delulumel
delulumel
𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘢࿎
69 posts
#kpopProbably sleeping
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delulumel ¡ 1 day ago
Text
Dressing room sex? Omg
˗ˏˋ 06. viewer submission challenge ˎˊ˗
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pairingᝰ.ᐟ kim sunoo x reader
warningsᝰ.ᐟ public sex, fingering, oral (f receiving), etc.
natty's notesᝰ.ᐟ mdni, hate comments will be deleted.
statusᝰ.ᐟ 6/9 completed!
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you sat cross-legged on the concrete bench just outside the campus café, the late afternoon sun filtering through the trees overhead, bleeding gold through the shifting leaves. patches of light danced across your notebook, catching in the curve of your wrist and the edge of your page, though you hadn’t written anything in over twenty minutes. the coffee beside you had long gone cold, its once-steaming surface now flat and untouched, condensation pooling against the base of the cup. you didn’t have the appetite for it anymore—your stomach was too twisted, your chest too full. your thoughts tangled around themselves like a spool of thread pulled too tight, looping again and again with no end in sight. beside you, nari tapped her phone rhythmically against her knee, her thumb dragging absently across the edge as she glanced from your face to the passing students with increasing concern. her brow furrowed softly, and after another moment of silence, she gently nudged her knee against yours. “you’ve been quiet,” she murmured, tone cautious. “like… more than usual. talk to me.”
you inhaled, slowly, the kind of breath that sits thick in your lungs for a second too long before it sinks. your gaze dropped to your lap, fingers twitching as they rested against the spine of your closed notebook, and for a second you almost didn’t say anything. but it spilled out anyway. “i think i’m gonna quit soon,” you said, your voice quiet—barely above a whisper. you didn’t look up, but you could feel nari shift beside you, her spine going a little straighter, her lips parting like she wanted to interrupt. but you kept talking. “after three more collabs… that’s it. i think i’m done.” the words tasted bitter, not because they were a lie—but because they were starting to feel like the truth. “it’s just getting to be too much. i thought i could keep everything separate, that i could keep it casual. but it’s not. the way they treat me—heeseung, jay, jake… and now sunghoon—none of it feels casual. they’re so sweet with me. gentle. thoughtful. i can’t stop thinking about them, and it’s not just about the videos anymore.”
your throat felt tight, your heart thudding a little faster as you finally looked up, catching the concerned crease between nari’s brows. she didn’t say anything right away, but her silence was thick—understanding, but heavy. your stomach twisted again. “i didn’t mean for it to get like this,” you whispered. “and now i don’t know how to untangle myself.” your voice cracked on that last word, and you felt your face heat, fingers twitching on your lap. nari didn’t say anything for a long moment, just let the silence sit, let it hold the weight you couldn’t.
finally, nari sighed and shifted closer, her warmth pressing into your side as she rested her head gently on your shoulder. it wasn’t her usual playful nudge or teasing lean—it was soft, weighted, quiet in a way that made your chest ache even more. “you don’t have to beat yourself up over this,” she said, her voice steadier than your own thoughts, wrapping around you like something safe. “you’re allowed to feel things. even if you didn’t plan to.” her fingers slipped around your wrist, holding it with just enough pressure to pull you back to the moment, anchoring you to something other than the storm in your own chest. “it doesn’t make you weak. it doesn’t mean you failed at staying detached. it just means you’re human.” the sincerity in her voice cracked something open in your ribs, a sting of guilt slipping through your spine, because part of you hated how much it helped to hear it out loud. “but if you’re really serious about ending it soon,” she continued, “maybe you should do it in a way that’s yours. not theirs.” you blinked at her, lips parting, and she turned to meet your eyes with a soft smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. “i’m just saying… maybe go out with a bang.”
you let out a dry, broken chuckle, one that barely made it past your lips before it caught in your throat. “what do you mean?” your voice cracked a little, low and hesitant, like you were already bracing for her answer. nari’s eyes lit up with something quieter than mischief, something closer to knowing, and she tilted her head with the kind of look that said she’d been holding this in for a while. “you ever heard of @watchmesunoo?” the name came out casually, but the sound of it sparked something faint behind your ribs, a flicker of something you couldn’t quite place. your brows furrowed as the syllables echoed again, this time deeper, pulling a ghost of a memory forward from the first week you created your account. “wait…” you said slowly, squinting into the space between thoughts. “i think i saw one of his previews when i first signed up… but i don’t think i ever followed him.”
you bit the inside of your cheek, remembering it now—how you’d been scrolling late one night, breath held in your throat as you stumbled across a low-resolution preview with dim lighting and soft groans muffled under ambient music. a shot of his mouth. a blurry pull of fingers against skin. it was simple, intimate, unpolished—something that felt almost too real. “it was just one video,” you added, more to yourself than to her, your voice quieter now. “i forgot about him.” nari nodded, a little too quickly. “yeah. that’s him. barely posts. ignores most collab requests. my friend’s obsessed with him—she’s been trying to work with him for months, but he’s a ghost.” she paused, watching the way your brows pulled together, your expression caught between confusion and intrigue. “but i think you should try.”
she didn’t smile this time—didn’t tease, didn’t nudge. she just looked at you, honest and still, like she already knew what your answer would be before you even thought to say it. “maybe that’s the kind of thing you need right now. someone who doesn’t already have a version of you in their head. someone who hasn’t touched you yet.” her words sank deep into your chest, unsettling something you hadn’t realized you’d been trying to bury. you didn’t say anything for a long moment—just stared down at the screen in your lap, the name @watchmesunoo repeating itself like a soft echo. and slowly, almost reluctantly, you felt the weight of it settle behind your ribs. not fear. not excitement. something quieter.
you swallowed down the last of your hesitation, the corners of your lips twitching with something uncertain as you thumbed at the edge of your phone screen. “i’ll look into it,” you said finally, barely above a whisper, like saying it too loud might make it feel too real. nari’s eyes brightened just a little—not with excitement, but with a quiet kind of pride, like she knew what it meant for you to even consider it. you didn’t say anything else, just offered her a soft, tired smile as you started tucking your notebook back into your bag. your limbs felt heavier than before, thoughts clouded in a swirl of names, usernames, videos, and that echo of a preview you hadn’t realized had stayed with you all this time. “i think i’m gonna head home,” you murmured, slinging the strap over your shoulder and standing slowly, your back arching in a small stretch as the concrete bench faded behind you.
nari stood up too, brushing off her jeans, but before she could gather her things, her phone buzzed and she let out a short groan. “ugh—wait, never mind. i forgot i have to meet with my psych professor,” she said, glancing at the screen with a scrunched nose. “office hour thing. she wants to go over our project proposals.” you turned to her with a sympathetic smile, shifting your bag higher on your shoulder. “good luck,” you teased lightly, nudging her hip with yours. “you’re gonna need it if she’s in her ‘let’s dig into your childhood trauma’ mood.” nari snorted, shaking her head. “don’t remind me.”
you lingered for a second longer, the sun starting to slip behind the buildings in the distance, casting long shadows over the quad. something about the way it all felt—soft, slow, suspended in that hour between day and dusk—made your chest ache again. but you turned anyway, waved her off with a quiet “text me later,” and started the slow walk back to your apartment. and even as you walked, even as your bag thudded softly against your hip and your shoes echoed across the pavement, your mind was already pulling back to that name.
—
your apartment feels colder than usual when you step inside, even though the air’s not on. there’s a stillness in the air that feels too aware of you, like the silence has been waiting to settle over your shoulders the second you’re alone again. you toe off your shoes without thinking, barely aware of the way they hit the floor and skid unevenly to the side, and drift toward your desk like you’re on autopilot. your laptop screen glows faintly in the dimness of your room, casting soft blue across the surface of your desk and reflecting in the half-full cup of tea you’d forgotten to drink this morning. the tab for your assignment is still open — blinking cursor, blank page, waiting for your focus — but you can’t force yourself to look at it for longer than a few seconds. your fingers hover over the keys like muscle memory might kick in and guide you through it, but your brain doesn’t follow. instead, your thoughts splinter in the same direction they’ve been spiraling all day, circling back to that conversation on the bench like it left something in your chest buzzing. something about the name — sunoo — stuck to your skin like static, and the more you try to forget it, the louder it seems to echo.
you can’t explain it, not really. it isn’t the way nari said it or even the weight behind her words — it’s something older, something that scratches faintly at the back of your mind like a memory you hadn’t realized was there. your brows furrow as you lean back in your chair, the room dim around you, your eyes falling unfocused to the wall beyond your desk. and then it hits you — a flash, a flicker, the blurry recollection of scrolling through creator previews when you first joined, when the app still felt like a game you weren’t sure you’d keep playing. you hadn’t even clicked it. you just remembered pausing, breath catching for a second too long, before telling yourself to move on. but now it feels different. now his name feels like a thread you’re meant to tug.
you get up before you can talk yourself out of it. your blanket is soft beneath your legs as you sink into the edge of your bed, pulling your laptop close and setting it in your lap with hesitant fingers. the room is quiet except for the low hum of traffic outside your window, the streetlights casting faint amber streaks across your walls, and still, it feels like you’re not alone. you type the handle slowly, breathing shallow as the letters take shape across your screen. @watchmesunoo — plain and simple. your stomach tightens as you click.
the video you clicked on doesn’t start immediately — it fades in, slow and deliberate, like it’s giving you time to adjust before letting you see all of him. he’s lounging in a dimly lit room, the shadows from warm-toned bulbs playing along the open line of his shirt as he drags his fingers lazily over the inside of his thigh. his eyes are low, unreadable but sharp, and the second he smiles — just the corner of his mouth tugging up — something clenches tight in your chest. “you came looking for me, huh?” he says, voice silky smooth and unbothered, like he was expecting you. “good. i was starting to think i’d have to come find you instead.” your breath stutters. there’s no rush to the way he speaks, no performance, no over-the-top energy. it’s quiet. intimate. like he’s talking just to you — and maybe that’s the point.
your thighs shift without thinking, the video washing over you like a slow wave of heat as his hands move down, drawing soft circles over the fabric between his legs. his voice stays steady, low and measured, as he whispers something about patience — about reward — about how good it feels when someone finally gives in and looks at him properly. he doesn’t touch himself. not yet. he just stares, right into the camera, like he’s watching you squirm on the other side of the screen. and when the video cuts to black, there’s no outro, no goodbye. just silence. and your own ragged breathing as you reach slowly for the message button without really deciding to.
@babydollx0: hey… not sure if you’ll see this. but your content was… really something.
you don’t even have time to look away before the dot appears. he’s typing. and then—
@watchmesunoo: took you long enough
your lips part slightly, surprise hitching in your chest.
@babydollx0: wait… you're actually replying?
the response is almost immediate.
@watchmesunoo: of course. you’re kind of hard to miss, babydoll
your pulse jumps. you reread the message once. then again. your fingers hover over your screen, unsure how to respond to the casual, low-glow confidence laced into every word.
@babydollx0: wasn’t expecting that… guess your reputation’s bigger than mine, huh?
his dot flickers.
@watchmesunoo: maybe. but you’ve got a very dedicated fanbase.
your brows knit. your stomach tightens.
@babydollx0: wait what does that mean—
@watchmesunoo: mall on 11th. 8pm. bring something easy to take off.
you blink. the bubble’s gone. no flirty emoji. no “see you then.” just a time, a place, and the subtle kind of suggestion that leaves your skin warm and your mind racing. you stare at your screen, the cursor blinking back at you like it’s waiting for your next move.
your closet groans softly when you tug it open, the familiar weight of fabric brushing against your fingers like it’s offering you comfort — or distraction. the light above you flickers faintly as you scan the hangers, not really sure what you’re even looking for at first, your thoughts still spinning too fast around his last message. something easy to take off. the words circle your mind like smoke, curling into your chest and warming your skin from the inside out, and you feel your throat go dry as you thumb through the hangers. you don’t want to look like you’re trying too hard — but you do. you want him to look at you the way he looked into that camera. you want to know what it feels like to unravel under his hands, to see if he’s really as smooth and in control as he seems. and somewhere between all those thoughts, your hand stills.
the dress you settle on is one you’d almost forgotten about — soft, slinky, just long enough to be decent and just short enough to feel like a dare. the fabric is pale and silky, a muted ivory that glows a little under the light, and it clings to your frame in a way that feels like a whisper instead of a scream. it dips gently along your collarbones, straps thin enough to feel like they might slip off if someone so much as breathed too close, and the hem flutters just above mid-thigh, catching the breeze from your open window. you hold it up in front of you for a second, tilting your head, imagining the way sunoo’s eyes might track the shape of your waist or the curve of your legs when he sees you. your pulse kicks. the thought makes you shift in place, suddenly aware of your bare skin and how easily he’ll be able to get to it. you dress slowly, letting the fabric slide up over your hips and settle into place, smoothing it down with shaky hands.
your fingers linger at the base of your throat as you glance in the mirror, adjusting your straps, brushing your hair back over your shoulders. there’s something about the way you look tonight — flushed, expectant, a little nervous — that doesn’t feel like the version of you who started all this. but it’s still you. it’s you with want blooming behind your ribs, with something hungry curling low in your belly, with your lips already parted like they’re waiting for him. you swipe on a bit of gloss, mascara, something soft on your cheeks, but nothing too bold — you want him to see you, not a mask. your perfume comes last, spritzed low across your neck, a familiar scent that feels like a secret when it mixes with your skin. your shoes stay flat, easy to walk in — easy to step out of. and when you finally grab your phone, your keys, your tiny bag, your heart flutters as the time reads back at you.
7:44 pm. just enough time to meet him.
just enough time to lose yourself in someone new.
—
the mall was busy, but not loud. the late afternoon foot traffic had thinned into a more leisurely pace, the kind of rhythm that didn’t rush—just drifted, like everything was suspended in this slow, golden lull. soft chatter drifted between the storefronts, punctuated by the low hum of elevator music and the distant whir of a blender from the smoothie kiosk downstairs. perfume hung thick in the air, clinging sweet and floral to your skin as you stepped inside, your heels clicking faintly against the tile. the hem of your dress fluttered around your thighs, brushing soft against your skin with every step you took. you felt… exposed. not because of the dress—it wasn’t too tight, not too short—but because of what today meant. because of who you were here to meet. because of how your body had already begun to anticipate something that hadn’t even happened yet.
sunoo hadn’t told you much. just a time. a place. no expectations, no explanation. and yet your stomach had been tight since you left your apartment, your chest heavier with every passing minute, your head full of him in a way you didn’t have time to prepare for.
you scanned the upper floor slowly, eyes flicking across passing shoppers, half-distracted by the way your pulse thrummed against your collarbone. and then—without warning—a voice broke through the din.
“wow…”
you turned instinctively, heart lurching, and there he was.
sunoo stood several feet away near a decorative planter tucked beside the escalator, partially hidden by the long vines of a seasonal display, but his eyes were locked onto you like he hadn’t even considered looking at anyone else. like the mall disappeared the second you stepped inside. he looked exactly like his preview—his hair a soft blonde, his frame lean, hoodie pulled halfway up his arms—but nothing had prepared you for how he’d make you feel when he looked at you like that. like he was stunned. like your body, your face, your very presence had knocked the breath out of his lungs.
he didn’t say anything for a second. just stared.
and then, finally—“you’re…” his voice trailed off, his jaw flexing, like he was trying to restart the sentence but couldn’t get it out. “you’re so beautiful.”
you felt heat bloom in your cheeks instantly, breath catching in your throat as he stepped forward. his fingers grazed your elbow, light and careful, and his eyes traced the line of your jaw before settling back on your lips.
“you didn’t have to show up lookin’ like that, now i feel underdressed.” you laugh, and he grins wider, the tension between you thinning just a bit. then, with a small wave of his hand, he gestures for you to follow. “c’mon, i wanna talk to you somewhere quieter.”
you trail behind him as he leads you to a tucked-away lounge on the second floor—a cozy seating area framed by tall indoor plants and dim lighting from overhead skylights. it’s quiet, barely anyone passing through, and sunoo slides into one of the plush seats before patting the cushion beside him. once you’re settled, he turns slightly, legs crossed and arm resting casually along the back of the bench behind you. “so,” he starts, voice soft again, but this time with a hint of sincerity. “i’ve seen you before, you know. something about you... stuck with me.”
you tilt your head, surprised, but he just smiles, eyes flicking down to your lips for a second too long before returning to your gaze. “you’re beautiful,” he murmurs, the compliment falling from his lips like a quiet secret. “and not just in that way. you’ve got something about you... makes it hard to look away.” your heart skips, your fingers toying with the hem of your dress as the weight of his words settles in your chest. and then, leaning in just a little closer, he whispers, “let’s make something worth remembering tonight.”
you trail behind him as he pushes open the glass door of the boutique, the soft chime above signaling your entrance, and something tight curls in your stomach at the idea of what’s coming. the place is quiet—minimal music, soft lighting, not too many people—and sunoo doesn’t say much at first, just offers you a sly glance over his shoulder as he leads you down one of the back aisles. “okay,” he murmurs under his breath, just loud enough for you to hear, “so… this one’s for a challenge my viewers sent in. it’s kind of a favorite.” you blink at him, your heart already starting to pound, but he only leans closer, his lips brushing your ear as he speaks. “we’re going to do a few things inside the dressing room. i’ll pick the clothes, you try them on, and then—” his voice drops lower, breathier, “we see how far we can go without getting caught.” your eyes widen slightly, the adrenaline kicking in fast, but you can’t help the heat rising in your chest as he takes your hand and leads you toward the fitting area, his grip warm, steady, and just a little too excited.
he doesn’t give you time to ask questions—only hands you a couple of hangers with a cheeky little tilt of his head, his eyes scanning your expression like he’s enjoying how nervous you suddenly look. “relax,” he murmurs, lips barely parting as he takes a step closer, “you’re in good hands.” the words shouldn’t sound as comforting as they do, but something about the way he says it—light, teasing, and sure—makes you feel strangely safe despite your nerves. the soft click of your heels on the hardwood follows you both as you make your way toward the fitting rooms in the back, the hallway narrow and lined with curtained booths, none of which seem occupied. sunoo pauses at the end of the row and peeks through the curtain before gently tugging it open, motioning for you to go in first with a simple wave of his hand. the room is small—three mirrored walls, a little bench, and a hook for your things—but it’s clean, neat, and quiet. you step inside slowly, nerves buzzing in your chest, but when you turn back to face him, he’s already pulling the curtain closed behind him, one brow arched. “you trust me?” he asks softly. and even though your stomach twists, you nod.
the curtain sways gently behind him before it falls still, sealing the both of you in a small, quiet world muffled by the distant hum of the store beyond—hangers clinking, footsteps fading, the occasional voice dulled by fabric and walls. the dressing room is tight, just enough space to move, to breathe, to feel everything more acutely, and it’s only made smaller by the weight of sunoo’s gaze. he pulls his phone from his pocket without a word at first, the screen lighting his face in a soft glow before he sets it on the small bench beside him, angling it slightly. “no bulky cameras,” he murmurs, his voice light, almost playful, but the look in his eyes is anything but. “figured you’d like that,” he adds, and the way he says it—confident, casual, like he already knows you—makes your cheeks grow warm, a quiet blush spreading up to your ears as you instinctively turn away, facing the mirror to ground yourself. your reflection stares back, wide-eyed and flushed, the soft fabric of your dress fluttering slightly from the chill in the air or maybe the nerves tightening in your chest. you don’t see him move until he’s already behind you, his presence a slow, delicious pressure, his hands settling low on your waist, thumbs grazing your sides like he’s marking the moment. his fingers move with purpose, slipping down to the hem of your dress and lingering there as he leans in, lips brushing the shell of your ear. “you look so beautiful, my god…” he breathes, the awe in his voice sending a tremble down your spine.
his eyes meet yours in the mirror, heavy and hungry, and you can barely hold the intensity of it—how he looks at you like he’s seeing something sacred. the hem of your dress lifts inch by inch beneath his touch, soft fabric peeling away from your thighs, slow enough to make your breath catch. he hums low in his throat, a sound thick with approval when the delicate lace of your panties comes into view, and he leans in even closer, the tip of his nose skimming your shoulder as he exhales against your skin. “fuck…” he mutters under his breath, so quiet it’s almost like he didn’t mean for you to hear it, but the heat behind the word sears into you anyway. he continues to slide the dress upward, over your hips, across your stomach, careful not to rush, not to miss a second of it, like unveiling you is some kind of ritual. the moment stretches, drawn out by his hands and the thrum in your chest and the way your reflection trembles slightly in the mirror. when the dress finally slips past your arms and off completely, his hands glide down your sides again, slow and reverent, as if he’s memorizing every curve now exposed to him. “you’re perfect,” he says simply, like it’s just a fact, and in the quiet closeness of that dressing room, with the heat of his body pressing behind you and your eyes locked in the mirror, you almost believe him.
his hands never leave your skin as the dress falls to the floor, pooling silently at your feet like a forgotten secret. the mirror fogs faintly from the closeness, from the heat building steadily between you, and sunoo’s gaze lingers in the reflection, eyes locked on the curves now bare before him. “they asked for a challenge,” he whispers against your neck, voice warm and teasing, “so i told them i’d deliver.” you shiver as his fingers trail along your hips, gliding forward until his palms rest low on your stomach, holding you there with gentle control, like he doesn’t want you to move unless he says so. “no sounds. no slips. no getting caught,” he murmurs, lips brushing the shell of your ear with each word, sending a rush of goosebumps across your skin. his thumbs stroke slow, measured circles into your lower belly as he watches you melt under his touch, the mirror catching every twitch, every flicker of need that crosses your face. “you can do that, right?” he asks, voice soft but edged with something heavier—something that makes your thighs press together in anticipation. you nod, barely, and he chuckles once, quiet and pleased, before pressing a kiss just beneath your ear, his hands sliding down between your legs with deliberate care.
his fingers skim the front of your panties, featherlight, just enough pressure to make your breath catch, and he watches the way your lips part in the mirror, the way your legs shift instinctively for more. “so sensitive already,” he murmurs, dragging the lace aside slowly, exposing the slick heat between your thighs as he drags two fingers along your folds, collecting the arousal there like he’s savoring it. the air feels heavier now, the muted sounds outside the dressing room fading beneath the pounding of your heart and the wet sound of his fingers teasing your entrance. “stay quiet,” he warns gently, and you nod again, one hand reaching out to steady yourself on the wall while the other clutches at your own thigh, your knees weakening with every stroke. he sinks one finger in, slow and careful, curling it just right as your body arches back into him, your mouth opening on a silent gasp that never quite escapes. the rhythm he builds is steady, teasing—just enough to have you trembling, not enough to let you fall apart—and his breath is warm on your neck as he watches you, utterly transfixed. “fuck, you’re so good like this,” he whispers, lips brushing the edge of your jaw, “like you were made for this.”
his second finger pushes in without warning, stretching you wider, deeper, and your breath stutters as you fight the moan building in your chest, your thighs shaking with restraint. the wet sounds fill the small space, echoing just enough to make it feel dangerous, filthy, like someone might hear if they walked too close to the door. sunoo’s free hand wraps gently around your throat—not tight, just there, grounding you, tilting your head slightly so you can’t look anywhere but the mirror, at the way you’re unraveling in his hands. “eyes on yourself,” he murmurs, voice low and sharp, and you obey, barely holding back a whimper as he fucks you slowly with his fingers, the drag of each curl brushing against that spot that makes your toes curl. his thumb presses to your clit now, circling in slow, wet strokes, and your body jerks in his hold, your hand flying to your mouth to smother the cry that threatens to spill. “shhh, baby, don’t ruin it,” he coos, kissing the back of your shoulder, “not yet.” your eyes blur in the mirror as the first wave builds inside you, hot and heavy, and all you can do is grip his wrist tighter, silently begging him not to stop.
your breath is shallow, lips parting against your palm as you try—fail—to suppress the tremble of your thighs, the full-body shudder that rolls through you each time his fingers thrust a little deeper. you feel soaked, ruined, slick dripping down your thighs in thin trails, and sunoo’s fingers are relentless—patient, but unyielding. he keeps the pressure steady, dragging his fingertips along that spot inside you again and again until your knees nearly buckle, until your toes curl hard enough to ache. the soft, obscene sounds of your cunt being worked fill the cramped dressing room like static, blending with the sharp, wet flicks of his thumb against your clit. he doesn’t speak now, doesn’t have to—not when his mouth is open against your shoulder, his warm breath fanning over your skin with each exhale like he’s barely holding back from devouring you entirely. your free hand scrabbles for purchase, landing uselessly on the mirror as your body jerks again, your chest rising and falling in shallow, desperate bursts.
you can feel it—feel your orgasm winding tight, coiling low in your stomach like a fuse that’s about to blow. and maybe he can feel it too, because his pace slows just slightly, not to tease, but to keep you right on that edge. to draw it out. his hand around your throat squeezes just a little—not choking, but firm enough to anchor you, to remind you who’s guiding your body to this breaking point. “not yet,” he murmurs again, softer this time, like a warning stitched with affection. “you’ll wait until i say.” your nails dig into his wrist, eyes glassy in the mirror, lips trembling as you nod, even though your whole body is screaming to let go. his thumb rolls tighter circles now, fingers curling up perfectly with each pump, and your legs tremble harder beneath you. every movement, every sound, every breath feels amplified in the silence—your arousal making the room feel smaller, hotter, like the walls might cave in if you moan just once too loud.
you whimper again, barely audible, and he hums behind you, his nose brushing against your neck as he slows his fingers just enough to keep you tethered to the moment, your release still just out of reach. “you’re being so good for me,” he whispers, voice honeyed with praise, “i know it hurts to hold it in, baby. but you can do it, can’t you?” you nod again, shakily, blinking fast to stay focused on your reflection—on the way your body trembles under his touch, on how wrecked you look already without even being allowed to finish. sunoo’s smile turns indulgent, one kiss pressed to the corner of your jaw as he resumes his pace, slower now, deeper, like he’s rewarding your obedience with pleasure that teeters just this side of torture. your hips roll down against his hand instinctively, chasing it, chasing friction, chasing the permission you’re still waiting to hear. your clit pulses against the pad of his thumb, swollen and throbbing, and you know you can’t last much longer. but you wait. because he told you to.
and because it’s him—you want to be good for him more than anything else.
you don’t realize you’ve started shaking until his hand steadies you, firm on your waist, the warmth of his palm grounding you even as your body threatens to give out. your forehead presses to the mirror now, damp with sweat, your breath fogging up the glass in uneven bursts. your thighs ache from holding yourself upright, and your clit pulses with every twitch of your hips, your body practically begging for release. he’s still behind you, pressed close, his mouth at your ear and his fingers so deep you swear he’s memorizing every inch of you from the inside out. “just a little longer,” he whispers, voice thick with restraint, but you can hear it—how wrecked he sounds too. how hard he is behind you, cock pressed hot against your ass through his boxers, twitching every time you clench around his fingers. it makes you wetter, needier, your moans hiccuping into little broken gasps that you can’t even muffle anymore. it’s too much. you’re too full. too close.
his thumb rolls over your clit again, tighter this time, firmer, and your whole body jolts, your hand slamming into the mirror for balance. “fuck—sunoo—” his name slips out like a sob, high and breathless, and that’s when he finally gives it to you. “you can let go now,” he says, a low murmur laced with something wicked and warm. “come for me, pretty thing.” and the second the words hit, your body seizes with it—your orgasm crashing over you so hard it knocks the breath from your lungs. your thighs squeeze together instinctively, your back arching, your mouth open in a moan that barely makes it past your tongue as everything inside you contracts at once. you clamp down around his fingers, pulsing and spasming as he fucks you through it, his hand unrelenting, milking every last bit of pleasure until your legs completely give. he holds you up, both hands now wrapped around your waist as you slump against the mirror, whimpering into your arm while your body continues to twitch from the aftershocks.
your reflection is a mess—cheeks flushed, lips kiss-bruised, eyes glassy and unfocused as you pant against the fogged-up glass. your panties hang low around one thigh, the hem of your dress wrinkled up around your ribs, and your skin is covered in sweat and the faint tremble of being completely undone. behind you, sunoo presses one more kiss to your shoulder, then your neck, then just behind your ear. “fuck, you’re perfect,” he breathes, and there’s nothing teasing in his voice anymore—just awe, soft and sincere, like he still can’t believe what he’s seeing. “you did so good, baby. so fucking good for me.” your knees nearly buckle again when he says it like that—when the praise comes without hesitation, when it feels like he means every word with his whole chest.
his hands slide down, one of them reaching between your legs again—not to start anything, but just to feel, to swipe gently through the mess between your thighs like he’s admiring what he caused. “messy girl,” he mutters, smirking now, a kiss dropped to your temple. “hope you didn’t think we were done.” and then he’s lifting you, gently but firmly, turning you in his arms so your back presses to the mirror and your chest rises against his. the phone is still recording in the corner, forgotten but running, capturing every angle, every gasp.
you kiss him before he can say anything else, hard and sudden, like the craving in your chest has finally boiled over and you just can’t hold it in anymore. your lips crash into his with a force that nearly knocks the air from both your lungs, and for a second, he doesn’t move—just stands there in surprise, mouth parted beneath yours—before he groans low in his throat and grabs at your waist like he’s been waiting for it all along. his body meets yours in full again, no space left between you, his chest rising with a shudder as he kisses you back deep and slow and messy. you can taste the leftover sweetness of your own release on his tongue, can feel the urgency building again in the way his hands slide down the curve of your ass, gripping tight, kneading like he’s trying to ground himself in you. your fingers weave into his hair, tugging just enough to make him gasp into your mouth, and you swallow the sound with a whimper of your own as your thighs press together, aching for more.
you barely feel your back hit the mirror—just the cold of it ghosting down your spine as sunoo shifts your bodies again, angling you toward the corner where the bench meets the wall. “you’re not tired?” he murmurs, voice rough with disbelief and hunger, his forehead pressing to yours as he pants. you shake your head, your breath hitching as his fingers skim up your thigh again, finding the damp lace that’s still clinging to you. “not even close,” you whisper, and that’s all he needs to hear.
his mouth drags down your neck, kissing and nipping gently, the pace slower now, more intentional, like he wants to savor the way your body reacts to him. his hands roam again, over your ribs, your hips, the swell of your thighs as you shiver beneath his touch, letting out a soft gasp when his fingers slide past your panties once more. “still so wet for me,” he hums, a smile curling against your skin as he sinks down to his knees between your legs like it’s where he belongs. he kisses along the inside of your thighs, tongue flicking teasingly close before pulling away just enough to make you whine, your fingers curling in his hair.
“stay still for me, baby,” he whispers, and before you can even think to respond, he’s pulling your panties to the side and licking a long, slow stripe up your center.
your knees nearly give out.
his tongue is hot, slick, devastating in its precision as he laps at your clit with soft, rhythmic flicks, then dips lower to fuck into you with long strokes that make your hips jerk forward. you feel it build again so fast—too fast—and you brace yourself on the mirror behind you, one hand still tangled in his hair as he moans against your cunt like he’s starved. “fuck—sunoo,” you breathe out, your voice cracking as your head tips back, the heat in your stomach coiling tighter with every flick of his tongue.
he doesn’t stop. doesn’t let up. he keeps going until your legs are shaking, until you’re gasping and twitching under his mouth, until the words slip out in a messy, broken whisper: “gonna come—fuck, i’m gonna—”
but then he pulls away.
you sob, your body lurching forward at the sudden emptiness, but he’s already standing, already pulling you into another kiss, messy and wet and still tasting like you. “not yet,” he murmurs against your mouth, one hand reaching for his phone to quickly angle it slightly, making sure you’re both still in frame. “you said you weren’t tired, remember?” he grins, voice low and playful now, and you nod desperately, your hands sliding down his chest until they reach his cock, hard and flushed and already leaking against his thigh.
he groans as you touch him, your hand wrapping around his length and stroking him slowly, teasingly. “then fuck me already,” you whisper, voice shaking, and his eyes darken completely.
“turn around,” he tells you, breathless, and you do, pressing your hands against the mirror as you arch your back, offering yourself to him.
he slides in with one deep thrust, both of you gasping at the stretch, the sudden fullness.
“round two,” he pants, thrusting again, slower now. “let’s give them a show.”
his hands find your hips first, steadying you as he sinks in inch by inch, the stretch making you whimper as your palms flatten against the mirror for balance. he hisses behind you, hips stuttering once before he sets a pace, slow and purposeful, every thrust deep and dragging like he’s determined to feel every inch of you again. your reflection catches your eye for a second—cheeks flushed, mouth parted, eyes already glazed—and the sight makes something flutter low in your belly. behind you, sunoo lets out a shaky breath and slides his hand up your spine, flattening it between your shoulder blades until your back arches more for him, the angle sending heat flashing through your core. “fuck, you’re unreal,” he murmurs, his voice a soft rasp that vibrates down your spine as his hips snap forward harder, the sound of your skin meeting echoing faintly in the tiny room. your thighs tremble as he picks up the pace, his other hand moving to your clit again, circling in tight, controlled motions that have your knees buckling. he groans when he feels your body clench around him, a deep sound that shoots straight through you, and your nails scrape softly down the glass as your moans grow louder. “they’re gonna lose their minds watching this,” he breathes out, lips ghosting against your neck, “but they’ll never feel you like this.”
his words hit something deep, and your body trembles beneath him, overwhelmed by the feeling of being so full, so close, so wrecked already—and the way he keeps watching you, eyes flickering between your reflection and the spot where you’re joined. you try to hold on a little longer, but his fingers on your clit work relentlessly, syncing with every hard thrust of his cock until it feels impossible not to break. you whimper his name, breath catching in your throat, and he tilts his hips just right, driving into that spot inside you that makes your whole body jolt forward with a strangled moan. “that’s it,” he whispers, “come on, baby, i feel you—come for me again.” your legs tremble violently as your orgasm crashes over you, your head tipping back with a cry, heat exploding in your belly as you clamp down around him, body pulsing and twitching. sunoo gasps, his rhythm faltering for just a moment before he groans and buries himself deep, hips jerking as he spills inside you, warm and thick and drawn-out. his hands grip your hips so tight you know it’ll bruise, his breath ragged against your neck as he rides it out, murmuring soft curses between gasps. you both stay like that for a moment, bodies pressed together, hearts racing, the air thick with the scent of sweat and sex and something that feels too good to name.
you blink slowly at the mirror, seeing the flush on your chest, the red bite blooming at your shoulder where he’d kissed too hard, and the way his cum begins to trickle slowly down your thighs.
his breath is still shaky when he finally pulls out, cock twitching as he watches the mess they’ve made of each other glisten between your legs. he reaches past you slowly, arm brushing your waist, and taps his phone screen twice to end the recording, the screen dimming to black with a soft click. silence blooms between you both for a second—thick, heavy, and intimate—until he exhales and gently cups your hips, turning you around with soft hands. “you okay?” he whispers, his voice warm, his touch even warmer as he brings one hand up to smooth back your hair, thumb brushing over your cheek. you nod, still catching your breath, and he leans in to kiss your forehead so tenderly it makes your chest ache. he crouches to the floor without a word, grabbing a tissue from his pocket and using it to carefully clean you up, his eyes flicking up every few seconds to make sure you’re not flinching. you feel the gentleness in every stroke, the reverence in every glance, like even now he’s still trying to memorize how soft you are. once he’s done, he helps you slip your panties back on, then pulls the hem of your dress back down, fixing the sleeves on your shoulders with a careful tug.
“you were perfect,” he murmurs, standing again, his hands sliding up to cradle your face as he presses a lingering kiss to your lips—less heated now, more thankful, more full of something you don’t dare name just yet. he doesn’t rush you, just keeps holding your face, his thumbs brushing over your cheeks like he needs to ground you again. your fingers curl around the fabric of his shirt, pulling him just a little closer, and he smiles into the kiss before whispering, “you wanna get out of here?” the way he says it makes your stomach flutter—not dirty, not demanding, just soft, full of care, like he wants to wrap you up in warmth and carry you out of this room. you nod again, and he takes your hand, guiding you slowly out from behind the curtain with a final glance over his shoulder to make sure the coast is clear. the mall noise trickles back in as you step into the hallway, but it all feels muffled—like the world’s gotten quieter just for the two of you. he leans close again as you walk, lips brushing your ear with a tiny smile as he whispers, “you really are dangerous, you know that?”
he turns to you slowly, his gaze flickering across your face like he’s memorizing it again, and then he leans in—his lips brushing yours so tenderly it makes your chest stutter. “i’m fucked,” he whispers, barely louder than the wind, his voice low and quiet and almost like he hates admitting it. “but there’s no way i’m backing down… not when it’s you.”
you don’t answer. you just stare, lips parted, heart slamming too loud in your chest as your brain struggles to catch up—but your body moves before you can think. you tilt forward, pressing your mouth to his with a softness that surprises even you, your hands rising to curl against his chest as he kisses you back like it’s the only thing keeping him grounded. the kiss doesn’t burn—it lingers, aching and slow and full of everything neither of you are ready to say out loud, your breath mingling in the cool night air. and when you pull back, his eyes are still closed, his hands still holding you like he’s afraid you’ll slip through his fingers. you blink up at him, throat tight, but before anything else can be said—before he can speak or you can think—a sharp buzz cuts through the air from your phone in your purse, jarring and urgent. you both go still. the moment teeters at the edge of something bigger. and then your phone buzzes again.
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natty's notesᝰ.ᐟ omggg sunoo my heart >.< honestly didn't proofread this either but i wanted to update this quick for you all, hoped you all enjoyed!
taglistᝰ.ᐟ @starry-eyed-bimbo @vixialuvs @justaquarium @dark-moon-light02 @deobitifull @minjeong28 @wonzzziezzzz @wonsohl @psychicyouthfox @honeyfever @strayy-kidz @bloomiize @tunafishyfishylike @jaehaki @ihearteatingxo @songbyeonkim @sol3chu @mo0neng3ne @strxwbloody @hii01mii @merwdusa @dorrissakurada @lycxee @frequentlykit @heeenha6484 @sjakewrld @stwrlightt @parkjjongswifey @haneulhee @fr34k4c1dr41n @cozyre @vwricky @nyxtwixx @nuggets4lifers @yunkiconico @mynameis-rosie1 @leeknowslefteyebrow @babygguk98 @noiiny @horijiro @nshmrarki @delulumel @brooklyninawhitemustang @baedreamverse @stvrrylove @killedbycharlize @sehyojae @mylettterstoyou @metanoianlove @shaysimpss @kiokantalope @sanriwoozzz @mniwna @l1nn13 @gongyoorit @miszes @ineedheewoninmylife @seonhwastaar @ivyleyun @ari3ll4 @ssanhwatto @negin7 @koizekomi @enhaz1 @kittympirty @slayhaechan @semi-wife @tobiosbbyghorl @hoonsdrnkdzd @shy9-29 @heeenha6484 @heeseungsbm @kristynaaah @smlbch @kirinaa08 @millis-diary @kawaiichu32 @wonislife17 @minniesverse @k1ttyjwon @luvksnn @wondash @wooalt @sweetsoobie @nyxiebabyyy @jakezzgirlz @b1tem4rks @hoonneyyzz @mimimovv @hanjiversee @ch4c0nnenh4 @sarashusbandissunghoonfyime @tnafzi @bbypink @en-hoon02 @skzenhalove @azzy02 @sanchaah @planetmarlowe @miniw0nz @daisy-doo1 @femaholicc @cherryangel-coke @hooniesfvngs @kimsvtaes @mniwna @i-am-not-dal @star-hoon @wafflelyweddedmallow @certifiedjaeyunist @devouredyou @neogotmysam @nuki-riki @heesang07 @littlofang @simj4k3 @makgeolli-jw @ksnooppy @luvksnn @starryemiko @isagistar @nickiminajleftasscheek @jeonkaijoon @doveblackboat @haestuffs @srhnyx @azzy02 @bubblemoonclouds @diana021811 @wonuziex @blubb0 @choicila @nyfwyeonjun @neo-weareone @jooniesbears-blog @byshens @arourababy @dolliewon
708 notes ¡ View notes
delulumel ¡ 7 days ago
Text
I don’t know who to choose anymore😫
˗ˏˋ05. MY EYES ONLY
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pairingᝰ.ᐟ park sunghoon x reader
warningsᝰ.ᐟ public sex, unprotected sex, fingering, etc.
natty's notesᝰ.ᐟ mdni, hate comments will be deleted. (not proofread)
statusᝰ.ᐟ 5/9 completed!
