dannyslayeee

[dannyslayeee]

WAIT OK....SO HIS BOOBS WERE JUST ENTIRELY OUT THERE UNDERNEATH THAT TUNIC?????

[dannyslayeee]

insane skinny leg daniel pull

[dannyslayeee]

Come back😭

the danny slay will never die...

[dannyslayeee]

you may pick one scrungle to cheat death and make it into the quartersemifinals.

This is Harpo Marx and Peter Falk's fault. "Why these guys?" Because I'm giving you some redemption now make the right choices

[dannyslayeee]

Danny Kaye (The Court Jester, The Inspector General)—Danny Kaye, idol of my childhood, maker of the weirdest faces! This man SETS HIMSELF ON FIRE and then puts himself out in a bucket in a movie based on a Gogol short story. In the same movie (Inspector General), he flirts by playing a carrot as a musical instrument. In Wonder Man, he's brilliant but struggles with things like riding buses. I have been envious of his fake Italian/French/German/Spanish monologues in The Court Jester for the past three decades. As Walter Mitty, he is SUPREMELY SILLY yet also somehow manages to be a comic foil for none other than Boris Karloff. All this is to say nothing of The William Tell Song (TV, thus not linked, but great.) I adore him.

Buster Keaton (Sherlock Jr., One Week)—Grandfather of slapstick and did a lot of great stunts for comedy including the first having a set piece down with him standing in the doorway still referenced today, riding a cow catcher on a locomotive, and falling from a third story building through two awnings grabbing a rain gutter falling forward and then going through a window.

This is round 5 of the contest. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. If you’re confused on what a scrungle is, or any of the rules of the contest, click here.

[additional submitted propaganda + scrungly videos under the cut]

Danny Kaye:

He's so stupid. I love him.

Buster Keaton:

Many scrungly little guys look as if they're falling down a staircase. Buster Keaton actually IS falling down a staircase, every day of his life. Also, truly committing to the "little" part at around 5 foot 5. This competition will be the revenge of the short kings or I will die trying.

Link to the Coney Island fancam

First, he kind of looks like a Dollar Store Charlie Chaplin. Just absolutely busted Chaplin. Second, he's lanky and awkward and he's like if Doug Jones had been plopped into the silent movie era. He looks like a cartoon come to life. He looks like if you gave a chihuahua a human body and slightly less anxiety. And because it's silent films for the most part, it really does look like a cartoon character irl.

[dannyslayeee]

babes come over and we'll get geeked off the danny kaye wine 🤪😝🤯

[dannyslayeee]

LAST POLL OF ROUND 4

Danny Kaye (The Court Jester, The Inspector General)—Danny Kaye, idol of my childhood, maker of the weirdest faces! This man SETS HIMSELF ON FIRE and then puts himself out in a bucket in a movie based on a Gogol short story. In the same movie (Inspector General), he flirts by playing a carrot as a musical instrument. In Wonder Man, he's brilliant but struggles with things like riding buses. I have been envious of his fake Italian/French/German/Spanish monologues in The Court Jester for the past three decades. As Walter Mitty, he is SUPREMELY SILLY yet also somehow manages to be a comic foil for none other than Boris Karloff. All this is to say nothing of The William Tell Song (TV, thus not linked, but great.) I adore him.

Donald O'Connor (Singin' in the Rain, Francis, Call Me Madam)— LOOK AT HIM. Those giant blue peepers. Those tappy tappy little feet that don't quit. The ears that stick out like little wings, ready to lift him up to goofy heaven. The way his face contorts into the strangest yet most endearing expressions. His ability to sing and dance alongside the hunk that is Gene Kelly and yet pull all attention away with his big-eyed buffoonery. The way his energy is unmatched in songs like "Make 'em laugh" - bouncing off the walls and tumbling through the air straight into my cold cold heart. Who else but a true scrungly lil guy would sit upon the witness stand and defend a talking mule with all the love and affection in the world - staring out into the court room with his bright wide eyes and eternally mouse-like expression, openly admitting that the mule is his best friend?!??! I see him and I want to pull him from the screen into my hand and just squiiiiiiiiiiiiish with all my might. I want to pinch his cheeks and have him bat those eyes at me. He just makes me go "eeehehehehehe" every time I see him and his silly little self. He is pure chaotic, ridiculous, scrungly perfection!

This is round 4 of the contest. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. If you’re confused on what a scrungle is, or any of the rules of the contest, click here.

[additional submitted propaganda + scrungly videos under the cut]

Danny Kaye:

He's so stupid. I love him.

Donald O'Connor:

My silliest little guy. My funnyman. My horsie. I have watched many a bad movie for this man. The scrungliest fact I know about him is that he was supposed to star as Danny Kaye's role in the iconic White Christmas (1954), as he had known Bing Crosby since he was a child, but couldn't because he caught a mule disease while working on those Francis the Talking Mule films Universal endlessly made him do. I wouldn't exactly recommend those movies, but Don's character getting psychologically tormented by a sardonic mule does make for quite a good movie night, if you know what you're getting into. Are You With It? is another one I don't exactly recommend, but it does open with Donald as a math genius actuary who is about to kill himself over a displaced decimal point before getting taken in by a traveling carny instead. His more well-known and beloved roles have plenty of scrungliness too, in my opinion. This man slapsticked so hard he wound up bedridden for his physical exertion! Rather than submitting Make 'Em Laugh, which the electorate has likely already seen (I hope), I'm submitting an underrated dance number of his, where he explains maths through tap dance. That movie is Not good, but god do I love him in that role.

