cigarettedaisychains

[cigarettedaisychains]

OOC: stressin'

I've had a big day week preparing for my besties wedding and making sure my work is up to date before taking leave. Gonna do my best to get back into the swing of it once the stress dies down. Sorry for being so MIA :<

[cigarettedaisychains]

sugushoko rkgk or sumn hehe

[cigarettedaisychains]

“why do you have that look on your face?” @lustraveil

Shoko was in a teasing kind of mood, and since they were with their friends and weren't 'dating' in their eyes, this meant she could have as much fun as she wanted. Especially if it meant it'd stir them both up for later.

It'd been a casual day out, followed by a dinner with some drinks, and now they were at a karaoke bar. A few more friends had joined them by the time they got there, and the room was filled to the brim with life - almost as though the world they lived in ceased to exist inside their technicoloured room.

The brunette'd been stealing glances at Suguru all night, and, if they were ever close enough, they'd share fleeting, longing caresses out of people's vision. After a few rowdy ballads, Shoko'd ended up on the couch by herself as Suguru and Satoru sang together - well, if what was coming out of their mouths could be really called singing.

Despite the show Satoru was putting on, Shoko's heavily lidded gaze never strayed too far from her beau. She was taken by the way he moved; the way his adam's apple worked with every belted out word; and the way escapee pieces of hair stuck to his forehead from the slight sheen of sweat that'd beaded across his forehead as he fought to match Satoru's energy.

It was fucking hot, to say the least. And Shoko was starting to fidget from how much it turned her on.

The only time her gaze drops from her man as their new drinks arrived, and once she's plucked it from the table with a courteous bow to the waiter, she glances back to Suguru with a devillish sparkle in her gaze. The moment the raven catches her eyes, Shoko adjusts herself in her seat with a deliberately coquettish uncross and cross of her legs.

A brow rises and, for just a moment, she thinks she hears his voice waver. She laughs to herself and brings the drink to her lips, however rather than taking a sip, she licks around the rim of her glass - gaze never breaking from Suguru's - until she's gathered enough of the salt from it's rim to make her drink tolerable to which she switches to the straw.

Although he currently can't hear her over Satoru's solo, Shoko raises her eyebrow towards him with a questioning: "Hmmm~?" The sound's 'innocent', yet the follow up swirl of her tongue around her straw is anything but. Finally, once she spies the bob of Suguru's throat as he tries to collect himself to join back in the singing, Shoko winks and pivots in her chair - directing her attention down to the phone she draws from her handbag. Soon enough, the song is over, and she doesn't even have to look up to know Suguru's beside her for the warmth of his thigh touching her hip is enough. "All I gotta say is, I'm glad I'm seeing this for free~" she coos, locking her phone as she flickers her attention back to Suguru with a coy expression.

With a 'confused' tilt of her head, Shoko feigns innocence and leans down to collect her straw again. "You look a little flustered, babe - did Satoru wear you out~?" Shoko drawls around the thin object between her lips, a knowing, playful grin dancing across her lips.

[cigarettedaisychains]

[guides shoko into his lap] ;) - sugu

She hadn't meant to become so enamored in the spitting garlic of the pot, but her lazy, sleep thick mind was easily impressionable in the mornings - especially when it came to the delicious aroma of breakfast.

Shoko had been pushing the ingredients around absently when Suguru's hands slid around her middle - the warm, sudden touch making her suck in a surprised breath as she plummeted back to earth. She walks back with the bodiless arms and when she feels them stop, she chuckles and twists her upper body towards him - fingers carding immediately through his hair.

"Good morning to you too, handsome," she drawls, voice still thick with slumber. "I didn't wake you up, did I?"

// @lustraveil

[cigarettedaisychains]

" I'm not going anywhere. " 一 to Jinx from Ekko @legendswithin

Jinx's initial response is to flinch upon hearing those words - flashes of blurry faces and crossed out eyes of those betrayers those she'd loved dancing before her minds eye. It'd been so long since someone had said words with such an incredulous depth to them that Jinx almost thought she'd imagined it, but as her startled, doe-eyed gaze pivoted to Ekko beside her, she saw no signs of pity, malice, or lies behind those eyes.

It made sense after the night they'd had dancing, boozing, and laughing like they had when they were kids. Amidst the music, their grievances were all but forgotten, and now that they'd taken some respite out on the roof, just the two of them, Jinx's usually noisy world had finally gone quiet for what felt like the first time in her life. Nothing and no one else existed but them and the stars above - curiously crystal clear despite the pollution from the Undercity.

Despite the peace she felt as she leaned into Ekko's arm, Jinx could feel the claws of uncertainty beginning to scratch at the base of her skull. At first, her unease was easily hidable until it bled into a tap of her finger, then shifted to a feverish bounce of her foot as it rested 'pon the other ankle that was crossed in front of her. As the seconds turned to minutes of silence, Ekko's words hanging between them, the blunette finally broke the silence with a small snort.

