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[defiantsuggestions]

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[defiantsuggestions]

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[defiantsuggestions]

you're not a monster. you're you. you're flawed, yes, but you're also incredibly alive. just human. real. capable of great things, capable of change and growth, too. don't define yourself by the inner critic lashing out at you. you're not your worst moments.

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The fact that homelessness is controversial tells you everything you need to know about conservatives.

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At some point in your life, you were taught that being slightly annoying is an unforgivable sin. Maybe it was by your parents or a teacher or a friend or a bully or an older sibling. But someone taught you that being slightly annoying is a crime punishable by death.

You must unlearn this.

You must accept that all people will be annoying at some point or another in their lives, maybe all of their lives, and that this is okay. It is okay for strangers on the bus, it is okay for children in the grocery store, it is okay for people on social media, and it is okay for you.

If you ever want to truly love your fellow humans, if you ever want to truly love yourself, you must have forgiveness for being annoying.

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Hey

You're important

Please take care of yourself

Drink water. Eat something. Rest if you need to. Do something fun.

You deserve good things

I'm proud of you

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Destroying yourself over your mistakes will not make those mistakes go away, nor will it make you feel better.

It is better to utilize your mistakes as a lesson instead, that you will do better in the future.

You are human. You will make mistakes. There is no such thing as perfection. Be kind to yourself.

You can't be perfect at everything all the time, and holding yourself to that standard will do more harm than good.

No amount of guilt or wishing you could do things differently will change the past. It’s okay to forgive yourself for the mistakes you’ve made and look to your future.

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It's a lot healthier to go for a daily walk than to sign up for a gym membership you won't be using because you hate that kind of exercise. It's a lot healthier to eat a frozen meal than to skip a meal because you were too tired to cook something healthy. It's a lot healthier to take a quick shower than to procrastinate an elaborate routine for days. Don't aim so high that you won't be hitting anything!

[defiantsuggestions]

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[defiantsuggestions]

Why is it when we say "don't blame mental disorders for your abuse" people immediately jump to """YOU'RE DEFENDING ABUSERS AND INVALIDATING MY SUFFERING"""

No. No no no no no. We are not excusing abusive behavior, and we believe you when you say you suffered.

Your abuse was real and you should have been treated better, and there is no excuse for what was done to you.

We're just saying, "don't attack people who are just trying to exist."

Those are two separate statements. Why do you not see that those are two separate statements?

Your abuse was real! Just quit attacking unrelated people over it! Your trauma doesn't give you the right to hurt whoever you deem a convenient target! Abuse is the problem. The lack of resources and support for victims is the problem. Not people suffering from a disorder. You are attacking strangers who have never so much as spoken to you, you are assuming people you have never met are cruel and evil for the crime of their brain working a little differently than yours. That is the problem.

The answer to your suffering is not going to come from screaming at people who were never involved with your situation. You are lashing out at the wrong thing.

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I was browsing tumblr comments earlier(terrible idea I know). Came across one that was like, "hey. You. Stop reading the comments. You know they're all upsetting. Don't seek out anger."

And you know what? I closed the comments and did something else.

So here's your reminder to check in with yourself. Are you doing things that will serve no other purpose than to negatively impact you? Please stop, and go do something good for you instead.

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I exist.

I do not need to make myself small. I do not need to feel bad for taking up space.

I am allowed thoughts and opinions.

I'm allowed to ask for things.

It is not my job to avoid annoying people.

I exist and I am allowed to be here and I do not need to be perfect.

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There's a bunch of adhd advice out there that's like "people with adhd tend to work better under deadlines due to the anxiety so here are ways to artificially induce a stress response in order to get you to get work done" and it's like well what if I don't want to be stressed out all the time in order to function

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If "loving yourself" seems far away, aim for treating yourself with the basic kindness and respect that you aim to treat everyone else with. Or if even that feels unrealistic, aim for not hurting and neglecting yourself. You don't have to move from 1 to 100 all at once. Just start, even if you gotta start slow, even if the journey in front of you is long. It's okay to be a work in progress. We all are, for life.