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the room was dim, swallowed in the soft hum of electronics and the faint ticking of the wall clock, the only source of light spilling from sunghoon’s laptop screen. the blue glow stretched across his face, casting sharp shadows beneath his cheekbones and deepening the tired circles under his eyes, but he didn’t seem to notice—or care. his back was hunched slightly, elbows braced on his knees, jaw clenched as his eyes tracked every detail on the screen like he was hunting something. across from him, sunoo sat cross-legged on the couch, a half-finished drink sweating beside him, his phone forgotten in his lap as he stared curiously at the concentrated look on sunghoon’s face. the way he scrolled—slow, deliberate, almost too precise—sent a quiet tension crawling across the room, unspoken but growing heavier by the second. “what’s up with you?” sunoo asked finally, brow lifting as he tried to break whatever trance had settled over him. but sunghoon didn’t blink, didn’t glance up, didn’t even shift. “i have to find who the fuck these idiots are fighting about,” he muttered, voice flat and clipped like he was reciting something he'd already said in his head a hundred times.
sunoo blinked, thrown off by the answer. “who?” he asked, the single word dragging out slightly in confusion as he leaned forward a little. sunghoon inhaled through his nose but never took his eyes off the screen, his fingers clicking and scrolling with rhythmic precision. “jay and heeseung,” he said, quieter this time, like it was a secret he shouldn’t be repeating. “i stopped by a few nights ago… and they dropped the biggest shit ever.” he paused, jaw flexing again. “they’ve both worked with the same girl. collabed with her. and now they’re catching feelings—acting like they’re not, but they are.” the words came out heavier now, more bitter, more laced with something he hadn’t processed yet. “when i asked who it was, they shut down. wouldn’t even give me her username. like they didn’t want anyone else finding her.” he finally leaned back a little, eyes narrowed at the faint trail of usernames and blurred thumbnails in front of him. “so now i’m finding her myself.”
sunoo sat up straighter, his interest finally piqued, a quiet hum leaving his lips as he leaned over to peek at the screen. “you think they’re in love or something?” he asked, half-joking, trying to cut the tension—but sunghoon didn’t laugh. he didn’t even smile. “i think they’re obsessed,” he said instead, cold and steady, his thumb tapping at the trackpad with slow pressure. another scroll. another refresh. then suddenly, the screen shifted, and a thumbnail caught his eye. a soft frame. blurred background. skin in low light.
@babydollxo.
he clicked it before sunoo could even process what he was doing, and the profile loaded with a stuttering hum. there wasn’t much to it—no profile picture, no bio, just two videos stacked neatly under the username. the first one had thousands of views. the second had just been posted within the last hour. “that’s her,” sunghoon said, almost to himself, almost reverent, his voice lowering like he was speaking in church. sunoo tilted his head, brow furrowing as he studied the screen. “how do you know?” he asked—but he didn’t need an answer. because just then, a soft pink glow rippled across the edge of the screen. a gift notification. and another. and another. they rolled in silently, one after the next, usernames sunghoon knew by heart: @heefreakshow. @jayafterhours. and then—surprisingly—@jakeoncam.
sunghoon stared, unmoving, unreadable. not surprised, not shocked, not even angry—just silent. like something deep inside him had clicked into place. like something that had been itching under his skin had finally found a name. sunoo shifted again, lips parting, but the tension was too thick now. it sat heavy in the middle of the room, settling in the hollow between their breaths. “damn…” sunoo whispered, almost out of awe. “she must be something else.” and still, sunghoon said nothing.
and then the page refreshed.
you’d posted another one.
the refresh hit soft—just a faint shift in the page’s layout, the timestamp on your profile jumping forward by a single digit. sunoo blinked first, sitting up straighter as the new thumbnail loaded slowly, a hazy image pulled from a dim-lit angle that showed more of your legs this time. the camera was closer now. more intentional. angled from the foot of the bed, a little lower, aimed just high enough to catch the way your thighs spread, the edge of your fingers pressing into your waistband. sunghoon didn’t speak. didn’t ask if they should watch. he just clicked. the screen flickered once, then dipped into darkness, and your voice bled through the speakers again—quieter than before, softer, more intimate, like you were whispering to someone just out of frame. “missed you,” you said, breathy and wrecked. “wanted to be good tonight.”
sunoo exhaled sharply, but didn’t say anything, and sunghoon’s jaw flexed as he leaned in even closer, pupils blown wide and locked on the way you tugged your panties down your thighs with slow, teasing fingers. the fabric slipped inch by inch, delicate and soft, pooling at your knees as your bare heat pressed to the sheets beneath you, your hips rolling faintly like you couldn’t help it. you were on your back now, the curve of your stomach rising and falling with each breath, your fingers drifting up between your thighs with a kind of practiced slowness that didn’t feel fake—it felt familiar. like someone had already told you how they liked it. like this wasn’t for everyone. the way you moved was purposeful. trained. like you were doing it for someone specific. and that’s when sunghoon’s throat went tight. because he knew it—he fucking knew it. this video wasn’t meant for just them this time.
it was meant for someone new.
your fingers moved slow at first, two of them dragging up through your folds before circling your clit in soft, measured patterns, hips twitching like you were already close. the lighting cast shadows across your skin in gold and pink, and even though your face still wasn’t in the shot, your mouth was—barely in frame, parted with every breath, lips glossy and full as you whimpered something too soft to catch. “do you think about me?” you asked the dark, and sunghoon swallowed hard, tongue pressing to the roof of his mouth. “i think about you… all the time.” sunoo didn’t even move now—frozen beside him, mouth slightly open, locked in the same quiet daze. sunghoon was burning. his chest was tight, his hands tense in his lap, his legs spread wide for balance like he was trying not to fall forward and crawl into the screen. he wanted to know—wanted to know who the fuck you were talking to. wanted to know if it was them.
your moans got higher, shorter, your hand working faster now, legs flexing as your hips rolled against your palm. the camera didn’t shake. the audio didn’t glitch. it was clean, steady, deliberate—every second meant to be watched, replayed, consumed. sunghoon didn’t blink. not once. the jealousy that sat low in his stomach during the first video had cracked wide open now, bleeding into something hotter, meaner, more possessive. they’d seen this before. maybe not this exact video, but they’d seen you like this. they’d had this. heeseung. jay. jake. he thought about their usernames flashing across your gift notifications, about their silence when he asked who you were, about the way they kept your name like a fucking secret.
but now he had you in his hands.
and he wasn’t giving it back.
the video ended in silence, the last frame freezing on the slow rise of your stomach and the soft part of your lips, skin glowing in that muted, bedroom gold. the room felt smaller now, darker, as if the air had thickened with the weight of what they’d just seen. sunoo leaned back slowly, blinking like he’d come out of something heavier than he expected, shoulders sagging with a deep exhale. “well… shit,” he muttered, voice light, but not casual. “i get it now. i mean—i really get it.” his head tilted toward sunghoon, eyes wide with something between awe and disbelief. “not surprised they’re obsessed. honestly, i’d want more too.” sunghoon didn’t respond—not right away. he just sat there, still leaned forward, watching the blank video like it might start on its own again, like it might show him something he missed the first time.
then, after a few long seconds, he finally leaned back, lips curling into a quiet, unreadable smirk as he shut the laptop screen with a soft click. “lock the door when you leave,” he said, voice low and even, already rising to his feet with the laptop tucked under one arm. sunoo raised his brows slightly, caught somewhere between amused and curious, but didn’t argue. sunghoon didn’t wait for a response—he was already halfway down the hall, the soft pad of his footsteps disappearing into the darker part of the apartment. when he reached his room, he closed the door behind him, not slamming it, but with enough finality to feel like a barrier being drawn. and then, slowly, he sat down again. opened the laptop. let the glow wash over his face all over again. your profile filled the screen—only two videos, no bio, no face—and still, it was more than enough. he clicked play.
and this time, he didn’t have to share you with anyone.
sunghoon sat in the center of his bed, back resting against the headboard, legs parted loosely as the soft click of the laptop echoed once in the stillness of his room. the screen flickered back to life, and there you were again—frame perfectly centered, thighs spread, voice barely above a whisper as you circled your fingers against your clit like you were inviting someone to watch you fall apart. he just watched, slowly sinking into the pull of it, his breath growing heavier with every second that passed. his hand slid down to his waistband, not frantic, not greedy—just needing to match the pace of what you were giving him. he palmed himself through the fabric, eyes trained on your trembling legs and the way your back arched with every soft moan you let out. his thumb dragged over the head of his cock, slow, steady, the friction just enough to make him twitch.
his jaw tightened as the video went on, your pace quickening, your free hand gripping the sheets beside you as your breath hitched and your thighs began to shake. you were close—he could see it in the way your hips rolled deeper into your palm and your chest lifted with each ragged gasp. sunghoon stroked himself now, slow and firm, matching your rhythm like it was instinct, his hand slick with precum as he let out a soft curse under his breath. “fuck…” he muttered, eyes never leaving the screen, body tensing as he imagined your mouth wrapped around his name instead. it twisted something low in him—the thought that you had done this before for them, that you had said their names when you came, moaned for them while they watched like kings behind their screens. heeseung. jay. jake. they’d already touched this—already had the pieces of you he was only now learning how to crave. and still… he couldn’t stop. wouldn’t. not until he made sure you belonged to him too.
his strokes grew faster as you cried out softly, fingers fluttering over your clit in the way he knew you had done a hundred times before when no one else was watching. but now he was. and he swore he could feel the tension in your voice when you moaned—like you needed someone to answer it, to fill it. sunghoon’s lips parted, a quiet groan slipping from his throat as he imagined his hands replacing yours, imagined pinning your wrists down while your hips bucked against his, slick and needy and desperate to be claimed. his hips jerked forward into his own fist as you whimpered again, this time louder, and he felt the heat building in his core like a fuse burning down, slow but inevitable. his free hand gripped the bedsheet tight as his back arched slightly, tension coiling through his spine. white streaks painted across his stomach, his hand slowing as he rode it out, and the video ended just as he collapsed back into the pillows.
but he didn’t close the tab.
he just let it replay again.
―
you wake up with the kind of silence that feels still and heavy, like the morning hasn’t quite begun yet—soft light pressing at the edges of your curtains, your blanket twisted loosely around your legs, your throat dry and warm. your phone buzzes once on your nightstand, but you don’t reach for it yet. your limbs are still too heavy with sleep, your body sinking deeper into the mattress as your mind starts to catch up with where you left off. the video. the upload. the way your hands moved over your skin under low light, the camera angle just right, just personal enough to feel like you were whispering into someone’s ear. you didn’t name anyone. you never do. but you knew what you wanted it to feel like—close, unfiltered, like whoever was watching had slipped into your room and caught you in the act of missing them. eventually, you roll onto your side, blanket slipping down your bare hip as you reach for your phone and blink the brightness away. your lock screen is full—messages, follows, gifts—but you ignore most of it. just scroll.
until one username catches your eye.
@hoononrepeat
you hesitate before tapping it, your thumb hovering over the alert, not because you recognize it—but because it’s clean. plain. no emojis, no flirty tag, just a smooth, simple handle and a single notification waiting for you. it’s not a tip. not a comment. it’s a private message. and for some reason, your chest tightens just slightly when you open it. the text is short—two lines, spaced perfectly, no punctuation.
hoononrepeat: you looked so soft like that. i can’t stop watching.
that’s it. no hello, and somehow, it lingers longer than any paragraph you’ve ever been sent. you read it again. and again. and your hand goes still against your chest as you stare at the screen, wondering why this one feels like it was meant for you—not just for your content.
you hesitate before tapping it, your thumb hovering over the alert, not because you recognize it—but because it’s clean. plain. no emojis, no flirty tag, just a smooth, simple handle and a single notification waiting for you. it’s not a tip. not a comment. it’s a private message. and for some reason, your chest tightens just slightly when you open it. the text is short—two lines, spaced perfectly, no punctuation.
is that all you wanted to say?
his reply comes immediately.
hoononrepaet: no hoononrepeat: i want to see you, want to see what more you've got to show.
―
you don’t even bother with a jacket. the air’s still warm and your heart’s already racing, too hot in your chest as you lock your door behind you and start toward the street. you spot him immediately, leaning against the driver’s side door, one foot braced against the pavement like he’s been there for a while, arms folded across his chest as his gaze lifts to meet yours. the moment your eyes connect, his posture shifts—subtle, but there’s something unmistakable in it, like he hadn’t fully believed you’d come out until now. his stare doesn’t drop, doesn’t flicker, doesn’t do any of the things guys usually do when you walk up in person—and it makes the air around you thicken, your nerves prickle with something a little too heavy to be just shyness. “hi,” you say, a little breathless, and it feels stupid immediately because why are you nervous? but he doesn’t laugh, doesn’t even smile big—he just opens the passenger door for you, eyes still locked on your face like he’s memorizing it one blink at a time. “you’re even prettier in person,” he says under his breath, quiet enough that it feels meant for no one but you. you duck your head slightly as you slide into the passenger seat, the scent of leather and something faintly woodsy wrapping around you while he walks around the front and climbs into the driver’s seat like he didn’t just drop a confession between your feet.
he doesn’t start the car right away. for a moment, he just sits there, his hand resting on the gearshift and his eyes roaming your features like they’re trying to trace every shadow and light across your skin. you shift a little in your seat, suddenly hyperaware of how dressed down you are—just jeans, a hoodie, your hair barely styled, and no camera between the two of you this time to hide behind. “i brought stuff,” you say, voice quieter, fingers fidgeting slightly with the zipper of your hoodie. “for the shoot, like outfits and stuff… if you wanted me to change.” but he shakes his head slowly, gaze heavy and unmoving. “no,” he says, lips tilting just barely. “you look perfect like this. soft. real.” the words hit different—warm and strange and intimate in a way you hadn’t expected—and suddenly you’re not sure if you’re here for a video anymore, or something else entirely.
he finally turns the key, the engine humming to life beneath you, low and smooth like everything about him so far. the lights from the dash flicker against his skin, catching the shape of his jaw, the cut of his cheekbone, and you realize he hasn’t looked away once. he pulls off from the curb with a practiced ease, one hand on the wheel, the other resting between the console, fingers tapping out some rhythm only he seems to know. “i know where we should go,” he says after a few moments, his voice low and calm, like you’ve done this before. “somewhere quiet. somewhere just for us.” you nod, swallowing down the lump in your throat, and your eyes stay on the road ahead as he drives you deeper into the kind of night you don’t come back from untouched.
you don’t realize how far you’ve gone until the sound of the city fades behind you, traded for the quiet hum of the tires against worn pavement and the rhythmic crash of distant waves. the roads grow darker the closer you get to the water, the tall brush lining the narrow path catching the headlights and glowing gold for a second before disappearing behind you. neither of you speak much. not because there’s nothing to say, but because everything already feels thick with meaning—like if you speak now, it’ll all spill out too soon. he drives with one hand on the wheel, the other resting on his thigh, fingers drumming against the fabric in a slow, measured beat that somehow keeps time with your heartbeat. occasionally, he glances over at you—quietly, not intrusively, but like he can’t help it—and every time, he looks away with that same small smile that never quite reaches his eyes. you sit curled in the passenger seat, your fingers tracing the hem of your jacket as your eyes dart to the faint outline of the ocean just past the treeline, the sound of it getting louder now. finally, he slows the car, turning down a dirt path, and you realize where you are.
“we’re here,” he says softly, and you nod like you’ve just woken from a trance.
the car rolls to a stop, the tires crunching against gravel, and for a moment, neither of you move. the engine shuts off, leaving only the steady pulse of the ocean and the soft creak of your seatbelt as you unbuckle it. he reaches behind the seat first, pulling out a small tripod and a bag you hadn’t noticed before, slinging it over his shoulder as he steps out of the car. the air hits you first—cool, sharp, salt-soaked—and you wrap your jacket tighter around your frame as you follow him down the barely lit path, the sound of waves pulling louder and louder with each step. the moonlight spills silver across the sand once the trail clears, the entire stretch of beach empty, undisturbed except for the tide. he walks slowly, not too far ahead of you, occasionally looking back to make sure you’re still behind him, and something about the way he waits for you, quietly, makes your chest ache. there’s something intimate in how unhurried he is, how his steps match yours once you reach the soft sand. when he stops, it’s in a small, nestled alcove, half-shadowed by a dune wall, protected just enough to make it feel like the world has shrunk down to just the two of you. he lays down the bag carefully, crouching to pull out a blanket and an extra battery pack, then adjusts the tripod and tests the angle, his fingers working with silent ease.
you stand there for a moment, watching him, heart pounding for reasons you haven’t sorted through yet.
"this is definitely going to be a first for me…” you murmur, your voice soft and slightly shaky as your arms wrap loosely around yourself, your eyes drifting toward the dark stretch of waves behind him. “i’ve never done anything public.” the words feel heavier once they leave your mouth, hanging between you and the ocean air, caught somewhere between nervous excitement and the unknown. he looks up from where he’s crouched in the sand, his fingers twisting something on the base of the tripod, and for a second, the moonlight catches his expression—soft, calm, but unmistakably intrigued. “i’m glad to be the first, then,” he says, his voice low with a subtle edge of teasing confidence, a sly smirk tugging at the corner of his lips as he rises slowly to his full height. his body is close now—too close, the heat of him bleeding into your space as his figure looms above yours, the sharp difference in your heights making you tilt your chin up just to keep his gaze. his eyes don’t wander, not yet; they stay fixed on you with a sort of quiet intensity, like he’s already begun memorizing your features under moonlight. “are you ready to go for it?” he asks, his voice dipping just slightly lower, and the way his tongue darts across his lower lip leaves a shimmer behind that catches the light. your stomach flips as his eyes linger on your face, not impatient, not forceful—just waiting, just watching, like whatever happens next is yours to decide.
you nod slowly, breath caught somewhere between nerves and anticipation, and he catches your hand with such care it almost makes your chest ache—his fingers curling gently around yours like you’re something precious, something fragile, and he guides you down to the blanket he’s laid out across the sand. the moment you sit, you feel the coolness of the fabric beneath your legs, the way the grains of sand shift underneath, grounding you as the breeze tugs lightly at your clothes and the sound of the ocean murmurs just behind you, low and steady. he lowers himself with you, crouching at your feet with a kind of focus that steals the air from your lungs, his hands trailing deliberately along the shape of your calves, then your ankles, then the delicate curve of your heels as he slips your shoes off and sets them to the side like they might interrupt what’s about to happen. his touch lingers longer than necessary, like he doesn’t want to let go just yet, and when his eyes lift again, they don’t just look at you—they study you, flicking between your mouth and your eyes as if he’s already imagining what they’ll look like when you fall apart under him. your hair moves slightly in the wind, a few strands sweeping across your cheek, and he reaches up without thinking, brushing them away with his knuckles before sitting back for a single second—just enough time to press the record button on the camera, the soft mechanical click echoing beneath the hush of the waves. he comes right back to you after that, like he couldn’t bear the space for long, his hand rising to cradle your jaw as he leans in, the warmth of him close enough to make you dizzy before he’s even touched your mouth. and then he kisses you—slowly, deeply, with so much deliberate tenderness that your toes curl into the blanket, his lips soft and searching as he tilts his head just slightly to fit you better, like he’s done this before in a dream. his hand moves to the back of your neck as the kiss deepens, his body shifting closer until his knees brush yours and his breath is all you can taste, all you can feel, all you can want.
his hand slips from the nape of your neck down to your waist, warm and steady as it curves along your side, pulling you gently toward him until your chest presses to his and the kiss shifts—deeper now, hungrier, like he’s been waiting far too long to taste you. the blanket crinkles beneath your knees as he guides you lower, your bodies sinking into the soft give of the sand, your thighs brushing his as he shifts to straddle you, but never once breaking the kiss. you let out a soft breath against his mouth when his hands begin to roam again—one trailing up your back beneath your hoodie, the other brushing the exposed strip of skin above your waistband, like he’s mapping out every part of you he’s about to memorize. the ocean crashes in the distance, closer now, the waves folding over each other in slow, thundering rhythm that somehow mirrors the pace of his hands and the rising flutter in your chest. his lips finally leave yours only to trail down your jaw, then your neck, kissing a path across your pulse like he can feel it jumping under his mouth, like he wants to taste just how nervous and ready you are. you tilt your head to give him more room, your fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt at his back, anchoring yourself to something solid as his mouth moves lower, warm and open and reverent. his hand dips beneath the hem of your hoodie, pushing it slowly upward until the cool night air licks at your skin, goosebumps rising under his touch as he pulls it over your head with careful fingers. his eyes flicker back up to yours then, and he pauses—not because he’s unsure, but because he’s looking at you like you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, his chest rising and falling as he whispers, “fuck… you’re even better in person.”
his fingers curl gently at the hem of your jeans, eyes flickering up to your face before he moves, as if waiting for one final breath of confirmation before he takes what’s already his. you nod faintly, lips parted and chest rising with uneven breaths, and that’s all he needs — his touch dips lower, thumbs pressing lightly into the creases of your hips as he begins to peel the fabric down, inch by inch, dragging it over the swell of your ass with reverence. the night air rushes to greet your newly exposed skin, cool and soft, brushing over your thighs like a phantom touch that makes you shiver, and you swear you feel the sand shift beneath you from the strength of your heartbeat alone. he kneels lower as he pulls them past your knees, his knuckles grazing the inside of your calves with a feather-light touch that makes your toes curl, his eyes never leaving yours as he carefully discards the jeans beside the blanket. he stays there for a second, crouched between your legs with the surf murmuring behind him, and even in the dim glow of moonlight, you can see how tightly his jaw is set, his breath visible when it leaves his lips in soft puffs. his hands trail back up slowly, his palms warm and sure, sliding along your bare thighs like he’s mapping them for the first time, and he exhales a quiet, reverent “fuck” when his thumbs ghost the edge of your underwear. “you’re really letting me see you like this…” he murmurs, almost to himself, and there’s something in his voice—hunger, wonder, something deeper—that makes your heart thud even harder in your chest.
he doesn’t touch you at first. not yet. his hands fall to the hem of his own shirt, his fingers curling into the fabric as his eyes stay locked on yours, like he’s waiting to see if you’ll look away first—but you don’t. you watch him, frozen in place on the blanket, the sound of the waves folding over each other behind you like the earth is holding its breath for what’s coming. the shirt lifts slowly, exposing the soft ridges of his stomach first, pale skin dappled with faint moonlight, the muscles flexing faintly as he pulls the cotton up his chest. he’s not performing, not trying to make it seductive—it just is, naturally, inherently, like the act of undressing in front of you is something sacred and instinctive at the same time. his arms stretch as he tugs it over his head, messing his hair slightly in the process, the tousled strands falling over his forehead once the fabric is tossed aside, forgotten in the sand. he doesn’t speak, doesn’t rush—he just reaches down to the button of his jeans, the sharp pop of it parting sounding louder than it should in the stillness of night. you can feel it in your body before you even understand it—the tightening in your chest, the ache blooming between your thighs, the flicker of anticipation rising like a slow burn. and then he’s lowering the zipper, the metal teeth dragging open with quiet friction, and you swear you could count each inch by the way your breathing staggers.
he pushes them down with a single movement, hips rolling forward just slightly as the denim slides past the curves of his thighs, pooling around his ankles in a wrinkled mess of fabric and heat. the ocean breeze kisses across the bare skin of his torso, but he doesn’t shiver—he just looks at you, like you’re the only warmth he needs, his chest rising and falling with the slow build of something that’s no longer just lust. even in the dim lighting, you can see how hard he is through the thin fabric of his briefs, the outline prominent and unmistakable, straining against the dark cotton with every breath he takes. but he doesn’t move to touch himself—not yet—he just steps out of the jeans and kicks them aside, the hush of the sand shifting beneath his feet grounding the moment in something painfully real. he’s gorgeous in a way that almost hurts to look at, like he was carved to be seen only in moonlight, the lines of his body sharp and soft in all the right places, his collarbones shadowed and neck flushed faintly with color. when he hooks his thumbs beneath the waistband of his underwear, his eyes never leave yours—not even for a second—and it makes your breath catch in your throat with how deliberate it all feels. it isn’t performative, not for the camera, not for a paycheck—it’s intimate, personal, almost reverent, like undressing in front of you is a privilege he doesn’t want to take for granted. and then, slowly, he starts to lower them.
he doesn’t climb on top of you right away—he kneels first, bare knees sinking into the edge of the blanket as his hands settle at either side of your thighs, his breath steady but deeper now, heavier. his eyes sweep over your body with a kind of hunger that’s been aching behind every look since he first saw your face, but now it’s raw, unhidden, his gaze softening only when it lands on your mouth. “come here,” he murmurs, voice low, almost hoarse, and you do—you lean forward instinctively, pulled by something magnetic in the way he’s looking at you. his mouth finds yours before you can say anything, slow and warm, lips molding to yours in a way that feels like he’s been craving it, like he’s imagined it too many times to hold back anymore. the kiss deepens gradually, never rushed, just sinking and sinking until his tongue grazes the seam of your lips and you part them for him without thinking. his hand cups the side of your neck gently, thumb pressing just under your jaw, not tight, just there—reminding you that he’s in no hurry to stop tasting you. you moan faintly against his lips, and that sound makes his hand twitch against your skin, a soft growl curling at the back of his throat. his other hand slides slowly down your waist, tracing the curve of your hip until it dips between your thighs.
his fingertips brush the inner seam of your panties, featherlight at first, just enough to make you shiver as the kiss deepens again—slower now, wetter, your lips parting around his with every sigh that spills between you. the pad of his middle finger presses gently over the damp fabric, circling once, and your breath catches in your throat the second he realizes how soaked you already are. “fuck…” he whispers against your mouth, the word hot and thick with disbelief, like it makes him crazy to know you’re like this for him. he pulls back just enough to look at your face, his thumb still tracing under your chin as his other hand slips beneath the fabric, the waistband stretching just slightly around his wrist. your thighs twitch when he makes contact, his fingertip dragging up your slit slowly, softly, gathering every bit of slick before circling your clit with unhurried pressure. your hips lift in response, a quiet whimper falling from your lips before you can stop it, and he groans quietly as if your reaction alone is enough to undo him. “you’re so fucking soft,” he murmurs, more to himself than to you, his eyes locked on your mouth again like he’s tempted to kiss you until you fall apart in his hands. his fingers slide lower again, dipping into your entrance just barely—just enough to tease—before pulling back to circle your clit again, slow and tender, like he’s learning every inch of you by touch alone.
his hand doesn’t rush. it slips lower with the kind of care that feels rehearsed—not out of boredom, but out of deep, deliberate control, like he’s been thinking about this moment for too long to mess it up now. his fingers skim the waistband of your panties first, not pulling, not yet—just stroking along the edge, like he wants to feel every last barrier before taking it away. his mouth stays on your neck, soft and unrelenting, lips brushing just below your ear as he breathes you in, the pads of his fingers finally curling beneath the thin fabric and grazing over your bare skin. you twitch—just a little—and he notices, because of course he does, and the low chuckle that leaves his throat vibrates against your jaw like it’s meant to settle under your skin. “you’re already so warm,” he murmurs, more to himself than to you, as his hand flattens between your thighs, cupping you fully, letting the heel of his palm press in just the right way. the friction is light—barely there—but it makes you gasp all the same, your legs shifting open without him having to ask. he draws slow, deliberate circles with his middle finger, not dipping in yet, just tracing over your clit like it’s his to learn, his to memorize, his to keep. your body starts to respond without thought, hips rolling into his touch, breaths coming in little stutters every time he drags his fingertip in tighter, more focused motions.
his kisses grow slower the more your body reacts, like he’s savoring each moan he pulls from your throat, like they’re all proof that you want this just as much as he does. he presses a kiss beneath your jaw, then trails down again, lips brushing your collarbone, soft and open-mouthed, like he’s marking a path only he’s allowed to follow. his free hand comes up to slide beneath your bra, thumb brushing your nipple with practiced ease as the other hand stays between your legs, his fingers never stopping, never breaking the rhythm he’s set. the ocean is a distant sound now, replaced by the soft rush of your breath and the quiet slick noise of his touch working you open. “you feel that?” he whispers, teeth grazing your skin just enough to make your stomach flutter. “you’re so fucking wet already…” your moan is breathless, not quite a plea, but it makes his jaw flex anyway, like he’s holding himself back, like if he doesn’t pace himself, he’ll lose it. his fingers slide lower for just a second, parting your folds to gather more of your arousal before circling back up to your clit, slick now, gliding smoother, deeper, more precise.
his touch builds pressure in waves—gentle, controlled, then a little firmer when you roll your hips just right, when your body pulses against his palm like it’s begging for more. he watches your face the whole time, eyes sharp and dark, soaking in every twitch of your brows, every soft drop of your lips, like he’s collecting your reactions to keep for later. your thighs tremble, and he moves with it, adjusting his angle so his finger presses a little tighter, a little faster, like he knows exactly what you need without having to be told. his lips find your shoulder, then the base of your throat again, his voice low and thick when he speaks next. “don’t hold back, baby,” he whispers, lips brushing your ear. “let me hear how good it feels.” his words shoot straight through you, and you do—you let your moan slip out freely this time, soft and high, your chest arching into him as his fingers work tighter, faster, pushing you closer to the edge. he’s not even inside yet and still, you feel like you’re going to break, like his touch alone could ruin you if he doesn’t stop—or if he doesn’t give you more.
his hand shifts, just enough to change the rhythm, his fingertips pausing at your entrance like he’s waiting for you to twitch, to gasp, to show him just how ready you are. and when you do—when your breath hitches and your hips shift forward just slightly—he rewards you with a slow, gentle push, slipping one finger inside you with a smooth ease that makes your entire body go still for a second. the stretch is light but firm, deliberate, like he’s testing the way you open for him, the way you take him in. his breath fans across your cheek as he presses in to the knuckle, and you swear you feel him smile just barely against your skin, his lips grazing your jaw like he’s proud. your walls clench around the intrusion and he groans quietly in response, a low sound that makes your thighs twitch where they’re spread in the sand, your back arched slightly into the curve of his chest. his finger curls slowly, just once, then again, dragging along the front wall with precision that feels far too confident for a first time. “so tight…” he murmurs, almost reverent, his eyes locked on the way your lips part and your lashes flutter shut. “so fucking good, baby.”
he doesn’t rush the second finger—not yet. instead, he draws the first one out nearly all the way before sliding it back in, slow and deep, letting the motion settle into something you can’t help but grind down into. his thumb never strays far from your clit, brushing it just enough to keep you gasping softly, to keep your body trembling as he sets the pace. the ocean behind you is nothing more than a backdrop now, white noise to the heavy rhythm of your breath and the quiet squelch of his finger gliding in and out of you, slick and steady. your hands clutch the blanket beneath you, fingers curling into the fabric, desperate to ground yourself as he keeps you hovering, not too fast, not too much—just enough to make your thighs ache. he leans in closer, lips brushing your ear again as he adds the second finger with the same slow care, easing it in beside the first and pausing once it’s buried to the base. “you’re taking me so well,” he breathes, voice low and full of awe. “fuck, you feel even better than i imagined.”
the stretch is fuller now, his two fingers working you open in slow, deliberate pumps that have your chest rising and falling in uneven gasps, your hips rocking down against his hand in search of more pressure. you feel full but not overwhelmed, the friction deep and purposeful, his fingers curling inside you with each thrust to press against the spot that makes your knees twitch. your mouth falls open as he picks up the pace, just slightly, his thumb pressing tighter against your clit now, circling in tandem with the rhythm of his thrusts. every movement is fluid, synced, like he’s orchestrating your body without ever taking his eyes off you. “you’re doing so good for me,” he whispers, lips brushing your temple now as his other hand cradles your jaw to guide your face toward his. “look at me, baby. i want to see you fall apart.” your eyes flutter open, hazy and glassy, and his expression darkens the moment you meet his gaze—like he’s feeding off your pleasure, like it’s pulling something out of him too.
his fingers push deeper, firmer now, each thrust met with the sound of your arousal slicking down his hand, your legs trembling against the blanket as you start to clench harder around him. the moans slipping from your lips are higher now, breathier, no longer controlled, and his lips find yours in the middle of one—swallowing the sound like he needs to feel every second of it. the kiss is slow at first, just like everything else, but it deepens fast, your mouths open and hungry, tongues brushing in time with his thrusts. the hand on your jaw keeps you close, keeps you steady, while the other works your cunt with dizzying precision, two fingers stroking inside you like they were made for it. every roll of your hips brings a low grunt from his throat, and you feel the tension building deep in your core now, coiling tighter with every passing second. “you’re gonna cum for me like this, yeah?” he murmurs between kisses, his voice hot and rough against your lips. “fuck—i want to feel it. want to see how pretty you look when you fall apart.”
your body’s already answering before your mouth can—hips stuttering, thighs trembling, breath catching in your throat as your walls begin to flutter around his fingers. his thrusts don’t stop, don’t slow, but his thumb presses harder now, circling fast and tight over your clit, dragging you toward the edge with no mercy. your moans pitch higher, breathier, as your body bucks forward, helpless against the wave building inside you. “that’s it, baby,” he whispers, mouth at your jaw again, pressing kisses between his words. “just like that… fuck, you’re so perfect.” the tension finally snaps, heat exploding low in your belly and rushing through your limbs as you cum hard on his fingers, your back arching and your mouth falling open on a sharp cry that gets lost in the crash of the waves nearby. he keeps moving through it, working you down slowly, his pace easing as you shake and gasp and grip his wrist like you need something to hold on to. your skin is flushed, your hair wild, your chest heaving as your thighs twitch with aftershocks.
you’re still reeling, breath stuttering in your throat and thighs trembling from the aftershocks, when he pulls his fingers from you with a slow, deliberate drag. they glisten in the faint moonlight, slick with your release, but he doesn’t even glance at them—his eyes are on you, completely locked in, like he can’t look away even if he tried. his chest rises and falls with a heavy rhythm, and you feel the heat from his bare skin as he leans in closer, the muscles of his stomach flexing with each breath. you barely notice the shift in his hands until he reaches past you, fingers brushing the tripod beside the blanket—still rolling, still catching everything. but he doesn’t hesitate. doesn’t even think twice. “fuck this shit,” he mutters, voice hoarse and low, as he taps the button to end the recording, the red light fading instantly as he tosses the remote into the sand like it means nothing. and then he’s on you again—no more angles, no more planning, just his lips crashing into yours like he needs you more than air.
the kiss is messy, deeper now, tinged with the urgency that’s been simmering beneath his skin all night, and you can feel the way his body trembles when your fingers slide down his sides. his hands roam with less restraint now, no longer careful or tentative but hungry, dragging up your thighs, over your hips, gripping the sides of your waist like he needs to anchor himself before he sinks too far into you. your name slips from his mouth between kisses, ragged and breathless, as he guides you back into the sand, the blanket doing little to cushion the heat of his body on yours. every movement is rougher now, more instinctive—the way his mouth latches onto your neck, the way his hips grind against yours like he’s already buried inside you. he settles between your legs with practiced ease, the tip of his cock dragging through your slick folds, catching at your entrance but never pushing in just yet, just teasing. “look at me,” he says suddenly, voice low but clear, his palm flattening over your cheek as he holds your gaze. “don’t look away, baby. not tonight.”
he pushes in slow, all at once, the stretch thick and satisfying, and your mouth drops open on a gasp as your body tenses beneath him. his groan is guttural—deep, broken—his forehead pressing to yours as he bottoms out, hips snug against yours, like he’s finally found something he didn’t know he was missing. he doesn’t move for a second, just stays there, buried inside you and breathing like he’s just run a marathon, his hands gripping your hips so tightly you can feel the tremble in his fingers. “fuck… fuck, you feel too good,” he whispers, almost in disbelief, like your body wrapping around him is something he can’t quite believe is real. his cock twitches inside you as you clench, your legs tightening around his waist, trying to pull him deeper, closer, like your body already knows how to beg for more. and when he finally starts to move, it’s slow, deep thrusts that drag every inch of him along your walls with unbearable friction, like he’s trying to memorize the way you feel. “this… this is better,” he breathes, mouth ghosting over your jaw, “better than anything we could’ve filmed.”
his rhythm stays steady at first—measured, deliberate—but the tension in his body starts to crack with each roll of your hips against his, and soon his pace turns rougher, more desperate. his hands splay across your thighs, holding you open as he fucks into you harder, his pelvis grinding against your clit with every thrust until you’re arching into him, gasping for air. the sand clings to your skin, sticking to the sheen of sweat along your back, but you can’t feel anything except him—his breath in your ear, the slap of skin against skin, the guttural sound of your name as he groans it like a confession. “you don’t get it,” he pants, voice cracking around the edges, “you’ve got them all wrapped around your finger—but this… this is mine.” and he means it—not with jealousy, but with something sharper, something closer to worship, like having you under him like this is a prize no one else deserves. your hands dig into his shoulders, nails leaving crescent marks behind as your next moan breaks apart in his mouth, and he kisses you through it, lips bruising against yours with every thrust.
his hand slides up your waist without slowing down, fingers pressing possessively into your skin as he lifts your hips just slightly—angling you in a way that has your breath hitching hard in your throat the moment he thrusts again. the new position lets him reach deeper, hit harder, and he feels the way you clench around him with every movement. your thighs tremble around his waist, barely able to keep your hold as your body starts to unravel beneath him, but you don’t dare let go. his mouth finds your jaw, then the sensitive spot beneath your ear, teeth grazing over the salt-slick skin before biting down just enough to make you cry out. the sound you make goes straight to his head, and he moans into your neck—low, rough, almost pained. “say it,” he rasps, his voice jagged and wrecked, the rhythm of his thrusts growing harsher, more erratic. “tell me it’s mine.”
you nod before you even realize it, head falling back against the blanket beneath you, hips arching up to meet his with helpless desperation. but it’s not enough. he stops. he’s buried deep inside you, cock pulsing, but he doesn’t move—his palm comes up, fingers curling tight under your jaw to force your gaze back to his. your heart stutters in your chest at the look in his eyes—dark, wild, possessive in a way that makes your thighs squeeze tighter around him, like your body already knows it belongs to him. “say it,” he growls again, this time softer, like he’s pleading even as he commands. “say no one else gets you like this. say it’s only me who gets to feel you. see you. fuck you.”