"That's what they've all said," Jinx murmurs under her breath, gaze drifting to where their thighs touched in such a simple, yet intimate way. Loss after loss had rendered those words and their meaning hollow, but something about the way Ekko had said them with such earnest made something within her flicker - as though the final dying embers of her heart had produced the tiniest of flames. Biting into her lower lip, Jinx let's out a puff of breath that makes her cheeks expand as an idea strikes her.

"Show me--" As quick as the words leave her, Jinx spins on the spot to face him - hands moving to rest on the space between them as she leans closer. "-- Prove to me in some other way that you're not gonna go anywhere," Jinx reiterates, brows furrowing with a mixture of determination and sadness. "Because I've had so many people promise me they're not going only to have them leave. I can't - I don't think -" she fumbles over her words, tongue feeling heavy, until she finally shakes her racing, manic thoughts back into submission.

With a tiny, desperate voice, Jinx quietly admits. "I don't know If I can go through that again, Ekko..." she pouts, looking back up through her lashes at him.

[cigarettedaisychains]

Shoko'd dreamt of this moment countless times since Geto's disappearance, yet every time had a different outcome both good and bad. Despite all of the scenarios she'd spent dreaming about, nothing could've prepared her for the moment she actually got to face Suguru - especially not tonight, not when she was still in her lab coat with the smell of formaldehyde still stuck to her skin.

Just like before, Suguru steals her breath away with just a look and makes her forget the world exists. It's only as he lifts his hand in some form of recognition does she finally move - the burn of her too small cigarette ignored as she drops it to the ground and snuffs it out. Shoko stumbles over her own feet in her haste to get to him because she can't go through this again. She can't lose him.

As soon as she's close enough, she reaches out to grasp Suguru's sleeve - knuckles immediately turning white from how firm her grip was as she pours her heart out, expressing words she'd never thought she'd get the chance to. When she's met with silence and only the slight shift in his features, Shoko's face flushes with shame - shame that she'd not said it sooner; shame that she'd never had the balls to do it when they were still back in school sharing too long looks and too long touches.

His question has her eyes widening with confusion, but the longer she looks, the more she starts to notice the unspoken quarrels he faced. He looked tired - much like he had before he'd left; when neither her, nor Satoru, had understood how extreme his turmoil was, regardless of how much she'd thought she had. Shoko's hold tightens even more, the movement making it appear as though she were tugging on his arm, and as he questions her reasoning behind professing her love for him, she sucks in a sharp breath.

"Because it's the truth," she starts, frowning. "And I curse myself daily for not telling you when I had the chance," Shoko can feel herself starting to tremble - adrenaline starting to course through her veins as she fought to hold onto him as long as possible; fought to tell him everything she'd ever thought and felt. Because she was tired, too, and call her selfish, but maybe, just maybe, getting the chance to spill her heart to him - regardless of whether or not he accepted - would help her start to sleep at night.

Shoko steps closer now until she's forced to tip her head to look up at Suguru, expression growing firm and determined. "I've been coming here a bunch in hopes of seeing you, and despite all of no-show's, I still held onto my hope that something - anything - would help us cross paths.... and now here you are," the brunette licks her lips, mouth feeling dry and tongue feeling heavy.

"Call me stupid - call me cliche, or sappy - I don't give a fuck, because I can't stand the idea of losing you again without expressing how I felt--" she swallows. "I know that a lot of time's passed and I know that things've changed but I just..." Shoko's grip on his sleeve loosens, not wanting him to feel as though she were forcing him to stay like everyone else had, and not long after her hand falls back to her side and her gaze falls to the floor, her previous gusto seeping into the ground between them.

"I just... wanted you to know that... and that I don't hate you - I never had, never will, and never could." Shoko steps back after her last declaration and crosses her arms over her chest, automatically finding herself self-soothingly rubbing at her goosebump covered biceps. Although she'd come into this expecting and preparing herself for Suguru to ignore her and leave, but she still couldn't stop the hope that weakly pulsed within her that maybe he'd stick around.

Even if it was only for a little while.

// @lustraveil

I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you. @cigarettedaisychains // suguru & shoko

The streets are throbbing with life, night life full of people brushing past each other. but to Suguru? It's a dull hum, a blur. It'd been a year since he'd walked away from that world, since he'd talked to anyone. Them. Her. Moving through the crowds like a shadow, within the shadows, untethered and detached from the world around him.

and yet, he'd felt it. the familiar presence, not cursed energy eiter, it's a heavier presence of those eyes weighing on him. that gaze. he turns, and across the stream of strangers, there she stood. A cigarette burning low between two fingers, and she doesn't even seem to flinch. Just watches him. He stares back at her, unmoving as the city and the walking life mutes around them, sound and motion fading. A beat passes. Then another. Finally, he raises his hand, it's barely a wave, not really, it's more a flick of recognition, half-hearted, uncertain. and then she steps forward, the cigarette drops to the pavement, crushed beneath her shoe as she closes the distance between them, their eyes unwavering. and she says the words 'i love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you.'

a beat passes, and his brows twitch as if trying to interpret her words, looking at her, not angry, nor touched even, more .. exhausted, confused. "...why would you say that?" his voice low, "Or, why come looking for me?" it's not asked gently.

