cyanidas - Tumblr blog

[cyanidas]

🃏 Kokichi Ouma Age-up Timeline 🍇

Here, I've used his initial designs as inspiration! I like looking back at older designs cause for a lot of them, it's like watching them grow up!

Headcanons under cut (HUUUGE SPOILER WARNING FOR DRV3)

(Content Warning for child abuse, mental illness and disorder, self harm, generally dark and unsettling topics ahead)

-=-

First off, I'm firm in my take that Tsumugi was lying about everyone being fictional. There's a lot that doesn't match up, and the local V3 fandom celebrity responsible for the Amalgamate fic has helped me tremendously in solidifying my stance. I think they absolutely do belong to the DR universe, but the memories they get that aren't part of their backstory are completely fabricated.

If there's any additional input on V3 in Raincode, don't let me know because I haven't played yet ;w;

That said, there's many things I, like Kokichi, will refuse to clarify or elaborate on. His character demands mystery, and it would be a trivialization of his writing to just. lay it all out there. I think approaching his writing with the mindset of knowing the whole truth would be to bastardize his integrity and simplify him in a distasteful way - so all my headcanons here will be written and are intended to be seen as broad strokes as opposed to finely tuned detail.

-=-

I like to think of his past as muddy and confusing, even to him. There's not a lot he can remember clearly, and constantly confuses different takes on his memories. To me, it's clear that lying is a huge trauma thing to him - I would assume multiple sources would be responsible, like authority, family, and peers.

He's been lying as a means of survival, with multiple layers of how he feels about it - despite what he says, there's not actually one truth. Multiple truths exist for one single thing, and I think that mindset is something that scares him tremendously - he'd probably say that reality is just a lie you tell yourself, in order to justify trivializing and minimizing both feelings/emotion and trauma.

In his head, there's so much wrong with him that he can't even begin to unravel himself and understand everything that's happened to him, why he does what he does, why he feels what he feels... so on. He feels multiple things that often contradict each other, and he doesn't know how to understand that, so he often switches his justifications to suit whatever narrative he needs to cope.

In general, however, he claims he's just lying. There are in fact, genuine times he does actually lie... but rather than being a true compulsive liar, he is actually a compulsive method actor. He's so empathetic to everything and everyone, that he can easily switch his masking techniques to suit whatever he or others need, and does so involuntarily most of the time, though he does know how to "switch it on" purposefully.

In his earlier ages, he may have suffered from a guardianship similar to what those who have DID had gone through (not me projecting lol /hj). He's been bred and born into tragedy, not unlike Komaeda but absolutely distinct from him in that I do not believe this boy has had any good luck with anything in his life - not family, not friends, not money, nothing. I might even go so far as to assume that, similar to Yasuhiro having an unnaturally high good luck, Kokichi is suffering from unnaturally high bad luck.

I noticed that, on a lot of his designs, he seems to have always had *something* covering at least one of his hands - and even on his final design, though it could just be a design fluke or something weird with perspective I misunderstood, you can see the smallest scrap of fabric underneath his right sleeve that could be seen as another hand/wrist covering. When lined up with the other designs, it could very easily be taken as a wrist bandage - at least by my eyes. So, I (and a lot of others it seems, especially those who identify with him) have taken this to mean he may in fact be self-harming, and has been for a long while. Anyone who hyperfixates on this guy wouldn't be surprised in the slightest if that turned out to be true.

I think that age 11 is probably what Kokichi himself would think of as his 'turning point', just going off of my little chart here; something tremendously awful happened to him, then. To fuel speculation and abide by his character rules, all I'm going to definitively say is... he likely wouldn't even trust doctors with a needle, let alone his life.

So, the hardest year of any modern kid's life... 12 years old. In my family especially, it's the worst year you'll ever face, and my god was that true for me. So I think this year fits him for gaining his... as the creators put it, 'otherworldly' expressive nature. This is the year he completely stops putting effort into trying to understand the truth, and fully embraces the chaos that is his reality. He's fine!!!!!! :)))))

He mellows out around 15, and I like to think of this year as his cringe-fail-iest year to date. This motherfucker would likely be seen in Hot Topic, jamming to MCR, glomping his friends, verbally roleplaying, so forth. His phone signature is a series of kaomojis. Idk if there's a similar equivalent of being a cringe baby weeb for Japanese who are my age, so I'm really just basing this on my own experience of being 15 in 2011. But whatever the equivalent is, he is absolutely it. 15 year old Kokichi is current Kokichi's most embarrassing time ever.