“it’s yours,” you whisper, voice cracking, lips trembling beneath his. your throat feels raw from moaning, from gasping, from the burn of everything he’s pulling out of you—but you say it again anyway, louder this time, firmer. “it’s all yours—fuck, only you. only you.” the second you speak the words, he exhales like they’re the only thing holding him together, and then he’s moving again—thrusting back into you so hard you feel it in your teeth, in your spine, in the way your body curls up into him like you can’t bear a second of distance.
the sound of your skin slapping together echoes in the cool night, and your moans fall out of you with each thrust, getting louder, messier, as you near the edge. his weight presses you down, burying you into the blanket beneath, into the sand, and it feels like you’re being claimed. he kisses you like he’s starving, mouth devouring yours, his tongue tangling with yours as his hips roll with purpose—grinding against your clit every time he bottoms out until your back arches off the ground and your whole body trembles beneath him.
you come so hard you forget to breathe. your legs lock around him, your nails dig into his back, and you cry out his name like it’s the only word you remember. the pleasure blinds you, rips through your core and steals every thought until all you can feel is him—his cock still driving into you, his name groaned into your mouth, his hands holding you down like you’ll disappear if he lets go.
he follows right after, hips jerking as he moans your name like it’s sacred, like it hurts to say. he spills inside you with a shudder, his body trembling above yours, forehead pressed to yours, breath mingling in the heavy heat between you.
but then his hand slides down, slow and deliberate, palm dragging across your thigh like he’s still hungry. his cock twitches inside you, not softening, and when he lifts his head to look at you again, there’s something dangerous behind his eyes—something greedy, aching, barely satisfied.
“not done,” he whispers, almost apologetic. “can’t be done. not when you feel like this.”
before you can speak, he’s moving again—rolling his hips into yours with slow, deep thrusts that make your breath hitch all over again. you’re still sensitive, your body still fluttering from the last high, and it makes every drag of his cock feel too good, too much, too soon. your fingers curl into the back of his neck, your back arching without your permission as he begins to build a rhythm, slower this time, more focused.
“you drive me fucking insane,” he murmurs against your neck, kissing the spot just below your ear, biting down softly when you gasp. “look at you—already trembling for me, still soaking wet, still so fucking perfect.”
he pulls almost all the way out just to watch your face, then slides back in with a groan that has his eyes fluttering shut, like your body is the one place he can breathe. every thrust is drawn out, measured and deep, making you whimper as the oversensitivity turns into something more potent—something sharper, hotter, harder to hold back.
his hand slides under your thigh again, lifting it higher around his waist, and the angle has you gasping, your nails dragging down his back. “gonna fuck you again just like this,” he pants, voice fraying at the edges, “right here, right now—until you forget anyone else even exists.”
his thrusts fall into a rhythm again, slower but deeper, more possessive now, like he’s not just fucking you—he’s reminding you. of who he is, of what you just gave him, of the way your body fits around his like it was made to. each stroke pulls a breath from your chest, a broken sound from your throat, and he swallows them one by one with kisses that land messy and hot against your jaw, your mouth, your throat.
you’re already too sensitive—every movement lights you up, makes your legs tremble and your hands scrabble for something to hold on to. he doesn’t let you run. one of his arms hooks under your lower back and lifts your hips, keeping you locked against him as he drives into you, over and over, deeper, harder, more sure. his body is heavy against yours but it feels grounding, anchoring, like he’s the only thing holding you to this earth.
“you feel that?” he breathes against your lips, his voice hoarse and wrecked, and you nod helplessly, nails biting into his skin. “feel how good you take me? how perfect you fuckin’ take me?” his hand snakes up between you, fingers pressing down on your clit with just enough pressure to make your whole body jolt. your hips buck, and he groans like you’re killing him, mouth crashing into yours in a kiss that’s more teeth than lips, more desperation than control.
you’re close again—too close—and the way he keeps grinding into you with that thick, unrelenting rhythm, the way his hand doesn’t stop moving, it’s like he knows exactly how to pull you apart. “come for me,” he says, voice shaking. “let me hear how good i fuck you.”
you do. you can’t stop it even if you tried. your second orgasm crashes over you like a tidal wave, ripping a scream from your chest as your body seizes around him, back arching, mouth falling open. your vision blurs with stars that have nothing to do with the sky. your pussy clenches tight around him, pulsing hard with every throb of pleasure as he fucks you through it, chasing his own high like a man possessed.
his name falls from your lips over and over—no control, no shame, just pure need.
he cums again with a growl, hips slamming into you one last time as he spills inside you all over again, the heat of it spilling out between your thighs. his head drops to your shoulder as he groans your name like he’s praying, like he’s begging, like he’s offering you something he doesn’t even know how to put into words.
you’re both still gasping for breath, tangled together in the heat of the aftermath, his body heavy against yours as the waves continue to whisper nearby. your chest rises and falls beneath him, heart racing, your skin dewy with sweat and speckled with grains of sand that cling stubbornly to every curve. for a moment, neither of you speaks—just the quiet hum of the ocean and the way his hand lazily traces up and down your side, smoothing over your ribs like he can’t stop touching you.
“you okay?” he finally murmurs, voice husky and low, warm against your cheek as he nuzzles closer. you nod, eyes still fluttered half shut, and you feel the smile that curls against your skin when he presses a kiss there. he doesn’t rush. his hand glides down, then hooks behind your knee, and before you can react, he’s lifting you up—effortless, like your weight means nothing in his arms.
you let out a soft squeal, wrapping your arms around his neck as he stands with you pressed against his chest, still completely bare, still glowing with the flush of what just happened. “what are you doing?” you laugh, your voice breathless and high, but it makes him grin even wider. “washing off the prettiest girl,” he teases, eyes sparkling as he starts walking toward the shoreline, feet sinking into the sand with every step. “can’t have you all sticky and messy, can i?”
you hide your face in his shoulder, body warm from both the afterglow and his touch, and you feel the rumble of his soft chuckle beneath your cheek. he wades into the water with you held tight, only stopping once the waves are lapping at his waist. the ocean is cooler than the air, and it makes you shiver when it first hits your skin, but he holds you tighter, anchoring you against him like a human heater. one arm stays under your thighs while the other curves behind your back, fingertips gliding in slow circles.
he dips you down a little, just enough for the water to kiss your shoulders, and then lifts you again, like he’s cradling something precious. you meet his eyes, and they’re so soft now—nothing like the fire from earlier, just quiet awe, like he can’t believe you’re real. he leans in to kiss your cheek, then your jaw, then your neck—so many kisses, each one slower than the last, lingering, lips wet and warm from the sea. “you’re perfect,” he mumbles between them, words brushing your skin like poetry, “so fucking perfect.”
you’re not even sure what to say. your fingers twist in the hair at the back of his neck as your heart thumps hard again, but for a different reason this time. this isn't lust—it’s tenderness, intimacy, something that makes your chest feel too small to hold it all. he keeps kissing you like he’s trying to memorize every part of your face, even as the water laps at your skin and the stars glitter quietly above.
“stay right here with me,” he whispers, voice carried by the breeze. and you do—you melt into him, let the tide sway around your bodies as he holds you like you’re the most important thing he’s ever touched.
you let him hold you, let yourself rest your cheek against his shoulder while the tide rocks around you like a lullaby, and for a while, it feels easy. his breath is warm on your skin, and his arms stay wrapped tight around your waist like he’s scared the ocean might steal you away. the kisses don’t stop—soft little presses against your neck, your temple, the curve of your shoulder—and he’s humming something under his breath now, barely audible but comforting all the same.
it’s sweet. too sweet. dangerously sweet.
you blink up at the stars, jaw tightening as the weight of it all starts to sink in—the way he’s looking at you, the way your body fits into his, the way your heart is beating a little too fast, too full, and none of this was supposed to feel like this. not here. not now.
he says something again, something playful and light about how you look good in the moonlight, but it barely registers. your throat tightens. you laugh, but it’s thin. and when he leans in again, you shift your head away just slightly, not enough to be obvious—but enough to breathe, to remind yourself this isn’t forever.
what the fuck is wrong with you?
you were supposed to have fun. that was the plan—go in, enjoy it, play the game, collect your wins, keep your heart locked behind your teeth. and yet here you are, getting carried into the sea like a scene from a dream you were never meant to be in. you’re getting too soft. too attached. and not just to him.
your stomach twists as the reality lands hard: this is just one night. one boy. one body. but your soul keeps making it something more, and if you’re not careful, you’ll end up falling for all of them.
your eyes flutter shut. you force a smile back on your lips and nestle into his shoulder like nothing’s changed. like your whole chest isn’t aching.
three more. that’s what you tell yourself. just three more times. and then you're done.
but even as you say it, you know you’re lying. and worse—you don’t know who you're lying to more.
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natty's notesᝰ.ᐟ hey…hey….>.< okayyyy not as long as my other ones but don’t you worry, next chapter will be !!
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delulumel ¡ 22 days ago
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P: Ghostface!Heeseung X Fem!Reader (Recommended age 18+)
Warnings: Stalking, Obsession, Possessive Behavior, Murder, Violence, Knife Use, Manipulation, Noncon/ Dubcon, Suggestive Content, Mental Instability (hes insane but in love), Yandere Undertones, Voice Kink, Choking, Light Manhandling, Voyeuristic Tones, Degradation, Dark Themes, Chasing, Forced Proximity, Implied Torture
Synopsis: Heeseung’s spent years loving you from the sidelines, silently watching you give your heart to the wrong people. Now, as Ghostface, he’s done waiting. He’ll tear your world apart, piece by piece until the only place left to run is straight into his arms.
Wordcount: 19k
a/n: After disowning my previous Ghostface!Heeseung fic, I am ready for a do-over :D
now playing: do i wanna know by arctic monkeys | i was never there by the weeknd
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You never had much luck with people.
Whether it was fate, bad timing, or some cruel curse stitched into your skin at birth, you never met someone who stayed. No one who let you cry on their shoulder without expecting something in return. No one who hugged you just because they noticed you needed it, even when you didn’t say a word. No one who remembered the little things, like the way you only like white lilies in the spring, or that you always hum when you're nervous.
You were always too much, or not enough. Too quiet, too distant, too soft around the edges for people who only wanted you when it was convenient. If you were unlucky with friends, you were a full-blown disaster when it came to love. Your exes left faster than they said I love you, and those words never felt real anyway. They only knew the version of you that smiled at dinner and made polite conversation. None of them stayed long enough to learn how you took your coffee or what your silences meant.
None of them really saw you. And the ones who claimed they did turned out to be liars in the end—liars, cheaters, or something worse.
And even if you told yourself every time that the next one would be different—someone better, someone kind—you’d hold onto that hope like it was gospel. You told yourself you’d find someone who would treat you like a flower, or at the very least, like a person with a heart. With dignity. But you never did. What you always found instead were the bottom-feeders—the emotionally vacant, the cruel, the ones who looked at your softness like it was a challenge to break. They’d call you dramatic for crying, clingy for needing affection, a burden for simply wanting to be heard. Some of them didn’t even bother pretending. They treated you like an inconvenience, a piece of gum stuck to their shoe, something to be scraped off and discarded the second it lost flavor.
And the ones who came back… They never came back out of guilt. Or love. They came back when they needed something. When they were bored. When they missed the feeling of being wanted and knew you’d still answer. Some just came back to watch you break again just to see if they still could.
Still, you held onto that hope. That slim, flickering chance that maybe, just maybe, you’d find someone who would choose you every time. Someone who wouldn’t make you beg to be seen. Someone who’d put your needs first—not when it was convenient, not when it made them feel powerful but simply because they wanted to see you happy. Someone who would hold you while you cried and swear they'd never let the world touch you like that again. Someone who would burn everything down just to stop your pain.
And maybe that was your biggest mistake. Because if only you had realized that someone had already been there. Right under your nose. Watching. Waiting. Loving you so much it made him sick. So much that he couldn’t stand the way others touched you. So much that he had to make it stop.
Because Heeseung had been patient. Painfully, cruelly patient. He watched from the sidelines with clenched fists and a twisted heart, swallowing the urge to act every time you smiled at someone who didn’t deserve it. Every time you cried over a person who wouldn't even notice if you disappeared. He told himself he had no right to intervene. He wasn't your boyfriend. He wasn’t really your friend either, just the guy who hovered near, talked when you let him, looked away before his gaze gave too much away. He didn’t feel like he deserved you. He never had.
That’s why he stayed quiet. Why he didn’t reach for you, didn’t touch, didn’t confess. Because if he let himself have just one taste of what it would be like to call you his… He knew he wouldn’t be able to stop. He knew it would break him. But you were always kind to him. Gentle. You didn’t know how much that alone unraveled him, thread by thread. You spoke to him like he mattered. Looked at him like he wasn’t just Lee Heeseung. You smiled. You gave him hope. And that hope festered. Grew teeth. So when he saw them hurting you—again, and again, and again. He snapped, because if no one could love you right, then he would make sure no one else ever got the chance.
His breaking point was simple.
You were seeing a guy. Not the worst you'd ever dated, but not the kind of man who looked at you like you were everything either. Heeseung had tried to stomach it—biting down on jealousy so hard it tasted like iron, pretending not to notice how fake the guy's smiles were, how his hand always lingered too low on your back.
And then you found out. He’d been cheating. Not just once. Not just with one girl. Multiple women. Meaningless flings. You’d heard it from someone else first, then saw the proof with your own eyes. And it shattered you.
Heeseung watched from across the courtyard that day—watched the way your expression crumbled while you stared down at your phone, watched the way you left early, head low, arms wrapped around yourself like you were trying to hold in all the pieces. And he didn’t move. Not at first. He just sat there on the bench, watching you walk away with that broken look on your face, like your chest had been cracked open and all the softness inside was spilling out. He could feel your pain like it was his own.
He’d seen you hurt before. But never like this. And maybe it was selfish, but something in him broke too. Because no matter how close he was, how many smiles you’d given him, how many conversations you’d shared in passing. He still wasn’t the one you ran to. You didn’t even know he was there.
Heeseung sat there long after you disappeared, hands in his lap, fists clenched so tightly his nails dug into his palms. His heart was racing, his breathing uneven, something cold and sharp blooming in his chest like frostbite. He didn’t go to class that day. He followed your boyfriend instead. Just watched. At first. Watched him flirt with other girls like nothing happened. Watched him text while walking, probably lining up his next lie, his next hook-up. He watched until his vision blurred with fury.
Because how could someone treat you like that? How could anyone look at you and not realize how fucking lucky they were? You deserved someone who would memorize the way you liked your tea. Someone who’d know when you were overwhelmed just by the way your shoulders tensed. Someone who would never, ever make you feel like you were easy to leave.
And if no one else could give that to you... Then Heeseung would carve out a place for you himself. But first… He needed to rid the world of the scumbags who hurt you. He needed to make them disappear. And he knew exactly how to do that.
The moment the chains around him snapped, so did his restraint. And with it, his sanity. He had spent years studying you, memorizing your habits, your smiles, the little shifts in your mood when something wasn’t right. But he’d also studied them. The ones who broke your heart. The ones who made you feel like nothing. The ones who looked at your kindness and mistook it for weakness.
He remembered names. Faces. Addresses. It was almost too easy. Tracking them down was like finishing a puzzle he’d been piecing together in his mind for years. And once he found them, once they were alone… He gave them no mercy. Not an ounce of it. Not when he cornered your ex behind that bar where he always flirted with anything that breathed. Not when he followed the girl who spread those rumors about you in high school into the dark parking lot after her shift. Not when he faced the ones who laughed at your tears, who used you and tossed you aside like you were disposable.
They all begged. They all screamed. And he watched—expression calm—as they writhed beneath him, as the light bled from their eyes, as their bodies twitched and stilled, and finally… stopped. He watched them take their last breath with his knife buried deep, his gloved hands covered in everything that made them human. They were monsters, all of them. And monsters deserved to die.
He didn’t regret it. Not a single one. Because every time he plunged the blade in, he thought of you. Of your tears. Of your voice cracking when you tried to laugh through the pain. Of how small you looked when you thought no one was watching. And now… you’d never have to suffer because of them again. Now, he was cleaning the slate. One body at a time. And when it was over—when the world was quiet, and every hand that ever touched you wrong was rotting in the dirt— then, finally, he’d come for you.
Not to hurt you. But to give you the love no one else ever could.
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Watching the news on a rainy evening about the latest murder had started to feel… routine. You sat on the couch, legs curled under you, fingers cold around the steaming mug you’d forgotten to drink from.
Another body found late last night... police have yet to connect the murders, though the brutality and frequency are causing rising panic across the city...
This was the fourth murder in the last 48 hours. That alone was terrifying. Unusual, sure. But it was more than just the numbers that started to bother you. What made your stomach twist with something colder than fear was that… you knew them. All of them.
Every single victim was someone who had wronged you. An ex. A former classmate. Someone who’d said something cruel behind your back. Someone who’d touched you without asking. At first, it had been easy to brush off. A coincidence. Maybe your mind just latched onto familiar names, making patterns where there were none. But now?
You stared at the screen as the reporter listed off graphic details from the latest crime scene—the wounds, the lack of mercy, the chaos and something inside you started to go very, very still. You weren’t listening anymore. You were somewhere else. The room faded out, replaced by memories. Faces. Conversations. Fights. That one night you cried in your car after another argument. The time you flinched when someone raised their voice. All those moments when someone should’ve protected you and no one did. And now they were gone. Your chest tightened. Not with grief. But confusion. Dread.
You blinked. Realized the rain tapping against the window had grown louder. Realized the room was dark except for the flicker of the television. Then your phone buzzed.
Unknown Number. No message. Just a missed call.
A shiver crept up your spine. Who would call you at this late hour? You stared at the screen, trying to breathe evenly as your mind raced for a logical explanation. A wrong number, maybe. A scam call. Something innocent. Your thumb hovered over the screen, debating whether to lock your phone and forget it, but then, the screen lit up again.
Unknown Number. Incoming Call.
It rang once. Twice. You swallowed. The apartment suddenly felt too quiet—like the walls were listening. Like something was holding its breath with you. Your finger trembled as it hovered above the “decline” button. But something stopped you. Curiosity? Fear? That twisted voice in your head whispering What if it’s not random?
You answered. The silence on the other end was immediate. No static. No breathing. Just... quiet. “Hello?” you said, your voice more unsure than you wanted it to be.
Still nothing.
And then—softly, like velvet soaked in something darker—a voice responded. “What number is this?” he asked.
“Ehm, who are you trying to reach?” you replied, trying to keep your tone steady.
“I don’t remember,” he answered, voice low, teasing.
You bit your lip, fighting the flutter his voice was causing deep in your chest. You didn’t want to admit it, but there was something… magnetic about the way he spoke. “If you don’t remember, maybe try calling them when you do,” you said quickly, trying to sound casual.
“Oh? Really?” he purred, amusement clear beneath the words.
“Yeah, bye,” you said firmly, and hung up.
Wrong number.
But then your phone lit up again. The same unknown number, calling you once more. You groaned, frustration and unease bubbling beneath your skin as you answered again. "What?"
A low chuckle rumbled through the speaker, slow and deliberate. "Now, now. Don’t do that tone with me." His voice wasn’t any louder, but it curled around your spine like smoke, thick and teasing.
You gulped. There was something about the way he said it—so familiar, so confident, like he knew you. Like he had every right to speak to you like that. You shifted slightly on the couch, glancing toward your window even though the blinds were shut tight. You suddenly felt watched. “I… I really think you have the wrong number,” you said quietly, voice tighter now, smaller.
He didn’t respond immediately. Then, slowly, like he was smiling behind every word. "Mmm. No. I think I’ve got exactly the right one."
Your grip on the phone tightened. "Who are you?" you asked, trying to keep the tremble out of your voice.
A pause.
Then, in that same velvet voice, low and dangerous. "Someone… wanting."
You blinked, confused. “Wanting? What do you mean—what do you want?” But he didn’t answer. Not directly. Instead, his voice shifted—just slightly. A little more playful. Mocking. "What’s your favorite scary movie?"
Your heart stopped for half a second. “Excuse me?” you asked, voice barely above a whisper now.
Another pause. You could hear the faintest breath, the kind someone lets out when they’re smiling just a little too wide. Like they’re enjoying every second of your confusion. “C’mon. Everyone has one.” The tone was lighter now, taunting, like he was trying to make this feel like a game. “Or do you only like romance?”
Your blood ran cold. That wasn’t just teasing. That was knowing.
He knew you liked romance. He knew you never talked about horror, how you instead cried at the end of movies where the love wasn’t strong enough. And that voice— God, that voice—it was ruining you.
You hated the way your skin prickled, the way your stomach dipped at the sound of it, the way your body betrayed your brain. It wasn’t fear, it was something darker. Something that twisted low in your gut and pulsed with heat beneath the chill. You didn’t know him. You couldn’t. And yet… he spoke like someone who memorized you.
Your silence seemed to thrill him. “I like scary movies,” he continued softly. “But only the ones with a pretty girl who doesn’t run fast enough.”
You jolted up from the couch, heart in your throat, instinctively checking the locks on your front door, the windows, the corners of your apartment. Your phone was still pressed to your ear.
“Don’t bother,” he said, voice dipping lower. “If I wanted to be inside, I would be.”
You froze mid-step, hand hovering above the kitchen window latch. Your heart was racing now, thudding so loud you swore he could hear it through the line. You swallowed hard and reached out anyway, checking the lock on the window with shaking fingers.
Then came his voice again—closer this time, somehow softer and more intimate. “Does that scare you, baby?”
Your breath hitched as you backed away from the window, phone still clutched in your hand, knuckles white. He sounded like he was right there. Like he was behind the glass, watching you fumble in the dark.
“It should.” He didn’t wait for you to respond. “You’re so easy to read. You get this little crease between your eyebrows when you’re panicking. You’re doing it now, aren’t you?”
You didn’t answer. You couldn’t. Your throat was too tight.
“Cute.” The word dripped through the receiver like poison disguised as honey. “Do you want me to stop?” Another pause, heavy and expectant. “Say the word. Tell me to stop.”
You wanted to. God, you wanted to. But your mouth wouldn’t move. Because a part of you—some dark, traitorous part—wasn’t sure you wanted him to.
The line stayed quiet. Waiting.
“That’s what I thought.” The call ended suddenly. And all you could hear now was your own breathing and the rain, still tapping gently against the glass.
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Heeseung leaned back in his chair, the soft creak barely audible over the quiet hum of his equipment. His eyes were locked on the monitor in front of him, the glow from the screen casting sharp shadows across his face.
There you were. Right there, in the center feed—framed in soft light, trembling slightly as you backed away from your kitchen window. He groaned, low and breathless, as he watched your expression twist in fear. You looked so small. So vulnerable. So perfect. Every little flinch, every shaky breath, every frantic glance to the door—he watched it all unfold through the tiny cameras he’d installed the night before.
He had been careful. Waited until you were asleep, crept in through the second-story window like a ghost, moving in total silence. The cameras were hidden—blended into vents, the back of your bookshelf, nestled above your kitchen cabinets. Nothing invasive… Just enough to see you. To know you. And God, he did. He knew everything.
Heeseung ran a hand over his face, exhaling slowly, eyes still glued to your screen. He had to admit, you were holding out better than he expected. He liked that about you. He leaned forward again, resting his elbows on the desk, his mouth curving into a soft smile as he watched you sit down slowly, phone still in your hand, eyes darting toward the hallway like you half-expected a shadow to crawl from it.
God, you were beautiful like this. Stripped down to your bare instincts—paranoia sharpening your every move.
Heeseung tilted his head slightly, watching as your hands trembled just enough to give you away. You were trying to hold it together. Trying not to look scared. Trying to convince yourself this was nothing. That it was just a prank call. That the world wasn’t closing in around you. But he knew, because he’d studied you—memorized every microexpression, every nervous habit, every subtle crack in your voice. And right now, you were falling apart so prettily. He let out a soft breath, tapping his fingers against his thigh. He could almost feel your fear like a pulse in the air and it thrilled him.
He knew a part of you didn’t hate the sudden attention. He saw the way you looked at the phone even after the call ended. How long your eyes lingered on the window, like a part of you was hoping to see someone out there. Someone you couldn’t name. Someone who already knew everything about you.
Heeseung bit his lip, dragging his gaze across the screen to watch the way you leaned forward, slowly, hesitantly, like your body couldn’t decide whether to run or stay rooted in place. “You’re already mine,” he whispered to the screen, voice soft. He reached toward the keyboard, fingers ghosting over the button that would turn the camera feed off… but paused. Instead, he opened a drawer beside him, pulling out a small velvet box. He turned it over in his hands, then opened it to reveal what lay inside. A single, perfect white lily. Your favorite. The same one you mentioned offhandedly two years ago at a party, when no one was listening—but he was. He always was. His eyes flicked back to the screen. Maybe it was time you started seeing just how much he cared. Really seeing it.
Tomorrow, he decided.
Tomorrow, you'd get a gift.
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You hadn’t meant to sleep in, but when you finally opened your eyes, the sun was already at the highest point, and the blinking numbers on your alarm clock told you it was late—well past anything productive. So you didn’t move. Not for a while. Because… what was the point? You felt drained. Like something invisible had pressed its hands against your shoulders and kept you pinned to the mattress, stealing the motivation to do anything. Even the thought of eating or showering felt too big to reach. So you stayed. Wrapped in your blanket, eyes half-focused on the cracks in the ceiling, letting the world outside spin without you. You kept thinking about the call. The voice. The way he spoke like he knew you—like he’d been watching you for longer than you could guess.
You told yourself it had to be a joke. Some sick prank. Someone with too much time on their hands and a voice changer. But it didn’t feel like a joke. It felt real. Too real.
You hadn’t checked your phone again. You didn’t want to. Just the thought of seeing that same number pop up made your skin crawl, your heart pound. You turned your head toward the window, half-expecting to see nothing but the usual blue sky but your gaze snagged on something. A velvet box sat on the windowsill. Perfectly placed, as if it had been waiting for you to notice.
It hadn’t been there a few minutes ago. It couldn’t have been. You hesitated for a moment, heart beginning to race, then slowly pushed the blanket off your legs and stood. Each step toward the window felt too loud in the stillness of your room. Your hand trembled as you reached for the latch, eyes flicking across the yard, the sidewalk, the trees beyond.
Nothing. No one. Just the quiet hum of wind and your own breath. You slid the window open with a reluctant creak, then reached out and carefully pulled the box inside. You opened it, and gasped.
Inside lay a single, perfect white lily.
That night, you barely moved after finding the box. You left it on your nightstand, wrapped shut in a towel, as if that could somehow make it less real.
By the time evening crept in, your body was running on autopilot. You went through the motions—washing your face, tying your hair back, standing under the harsh glow of the bathroom light like it might protect you from the dark pressing against your windows. You refused to look in the mirror for too long. You didn’t like the expression on your own face. You were reaching for your toothbrush when your phone, resting on the counter, lit up.
Your heart dropped.
Unknown Number. Again.
Your hand hovered over it, frozen, the dread curling tighter in your chest like a rope being pulled. It rang once. Twice. You should’ve ignored it. You should’ve thrown it across the room. But your finger moved before your brain caught up, and suddenly—
Click.
You pressed it to your ear. Didn’t speak. Didn’t breathe.
Then came the voice. That same voice, smooth and low, laced with something too soft to be safe. “Did you like the flower?”
You gripped the sink with your free hand, knuckles white. “Who the fuck are you?” you hissed, voice shaking. “What do you want from me?”
A short, amused breath. “That’s not a thank you.”
Your pulse pounded in your ears. You could hear your own breath now, loud.
“You looked beautiful this morning, by the way.”
Your entire body went cold. “I didn’t leave the house,” you whispered.
He laughed—soft, delighted, fond. Like you’d said something endearing. Like he loved watching you piece it together. “I know.” A pause. “I always know.”
You didn’t respond. Couldn’t. Your throat was tight, heart hammering so loud you thought it might drown out his voice. But it didn’t. You heard everything. The sound of his breath. The low hum of satisfaction in his tone. Like this wasn’t fear to him. It was foreplay.
“You have no idea how long I’ve waited for this,” he murmured. “To hear your voice. To talk to you without pretending anymore.”
You braced yourself against the sink, your hand shaking as it hovered near the phone. “You’re sick.”
Another soft laugh. “I’m devoted. There’s a difference.”
You felt something twist in your gut. A mix of fear and something worse crawling under your skin like poison. Because it wasn’t just his words. It was the way he sounded when he said them. Like he believed it. Like he worshipped you.
“You’ve let so many of them touch you,” he said next, voice quiet, dangerous. “People who didn’t even know your favorite flower. People who didn’t care when you cried.”
You went still.
“But I did,” he added. “I always cared. I see you. I’ve always seen you.”
Your mouth opened—no words came.
“Don’t be afraid of me, baby,” he whispered, almost gentle now. “I’d never hurt you.” His voice dripped with sincerity, as if that made everything he’d said before… less terrifying. As if breaking into your life, watching you, leaving flowers on your window—all of it—was some kind of act of love.
You couldn’t speak. Your throat was dry, your pulse thundered in your ears, and yet—your body refused to move. Rooted to the bathroom floor, still clutching the phone, still listening to him like he had you under a spell.
And maybe he did.
“They didn’t deserve you,” he continued, voice low and firm, like he needed you to believe him. “None of them saw you the way I do. They only wanted to break you.”
Your knees nearly buckled. You reached for the counter for support, but your hand slipped—your palm knocking your toothbrush to the floor with a soft clatter. The noise startled you back into the moment, just long enough to feel a sharp pang of clarity cut through the fog.
This wasn’t romantic. It wasn’t sweet. It was wrong. It was dangerous.
“I don’t know you,” you whispered finally, your voice barely audible.
There was a breath of silence. “Oh, not fully,” he replied, tone smooth, unbothered. “But that’s okay. Because I know everything about you.”
Your stomach flipped.
“Like how you forgot to lock your bedroom window…”
Your breath hitched violently, body going rigid. The phone trembled in your hand now.
No. No, you hadn’t. You’d checked it. Twice. You always checked. You were sure—weren’t you? Slowly, eyes wide with disbelief, you turned your head toward the hallway, where your bedroom door sat half-open in the dim light. The shadows beyond it suddenly felt too thick.
“Or how you sleep with one leg out of the blanket when you’re too warm,” he continued, voice softer now, as if he were reminiscing. “You hum to yourself in the shower. You talk in your sleep when you’re anxious. You said your favorite scent was rain on pavement once. You don’t even remember saying it, do you?”
Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes. You backed up slowly, retreating from the hallway like the shadows might reach out and grab you. “Stop,” you whispered, barely holding your voice together. “Please stop.”
He ignored you. “You tilt your head when you read something sad. You chew your straw when you're lost in thought. You cried three nights ago.”
The phone slipped from your hand, clattering to the tile floor with a sharp, echoing sound. Your chest rose and fell in shallow, rapid breaths as the silence pressed down around you like a second skin. Every creak of the floorboards. Every distant car outside. You stared at the phone lying on the tile floor where it had fallen, but you didn’t pick it up. You couldn’t. Your fingers were too numb, too shaky. Instead, your eyes flicked around the room, searching, until they landed on the only thing within reach.
A hairdryer.
It wasn’t much. It wasn’t anything, really. But in your trembling grip, it felt like something. Like you were trying. You inched toward the bathroom door, barefoot and tense, your breath caught somewhere between your lungs and throat. The hallway beyond was quiet, lit only by the dull glow of your bedroom lamp down the hall. Shadows stretched long across the walls, dancing every time your body shifted.
You hesitated at the threshold, hand clutching the hairdryer so tight your knuckles ached. Then, slowly you peeked out.
No one. Not in the hall. Not in the corners. Not in the bedroom. But that didn’t mean you were alone. You stepped out, your heartbeat thudding in your ears louder than your own footsteps. You moved slowly, glancing over your shoulder every few seconds, sure you’d catch someone disappearing just out of frame.
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Heeseung didn’t move. He didn’t need to.
He was tucked into the shadows like he belonged there—silent, still, a shadow in the shape of a man. The mask wasn’t on yet. Not for this part. This moment was his. And he wanted to see you clearly.
You moved so slowly, so carefully, your bare feet padding along the hardwood floor like you expected the house to turn on you at any second. You were gripping a hairdryer in your hand, knuckles white, body trembling—holding it like it was a weapon. Like it could save you from whatever monster you thought might be lurking.
Heeseung nearly smiled.
God, you were adorable. Clutching that little thing like it was a sword, trying to be brave in the middle of your fear.
Your fear that he gave you. That he fed from.
You were trembling, vulnerable, beautiful in the way only you could be when you thought you were alone—when your instincts were screaming that something was wrong, but you still pressed forward anyway.
So brave. So stupid. So perfect.
Slowly, with a quiet reverence like he was performing a ritual, Heeseung reached into the shadows beside him and picked it up.
The white mask. Simple, smooth, emotionless.
He had found it in a Halloween store years ago, half off and hanging beside plastic axes and fake vampire teeth. It had looked ridiculous on the shelf. Just a cheap costume piece, nothing special.
But in his hands… it became something else.
It became his face. The one the town would fear. And more importantly—the one you wouldn’t recognize. Because as long as he wore it, he could be the monster that haunted your nights, and still be the boy who held the door for you at the coffee shop. The one who smiled quietly from across campus. The one you never looked at twice.
He could be both. And he was.
Heeseung slipped the mask over his face with practiced ease, the cool plastic fitting perfectly against his skin, hiding all the things he didn't want you to see. The world blurred behind the eye holes, but it didn’t matter. He didn’t need clarity to see you.
He watched you pace down the hall, your back turned to him now, completely unaware that just down the corridor, in the walls of your own home—he was there.
The corners of his mouth tugged upward behind the mask, invisible but real. You thought you were being careful. You thought you were alone. But he’d been here longer than you knew. Inside your home. Inside your routines. Inside your mind.
And tonight, watching wasn’t enough anymore.
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You had just passed the living room.
The hallway behind you stretched long and dim, and the silence clung to your skin like static. You clutched the hairdryer tighter in your hand, your pulse pounding against your temple. Something still wasn’t right. The air was too still. You should’ve trusted your instincts the second the chill ran down your spine. But by the time you stopped—by the time you turned—
It was already too late.
There was a sound—soft, like the shift of weight on hardwood—and then he was there. A flash of white. A blank, faceless mask. The glint of dark eyes behind the holes, locked onto you like prey.
You barely had time to gasp before he lunged. "No!" you cried out, stumbling back, trying to raise the hairdryer in defense—but it didn’t matter. He was fast. Too fast.
His body slammed into yours, knocking you clean off your feet. You hit the ground with a sharp thud, the air knocked from your lungs, the hairdryer clattering across the floor uselessly. His weight pinned you down, not crushing, but inescapable. Precise. Controlled.
You thrashed beneath him, heart hammering, limbs shaking, but he caught your wrists in one strong hand and held them above your head with terrifying ease.
Your eyes met the hollow black gaze of the mask hovering inches above your face. And you knew he was watching you. Drinking in every second. You could feel his breath through the thin voice modulator, warm against your cheek as he hovered too close.
“You’re even more beautiful up close,” he whispered, voice low and muffled. “Terrified. Shaking. Finally looking at me like I matter.”
You squeezed your eyes shut. “Let me go—please—” Your voice cracked. It sounded too desperate.
He groaned at the sound of your voice—quiet, trembling, raw. There was something about your desperation that broke him open from the inside, something he’d craved without fully realizing it until now. So soft. So real. So his.
His gloved hand moved with agonizing slowness, reaching toward your face like he meant to soothe you.
But your gaze snapped downward—Not to his hand. To the knife still gripped tightly.
The blade gleamed dully in the low light, and now it was inches from your face. Your breath caught violently, your body going rigid under him, the fear suddenly clawing its way to the surface in full. You whimpered before you could stop yourself, eyes wide as you tried to lean away—tried to pull your head back.
His eyes behind the mask didn’t miss it. He let out a low hum of satisfaction, fingers brushing along your jaw in a mockery of affection, while the knife hovered dangerously close, threatening, intimate. “Look at you,” he murmured. “So pretty when you’re scared.”
You clenched your jaw, trying to suppress the sob clawing at your throat. “I won’t scream,” you whispered. “I won’t… I won’t tell anyone. Just—please don’t hurt me.”
That earned a soft chuckle through the mask. “Hurt you?” he repeated, as if the very idea offended him. “No, no, no, baby. You still don’t get it.” He brought the knife a little closer—just enough for the cold metal to kiss your cheek, resting lightly against your skin. “This?” he whispered. “This isn’t for you. This is for them.” He tilted his head, mask brushing against your hair as he leaned in further. “The ones who made you cry. The ones who left you. The ones who used you like you were nothing.” His voice dropped to a near growl. “I made sure they’d never touch you again.”
Your blood ran cold as the blade drifted slowly along your skin. From your cheek, down the line of your jaw, and then… to your throat. He wasn’t applying pressure. But you could feel the threat beneath every movement. Like he was savoring the moment.
You didn’t dare breathe.
Then it moved lower—down the center of your chest, ghosting over the thin fabric of your top. You tensed, your fists still trapped above your head, nails digging into your own palms, breath trembling through your lips.
And then he said it. Calm. Casual. Like you were discussing fashion. “This top doesn’t look good on you…” He tilted his head. “Let’s get rid of it, shall we?”
Before you could scream, move, beg—The knife slashed.
A quick flick of his wrist, and the fabric split cleanly from collar to hem with a quiet tearing sound. You gasped, instinctively twisting beneath him, but he only pressed a little closer, still holding your wrists firm, still watching. The ruined fabric fluttered open slightly, exposing bare skin to the cold air of the room—and to him.
He let out a low hum of satisfaction behind the mask. “Much better…” He brought the knife back—not the edge, but the blunt side—and pressed it gently against your bare skin.
You flinched. Not from pain, but from the cold. From the weight of his stare behind that blank mask. From the way he watched every reaction. Every shaky breath. Every involuntary shiver. Every whispered, broken “please…”
He dragged the back of the blade slowly down the center of your chest, past your ribs, following the rise and fall of your breathing like a line only he was allowed to trace. “So soft now,” he murmured, almost mockingly. “Where’d all that attitude go, hm?”
You clenched your jaw.
“You were so mouthy on the phone. So brave.” His voice dipped, cruel now. “And now look at you.” The blade drifted lower, slow enough to keep you shaking, but never cutting. Never quite crossing that line. “Begging. Squirming. Needy little thing.” He leaned closer, his breath fanning hot across your cheek. “Is this what you wanted all along?”
You shook your head. “No,” you whispered, though even you could hear how weak it sounded.
“Liar.” His tone turned sharp, cold. “You liked pretending to be scared when we both know you’ve never had this kind of attention in your life.”
Your face burned with humiliation—and something else. Because the worst part wasn’t what he was saying. It was that he wasn’t entirely wrong.
You would never admit it out loud. Not to him. Not even to yourself.
