darkiris-bloodmagic

[darkiris-bloodmagic]

So im old & have no idea how tumblr works, so I have to go make a whole new account to get my notifications to show up properly. So pls follow me at darkiris-bloodmagistraite & I'll be reblogging everything from here then archiving this url!!

[darkiris-bloodmagic]

Astarion fights back against the "sexy suave vampire" trope by being a fucked up weirdo with a poor social filter who walks into a room and says whatever off-putting commentary that pops into his head. Someone commented it as "brain to mouth waterslide" behavior and I could not agree more. His smooth brain lets those thoughts slide off faster.

[darkiris-bloodmagic]

Balder's Gate 3 characters will look at you with the biggest, wettest eyes and then ask you to let them do the worst thing imaginable.

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i love them for real

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what not drawing for 2 weeks does to a mf

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Relax 📙🐶

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today i offer you a soft astarion covered in blood

[darkiris-bloodmagic]

I just went back & found my dream guardian from my 1st playthrough as a druid (who I'm starting over & may make an entire other blog for 😬)

Hmmmm I wonder who this looks like 💀

Also going to make a post showing Iris slowly morphing into their "softened" look preeettttyyy soon, just going back through old screen shots from before I made the blog right now.

Even tho I'm in act 3 I'll probably be backtracking to act 2 because that's when I had some of my favorite narrative development from Iris & Astarion, and some of the screenshots I got from that time are so sweet 🫶🏻

[darkiris-bloodmagic]

My thoughts on finishing the Cazador fight & completing Astarion's personal quest (TW abuse/murder/SA)

Oh my gods. What a fucking ride.

While I knew overall how things were going to go, I kept myself mostly spoiler free & I'm so glad I did. I had no idea he was going to let loose and then sob like that & I was sobbing right with him.

Trying not to down play my own abuse in typing this out, because its still pretty mild in comparison to a lot of other abuse other ppl faced at the hands of this person, but it's mine & it was horrible & I experienced it. And I know this to be true because I knew exactly what that driving feeling Astariom had was. That scream. Those knife motions. For a moment, he had control & it didn't feel anything like he thought.

I want my abuser dead & I wish I felt worse saying it. But I don't. I know his life would be best served in the ground. Nothing he has done or will do will ever change this for me. So, watching Astarion drain the life from Cazador was a catharsis. One that I didn't realize I needed myself. I know it's a fantasy & a chance I'll never get, nor is a position I'd want to be in. So I watched him stab his master. And I cried. And I cried. And I remembered that in 1 year, 7 years will have passed since we last touched, and the skin cells that my abuser knew are no longer on my body.

In a year, my skin won't know any of him. And for me, that's when I'll be free. My own personal Cazador will be vanquished.

Despite the fact that 7 years have almost passed, I still get ghostly moments where I can feel his handprint he left on me. I can still remember his weight on top of me after telling him to put protection on & refusing. I remember being treated like a toy that was only available to be used & not loved completely. It left me with hypersexuality that ruined relationships after he left. And then the lack of sexuality I have now as a result that is ruining more.

The lies, the sneaking around, holding him sobbing after HE confessed to cheating on me. I remember all of it, and the things I don't remember are for the better. And I wasn't even his worst victim. I was the one he used to make others' lives worse. In my eyes, I was Astarion because I was the blueprint, the experiment, the pet, the "best" he's ever had, and that was the thing that kept me coming back begging for scraps because I didn't know what else genuine love was at that point. I was just 18 and 19 years old, and even though we were the same age, it was old enough to know it was wrong. He always knew it was wrong.

My love, my darling pale elf, you've shown me what living with the weight of these memories can do to someone and how we can overcome them no matter how long it's been.

Neil Newbon is a treasure, a gift to the fantasy world, and to see other victims being able to tell their stories in such creative ways is fulfilling. While he was never entitled to share his story, the fact that he has been open about how these are his own emotions and experiences he's pulling from means the world.

We make our own choices now. It doesn't matter if they're good or bad. It's ours to make.

[darkiris-bloodmagic]

Mr "you trusted me when it was objectively a stupid thing to do": won't bite you in the forest scene unless you invite him.

[darkiris-bloodmagic]

One of the reasons I have a hard time reading astarion smut is that you can't convince me spawn act3 would be a serious lover with dirty talk and whatever. That he'd do all the SmutFic.mp4 lines where if you Ctrl+f his name and replace it with another characters it would still make sense.

He'd be having fun. He'd be laughing. He'd be a goofball. We've all seen what love does to this bastard. It amps up his silliness. The man who says "Delicious!" in that way after a kiss. He spent such a long time saying all the perfect words and doing the perfect moves to min/max it all. No. The man is in love for the first time. He is going to have fun, he's going to be present, and he's not gonna rush any of it. Send tweet.

[darkiris-bloodmagic]

Don't be afraid. to make. astarion. cringy. in fics.

He is a dork. He is a silly little freak who grants you 5+ approval if you let yourself be whipped by a priest. Also 5+ if you let him open the barn door. He hasn't had an extended conversation with a normal person in several years. He will ask completely unhinged questions and make puns. The smooth facade literally falls apart the instant he feels safe with someone.

Even when he doesn't feel safe, he believes that his pick up lines are great.

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When it's too high for your elf rogue to jump

Based on this goofy sheep from this post

[darkiris-bloodmagic]

"Before confession"