However, it's also likely the age he started his talent's namesake - of becoming the Ultimate Supreme Leader. Which, I choose to believe is, much like Kokichi in general, both true and false. Same for his actual group, DICE. Both is good ;o)

Following his talent, he has a natural command to his voice that feels as though you're forced to hear him speak. No one can really talk over him unless their ability to do so demands it - say for example, Sonia, the SHSL Princess. Due to the nature of their talents, I think Sonia's voice and ability to command would absolutely trump Kokichi's. However, due to the aforementioned bad luck, people are compelled to not trust him - even if what he's saying is true. (Kokichi voice: oh pythia we're really in it now)

Also, you can't really tell because of all the scarring, but 15 and 19 are the ages where he stopped going outside so he's paler and paler, lol

And my last one, I love to imagine that due to his talent, he's actually intensely adept at fighting, especially dodging. In fact, I think he's even way smarter than he'd like to believe!

[cyanidas]

@ TNT this is her application, please hire my girlfriend as loremaster, thank u

psst hey hi hello two things: 1, I LOVE Cellia sm and 2, how do you think she would react to meeting/interacting with Fyora the Faerie Queen?

hi!! thank you!!! i was so happy when i got this ask <3<3<3 i immediately started working on some Things for her...

i imagine she would not like her very much >w>

with the help of my now-girlfriend @pewycert, who is a walking neopets encyclopedia and history book (TNT should hire her as loremaster and that is NOT a joke i am NOT exaggerating i genuinely firmly believe she should be the loremaster. TNT if you see this pls dm her) - she basically handed me Cellia's backstory on a silver platter so i'm not responsible for thinking of this but;

basically, in "the old world" (as i like to imagine Fyora would refer to it) when Tyrannia was actively being encased in ice, Cellia was one of the first to receive that punishment due to her...... unconventional appetite.

She was the last to be freed from her permaice caverns - where, fun fact, she was dreamily aware of the ages passing by, and could see the Negg faerie from where she was frozen, hence the random crush I gave her on Kari.

But, Cellia never forgot Fyora's betrayal...

(click/tap for quality) - also, in drawing this i realized that Man my faerie girl is Wayyy too detailed to match the neopets style. so i beefed up Fyora's design to match hers, and i wanna make a downgraded / source-accurate version of Cellia to match owo

i cant guarantee that Fyora wouldn't try to imprison her again instantly 😂 she seems like the type to automatically revoke hope for this faerie. but she's right, though. Cellia does not understand why her way of eating is so repulsive, and it's not like she hates neopets - FARRR from it! she just thinks theyre suuuper tasty is all 😅 but, suffice to say, she's so simple-minded that she is Not the type to be 'rehabilitated' (as Fyora puts it in reference to Xandra...)

this piece more shows how Cellia feels about Fyora than anything that would actually happen lol - in reality I think she would be terrified of her and do anything - ANYTHING - to hide from her. besides, i wanted to draw Cellia properly gremlinning out 😂😂

so yes! thank you for asking!!! im absolutely delirious with joy and pride and Autism for someone being interested in my OCs unprompted ;;u;; you are like the unicorn of the artist world and i just gotta say thats so brave and badass of you and i hope you find a $50 bill on the ground (or whatever that equivalent is in wherever you live) and best of all, you get to keep it <3

[cyanidas]

psst hey hi hello two things: 1, I LOVE Cellia sm and 2, how do you think she would react to meeting/interacting with Fyora the Faerie Queen?

hi!! thank you!!! i was so happy when i got this ask <3<3<3 i immediately started working on some Things for her...

i imagine she would not like her very much >w>

with the help of my now-girlfriend @pewycert, who is a walking neopets encyclopedia and history book (TNT should hire her as loremaster and that is NOT a joke i am NOT exaggerating i genuinely firmly believe she should be the loremaster. TNT if you see this pls dm her) - she basically handed me Cellia's backstory on a silver platter so i'm not responsible for thinking of this but;

basically, in "the old world" (as i like to imagine Fyora would refer to it) when Tyrannia was actively being encased in ice, Cellia was one of the first to receive that punishment due to her...... unconventional appetite.

She was the last to be freed from her permaice caverns - where, fun fact, she was dreamily aware of the ages passing by, and could see the Negg faerie from where she was frozen, hence the random crush I gave her on Kari.