Something deep inside—buried beneath years of being overlooked, unloved, untouched something was stirring. Something you had locked away, stuffed into the furthest corner of your mind like a shameful secret. It was preening under the weight of his obsession. Sick with need. Starving for affection in any form it came. And for the first time… it was clawing at the bars of the mental prison you built for it.
You hated it. You hated him. You hated how your body reacted.
You stared up at him—at the hollow, unmoving face of the mask as his voice dripped like poison into your ears.
"Pathetic little thing," he murmured, dragging the blunt side of the knife along your stomach, just enough pressure to make you shiver again. "Is this all it takes to make you fall apart?"
Your lips parted, breath catching, but you bit down hard on the inside of your cheek. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. You wouldn’t let him see the way your body responded. You couldn’t. “No,” you said, forcing your voice to come out even. But it didn’t. It cracked. And he heard it.
He laughed softly—so quietly—like you’d confirmed something for him. "Liar," he whispered. "You say no, but you're shaking like you want me to keep going. Like your body already made the choice your mouth won't admit."
You turned your face away from him, shame burning deep in your chest. Your wrists still pinned. The ruined fabric of your top spread open beneath you like an invitation you never meant to give.
He moved the blade up again, slowly, deliberately trailing it up your side. His free hand ghosted over your hip, then your ribs, not quite touching. Hovering. Always watching. Always calculating how far he could go.
"You want someone to control you. To put you in your place. You act like you're better than that, but you’re not."
You shook your head. “Shut up.”
"You don't want a prince," he growled, the knife pressed flat against your sternum now, "You want a cage. You want to be owned."
“No, I don’t!” you snapped.
He stilled. Then, slowly, his head tilted, eyes behind the mask locked on your every twitch. "Then why aren’t you fighting harder?”
You had no answer. Because your voice kept denying him, and still—your skin was on fire beneath every word. Your muscles ached from holding back every reaction. Your body and your mind were at war, and you didn’t know which one was losing faster.
You were unraveling. And he knew it. God, he knew it. And that was what he wanted. To take you apart. To make you question where fear ended and surrender began.
It took everything in you to stay still. To not recoil. To not lean into it.
The knife slid higher again—not sharp enough to cut, but cold enough to make you feel every inch of the movement. A line of pressure. A silent threat. And you hated yourself for noticing how steady his hand was. How controlled. How he handled you like he already knew every reaction you’d try to hide.
He laughed softly—low, cruel, and devastatingly satisfied. “Your mouth lies,” he whispered. “But your body loves me.”
You shook your head, voice cracking before the words even formed. “No—”
But he was already answering you, voice dropping into that mocking warmth that made your skin crawl. “Sweetheart, you’re dripping desperation... Even now. Even when you’re terrified. Isn’t that sick?”
You wanted to scream. To cry. To vanish from under his gaze, from under the weight of his words. Because they stuck to you like oil—foul and heavy and impossible to wipe off. It made that part of you whisper.
Please. Don’t stop.
You clenched your jaw, as if that alone could silence it. As if willpower could erase the ache of being seen.
He watched your silence with the patience of a predator that had already won. “You don’t have to pretend,” he murmured. “Not with me. I know what you look like when you’re lying. And I know what you look like when you want to be caught.”
You shook your head again, a little more forcefully this time. But the tears gathering in your eyes betrayed you. Your silence betrayed you. The tears gathering in your eyes betrayed you.
In one smooth motion, his gloved hand moved and wrapped gently but firmly around your throat.
Your breath caught. Not from the pressure, but from the sheer shock of it. The control it implied. Your eyes widened, your body going rigid beneath him, and you choked on a breath that barely made it past your lips.
His masked face tilted closer, close enough that you could hear every breath he took behind the plastic. “Why so quiet, puppet?” he asked softly. “What happened to all that fire?”
The nickname cut through you like a cold wind, mocking, possessive, knowing. You swallowed hard beneath his hand, the tension in your throat pressing against his palm. Still, you didn’t answer. You didn’t trust your voice. You didn’t trust what might come out if you opened your mouth.
He hummed, like your silence only amused him more. “You were so strong, weren’t you?” he murmured. “So sure you’d fight me off. Tell me I’m wrong. That you don’t feel anything when I touch you.”
You shook your head again, slower this time. Less defiant. More… confused. At him. At yourself.
His thumb moved slightly—tracing the line of your jaw now, not pushing, just resting there. “So why are you crying?” he asked, voice so low it could’ve been mistaken for concern. “Is it because you want me to stop… or because you’re afraid I might?”
You didn’t have an answer. Maybe there wasn’t one.
He watched you beneath him—still trembling and crying—and yet not fighting like you should have been. Like you could have been. “You should admit it,” he said softly, his voice taking on that familiar, dangerous sweetness that made your stomach turn. “You love this.”
You shook your head, lips trembling. “No… I don’t…”
He clicked his tongue. “You do. You love the idea of someone obsessing over you. Watching you. Following you. You love knowing you have me wrapped around your little finger this whole time.” His words cut deeper than his knife ever had.
Because part of you had wondered. Had sensed something off. Had ignored every red flag, every shadow where it didn’t belong, every chill down your spine—because something in you liked being wanted.
He leaned down again, his voice now right beside your ear. “You want control, but you also want to be seen. To be needed. Worshipped. Owned.”
Your eyes squeezed shut. “Shut up.”
“Make me.” The words were a taunt but his tone was tender. “Say you hate it. Say you hate me.”
You forced the words out, voice shaking, catching in your throat like glass splinters. “I… I hate it. I hate you.” But it didn’t come out the way you wanted it to. It wasn’t sharp. It wasn’t angry. It was small. Weak. Almost pleading.
He giggled. A soft, breathy sound—mocking and delighted. “Say it like you mean it, baby,” he murmured. “Or else I won’t believe it…” His hand didn’t squeeze, not enough to hurt, But it pressed. Enough to make your breath hitch. Enough to remind you that he was still holding all the power, and you were still pretending not to want it. “Go on,” he whispered, his voice curling around you like smoke. “Try again.”
You blinked up at the ceiling, tears spilling freely now, teeth clenched as your chest rose and fell in uneven rhythm. The panic, the shame, the betrayal your own body felt toward you, they all crashed together in a tide too thick to swim through. You didn’t repeat yourself. And that was all the answer he needed.
He’s masked face tilted, his thumb brushing away a tear that had slipped down your temple. “Stop lying to me, sweetheart,” he said softly. “I already know what you’re too scared to admit.”
Your chest heaved, trying desperately to suck in enough air—but it wasn’t enough. The pressure wasn’t brutal, but it was constant, just enough to tip the scale. Just enough to steal the oxygen from your lungs, second by second. You struggled for a while longer—your legs twitching weakly beneath him, hands still trembling where they had no strength left to fight.
And then. Everything started to fade.
The room tilted, colors bleeding at the edges of your vision. The heaviness behind your eyes swelled, swallowing the light. Your limbs slackened. Your breathing slowed. And then you went still.
Heeseung felt it the moment you lost consciousness. The exact second your body gave out—limp, soft, breath shallow beneath him. He froze, hovering over you, staring. Then, after a heartbeat of silence, he slowly pulled his hand back from your throat. Just looked down at you. Silent. Calm. Like a painting he’d finally finished. His gloved fingers brushed gently down your cheek before he reached into his coat pocket and pulled out his phone.
Click.
One picture. Just one.
You—quiet, breath barely rising beneath your torn shirt, tears still drying on your cheeks. He slipped the phone away and exhaled softly. Not rushed. Not guilty. Just… satisfied. Then, with surprising care, he leaned forward and slid one arm under your legs, the other beneath your back—lifting you as if you were something delicate.
His.
He carried you to your bed, moving through your space like he belonged there and lowered you gently onto the mattress, arranging you like he had rehearsed it in his head a thousand times before.
And then, he reached up. Fingers curled around the bottom of the white mask. And slowly, he lifted it just enough to reveal his mouth, his jaw, the sharp line of a smile that was real this time—not hidden behind the plastic.
He leaned in. Softly—almost lovingly—he pressed a kiss to your forehead. Just one. Then he straightened, tugged the mask back down over his face, and turned toward your window.
Silent. Swift. And gone.
By the time the night air drifted in and your curtains swayed again, you were still asleep. Alone in your bed.
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You woke up in your bed, groggy and disoriented. For a long, slow moment, you thought it had been a dream. But your shirt was still torn. Your throat still ached. And your phone was still on the bathroom floor.
Reality settled in like a weight on your chest. You sat up slowly, arms wrapped around yourself, scanning the room for any sign that he might still be there. But it was quiet. And cold.
It took everything in you to find your voice—just enough of it to make the call. Hands shaking, you dialed.
“911, what’s your emergency?”
You stumbled through the explanation. You only left out the parts you couldn’t say out loud. Not because they weren’t real, but because saying them might make you sound unhinged.
The dispatcher was calm. Professional. Asked for a description. Took your name. Filed a report.
But when you asked what else could be done—what protection they could offer, how soon someone could come, their answer was a practiced kind of politeness that chilled you more than the silence in your room had. “Unless there’s an active threat on-site, we can’t dispatch an officer without cause.”
You paused. “But—he was here. I w—”
“Yes, and we have that in the report. If you call again and say you’re in danger, we’ll send someone immediately. I promise. But right now… there’s nothing else we can do.”
You were silent, lips parted, throat dry.
Then the dispatcher added, a little too casually. “But for now, we’ll dispatch a police officer to your house to run some investigations around the area. Ask a few neighbors. Just to cover protocol.”
That’s all.
Your fingers tightened around the phone. “Right,” you said quietly. “That’s… helpful.”
It wasn’t. You knew it. They knew it. A single officer showing up after the fact to ask a few questions wouldn’t stop anything—not someone like him. But it was something. And right now, something was better than nothing.
After hanging up, you sat in the silence of your apartment, still wrapped in the same clothes from last night. The air felt heavy. Your skin felt wrong. You hadn’t even dared to look in the mirror. You moved to your front window and looked out through the blinds, half-expecting him to be standing there.
He wasn’t. But that didn’t calm you.
Because if he was watching... He wouldn’t be where you could see him.
The knock on the door came an hour later.
You hesitated before answering, fingers curled tightly around the doorknob as you peered through the peephole. A uniform. A badge. A clipboard. You opened the door slowly.
“Miss Y/N?” the officer asked, glancing down at his notes. “Officer Han. Just here to follow up on the report you filed this morning.”
You stepped aside and let him in, your voice still hoarse. “Yeah. Thanks for coming.”
He entered with casual ease, taking a slow look around your apartment. No urgency. No tension. Just a faint smirk as he glanced at you again—and lingered a second too long. “I’ve had a lot of strange calls,” he said, chuckling under his breath. “But this one’s new.”
You bristled, but didn’t say anything.
He circled through your living room, checked the locks, the windows, even glanced at your bedroom door before shrugging. “No signs of forced entry. No footprints, no prints at all, actually. Window’s closed. Frame’s clean.” He turned to you and raised an eyebrow. “You sure you didn’t just have a bad dream?”
Your stomach twisted. “It wasn’t a dream.”
He nodded like he was humoring you, not believing you. “Right.” He made a few notes on his clipboard and then, with a glance at your bare legs beneath your oversized hoodie, added, “Well, it’s a good thing nothing happened to you. Would’ve been a shame.”
You didn’t answer.
He gave you a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “You got anyone staying with you? A boyfriend maybe?”
You blinked. “Why does that matter?”
“Just thinking it might be safer. You’re pretty. Wouldn’t want someone creeping around again.”
You wanted to scream. Instead, you folded your arms. “Are you going to file your report?”
He raised his hands. “Alright, alright. Don’t bite.” He handed you a thin card. “Here’s my number. If anything happens again… or if you just need someone to keep an eye on the place tonight, I’m off-duty after six.”
You didn’t take it.
He set it on your counter anyway and left without looking back.
The second the door shut, you stood there, frozen. No answers. No protection. Just another man who didn’t take you seriously—who looked at you and saw an opportunity instead of a person.
The next morning, you were barely awake when the television in your living room crackled with breaking news.
You blinked at the screen from the couch, blanket wrapped around you, mind still clouded with anxiety and sleeplessness. Your ears caught only pieces at first.
“…body discovered this morning at a local motel…”
You sat up slowly.
The anchor’s voice was grim, serious now.
“The victim has been identified as Officer Han, who was reported missing last night after failing to return from a routine follow-up investigation.”
You leaned forward, eyes fixed on the screen. The image shifted to grainy motel security footage. A figure entering alone. The camera timestamp was from last night.
“Police were dispatched after the motel’s cleaning staff found the body early this morning. Authorities are calling the scene gruesome and disturbing, with signs of overkill and personal rage.”
Overkill.
Personal.
You barely breathed as the reporter continued.
“No suspects have been identified. Investigators declined to comment on whether this is connected to the recent string of local murders.”
But you already knew.
Your heart pounded in your chest, ice curling through your veins. It wasn’t just a coincidence. It wasn’t random. He had been watching.
And now, the man who didn’t believe you—who dismissed your fear and left you with a smirk—was dead. Killed for touching your space. But then—the dread sank deeper.
How would he know? You hadn’t told anyone. No one else was there. You hadn’t even said anything out loud. Your blood turned to ice.
No.No, no, no.
You stood abruptly, heart racing. Panic poured into your limbs like fire. You tore through your apartment, yanking open drawers, crawling under furniture, pulling books and photo frames off shelves.
Every corner. Every surface.
The chaos grew—piles of clothes tossed across the floor, cushions ripped from the couch, your closet emptied in seconds flat.
And then you saw it.
Tucked just behind one of the vents. Too small to notice unless you were looking for it. A black dot. A tiny lens. A blinking red light.
A camera.
Recording. Watching.
Your breath caught in your throat as you stared at it—this quiet little parasite hidden in your wall, this thing that had seen everything. You took a step back, grabbing a chair with shaking hands, your mind racing with thoughts of smashing it until it stopped blinking—
Your phone rang.
The shrill sound cut through the silence like a blade, making you jump. Your heart already knew before your eyes confirmed it. You looked down at the screen.
Unknown Number.
Your fingers froze. The world felt smaller. Tighter. Like it was caving in.
The ringing kept going.
You didn’t want to answer. But you couldn’t ignore it. With trembling hands, you lifted the phone to your ear, breath shallow. “…Hello?” There was silence—just for a second. Then his voice slipped through, smooth and sickeningly condescending.
“You really should just leave it alone, sweetheart.”
Your spine stiffened. “Like hell I will,” you snapped, louder than you meant to. “I’m going to smash it. I’ll crush it so hard there won’t be anything left—”
He tsked softly, cutting you off with a mocking sigh. “There it is,” he said, voice lilting. “The tantrum. The mouth.” Then his tone changed—sharper now, lower. The way someone might speak to a child acting out. “You love pretending you have control. But you never do, baby. Not really.”
You froze in place, knuckles white as your hand tightened around the phone.
“Putting on such a brave little face over the phone… But when you're underneath me…” His voice dipped—quiet, dangerous. “You turn into a pathetic, needy little mess. Don’t you?”
You clenched your jaw, trying to hold in the shaky breath that wanted to escape—trying so hard not to react. Not to show weakness. Not to let him win. But you knew he could feel it. Through your silence. Through the way your breath hitched. Through the way your gaze drifted back toward the camera.
“There she is…” he murmured, like he was smiling again. “Poor baby. Is it getting hard for you to think?”
You stared into the blinking red light, your body locked in place. He was turning your fear into something else—twisting it, warping it until even you couldn’t tell what was real. Every breath felt too loud. Every inch of your skin felt watched. Violated. But worst of all… you couldn’t move.
The silence stretched on the line for a second too long. Then his voice returned, laced with something dark and cold underneath. “That officer…” he said, almost like he was thinking aloud. “He deserved it.”
Your heart dropped.
“He looked at you like you were a thing. Like you were for anyone.”
He exhaled slowly through the speaker—something more controlled than anger. Possession. “He had no right. No one does. No one should ever see you like that except me.” His voice sharpened. “Only me.”
Your throat tightened. Your breath came faster, uneven now, like your body didn’t know what it was supposed to feel anymore.
“He thought he could touch what isn’t his.” His tone dropped, almost a growl now. “So I made sure he’ll never look at you again.”
The whimper slipped from you before you could stop it. Quiet. Shameful. Your hand flew up to your mouth—but it was too late.
He heard it. And he laughed. “Oh…” he purred, “you liked that, didn’t you?”
Your chest stung with the effort to keep still, to fight the heat crawling up your neck, the betrayal of your own body leaning into the sound of his voice.
“You like knowing what I’d do for you.” A pause. Then softer—“What I have done.”
He continued, voice like velvet over a blade. “You pretend you’re afraid of me. But deep down, you’re afraid of what it means that you’re not running.”
Your lips parted, but no sound came. Because he wasn’t wrong. You hadn’t moved from the spot where you found the camera. You hadn’t screamed or smashed it yet. Your phone was still pressed to your ear like it anchored you—like his voice had a hold you couldn’t break, no matter how badly you wanted to. And it terrified you. Not just that he was watching. Not just that he’d killed. But that a part of you—small and broken and starved—was listening too closely. Breathing too hard. And not looking away. You hated that. You hated you.
“See?” he whispered, sweet like poison. “You don’t need to say it. I already know.”
Your fingers curled tighter around the phone, knuckles aching, heart thudding painfully against your ribs.
“It’s okay to stop pretending, baby.” There was a beat of silence. “Be scared of what you’d become without me.”
Your knees felt weak. The room spun. Your breath hitched and stuttered in your chest. You hadn’t even realized you were crying until the tears blurred your vision completely. The phone slipped from your hand and hit the floor with a soft clatter.
You ran. Shoeless, directionless—your only thought was out. Out of the walls that had betrayed you. Out of the air that felt too heavy to breathe. The front door slammed behind you. Cool air rushed over your skin like a slap, but it wasn’t enough. Nothing was enough. You weren’t even sure where you were going. You just needed space. Distance. Something real. You didn’t realize your eyes were squeezed shut until your shoulder collided hard with someone’s chest. You stumbled back, startled. Hands gently caught your arms to steady you.
“Whoa, hey—are you okay?” The voice was soft. Familiar. Concerned.
Your eyes blinked open, vision still swimming, and then your breath caught again.
Heeseung.
Heeseung from school. From class. From quiet afternoons and passing conversations you remembered.
He looked down at you, brows knit, gaze sweeping over your tear-streaked face and shaking hands. “Y/N?” he said gently. “What happened?”
You stared at him, mind racing. He looked… normal. Kind. Steady. Just Heeseung. Safe. Right?
You couldn’t answer him. Your mouth wouldn’t move. Your voice was lost somewhere behind the panic and exhaustion twisting through your chest. So instead you stepped forward and collapsed into him. Your fingers curled tightly into his sweater like it was the only thing anchoring you to the earth, and your face buried itself against his shoulder. The sobs came next—choked and raw, your whole body trembling from the weight of everything you’d tried so hard to hold together.
He didn’t flinch. He didn’t ask questions. Heeseung simply wrapped his arms around you and held you. One hand cradled the back of your head, the other resting firmly between your shoulder blades—like he’d done this before, like he’d always known how to hold you. His voice was soft in your ear. “Shh… you’re okay. You’re safe now.”
The words should’ve comforted you. But a sliver of doubt lodged itself somewhere deep inside your ribs. Because part of you still didn’t know why his embrace felt so familiar.
You don’t know how long you cried. Minutes, maybe more. But eventually, the sobs softened, your breathing steadied, and the tremble in your hands began to fade.
Heeseung didn’t rush you. He just held you, his hand moving in slow, steady circles against your back, his chin resting lightly on the top of your head like he’d done it a hundred times before.
When you finally pulled away, his eyes met yours gently. “Come on,” he said. “Let’s get you inside, yeah?”
You nodded numbly.
He simply kept one arm around you as he gently steered you back toward the complex, keeping his touch light but steady.
When you reached your door, your legs wavered slightly, and without a word, he slipped his hand around your wrist to help guide you inside. The place looked the same. Still messy from your frantic search. Still silent. Still watched. You didn’t look at the vent again. You couldn’t.
And you didn’t mention the camera.
Heeseung closed the door quietly behind you, eyes sweeping across the room just once before they returned to you—soft, unreadable. “You should sit,” he said gently, nodding toward the couch.
You let him lead you there, your limbs slow and heavy. The moment you sank into the cushions, you felt his arm around your shoulders again—wrapping you up in quiet warmth like he’d been waiting for this exact moment. You didn’t see the flicker of a smile tug at the corner of his lips. It was subtle. Brief. Gone before you could lift your eyes. But it was there.
And as you leaned against him, his hand moved carefully over your arm, soothing, familiar—too familiar.
“It’s okay,” he murmured, resting his chin lightly atop your head.
You let your eyes close. Because in that moment, even with the storm still raging quietly beneath your skin…
He felt like the only person in the world who hadn’t left you.
And that’s exactly what he wanted.
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With Heeseung, you felt safe.
You didn’t know when it started, when the panic in your chest began to ease the moment he stepped into the room, or when his voice became the one sound that could cut through the noise in your head.
He felt like your rock. The one steady thing in a world that kept tilting.
When you broke down, he didn’t flinch. He stayed. Listened. Held you when you couldn’t hold yourself together. He never made you feel like a burden, never treated your pain like it was inconvenient or dramatic. He treated you like you were more than a body to use and discard. Like you were worth something. Like you mattered.
There was dignity in the way he spoke to you. In the way he looked at you. Like he saw the parts of you no one else had bothered to slow down for. And maybe that’s why—despite everything, you stayed close to him. Because Heeseung was comfort. He was quiet safety in the storm. He was the only one who made you feel like you didn’t have to survive everything alone. And more than anything… You trusted him.
He never said it outright. Never told you to rely on him. He didn’t need to. Because whenever the world tried to pull you back into the dark—he caught you.
The first time a toxic ex showed up, it was sudden. You’d gone out to get air. Coffee. Something. And he was just there, leaning against a wall like he’d never broken you, like he deserved a second chance just because he decided he was bored again.
His words were sweet, poisonous. All charm and empty promises. You were frozen. Until Heeseung appeared.
He didn’t say a word at first. Just stepped up beside you, his body a wall between you and the past. His expression unreadable—but his presence said everything.
Back off.
When the ex didn’t take the hint—when his hand brushed your arm like he still had a right to—you flinched.
And Heeseung moved.
A single punch. Fast. Brutal. The guy stumbled back, clutching his face, cursing, scrambling like the coward he was.
Heeseung didn’t look at him. He looked at you. “You okay?”
And that—that—was when something inside you started to shift. Because it wasn’t just that he protected you. It was the way he didn’t ask permission to. The way he made it feel like he should be the only one standing by your side. Because no one had ever fought for you like that. No one had ever looked at you like they’d burn the world for daring to hurt you. And in that quiet, terrifying way—He became the safest place you knew.
It happened slowly.
At first, you just leaned on him when things were hard. Then you leaned on him when they weren’t. He answered every call. Showed up without you asking. Knew when you hadn’t eaten, when you hadn’t slept, when you were about to spiral—before you even did.
And you didn’t notice, at first, how the others began to drift away. Your friends stopped texting as often. One of them called once—just once—to ask why you never came out anymore. Why you never replied. Heeseung had been beside you when your phone rang.
He watched your screen light up. And he said nothing. He didn’t have to.
You silenced the call.
It became easier to stay in. Easier to say, “I’m tired.” Easier to believe no one understood you like Heeseung did anyway. Because he got it.
When you were anxious, he pulled you closer. When the nightmares came back, he held you until you fell asleep. When you doubted yourself, he reminded you how they were the problem. How he was the only one who saw you clearly. Who never left. Who never lied.
“You don’t need them,” he said once, brushing your hair behind your ear. “They don’t know how to take care of you.”
And you believed it. Because somewhere between all the sleepless nights and whispered reassurances, you’d forgotten what it felt like to stand on your own.
You stopped reaching out. Stopped checking your messages. Stopped answering your door.
The only voice that mattered was his.
And when you were with him, when he wrapped his arms around you and murmured, “I’ve got you,” into your hair you felt like maybe that was enough. It didn’t feel like control. Not at first.
He never yelled. Never threatened. Never even raised his voice. Everything he did came wrapped in affection—warmth so convincing it made you question why you’d ever trusted anyone else.
When you forgot to respond to a message from a former classmate, he smiled gently. “It’s better that way.” He brushed his thumb over your knuckles. “They never showed up when it counted. Why give them your energy now?”
When you mentioned your job stress, the way your boss ignored your ideas, Heeseung tilted his head, eyes soft and full of concern. “You don’t need to stay somewhere that doesn’t value you.”
You left the job two weeks later. He was proud. He always was.
“See?” he whispered in your ear one night, arms coiled around your waist. “It’s better when it’s just us.”
The more things you let go of—people, routines, independence—the more he filled the space they left behind. He started handling things for you. Picking up your groceries before you asked. Changing your locks for “safety.” Memorizing your schedule better than you did.
And when you forgot something—your meds, a meal, an appointment—he’d kiss your forehead and murmur. “That’s why you need me, baby. The world’s too much. But I’ve got you.”
You smiled, nodded. Felt warm and taken care of. Even as the walls in your apartment felt closer. Even as your phone stayed off more often than on. Even as your name started to feel like it only existed in his mouth. You didn’t leave the apartment for days at a time now. Sometimes, it felt easier not to.
Because when you did, people looked at you like a stranger. But Heeseung looked at you like you were the center of the universe.
“You were never meant to belong to them,” he said one night, pressing his lips to your temple. “You were made for me.”
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The day had been normal. Heeseung had made you breakfast, kissed your forehead, reminded you to drink water and take your vitamins. You had even gone outside, just for a short walk. Heeseung said it was good for you, and with him just a block behind, you’d felt… okay.
But that illusion shattered the moment you turned a corner and nearly walked straight into her.
Your ex-friend.
She didn’t smile. Didn’t look surprised to see you. She looked… hungry—like she’d been waiting for this. “Wow,” she said, her eyes flicking up and down your form with a sneer. “Didn’t think you were still alive.”
You froze.
Her voice, so familiar and venom-laced, instantly pulled up old wounds. The gossip. The backstabbing. The way she’d spun lies about you with a smile and laughed behind your back like your pain was entertainment.
“I thought you disappeared,” she continued, crossing her arms. Her words were barbed, digging straight into the softest parts of you. The parts you’d tried to bury. The parts Heeseung had promised to protect. Your mouth opened, but no sound came out. Instead, your eyes darted—instinctively, desperately—searching the sidewalk, the street, the edges of every moving shadow.
And then..
He was there.
Like he had stepped out of thin air.
Heeseung appeared behind you, silent as a ghost. His arms slid around your waist with ease, grounding you, pulling you back against his chest in a gesture so certain, that your ex-friend’s expression flickered—first with confusion, then discomfort.
He didn’t say anything at first. Just stood there. Chest pressed firmly to your back. Hands resting over your stomach. And then his eyes met hers.
Glacial. Dangerous. Possessive.
Your ex-friend took a tiny step back.
“Is there a reason you’re talking to her?” he asked, quiet but cold.
She blinked, visibly thrown. “I—what?”
Heeseung’s arms didn’t loosen. If anything, they tightened. Protective. Possessive.
“Because from where I’m standing,” he said, his tone still calm, “it sounds like you’ve forgotten your place.”
You watched her stumble for a response, caught between outrage and unease.
“You don’t get to talk to her like that,” he said, voice laced with quiet venom. “Not anymore.”
Your ex-friend scoffed, eyes flicking from him to you. “Seriously? You letting him speak for you now?”
You didn’t answer. You didn’t need to. Because his fingers gently threaded through yours, grounding you. Reminding you that you didn’t have to speak. Not when he could protect you better than anyone ever had.
Heeseung looked down at you, brushing your hair gently behind your ear. “Let’s go,” he whispered, not even sparing the other girl another glance. “You don’t need to listen to people who never deserved you.”
And just like that, he led you away—arms wrapped around you, eyes scanning everything like a sentry. Because in his world, no one could hurt you. Not without consequences.
It didn’t happen all at once.
The illusion didn’t shatter like glass. It cracked like ice underfoot. Quiet. Slow. Barely noticeable… until you felt yourself slipping.
It started with the keys.
You were reaching for your spare set to grab something from the mailbox one morning, only to find the small bowl near the door empty. Confused, you checked the drawer. Then your bag. Nowhere. “Hey,” you asked gently, as Heeseung walked into the room, drying his hands on a towel, “Have you seen my keys?”
He didn’t look up right away. “You don’t need them,” he said easily, “I already got the mail.”
You hesitated. It wasn’t the first time. But now you were noticing. You didn’t press it.
Then came the phone.
You’d left it charging in the kitchen overnight, something you’d always done but one morning, you found it powered off, moved to a different table, and your passcode no longer worked. “Strange,” you muttered, trying again.
Heeseung’s voice came from the hallway. “Oh, the battery was acting weird. I reset it.”
“But my passcode—”
“I fixed that too. It’s the same as mine now. Easier to remember.” He smiled. “See? I’m just trying to help.”
You smiled back. Because it was Heeseung. Because he always helped. But something in your stomach twisted.
Then, there were the mirrors.
You hadn’t noticed right away, but you started to realize… there weren’t many left in the apartment. Your bedroom mirror had been removed. He claimed it cracked—bad luck. He hadn’t replaced it yet. The bathroom mirror had a towel draped over it “for cleaning.” The hallway mirror? Gone. You mentioned it once, half-laughing, “It’s like I barely see myself anymore.”
Heeseung had only smiled from the kitchen, voice light. “That’s okay. I see you enough for both of us.”
And then there was the voice in your head. The whisper that asked When was the last time you were alone?
When was the last time you left the apartment without him? Without checking in? Without that gentle, smiling permission?
You sat on the couch one evening, hands in your lap, heart beating a little too fast for no reason you could name. Heeseung sat beside you, arm around your shoulders, watching something on TV.
His thumb moved slowly over your upper arm. Back and forth. Reassuring.
But you didn’t feel settled.
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It was just supposed to be a quick note.
Heeseung had left for work only twenty minutes earlier, humming something soft as he kissed your cheek and told you he wouldn’t be long. You'd smiled, waved, locked the door behind him.
Now, you stood in the quiet apartment, rummaging through a drawer by the bookshelf in search of a pen. Your fingers brushed against something cold and unfamiliar. You paused. Reached in deeper.
A small, black external hard drive.
Not yours.
You turned it over in your hand, frowning. No label. No marks. Just a single red sticker near the port.
Heeseung’s? Maybe. But why was it in the drawer you never used?
Your curiosity prickled. Sitting at the desk, you plugged it into your laptop. The screen flickered briefly and the drive loaded.
No folders. Just one labeled in lowercase: “x”
Your stomach turned, but you double-clicked.
And then the screen filled with photos.
All of you.
You sleeping on the couch. You sitting on the balcony, reading. You cooking in the kitchen. Slightly grainy, like they'd been taken from a distance. Some were dated from weeks and months ago.
You closed the folder. Then opened it again. As if maybe the pictures would be different this time. As if maybe you’d see something innocent in them—some justification.
But they were still the same.
You—caught in private moments. You—unaware. And he had them saved. Labeled. Hidden.
Your stomach twisted, your skin crawling beneath your clothes.
But still… You didn’t move to delete them. You didn’t scream. Instead, you quietly dragged the folder closed and unplugged it.
You walked back to the drawer. And slowly, carefully—like it might explode if you breathed too hard—you put the hard drive exactly where you found it. Nestled between pens and rubber bands. The drawer slid closed with a soft click. Your hand hovered over it for a moment longer, frozen.
There had to be a reason. Right?
Heeseung wasn’t like those other people. He listened. He stayed. He never made you feel small. Maybe—maybe the pictures were just his way of feeling close. Maybe he started taking them before you were this close and didn’t know how to stop. Maybe he was just scared of losing you and—
You’re making excuses.
Your own thoughts cut through the haze like a blade. Sharp. Merciless.
But you shoved them down—deep, deep down—into that same quiet place where you’d buried every red flag, every whispered instinct you didn’t want to hear. Because it had to be okay. It had to be.
So when Heeseung walked through the door, you were already standing. The lights were warm. A soft song played from your phone like nothing had ever happened.
He looked up and smiled the second he saw you. “Hey, baby.”
That voice. That warmth. That easy calm that wrapped around you like a favorite blanket—so familiar, so practiced, so comforting. You smiled back. Too wide. Too still. But he didn’t seem to notice.
Or maybe he did. And pretended not to.
He stepped forward, pressing a kiss to your temple as he wrapped his arms around you. “Miss me?” he asked, nuzzling into your hair.
You let out a breathy laugh that didn’t quite reach your eyes. “Of course.” You tucked your arms around his waist like nothing had changed. Like you hadn’t just seen your entire life through the lens of someone else’s control. Like you hadn’t realized the warmth you clung to was built on silent watching and twisted love.
Because if it wasn’t okay— If all of this was wrong—
Then you’d have to leave. And you didn’t know who you’d be without him.
He held you tighter, and for a moment, the silence between you stretched. Just long enough to feel like he was listening for something in your breath. In your heartbeat.
Did he know?
Had he always known?
But he only kissed your cheek again. “Go sit down,” he said softly. “I’ll make you some tea.”
And you went. Because that was what you did now. What you were supposed to do.
Everything was fine. It had to be fine.
You sat quietly, legs curled beneath you on the couch, hands resting in your lap like you were waiting for direction—like you couldn’t move until he was back in the room.
Heeseung didn’t take long. He handed you the tea with both hands, his gaze never leaving your face.
No questions. No suspicion. Just that same gentle smile. That same calm presence.
As if nothing had changed.
You took the mug, fingers wrapped around the warmth like it was something solid to hold onto—like it could keep you grounded. “Thank you,” you murmured, voice even.
Heeseung didn’t answer. He just sat beside you, close enough that his shoulder pressed into yours, his thigh brushing yours—every point of contact anchoring. Controlling, without seeming like it.
Then, without a word, his hand came up. He brushed your hair back from your face, eyes scanning your features with something close to reverence. His fingers traced the curve of your cheek. Your jaw.
Like he was memorizing you all over again.
You forced a smile. A small one. And in return, he leaned in—pressing a soft kiss to your temple. Then another to your cheek. Another just beside your eye. “You’re so quiet tonight,” he murmured between kisses, but his tone was gentle. Not prying. Not accusatory.
Just warm. Intimate.
You nodded faintly, managing a quiet, “Just tired.”
His lips brushed against your skin again—this time near the corner of your mouth. “That’s okay,” he said, his hand now on your thigh. “Just stay with me.”
So you did. You let him pull you into his arms. Let your head rest against his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat.
And you told yourself—again and again—
It was okay. It had to be okay. Because if it wasn’t…
You didn’t know what you’d do.
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For once, you were alone.
Heeseung had left just after sunset, brushing a kiss to your forehead and murmuring something about “important business” with a tone that promised he’d explain later. He didn’t offer details—and you didn’t ask.
He said he’d be home late.
The silence he left behind pressed in from all corners of the apartment. At first, it felt like freedom. But after a few minutes… it didn’t. You paced. Flipped through shows without watching any of them. Scrolled on your phone, but everything felt dull, muted, meaningless without him sitting beside you—without his quiet commentary, without the casual touch of his hand resting on your leg like it belonged there. You hated the emptiness. The stillness. You hadn’t realized how completely you’d grown used to him filling the space.
Then—the craving hit.
Something sweet. Something salty. Something that would feel like comfort in your hands, on your tongue. A distraction. So, without thinking it through, you grabbed a hoodie and slipped on your shoes. No note. No message. Just air in your lungs and a late-night itch for something that reminded you of normalcy.
The 24-hour market was only a ten-minute walk away.
The streets were quiet. Empty, except for the soft hum of neon lights and the occasional car passing by. It felt strange being outside alone. Stranger still to realize how long it had been since you’d done it.
You kept your head down. One hand in your pocket, the other curled tightly around your phone—just in case.
When you reached the shop you grabbed chips, a drink, some candy. Something warm from the heater tray even though you weren’t sure if you were hungry or just… lonely.
You paid at the register with a faint smile, murmured a soft “thank you,” and tucked the snacks into your hoodie pouch and the small bag they handed you. The cashier didn’t look twice—just another late-night customer, just another quiet face passing through.
For once, everything felt… peaceful.
No tension pulling at your spine. No eyes following your every movement. No pressure to speak, to be still, to be watched. You stepped out into the quiet street, the warmth of the market replaced by the cool breeze of midnight air.
You were halfway home—barely two blocks from the apartment—when the first drop hit your cheek.
You looked up.
The clouds were heavy now, painted silver-blue under the streetlights. Another drop hit your shoulder. Then another.
Rain.
You gasped, pulling your hood up as you laughed softly to yourself, feet picking up pace. You hadn’t realized how much you’d missed the sensation of rain on your face.
You clutched your snack bag tighter and kept walking, hair dampening beneath your hood, shoes slipping just slightly on the slick sidewalk.
And for that one small moment. You felt like yourself again.
But just as your building came into view, lit by the soft glow of your porch light—
You paused.
Because through the misting rain, someone was limping toward you—unsteady, staggering, like their body was seconds from giving out.
At first, you couldn’t recognize them. Their hair clung to their face, and their clothes were torn, stained dark and slick with rain. Then they looked up. And screamed. A broken, hoarse sound, gurgled with panic and pain. They collapsed just a few feet from you, falling hard onto the sidewalk. You gasped and stumbled forward. “Wait—oh my God—” Your eyes widened in horror as you saw their face, barely visible through smeared blood but recognizable enough.
Her. Your ex-friend. The one who’d cornered you days ago. The one Heeseung had wrapped his arms around you in front of, like a shield made of silk and warning. She was barely conscious now, her lips trembling, trying to say something. Her hand reached for you. Clutching at your ankle. Blood pulsed from a wound at her side, soaking into the concrete, swirling red in the pooling rain. And that’s when you looked up and saw him.
The mask.
White. Expressionless. Flecked with blood.
Standing still at the end of the block like a ghost pulled out of memory, the very shape of your nightmares. The figure that had held you down, whispered to you, touched your skin like it was his to own.
Ghostface.
Your body locked in place, breath stolen from your lungs. He didn’t move. He didn’t need to. The sight of him alone rooted you to the spot—like a nightmare dragged into reality. Your breath fogged in the cold air as you slowly looked down again, heart hammering in your chest.
Your ex-friend’s hand had fallen limp against the sidewalk. Her eyes were half-lidded, staring at nothing. Her chest, once heaving with effort, had stilled. And then—just like that—she was gone.
You let out a choked gasp, stumbling back from her body.
No. No, no, no—
A scream ripped from your throat before you could stop it, raw and instinctive. The bag of snacks hit the ground with a splash as you turned and ran.
Rain soaked your hoodie. Your hair stuck to your face. Your lungs burned. But none of it mattered.
You just ran.
Down the street. Around the corner. Away from the body. Away from him.
Your mind raced faster than your feet, every thought loud and tangled.
She’s dead. He was there. He saw you. He watched you. He let you see him—
You didn’t look back. You couldn’t. Because something inside you whispered that if you did… you’d see him chasing after you.
