cuvpake

[cuvpake]

MONARCH - BLEED

Where I'm from, self-destruction is not a rare sight.

Alcoholism, drugs, prostitution, gambling,... all that and more. Maybe it's just the nature of life in that damned place.

When we pass by a decaying body on the streets during scavenger hunts, we only offer them a prayer in hopes of better chances in their next lives. If you believe in that stuff, I guess.

Despite the number of endlessly creative ways we know of ending ourselves, one method is the most common, and painless.

We call it 'Bleed'

Despite the name, no blood is drawn but rather, they let their Pool bleed out until there is no more. On average, it takes about a day for a person to fully drain their Pool.

The only way we would know if a person had bled is if their limp body takes a few days to begin decaying. Though, that usually result in that person sitting on the street for days on end. A pretty grim sight, once you realized what was going on.

The religious folks at the coven said it was a gift from the gods, because people in the old world didn't have this mercy. I don't know what any of that means, but I don't believe it was a 'mercy' or whatever.

I bet those guys have never gone through anything even close to that feeling before. If they did, they would know it's everything but merciful having to resort to that method in the very first place. They don't know the struggle, and the resolve needed to go through with it. They've never had to sit alone with their thoughts while willingly let their life drains away..

It's a pretty lonely way to go, I thought. A fitting way for me, I thought. A life so insignificant and small.

I don't remember how old I was when I bled. All I know was that I wanted to be anywhere but here.

I bled for 7 days. I knew because the crappy microphone in the town's centre blared its weekly announcement.

During those 7 days, I thought about a lot of things. I don't think I've ever thought so much.

I stopped being hungry, and stopped feeling sleepy. I thought I had died, and remember being disappointed. You'd think dying would be more of nothing, and less of... everything.

I looked down to my hands then, except, they weren't my hands. I saw myself, my body, but I wasn't myself. It was then I realized, it wasn't that I don't want to be here, I only wanted to be anyone but myself.

If death was the same cruel world, then had I been like that butterfly.

We probably contributed the same, but its life must've been so much more freeing.

I reached out, without my body, and suddenly, I was that butterfly.

I could see through its eyes, and its flap its wings. I could remember the sweet scent of flowers it had flown through, and feel the wind coarsing through its tiny hairs.

I saw that girl, slumped in a sealed off alleyway. She had chosen this place to avoid being one of those spotless corpses on the open road, somewhere no one could find her at the end of her road.

And no one did. During those 7 days.

I flew away, and never saw her again.

[cuvpake]

After a lot of problems, I was able to finish drawing this. I really like the HC that Cyno is the last one to find out or notice that Kaveh and Hayi are dating. (btw sorry for disappearing so often, I'm working hard (┬┬﹏┬┬)

[cuvpake]

and your eyes look like coming home 

[cuvpake]

home is any four walls that enclose the right person 🤍

[cuvpake]

ISTG this will be the final straw for me to finally get into ZZZ. I hope we see more of them in the future

Hugo is really quite a case regarding his relationship with Lycaon.

He craves Lycaon's company and attention, but his self-loathing keeps getting in the way, stopping him from being fully honest about wanting to be friends again. Lycaon too is a curious case because, rather than falling for the taunting whenever they meet, he's serious, can even joke around, and displays actual concern for Hugo, even when Hugo dismisses him (at times gently, other times rudely)

But I feel the key to their current relationship is in one trust event that has them talking about their past. In here, Hugo can't help feel guilty about Lycaon's legs, only to have Lycaon say this:

That's when it hit me. Lycaon is waiting to have Hugo back, but this can only happen when Hugo heals and attains the peace he wanted after forgiving himself. At least we know he's already on that difficult path, but he's doing it on his own.

What makes this duo so special is that Lycaon knows this and has seen through all of Hugo's barriers, and is more than ready to being his friend again, but he's patiently waiting for Hugo to feel like someone capable to mend their relationship.