// @cigarettedaisychains

[cigarettedaisychains]

keep reading, don't let me distract you. tobio & miwa! @st4rsinclined

Miwa could, in fact, not be distracted by the bouncing of the volleyball up against the wall. Not even as she slipped her airpods into her ears and curled herself up on the sofa, the rhythmic smack, thump of Tobio's practice still reverberated through her bones.

After the fourth flinch after having thought he was done with the wall hits, the raven sighs exasperatedly and sets her book aside. It was looking as though Miwa wasn't going to win the silence battle until Tobio'd run himself into the ground, so once she's rubbed her face to wake herself up, Miwa jumped up from her sofa to head to the back door. Without even the slightest hint to let Tobio know she was appearing, Miwa slung - a bit too aggressively, really - the door open to reveal herself to her suddenly bewildered brother, laughing as the ball dropped and hit him on the head from her sudden appearance stealing his attention.

"Y'know what - reading can wait," she announces, stepping down the few steps that separated the house from the grass of their backyard. Miwa wasn't about to tell Tobio that it was the ball hitting the house that'd ruined her groove, of course, because she knew that even if it hadn't been that - she'd still have come out to offer him a practice partner.

Whilst her skills weren't as obscenely amazing as her brother's,"I know I'm not your team, but I've watched you and the others long enough to know how to receive and toss to you - so let's practice together, yeah?"

[cigarettedaisychains]

𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐑 𝐄𝐓 𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐔𝐌

A collection of prompts centered around love & desire, taken from various sources. Adjust gender / pronouns / wording / etc. as needed. Some prompts are highly suggestive in nature. Engage appropriately.

─── 𝐬𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐞

❝ It’s nothing, I just . . . I’m glad you’re here. ❞

❝ Could you stay with me? Just for a little while longer? ❞

❝ If you remember me, then I don't care if everyone else forgets. ❞

❝ I can feel your heart beating in your chest. ❞

❝ Just a kiss. That’s all I ask. ❞

❝ I will always be yours. ❞

❝ You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I've ever had, ❞

❝ You make me feel safe. ❞

❝ You’ll always have a place here. ❞

❝ I’ve never felt like this before. ❞

❝ I’m afraid of what I feel. But . . . I think just that means it’s something worth feeling. ❞

❝ I have loved you from the moment I first heard my name fall from your lips. ❞

❝ Go back to sleep. I promise I will still be here when you wake. ❞

❝ Nothing and no one can hurt you. Not while I’m here. ❞

❝ I don’t want you in my life. You are my life. ❞

❝ I don’t want to sleep. I don’t want to waste another moment I could spend with you. ❞

❝ I want you, just as you are. ❞

❝ You love me. Real, or not real? ❞

❝ I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you. ❞

❝ You are, and always have been, my dream. ❞

─── 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠

❝ I’ve always wanted you. Only you. ❞

❝ Can’t you see what you do to me? ❞

❝ Don’t you understand? I would do anything for you. ❞

❝ You are my undoing. I cannot tell if you will be my ruin or my salvation, and I’m no longer sure if I care which it will be. ❞

❝ When I look at you, I see something divine. Something holy. ❞

❝ It’s you I want to worship. I will make supplication to your lips and offer my prayers at the altar between your knees. ❞

❝ I was a monster and you made me a man. ❞

❝ For your sake, I am debased. For you alone, I am weak. ❞

❝ I would lay the whole earth at your feet if you asked it of me. The sun, the moon, and all the stars, I would make them yours. ❞

❝ What I feel for you is not gentle, nor meek. It is not beautiful. It wretched, it is dark and depraved with desire. And it is consuming me whole. ❞

❝ Break my heart if you wish, but the pieces will still be yours. ❞

❝ Tell me you do not feel it, and I will name you a liar. ❞

❝ You are far too good for unworthy hands like mine ❞

❝ To burn with desire and keep quiet about it is the greatest punishment we can bring on ourselves. ❞

❝ I fear if I let you touch me, I will fall apart. ❞

❝ There are certain things we must not want, yet I find myself wanting them nonetheless. ❞

❝ I need you. I need to have you. I need to make you mine. ❞

❝ You ruined me in my heart long before you ever touched my skin. ❞

❝ Must I beg? Must I fall to my knees and plead for the mercy of your touch? ❞

❝ I want it to be my name that you call in the dead of night, my name that rests upon your tongue when your body shivers. Mine alone. ❞

─── 𝐣𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐲

❝ I think you still love me, but we can’t escape the fact that I’m not enough for you. ❞