Your feet pounded the pavement, soaked shoes slipping slightly on the rain-slicked ground. The cold air burned your lungs, but panic pushed you forward, faster, faster—until your legs ached and your vision blurred from more than just the downpour. You turned sharply into a side street, hoping—praying—for a place to hide. Something. Anything.
The alleyway was narrow, walled in with brick and stacked crates. Dimly lit. Empty. A dead end. Your heart dropped.
No fire escape. No open doors. No shadows deep enough to disappear into.
You spun on your heel, breath catching in your throat and froze.
He was there.
Standing silently at the entrance. Blocking the only way out. The white mask was soaked, stained, glinting faintly beneath the flickering alley light. His figure was still. Composed. And so very real.
You stumbled back, hitting the damp wall behind you, your hands searching wildly for something to grab, something to defend yourself—but there was nothing. Nothing but empty crates and rain pooling around your feet. “Stay away!” you shouted, voice cracking. “Don’t—please—just stay back!”
But he didn’t. Instead, he began walking toward you, slowly. Like he already knew there was nowhere for you to run.
You pressed further against the wall, your eyes wide, breath caught painfully in your throat. You followed his every movement, the slick black boots splashing through shallow puddles, the gloved hand still gripping the knife.
And then... He stopped. Right in front of you. Before you could scream or run or even think he dropped to his knees.
You froze. Your heart thundered, every nerve screaming that this wasn’t real—this didn’t make sense.
But then he reached up, slowly, and pulled the blood-streaked mask from his face.
Heeseung.
Your breath hitched as your vision spun for a moment.
No. No, it couldn’t be—
But it was.
There he was, kneeling in the rain like a man praying at an altar. His eyes locked on yours, wide. Raw. Desperate.
“Please…” he whispered, barely audible over the downpour. His hands reached out and grabbed the front of your hoodie, gripping it like it was the only thing anchoring him to the earth. “I didn’t want to scare you,” he said, his voice cracking. “I just—You don’t understand… You never saw what they did to you. You never saw how they looked at you. I was trying to protect you.”
You didn’t move. Couldn’t. Because everything inside you had suddenly gone quiet. Shocked still. You stared down at him, rain falling in heavy drops between you, soaking your clothes, your hair.
And Heeseung? He looked like he was about to break apart right there on the concrete. “Please don’t be afraid of me,” he whispered again. “I did it all for you.”
You opened your mouth to speak, but the words felt wrong. Like your voice didn’t belong to you. Like your thoughts couldn’t form fast enough to make sense of anything at all.
Heeseung’s grip on your hoodie tightened, knuckles white, rain dripping from his hair, from his lashes. His eyes never left your face, searching, pleading, trying to read something in you he could hold onto. “I had to,” he whispered, his voice hoarse, broken at the edges. “They hurt you. Every single one of them. Again and again.”
Your lips trembled, but still nothing came out.
“I watched you cry yourself to sleep more nights than I can count.” His eyes dropped to the ground for a breath, then rose again, brighter now, almost fevered. “They used you. Left you. Forgot you. But I never did. I never could.”
You took a shaky step back, but his hands didn’t let go—he followed the movement, still on his knees like a man in prayer. Desperate. Bound. “You’re the only good thing I’ve ever wanted,” he said, the rain making his voice rasp. “Don’t you get it? I didn’t take anything from you. I gave you peace. Safety. I made sure no one could ever hurt you again.”
The words slammed into you like cold water. Heavy. Smothering.
“You don’t have to be scared anymore,” he breathed. “You don’t have to fight for scraps. I’ll give you all of me. Everything you want.” His fingers loosened slightly, but only to slide down your sleeves, clutching your hands now instead, almost trembling. “I did it for you,” he said again, firmer now. “For love.”
And you just stood there. Soaking wet. Frozen. Held in the hands of someone who swear they love you enough to destroy everything else.
Snapping out of whatever trance you were stuck in, your hands pulled back from his like they burned. “No—” you breathed, finally forcing sound out of your throat. “I—I can’t—” Your voice cracked. The words stumbled over themselves. “I can’t think—I can’t—” You shook your head violently, backing up, stumbling over your own feet. “This isn’t love—this isn’t right!”
Heeseung’s face flickered—just for a second—like the sky itself cracked. But he didn’t move.
You decided then and there to run. You sprinted out of the alley like your body finally remembered how to run again, your breath ragged, your legs shaky beneath you. The rain slapped against your skin, but you barely felt it. You didn’t look back. You didn’t have to. Because he didn’t chase you.
Behind you, the street echoed with silence… until it didn’t.
A sound broke through the rain. Not footsteps. Not a shout.
Laughter.
Low at first. Then rising. A hollow, broken sound spilling from the alleyway like something unnatural.
Back there—on his knees, in the rain, face to the sky—Heeseung laughed. Like something inside him had finally snapped.
He crouched lower, curling in on himself, still laughing softly as the mask lay forgotten beside him. “I did it for you…” He whispered to the empty space where you’d once stood. To the shadows, to the night, to the part of you he still believed was his.
“All for you.”
You didn’t stop running until your apartment door slammed shut behind you.
Your fingers shook as you locked it—once, twice, three times—like the extra seconds would keep you safe. Like metal and bolts could hold back everything that had already gotten inside.
You collapsed to the floor, rainwater pooling beneath you. Tears blurred your vision. But for the first time in too long, your mind was clear.
You had to tell someone. And this time—you did.
Your voice trembled as you gave the report, but you didn’t stop. You told the dispatcher everything, the alleyway, the mask, the murders, the name.
“Heeseung. Lee Heeseung.”
They were quiet for only a second on the other end. Then came the response. “We’re dispatching a unit now.”
You didn’t sleep that night. You couldn’t. You sat curled on your couch, wrapped in a blanket you couldn’t feel, waiting for the phone to ring. For the sound of boots in the hallway. For something. But nothing came until the next morning.
You didn’t even mean to turn on the TV, your hands moved on autopilot.
And there he was.
Heeseung.
On the screen. Broadcast to the world. Surrounded by armed officers in heavy black gear. His wrists cuffed. Ankles chained. Expression unreadable as he was led down the courthouse steps in slow, measured steps.
The headline blared across the bottom of the screen in bold white text.
“LOCAL MAN CHARGED IN SERIES OF GRUESOME MURDERS — SUSPECT IDENTIFIED AS LEE HEESEUNG.”
Your breath caught when the camera zoomed in—closer, closer—until his face filled the frame. And then… he looked directly into the lens. Not by accident. His eyes found it like a target. And he stared. Dead. Unblinking. As if he were staring through the screen. At you. You froze. The mug in your hands slipped slightly, fingertips growing numb. It hit the table with a dull thunk, but you barely registered it.
The television screen shifted to inside the courtroom—clean, clinical, cold. Cameras weren’t allowed for the full trial, but now the final moments were being broadcast, the judge's voice calm but resolute as he read the sentence.
“Lee Heeseung. You have been found guilty on all counts—fifteen charges of premeditated murder, obstruction of justice, and illegal surveillance.”
You bit your thumbnail hard—so hard it hurt—but you couldn’t stop. Your legs curled tighter beneath you on the couch, the blanket long forgotten.
Fifteen. Fifteen victims. Fifteen names, fifteen lives.
The judge’s voice continued, steady and unwavering. “You are hereby sentenced to life in prison, without the possibility of parole.”
The camera cut to Heeseung being lifted from his chair. He didn’t resist. Didn’t speak. Didn’t blink. He just stared ahead. Emotionless. As if the weight of the sentence meant nothing. As if he expected it.
You leaned forward without realizing it, one hand still at your lips, eyes glued to the screen. You watched him being escorted out—four officers surrounding him, their grips tight on his arms, the heavy courtroom doors swinging open as he disappeared through them.
Just like that.
Gone.
Your heart thudded wildly in your chest, but you didn’t know if it was from relief or dread. Because while the world had just seen a monster locked away, you had seen the man who’d held your hand. Tucked you in. Whispered things that felt like comfort and turned out to be chains.
The room was suddenly so quiet, you could hear the blood rushing in your ears. And even as the broadcast faded into commentary and speculation, your gaze stayed on the now-empty frame.
You should’ve felt safe. Free.
But all you could think about was how he hadn’t looked angry. Or surprised. He’d looked calm. Like he still had something left to say.
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It took years.
Years of therapy. Of waking up in a cold sweat and reminding yourself he wasn’t there. Of flinching at shadows and double-checking every locked door. Of trying to silence the voice that whispered maybe he meant it when he said he loved you. So unlearning what he planted in you took time.
Heeseung had stripped away your independence like it was his right. Isolated you. Softened you into dependence, control masked as care. It had taken everything in you to crawl out of that. But you did.
You started small.
A new job. A new apartment that didn’t creak the same way at night. Learning how to walk home alone again.
You found people. Real people. Ones who asked how you were because they cared, not because they wanted something. Ones who didn’t push when you went quiet. Who stayed, without smothering you.
You made friends—actual friends.
And one day, you realized you’d gone a whole week without checking over your shoulder. Then a month. Then longer.
The panic didn’t disappear overnight, but it dulled. The scars didn’t vanish, but they stopped bleeding.
And eventually, you had something. A life. A future. Yourself. You were learning what it meant to be whole again. Life had finally started to feel normal again.
Your mornings were filled with soft sunlight through kitchen windows, the smell of coffee in the air, and music humming quietly from your phone while you got ready for the day. You didn’t jump at every sound anymore. You smiled more freely, laughed more often. You were blissful.
Until that morning.
You moved through your usual routine with ease—coffee in hand, toast in the other, a blanket draped over your shoulders as you flipped on the television.
Just background noise. Just something to fill the silence. But the silence didn’t stay silent for long.
Your breath hitched when the red headline scrolled across the bottom of the screen.
“BREAKING: Convicted serial killer Lee Heeseung, also known by his alias ‘Ghostface,’ has escaped from federal prison.”
Your mug slipped from your fingers and shattered on the kitchen floor. You didn’t even look down.You just stared.
The news anchor’s voice droned on above the rising heartbeat in your ears. “Authorities are currently investigating the circumstances of the escape. Lee Heeseung was serving a life sentence for the murders of fifteen confirmed victims. He is considered extremely dangerous. If seen, do not approach—immediately contact law enforcement.”
They showed a still image of him. An old one. One that had haunted your dreams. Blank expression. Dark eyes. Looking right through the camera—through the screen—at you.
Your chest tightened. Your throat went dry.
It couldn’t be real.
It couldn’t be.
But the image didn’t fade. The headline stayed.
And all at once, the warmth of the morning, the peace, the healing, vanished.
You took a deep breath. Then another.
It was fine.
He wouldn’t find you. You had moved across the country—changed your phone number, your address, everything. You kept your social media locked down, erased traces of the past like your life depended on it. Because once, it did.
He’d be caught again.
Right?
That was the thought you clung to as you swept up the broken mug in silence, tossed the shards in the trash, and changed into something clean for work.
You didn’t tell anyone. You never had. No one at your job knew your history. Not the late-night horrors. Not the way Heeseung once made you feel like his world was built around you—only to reveal you were in a cage he’d designed.
The less they knew, the safer they were. And you… you were a private person.
You walked into work like everything was normal. You smiled at the front desk. Clocked in. Answered emails. Laughed quietly at a coworker’s joke in the break room.
No one knew your hands were trembling beneath the desk. No one saw the way your eyes flicked to the door every time it opened.
You told yourself over and over. He won’t find me. He can’t. He’s not here.
But still, even surrounded by people, even in the middle of the day, you felt it. Like a shadow clinging to your spine. Like breath on the back of your neck. That faint, familiar dread that came before everything once went wrong. It settled in your chest like a weight.
You didn’t want to be here. Not this late. Not with the sky already graying, the thick clouds overhead promising rain. You wanted to be home, door locked, curtains drawn. Safe.
But your supervisor had been frantic—overworked, apologetic, but firm. “Please—just a few more files. I’ll owe you one, seriously.”
And like the reliable employee you were, you offered a small, tense smile and nodded. “Sure. I’ll take care of it.”
Because maybe, if you worked faster, got through it all without distraction, you could leave before the worst of the storm rolled in.
You kept glancing at the clock. Every ten minutes. Then every five.
The office slowly emptied. Chairs pushed in. Lights flicked off. Quiet goodbyes hummed around you.
And eventually, you were alone.
You forced your eyes to stay on the screen. Pushed through the work as quickly as you could. Every so often, the lights flickered slightly—old wiring, probably. The kind that always seemed louder when the room was empty.
The clock read 10:12 p.m. You were almost done. Just a little more, and you could finally leave. You rubbed your eyes, blinking away the blur from staring too long at the screen. The office was silent except for the tapping of your keyboard and the low, steady whir of the building’s old HVAC system.
Buzz.
Your phone vibrated against the desk, the sudden noise slicing through the quiet like a knife. You jumped slightly, a chill crawling up your spine as you reached for it.
One new message.
Unknown Number.
And your heart stopped as you read the words.
“Did you miss me, baby?”
Your hand trembled as you slowly lowered the phone.
No. No, no, no—this couldn’t be real. It was a trick. A coincidence. A cruel joke. It had to be.
You hadn’t told anyone. You’d erased everything. You’d buried that part of your life so deep even you barely looked at it anymore. But those words.. Even in text, they pulled something old and cold from the pit of your stomach. Like a door creaking open in the back of your mind that you'd nailed shut years ago. The part of you that still remembered how he used to speak to you. How easily his voice could sound like a promise and a threat at once.
Buzz.
Another message. You didn’t want to look—but your hand moved on its own.
“Ready to come back to me, baby?” “You were so naughty to get me tattle.” “But it’s okay. I’ll pay you back… for all those years I spent behind those bars.”
Your throat tightened. You could barely swallow. The lights in the office flickered again. A hum in the vents above you, like the building itself was holding its breath.
No.
You shook your head, fingers clutching the edge of the desk. This wasn’t happening. It couldn’t be happening. He was taunting you. He wanted you to panic. And you were not going to fall apart.
But your vision blurred, and your chest felt like it was collapsing inward. That familiar feeling, the one where the room feels too small, and every shadow feels like it’s watching you.
You stood up too fast. Your chair scraped loudly against the tile, echoing down the empty corridor, you felt sick, your stomach twisted violently. You didn’t know if it was fear or nausea or both, but suddenly the only thing you could think about was the bathroom.
Somewhere to breathe. To get away. To throw up, anything to feel in control again.
You stumbled down the hall, shoes slipping slightly on the polished floor. The world felt off-kilter, tilting around you with every step. Your breath was too loud in your ears. Your hands wouldn’t stop shaking.
You pushed the door to the bathroom open with trembling fingers.
And stopped.
Cold.
Right there, on the mirror above the sinks..
Red. Dripping. Smeared with clear, deliberate strokes.
“No one can love you like I.”
The room tilted and for a second, you didn’t know if your knees would hold, and they didnt, you stumbled back a step, your shoulder hitting the doorframe.
It wasn’t paint. You didn’t need to be close to know that. You knew the color. The thickness. The faint, coppery scent already hanging in the air. And worst of all, you knew the handwriting.
You turned on your heel and bolted from the bathroom, shoes slipping slightly on the tile, breath tight in your throat. You ran through the quiet halls, through the glass doors, and into the storm.
The rain hit your skin like needles, soaking you within seconds—but you didn’t stop. You sprinted across the empty lot, and yanked open the driver’s side door of your car. You threw yourself inside, heart pounding so hard it felt like it was trying to escape your chest.
Your hands fumbled blindly for your keys. Panic made your vision blur. Come on, come on—where were they?
Knock.
Right by your head.
Your breath caught mid-gasp as your gaze snapped to the window beside you.
A man. Standing still. Soaked hood pulled low over his face, water dripping from his sleeves.
You were already paranoid. Already spiraling. Maybe it was just a stranger. Someone needing help. Someone lost. You told yourself it was fine. Just some random guy.
But then he lifted a hand. Pressed it to the fogged glass.
And slowly...
He breathed out.
The condensation spread across the window. And with one finger, he began to write.
"XO"
Your body froze.
No.No, no, no—
Your fingers went numb.
And then, he slowly pulled back the hood.
It was Heeseung.
Soaked in rain. Hair plastered to his forehead. That same, unreadable look in his eyes.
Like he never left. Like he never would.
And through the glass, he smiled.
Your scream tore through the storm as the car door suddenly yanked open.
You barely had time to react before he was inside, soaked from head to toe, eyes wild even in the dark. “Oh, baby…” he said, his voice low, like he was seeing a ghost he’d missed for years. “I’ve missed you so much.”
You scrambled back across the seat, trying to put space between you, but the car wasn’t big enough. Nowhere near far enough.
He climbed in after you slowly, like he had all the time in the world. “You don’t know how awful prison was,” he murmured, closing the door behind him. “All those days… nights… and not a single one with you.” His presence filled the car. The scent of rain and metal clung to him. Your breath hitched as your back hit the opposite door.
He reached out, not fast, not forceful but like it was natural. Like this was how it was always supposed to be.
You jerked your leg away as his hand grazed your ankle. “Don’t—” you gasped, shaking.
But he tilted his head, eyes soft and strange. “Why are you scared?” he whispered. “I’m here now. Everything’s okay.”
You could feel the panic bubbling in your throat. “You’re not supposed to be here,” you said, voice cracking. “You’re not supposed to find me again.”
Heeseung blinked, as if confused by the very idea. And then he smiled, gently, like he was somewhere else entirely. “But I did find you again.”
You swallowed hard, every part of you tense as you tried not to show how your fingers had slowly moved behind your back, toward the door handle. Just a flick. That’s all you needed. Just a second to slip out.
But Heeseung kept talking, eyes locked on you like you were the center of his world. “You can never escape me,” he whispered. “Not my love. Not what we are.” His voice was soft, like a lullaby laced with something beneath. “Every day in there, I thought about you. You made me strong.” He leaned closer, his voice lowering even more. “Strong enough to take over everything. Strong enough to come back to you.”
Your fingers reached the lock. Quiet. Careful.
Click.
Too loud.
Heeseung’s eyes darted to the sound in an instant. And he giggled. Soft, amused. Like a secret had just been told. Then he reached out and, without force, just pulled you closer. As if it were a dance you’d both already agreed to. “I learned so many fun things in prison, baby,” he whispered, nose brushing too close. “I can’t wait to try them all with you.”
You froze.
“But not here.” He looked out the rain-streaked window, expression calm, almost dreamy. “First, we need to go somewhere quiet. Somewhere no one will disturb us.... Just you and me again. Like it was always supposed to be.” Heeseung turned his gaze back to you, eyes unreadable but locked in place like a magnet. “But first…” he murmured, voice dropping lower. “I need a taste.”
Your breath hitched, confusion and panic colliding in your chest as his hand snapped forward, fingers gripping the back of your neck.
Too fast. Too close.
And suddenly, his face was inches from yours, his lips pressed against yours in a way that wasn't tender, it was possessive. Heavy. Wrong.
Your whole body went stiff, frozen in shock. It didn’t feel like affection. It felt like control. You pulled back instinctively, your hands pushing at his chest as your voice cracked, “Stop—don’t!”
Heeseung paused. His grip loosened only slightly as he stared at you, his expression flickering between hurt and obsession. “You always fight it at first,” he said quietly, like it was a memory instead of a moment. “But you’ll remember that you always come back to me in the end.”
The rain beat down harder outside, the storm muffling the sound of your heartbeat as it thundered in your ears. You twisted in your seat, eyes searching the street through the fogged-up windows.
You needed to run. You needed help. Now.
Your mind was racing with how to get out, what to do, what to say but then you felt it. Something cold. Pressed gently, barely touching the base of your throat. Every inch of your body went rigid as your breath caught in your chest.
Heeseung’s expression changed. Gone was the soft smile, replaced by something colder. Disappointed. Almost… tired. “Seems like all the progress we made’s gone,” he muttered under his breath, shaking his head slightly. “Years away, and you’ve forgotten everything.” His eyes flicked up to yours, unreadable. “But that’s okay, baby,” he added, voice lighter. “Breaking you down again? That’ll be easy.”
You stared at him, barely blinking, barely breathing. Before you could say anything—before you could even flinch—he leaned forward again. His hands were firm, his presence overwhelming as his lips pressed against yours in a way that was too familiar. You froze, body stiff, mind racing. You didn’t kiss him back—but you didn’t fight him, either. Because of the cold press of metal still hovered at your throat. And in that moment, any resistance felt like a risk you couldn’t afford.
Your eyes squeezed shut as tears slipped down your cheeks—silent, hot. Your fingers trembled at your sides. But it wasn’t just fear rushing through you. It was everything.
The memories. The manipulation. The twisted safety he’d once wrapped you in like a blanket. And underneath it all, something you hated—something deep, buried, long ignored—whispered.
He’s back. He came back for you. He always meant it when he said you were his.
You swallowed down the sob rising in your throat.
He pulled back just enough to look at you. His hand remained hovering near your face, steady, like he still had control—like he always would. “Always so beautiful…” he whispered. “Baby, you are everything to me. And I’ll ruin everyone else who tries to take you away.”
The words twisted something deep inside you. Not just fear. Not just revulsion. But heartbreak. Because no matter how far you’d run, your past had caught up to you. All the trauma you’d buried, the emotions you bottled up, the twisted sense of comfort you once felt in his presence.
It all returned.
You didn’t even realize you were gripping his hoodie until your knuckles turned white. Holding onto him—not because you wanted to, but because you didn’t know what else to do. You were frozen. Trapped in the gravity of something that once felt like safety. “You’re f—fucking insane, Heeseung,” you choked out, your voice shaking.
But he just smiled, like you’d said something sweet. “Ah, ah,” he tutted gently, pressing a finger under your chin. “I’m insane for you, baby. Always have been.”
And then he kissed you again.
Quick. Possessive. Like he believed that if he reminded you of the past, it would pull you back into his orbit.
You didn’t kiss him back.
But for a second, he believed you might.
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a/n: yeah no, i hate it. This sucks ass
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delulumel ¡ 25 days ago
Text
OFF THE ICE s.jy
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synopsis ⤑ You were having fun. That’s all. You were young, in college, readying yourself for true adulthood. You didn’t know adulthood would come so quick, in the form of a baby you didn’t plan for. With a man who was more in love with Hockey than anything else. This wasn’t supposed to happen, and it definitely wasn’t supposed to happen with him.
pairings ⤑ hockey player!Jake x pregnant!reader word count ⤑ 18k
warnings ⤑ pregnancy trope, smut, friends with benefits, angst , depictions of hockey injuries , probably more
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Two pink lines. 
They stare back at you, unwavering. Bold. Permanent. 
Your breath catches in your throat. A dull roaring fills your ears, like the moment before a crash, when you see the impact coming but there’s nothing you can do to stop it. You blink once, twice, waiting for the second line to disappear, for reality to snap back into place. It doesn’t. It stays. Pregnant. A hollow, sinking feeling settles in your stomach. No. No, no, no. This can’t be real. Your fingers tighten around the plastic stick, your knuckles aching from the grip. You were careful. You were always careful. Birth control, condoms, every precaution. You did everything right. So how the hell did this happen? 
You shake your head, your breathing ragged. Maybe it’s a mistake. Maybe the test is faulty. They mess up sometimes, right? You should take another one. Five more. Ten. You should drive to the store right now and buy every test on the shelf, because this? This can’t be happening. Your legs feel unsteady beneath you as you sink onto the closed toilet lid, one hand gripping the edge of the sink to ground yourself. 
Jake. His name crashes through your thoughts, and a fresh wave of nausea rises up in your throat. Oh my god. There’s only one person it could be. Jake. Your friend. Your friend with benefits. You squeeze your eyes shut, pressing the heels of your palms against them. Your mind flickers through the memories—late nights tangled in sheets, whispered jokes between kisses, the unspoken agreement that this wasn’t supposed to mean anything. It was fun. Easy. No strings attached. Except now, there are strings. Big, life-altering, impossible-to-ignore strings. 
Your stomach lurches. You press a hand to it instinctively, but it’s still just you. Just your body, your life—except it’s not just yours anymore, is it? A shuddering breath leaves you, and suddenly, you feel so, so small. What are you supposed to do? You’re in your second year of college. You have plans, dreams, a future that doesn’t include cribs and lullabies and tiny fingers clutching at yours. You can’t be a mother. Not now. Maybe not ever. And Jake? 
Jake has hockey. The game is his whole world—the early-morning practices, the late-night workouts, the way his eyes light up when he steps onto the ice. He has a career to chase, a future that doesn’t include this. 
This will ruin everything. Tears burn at the edges of your vision, but you blink them away. You can’t cry. Not yet. Not until you’re sure, not until you go to the doctor and they tell you this is all some cruel mistake. Because if it’s not… You swallow hard, gripping the test so tightly it feels like it might snap in half. You can’t tell him. Not yet. Maybe not ever. If you don’t say it out loud, if you don’t give it weight, maybe it won’t be real. Maybe you can find a way to make this all go away. But deep down, beneath the panic, beneath the sheer, suffocating terror— You already know. This is real. And there’s no undoing it. 
Your breath shudders as you stare at the test, the past clawing its way back to you. You’re racking your brain trying to find when the two of you went wrong, when you stopped being careful. You know exactly how. The memory slams into you, sharp and unforgiving—that night. 
Two months ago. 
The house was packed. Bodies pressed together, the air thick with heat and sweat and the sharp bite of liquor. Music pounded through the speakers, rattling the walls, the bass thrumming through your chest. The whole hockey team was celebrating their win, and Jake was at the center of it all, grinning like he owned the night. Heeseung had won it all, again. Except he was too busy pulling his girlfriend into a random room to really celebrate much. 
You weren’t even supposed to be here—you had a paper due, an exam creeping up—but when Jake texted “Where are you? We won. Get your ass over here,” you rolled your eyes, threw on something half-decent, and showed up anyway. And now you were here. Back pressed against a bathroom door, your fingers tangled in Jake’s hoodie, his mouth hot against yours. A breathless laugh escaped you between kisses, the alcohol buzzing pleasantly in your veins. “I just came to say congrats.” 
Jake grinned against your lips. “This is how you say congrats?” You smirked. “I was gonna buy you a beer, but—” 
His hands slid down your sides, rough and familiar, pulling you flush against him. “This is better.” And god, it was. You had always liked this about Jake—how easy it was, how uncomplicated. No messy feelings, no awkward expectations. Just heat, just want, just the press of his body against yours as he backed you up against the bathroom sink. Your fingers curled into his shirt, tugging it up, your mouths moving together in that frantic, greedy way they always did when neither of you could be bothered to make it back to one of your apartments. 
“Quickie?” you breathed against his lips, teasing. Jake groaned, already fumbling with your jeans. “Fuck, yeah.” It was fast. Dizzying. His hands were everywhere, pushing, pulling, unzipping. Your back hit the counter, your fingers in his hair, his mouth tracing fire along your throat. Your skin was hot, your pulse erratic, and nothing else mattered—not the party raging outside the door, not the alcohol humming through your system, not the fact that you weren’t exactly thinking. 
It wasn’t until he was pressed against you, skin to skin, that something in the back of your mind lurched. You blinked up at him, breathless. “Wait—do you have a—” 
Jake cursed under his breath. “Shit. No. I didn’t—” He moved like he was about to pull back, but god, you wanted him. The ache was unbearable, your body screaming at you to just— “It’s fine,” you whispered. You’re on the pill. It’s just one time. Jake hesitated, his hands gripping your waist like he was giving himself a second to think, but then your mouth was on his again, and whatever sliver of self-restraint he had vanished. 
With one delicious roll of his hips against yours he was a goner. “Holy- f-fuck.” Jake hissed, his mouth agape and eyes heavy lidded as he looked down at where the two of you were perfectly intertwined. “Fuck. Fuck.” 
“How’s that feeling, champion?” You purred in his ear, your hands playing in his hair as he continued his assault on your pussy. 
“Such a pretty pussy..” Jake groaned. His grip on your thighs was almost bruising but you didn't care, you welcomed the pain. Your head leaned back, hitting the mirror as moans fell from your lips like a mantra. Jake’s lips found the column of your neck sucking and biting at the skin. “You like that, baby?” 
“Uh-huh” You nodded your head finding it hard to find the ability to speak when Jake was doing unspeakable things to you. Jake’s thrusts were starting to become frantic, his moans higher and more frequent as it became apparent he was closer and closer to the edge. The music outside the door thumped, sounds of muffled voices passing by the door fell on deaf ears. You were too wrapped up in the way Jake was making you feel, coupled with the buzz of alcohol flowing through your veins. It was almost euphoric when your orgasm hit. Your legs shaking in Jake’s grip. 
“God-” Jake breathed. Your orgasm served as a catalyst for his own. His hips slamming against yours with finality. It was reckless. It was careless. It was just once. Except once was enough. 
Present day. 
Your stomach lurches. You squeeze your eyes shut, willing the memory away, willing yourself back into the safety of denial. But it’s useless. The test is still in your hands. The two pink lines are still staring back at you. And no matter how much you wish you could undo it— You can’t. 
Your hands are still trembling. Your fingers ache from how hard you’re clutching the test, but you can’t let go. If you set it down, if you let it slip from your grasp, that means you’re accepting it. That means this is real.A choked sound slips past your lips before you can stop it. Your vision blurs. Then it happens—you break. 
A sob rips through your chest, raw and unrestrained. You fold in on yourself, pressing a hand over your mouth to smother the sounds, but it doesn’t stop the tears from coming. They fall in hot, messy streaks, slipping down your cheeks, soaking into your shirt. Your whole body shakes with it, shoulders curled forward, knees pulled up as if making yourself smaller might make this moment disappear. But nothing disappears. Nothing changes. You’re still here. Still alone in this room. Still pregnant. 
The word echoes inside your skull, over and over, until it drowns out everything else. Pregnant. Pregnant. Pregnant. The panic tightens around your ribs like a vice, and suddenly, you can’t breathe. You gasp, swallowing down air, trying to steady yourself, but it’s like you’re stuck underwater. Like you’re drowning. You don’t know how long you sit there—minutes? Hours? Time blurs, slipping through your fingers like sand. All you know is that you can’t do this. 
You can’t be pregnant. You can’t be a mom. You can’t tell Jake. A fresh wave of nausea churns in your stomach at the thought of him. Of his reaction. Of what this will do to him. To you. Jake, with his whole future mapped out in skates and ice and championships. Jake, who has never even hinted at wanting something serious with you—because this wasn’t supposed to mean anything. Because it never has. And now, you’re carrying something that means everything. You squeeze your eyes shut, pressing the heels of your hands against them. If you don’t see the test, if you don’t look at it, maybe—maybe—No.
You inhale sharply, forcing your mind through the fog of panic. There’s only one thing you can do right now. Only one thing that makes sense. Before you tell Jake—before you even let yourself fully believe this—you need to be sure. A pregnancy test is just plastic and dye. It could be wrong. It could be wrong. A doctor. You need a doctor. 
The thought latches onto you like a lifeline. If you go to the doctor and they tell you this is a mistake—if they tell you that somehow, someway, those pink lines don’t mean what you think they mean—then you can pretend this moment never happened. You can wipe it from existence. You have to know. Your phone is on your nightstand, facedown, dark. You force yourself to move, to function. Your limbs feel heavy, weighed down by exhaustion and fear and the sheer impossibility of what’s happening, but somehow, you grab it. Your fingers are still shaking when you pull up the campus clinic’s number. 
You hesitate. Your thumb hovers over the call button, the moment stretching out in front of you. Because if you make this appointment—if you hear a doctor say the words out loud— Then it’s real. And once it’s real, you can never go back. A single tear drips onto the phone screen, smudging the numbers. You close your eyes. And you press call. 
The next day feels like a fever dream. You go through the motions, pretending your world hasn’t tilted off its axis. But every breath, every step, every blink reminds you that something is different. That there’s something inside you—growing, forming, changing everything. You haven’t said a word to anyone. 
Yuna had texted this morning to let you know she was crashing at her friend’s place again. You almost told her. You almost begged her to come home, to sit with you, to make you feel like you weren’t completely alone in this—but you couldn’t do it. Not yet. Not until the doctor confirms what you already know deep in your bones. So, you’ve spent the entire day in silence. Sitting with this information like a stone in your gut, waiting for the inevitable unraveling. 
You didn’t sleep last night. Every time you closed your eyes, the thoughts crept in—images of Jake, of your future, of what this means for the rest of your life. Of every possibility, every terrible outcome. You’ve always thought of pregnancy as some far-off, abstract concept—something that happened to other people, to people who were ready, to people who wanted it. But not you. Never you. 
And now, in just a few hours, you’ll be lying on an exam table, hearing a doctor tell you how far along you are. How long ago your life changed without you even knowing. The thought makes your stomach twist, nausea curling in your throat. You’re so lost in your thoughts that when your phone rings, the sudden sound makes you jump. It’s Jake. Your heart stops. His name flashes on the screen, bold and unmistakable, and for a second, you consider letting it ring. But that’s suspicious. You never ignore Jake’s calls. That would only make him ask questions.
So, you force yourself to breathe, force yourself to steady your voice, and answer. “Hey.” 
“Hey,” he echoes, his voice easy, warm. There’s the faint sound of voices and clattering sticks in the background, and you picture him in the locker room, probably shoving his gear into his bag while talking to you. The image is so painfully normal that it makes your chest ache. “What are you up to tonight?” he asks, casual, unaware of the chaos inside you. “Practice should be done around eight. You wanna come over?” 
Your grip tightens around the phone. It’s a simple question. A question you’ve answered a hundred times before with some variation of yeah, sure or your place or mine? But tonight, everything is different, and Jake has no idea. You swallow hard, throat dry. “I—I can’t.” 
He pauses. “Why not?” Because in less than two hours, I’ll be staring at an ultrasound screen, listening to a doctor tell me how many weeks pregnant I am. Because I don’t know how to look you in the eye, knowing that inside me—inside us—something is changing, something we never planned for, never wanted. “I'm sick,” you say instead. It’s a rushed excuse, flimsy and weak. “I think I caught something.” 
Jake hums, like he doesn’t quite buy it but isn’t ready to push. “You okay?” No. Not even close. 
“Yeah,” you lie. “Just tired. I think I just need to sleep it off.” Another pause. You know Jake well enough to know he’s debating whether or not to call you out. But finally, he just sighs. “Alright. Let me know if you need anything.” 
His voice is so normal. So Jake. And for a moment, you almost break. You almost say, Actually, there is something I need. I need you to know. I need you to tell me what the hell we’re supposed to do now. I need you to promise that I’m not in this alone. But the words don’t come. Instead, you rush out, “I gotta go,” before he can say anything else. You don’t wait for his response. You hang up, your hand shaking as you set your phone facedown beside you. 
The room is too quiet again. Your heart is pounding, adrenaline making your whole body feel light and untethered. You can’t keep doing this. You can’t keep pretending you’re fine when everything inside you is breaking apart. And yet, that’s exactly what you do. You wipe at your face, stand up, and grab your coat. The appointment is waiting. And whether you’re ready or not— You’re about to find out exactly how much time you have left before you have to tell Jake the truth. 
The air outside is sharp, biting against your skin as you step out of your dorm. It’s early evening, but the sky is already dark, winter pressing its cold fingers into everything it touches. Streetlights flicker to life, their glow hazy against the fog of your breath as you exhale, pulling your coat tighter around yourself. The clinic isn’t far. Just a short walk across campus. Still, every step feels heavier than the last. 
Your stomach churns with nerves, your hands stuffed deep in your pockets to hide their trembling. The closer you get, the more the reality of what you’re about to do sinks in. There’s no turning back after this. Once the doctor confirms it—once they tell you exactly how far along you are—you’ll have no choice but to face this head-on. No more pretending. No more hoping the test was wrong. You wish Yuna were here. You wish someone was here. 
But instead, you walk into the clinic alone, head ducked, shoulders curled in like you can make yourself disappear. The receptionist barely looks up as you check in, only nodding before motioning toward the chairs in the waiting area. You sit. The room smells like antiseptic and old magazines, too-bright lights buzzing overhead. Your legs bounce restlessly, fingers twisting in your lap. The other people waiting don’t even spare you a glance, but you still feel exposed, like someone could look at you and just know. Your name is called. 
Your body moves on autopilot, following the nurse down the hall, into a room. She asks questions. You answer without really hearing yourself, your voice robotic, like you’re reciting lines for a role you never wanted. Then the real part begins. You lie back on the table, cold gel spread across your stomach. The machine hums to life, and your heart pounds. You don’t know if you want to look. You don’t know if you can. But then the doctor says, “There it is.” And you do. You look. 
The screen is grainy, shifting black and white, impossible to make sense of at first. Then she moves the wand, adjusting the angle, and— Your breath catches. A tiny flicker. Your whole body freezes. “That’s the heartbeat,” the doctor says softly. “Would you like to hear it?” 
Your throat is too tight to answer. You don’t know what you expected, but not this. Not something so small, so fragile, so real. You nod. And then—sound. A rapid, steady rhythm, impossibly fast but undeniably there. Your vision blurs, and it takes you a second to realize you’re crying. 
Because this isn’t just a concept anymore. This isn’t just two pink lines or a mistake or a problem you don’t know how to solve. This is real. And whether you’re ready or not, this is happening. The doctor speaks again, gentle but firm. “You’re about seven weeks along.” 
Seven weeks. You squeeze your eyes shut. Because now there’s a heartbeat. Now there’s a timeline. Now there’s no way out of this moment, no way to pretend it hasn’t already changed you. You leave the clinic with a small printout in your hands, the black-and-white ultrasound photo pressed between your fingers. You don’t even know why you took it. Maybe because part of you knows that after tonight, everything is going to change. And Jake still has no idea. 
Back in the dorm you're still alone, Yuna not having come back yet. You were grateful for that as you just needed the time alone to process. Your phone buzzes. You flinch at the sudden vibration, your fingers tightening around the ultrasound printout still resting in your lap. It takes a second for you to move, to blink, to tear your gaze away from the tiny, grainy image on the paper. Another buzz. Your stomach twists. 
Slowly, like you already know what you’ll see, you reach for your phone and tilt the screen toward you. 
Jake: You feeling any better? 
You stare at the message, your pulse hammering in your throat. A third buzz. 
Jake: Practice just ended. Thinking about you. 
You suck in a sharp breath, a lump forming in your throat so quickly it nearly chokes you. Thinking about you. He doesn’t even realize what those words do to you right now, how they cut straight through your ribs, cracking something open inside you. You can picture him perfectly—his damp hair, his flushed cheeks, the easy way he leans against his locker while texting you, probably half-distracted, expecting you to reply with something simple. Something normal. But nothing is normal. Not anymore. The screen glares up at you, demanding an answer, but your fingers won’t move. 
What could you even say? Actually, I’m in my dorm having just left the doctor, staring at an ultrasound of the baby I never meant to have with you. But don’t worry, I’ll get back to you when I figure out how the hell to tell you. Another buzz. This time, it’s a call and you panic. Your heart slams against your ribs, and before you can stop yourself, you flip the phone over, screen-down, silencing it. The call cuts off. A few seconds later, another text comes through. 
Jake: You good? 