But, Cellia never forgot Fyora's betrayal...

(click/tap for quality) - also, in drawing this i realized that Man my faerie girl is Wayyy too detailed to match the neopets style. so i beefed up Fyora's design to match hers, and i wanna make a downgraded / source-accurate version of Cellia to match owo

i cant guarantee that Fyora wouldn't try to imprison her again instantly 😂 she seems like the type to automatically revoke hope for this faerie. but she's right, though. Cellia does not understand why her way of eating is so repulsive, and it's not like she hates neopets - FARRR from it! she just thinks theyre suuuper tasty is all 😅 but, suffice to say, she's so simple-minded that she is Not the type to be 'rehabilitated' (as Fyora puts it in reference to Xandra...)

this piece more shows how Cellia feels about Fyora than anything that would actually happen lol - in reality I think she would be terrified of her and do anything - ANYTHING - to hide from her. besides, i wanted to draw Cellia properly gremlinning out 😂😂

so yes! thank you for asking!!! im absolutely delirious with joy and pride and Autism for someone being interested in my OCs unprompted ;;u;; you are like the unicorn of the artist world and i just gotta say thats so brave and badass of you and i hope you find a $50 bill on the ground (or whatever that equivalent is in wherever you live) and best of all, you get to keep it <3

[cyanidas]

What scenes from SDR2 do you think would be paramount to getting Nagito Komaeda's full range of emotion? Preferably ones that are voiced :o

[cyanidas]

post-NWP despair-free komaeda re-learning to parent the kids like ^

[cyanidas]

Everyone's mounting replies continue to fill me with love and determination

Bonus, my favorites so far;

i imagine kyoko would see kokichi approaching her and just be on sight with that mf and read his ass like a book

[cyanidas]

i imagine kyoko would see kokichi approaching her and just be on sight with that mf and read his ass like a book

[cyanidas]

he's thinking evil (read: gay) thoughts

[cyanidas]

/flops

[cyanidas]

we stan.... an emo boy 🫰😔

[cyanidas]

this is for julia and anyone else who's cried ugly tears for Gundam

@cyanidasmain and @lalnamagic have been watching me play Danganronpa 2 for the very first time.

I, uh, just beat chapter 4 :(

[cyanidas]

that one scene from DR3 but komaeda is there to wish his baby good luck <3

[cyanidas]

i'm watching the DR anime and i needed to share with yall my reaction to seeing Togami

[cyanidas]

i have danganronpa brainrot and my hyperfixation gets so bad that i cant focus on anything irl without going "nagito komaeda would think this is a waste since im not really talented at this" or "kokichi ouma would think this is boring" because i have weird autism depression

so anyway i found a workaround, that if i imagine im sitting down my comfort characters and explaining to them why it is im building furniture for myself instead of just buying new pieces or having someone else do it for me, it... helps me actually do what i need to do without feeling like im letting them down 😅

also it is the funniest fucking thing to picture myself explaining to 18-year-old japanese juggalo loki the financial crisis of the united states of america circa 2020-2024

[cyanidas]

still not happy about the transphobia but i am pleased to know i have the option to turn AI tracking off, though I think it's ridiculous you have to manually tick them for each and every sideblog...

anyway, unless tumblr fumbles this shit im returning to posting here

...mkayy well

since tumblr ceo and local bitchbrat whatshisname or whatever is being transphobic and selling artist's shit for AI reasons, i'll be Nightshading my work here and continuing my lack of interaction with social media until dipshit is evicted and we have new owners :I

i'll look for other places to post my work as well. probably patreon, which needs to be remade anyways. i'll still keep my art and discord free to the public no matter what i do / where i go from here, but depending on how this ceo goes, it might result in me finally abandoning this place 😥 i dont want to, of course, but. yknow.

[cyanidas]

...mkayy well

since tumblr ceo and local bitchbrat whatshisname or whatever is being transphobic and selling artist's shit for AI reasons, i'll be Nightshading my work here and continuing my lack of interaction with social media until dipshit is evicted and we have new owners :I

i'll look for other places to post my work as well. probably patreon, which needs to be remade anyways. i'll still keep my art and discord free to the public no matter what i do / where i go from here, but depending on how this ceo goes, it might result in me finally abandoning this place 😥 i dont want to, of course, but. yknow.

[cyanidas]

bonus sketch i think u guys might like ovo

commission for my wonderful friend @doctorbethanysartblog who was able to help me out once again ;w;