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Assorted pages from my sketchbook 💖

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An angsty angel in my sketchbook, drawn and painted over old sticky notes with various materials

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Sketchbook doodle of Tecna!! Painted and drawn over old sticky notes with various materials

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Sketchbook mermaid, painted with acrylics on top of sticky notes and other scraps of paper~

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Slow progress is progress

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Leaf and Petal 💚🧡 Alcohol markers, colored pencil, colored liner pens and acrylic paint on Bristol board.

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Baelia 💙 Alcohol markers and colored pencil.

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Small, Wounded Heart tray 💔 Air-dry clay, sealed, acrylic paint.

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As I sit in my comfy, American home, witnessing Palestinian genocide, my grief is teaching me. I can feel my grief expanding my heart so much that she bumps against the broken hearts of the world when she beats. The rage teaches, too.

I can't look away from people of the Gaza Strip. Men, women and children showing their barest humanity, to a phone camera, oftentimes speaking English because they understand many brutal truths. Even the children understand everything. 

I can't help but remember Emmett Till and his mother, Mamie Till-Mobley and how she chose to show America how white people murdered her son. I can't fathom the bravery, anger, grief and love it took for Mamie Till-Mobley to make that choice. In doing so, she and Emmett Till moved the needle toward Black liberation (although I would still prefer an alive and happy Emmett Till to be honest). 

I am witnessing this same phenomenon happen in a massive way in the Gaza Strip. Parents are showing us their murdered children, children are showing us their murdered parents and siblings, doctors are showing us their bombed hospitals and bodies of people they could not save. This display of unimaginable pain is a stoic form of nonviolent resistance, but it relies on an audience willing to witness, feel, learn and act. 

I will witness. I will feel. I will learn. I will act.

Let your heart be shattered. That is the correct response. Then, let your heart transform. I hope your heart beats with mine. 

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Detail shots of my newest painting, "Babyteeth Lost". Created with acrylic paint, glitter, and rhinestones, sealed in epoxy resin on 11"x14" stretched canvas, mounted on a beaded wire.

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Created with acrylic paint, glitter, and rhinestones, sealed in epoxy resin on 11"x14" stretched canvas, mounted on a beaded wire. A very sparkly acrylic painting depicts a skull with a missing front tooth and a pink bow in a swarm of venus flytraps. Within the plants, small tokens of childhood glitter: a Barbie head, familiar candy, half of a BFF necklace, a Hello Kitty keychain, pink nail polish, and plastic gems. Flesh flies mingle with the items -- one fly in particular is cleaning the inside of the skull's eye socket.

"Babyteeth Lost" represents how consumable I felt as a young girl; terrified to be devoured while growing my own teeth. At the same time, consumption defined much of my girlhood, finding identity in pink plastic marketing. With this work, I was pondering on that relationship: how the plastic remains while the girl is gone.

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A few things from my sketchbook from the last week or so. I decided to add color to existing ballpoint pen sketches of characters for a comic I'm attempting to develop. Adding color onto these doodles has been helpful in envisioning the character's personalities and figure out what I need to practice or change. Each drawing was done in ballpoint pen, watercolor, colored pencil, a brush-tipped lining pen, and acrylic paint. Once I get the hang of watercolor in my sketchbook, I have a pack of fancy watercolor paper that I'm excited to try out!

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Don't worry, these snails aren't coming to kill you, they're nice! 11"x17" poster-sized print on semi-gloss photo stock.

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To date, Another Day remains the largest painting I've completed, sized at 48"x26". I always keep this painting hanging in my home whenever it's not on display, and that is not because I think it's my best painting. Rather, this was a painting where I was more committed to simply getting the idea out on canvas instead of perfection. The result was having a large, interesting painting that provoked thought while being flawed. Of course, I would execute this painting differently now, but I think it's more important for me to appreciate the flaws, the learning process, and my own efforts.

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Within the last week or so I've made a lot of progress on "Babyteeth" -- my intention was to finish it by now, but the details take time. I enjoyed painting in the flies, they came out cuter than I imagined! I based their appearance on flesh flies: with their big, red compound eyes, two-toed feet and hariness. The idea behind this image is to create a collage of items familiar to my girlhood juxtaposed with venus fly traps, flies, and a small skull missing a front tooth. I seem to be thinking a lot about girlhood recently, as this painting was meant to reflect the consumable feeling of being a young girl. Created using heavy body acrylic paint and glitter on 11"x14" stretched canvas, to be sealed in epoxy resin and mounted on a wire.

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Everyone Grows Differently, a lesson from sunflowers and the earth. A few of these art prints with a holographic overlay are still in stock (9"x5") 🌻✨️

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In this sketchbook, I want to make sure the surface area of the pages are covered in some way. I've been going back over old sketches with watercolors, colored pencils, liner pens, and white Posca marker. I am definitely enjoying working with more color in my sketchbook!