Your breathing is uneven. Your hands are shaking. You can’t do this. Not right now. You toss your phone away on the bed, like that will somehow make it all go away. Like that will somehow delay the inevitable. But you know it won’t you have to tell him soon, or it will eat you alive. 
For the next few hours you sit in silence, still not having left the dorm. The room is quiet, save for the faint ticking of the clock above your desk.  You’re curled up beneath your blankets, exhaustion pressing down on you like a weight. You hadn’t meant to fall asleep after getting back from the clinic, but your body had other plans. It wasn’t restful, though. Even in sleep, your mind wouldn’t stop spinning, replaying the sound of that tiny heartbeat over and over and over again. 
Suddenly a soft click of the door was heard. You stir, blinking blearily as the light flicks on. “Hey, are you awake?” Yuna’s voice is gentle, cautious. You push yourself up, rubbing at your eyes as you watch her drop her bag by the door. She looks guilty. “I’m sorry for being gone so long,” she says, brushing a hand through her dark hair. “Our study session ran late, and we figured, why not just turn it into a sleepover? I should’ve texted you more. I feel bad.” 
You shake your head, forcing a small, tired smile. “It’s fine. You don’t have to check in with me every second.” Yuna eyes you for a beat, like she’s trying to gauge if you really mean it. Then she sighs, kicking off her shoes before flopping onto the bed beside you. “I missed anything exciting?” Yes. No. everything. 
You swallow, shaking your head again. “Not really.” Yuna shifts, turning onto her side to face you. Then, her brows furrow. Her eyes scan your face, tracing the dark circles beneath your eyes, the tension in your jaw, the way you keep fidgeting with the edge of your blanket. “Okay, what’s wrong?” she asks, blunt as ever. 
Your heart stutters. “What? Nothing’s wrong.” 
Yuna doesn’t buy it for a second. She gives you a look, her sharp, knowing gaze cutting right through your weak attempt at indifference. “Don’t lie to me.” You open your mouth—ready to deny, to deflect, to do anything but tell the truth—but something inside you breaks. The weight of it all, the sheer impossibility of holding it in any longer, crushes you. You don’t say a word. You just reach under your pillow, where the crumpled ultrasound printout is still hidden, and pull it out with trembling fingers. 
Then, without looking at her, you hold it out. Yuna blinks, confused for a second—until she takes the paper from your hand and sees. Her entire body goes still. Silence. She stares down at the black-and-white image, her lips parting slightly. Her throat works like she wants to say something, but no words come out. Seconds stretch, heavy and suffocating. 
Finally, she looks at you. Her voice is quiet, but sharp with shock. “Is this…?” You nod, your chest tight. Yuna inhales sharply. “Holy shit.” She sits up straighter, like the weight of the moment is finally hitting her. She looks at the ultrasound again, like if she stares long enough, it’ll make sense. Then, eyes wide—voice barely above a whisper—she asks, “…It’s Jake’s? Right?” You let out a dry, humorless laugh, wiping at your face. “Of course, it is.” 
She looks up at you, eyes still wide with shock. “He’s the only one I’ve been with in a year,” you add quietly, voice almost getting lost in the space between you. Yuna swallows, nodding slowly, like she’s just now processing how real this is. Like she’s flipping through all the memories she has of you and Jake—of the nights you’d leave your dorm with a smirk and come back in one of his hoodies, of the way you never quite called him your boyfriend, of the way he was always just there. Her gaze sharpens. “How did he take it?” 
Your stomach twists. You hesitate just a second too long. Yuna’s face drops. “Oh my god.” She leans forward. “You didn’t tell him?” 
You squeeze your eyes shut, inhaling deeply before shaking your head. Yuna groans, throwing her head back against the headboard. “You have got to be kidding me.” 
“Yuna—” 
“No.” She sits up straight again, looking at you with something between exasperation and concern. “You have to tell him.” 
“I know,” you say, voice tight. “I just—” 
“No,” she interrupts. “Not later, not eventually—you need to tell him now.” You shake your head quickly, wrapping your arms around yourself. Your whole body feels cold, like the weight of this conversation is seeping into your bones. “You don’t get it,” you say, your voice almost breaking. “Jake loves hockey. More than anything. More than school, more than his own goddamn life sometimes.” You sniffle, shaking your head again. “If I tell him this, he’ll—” You stop, choking on the words. 
He’ll what? Walk away? Shut down? Look at you like you’ve just ruined his entire world? You don’t even know. That’s the problem. Yuna softens. She reaches out, placing a warm hand over yours. “Jake is a good guy,” she says gently. “He would never do that to you.” You stare down at your lap, at your fingers twisting in your hoodie sleeves. She says it like it's a fact. Like there’s no question, no possibility of anything else. But she doesn’t know what you know. 
She doesn’t know how much Jake lives for the game, how hockey is the thing that keeps his blood pumping, how he lights up when he talks about it in a way he never has about anything—or anyone—else. She doesn’t know that you’re terrified. Because if you tell Jake, if you say the words out loud— it’s real and it’s scary. 
The tears come fast. Faster than you expect. One second, you’re staring at your lap, chest too tight to breathe. The next, your vision is blurring, and your shoulders shake, and a broken sound rips from your throat before you can stop it. Yuna reacts instantly. “Hey—hey, no, don’t cry,” she says, shifting closer. Her arms wrap around you before you even realize what’s happening, pulling you into the warmth of her embrace. “I got you. It’s okay.” but it’s not okay. Nothing about this is okay. You bury your face into her shoulder, gripping the fabric of her sweatshirt like it’s the only thing tethering you to the earth. She doesn’t let go, just rubs circles into your back as you fall apart. 
“I—I don’t know what to do,” you admit, voice muffled. “I’m so scared, Yuna.” She sighs, resting her chin atop your head. “I know.” A fresh wave of tears spills over. You wish you didn’t feel like this. Wish you could be stronger, steadier, more in control. But right now, you’re none of those things. Right now, you’re just a girl who made a mistake and is staring down the consequences. Yuna squeezes you a little tighter. “Listen, whatever happens, you won’t be alone in this, okay? You have me. And when you tell Jake, you’ll have him too. And even if—even if he’s an idiot about it at first, I’ll kick his ass into shape.” That actually makes you let out a weak, teary laugh. 
Yuna gasps, dramatic as always. “Did you just laugh? Oh my god, it’s a miracle.” You sniffle. “Shut up.” She pulls back just enough to grin at you, tucking a stray piece of hair behind your ear. “I’m serious, though. If worst comes to worst, you and I will just get married and raise the baby together. Two badass moms against the world.” 
A laugh bubbles out of you, real this time. “You’d hate being married to me.” 
“Yeah, but I’d do it out of love. I’d be the hot, rich, wine-drunk mom. You’d be the stressed one who has to actually parent.” You roll your eyes, but the weight in your chest feels just a little bit lighter. Yuna smiles. “See? You’re gonna be okay.” and you think, maybe she’s right, maybe you will be okay. 
The next day feels like a blur. Again. Like you’re going through the motions of life with no real end goal. You know you have to get up, do something. Tell Jake that he’s going to be a fucking father because the longer you keep this a secret the more its eating you up inside out. 
You spend most of your day in the dorm, curled up on the couch with the TV playing some random show you’re not even paying attention to. The volume is low, just background noise to fill the silence, but it doesn’t stop your mind from racing. Jake has been calling all day. Text after text, call after call—his name keeps flashing on your screen, but you can’t bring yourself to answer. You know you should. You know avoiding him won’t make this easier. But every time you reach for your phone, your stomach twists, and your fingers freeze, and the weight of what you have to tell him slams into you all over again. So you do nothing. 
You let the calls go to voicemail. You leave the texts unread. And now, as the sun sets and the room is cast in a dim, golden glow, you’re still here—still stuck, still waiting, still pretending for just a little longer that none of this is happening. But then there's a knock on your door. And you're scared shitless because you think you know who it is. For a second, you don’t move, barely even breathe. Then another knock—firmer this time. 
Slowly, legs unsteady beneath you, you rise from the couch. Your hands feel cold as you grip the doorknob, pulse hammering in your ears as you turn it and pull the door open. And there he is. Jake. Standing in the dimly lit hallway, his hair still damp from a shower, his brows drawn together in confusion and concern. His eyes—those warm, familiar eyes—scan over you, taking in your messy hair, the exhaustion written all over your face, the way you’re not meeting his gaze. 
He shifts his weight, tilting his head. “…What’s going on with you?” You grip the edge of the door tighter. Your throat closes. Jake exhales, his expression softening as he reaches up, brushing his fingers over the side of your face like he’s trying to pull you back to him, trying to figure out what’s wrong. “You’ve been ignoring me all day.” 
His voice is quieter now, tinged with something almost like worry. You swallow hard and your chest tightens, because this is it. There's no more running because Jake is right here in front of you. Jake doesn’t wait for permission. The second you hesitate, the second you shift like you might try to close the door on him, he pushes inside. 
The door clicks shut behind him, sealing you both in. He stands there, shoulders tense, his eyes scanning over you like he’s trying to read your mind. His brows are furrowed, frustration flickering behind his gaze. “What the hell is going on with you?” he demands. 
Your stomach knots. “Jake—” 
“No, seriously,” he cuts in, voice sharp. “Why the hell have you been ignoring me all day? You haven’t answered a single one of my texts, didn’t pick up any of my calls. I had to come here just to get you to look at me.” You take a step back, wrapping your arms around yourself. The room feels too small, the air too thick. “I told you. I’m sick.” 
Jake scoffs, running a hand through his hair. “That’s bullshit.” Your breath catches. He shakes his head, eyes narrowing as he watches you. “You don’t just disappear like that. You don’t just cut me off without a reason.” He exhales sharply, like he’s trying to keep his temper in check. “Did I… do something?” His voice is quieter now, more cautious. 
“Because if I did, just—tell me. Whatever it is, I’ll fix it.” His jaw clenches. “I just—fuck, I don’t know—I miss you.” Your heart stutters. You stare at him, the weight of his words pressing into your ribs, making it even harder to breathe. “I’ve wanted to run here to you all week, tell you about my game, watch movies with you. Anything, but you're shutting me out.” This is Jake. You’re jake. And suddenly all of it feels so much worse. 
Your voice is small when you finally speak. “You didn’t do anything.” Jake takes a step closer, searching your face. “Then what is it?” You inhale shakily. Your hands tremble at your sides. Your throat burns. It’s time. There’s no easy way to do this. No way to soften it. 
So you just say it. “I’m pregnant.” 
Silence. It crashes over the room like a tidal wave. Jake doesn’t move, for a moment it looks like he doesn’t even breathe. Completely still. His face goes blank, his lips parting slightly like the words haven’t fully registered. His fingers twitch at his sides, his whole body stiff with shock. You stare at him, heart pounding, waiting—waiting for something. Some kind of reaction. Some kind of response. But he doesn’t say a word. Your stomach twists. He just keeps standing there, frozen, staring at you like you’ve just rewritten his entire reality. And maybe you had. 
You bite your lip, blinking back the burn in your eyes. When you finally speak again, your voice is quieter. Sharper. “This is your only chance to take the out.” Jake’s brows pull together slightly, but he still says nothing. You swallow the lump in your throat. “If you don’t want this, if you don’t want to be responsible for a baby, you can walk away. Right now.” Your voice shakes. “No one would blame you. I won’t blame you.” Jake blinks. Still silent. Still motionless. Your heart slams against your ribs. You hate this. Hate this. Hate that you don’t know what’s going through his head. Hate that you feel this vulnerable, this exposed, this small. 
You force yourself to look him in the eyes. “I know hockey is your life..” You trail. “ I know that’s what you’re thinking about right now. You forget that before..this, we were friends. good friends. I know what hockey means to you and I would never in a million years ask for you to choose. So I'm giving you a choice. be a dad or walk away. Neither of those involve not playing hockey. but i’m telling you right now. if you choose this, if you’re all in you better be all in because this is your only time to tap out. don’t get my hopes up then crush them when it gets too hard because i’ll never forgive you for that.” 
Jake just stands there. Still silent. Still unreadable. 
“Why are you not saying anything?” You whispered brokenly, the silence almost too much to bear. “Please say something.” 
Finally, Jake’s mouth opens but then it shuts again like he’s trying to find the ability to speak. Like a failing fish out of water. It’s nerve wracking, your body feels like it's on fire. “Please Jake.” You beg, at your wits end. 
“You’re giving me an out..” He trailed off, and your heart sank at the words. Was he really going to walk away and leave you to raise a baby alone? The thought terrified you to no end. “You’re giving me an out and a very big part of me is screaming at me to take it. it would be the smart thing, the easy thing and maybe the best thing for my career. My brain is ticking, yelling over and over ‘take the out, take the out. but there is a small part of me that outways the rest, a part that won’t let me be like the man who didn’t have the guts to raise me. that refuses to leave this kid, my kid, without a father. so, yes I'm quiet and yes I'm not saying anything. because my mind is going to war trying to think of a way to be a dad and a damn good hockey player at the sametime.” 
“Okay.” You said simply. And for a while you both sat in silence, neither of you finding the right words to say. Until you couldn’t take it anymore. 
“Did you figure it out?” You asked him. Jake’s eyes closed, a deep breath falling from his lips. 
“No.” He said simply, “but I will.” Your head shot up in surprise, your eyes wide and glassy with tears threatening to spill. 
“You’re in?” You ask with a strained voice. 
“I’m in.” 
Jake and yourself had a lot more that you had to talk about, that was for sure. But the confirmation of him staying and raising this baby with you had definitely lifted a large weight off your shoulders and although you were less terrified it didn’t mean you were prepared. You were having a baby for god's sake. That scared you to death. And you weren't sure if you were entirely ready for it. 
Over the next few weeks Jake does things that prove he's all in. The first time Jake shows up, you don’t expect it. You step out of the campus doors, arms wrapped around yourself, still shaken from your last appointment. The air is crisp, biting at your skin as you take a deep breath, trying to center yourself. And then you hear it. The sound of footsteps. The rustling of fabric. And then - “Hey.” Your head snaps up. Jake is there, leaning against the side of his car, hands tucked into the pockets of his hoodie. His hair is messy like he’s been running his hands through it all day, his duffel bag slung over one shoulder like he just came from practice. 
Your stomach flips. “What are you doing here?” you ask. Jake shrugs, pushing off the car. “Thought you might need a ride.” 
​​You hesitate, tightening your grip on the sleeve of your hoodie. “I can take the bus,” you say, voice quiet. Jake raises a brow. “You could. Or you could let me drive you home.” You don’t have the energy to argue. Not today. So you nod. Jake doesn’t say much on the ride back. He keeps his eyes on the road, hands gripping the wheel, but every so often, his gaze flickers toward you — like he’s checking to make sure you’re still there. 
It keeps happening. 
A few days later, a jersey appears on the back of your desk chair. One of Jake’s, the fabric worn in places, his last name sprawled across the back in bold letters. You pick it up, running your fingers over the lettering. There’s a note tucked into the sleeve. "Just in case you need something warm." Your breath catches. 
The next time you see him, you don’t bring it up. But when you wear the jersey around your dorm, you pretend not to notice the way Yuna raises a knowing brow. Jake keeps showing up. Not in the obvious ways, not in ways that force anything. But in the background. In the small things. A decaf coffee left on your desk when you step out of class. A text asking if you’ve eaten. A moment at the rink where he catches your eyes before disappearing into the locker room. He doesn’t say anything about the pregnancy. Not yet. But he’s there. And that terrifies you just as much as it comforts you. 
Jake isn’t there. Not really. His body is on the ice, his skates cutting across the surface, his hands gripping his stick, but his mind—his mind is still sitting in that sterile doctor’s office, staring at a screen where a tiny, flickering heartbeat had filled the room. "There’s your baby."  He can still hear the doctor’s voice, still feel the way his stomach had plummeted as the reality of it settled in, pressing down on him like a weight he couldn’t shake. "Your baby."  Jake clenches his jaw, gripping his stick tighter. 
“Jake!” The sharp bark of his name barely registers before — CRACK. The puck flies past him, a blur of black and white as it slams into the boards. “Jesus Christ, Sim!” Jake blinks, snapping back into focus just in time to see his coach skating toward him, fuming. His teammates shift uncomfortably, casting wary glances between them as Coach Bennet stops in front of Jake, eyes blazing. 
​​“You wanna tell me where the hell your head is at today?” Coach snaps. “Because it sure as hell isn’t here.” Jake swallows hard. His grip on his stick tightens, knuckles going white. “I—” Coach doesn’t let him finish. 
“You’ve been slow all practice. Missing passes, losing pucks—you’re a vital part of this team, Sim. You don’t get to check out like this.” His voice drops slightly, but it only makes the words hit harder. “Get it together. Now.” Jake nods stiffly.  He doesn’t say anything. Because what the hell is he supposed to say? That he can’t focus because his whole life changed forever? That there’s a baby now—a real, growing baby—and he doesn’t know what the fuck to do with that? That every time he closes his eyes, all he can see is that ultrasound? 
Coach exhales sharply, rubbing a hand over his face. “Take five.” Jake doesn’t argue. He skates off the ice, his heart pounding. He needs to get his head straight. Now. Because if he doesn’t — He might just lose everything. 
Jake barely makes it through the rest of practice. He’s off. Way off. His passes are sloppy. His shots lack power. He’s slow to react, too caught up in his head to play the way he’s supposed to. By the time Coach blows the final whistle, Jake is drenched in sweat and running on empty. His entire body feels tense, like his muscles are wound so tight they might snap. He just needs to get out of here. 
He needs to shower, grab his stuff, and go check on you. But before he can make it out of the locker room — “Yo, Sim!” Jake glances up, spotting Jay, Heeseung, and Sunghoon making their way toward him. Jay slings an arm over his shoulders, still dripping wet from his shower. “We’re heading to a party tonight. You coming?” 
Jake doesn’t even hesitate. “No.” 
Jay pulls back slightly, raising a brow. “No?” 
“Dude,” Sunghoon snorts. “It’s a Friday night, and you’re passing up a party? Who are you?” Jake exhales, shaking his head as he shoves his gear into his bag. “I just—” He hesitates. “I have somewhere to be.” 
Heeseung leans against the lockers, crossing his arms. “You’ve been weird as hell all day, man.” Jay nods. “Yeah, what’s going on with you?” 
Jake grips the strap of his duffel so tight it hurts. He could make something up. Should make something up. But instead — it just spills out, before Jake could stop it. “She’s pregnant.” The words hang heavy in the air. None of them move. None of them speak. Jay blinks. “Wait. What?” and Jake laughs.
Or at least, he tries to. It comes out more like a broken, choked sound. His throat feels tight, his chest squeezed so hard it physically hurts. “She’s pregnant,” he says again, voice cracking. And then, before he can even stop it — He’s crying. Right there, in the middle of the locker room, surrounded by his teammates, Jake fucking breaks. 
His head falls into his hands, his shoulders shaking as he lets it out. Because he’s scared. Because he doesn’t know what the hell he’s doing. Because this isn’t part of the plan. And for the first time in his entire life, he doesn’t know how to fix it. “Fuck, man,” Heeseung breathes. Jay is the first to move, stepping closer and clamping a firm hand on Jake’s back. “Hey, hey, it’s okay.” Jake shakes his head. “No, it’s not.” His voice is raw, shaky. “I don’t—I don’t know what to do.” 
Sunghoon exhales through his nose. “Okay, first? Breathe.” Jake tries. And fails. He sucks in a breath, but it feels like nothing is getting in. His heart is racing, his mind spinning, and everything is just — “Jake.” Jay squeezes his shoulder. “You’re not alone in this.” Jake lifts his head, eyes red, glassy. 
“We got you, man,” Heeseung says quietly. “No matter what.” Sunghoon nods. “Yeah. And, I mean—” He gestures around. “This isn’t exactly news you should be dealing with alone.” 
Jay nudges him lightly. “Have you told her how you feel?” Jake wipes at his face, sniffing. “I don’t even know how I feel.” His voice wobbles. “I just—I need to see her.” Jay exchanges a glance with Heeseung before looking back at him. “Then go” 
Jake doesn’t wait. He grabs his bag, slings it over his shoulder, and leaves. 
The knock at your door startles you. You freeze mid-reach for your phone, heart suddenly hammering in your chest. You already know who it is. For a second, you consider ignoring it. Pretending you’re asleep. Pretending you’re busy. You’re not sure you want any company. But you can’t do that forever. 
So you force yourself up, smoothing down the front of your sweater as you cross the room. You take a steadying breath, gripping the doorknob with fingers that tremble just slightly, and pull it open. Jake stands there. The first thing you notice is the hoodie—dark gray, pulled up over his head, casting a shadow over his face. His duffel bag is slung over one shoulder, his hockey gear probably stuffed inside. His posture is a little tense, like he had to talk himself into coming here. But the real thing that catches your attention is what he’s holding. 
A takeout bag. Your throat tightens. “I, uh…” Jake shifts on his feet, glancing down at the bag like he suddenly doesn’t know what to do with it. “I remembered you said you were craving this, so I thought—” He hesitates, clears his throat, then lifts the bag slightly. “I figured I’d bring you some.” Something cracks inside you. Because it’s such a small thing—just food, just a meal—but the fact that he remembered that he went out of his way after practice when he was probably exhausted, when he could have avoided all of this — You swallow hard and step aside, voice softer than you mean for it to be. “Come in.” 
Jake hesitates for just a second before stepping inside. The door clicks shut behind him. He doesn’t look around, doesn’t hesitate, just walks straight over to your desk and sets the bag down before collapsing onto your bed like it’s the most natural thing in the world. Like this is normal. Like nothing between you has changed. He stretches out slightly, fingers drumming against his thigh before he looks at you. 
“So,” he says, voice easy, like he’s not breaking some invisible barrier by being here. “How was your day?” You blink. It’s such a simple question, but it feels heavier than it should. Because what does he want to hear? That you spent most of it overthinking? That you barely slept last night, kept up by the thought of everything crashing down around you? That every time you close your eyes, you see your own future in a way you never imagined it before? Instead, you inhale deeply and say, “It was fine.” Jake gives you a look. You fidget slightly under his gaze before sighing and elaborating. 
“I had class this morning,” you start, perching on the edge of your chair. “Yuna and I grabbed coffee after, but the barista completely messed up my order, so I ended up drinking the strongest espresso of my life. I swear I could hear colors after that.” Jake snorts, shaking his head. “Then I came back to my room, tried to take a nap, but the guys across the hall decided to have a full-on garage band session at, like, peak volume.” You groan, rubbing your temples. “It sounded like someone was murdering an electric guitar.” 
Jake tilts his head. “Were they at least good?” 
You deadpan. “No.” He chuckles, the sound low and familiar, something that almost makes you feel lighter. So you keep talking. You tell him about your classes, about how Yuna dragged you into watching some new drama that she’s absolutely obsessed with. About how you got sucked into a rabbit hole of cat videos on your phone, and one was so funny that you laughed until you cried. And the whole time, Jake listens. Not just in the polite, half-distracted way people sometimes do. No—he really listens. He nods at the right moments. Asks questions. Throws in sarcastic comments that make you roll your eyes but also bite back a smile. And it’s so… easy. 
For a few minutes, it’s like things are the way they used to be. Like there’s no giant, life-changing revelation hanging over your heads. Like it’s just you and him. Like it’s always been. But that’s the thing about pretending. Eventually, reality always catches up. 
You shouldn’t be staring at Jake. But you are. It’s not your fault, really. He’s sitting on your bed like he belongs there, hoodie still pulled up, fingers absentmindedly picking at a loose thread on your blanket. The room is dim, just your bedside lamp casting a soft glow, making everything feel warmer. Closer. And maybe it’s the lighting, or maybe it’s just the fact that he’s here, but — he looks good. Really, good. You could blame it on the hormones but you know that’s not entirely true, you were attracted to Jake enough to fuck him on the regular. 
Which is so not what you should be thinking about right now. Especially when everything between you is so much bigger than it used to be. Still, you can’t help but glance at him as you chew your food, watching the way his jaw tenses like he’s caught up in his own head. So, to fill the silence, you ask, “What about you? What did you do today?” 
Jake blinks, like you’ve just pulled him out of a thought he wasn’t ready to leave. Then he sighs. “Practice.” You raise a brow. “That’s it?” He huffs out a soft laugh. “That’s pretty much all I do.” 
You roll your eyes, leaning back against your pillows. “Yeah, yeah. Hockey is life.” Jake smirks. “Glad you’re finally getting it.” You nudge him lightly with your foot, and for the first time in days, something feels normal. But then you see the way his smirk fades slightly, the way his fingers keep fidgeting. 
“How was practice?” you ask. Jake hesitates. And you can tell — whatever it is, he doesn’t want to say it. But after a moment, he sighs. “It sucked.” That makes you pause. Jake never complains about practice. Even when he’s exhausted, even when he’s been chewed out by his coach, even when he’s sore and bruised—he always shrugs it off. It’s just part of the game. So the fact that he’s saying it now means something. 
“Why?” you ask, setting your food down. Jake drags a hand through his hair, exhaling. “I don’t know. I couldn’t focus. Coach was on my ass all day. Kept telling me to get my head in the game.” He shakes his head, voice quieter now. “I just… couldn’t.” Your chest tightens. Because you know. You know why he couldn’t focus. And it hits you, suddenly — Jake is scared. Maybe not in the same way you are. Maybe not in the overwhelming, spiraling, how-will-I-ever-handle-this way that’s been sitting heavy in your chest since you saw that test. 
But still—Jake is scared. And for the first time since this whole thing started, you realize, You’re not the only one whose world is changing. Jake won’t look at you. His eyes stay fixed on some invisible point in the room, his jaw tense, fingers still picking at the frayed thread on your blanket. He looks like he wants to say something, like there’s too much sitting on his tongue, but he doesn’t know where to start. And for some reason, that makes your chest ache. 
“Jake…” you start carefully. His head tilts slightly, but he still doesn’t meet your gaze. You swallow. “Is it because of—”
“You,” Jake says suddenly. The word is soft. Quiet. But it still punches the air right out of your lungs. Your breath catches. “Me?” Jake finally lifts his eyes to yours, and god, they’re unreadable. Dark, searching—like he’s trying to figure out what the hell to do with everything inside him.
“Yeah,” he mutters. His voice is rough, like he’s only just now admitting it to himself. “It’s you. It’s… this.” He gestures vaguely, and you know he means all of it. The pregnancy. The secret you held onto for weeks. The way everything between you is shifting, unsteady, the ground cracking beneath both of you in real time. And it’s weird. Because part of you has spent so long thinking about how this will change your life—how everything is unraveling for you—that it didn’t even occur to you that Jake is unraveling too.
That he’s scared. Just like you. The thought makes something twist deep in your stomach. You exhale, shifting slightly so you’re facing him completely. “I didn’t mean to mess everything up for you.” Jake’s brows knit together immediately. “What?” You glance down at your hands. “I know hockey is your whole life, Jake. I know you’ve got… plans, and dreams, and this wasn’t supposed to happen. And now it’s just—” You trail off, biting the inside of your cheek before whispering, “I don’t want you to hate me for it.”
Jake stiffens. The room is silent for a long, painful moment. Then, suddenly, he shifts—pushing himself off the bed and moving toward you so fast that your breath stumbles. He doesn’t touch you, but he’s closer now. Close enough that you can see the way his knuckles are white from how hard he’s gripping his hoodie sleeves.
“Don’t say that,” he says, voice low. “Don’t ever say that.” You blink up at him, startled by the sudden intensity in his eyes. Jake shakes his head, exhaling sharply. “I could never hate you.” Your throat tightens. “But I—”
“You didn’t do this alone.” His voice is firm, certain. “You didn’t just wake up one day and decide to flip my life upside down. I was there, too.” You let out a weak, humorless laugh. “Yeah, well, I’m the one carrying it.” Jake flinches slightly at the word carrying, but he doesn’t look away.
“I know,” he says. His voice is softer now. “And I know it’s different for you. I know I’ll never fully get what that feels like.” He swallows hard. “But this isn’t just on you, okay? I’m scared too.” Your heart stutters. Because this is Jake. The Jake who’s always been so steady. So sure of himself. Who skates like nothing in the world could shake him. And now he’s sitting in front of you, looking like he’s the one who can’t find his footing.
You don’t know what to say. So you just nod. Jake exhales, dragging a hand through his hair before falling back onto your bed. He stares at the ceiling for a long second, letting the silence settle between you again. Then, with a small, almost bitter laugh, he says, “God, no wonder Coach was on my ass all day.”
That startles a laugh out of you. It’s small, barely there, but Jake notices. His lips twitch. “Oh, so now it’s funny?”
You sniffle, shaking your head. “I mean… kinda.” Jake groans, throwing an arm over his face. “Glad you’re enjoying my suffering.” You roll your eyes, nudging his foot lightly with yours. “It’s not suffering, it’s called consequences.” Jake drops his arm, lifting his head to give you a flat look. “I don’t like that word.”
You smirk. “Well, get used to it.” For a moment, you just sit there, looking at each other. And something settles. The air is still heavy, the weight of everything still pressing down on both of you. But… It doesn’t feel so suffocating anymore. 
The rest of the night kept going just like that, sat next together watching reruns, laughing about everything. You’re trying to focus on the show playing in front of you. Really, you are. But it’s hard—and not just because Jake keeps making little comments about the plot, half-serious, half to mess with you. It’s because you can’t stop thinking about it. Something that has been plaguing you these past few weeks. The feeling has been creeping up on you for weeks now, an itch under your skin that only seems to get worse. At first, you thought it was just stress, or maybe a weird symptom of everything your body was going through. But now, sitting here next to Jake, your legs tucked up under you, his thigh warm where it brushes against yours — 
You know exactly what it is. And god, it’s humiliating. Because there’s no good way to say it. Hey, Jake, I know our lives are changing forever, but by the way, I’m really, really horny. You press your lips together, eyes flickering toward him. He looks relaxed, his arm slung lazily over the back of your bed, fingers occasionally tapping against the blanket. His hoodie has shifted slightly, revealing a strip of skin above the waistband of his sweats, and why are you even looking at that? 
You force yourself to look back at the screen, gripping your blanket like it might physically restrain you from saying something stupid. But then Jake shifts, turning toward you slightly. “You good?” You freeze. “What?” 
Jake gives you a look. “You keep making weird faces.” Shit. You clear your throat, shaking your head quickly. “I’m fine.” Jake raises an eyebrow, unconvinced. “You sure?” 
No. “Yeah.” but he doesn’t look away, god can he just look away. “Because if something’s wrong—” 
“I said I’m fine,” you blurt, a little too quickly, a little too defensive. Jake blinks. You clamp your mouth shut. Then, slowly, his expression shifts. Like he’s figuring something out. Like he’s putting a puzzle together, piece by piece. And suddenly, you regret everything. Because this is Jake.
Jake, who knows your body better than anyone. Jake, who has spent the last year reading your little shifts and signals, knowing exactly when you wanted him—when you needed him—even before you ever said a word. And now he’s looking at you like he knows exactly what’s on your mind. Your stomach flips. His lips part slightly, like he’s about to say something — But you panic, snatching the remote and turning the volume up way too high.
Jake flinches at the sudden blare of noise. “Jesus—”
“Sorry!” You fumble with the remote, lowering it again. “My hand slipped.” Jake stares at you. Then—slowly—he smirks. Your stomach plummets. “Your hand slipped?” he repeats, amusement dripping from his tone. You nod quickly. “Yep.” Jake tilts his head, still watching you. Your heart is pounding. And you realize, with absolute horror, that there is no way you’re getting out of this.
Jake is still watching you. And you can tell by the glint in his eyes, the way his smirk is growing, that he knows something’s up. So, before he can start teasing you, you blurt out the first thing on your mind. “Are you gonna sleep with other girls?”
Jake stills. His smirk drops instantly. His whole expression shifts from amused to completely caught off guard. “What?” You don’t back down. You cross your arms, looking straight at him. “Now that I’m, you know…” You gesture vaguely toward your stomach. “Are you still gonna sleep with other people?”
Jake’s eyebrows furrow, like the thought hadn’t even occurred to him. “No.” Just that. No. No hesitation, no confusion, just a simple, matter-of-fact no. And that does something to you. Because you weren’t even sure why you asked it. Maybe because you never really talked about exclusivity before. Maybe because things between you have felt so different lately, and you needed to know. Or maybe because part of you was scared that nothing was different for Jake  that he’d still be going out, still be with other girls, while you were here, pregnant with his child.
But now, sitting here, watching the way his brows are still pulled together like he can’t believe you even asked  Something inside you loosens. You exhale. “Good.” Then, before you can overthink it, before Jake can even process what’s happening You lean in and kiss him.
Jake freezes. It’s so different from the way things used to be. Before, your kisses were quick, hungry, never filled with anything but need. But this is slow. This is intentional. And it’s Jake who responds first.
He melts into you, his hand reaching up to cup your jaw, tilting your face just right as he deepens the kiss. His lips are warm, familiar, but there’s something new in the way he kisses you now, something softer, something that lingers. And god, you need him. Every built-up thought, every moment of tension from the last few weeks, crashes into you all at once. You press closer, hands fisting into his hoodie, pulling him in.
Jake makes a low sound in his throat, his grip tightening slightly, his other hand sliding down to your waist. His fingers skim the hem of your shirt, hesitate — Then he pulls away just slightly, forehead resting against yours, breathing hard. “Are you—” His voice is hoarse, strained. “Are you sure?” You nod. Jake studies you for a moment, searching your face for any sign of hesitation. But when he finds none, his lips crash into yours again. And this time  Neither of you stop. Jake kisses you like he’s making up for lost time.
Like he’s been waiting for this, just as much as you have. His hands slide up your sides, slow and careful, like he’s still giving you a chance to change your mind but you don’t. You can’t. You press closer, your fingers tangling in the fabric of his hoodie, and that’s all it takes. A low curse slips from his lips as he pulls the hoodie over his head, tossing it aside. The sight of him, his flushed skin, his rapid breathing sends a shiver through you. He’s so warm, and when his hands find your hips, you let him guide you back against the pillows, your body reacting on instinct.
Everything feels different. Not in a bad way. Not in a way that makes you hesitate. Just in a way that makes you aware of the weight of his body, the way he touches you, the way he looks at you. Because for the first time, it’s not just mindless. For the first time, Jake is looking at you like he actually sees you. And god, you want him.
His lips trail down, pressing soft kisses along your jaw, your neck, your shoulder everywhere. His hands are careful, slower than usual, like he’s savoring the moment instead of rushing through it. And that’s the thing there’s no rush. Because tonight isn’t about just getting lost in each other. Tonight is something else. Something neither of you have had before. And as Jake’s lips find yours again, breathless, desperate, needing you let yourself fall. 
He took his time peeling off every layer of clothing that stood in your way, his sensual kisses leaving butterfly like feelings in his wake as he moved them up and down the expanse of your neck. It was more romantic than you had ever experienced. He was taking his time with you, cherishing your body as he helped you, cradled you. There was beauty in the way the two of you were finally joined, again. 
You are on top of him, your knees on either side of his hips, lifting yourself up than crashing down to the tune of your own heartbeat in your ears. Jake drank in the sight of you, his hands running up and down your body, squeezing at your breasts like a vice. They were noticeably bigger and it was apparent that Jake loved it. 
Your moans and groans grew in tandem as Jake whispered dirty things into your ear. The gasps he let out everytime your hips slapped against yours served as a catalyst to your already awaiting orgasm. It hit you like a tidal wave, washing over your body in its wake. Jake followed not long after. His body is shaking along with yours. And when it was over, you sat atop him with him still nestled deep inside of you and fell asleep. Feeling more peaceful than you have in weeks. 
The next morning, the first thing you register is warmth. It’s different from the usual comfort of your blankets or the lingering haze of sleep. It’s heavier, grounding, and when you blink your eyes open, it takes you a second to realize why. Jake is still next to you. He’s lying on his stomach, face half-buried in the pillow, one arm stretched lazily across your waist. His breathing is slow, deep, even, and in the soft morning light filtering through your curtains, he looks so peaceful. So different.
Jake is always moving, always carrying some kind of restless energy on the ice, at parties, even just sitting next to you. But right now, he’s still. His hair is a mess, sticking up at odd angles, his lips parted slightly as he sleeps. You can feel the gentle rise and fall of his chest, the subtle weight of his arm over you, and for a brief, fragile moment, you let yourself just exist here. In this sliver of morning where nothing has to be said. Where nothing has to change. But eventually, Jake stirs.
He shifts against the pillow, letting out a low hum as his lashes flutter open, still heavy with sleep. His grip on you tightens for a second before he pulls away, rubbing at his face. You watch as he blinks a few times, clearly still waking up, before his gaze finally settles on you. A small, lazy smile.
"Mornin’," he murmurs, his voice low, hoarse. You swallow, forcing yourself to look away from the mess of his hair, the sleep-drunk warmth in his eyes. "Morning." Jake shifts onto his side, his movements slower than usual, more relaxed. His eyes flicker toward the bedside table, where his phone buzzes quietly, before he turns back to you.
"The frat’s having a thing tonight," he says, voice still rough from sleep. "Not a party, just a small get-together. You should come." You hesitate. "A get-together?"
Jake nods, stretching one arm above his head before letting it drop back onto the pillow. "Yeah. Just the guys, Yunjin, Yuna, Heeseung’s girl. No crazy shit." He tilts his head slightly, studying you. “It might be good for you.” There’s something careful in the way he says it. Like he’s watching for your reaction. And the truth is, you don’t know how to feel. You haven’t really been out since everything happened. The idea of being around everyone again of feeling like things are normal when they’re so clearly not makes something twist in your chest.
Jake notices. "You don’t have to," he says, quieter now. “I just thought—" He stops, rubbing at the back of his neck. "I just thought you might wanna get out for a bit. Clear your head.” And the way he says it, the way his eyes flicker to your stomach for the briefest second before meeting yours again.  You know what he means. He’s giving you an out. If you don’t want to go, he won’t push. If you say no, he won’t mention it again. But the idea lingers.
Because part of you does miss it. Misses laughing with Yuna and Yunjin, miss sitting around and watching Heeseung get bullied by the guys, miss feeling like yourself. Even if things aren’t the same anymore. You exhale slowly, biting the inside of your cheek. “…Okay.” Jake blinks, like he wasn’t expecting you to actually agree. Then slowly, a small smile tugs at his lips. “Yeah?” You nod, and something inside you eases. This could be fun and god knows you need that in your life right about now. 
That night, air is crisp as you step outside, carrying the first whispers of winter on its breath. You tug your coat tighter around you, relishing in the warmth as you walk alongside Jake. His hands are stuffed into the pockets of his hoodie, the fabric pulled over his head, but you can still see the easy grin playing at his lips. There’s something light about tonight, something you hadn’t expected. It’s been weeks of suffocating thoughts, of holding your breath, of feeling like the weight of the world was pressing down on your chest. But tonight, for the first time, that pressure isn’t there. Maybe it’s because you’re choosing this. Or maybe it’s because Jake's here with you. 
Jake glances at you as you walk. “You good?” 
You nod. “Yeah.” 
