I was working on this one on that particular date. It's called The Galaxy's Wife, and as usual, you can find it either on deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL20-The-Galaxy-s-Wife-PT1-841873202

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL20-The-Galaxy-s-Wife-PT2-841873238

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/7/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy as always, with the usual level of discretion.

[captainmactaggart]

Strike while the iron’s hot...

I'll be honest, I struggled for ages on what to call this week's episode, focusing as it does on industrial action. Then, quite by chance, I came across the term Wildcat Strike, and not only did it describe exactly what happens in the episode, but it also tied in neatly with the characters being animals (well, sort of - the striking character is a fox, not a wildcat). Anyway, as usual, you can find it on either deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL19-Wildcat-Strike-PT1-840876614

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL19-Wildcat-Strike-PT2-840876645

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/6/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy, with discretion as always.

[captainmactaggart]

Unforgettable...(who is she?)

This week's new episode of Geddes Line sees us returning to the world of piracy, as Alasdair and Kyoko come face-to-face with an old flame of an old enemy. And considering the episode's titled Madame Darkblade, I don't think it should be too hard to work out how this pans out. As always, you can find it on either deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL18-Madame-Darkblade-PT1-839994358

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL18-Madame-Darkblade-PT2-839994661

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/5/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy with discretion as usual.

[captainmactaggart]

Will The Real Pink Diamond Please Stand Up?

Because my time and space management skills leave a lot to be desired, many of my stories can best be described as a whole load of nothing, with a climax hastily tacked on near the end. This is one of those stories. It's called Business Trip, and as usual, you can read it on either deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL17-Business-Trip-PT1-839056765

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL17-Business-Trip-PT2-839056833

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/4/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy as always, with the usual level of discretion.

[captainmactaggart]

Something Beginning With ‘BS‘...

If you find yourself becoming bored during self-isolation, why not dig for treasure in your own back garden? I can think of plenty of good reasons why not, and most of them are covered in this week's episode, Buried Silver. As always, it can be found on either deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL16-Buried-Silver-PT1-838100011

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL16-Buried-Silver-PT2-838100073

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/3/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy with discretion as usual.

[captainmactaggart]

The Punk & The Godfather

Season 2, Week 2, Episode 2! Now, does anyone remember a one-time interloper into the world of SPCM, by the name of Tadashi Kusakabe? Yeah, thought not, but he returns in this week's episode - hence its title, Tadashi Returns. As usual, you can find it either on deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL15-Tadashi-Returns-PT1-837161012

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL15-Tadashi-Returns-PT2-837161046

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/2/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy as always, with the usual level of discretion.

[captainmactaggart]

Have We Got News For You...

Yes, folks, as previously threatened, and in spite of all the shit that's been going on recently, Geddes Line is BACK! Like with the first season, I thought I'd start us off with something simple to ease us back into this crazy world. This premiere episode is called Mutually Assured Conception, and as always can be found on either deviantART or FictionPress:

PART 1: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL14-Mutually-Assured-Conception-PT1-836167973

PART 2: https://www.deviantart.com/toastedalmond98/art/GL14-Mutually-Assured-Conception-PT2-836168042

FICTIONPRESS: https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3345473/1/Geddes-Line-Season-2

Read and enjoy with discretion as normal, and it's great to be back...