Like, ofc is hilarious to see them bickering, but Hugo's trust events are illuminating as we see the classic "Friends to enemies" trope not be reduced to them arguing whenever they see each other, but actually be awkward in the other's presence, or even being able to lovingly reminisce about their youth together, then deeply regret how bad decisions and miscommunication stopped them from helping each other, and the guilt they both feel regarding how things ended.

Hugo's the only one that participates in the intense teasing, and that's because constant taunting is his self-defense mechanism, since he refuses to be vulnerable to the only person that could see the worst of him; the memories of their separation play a part in his refusal to accepting Lycaon's help. However, he ignores that this time around, Lycaon wouldn't abandon him.

If anything, Lycaon is waiting for the instant Hugo's defenses break down to immediately catch him and be together again. And Hugo is.... Open to this, since another trust event has him saying that, depending on the future, Lycaon could be either friend or foe ( though we know he's betting on being together once again)

For Lycaon and Hugo, the resolution of their complex relationship is simply a matter of time now that they're in each other's lives once more, and destiny keeps making them cross paths constantly for a reason.

[cuvpake]

When we were young

[cuvpake]

dearest partner in crime

[cuvpake]

they have me in a chokehold. Oh how I wish to watch a 12 ep series about them and their misadventures, slowly watching them grow closer then eventually ripped apart due to differing ideals

Mockingbird era lycahugo you make me so so sad

[cuvpake]

[cuvpake]

biutiful

tell me lycaon, which part of me do you see in your eye?

[cuvpake]

I am CRAZY about them

SAVE ME LYCAHUGO… SAVE ME…

[cuvpake]

Portraits

[Characters from CTC]

[cuvpake]

BIRTH OF SIN (WIP)

Sin was the original Halfling. The first and strongest attempt beyond creation. It was conceived with the remnants of two beings - The prime Noctic and an unremarkable human.

It was simultaneously a succinct failure and overwhelming success. It took form as this being in its infantry, its form indistinct save for certain goat-like features on what it considered to be a head.

But it did not know anything.

Its power was immense. So much so that its acknowledgement only serves to fuel its maker's hubris. They started out small, testing its capabilities to understand language and cognitive functions. Through this process, they learned of its connection to the mind. Although it did not seem aware of its conception, it quickly learned the basic grasp of human behavior and thoughts by peering into the headspace of curious subjects. Time went on, and they continue 'raising' their 'newborn'. It was well-behaved, despite its unknowable capabilities. It began talking in simple sentences, began showing emotions despite its lack of defining facial features. It truly seems as though they have successfully delved beyond living by bringing this being into existence. 

The creature did not know of its significance

Yet, it does not go unnoticed how they have committed one of the most heinous sacrileges - to temp creation. They bounded two unwilling, living, intelligent beings to conceive their beloved newborn. Curiously, researchers of the human and Noctic race alike converse in hushed tones, about how this creature rivals that of previous mankind's original sins. But because things were as they were around the facilities, none of them dared mention it in the presence of the project's directors. 

But the creature was still a child of man. Its morbid curiosity lead to the death of an test rabbit one day. It was captivated by the pure, white, fluffy animal. Perhaps it saw the stark contrast between the pristine coat of the rabbit against its own darkened fur. Perhaps it saw itself in the unassuming animal, innocent, oblivious and wanted to get closer. Perhaps it was the desire to assimilate, to become whole with that which is so similar to it. Whatever the reason was, a sharp maw opened and swallowed the poor rabbit whole. 

But it did not know.

For the first time, the directors were made aware of its capabilities. Although the goat-like features and mind reading ability were formed from the likeness of the Prime Noctic, it also borrowed characteristics from the sacrificed human such as twisted arms and gnawing teeth. As the indiscriminate void contorts the blood stains on the creature's body, the directors thought of an idea that would mark the beginning of the end. 