❝ You deserve better than that. ❞

❝ I lie awake at night in restless agony, wishing you were there beside me. ❞

❝ Do you not know how you haunt me? ❞

❝ In my dreams, I am yours. ❞

❝ I am to wed someone else. ❞

❝ Does he make you feel like this? ❞

❝ We both know who you’re truly thinking of when you’re with him. ❞

❝ You taste sweeter than she ever could. ❞

❝ She’s not the one I want. ❞

❝ Just because I know I can’t have you, it doesn't change what I feel for you. ❞

❝ He’s not good for you. ❞

❝ Every time I see you with him it kills me a little more inside. ❞

❝ Let me go. The more we hold on to this, the more it will hurt us both. ❞

❝ This is not allowed of us. We mustn’t – ❞

❝ Put aside your pride and admit that you want me. ❞

❝ Will I only ever be worthy of stolen moments in the shadows? ❞

❝ If he puts his hands on you again, I’ll cut them off. ❞

❝ When I’m with her, I pretend that it’s you. ❞

❝ Does he know? ❞

─── 𝐚𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐬

❝ Say you love me, and I know it will all be okay. ❞

❝ Do you know how long I have waited for this? For the day I could hold you in my arms and call you mine? ❞

❝ I fought for this. For you. ❞

❝ I never stopped loving you. I was only afraid of what you were becoming. ❞

❝ Come back. Even as a shadow. Even as a dream. ❞

❝ To feel anything deranges you. To be seen feeling anything strips you naked. ❞

❝ When I desire you a part of me is gone. ❞

❝ Desire doubled is love, and love doubled is madness. ❞

❝ I suppose you do love me, in your way. ❞

❝ Love does not make me gentle or kind. ❞

❝ I desire the things which will destroy me in the end. ❞

❝ There is a gentle thought that often springs to life in me, because it speaks of you. ❞

❝ The gods have fashioned us for love. That is our great glory, and our great tragedy. ❞

❝ I should not have waited so long. I should have kissed you every night and every day. You were made to be kissed, often and well. ❞

❝ I crossed a thousand leagues to come to you. Don’t tell me to leave. ❞

❝ Love is poison. A sweet poison, yes, but it will kill you all the same. ❞

❝ You're mine. Mine, as I'm yours. And if we die, we die. All men must die. But first, we'll live. ❞

❝ My sword is yours. My life is yours. My heart is yours. ❞

❝ We all dream of things we cannot have. ❞

❝ Be with me always - take any form - drive me mad! Only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! ❞

[cigarettedaisychains]

w.i.p tentative muse list here

ARCANE: jinx* CHAINSAW MAN: angel devil, power*, denji* HAIKYUU: kenma, bokuto, kiyoko, alisa haiba, kuroo JUJUTSU KAISEN: shoko ieiri, aoi todo*, nobara kugisaki*,

[*] = trialing

[cigarettedaisychains]

As Suguru beckons her closer, Shoko's feet are moving before she even realises, and within two strides, she's sinking into his chest - inhaling his scent deeply into her lungs. The brunette closes her eyes as she feels his warm breath against her hair - the vibrations of his voice making goosebumps pebble across her flesh.

Oh how long had it been since she'd been held like this? How long had it been since she'd felt so held together - so safe?

His words then hit her like a train, but rather than pain coursing throughout her body, she feels tingles exploding like fireworks beneath her skin. Her taut muscles melt into his embrace as she holds him back - fingers sinking into his soft robes and shoulders. It didn't even matter how fleeting it was, because as he let her go and started to lead her somewhere, it was enough to reignite the yearning within.

Like a lost duckling, she follows wherever he steers her, and once they're in the safe confines of his room, Shoko steps in and takes the space in. It was so undeniably Suguru, and so similar, yet still so vastly different to how his dorm had looked during school. His presence engulfed her every sense and for a moment, Shoko simply closed her eyes to enjoy it before she turned back to him and walked over - not even bothering to say anything as she winds herself around his middle and tucks her face into his chest.

That's all she does for the longest time before she finds her voice again enough to say: "I'd love to stay." The words are muffled by his clothes, but she soon lifts her head to nuzzle herself up and under his jaw, eyes closed as though she were afraid to open them and suddenly wake up from yet another dream. But soon enough she does - albeit a little reluctantly - and when Shoko shifts her head back just enough to look back up at Suguru, she finds herself smiling with relief as she reaches up to cup his face, thumb brushing over his cheek.

"Gods… I didn't think you could get any taller or broader, but look at you," she comments, hand brushing back to gently rake through those long, silken strands. "… Look at your hair…" Shoko's admiration comes out in breathy voice before her hand settles on the nape of Suguru's neck so her nails can scratch softly. "I can't believe it's been four years," she whispers, head cocking slightly as she inspects his face as though she's trying to commit it to memory all over again.

With a slight furrow of her brow and a press of her lips, Shoko presses the pads of her fingertips firmly into the top of his spine. "I'm sorry for not finding you sooner, Ru…"

