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Still

i want to say im over it

that i don't miss you anymore

but i still think of you

when i hear love songs.

i still daydream

about the future we might've had

that i still wish we could have.

when im lonely and want to talk,

the first person i think of is you

and i still know your schedule

by heart.

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your daughter is dead and i rose from her corpse

you had another daughter once,

one who tried to find herself in what you gave her

in servitude and obedience

in respect and an absence of anger.

she is dead.

i try at every opportunity,

have been trying, for ages,

to rid myself of her ghost.

to scrub myself clean of

her blood, her heart, her skin

all full of death.

rid myself of

every sin she was taught she held

like a weed rooted in her heart,

every time she was told that the lord and savior

died because of her wickedness.

and because love was all sacrifice.

every fear secreted away, like the fear

of imperfection

because that would mean she deserved hell.

every uncertainty,

of all the times she called out for aid

and was turned away unanswered.

she died an unremarkable death

but a significant one.

she died on mission, sent to serve the lord

but instead she turned away.

she died to that world.

and i was given new life.

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computer

i think i did too many high-saturation colors in the back, but overall im fairly satisfied

30x30 pixels

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i did a wizard

did the one on the left at first, didn't like it, then remade it into the one on the right. maybe not the best but i think it's pretty good for my first character sprite.

16x32 pixels

i keep making more art and i can't stop lol im going to ride this out as long as i can

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apple exercise

working down through resolutions to practice and see how low i can go while still being recognizably the same item.

in order, 20x20, 15x15, 11x11, 9x9, 7x7, 5x5

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sunset

im really getting into pixel art apparently

100x100 pixels

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more pixel art (a bigger piece)

im not super happy with this but also sometimes you just have to call it done. i do like the larger stars though.

150x150 pixels

@mayhem-moth you wanted to see it

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Pixel art

been having some fun with a pixel art website i found https://www.pixilart.com/ and made a bunch of stuff.

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Every Humble Beauty In The World

You've always overlooked them.

The shiny little trinkets everywhere.

They lay in the street, in public parks,

in both parking lots and abandoned dirt lots.

Screws and gears, nuts and bolts,

rusted lengths of necklace chain,

and keys that go to nothing.

I pick up each one to go in my collection,

a shoebox full of pretty useless things.

I hid them before, so you wouldn't toss them out.

But I want you to know now.

I'm fixing the jacket you told me to throw away.

I've patched the holes at the pocket corners,

and reinforced the ripping seams.

But the button on the sleeve is still broken.

Every repair makes it feel more mine.

Please understand that it isn't a waste of time.

Remember the "weeds" you killed with salt last spring?

The tiny purple clusters of flowers

that bloom from sidewalk cracks

and the edges of lawns left unmown.

These, I have seen and found beautiful

every day since my childhood.

I finally found their name. They're called filaree.

You think grey and brown are ugly colors.

But grey is the color of storms and steel.

It is the color of fledgeling down and river stones.

Brown is the color of wood and soil,

of small animals in the grass,

the color of loved ones.

These colors may fade into the background,

but then their beauty is everpresent.

I know you think I'm childish and naive.

I just wish you could see what i do.

The dance of a wasp's flight,

the glide of a pencil when you write fast.

Is there not joy in finding a nice rock?

Just because they are small

does not diminish their wonders.

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It/Its

It

is the bluest depths of the sky. It

is the spans of lively desert. It

is the sharp caws of crows gathering on a pine tree in the suburbs. It

is the mid-afternoon sun in early August.

It

is the stone picked up off the ground, chosen out of dozens. It

is the jingle of collected can tabs on a carabiner. It

is the smell of sagebrush and rain. It

is the furry little jumping spider that sits with you a while.

It

is the big armchair in the back corner of a local library. It

is the warmth of a mug of apple cider. It

is the beating heart of the city, humming through the streets. It

is the heavy jacket, worn and patched and repaired.

It means no disrespect

when you say It properly.

So would you, perhaps, consider

that "It" could be me?

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taking pictures

experimenting with angles and composition a bit, really just having fun noticing features around me

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i have committed an art

drew a lovely spider i saw in my backyard, still needs some touchups to look it's best but i do like it at its current stage

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everyone saying "art doesn't need to be perfect" hasn't taken into account the art monster, the monster that comes and kills you if art doesn't look exactly like it did in your head

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lesbab snail

inspired by this post

not shaded because i didn't wanna(and because i had exactly 5 colors to work with while already trying something new), my forays into digital art on my phone continue

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a nice photo i just shot, maybe itcs low effort but whatever i like it

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prompt from a friend, shoutout to @mayhem-moth for this wonderful mental image

i made the wooly chafer beetle and the cards fly because i didn't wanna deal with physics, sue me