“You sure?” He nudges your arm lightly with his elbow, playful, teasing. “Because I don’t wanna show up and have you ditch me two minutes in. That’d be kinda embarrassing.” You roll your eyes but can’t fight the small laugh that escapes you. “I’m not gonna ditch you.” Jake hums, side-eyeing you like he doesn’t quite believe you. “I dunno. You’ve been real unpredictable lately.”  You nudge him back, a little harder this time, and he lets out a soft chuckle.
The sidewalk stretches ahead, illuminated by the golden glow of streetlights. It’s late enough that campus is quiet, the usual bustle of students reduced to only the occasional passing group, muffled laughter carrying through the air. The night feels calm. Jake walks beside you in that familiar, effortless way—like being near you is second nature. And maybe it is. Maybe, despite everything, it always has been You glance over at him. “So, what exactly is this get-together?”
Jake shrugs. “Just a small thing. Heeseung and Jay wanted to do something before our next away game. No crazy party, just hanging out.”
“And you’re sure about that?”
“Swear on my life.” He presses a hand over his heart. “No surprise kegs, no random strangers passing out in the hall. Just us.” It sounds… nice. Like the kind of normalcy you hadn’t realized you missed until now. The thought makes you exhale softly, your steps slowing just a fraction. You hadn’t expected to feel good tonight. Hadn’t expected to look forward to anything, let alone this. Jake notices your pause and turns slightly, walking backward now so he can face you. “Hey,” he says, tilting his head, “we can still turn around, you know. You don’t have to go if you don’t want to.” But you do.
So you shake your head. “I wanna go.” Jake studies you for a second, like he’s searching for any hesitation. But there isn’t any. Not tonight. Eventually, he nods. “Okay,” he says. Then, his lips twitch into something softer. “Good.” And as you near the house, the sound of laughter spilling out onto the porch, the glow of string lights hanging from the windows, You realize you’re glad you came. 
The warmth of the frat house greets you the moment you step inside, a stark contrast to the chill outside. The air is thick with the scent of garlic bread and pasta, something home-cooked and rich, filling the space with a kind of comfort you hadn’t expected. Laughter hums in the background, the low murmur of conversation weaving between the sound of utensils clinking against plates. It’s not the kind of party you’d grown used to at this house. No booming music rattling the walls, no overwhelming crush of bodies moving in tandem, no spilled drinks coating the floor in sticky regret. Instead, it feels warm, familiar. Like a gathering of people who actually care about each other. Jake’s friends greet him instantly, throwing easy nods and teasing jabs his way. Jay claps him on the shoulder, Heeseung tosses some offhand comment about how “Wow, Sim, you actually showed up for once?” but then their attention shifts to you.
“Hey!” Yunjin grins, pulling you into a quick hug. “We were wondering if you’d come.” You smile. “Yeah, Jake convinced me.”
“Good. You needed to get out,” Yuna says, appearing at your side with her usual knowing smirk. “You can’t just sit in the dorm watching Netflix and eating fruit snacks for the next few months.”
You narrow your eyes. “That was one time.”
Yunjin snickers. “Sure, babe.”
There’s no judgment in their words, though, just familiarity. That easy friendship that makes your chest loosen. Everyone settles into a comfortable rhythm as the night unfolds, plates passed around, laughter spilling over casual conversation, Jake leaning back into the couch beside you, his arm draped along the back of it, close but not quite touching. And then, at some point, the conversation shifts.
“So,” Yunjin says, sitting forward, her eyes flickering between you and Jake. “We have to talk about something important.” You blink. “Uh… okay?”
Yuna grins. “A baby shower.” You choke on your drink. “A what?”
“A baby shower!” Heeseung’s girlfriend nods eagerly. “Come on, you have to have one! It’ll be so cute!” You stare at them. “I mean, I—”
“It’s not really up to you,” Yunjin interrupts, waving a hand dismissively. “We’ve already decided. We’re throwing one.” Jake huffs a small laugh beside you, shaking his head. “You guys are ridiculous.”
“You’re having a baby, dude. This is happening.” Jay gestures between the two of you. “You might as well have a party for it.” You glance at Jake, unsure what to say. The idea of a baby shower hadn’t even crossed your mind yet. There’s been so much to think about. doctor’s appointments, your classes, the slow, terrifying reality of your life shifting that something as normal as a baby shower hadn’t even made it onto the list. But the way everyone is looking at you excited, hopeful, like they genuinely want to do this for you makes something warm settle in your chest.
Jake’s knee bumps against yours as he shifts beside you. “What do you think?” he asks, voice low enough that it’s meant just for you. You hesitate for only a second before nodding. “I think…” You exhale, looking back at your friends. “I think it sounds exciting.” The girls cheer. Heeseung claps Jake on the back. “Guess you better start making a registry, man.” Jake groans, but there’s something soft in his expression, something light. Something you’d love to see over and over again until you die. 
The conversation drifts naturally, flowing from one topic to the next like the rise and fall of a tide. The laughter still lingers in the air, the warmth of it curling around you like a blanket, but then the topic shifts. Jay leans back in his chair, stretching his arms above his head. “Man, this schedule is gonna kill me.”
Heeseung snorts. “You say that every year.”
“Yeah, and I mean it every year.” Jay groans, letting his head fall back against the couch. “Back-to-back away games? We barely get time to breathe.” Jake lets out a low chuckle beside you. “You’re so dramatic.”
Jay lifts his head just enough to glare at him. “Shut up, Sim. You love this shit.” Jake shrugs, unbothered. “I mean, yeah. It’s hockey. What’s not to love?” And just like that, the floodgates open. The guys dive into a conversation that feels almost foreign to you, play schedules, practice drills, strategies for upcoming games. They speak in a language that’s second nature to them, that thrives in their bones, their voices animated, hands gesturing wildly as they argue over stats and game plans. And at first, it’s nothing. At first, you just sit there, listening. But then — Then it starts to settle.
Jake does love this. It’s not just a hobby, not just a college sport—it’s his life. The hours, the dedication, the grueling schedule—it doesn’t seem to weigh on him the way it does the others. He thrives in it. He needs it. And this is just college. If he’s this busy now…
The thought creeps in, slow but merciless. If this is what his schedule looks like now—morning practices, late-night workouts, weekend-long away games—what the hell is it going to look like when he goes pro? Because he will. You know it as sure as you know the sun will rise in the morning. Jake was built for this. It’s what he’s worked for, what he’s bled for. Hockey isn’t just something he loves. It’s his future. And where the hell do you fit into that?
You blink, barely registering that the conversation is still going, that the guys are still talking and laughing and teasing each other, that the warmth of the room hasn’t faded—but suddenly, it feels distant. A dull, steady ache starts in your chest, creeping up your throat, tightening around your ribs. You stare at the flickering candle on the table, at the way the wax pools and hardens, melting and reforming in an endless cycle. They keep talking. And you go quiet.
You don’t even realize how still you’ve gone until Jake nudges your knee with his own. “Hey.” His voice is softer now, pulling you out of your spiraling thoughts. You look up, meeting his gaze, and there’s a slight furrow between his brows, that subtle shift that tells you he notices. “You okay?” he murmurs, low enough that the others don’t hear. You should say yes. Should push down the thoughts clawing at your chest, the creeping fear that tells you this is a mistake, that you’re deluding yourself into thinking this can work, that you won’t get left behind in the wake of his future.
But your throat is tight. So you just force a smile, nodding once. Jake doesn’t buy it. His gaze lingers, sharp and searching, like he’s trying to figure you out. But before he can press, someone calls his name, dragging him back into the conversation, and you take the out for what it is. You breathe. And the doubt lingers. The room is still alive with conversation, laughter curling at the edges of words, but your mind is somewhere else. Distant. Tangled.
Jake is talking again something about next week’s game, about how they need to tighten their defense but the words barely reach you. They swirl around the room, carried by voices that belong in this world, that fit. And then there’s you. Sitting here, stomach heavy with something that feels like lead, pressing against your ribs, against your lungs. Because how does this work? How do you fit?
You glance at Jake from the corner of your eye. He’s leaning forward now, elbows resting on his knees, brows furrowed as he listens to Heeseung explain something about their last game. He’s so focused. So in his element, like this is exactly where he’s meant to be. And then there’s the baby. And you. Where do you fit in all of this? It was easy, easier when the thought of being pregnant was still something distant, something you were still getting used to. But now it’s real. You’ve seen the ultrasound. Heard the heartbeat. There’s something inside you, someone that’s growing, changing, becoming more real every single day. And Jake..
Jake is here. He’s showing up. He’s bringing you food and taking you to appointments and rubbing the back of his neck in that nervous way every time he catches himself looking at you for too long. But for how long? Because this is just college. This is before the contracts, before the NHL scouts come knocking, before his entire life shifts into something so much bigger than campus arenas and team dinners. You bite your lip, fingers curling into the fabric of your jeans. Jake loves hockey. It’s the one thing he’s never wavered on, the one thing that’s been steady, unwavering, untouchable.
And you, You’re just a detour. A pause in his story. A moment in time that he never planned for. He’s already stretched so thin. His schedule is already brutal. Morning practices, games, travel, training when would he even have time for you? For a baby? For late-night feedings and diaper changes and God, what were you thinking? This isn’t sustainable. This isn’t something that fits neatly into his world.
The realization crashes into you all at once, so heavy you almost feel sick. You need to talk to him. But then Jake laughs beside you, head thrown back, voice warm and unbothered, and when he looks at you, his smile is easy, soft. And for a second, just a second you wonder if maybe you’re wrong. Maybe he’s trying. Maybe he wants this. Maybe…
“Hey,” he murmurs, voice low, meant only for you. “You’re quiet.” You blink, jolted from your thoughts, your heart hammering against your ribs. You force a small smile. “Just tired.” Jake’s eyes linger for a second longer, like he doesn’t quite believe you. But then Jay nudges him, pulling him back into the conversation, and the moment is gone. And you, You’re still stuck wondering.
The night air is crisp when Jake pulls up in front of your dorm, the distant hum of campus life still lingering in the background, laughter from passing students, the occasional roar of a car engine down the street, the muffled bass of music from a party somewhere nearby. But inside the car, it’s just you and him.
The warmth of the heater hums softly, filling the silence that has stretched between you since you left the frat house. Jake’s hands are still wrapped loosely around the steering wheel, but he’s not in any rush to move. His eyes flick to you as you shift in your seat, your fingers curling and uncurling in your lap. “You want me to come in?” His voice is careful. Not forceful, not overbearing gentle. An offer. A quiet attempt to be there, to be with you.
You shake your head almost immediately. “No, it’s okay. I think I just wanna sleep.” The words leave your lips too quickly, too practiced, and you can tell by the way Jake’s brows furrow slightly that he catches it. That he knows you’re lying. He doesn’t call you out on it. He just exhales slowly, watching you for a long moment before nodding once. “Alright.” His fingers tap against the steering wheel, a restless little rhythm, like he wants to say more but doesn’t know how.
You push the car door open before he can change his mind and insist, before he can see through you too much. The cold air bites at your skin as you step out, pulling your jacket tighter around yourself. You feel Jake’s gaze on you as you turn back toward the car, gripping the edge of the door. “Thanks for the ride.” Jake gives a small nod, his lips pressing together. “Yeah. Of course.”
You linger. For some reason, you linger. Your fingers tighten around the door, the weight in your chest heavy and pulling.Like there’s something that wants to slip out, some small confession that’s buried too deep for you to name just yet. But then Jake shifts in his seat, glancing toward the windshield, and the moment shatters. You clear your throat, forcing a small smile. “Night, Jake.”
His lips twitch slightly, but the worry in his eyes doesn’t fade. “Night.” You shut the door and walk away before the doubt in your head can make you turn back.
Inside your dorm, it’s quiet. Too quiet. The air is still, untouched by Yuna’s usual presence—her music, her laughter, her constant, grounding presence that keeps you from feeling like you’re alone with your thoughts. But tonight, you are alone. You toe off your shoes and drop your bag by the door, shrugging off your jacket and letting it slip from your fingers onto the chair nearby. The room feels colder than usual, or maybe that’s just you.
You sit on the edge of your bed, fingers threading through your hair as you stare at the floor. The doubt is back. That creeping, suffocating feeling that has latched onto you ever since the conversation about hockey at dinner. How does this work? You feel like you’re standing at the edge of something. A reality you’re not prepared for, a future that you don’t know how to step into. Jake is here now. But what about when the season gets more intense? What about when the scouts come, when contracts are on the table, when suddenly he’s got offers from teams that are miles and miles away?
What about when the NHL swallows him whole and you and this baby become nothing more than a footnote in his history? Your fingers tremble slightly as you rest them against your stomach. It’s still flat, still unchanged, but you know you know something is growing, shifting, taking root inside you. And yet, you still don’t know where you fit in Jake’s life. Maybe he’s showing up now. Maybe he’s trying. But what if this, this thing between you was never meant to last? You press your lips together, blinking rapidly against the sting behind your eyes. You’re exhausted, your body heavy with the weight of your thoughts, but sleep won’t come easy tonight. 
It’s been a week. Seven days of silence. Seven days of unanswered texts, of ignored calls, of messages left on read. You knew it wouldn’t last forever, that eventually, Jake would force his way in. That he’d demand answers, refuse to let you keep pushing him away. But still, when the knock comes; sharp and insistent against your dorm door and  your stomach drops.
For a second, you think about pretending you’re not home. But then his voice comes through, firm but edged with something else. Something raw. “Open the door, please.”
You squeeze your eyes shut, fingers curling against the fabric of your hoodie. There’s no running from this. No delaying the inevitable. So you inhale, force your hands to stop shaking, and pull the door open. Jake is standing there, still in his practice gear, sweat dampening the strands of hair curling against his forehead, his hockey duffel slung over one shoulder. He must’ve come straight from the rink, must’ve been thinking about this the entire time because his eyes are already burning with frustration. “What the hell is going on?” he demands.
You cross your arms over your chest, stepping back just enough for him to push past you into the dorm. He does, kicking the door shut behind him, and suddenly the room feels too small. Too full of him. He turns to you, brows furrowed, jaw tight. “You’ve been ignoring me.” You scoff, arms tightening around yourself. “Yeah, well. Maybe that’s because I needed some space.”
Jake shakes his head, running a hand down his face. “Space from what? Me? The baby? This whole situation?” He exhales, something heavy behind it. “You think I don’t notice? You think I don’t know when something’s wrong with you?” You look away, fixing your gaze on the floor. “Jake—”
“No.” His voice cuts through the room, not loud, but firm. “Don’t do that. Don’t shut me out.” Your throat tightens. “I’m not shutting you out.”
“Then tell me what’s going on,” he says, stepping closer. “Tell me why you suddenly don’t want me around. Why are you acting like I’m already failing at something I haven’t even gotten the chance to do yet.” The words hit you like a blow, knocking the air from your lungs. You don’t mean to let it slip out, but suddenly, it’s there.The fear that’s been clawing at you, the doubt that’s been growing like a weed. “Because I don’t know if you can do it, Jake.” Silence.
His expression shifts, the frustration flickering into something else—hurt. You swallow hard, blinking against the sting in your eyes. “You might think you can handle it, but… this isn’t just a game, Jake. This isn’t a season, or a practice, or something you can walk away from if it gets too hard.” Your voice shakes, but you push forward. “This is a baby. A whole life. And you’re already stretched so thin. Your schedule is insane, your life is already moving in a direction that—” You shake your head, looking away. “What if I’m just setting myself up for disappointment?”
Jake exhales sharply, stepping closer again, forcing you to look at him. His eyes are stormy, filled with something desperate, something pleading. “I don’t know how to convince you,” he says, voice rough. “I don’t know how to make you believe me when I tell you that I want this. That I want to be here.” Your lip trembles, but you force yourself to hold his gaze. “You can’t just say it, Jake. You have to prove it.” Jake flinches like the words sting, like they land somewhere deep inside him. He presses his lips together, dragging a hand through his hair. “And how am I supposed to do that if you won’t even let me try?” The words linger between you, thick and heavy, suffocating the space between breaths. You don’t have an answer.
So you just whisper, “I need space.” Jake’s shoulders rise and fall with a slow, controlled breath, like he’s forcing himself to accept it. He nods once, lips pressing into a thin line. “Fine.” But then his voice softens, just barely. “I have an away game this weekend. I’ll be gone until Monday.” His eyes search yours, like he’s looking for something, anything to tell him you’re not slipping too far away. “But I’ll be back. And when I am, we’re talking about this.”
You nod, swallowing past the lump in your throat. “Okay.” Jake lingers for a moment, like there’s something else he wants to say. But instead, he just exhales, shoulders still tight with tension as he steps back toward the door. And then he’s gone. And the second the door clicks shut behind him, the weight in your chest pulls you under. 
The dorm is cloaked in darkness, save for the faint blue light spilling from the television screen. The glow flickers across the walls, illuminating the mess of blankets you’ve curled yourself into on the couch. The volume isn’t high, but it doesn’t need to be. The sound of the game filters in clearly, the scrape of skates on ice, the sharp whistles, the distant roar of the crowd.
You’d told yourself you wouldn’t watch. That you’d let the game pass without so much as checking the score. But now you’re here, heart hammering against your ribs, watching him. Jake. The camera zooms in as he weaves through the defense, his body moving like something fluid, something effortless. His hair is damp with sweat beneath his helmet, strands sticking to his forehead as he skates into position. He’s good. He’s so good.
You can see it in the way he moves, in the way the opposing team struggles to keep up. They’re aggressive, irritated because they know they can’t outplay him, so they’ll try to beat him down instead. And that’s exactly what they do. The hits tonight have been brutal. More than usual. It’s a grueling, ruthless game, bodies slamming against the boards with resounding cracks. The referees aren’t calling much, letting things slide, letting them play too rough.
And then, Sunghoon goes down. Your breath stutters as you watch him crash against the ice, his body crumpling on impact. He tries to get up, his gloved hands pressing against the rink, but something is wrong. His leg. You can tell immediately. The way he winces, the way his teammates circle him in concern, the way the trainer rushes onto the ice. The cameras cut in close. His face is tight with pain.
It takes two people to help him off the ice. Your stomach is twisted in knots, your hands clenched into fists. You hate this. You hate watching them get hurt like this. And then, Jake. He’s too fast, moving up the rink, his stick handling the puck with precision. The opposing team is trailing behind him, trying to keep up, trying to stop him.
They can’t. So one of them doesn’t even try. The moment it happens, you feel it, the wrongness. The guy comes in too fast. The check is too high, too hard, too reckless. And Jake never sees it coming. Your breath stops. Jake’s body is airborne before he crashes into the boards with a force that shakes the glass. The sound of it is sickening,a violent collision of bone, plexiglass, ice. His head snaps back. His helmet slams against the wall with a brutal crack. And then he slumps. He doesn’t move.
Your vision blurs. The game fades into the background, the commentators talking too calm, too casual as Jake remains still. His limbs are tangled awkwardly beneath him, his hand curled slightly over his side, his helmet tilted askew. He still hasn’t moved. Oh God. Move, Jake. Your stomach is in your throat, a sharp, rising panic clawing up your chest. Your hands are shaking. Your breath is coming too fast, too shallow, and you feel like you might be sick.
Then, slowly, he stirs. Not much, just a twitch of his fingers, a subtle shift in his shoulders. But it’s enough for the trainer to rush onto the ice, teammates circling him as he tries to push himself up. The camera zooms in, his face is twisted, his brows drawn together in pain.
His hand is gripping his ribs. Your throat tightens. You can see it, he’s hurting. Even as he shakes his head at the trainer, even as he tries to play it off. He’s trying to act fine, trying to prove he can keep going, but you know him. You can see through it. Jake’s not okay. Tears burn at your eyes, and you don’t even try to fight them. You don’t care that you’ve spent the last week avoiding him, don’t care that you’ve been drowning in doubts, don’t care that you still don’t have all the answers. Because none of it matters right now. Jake is hurt. You just want to be with him, you need to be with him. You have to get to him, and fast. 
You barely remember how you got there, your feet pounding the pavement in a haze, the world a blur of motion as you rushed toward the hospital. You’re too frantic to think, too scared to process anything more than the fact that Jake was hurt, hurt in a way you couldn’t ignore, couldn’t pretend didn’t matter. The lights from the hospital sign flicker above you as you stumble through the entrance, the sterile scent of antiseptic and disinfectant hitting you like a wall. Your heart is hammering, the fear sitting heavy in your chest as you make your way to the front desk, breath coming in short, sharp bursts.
"I—I’m looking for Jake Sim," you stutter, your voice shaky, too soft as you try to push past the thick knot of panic that clings to your throat. The receptionist eyes you, takes a moment to type something into her computer. “Room 214,” she says flatly, barely glancing up. “He’s being kept for observation.”
Room 214.
The number echoes in your head as you make your way down the hallway, the fluorescent lights overhead buzzing faintly. You can hear your pulse pounding in your ears, a steady thrum as you walk faster, too fast, the air around you seeming to constrict with every step. You reach the door. For a moment, you just stand there. Your hand is trembling as you push the door open, the sight of Jake in the bed almost too much to bear. His face is pale, too pale, and his eyes are closed, though he’s awake. He’s hooked up to an IV, his forehead glistening with a thin sheen of sweat.
He looks - fragile. Your breath catches in your throat as you step into the room, and it takes everything in you to swallow the rising lump of emotion that threatens to spill out. You’ve seen Jake take hits, seen him get back up from injury after injury. But this feels different. His head turns when he hears the door, his eyes opening slowly, a small smile curling on his lips when he sees you standing there.
“Hey,” he says, his voice rough but warm, like he’s trying to ease the tension in the air. His smile is weak, his usual confidence stripped away by the injury, but it’s still there. It’s still him.
“I’m so sorry, Jake,” you whisper, your throat tight. You move to his side, hovering for a second before reaching out to touch his hand, your fingers trembling against his. His skin is warm beneath your fingertips, the solid reassurance you’ve been craving, yet his grip feels fragile in a way you can’t quite shake.
“I didn’t mean to freak out like I did,” you murmur, your voice cracking. “I know you love the baby, and I know you’ll be there for them. I—I know you’ll be a good dad.” He lets out a soft sigh, his eyes softening as he looks at you. There’s a faint wince on his face as he shifts his weight, but the way his lips curl into something resembling a smile makes your heart ache.
“Baby,” he says, his voice low but steady, cutting through the tension that’s been hanging between you for days. “I used to think hockey was the world, that I lived for it, breathed for it. that it was my life. That hockey was the reason I woke up in the morning. I love hockey, hockey will always be my passion and it will always be what I want to do, and who i want to be. But it’s not my life. you are. you two are my life, you and this baby and I wouldn't want it any other way.” 
The words hit you like a punch to the chest, and your breath catches in your throat. You don’t even realize you’ve been holding your breath until the air rushes out in one long, shaky exhale. Jake’s hand reaches up, brushing a few strands of hair from your face, his touch gentle despite the pain he’s in. “I’ve been an idiot,” he says, his voice barely above a whisper. “I’ve been so focused on everything else, and I didn’t stop to think about what you needed. What we needed.”
Tears sting your eyes, a sudden rush of emotion overwhelming you. You hadn’t known how badly you needed to hear those words until they were out in the open. “Jake—” But he’s not letting you finish. He pulls you closer, gently, not forcefully, as though he’s afraid you might break. And when his lips meet yours, it’s soft, soft in a way that makes the world feel like it’s finally falling into place.
You close your eyes, the weight of everything you’ve been carrying melting away in an instant. His kiss is tentative at first, just the brush of his lips against yours, a delicate reassurance that he’s here. That he’s not going anywhere. But then, as if the words he’s spoken have unlocked something inside both of you, the kiss deepens, slow and aching, full of the longing that’s been building between you for weeks. The warmth of his lips against yours is the grounding force you needed to remind yourself that everything was going to be okay. You were going to be okay. He pulls back just enough to look at you, his gaze full of tenderness, full of something real.
“I’m not going anywhere, okay?” he murmurs. “I’m staying. I’m gonna be here for you, for the baby… for us.” The words resonate deep inside you, a wave of warmth flooding your chest. You don’t know what the future holds, but in this moment, you believe him. You lean your forehead against his, closing your eyes as the world seems to slow down. The hurt, the uncertainty, all of it seems to fade into the background, replaced by the steady rhythm of your hearts beating in sync.
“I love you,” you whisper. And this time, it’s not a question. It’s not something you’re trying to convince yourself of. It’s just the truth. He smiles, the familiar glint of something unbreakable in his eyes. “I love you, too.” In that moment, you realize that everything’s been leading to this, a moment of vulnerability, of surrender, of knowing that no matter what comes next, you’ve got each other. And maybe that’s all you really need.
AFTER. 
The baby shower is a blur of light and warmth, laughter, and the soft hum of happy conversations filling the air. The room is decorated with soft blues and yellows, little stuffed animals and pastel balloons drifting lazily overhead. It’s a cozy, intimate gathering. more like a family get-together than a grand celebration, and everything feels perfect. The air smells faintly of sweet pastries and flowers, and there’s an undeniable sense of anticipation hanging in the air, as if everyone is waiting for the moment when you and Jake’s little one will finally arrive.
Yuna is by your side, her bright smile radiating as she hands you a piece of cake, teasing you about cravings you’d been indulging in the past few months. You laugh along with her, feeling lighter than you have in ages. There’s a sense of peace in this room — a fleeting, magical calmness that you don’t want to end. Every now and then, your hand drifts to your swollen belly, gently pressing against the soft curve of it, as if the little life inside is dancing along to the rhythm of the moment.
Jake, ever the protective figure, is right by your side, his hand resting on the small of your back, his gaze never straying too far from you. His face, always so expressive, is filled with an emotion you can’t quite name, something soft, something cherishing. It’s hard to imagine a time when things were uncertain, when you wondered if he could be the father you needed, the partner you dreamed of. Because now, standing here with him, you know the truth. He’s already there. Already doing everything he can to show you he’s in this for the long haul.
“Do you need anything?” Jake asks, his voice low, full of the kind of care that only someone who loves you like he does can muster. You shake your head, the warmth from his touch making your heart swell. It’s moments like these, quiet, simple moments that remind you how far you’ve come from the uncertainty you once felt. How far you’ve both come.
“Just you,” you smile up at him, the words coming out without a second thought, and he grins at you like it’s the best compliment he could ever receive.
The guests are all mingling now, with the occasional burst of laughter ringing out as the game ideas you and Yuna came up with take full effect. Everyone is gathered around, exchanging baby gifts, newborn clothes, soft blankets, bottles, stuffed animals. Your friends and family are here, laughing and celebrating this new chapter of your life. The people you love most are sharing this with you. And even though there’s a bittersweet ache in your chest, because Sunghoon is absent, recovering from that god-awful injury, there’s a deep sense of thankfulness that wraps around you like a warm blanket.
“Hey,” Jake says, breaking you from your thoughts. His voice is so gentle, his hand finding yours in the crowd. “I need to step outside for a minute. I’ll be right back, okay?”
You nod, watching as he slips through the door. You know he’s been feeling the weight of everything lately, the pressure of balancing his career, school, and this new role as a soon-to-be father. You trust him to make it all work, to prove to you that he can handle the responsibilities. But there’s a piece of you, a vulnerable part, that still worries. The doubts always seem to rise like whispers in the back of your mind.
“Win or lose; I want to come home to you,” Jake had said to you not long ago, those words echoing in your memory like a melody. They settle in your heart like a promise, something real, something that matters. The door opens softly, and you look up to see Jake reentering the room, his eyes catching yours immediately. His smile, though small, is genuine, and you feel your breath catch in your chest. The way he looks at you, the way his hand rests against your back once more as he steps closer. it’s as if he’s still trying to wrap his mind around the miracle of everything that’s happening.
“We’re gonna be okay, right?” he asks, his voice full of tenderness, vulnerability slipping in beneath the surface. You nod slowly, your hand resting over your belly as you meet his gaze. “We already are, Jake. I already know we are.” The words settle between you both, and for a brief moment, the noise of the party fades into the background. All that matters is this. this feeling of being connected, being here, in this moment, together. The baby, the future, it’s all a little clearer now.
Jake’s hand slides to your waist, pulling you just a little closer as he presses a soft kiss to your forehead. The room seems to hum around you, the laughter and chatter distant, but in this small space between the two of you, the world feels as if it’s standing still. Everything has changed. The uncertainty, the doubts, the fear. it’s all been replaced by the certainty of one truth: You’re in this together. And when you see Jake’s face soften with that same familiar warmth, you know it’s true. He’s here. He’s home. “Win or lose,” he whispers, echoing the words he had said to you weeks ago. “I’ll always come home to you.”
Your heart swells in your chest, the weight of his promise settling deep inside you. And in that moment, you know it’s all going to be okay.
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reg taglist. (★) @izzyy-stuff , @beomiracles , @dawngyu , @hyukascampfire , @saejinniestar , @notevenheretbh1 , @hwanghyunjinismybae, @ch4c0nnenh4, @kristynaaah
series taglist. (★) @saejinniestar , @vixialuvs , @slut4hee , @xylatox , @skyearby @m1kkso @jakeswifez @heartheejake @hommyy-tommy @yunverie @lalalalawon
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delulumel ¡ 25 days ago
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Jungwon!bf x f!reader
Trope: established relationship, smut with some plot, a little bit of angst, fluff
Warnings: smut 18+ MDNI , p in v, praise, degrade, spanking, rough sex, fingering, no protection (don’t do it), breeding. Tell me if I forgot something.
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The apartment is quiet when Jungwon finally gets home, his jacket slung over his shoulder, exhaustion lining his frame. He’s barely spoken all week, lost in his own head and you’ve had enough.
“You’re late.” you say from the couch.
He pauses, blinking at you like he’s surprised you are still awake. “Yeah, sorry.”
You stand crossing your arms. “That’s it?”
Jungwon sighs, running a hand through his hair. “What do you want me to say?”
“I want you to talk to me.” you snap, stepping closer. “You’ve been ignoring me for days.”
His eyes darkened, flickering over your face—annoyance, frustration, then something hotter. “You want my attention?” He murmurs, tilting his head. “Then take it.”
The challenge in his voice sends a thrill down your spine, but you don’t back down. “Or what?”
Jungwon moves fast, crowding you against the wall, his hands gripping your waist. “Or I’ll make you.”
It all happened fast. His mouth crashes into yours, all teeth and desperation. You moan into the kiss, arching against him. He’s rough, biting your lip hard enough to hurt and you whimper—not in pain, but in need.
“That’s it,” he growls, pulling back just enough to see your face. “You’ve been waiting for this haven’t you? Acting all pissy just so I would fuck you?”
You gasp as his hand slides between your thighs, fingers pressing hard over your clothed cunt. “N-no—”
“Liar.” His grip tightens and you squirm. “You love this. You love winding me up until I can’t think straight.”
You whine as he yanks your pants down, fingers slipping beneath your panties to find you already soaked, he chuckles. “Pathetic. You’re dripping all over my hand, like the little slut you are.”
“I should punish you, don’t you think? Your behaviour is unacceptable.” Your eyes widened, you opened your mouth to protest but he interrupted you.
“You are gonna count to three for me, okay?” He said while bending you over the table.
You quickly feel a sting on your ass. “O-one.” you almost forgot, tears picking at your eyes.
Another slap.
“T-two.” you stutter, the stinging sensation turned into pleasure.
Another slap. “Louder.”
“T-three.” You moaned.
He hums, rubbing the redness away before dragging your panties down. “Good girl.”
The praise makes your stomach flip. Then his fingers are pushing inside you, curling just right and you are moaning, rocking back against his hand.
“Fuck, you are so tight.” He groaned, adding a second finger. “Gonna take my cock so well, baby. Gonna make you scream.”
You are already close, thighs shaking but he pulls his fingers out, ignoring your frustrated noise.
“Not yet,” He tuts, unbuckling his belt. “You don’t get to come until I say so.”
When he finally pushes into you, it’s with one brutal thrust, filling you completely. You gasp, nails digging into the table as he sets a punishing pace, each snap of his hips driving you higher.
“That’s it.” He pants, gripping your hair to yank your hair back. “Take it. You wanted me to fuck you? Then take it.”
You’re sobbing now, overstimulated but desperate for more and when his hand slips around to rub your clit, you shatter, clenching around him as you come.
Jungwon follows soon after, groaning your name as he spills inside you, his body collapsing over yours.
-
Later, he gathers you against his chest, his fingers tracing patterns in your skin. “You okay?” He murmurs, voice softer now. You nod, exhausted and he presses a kiss to your temple—a silent promise that the roughness was another kind of worship.
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A/S: On my period but still thinking about smut😭Hope you like it my horny besties.💋 If you see any typos, pretend it isn’t there.
455 notes ¡ View notes
delulumel ¡ 25 days ago
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── ☁️ ๑ Private Lessons ๑
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𝑓𝑜𝑙𝑑𝑒𝑟 ¹ ・・・ when your coworker asks you to take her client for the night, you couldn’t pass up the big payout. unfortunately for you it happens to be your college professor. you somehow end up with a very private lesson on being a good girl.
꒰ 𝓢ubject ꒱ ──── 𝓟rofessor! 𝓗yunjin x 𝓕em.ᐟreader ༘⋆ ‎g. smut cw. unprotected sex, student-teacher relations, age gap , oral (m receiving), hyunjin so dom in this, marking/biting, a dash of breeding kink, slight podophilia?, dacryphilia wc. 4.2k ┈┈┈ Ӄfiles ₊꒷꒦˚ ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛ ғᴏʀᴍ +
Ӄai’s ¿? i had to force myself to put the pen down.
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take my appointment tonight.
no. 
yn please !! Felix finally asked me out and I can not throw away this chance.
How exactly am I supposed to go on a date with a man who knows you and wants you specifically?
Great news! He is a new client, so it doesn’t matter who goes. Plus he is offering a lot …
Fine… you owe me.
I love you!!!!
You actually couldn’t believe that you agreed to this. You much rather be home working on that paper you have yet to start on. You groan, stepping out of the uber, mumbling a quick thank you as you make your way to the front doors. You never knew this building was an art gallery, you drove past this building many times never paying any mind to how gorgeous it was. The door man gives you a smile asking for your invite. You slip it out your small purse handing it to him with a returning smile, he scans it nodding his head, opening the doors for you. The gallery was elegant, you were almost thankful the client sent a dress for the occasion.
The dress was beautiful, an ivory dress with beautiful beading and embroidery flowers running over your body like a sash. Your heels click against the tile floors, scanning peoples faces. You weren't sure who you were looking for, you were just kind of hoping they would kind of find you. One of the wait staff offered you a glass of champagne which you graciously accepted. You nurse your drink walking towards a piece on the wall that caught your eye. As you continue to observe it, a hand grazes your back. “There you are, I have been looking for you.” You stiffen, but not from the hand on your back or his breath fanning your ears. No, it was his voice. You knew that voice. Quickly turning your head to the side, you are face to face with none other than your art professor.  
“Mr. Hwang?” you say eyes wide, you always thought Mr. Hwang was handsome in his teaching attire but seeing him in a suit and tie was something you never thought you needed to see. You were glad the blush on your cheeks was hidden behind your makeup. 
“Miss YN? What are you doing here? This is an invite only event.” He asks you almost like he was accusing you for sneaking in or something.
“I was invited, Mr. Hwang, I am just waiting for my date. What about you?” You ask, taking a sip of your wine, trying to hide your embarrassment behind the glass. 
“I am also waiting for my date, which I thought was you because you have almost the exact same dress.” He glances up and down inspecting the dress's detail now that he was up close. You watch his face morph into an expression you haven’t seen on him before and he lets out a small chuckle. “That is actually the exact dress I sent to her.” 
You force a smile on your face, scared to even imagine the possibility of your teacher ordering an escort. 
“Hyunjin!” A woman' s voice pulls you out of your mind. Mr. Hwang quickly pulls you close to him, whispering in your ear “Play along.”
“Ms. Kim, Sorry I was looking for my girlfriend.” His hand grazes the small of your back turning to give you a smile. 
“Oh. I didn’t know you were seeing someone.” She glances your way, eyes showing a slight disgust towards you.
“Yes, so if you excuse us I have some people I would like to introduce her to.” Mr. Hwang laces his hand into yours pulling you away from the woman who was looking rather pissed.
“She seems lovely.” You let him lead you around the corner, pulling you into the wall as he blocks you in. From the outside it might look like a couple who can't keep their hands to themselves but the way Mr. Hwang was looking at you nothing of the sort.
“What are you doing here for real Miss YN.” 
You cross your arms looking at him. “It's really none of your business. You can’t control me outside the classroom.” 
He reaches up with one of his hands grabbing your jaw, “Glad to know you still have that smart mouth outside the classroom.” He lets go after he takes in your shocked face, stepping back grabbing his phone he pulls up a screen turning it to show you. You glance and see your companies website 
“I never would have taken you as someone who would get an escort.” You stand a little straighter, voice a little softer. This was the guy who was paying you and now you really need to put on your best behavior, even if he is the teacher you despise the most. 
“For situations like this, it’s easier than asking someone on the side of the road. Just play the part as the girlfriend, and you have knowledge about some of the stuff they are auctioning off. Make a good impression.” 
“What’s this event even for? And why is a professor here of all places? No offense Mr. Hwang but can you even afford this? You know with your teacher salary.” 
Mr. Hwang's head falls down slightly, shaking it as he lets out a small laugh. “I’m so much more than just a teacher, Miss Yn. I’ve lived a life before you even met me.” 
Before you can get another word in, Mr. Hwang checks his watch “Let’s go, we have some mingling to do. Remember what I told you.” He reaches out his hand waiting for you to accept it. You glance from his hand to his face, the glasses on his face sitting perfectly on the bridge of his nose. The smile on his face reaching his eyes with another emotion you haven't quite placed. You place your hand into his as he leads you back into the crowd.
It's been a few hours of the small touches you and Mr. Hwang were giving each other throughout the night to appear as a couple who were in love. You were talking to a woman named Sana who you met in the auction room, who you somehow convinced to purchase a piece that you knew was worth more than she purchased it for. 
“Gosh I’m so jealous you were able to get that piece, it has a beautiful story behind it.” you say picking at the bowl of pretzels you both are sharing.
“Do tell.” She says, sipping her drink, waving at the bartender to get us both another round.
“Well of course it's all folktales but basically it's a story of a man who was cursed with 1,000 lives. He was never told how to break the curse and he wasn’t sure what would happen when he reached his thousand. When he reached his 999th life he met a woman, she wasn’t the richest or the smartest but she was the prettiest he had ever laid eyes on. He started doing everything he can to get her parents approval but as a man who has to start over many times in many places he didn’t have much. He knew the girl loved pretty things, especially these beautiful ivory flowers that bloomed only once a year on the highest mountain. So when the time came, he set off to gather those flowers. The journey was long and treacherous but he eventually got them, when he made his way back to the village it was unfortunately too late.”
“What why? Was she married off?”
“No, she passed. It said that she was on a hunt for a bird egg in a high tree. A bird that the man had as a pet when he was younger. When the man heard of the news his heart broke.”
“Then what happened.” Mr. Hwang's voice rings out from behind you. 
“Yes then what happened?”
“Nobody knows. That's why the bird's nest is filled with those ivory flowers, and that’s why it's empty. We don't know.”