// @lustraveil

He stood there listening to her explanation, chills rising the hairs on the back of his neck as she admits to her feelings. He exhales, somewhat taken back. It's the fact she chooses to be honest with him, now, even after everything. She still felt that way. he starts to acknowledge that perhaps Manami’s intervening had served as a reminder of the time that stood between them. Suguru still remained put where he was when she turns around, he sees her, really sees her for the first time today - in a different light. Not just exhaustion in her face, but the way she looks at him. And he can’t deny, there’s concern for her, but also love that he still held for her. and despite it all, she still came. when she finally admits to it all, chalking it up to her foolishness, he doesn't respond with words. he doesn't need to. Instead, he motions closer, no longer hesitating, but still treading carefully. his eyes fixed on her, unwavering, softer. "Come here," his tone almost breathless, soft as his arms slide around her slowly. one at her waist, the other reting at the back of her head as he draws her in closer, aching for closeness. he exhales against her head, "I think.. it's hoenst," he finally says against her temple, his tone still quiet. Gentle. "Because I've missed you too." his fingers comb through her hair. he almost instinctively kisses her head, but he refrains, stopping himself, instead, just allowing himself to feel the her warmth in his arms. and finally after another moment, he slowly, reluctantly withdraws, just enough to look at her once again. "Come with me," reaching a hand around her shoulder as he guides her around towards another door. Doesn't say where they're headed, but leads her through quiet halls, away from open spaces, to thicker walls, towards the confines of privacy where eyes won't weigh heavy on them. His hands slowly dips down her back as they walk, eventually falling away. They reach a door, and he stops, turning to her. "You've been here all evening," his voice quiet but assured, "I couldn't send you off like this," Specifically worded without pressure, simply invitation. An offer as a request wrapped in sheer courtesy. With that, he opens the door to his personal quraters, holding it open as he extends an arm for her to step through first, watching her with that same softness in his gaze once more.

// @cigarettedaisychains

[cigarettedaisychains]

It was all Angel could've ever wanted, and yet the freedom to touch Aki as he pleased was something he still struggled with on the daily. He'd lived a lonely life, chained to a mad woman and desperate for a connection he couldn't have; not without fear of killing someone just for loving them.

The constant battle became even worse when Aki'd appeared in his life and, for the first time ever, stood by his side without a sliver of fear in that fascinating gaze. And when he'd touched him - gods - it'd damn near killed him to know he'd stolen some of his lovers life. Although it'd been Aki's choice to do what he had - to save him - Angel'd almost locked himself away from the rest of the world - from the raven - in shame of his power.

But when Aki'd had his humanity snatched away from him, the world turned on it's axis at a violent angle. Angel thought he'd lost him for good the first time he'd locked eyes with his love, yet deep down behind several bolted locks, Angel knew Aki was there - his Aki, not the Aki Makima had created and turned into the most dangerous devil known to man.

Day by day, Angel refused to leave his side unless he wished it, and day by day, he helped chip away at those locks until Aki came back to him.

They discovered that he could touch him not long into the process, yet despite it having been a few months, Angel still hesitated. But it was moments of peace like this when they were completely alone and at peace that Angel forgot those worries and found himself touching Aki without fear. It was moments like this where all he could think about was how much he craved this man like a drug.

His fingers dance along the expanse of his arm and his gaze follow their path; from his shoulder, down the dip of his elbow, all the way to the cuff on his wrist before dipping beneath the fabric to touch his cool skin. The question falls upon deaf ears before Angel snaps back into reality, red gaze flickering up to meet grey with an absent stare.

After a blink to restart his thoughts, Angel's gaze falls again to where he's now gripped Aki's wrist as softly as possible within his hand so his thumb can graze over his pulse. "It is," he answers finally, his words soft as though he's scared of ruining their peace. "If I'm being honest? I want to drown in the feel of your skin on mine," Angel admits bluntly, lips pressing into a gentle line as he feels his cheeks warm.

"And yet... I still find myself waiting for the moment something goes wrong," because everything did - everything always had. Angel swallows and squeezes Aki's wrist before letting go to reach up and tentatively brush his knuckles across the raven's cheek, eyes following his touch as though it were a poisonous animal waiting to strike.

"... Is it weird for you, Aki? It doesn't hurt, does it?"

@st4rsinclined

My muse runs their fingers along your muse’s wrist absentmindedly, tracing slow, lazy circles. ((akiangellll))

He's changed since the mantle of gun devil has fallen on his shoulders. Gun metal eyes are drawn to the motion, watching the way that fingers run along the cuff of his suit, absent minded drawings and doodles that have no rhyme or reason. He's mesmerized by it –– and the soothing sensation that curls around in his chest and stomach at the simplicity of it. Aki's come back wrong in so many ways, and yet that familiar part of him that is desperate for something more, desperate for affection, desperate for connection, constantly curls up to the surface when he is meant to be a heartless monster.

There is no solace in the death of who has done this to him, either. Makima is long since dead –– and in her wake, public safety is in shambles. It makes things a little easier, slipping in and out of their service, but the watch they keep on him is tight. He knows that even his apartment has eyes on it; he's too valuable to let loose, too destructive for his own good. The devil that once was has merged with his soul and laughs at the fact that he makes him breathe, but it doesn't matter. Aki has claimed it as his own.

"Is it weird for you? To be able to touch me now?" The question is out before he can think too hard about it, eyes slowly slipping upward to meet Angel's. He finds he's far too glad to see him alive, to see him thriving; someone who hadn't wanted the fate that he was given, but had accepted it all the same. Another one of Makima's victims.

He feels the obscene need to protect. Sometimes he wonders if that comes from who he was or is part of who he is now, a fiend that sees another fiend and gives into protection mode without much of a fight.

