clementine-thedestroyer

[clementine-thedestroyer]

Alien!Kyle who’s kind of confused by the concept of jewelry (the concept is simply not one that exists to his kind. Their culture is one that we would consider extremely utilitarian) but finds it hot as fuck none the less.

He’s borderline obsessed with decorating you with pretty things. In his mind, it makes you happy, and it’s a way he can adorn his partner with physical evidence of his ability to provide for them.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

Guys the leviathan anime sucks…. My favorite world war 1 historical fantasy has been bastardized… this voice acting is atrocious.

Genuinely. They’re like 15 why does it sound like they’re 12… they made Dylan weird.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

Poly 141 x reader AU where Price uses primal play as a training exercise… you get sent off into the woods with a 30 minute head start and the boys have till dawn to track you down.

(Really, you’ve just gotta hope it’s not Johnny who finds you first. The others will at least stretch you out properly before splitting you open on their cock)

[clementine-thedestroyer]

Okay- I really don’t simp for Graves at all but like… mountain lion!Graves?

The ears would match his hair perfectly!! And if you’re from anywhere that has mountain lions, you know how terrifying they can be.

If you’re unlucky enough to cross paths with one that decides to attack, you won’t see it till it’s on you. They blend into so well, it’s genuinely amazing. And I mean… you can’t tell me that’s not perfect for Graves.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

Guys look!! I’m pretty sure the first thing I ever posted here was a scaramouche x reader fanfiction. It’s crazy that I’ve been doing this for two years….

[clementine-thedestroyer]

This is so funny I’m dying.

Imagine he’s your uncle on your dad’s side, as in your father’s brother, so you even have the same name as him- which only ends up fueling the rumors.

Older!price and younger!reader who are pretty close or whatever, and its basically an open secret that ur sleeping together, okay?

And I mean, everyone knows. Its basically a given fact not to mess with u lest price get involved. No matter how attractive u are, the captain has a claim on you.

So when some rookie sees you and ghost standing chest to chest, having just kiss like you were trying to eat him in the tucked away alcove? Everyone knows. Well, mostly everyone. Knowledge of this little situation only reaches you once people start giving you dirty looks and whispering about loyalty like you wouldnt hear.

Its agony, bc all of the people you usually hang out with want nothing to do with you, and you cant figure it out. It gets to the point where ur running drills alongside price and people keep disobeying you or glaring that you finally snap. You grab one of the soldiers and pull her aside, demand to know whats going on.

"Youre not sly, yknow? Everyone knows about you and ghost." Is her response, which only makes you frown.

"Okay? And what of it? Hes a damn good man. If this is about his appearance or personality I swear-" you begin, ready to defend ghosts honor.

"No. Its because your cheating on captain price." The woman cuts you off, and just those few words has you jolting back like you've been slapped.

"EXCUSE ME??" Ur baffled and making a fucking scene, but who wouldnt in ur situation "you mean John price??? My uncle? That captian price??"

Turns out all those movie nights and lunches spent together culminated in literally the worst sentence anyone has ever said to you. Well. At least people learn to check their facts before starting rumors....

[clementine-thedestroyer]

My new head canon is that Simon is one of those people who’s just fucking addicted to Tony Chachere’s creole seasoning.

Without fail, he always either has a can of the stuff in his room or hidden in one of the cabinets of the common area. Even on missions, if he’s going to be eating MREs he’ll slip a little plastic baggie of the stuff into his pack.

After a while, Johnny eventually gets curious and asks to try some. Simon lets him, and not even a minute later Johnny’s shoveling food into his mouth and ranting on about how good it is and that he should’ve listened to Simon sooner.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

Going to be drinking alcohol for the first time tonight so if I post something weird I’m sorry.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

Guys, it’s going to be really hard for me to enjoy my military propaganda porn if my countries ACTUALLY FUCKING AT WAR.

Also I’m literally about to move across the country so if it seems like I’ve been a bit quiet, that’s why. Moving out is scary, and my OCD does not play nice with anything going on in the news these days.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

sorry for spammin you, im just getting into COD tbh and price is too damn yummy to resist, you write really really well and i love your ideas!!! hope you have a good day today my friend

Thank you so much!! I’m glad you like my writing, i don’t think Activision knew what they were releasing when they casted Barry Sloane as Price… I mean, even a broken clock is right twice a day.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

Mean dom!Price punishing you for letting yourself get sunburnt by flogging your burn…. And he’s so fucking mean about it too. He doesn’t care if you cry- just telling you that you know better than to not take care of what belongs to him.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

ik i just run a tumblr smut page BUT!!!

FUCK ICE, free palestine, free congo, FUCK trump, FUCK musk, no one is illegal on stolen land, and if u disagree, FUCK YOU TOO!!!

i’ve said this before but if u support that fuckass orange in office, idc if ur a silent follower or ur like is ur only form of interacting with me, just know, i don’t want it!!! and u are a terrible person!!! 😛

[clementine-thedestroyer]

You guys don’t understand how much I love Fallout New Vegas. I get the jitters every time I think about the game.

My hot take is that Price wouldn’t be a part of the NCR.

Like, yes. That is what WOULD make sense, but it feels like the obvious choice. I think it’s much more interesting to imagine him as a member of the Brotherhood of Steel or even Caesar’s Legion.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

I need you all to know that I actually HAVE been writing recently. I wrote like 5000 words for Aurora Borealis- only to figure out I’ll need to write like 5000 more before I can actually post anything because the last two chapters need rewritten…

It’s important to me that you guys know I’m trying. COD takes up like 99% of my thoughts in my down time, I just don’t have any down time and am struggling to write like I used to.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

When autoheart releases this new album they’ve been teasing I’m going to jizz my fucking pants

[clementine-thedestroyer]

I think that Simon entertains his kids by teaching them to pick locks or something.

Not just like traditional lock picking, but the other things you can do like using a bump key (I believe that’s what it’s called- not sure though) he does it partially because yeah, it’s just a fun thing to do.

But also because he never wants his children to trust a lock with their life. He wants them to understand exactly how easy it is to get past a shitty lock. And even more so, that locks are a deterant, at best, and won’t stop anyone who truly wants to get in.

[clementine-thedestroyer]

I’m in my flop era but that’s okay because it’s summer so I have a three month window to write at least a few fics.