I think it's arguably very scrungly to seemingly be a real life cartoon character made out of rubber, as proven by how slapsticky the list of scrunglies is so far. In which case, Donald O'Connor? He scrungles supremely. He even played Buster Keaton in a movie (that apparently can't be recommended, but still).

[dannyslayeee]

i am deeply ashamed of the danny kaye nation's performance in recent polls...do we even like that man 😭

[dannyslayeee]

okkkkkkk work it diva-id daniel kaminsky!

[dannyslayeee]

Basil Rathbone and Nigel Bruce (The Sherlock Holmes films)—This is one where I'll have to bend the definition of a romantic couple but in the two movies I can think of, The Adventures of Sherlock Homes (1939) and The Woman in Green (1945) they have scenes together that would have absolutely been romantic had the two onscreen been hetero. Sherlock repeatedly tells Watson how much he means to him, even letting Moriarity escape once because he believed Watson was held hostage. If that's not love, I don't know what is.

Danny Kaye and Virginia Mayo (A Song Is Born, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty)—the dynamic is something like "confident blonde with wild backstory bewitches nervous, awkward fool into becoming the protagonist, and I love that for them".

This is round 1 of a mini Christmas tournament. Each poll lasts for three days. If you'd like to send additional propaganda supporting your favorite hot couple, you can reblog this post with your propaganda added, send it to my asks, or tag me in it. To vote in all the polls, click here. Happy holidays!

[no additional propaganda submitted]

[dannyslayeee]

I know they won't be allowed in because they just did the one movie together, but in the spirit of the holidays I want to give a shout out to Danny Kaye and Bing Crosby in White Christmas because those two definitely explored each other's bodies while they did showbiz together - their whole patter in the dressing room at the beginning while they casually change and toss articles of clothing to each other, every time Danny Kaye points to his "injured" arm and Bing Crosby rolls his eyes affectionately, how they know each other's bullshit thought patterns so well... It's all just such old married couple bickering (ignore that the bickering is about how one of them should find a girl to settle down with)

ok fine

[dannyslayeee]

THE HOT MEDIEVAL & FANTASY MEN MELEE

SECOND ROUND: 10th Tilt

Hubert Hawkins, The Court Jester (1955) VS. Samwise Gamgee, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy (2001-2003)

Propaganda

Hubert Hawkins, The Court Jester (1955) Portrayed by: Danny Kaye Defeated Opponents: - Saburo Naotora Ichimonji [Ryu Daisuke], Ran (1985) - Haldir [Craig Parker], The Lord of the Rings Trilogy (2001-2003)

“he's hot both in “local out of his depth idiot mode” and “over the top romantic hero mode”. he fences like nobody's business. he's the only man of all time to pull off a jester outfit and make it look actually snatched. Danny Kaye needs this, please.”

Samwise Gamgee, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy (2001-2003) Portrayed by: Sean Astin Defeated Opponents: - Rand al’Thor [Josha Stradowski], The Wheel of Time (2021-) - Sir Leon [Rupert Young], BBC’s Merlin (2008-2012)

“Prime husband material. The bestest man -er, Hobbit. HE'S A GARDNER. He hits orcs with a frying pan. HE CAN'T CARRY IT FOR YOU BUT HE CAN CARRY YOU-!”

Additional Propaganda Under the Cut

Additional Propaganda

For Hubert Hawkins:

“He sings! He dances! He fences! He wears really tight leggings!”

“We love a hot, funny, good-hearted man who subverts the gendered tropes of the subgenre! He is absolutely shit at sword-fighting! He is great at doing funny voices! ‘Tenderness and kindness can also make a man,’ says the awesome trousers-wearing heroine who works alongside him in the anti-tyrannical resistance, ‘a very rare man.’ She's right and she should say it and I support them both so much. Hubert Hawkins, world's sweetest and funniest surprise regent (who gets the girl.) See also attached photo of him goofing around with drums on set, I love him so much.”

For Sam Gamgee:

“He is the ideal man. He cooks, he gardens, he's loyal, he'd follow you to the ends of the (Middle) Earth while only mildly complaining. He's so loveable. I love him. He probably gives awesome hugs and never says an unkind word about anyone except for Gollum but Gollum kinda deserved it for calling Sam fat. He is also, reportedly, an awesome dad. I love Samwise Gamgee so much. He's such a teddy bear I love him so much. Frodo should've married him.”

[dannyslayeee]

Danny Kaye (January 18, 1911– March 3, 1987)

[dannyslayeee]

danny kaye cunty eyeliner era?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

[dannyslayeee]

shaking rn guys i can't fucking believe this......david daniel kaminsky smoked the marijuanas.....that sick and twisted man how did i ever like him!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[dannyslayeee]

[dannyslayeee]

what if i collapsed and screamed and moaned and wailed and rolled around on the ground and tore my hair out and wailed some more and wept and died