[cigarettedaisychains]

She'd never felt more on show than she did beneath Suguru's stare. It takes her back to times when his undivided attention was all she'd ever wanted, and all she'd ever dreamed of. With just a look, Shoko could come completely undone beneath that all-seeing gaze and, turns out, even after all these years, they still had the same effect of making her feel entirely naked and vulnerable before him, despite being fully clothed.

Shoko guesses he wouldn't be Suguru if he didn't turn the spotlight on her whip-lashing, unspoken emotions.

Shoko sets her jaw and lets her head droop forward, doing her best to compose the raging, sickly emotions that'd begun brewing in her mind, heart, and belly. "You're - you're the reason so much work comes through my door, yet you're the reason I can't sleep at night and leave my bed empty,, yet here I am, after four years, trying to blindly climb back into your bed without even thinking of the consequences - about whether or not there'd be someone else - or, fuck, if you were even interested in me anymore," Shoko explains, hating the way her word vomit felt strained because of the tightening of her chest.

"I'm not…" The same sprite, young woman anymore. The brunette cut herself off by biting her tongue and starts to comfortingly rub at her upper arms. Shoko was sure she smelt like an ashtray, despite how clean she kept herself because of her job; her hair was unkempt and starting to get greasy; her clothes were worn and so was she. She was tired - so, so tired. Shoko's fingers tremble and sink into her flesh through her coat. "I got so swept up in seeing, hearing, and smelling you - that I just… I forgot about the world and everything in it." Just like the days they were together - just like it always would be.

Shoko turns back around to face Suguru - to face the one who'd gotten away, despite how desperately she'd tried to cling to him. Although she wishes it to be stronger, the smile she offers him shows just how much life had been sapped from her bones, Yet, amidst it all, there's still a flicker of hope that maybe, just maybe she'd gotten the wrong idea about that beautiful woman who's traipsed in with all the confidence she'd once had. Why was it only now whilst being in front of Suguru that she was starting to notice how much she felt like an empty husk of her old self?

"… I got ahead of myself because…" Shoko whispers, pressing her lips into a sad, thin line. "Standing here with you like this is making me remember how much I miss your… stupid ass," she admits, biting out the last words not at him, but at herself for opening up old wounds and bleeding before him. "I guess that really makes me the stupid ass, huh?" She scoffs, arms rearranging to cross over her chest as she turns her face away again to try and hide the flaming blush on her cheeks.

// @lustraveil

Despite polite appearances, he’s well aware of Manami’s wary impression. Expects as much, as she’s part of the system he’s carefully building. From her point of view, Shoko isn’t simply just an outsider. Manami knows enough about her to have a cause for concern.

but, not to him. Suguru knows that to some degree, he might be compromising things, but, he trusts his intuition. Trusts her. Manami’s suspicion isn’t a cause for concern, he’d deal with the matter later. He knows that if he was standing here with anyone else, they would be kept at a careful distance. And yet here he is, giving her a side of him that he hasn’t given to anyone else in years. Not since the last time he saw her. Because she came, and because she’s still the same girl who sees past everything. Still the same Shoko.

as Manami heads back inside, he picks up on a shift between them. the way her fingers slightly tense, the subtle tilt of her head as she’s watching the other woman’s figure walk off. He watches her, as her words break the silence, as she falters. And suddenly seems to have a change of heart.

He doesn’t stop her. Not right away. Lets her have her space by not reaching out or attempting to go after her. Just lets her speak, watching her fumble. He can hear the doubt, and for a moment, it’s a blatant reminder of just how far apart they have actually grown. How long it had been.

As she turns on her heel, he finally cuts in, composed, and calm as he asks “What’s changed?” A simple question. He stands there, eyeing the back of her head. He isn’t asking her to stay, or pleading for her to reconsider. He won’t. Not because he didn’t want to, but because he can’t with her. He still cared for her, even after all this time. Truly caring for her meant he couldn’t be selfish. He can’t force her. It had to he of her own accord. So instead, he leaves the choice in her hands, as he always did.

If she walks, she walks. And he’d tell himself this was to be expected. But if she stayed… he wouldn’t pretend it wont mean something. And so, he waits patiently, his gaze is sharp, holding out for her decision. To see if she decides this is where she wants to be.

// @cigarettedaisychains

[cigarettedaisychains]

“do you ever feel… like… you know… things? like… those warm… feelings?”

The question comes out of seemingly nowhere, yet at the same time, the timing feels incredibly right. They were alone in Satoru's room and had been for a few hours now, yelling profanities at the screen before the winner of their Mortal Kombat fights started hooting and hollering their victory.

When the question'd been posed, they were amidst a 'snack and smoke' break that had Shoko propped up on his windowsill as Satoru lounged upside down on his bed - neck danging over the end of it in her direction. Shoko watches him curiously before she eventually answers through a soft snort.

"Nope - I haven't had 'warm and fuzzies' uploaded to my database yet," she responds, voice as monotone as it can get as her gaze swivels Satoru. Unfortunately, Shoko can only hold the seriousness for a few seconds before she's grinning wolfishly up at him and laughs, hand fluttering up to cover her mouth.