They introduced the creature to small, docile animals. But instead of encouraging it to interact, they urged it to attack, once again testing its abilities. The creature made quick work of the little critters. The directors began testing it on bigger, larger, more fearsome animals. Once its jaw couldn't swallow the target whole, the animal began to struggle and fight back. The creature was stunned, and pushed down. Although its skin cannot sustain damage, it is clear that the mere allusion of an injury sparked something new within the being - fear. It violently wrestles with the injured tiger, but the animal was relentless. As it rear its being towards its guardians - the directors - for aid, they merely stares it down, intent on watching.

The creature let out distorted cry for help, yet no one came.

 The mounting tiger pressed it down further, until a crooked arm stretched out from the void that constitute the creature's body and digs its finger into the tiger's neck. The fierce animal loosen its grip, enough for the creature to open its jaws and bite off the tiger's head. 

Though the previous lessons taught it about knowledge, idea and benevolence, this lesson began its track into fear, uncertainty and violence.

They continue raising by feeding it facts and teaching it as a normal guardian would, but at the same time, they also subject it to harsher, more challenging tests of grit. It has always been a quick learner, as it allows its fear and thirst for violence to take over whenever it needs to use physical force. Soon, its targets were not animals but buildings, constructions, its enemy were no longer beasts but armed humans and Noctics. 

The training increased in frequency. Eventually, it is able to level entire cities on its own, at the order of the directors. Unbeknownst to it, the creature was now a bargaining tool for domination among great powers that wish to rule the land. 

It is now constantly drenched in bloodshed and pained cries of others, but its education continues. The once benevolent creature is no more. 

But it did not know of anything different.

The directors quicky rose to power by the leverage that is the ungodly creation. The story of the Halfling that totals entire nations spread far and wide. This did not escape the creature's ears as people calls to it by name of Abominable Halfling, The Great Sacrilege or Original Sin. Even from before its first act of violence, the creature acknowledges that it has always been regarded as such. Thus, it took to the title: 'Sin' though it does not know what it means.

Sin's power rapidly grows. Not only its physical capabilites exceed that of the most modern destruction technology at the time, it also developed its mind reading abilities. Sin peers into the subject's head, digging deep into their mind's eye, picking out the ugly and the abhorrent to appear to them as a mockery of their own sins. 

Education in regards to knowledge has completely ceased as Sin's new purpose is solely destruction and chaos.

The directors decided, a being that possess such control over countless lives should be comparable to the gods, as it has become the antithesis of creation. With a declaration, they presented the creature to meet The Gods. They hoped, that with this newest achievement, their efforts will be acknowledge by their maker. 

But The Gods knew, under their breath, they aspire to one day usurp the throne and replace the rulers of the realm. 

Such arrogance, thought Lereus, so repulsed by mankind's hubris that it refused to participate in the offering ceremony. Begphin, ever the benign God, 

lowered his elevation to appear before the creation. She does not miss the way some directors' brow furrowed upon noticing the absence of their twin.

Sin, heralded as Heaven's Equal, stood on a raised pedestal that touched the clouds. In front of it shows a being as bright as the midday sun and as deep as the endless vacuum of space. It does not lower it stature nor bow, as it did not know of such etiquettes. Noctickind witness in awe and amazement as their creator glide down, her form taking all kinds of shapes in both lightness and darkness, while humanity can only turn their heads in wonder and anticipation of The God's judgement.

A wave of sorrow washes over all creations of the night as The God's light wavers and flickers. Begphin griefs over what has become of its firstborn. All Noctics are kin of the Lunar Mother, and they all share his pains. To her first kin, The Prime Noctic, he grants it the gift of conscience and connections, yet that gift was distorted and mangled, abused by mankind and its own kind. The Prime Noctic bonded with a human, and they were both executed for it. Not for a heresy, but for the connection that they formed that the directors took notice. Their forced reunion brought upon this creature that calls itself Sin.

[cuvpake]

I LOVETHEM RAHHHHHHH

Do you need a hug?

[Characters from CTC]

[cuvpake]

Compiling my most cursed dvattra drawings including shrek AU

[cuvpake]

I feel like this official zhanyi art is slept on

[cuvpake]

Just got into this fandom recently and i am so devastated that they didnt get a season 2

THIS BAND IS BACK!