"Honestly though? I do feel those - and quite a bit," Shoko replies truthfully as she picks at the cuticles of her nails - a habit she'd developed when addressing such tender topics. "It all started when I met this pretty, tall idiot with a knack for getting himself into trouble, actually," her gaze flickers sidelong towards Satoru, wondering if he was understanding her roundabout confession.

"He let me in despite not having the same level of talents as he, and now I swear the cheeky fucker's found a way to brand his image into the back of my eyelids and onto brain because he haunts my every waking moment," Shoko sighs and pouts dramatically, feigning this to be a bothersome situation - always eager to tease Satoru or get a rise out of him.

But after letting her playful words settle for a moment, Shoko finds herself rubbing softly at her biceps as she braces herself for what she's about to admit. "But, despite all that... I like it." The brunette blushes, turning her face downwards just enough to create a curtain of hair between them. "Amidst the chaos he brings, I still feel safe and seen... There's also this childlike joy I'm finally being given the opportunity to enjoy when he's by my side," geez, she bets Satoru wasn't expecting this kind of response - why was she being so... so truthful all of a sudden.

With a soft breath to steel herself, she lifts her head back up and, as though she hadn't just poured a part of her heart out, she glances back at Satoru curiously.

"... What about you? Do you get warm feelings?"

[cigarettedaisychains]

❛ come here. there’s nothing to be afraid of. ❜ satoru & shoko

Shoko hadn't realised she'd been staring until Satoru's words snap her out of her trance, and as they did, she can only manage a few owlish blinks in his direction as though she'd encountered a ghost. With a quick shake of her head, her attention now snaps away from his face to take in the rest of his body once more, jaw falling open in horror.

She'd never, ever, seen him with this many injuries before. "What ha--" she stops herself because, in all honesty, did she really want to know what'd happened? Not that she imagined she had much choice with Satoru, she felt like he'd tell her regardless of if she asked or not.

After pulling her jaw up off the floor, Shoko frowns and gestures to the table closest to her with a huff. "I'm not scared, Satoru, fuck..." Shoko grumbles as she hooks slender fingers into the lip of her trolley as she pulls it over to him. When she's close enough, she toes the stool beside them closer and sits down - tapping his knee with her elbow as if to say 'spread 'em.'

Once his knees were parted, Shoko scoots between them so she can get closer. Usually, if the patient wasn't someone she was friendly with, she'd never get this close - but since it was Satoru and boundaries had been crossed years ago, she didn't bother with formalities. Plus, it was just them - not that she gave a shit should someone barge in.

She helps Satoru out of his shirt before she reaches for some gauze to start cleaning him up, brows pinching at the centre as she took in his wounds. Even though she hadn't been able to teach them how to heal, his ability to stay alive with such deep lacerations never failed to astound her. Not to mention how lucky he got with wounds constantly missing all vital organs.

"From what they described I thought..." You'd died. The admission feels heavy on her tongue, and for a brief moment her movements stilled until she found her rhythm again, lapsing into silence. Finally, Shoko speaks up - body straightening but gaze still remaining on the area she currently had her hand pressed against. "You've gotta stop being so reckless," she chastises quietly, pressing just a bit firmer with the gauze for emphasis.

As her lips press into a thin line, she feels her stomach flip with unease as her fingers curl into the gauze as she looks up to meet Satoru's gaze - those piercing blues she hopes would never lose their sparkle. "... Cause I swear, Gojo Satoru, if you turn up on my table, I'll - I'll --" Shoko's puffs out her cheeks. "I'll -- get you back up just to kill you myself." Despite it sounding like a threat, it was Shoko's way of expressing how much she cared for him. He was the strongest, yes, but at times, he could also be the most dangerously empty-headed person she's ever encountered.

With a few more absent dabs at his wound, Shoko's expression melts into something far softer - something akin to worry - and with a deep exhale through her nose, she lets her shoulders slouch forward in defeat. It was in this moment that, in a whisper, she admits to the quiet, small world between them:

"... I can't lose you, 'Toru..."

[cigarettedaisychains]

[cigarettedaisychains]

The tone of Suguru's voice licks up her spine, the shiver warm and familiar. The brunette huffs softly at him and glances at her cigarette. "Mmmm, I've been trying to quit and be more mindful of my smoking - Hime's on my ass about it," Shoko explains, rolling the smoke absently between her fingers. She'd been so good until now, but something about the comfort his presence brought her made Shoko forget about everything else.

If she was going to be bad by visiting him, then she might as well keep the ball rolling.

Shoko raises both eyebrows at the compliment before she scoffs and rolls them, lazily bringing her cigarette back to her lips to hide the smile on her face. "Mmmm, is that so?" she purrs, hating the way her ego was so easily stroked. "Aren't you lucky that this esteemed doctor plays by her own rules, then?" Shoko tsks softly, slowly exhaling milky smoke towards the cursed spirit so it was immediately sucked away.

She's not quite sure what it is about the short, clipped answers she's receiving to her questions, but it's starting to poke at her nerves more than she cared to admit. It was tough reminding herself that the man before her wasn't the same Suguru she'd grown up with. Just when she thought she had that picture of him solidly back in place, Suguru'd beat it back down with every quip, every small smile, and every intimate look he reserved just for her. So as he takes her hand within his and smiles at her in such a heart-stopping way, Shoko finds herself sucking in a little breath and holding it - watching, waiting.

Shoko gets as far as lacing her fingers between Suguru's and opening her mouth to respond when they're interrupted, the flash of pink out of the corner of her eye making her head turn quickly in the woman's direction. "I-- Oh." Manami pauses and eyes Shoko wearily before flicking her gaze to Suguru, a pretty, yet tight-lipped smile painting her features. "Nothing of importance that can't wait until the morning, Master Geto," the young woman bows her head and turns off her tablet with a click.

She wouldn't say anything about having heard their conversation about Miss Ieiri staying, so if asked, she'd make it sound as though the topic was for their ears only. "Well, I'll be on my way - sorry to have interrupted. Call me if you need anything." Manami turns to leave, but after taking a few steps, she stops and turns back around. "And thank you for healing Toshihisa, Ieiri-san," with the slightest of bows in Shoko's direction, Manami turned back around and walked - heels clicking softly on the ground.

Shoko stares after the pretty young woman, and once the assertive tap of her heels disappears wholly, she addresses Suguru again - fingers tightening around the raven's grasp. The confidence she'd felt minutes prior was all but gone with the click of those damn shoes. "I should…" she frowns. "Maybe I should… go - maybe this was a bad idea," Shoko's voice is barely above a whisper as she says this, however she doesn't make a move to pull her hand away until a few seconds later, should he release her. Why would Suguru want to spend time with her after all this time when he had someone as beautiful as his assistant around?

"I'll, um, wait outside for a cab - I'll come back tomorrow." Shoko bows her head and turns to in an attempt to leave, cheeks flustered from the shame of letting her intrusive thoughts get the better of her.

@lustraveil

He watches quietly as the realization dawns on her face. That's new for her. A split second flicker of guilt and reaction? She wasn't usually one to forget, nor show this strong a display of emotions. Still, it brings a small, amused smile to his lips.

He doesn't say anything, not at first, anyway. Just watches her as she coughs and turns away. Suguru keeps it short and sweet, like always, "That's new." his tone still quiet, but the smallest hint of warmth. When she starts to apologize, he shakes his head, watching as she trails off the moment she notices the spirit he'd summoned to quietly clear the air. Quite literally. All that said, something about her presence brings out the same fondness she used to bring out in him. Subtle, but very much present. and in existence.

She brings up the prospect of him having another 'healer'. To which, earns her a narrowing of his eyes, playful and calculated of course. "Haven't found one quite on par with the esteemed doctor gracing our presence today." he teases, knowing she'd catch on full well to the sarcasm. Even if it was true, of course. However, it's a method to deflect. Suguru knows what she's saying. The thought behind it. That she assumed she'd been replaced, but no one quite matched her. They both knew this.

Maybe that's why he asked. Maybe that's why she came.

A lot of maybes. So when she says, 'Maybe happier is a better word then?' His gaze lingers on her for a moment, shoulders lifting in a slow shrug, his eyes unwavering. "Maybe." he echoes. It's not dismissive, not vague, just… complicated. To say he was happy? That… was not a can of worms he's willing to open or examine.

Of course, when he thinks they'd reached the natural end of things, she finds a reason to stay. She seems to say it quickly, without any hesitation. Those are the small cues Suguru picks up on. He stares at her. Quiet. Still. Part of him knows there's genuine truth in that statement, but there's something else too. Something she wasn't saying.

His eyes narrow slightly, giving her a look that's too piercing, and knowing. The kind that made it seem like he's reading right into her soul. "Really now?" he murmurs, a slow smile tugging at the edges of his lips. He could see right through her, read her, not always, but in times like these, very much so. Something that he knew she personally appreciated. The way he saw her when everyone else only saw her as something of an aid. "I'd appreciate that." he adds, polite, yet unmistakably fond and a little smug, even.

Then, her fingers touch his robes, light, familiar, and in a way that's too hard to ignore. He glances down at the sight, smiling again, slower this time. Warmer, even. She knows exactly where she's brushing up against. Knows him in a way no one else here knows him. With that, Suguru's hand lifts, fingers brushing over hers before curling around them, his touch is subtle as he holds her gaze again. His eyes are saying more than his words, "I didn't think I warranted such top-tier bedside manner." they both know what she's asking. What he's saying.

and just before the tension between them can tip into something more, they're interrupted by none other than his figurehead second-in-command. manami. she steps out, pausing as she takes in the scene before her. He doesn't flinch, he's still holding her knuckles in his grip, standing far too close, his eyes far too soft. He watches as she glances between them with suspicion, but simply turns his head, composed as ever. "Report?" he asks calmly, as if nothing out of place is happening at all. But even so, his fingers still rest over Shoko's, even if only for a moment longer.

// @cigarettedaisychains

[cigarettedaisychains]

ooc:

i've gone back to work, so my brain's quite overloaded at the moment. i promise to get to asks and responses as soon as possible <3