“What the fuck kind of story is that? Beautiful? You have a weird definition of beautiful yn.” Sana says laughing out, chugging down the rest of her drink. “But thank you for the story, I'll definitely look at that painting in a new light. It was lovely to meet you and it was nice seeing you once again Hyunjin. Bring her to the club once and a while. It would be nice to have another girl to talk to.” Sana slides out the chair reaching into her purse sliding her card towards you. “Call me if he ever lets you out alone. Hiding a gem from the rest of us. Jihyo would love her.” 
Mr. Hwang laughs., “Yeah she would probably try to take her from me. But we will talk about it. Have a good night Sana.” 
Sana waves at you both leaving Mr. Hwang next to you. “You ready?” He extends his hand. Mr. Hwang leads you to the front where his car is already waiting. Mr. Hwang opens the door helping you in. The ride was quiet, you just take in the building lights shining brightly outside. 
“Thank you.” 
You turn to face him with a confused look on your face, “for?” 
“For tonight, even though you were paid. I had fun, and it was actually impressive that you got Sana to buy art. She is more interested in jewels.” Mr. Hwang lets out an airy laugh. 
“You seem to know Sana well?” 
“Jealous?” he gives you a quick glance, his lips twitching into a small smirk.
“No, curious. You don’t really talk about yourself in the classroom.” 
“That's mostly because you and your friends like to give me a hard time. Plus I doubt you want to hear about this old guy's life. It’s rather boring.”
“Well getting a little glance into it, it doesn’t seem that boring.”
Mr. Hwang shrugs “Maybe.” 
You both fall into a comfortable silence when his voice comes out again. “Are you hungry?”
“Oh, it’s okay, plus it's passed our agreed time frame. I couldn't.”
“I’m not asking you as YN the escort, I’m asking as a concerned man in a car with a girl whose stomach is extremely loud to the point I can hear it.” 
You roll your eyes, “If it's not too much, I would love to eat.”
“Perfect, I know a great place.” 
You didn’t expect the place to be Mr. Hwang's house. You never imagined you sitting on a bar stool as you watch him cooking away in the kitchen. He insisted on cooking, saying no places would be open this late. Now you watch him, with his button down sleeves rolled up revealing his toned arms. The apron he has on is bright against the black and white attire he was wearing. Every once and awhile he would push up his glasses as they slowly slide down his nose. 
His house was something you thought you needed to imagine but now that you think about it, it's exactly what you would think. Papers scattered all over the coffee table, blankets tossed over the couches. Photos of people you saw at the auction and haven't seen before on his shelves. You get up from your seat walking to the shelf finding photo of what you assume is Mr. Hwang and his college friends holding their diplomas with giant smiles on their faces. You scan the assortment of books on his shelves and his art along the walls.
“Come eat.” He calls out from the kitchen, setting down a plate where you last were sitting. “Do you want something to drink? I have water, tea, beer, and juice?” 
“Water is fine.” 
While you ate you both kept a flow of conversations to fill in the silence. You couldn't believe you were having a conversation with him without his snark remarks. You found yourself laughing at his jokes and being engaged in his stories. Soon enough you both ended up on the couch both drinking a bottle of wine that he popped open. You weren’t sure if it was the buzz of the wine finally hitting your system or the way he was staring at you but you leaned in, planting a kiss on his lips. Shocked, you quickly pulled back, mumbling an apology when he reached out behind your neck pulling you back into him.
“Can you help me take off my glasses?” his breath fanning against your lips. You reach out pulling his glasses off his face as he pulls you in for a kiss. The kiss was hesitant at first, he slowly leaned back to look at your face. The blush on your cheeks fanning across your faces, "I wanted to do that all night.” he places another quick kiss on your lips, slowly making his way down your jaw and kissing below your earlobe. The small moan that slips out doesn't go unnoticed by him as he sucks light marks onto your neck. 
You let go of the tight grip you had on his glasses, bringing the back of your hand to your mouth trying to muffle the moans you are letting out. 
“No baby, let me hear. You are always so vocal in class, let me hear it.” His voice vibrates against your neck as he makes his way down kissing your collarbone and going down to the neck of your dress. His hands softly graze up and down your exposed thigh. You sigh when he reaches back up to your neck sucking harder. When his face finally reaches back up to you he kisses the side of your lips. Hand coming up rubbing his thumb against your lips, you part your lips tongue slightly touching the pad of this thumb. He lets out a small groan.
“Do you wanna be a good girl and let me show you how to use your mouth instead of testing me in my classroom?” 
You nod, as he grabs a small pillow placing it between his spread legs. He grabs your hand leading you between him. “I forgot to tell you but you look so beautiful tonight, and right now. Come on, pretty, kneel for me.” 
You slowly drop to your knees, hands on your lap, waiting as he slowly unbuttons his shirt exposing his chest and stomach. You watch in awe with how tone he actually is underneath all the sweaters and ties he wears to school. You must have been gaping for a while when he decides to speak out.
“Do I need to teach you how to give me a blowjob?” 
He leans over in front of your face, a surprised look on your face.
 “No. I can do it.” you say pushing his shoulders back so his back is on the couches back. He places one hand behind his head as he keeps his eyes on you. You reach out to slacks unbuttoning them. You were so eager to see him, yes you talked about how big he was to your friends. Many of the girls did, Mr. Hwang was gorgeous, smart and kind. Many wanted him, but here you are about to suck him off.
Mr. Hwang lefts up his hips as you pull down his slacks along with his boxers. His dick springs free, slapping against his abdomen. He hisses out when you grab the base of him, laying your tongue flat against the bottom of his shaft, licking your way all the way to the tip. You feel his body stiffen and relax when you place him in your mouth. You continue your way down getting as far as you can, your hand covering the parts that your mouth can’t take. You hollow out your cheeks, bobbing your head up and down. 
With your other hand you reach out your hand to touch his exposed hip, gripping harshly as you try to swallow him whole. His head falls back as he lets out a breathy groan, it is music to your ears as you rub your thighs together trying to relieve yourself. You let out a moan against him, He quickly reaches his hand behind your head grabbing your hair pulling you back. You slide off his dick with a quick pop before he stands up pulling you to stand on your knees. 
A few quick breaths in you are back onto him, this time Mr. Hwang forces himself deeper into your throat, moaning up at the ceiling with the warmth and wetness of your mouth. His head falls back down seeing your big eyes, glossy, staring back up to him. 
He feels hot against your tongue, throat contrasting against him as your swallow, soft moans vibrating as he refuses to move. His hand slowly caresses your cheek with a grin on his lips. 
“Now if this is a way to get you to shut the fuck up in class i might have to start giving you private lessons.” you feel him press his hips further into you, tears threatening to fall. And as the first tear slides down your cheeks he begins to thrust harshly into your mouth. The noises of you gagging around him and the grunts he is letting out, make your head dizzy. Mr. Hwang’s rhythm begins to become erratic and sloppy, the grip on your hair becoming tighter. 
You are sharply being pressed into him, with a loud moan as you feel his hot cum fill your mouth, he stalls for a moment as he pulls out of you. “Let me see.” He lifts your chin as you open your mouth showing him the mixture of his cum and your saliva. Mr. Hwang bends over slightly letting his own saliva slide out mouth dropping it down into yours. You watch as he continues to observe, the mixture slowly falling out the corners of your mouth.
“You can swallow now baby.” His voice was soft as he helped you off the floor, eyes never leaving you. You open your mouth showing him that you swallowed everything. He buries his face into your neck once again leaving dark marks over the previous ones. 
“Jump.” his voice muffled between your skin and his kisses, you jump, his hands fly to the bottom of your thighs face never leaving your neck. He turns leading you both to his room. 
He slowly lowers you into the bed, hovering on top of you as his mouth kissing all over your face.
“Youre so freaking beautiful.” he places a kiss on your lips, deepening it as your hands grip the back of his neck pulling into you.
He pulls back, hands reaching under your dress pulling down your panties in a quick motion. You both climb higher onto the bed as you both fumble with your dress, getting frustrated, he rips the front of the dress. Nipples perking up at the cold air hitting them.
“Mr. Hwang.” you gasp out as he went straight for your breast sucking your nipple into his mouth. 
“Hyunjin. Call me Hyunjin.” He says against your skin switching his focus on the other one, and he kneads the one he just left. 
You moan out his name, feeling even more excited with calling him his first name. Hyunjin ruts against your thigh hearing his name fall so prettily from your mouth. Hyunjin pulls away from your breasts looking at the red splotches he left scattered around your body. He looks back up to you, you were really something out of a movie. Pupils blown, chest rising and falling, hair a mess across his pillows, he always thought you were pretty but right now in this moment you were so breath taking, he wanted to frame this moment. 
“Please hyunjin.” you whine out, hands grabbing at this waist trying to get him to bury himself into you. 
“Please what baby?” Hyunjin grabs one of your legs, lifting it over his shoulder, kissing your inner thighs, slowly moving down to your feet, placing a kiss at your ankle, the arch of your foot. Your back arches off the bed with his lips making connection with your foot again letting out a moan. 
“Oh, are your feet that sensitive? Does that feel good baby?” He kisses at your heel then at the flat of your feet. Your toes arch at the sensation you feel across your body. The feeling was so overstimulating you felt it on your lower back. You choke out a moan, as the pleasure builds up in your eyes, slowly falling out. Hyunjin groans as he watches you cry out his name. 
He places your leg back over his shoulder, kissing at your tears on your cheeks. 
“Don’t worry pretty, I'll make you feel so good.” he says as he rubs himself over your wet entrance, coating himself in your wetness before he aligns himself at your core. Hyunjin slowly pushes in letting your body get used to his size. Your moans dance around each other as he slowly begins to thrust into you, every thrust back into you goes deeper and deeper until he stops when you reach the bottom. He falls into your neck, sucking at the spot of your collarbone before licking it. Hyunjin bites straight down, as you moan out and he pulls out thrust harshly into you. 
All the stimulation to your body has more tears leaving your eyes, mouth fully open gasping on air as he pounds into you. Hyunjin can feel the way you tighten and relax against his dick. Hyunjin pops up looking at your face giving you a kiss to the side of your face. 
‘Fuck you feel so good baby. Like you were made for me.” he moans out, thrusts never faltering. 
Your nails scraping against his back only added more pleasure to hyunjin. His name comes out of your lips like a prayer being repeated over and over again. You thrust up your hips to meet his, earning a deep groan in the back of his throat. 
“I- I’m close Hyunjin.” Your words fighting against the gasps that leave your mouth. 
Hyunjin doesn’t reply to you, but you can tell by the way he thrusts into you harder and faster that he has to be just as close. His hand reaches between you rubbing circles around your clit, the sensation surprises, vision turning white as you gasp, cumming. 
“Hyunjin’s hand continues to rub circles around your clit only faster and hasher. Your back arching off the bed as you feel the pleasure build up again.
“Another one, please god YN please another one.” He watches the way your face morphs back into pleasure as he becomes sloppy with his thrusts and hands. 
Before you can get a word out about cumming, you felt a weird snap and a gush come out of you. Hyunjin watches as you squirt all over this stomach, dripping down onto the bed. Your pussy fluttering around his dick, where he feels his restraint snap as well, cumming right into you. You moan as you feel him fill you up, the overstimulation being too much for you now.
Hyunjin presses his forehead onto yours whispering “god you were such a good girl for me.“ he slowly pulls out, you could feel your combined juices flush right out to you. Hyunjin uses his fingers to push the leaking cum right back into you earning a mix of a moan and whimper.
“Holy shit you are perfect.” he gets up gathering a towel to help clean you up and then dressing your tired body in some of his clothes pulling you in next to him. Falling asleep to your little breaths.
It's been a couple of days since you saw Hyunjin, nerves start to fill your body as you make your way to his classroom. You peek in the door scanning the room for your professor. 
“Dude the fuck you get attacked by?” jeongin comes up from behind you pulling down your jacket. You swat his hand away from you turning back into the room seeing the coast is clear. As you walk to your seat you see a wrapped box laying on it. 
“Why is there a huge box on your desk YN?” Jeongin asks taking his spot behind you. 
‘I don't know” you mummer out. Picking up the note smiling to yourself as you read it.
‘I told you Sana loved jewels more, luckily for you I had something she wanted so this is for you. Dinner tonight?’ 
“Alright class, let's take our seats and get started.” Hyunjin's voice rings across the classroom, your eyes meet and he gives you a smile turning to get the lesson started.
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519 notes ¡ View notes
delulumel ¡ 27 days ago
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ď´ž insane in the brain
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pairing: ghostface!kim seungmin & ghostface!yang jeongin x f!reader
genre: one-shot, horror au, smut
word count: 17,1K
warnings: yandere!seungmin & yandere!jeongin ⋆ dom!seungmin & dom!jeongin & sub!reader⋆ mention of a violent act! ⋆ story is set in the 90s ⋆ obsessive behavior ⋆ stalking! ⋆ little!mxm action ⋆ threesome! ⋆ phone sex ⋆ dirty talk ⋆ mask!kink ⋆ voice!kink ⋆ biting! ⋆ hair!pulling ⋆ marking ⋆ overstimulation ⋆ squirting! ⋆ ass!slapping⋆ small!degrading ⋆ 69!position ⋆ f!masturbation ⋆ oral (f. and m. receiving) ⋆ cunnilingus ⋆ face sitting! ⋆ mating press!position ⋆ unprotected!sex ⋆ multiple creampies! (and yeah…that’s all i think…)
summary: a masked killer returns to the town, leaving you terrified, paranoia seems to follow you everywhere you go, along with two of your classmates, who seem to grow very fond of you…
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His chest heaved, nose flaring as he pushed away the strands of hair from his eyes. His gaze was glaring, piercing, eyes formed into slits, watching the pair, just a few feet away from him. The look of disgust was unmistakable on his face and his glasses, along with his longer, blond hair thankfully shield him from the view of anyone passing by. He blended into the background, like always — unseen. He didn’t have to worry about anyone hearing his screaming thoughts. He was almost sneering, teeth gritting against each other, when he saw the guy pushing your hair behind your ear and he had to dig his nails into the wall by the act — disgusting.
You didn’t feel the immense stare, attention fully on the guy infront of you as you listened to his every word. Your lips stretched into a smile, leaning on your still closed locker, fingers playing with the strap of your bag. You didn’t know much about the guy infront of you, not that much like the person peaking from behind the corner...You were so unaware of your surroundings sometimes. You just came from your last class today, boring and to be honest quite unnecessary, but it gave you some time to perfect the text on the papers that were peaking out of your bag.
You said a small goodbye to your friends after your last class, already putting on your headphones on your ears, not wanting to hear any conversation around you as you pushed the button on your Walkman. Today was overstimulating, like any other, since you transferred to this school, but those fliers in your hands really helped you keep your mind off things. You made your way straight to the bulletin board, putting up on of the papers in your hands and in your state of unconsciousness, you were quite surprised by someone tapping you on the shoulder. Jake — one of the football players, quite sweet, giving the big smile on his face.
He was charming in a way and you found yourself not caring too much, when his tone of voice became deeper, huskier, not really looking like the party you were putting the fliers up for was the thing, why he started the conversation. However when you walked a few steps back to your locker, you were stopped by him, not being able to maybe cut the conversation short as he blocked it with his own body. It was no use to fight him. Your eyes drifted back from him to your locker and then back the nearly empty hallway, as the man before you finally stepped back a little. “See you at the party.” You said, smiling up at him, nodding.
There was no way that anyone could have missed the obvious glimmer in his eyes, when he gave you a one last smile, before leaving your side. A puff of air left you at that, turning to your locker to finally get your things. It wasn’t that long ago since you transferred in to this small town, already making couple of good friends. The party, which you were putting up fliers up for wasn’t your idea at all. You were just manipulated by your dear friend and her boyfriend to help them set this thing up, but in some way it could really help you settle down in a way…
You slammed your locker’s door shut, turning swiftly, but you only bumped into something — someone. “Oh, my god–“ You were startled for the second time, your books becoming slippery in your full hands, before they all fell to the ground with a loud slap! Your eyes immediately darted to the person you had bumped into, but you were surprised by them instantly kneeling down to pick your books up. “I’m sorry.” You said, sheepishly, kneeling down before them to pick up your things.
“It’s okay.” You looked up at the quiet sound of their voice. You recognized him — Jeongin, a quiet guy in your class. Black, rimmed glasses frame his eyes, sharp, just like his high cheekbones. You have never seen him outside of the classroom and definitely haven’t heard him talk before either. You lips parted a little, eyes going over his shaggy, blond hair, not even realizing him gathering your last book, only his own stare shaked you from your trance.
Something about his stare made shivers run down your spine, it was so…different from his whole body language and behavior. “Thank you–“ You trailed off, tearing your eyes away from his to the books in his hold. You grabbed them, missing how his long fingers reached after yours, like he wanted to graze his naked skin over yours. Your cheeks flushed still, embarrassed a little by your clumsiness and also because you could still hear the soft sound of music coming from your headphones. Your hand fumbled with the cable, shutting the suddenly embarrassing song off, before standing up. He didn’t follow your move immediately, like he was struck, glaring up at you for a few seconds, before slowly pulling himself up. “Jeongin, right?” You didn’t even know where the sudden need to talk came from and it was clear by your furrowed eyebrows.
He nodded after a few seconds, shakily pushing his glasses up his nose. “Yes…” He said, looking at you with big eyes.
You really didn’t know what came over you — just few minutes before that you were screaming to be taken from the conversation with Jake. It was probably, because you thought you would maybe safe this awkward situation, but you only seemed to make it worse. Your eyes went to the paper on top of your books, turning it for him to see. “You going to the party?” You asked, trying to diffuse the unbearable tension.
He didn’t even look at the flyer, eyes fully on your face and it made you tremble. His stare was tense, not even blinking, so he wouldn’t miss your micro expressions. “Not really my style.” Jeongin stated, eyebrows twitching and taking unnecessary amount of time to voice out the full sentence. You were almost scared by what he was going to say, with the deep breaths he took between each word.
Your lips parted, before pressing them into a tight smile. Even if you knew from your short glances that he was quite shy, you were really the one fidgeting in your spot at that moment. “Oh, okay then…see ya-“ You said, heart beating suddenly so fast at the sudden drop in his expression that you thankfully didn’t see much off as you darted away from him.
────
You really do have to take a deep breath at the memory. The more you thought of it, the more you realize what a weird vibe he had. So tense, eyes so piercing and the way they didn’t shift away from you — it was like he was tearing you apart, calculating your every move and twitch. Other than these few specks of memory, you didn’t think much about it. You only thought of it, because you thought of Jake — the guy that was supposed to be here, at this time and place, right here with you. How could you possibly be so naive to think that he would actually appear, because of you? With your eyes trailing over the room, it is obvious that you truly aren’t standing out, but maybe it is a good thing. Though…that is just yourself telling you that.
The cheap, plastic cup in your hand was already empty, your mind fuzzy enough to let you know that it was enough of the liquid gasoline. You saw multiple people pouring many different types of liqueur in the punch and you hope that you won’t be lying on the floor by the end of the night. Your good friend handed you the drink with a sweet smile, only grimacing with you at the awfully strong taste of alcohol. It wasn’t even sweet anymore, just pure bitterness and only one cup of it was enough — that can’t be said the same for your friend.
Your eyes go to the small dancefloor, small, drunken laugh falling from your lips at your friend, who spins wildly. Her boyfriend didn’t look much different from her, eyes already teary and heavy, looking back and forth between her and his friend, dressed as their team’s mascot. You can’t imagine the heat in that thing, you yourself sweating just in your miniskirt and tank top. The whole room was foggy and hot from the few people smoking in the back of the room and the heavy bodies grinding against each other. The party for sure turned out pretty well in a sense of attendance.
You scrunch up the cup in your hand, so out of your body that you even lick of the small bits of alcohol left around the rim. You were so thirsty, sweaty and gross that you somehow didn’t even care anymore. You surely weren’t looking the worst, you think, while looking across the room again. You weren’t even bored that much, enjoying your time analyzing the room that swirled wildly around you. Your gaze finds your friend again, her body now hanging lazily on her boyfriend who rubs her back softly, while laughing with the guy in the costume. Though by being so drunk and the room being so dark, you didn’t firstly register the dark clothed figure in the corner of the room.
The white, outline of what you think was its face stands out in the dark corner. The figure was clad in a black cloth, hood on its head and it even more emphasized its ghoulishly, big eyes and gaping mouth. Its face looks so out of place you can’t do anything, but stare into its eye sockets. Your whole body stills as you see it tilt its head. You know that it was definitely a person under the mask, but the simple gesture made you tremble. You feel uneasiness creep up onto you, the feeling of its glare making your skin crawl. The way it — the person just stood there, with around people who were laughing, dancing and simply happy, made the whole mood in the room change into something sour and bitter.
Your mind is probably playing tricks on you, maybe you are even imagining the whole thing. However even if you can’t see the person’s face, you just know they are staring right back at you. You have to wonder for how long. Maybe it was spying on you since the moment you stepped inside the house. Your eyes trail painfully over the figure, swallowing the lump in your throat. No one other than you seem to notice the figure. Maybe it is someone they all now, no need to introduce you.
You are suddenly startled, when a pair of hands touch your arm, jumping immediately in your spot. Your heart beats faster as you turn your head to the direction of the owner’s hands, only meeting the messy state that your friend was. The relief that washes over you is big, your hair thankfully blocking the masked figure, letting you take a full look at your friend. “I wanna go home–“ She pouts at you, whining, while digging her long nails into your arm.
You think you have never actually been happier to hear those words. “Okay, let me just use the restroom and I’ll be right back–“ To be honest you don’t want to go anywhere alone right now, but you are in desperate need of washing away the fright and sweat off your face.
Your friend is already nodding, turning back to her boyfriend like a lost puppy and you didn’t even have a chance to possibly ask her to come with you. She can’t even walk, it being really nearly impossible in her state and high heels. You slowly turn your head to the direction of the figure, their stare so hard you don’t even have to wonder if they went somewhere. Only now it seems somewhat closer to you, even if it’s still standing in its original spot. You shake off the weird feeling, head hanging low, while you walk past the people to the staircase to the second floor. Not even an inhale of breath leaves you, eyes staring at the wall, not wanting to look at its face any longer, fearing that it might imprint in your mind.
The whole world swirls around you, grabbing the railing of the staircase in a tight grip. You are thankful that the lights were dimmed, because only the blue hue makes your incoming headache worsen. Making your way up the stairs you slither around the couple that literally blocked the whole middle part of the staircase, ignoring the nasty smacks of their lips and sighs. You meet a lot of pairs like that on the second floor — grinding against each other in the hallway, sneaking in one of the rooms and you really don’t look forward to maybe accidentally catching someone in the act, while searching for a bathroom. The house seems obscurely big, the hallway going into a big circle. Then you suddenly hear the sound of toilet flushing, before a guy stumbles around the corner. You don’t waste your time, picking up your pace and zooming around the corner only to bump into someone.
In your drunken state, your whole body is jelly, legs wobbly and you are thankful that the person you had bumped into puts their hand on your lower back to stabilize you. You huff, blowing your hair out of your face, looking up at your so called savior and you instantly wished you didn’t. Staring at you so blankly and almost deadly is the same ghostly, white mask you saw just moments ago. You don’t want to think much about it for your sake, because you already can feel yourself shaking at the thought that it followed you up here. However that wouldn’t be possible, it was a dead end, no other way up here than the one you came from. It must be someone else — maybe it was a popular costume, that you didn’t know of yet.
The hold the person had on you was soft, though you can feel their covered fingertips digging into your naked back. The two black holes instead of its eyes made you want to curl up into a ball the more you looked at them, making you wiggled yourself out of its hold. The music in the background was too quiet to your liking, not to mention that there was one other you and this person in the hallway. You mumble a small apology, too quiet to even reach your own ears, before literally running to lock yourself in the nearby bathroom, but not with its eyes staring you down the whole time.
You breathe heavily, fumbling with the lock, before pressing your back to the sink. You are scared. You are terrified to even walk out of the bathroom, reminiscing the ghost haunting the hallway. However you spend a lot of time in this small, safely locked bathroom to know that your friend might not wait for you that much longer. It makes you slowly opened the door, hinges creaking and a sigh of relief leaves you, when you look into the hallway. No one was there. Maybe it truly was a ghost and you imagined all of it.
You were thankful that night for your friend not leaving without you, clinging onto her just as tightly as she was, while you made your way home. Though even if you left that house and also the last bits of the alcohol in your system, you couldn’t quite forget it. The way the simply mask sparked something in you, making you shiver in wonder and fright, thinking about what might have been going on inside their heads when they looked at you.
────
The evil and bad feeling left behind by the whole occurrence left a spot however. Just few days after the party, while you were hanging out with your now completely sober friend in the living room changed your whole mood together. Your eyes snapped to the television, stopping the scribbling of your pen as your heart only beated faster by the sudden news coming from the reporters mouth. “A sense of dread has once again found the small town Sunny Dale after a body was found inside a local home last night. The victim body was discovered with multiple stab wounds. The only evidence left behind was the victim’s phone, found beside the body. Authorities are concerned this could be linked to a string of unsolved murders from months ago, leading many to fear the return of the same killer. As the investigation unfolds, police are urging anyone with information to come forward–” Your stomach turned at the news, looking at your equally horrified friend.
A lump formed into your throat, heart jumping in your chest at the newsy “Again?” You wonder out loud, shaking your head in disbelief of what you were hearing.
“Yeah, there’s been some couple of these things showing up in the news for the past year. Everyone just thought that they maybe stopped…” Your friend’s voice was little, also looking at the television, with fearful eyes.
Moving here, you would have never thought that you would be terrified to go out of the house. Your aunt never said a word about these events, maybe to not scare you and if she didn’t tell you about it, it must have been very bad. You understand that she herself is scared to talk about such things happening here in her hometown. Maybe she thought that telling you would only bring a bad omen.
The news spread quickly and into every corner and place. You couldn’t escape it and your own deadly curiosity led you to look through few months old newspapers. The things you read made your stomach turn. Even after reading through them shortly, throwing them away from your reach right after, the whispers and gossip wouldn’t let you live. You were normally paranoid — an overthinker. Of course you were scared, just as anyone, because with you can never now if you will be next. Your aunt wasn’t much better than you, being older and all, alone here in this house till you moved here, didn’t make her feel that much safer. She needed a deep breath of fresh air, but still when she came to you with the news of spending the weekend with her long life friend — you weren’t really happy.
You tried to beg your friend to stay with you, almost embarrassed by how much paranoid and scared you were to be left alone the whole weekend. She’s couldn’t make it — she herself was going away for a small family holiday. Everyone was leaving you and your overthinking only became worst. A tragic thing happened just few houses away from yours, horror filled your every sense and since then you can’t remember the last time you slept soundly. Only more horror could keep you up at night, so you decided to go to the local Blockbuster store. Maybe it wasn’t a very good idea — looking at such movies, when the very same things were happening around you, but you are just so scared of falling asleep alone, like a child scared of the boogeyman under their bed. The only time of the day, when you can rest your eyes will have the be the moment sun rises.
You push the heavy doors to the store open, bell ringing over your head as you make your way inside. Your eyes scan through the aisles, not meeting many people in your way, tugging at the bottom of your short sleeve shirt, lip pouting at the big selection the store had for you. You really haven’t rented a movie before, just going over your friend’s house, who probably had just as a big of a collection in their house, but tou your luck she wasn’t home to lend you something. The new excitement in you is bright, a little lost of words at few of the names you come across off. You can’t really help yourself by going over to the romcom section first and strangely it was right next to the genre of movies you were here for — how funny.
Though your heart aches for a sweet romantic movie that would leave you with butterflies in your stomach, it still wouldn’t be enough for you to not fall asleep. You have to wonder if you aren’t just torturing yourself at this point, but you can’t ignore the fact that maybe someone might get inside your house, when you would happen to fall asleep. You visibly shiver at the thought, looking away from the section of old horror movies. Though you liked the vintage filmography, you think that not even a single one could make you shiver in fear.
Your fingers trail over the row of paranormal horror movies, watching them slowly turn into more slasher. You stop at a particular one, known and already seen by you, but you can’t lie that you weren’t terrified the first time you had watched it. Pulling out the cassette, you stare down at the bold name, completely unaware of your surroundings and the shadow looming over your hunched up figure.
“Looking for something?”
You jump back at the sudden voice, stumbling just a little and bumping into the movies before you. Turning to the owner of the voice, you sigh a little at the familiar face. “Oh, hi Seungmin.” The dark, longer hair on him can’t mask away the obvious glimmer of amusement in his eyes. Your surprise doesn’t flatter, when your gaze falls down to the tag on his blue shirt. “Not really-“ You trail off, shaking your head at your own thoughts.
The whole situation that happened felt you overthinking nonstop — however you don’t really recall hearing anything about him working here. Almost everyone goes here and everyone likes to talk, though you don’t know what they would even talk about, when it comes to Seungmin. He was quiet, always in the corner with the bothered look on his face, never talking to anyone if not needed, other than…the dirty, bleached blonde you come across off just few days ago. Maybe these are just accidents, maybe it’s the universe pushing you to them to finally make more friends — you are definitely overthinking.
Being so lost in your thoughts, you are startled again by Seungmin reaching over your shoulder to tap at the paper, cover on the cassette. “Evil dead, huh?” You can hear the smile in his words, smelling his minty breath from the gum he is chewing. “You like scary movies?”
You frown a little and mainly by his try of making a conversation — you ignore it. “A little.“ You shrug, looking at the cover one last time before deciding to put it back. “Just trying to find something to keep me up at night.” You answer, turning around to look at the other side of the aisles only to be blocked by his taller frame.
You breathe in his cologne, his stare making you fidget as your back falls lightly back on the aisles to make some space between your bodies, but he didn’t even move an inch by the sudden proximity. “Why?” His voice is softer than you expected, eyes widely looking up at him as he tilts his head down at you. “You like being scared?”
Your lips parted at that question, lost for words for some reason. “No, it’s just–“ Your own eyes save you from answering, when you see a flash of red on the small television in the corner of the store. Even here, in a fairly empty Blockbuster store the news can’t seem to leave you alone. You can fear the obvious stare on your sudden change of expression and it makes you feel embarrassed by the very clear face of fear on your features. Glancing back at him quickly, you want to laugh at your whole situation. “I just don’t want to fall asleep that’s all.” You say, stepping away from him to finally rest your eyes on the new selection.
“That’s understandable.” Seungmin nods, eyes turning away from the television back to you, watching your own eyes skim through the movies.
You then thankfully see the next person walking up at you from the other side, giving your pour heart a rest. “Heard that the guy was stabbed 37 times.” Says the person and you do a double take at the familiar voice, your small assumption being only being proven correct, when you see the shaggy, blonde next to you. The horrible words don’t particularly move you, because you are somehow very intrigued by Jeongin’s own work uniform. Have you really not noticed them until now?
You hear Seungmin click his tongue at his friend’s words. “Oh, really, Jeongin?” You don’t see the looks being shared behind you, because when you stop trailing your hand over the multiple choices for your cinema night, you just notice how much the two of them are close to your body. A small silence rings in the air, your eyes falling on Seungmin’s hand right next your head. You can feel his breath on your cheek, when he boldly stretches his arm to touch a one specific film in the shelf. It wouldn’t be considered bold if he wasn’t so close to you, not when his fingers brush your thigh. Your eyes watch his hand and the same fingers, playing with the paper case a little too specifically. You nearly gasp at how he trailed his fingers across the movie’s cover, this whole thing happening just right before your pubic bone. Instinctively you move back a little to give him room, but you only feel your arm graze Jeongin’s chest. “If you don’t want to fall asleep…” Straightening his back, your gaze meets Seungmin’s with bashfulness. “Watch Nightmare on Elm Street–“ He says, waiving the movie at you.
“It’s not that scary for me.” Your throat is dry, voice scratchy and you really want to dive into the pile of horror right now. Trying to ignore the even more unbearable stare from the other, you try to distract yourself by looking through the selection, picking up the very familiar one.
You hear the scoff on your right side right when you grab it, feeling their intense stares momentarily flicker to the movie in your hand. “Really?” Seungmin exclaims, definitely judging your choice and taste.
Shrugging your shoulders, you tap your fingers on the paper, going over the outline of the small, red words — You’ll wish it was only make-belief. “Yeah — I mean dolls are sometimes scary.” You say, truthfully and you hear the blonde next to shuffle a little.
“It’s funny.” You look up at him, confused by such word and you now truly realize how close he is to you. You want to back away, but you are cornered — no one can safe you from their claws.
“What?”
Tilting his head, you can see his sharp eyes shimmer under the light, that reflects lightly in his glasses. “The movie?” He said it so obviously, like your question was so stupid to be even spoken.
Your eyebrow’s furrowed, looking up at him. “Well, if you find slashers funny…” You trail off, not really sure what to say back.
The look you received is so sharp that it makes you shiver, feeling Seungmin staring the same way at the back of your head. The air around you three is suffocating, but you seem the be the one most effective by it. The way they stand so close to you, surrounding your body not just with their own by also with their whole beings is nerve racking — and somehow not in a bad way. They both seem to be really comfortable in getting into your personal bubble, their hands already tearing it away from your own hands. This whole interaction is unusual for you and it is only weirder, because you know about their dislike towards people at your school. So, why are they so interested in picking up a small and quite pointless conversation — why are their so interested in you?
You are lost in thought, though still highly aware of the two bodies on either side of you. You found it hard to breathe, throat closing, so aware of everything around you — their breathing, the smell of their cologne, the rustle of their clothes when they tried to move even closer to you and even the soft sounds of footsteps coming behind you. “Y/N!” You are pulled out of your thoughts by the sound of your name and somehow that made the pair move too, twisting their bodies to see, who saved you from their hold.
“Jake!” You gasp out. You didn’t plan to sound so excited by his appearance, but it felt like you could finally breathe calmly.
You can see his attention shift a little, looking over your shoulders at the pair and you can basically see the small uncomfortableness in him from their behavior. Taking a one step closer to the brunette in reflex, your feet stumble over one another. It felt wrong to do that. “Hi!” Jake greets you, already feeling the awkwardness of this situation. Normal people would’ve left right? Or maybe just give you two some privacy, but Jeongin and Seungmin don’t move an another inch, silently staring at the both of you.
“Hi…” Your lips lift up into a small, that falls quicker than anticipated, your nails slightly digging into the paper case in your hand. There’s small beat of silence between you two, hoping that he might talk first as he was the one that approached you, but he seemed very interested in the two men behind you. Coughing little into your hand, seems to get his attention back, but he still looked a little…uninterested. “You weren’t at the party?” You ask, nearly cringing at the reality of being stared down, when talking to him.
Jake is little taken back, blinking at you. “Hm, yeah — no, I was.” He says and you frown at his words.
“Oh! Okay…”
“Yeah…” He scratches his neck, jumping in his spot a little, before a sudden, wide smile breaks off on his face. You watch his hand, way before he puts it on your shoulder, tugging you into him rather than coming to get you, like he was intimidated to approach you . You do let him put his arm around your shoulder, taking you to walk a few steps forward, away from your past companion. His touch feels a little heavy, but the small brush of your arm, when you pass Seungmin, makes you look at him, catching his eye, before you are being turned back to the guy next to you, who you realize was talking your ear off the whole time. “Y/N…I was wondering, if you want to come over to my place tomorrow.”
You froze in your spot, just few steps in your small walk. “I don’t know…” You heard the hidden meaning in his words, but you are not so sure if you want to go to an unknown guy’s house at the moment.
“It will be fun.” He says, almost whining, looking like a small child not being given his favorite toy. His arm falls off your shoulders thankfully at that, only to tap at the movie in your hands. “We can watch–“ He tilts his head sideways to read the title and his lack of movie knowledge makes you stunned. “Child’s play.”
Shaking your hand, you pull the movie from his fingers to your chest. ”No, Jake. I kind of already have something.” You say, wanting to end this conversation short, because you can feel the heat of two pairs of eyes on your head.
The look on your face definitely is clear enough for him to realize that you are not changing your mind — or was it the judging eyes of the two friends behind you? “Alright then…see you around.” He says, smiling lightly, making his eyes wrinkle and you want to almost stop him from going away from you for a split second.
However you only watch his disappearing figure, trailing your eyes over his body and you know that under different circumstances you might have maybe come to his house, but right know you do not want to leave your house and go somewhere you haven’t been before — you don’t even feel completely safe in your own home to begin with. You sigh at yourself, gaze still staring blankly before you, till you practically feel the seeping pressure of eyes on you again. You don’t even turn around, not even trying to walk away to maybe just disappear and find a different store to satisfy you, because it felt like you wouldn’t be able to get away from them anyway.
“Your boyfriend?” You recognized Jeongin’s voice and you are a little taken back by the rough edge it had to it.
You turn to the side just a little, looking at him, before glancing at Seungmin behind him. “What?” You are not sure if it was meant for his question again or for the sight of the dark haired, brunette leaning casually on his body. You are met with silence at that, realizing how your eyes were going between the two of them, till they meet Jeongin’s again. So dark — he doesn’t even blink, while looking at you, also noticing his lips that formed into thin line. “We are just talking–“
“Yeah, like back at the lockers?”
Frowning at the harsh tone, the glare send your way is blocked by his friend, who steps before him. Standing before you with his back straight, you only know can feel the true effect he has — confident, yet unbothered, but definitely thriving in your face, when he gently puts his hand on the movie in your hands. It is still laying on your chest and your lips fall apart as he wraps his hand around it, fingers grazing the skin of your chest. You let him grab it, watching him put it behind his back, before he pulls out a different case that instantly hands to you. “Pick this one.” Seungmin says, grinning a little as you look a the second part of the Chucky series. “It’s more gory.”
You don’t want to look ungrateful, so you grab it, smiling a little at him, though you are not sure really what to say to that. “Thanks, I like the first one the best though…” You awkwardly mention him to give it to you, thinking that maybe he would just hand it to you, but you basically have to lean over him to grab it from behind his back. You know that he does it on purpose, playing with you, but it still feels so new from him to do that. You think you have never heard him talk this much before, not to mention his friend behind him. When you go grab your desired movie from his hands, you learned that they are empty, awkwardly wrapping your hand around his. Sucking in a breath at the quite intimate touch, you feel Jeongin poking you with the case you were searching for, showing you that he was the one holding it the whole time. A short, dry laugh leaves you at your and theirs doings, not missing how the blonde basically shoves the case in your hands, separating you from his friend. “Thanks…I think this will keep me busy this weekend.“ You say pulling the two first Chucky movies to your chest, taking a step back from them.
They both look you over, completely without any shame dragging their eyes over your body and it makes you tug a little at the edge of shirt that has ridden up. You watch Seungmin tilt his head slowly, turning back to his friend who hands him a new cassette from behind his back. You actually wanted nothing more than to escape this unbearable tension, but you become curious about the movie being handed to you. “We have this new movie.” He hands it to you, making you glance at the cover. “Check this out-“
“Just got released-“ Says Jeongin, taking a few steps closer to you, joining his friend’s side, while they take in your reaction.
With your eyebrows furrowed you look at the name — Fear: Together forever. Or else. Flipping it over you read quickly through the summary, before looking back at the front, eyes scanning the face of the man on the cover and you nod in realization. “Oh, yeah. I heard about it.” Glancing at the two of them, you try to keep your cool at their unblinking stares. “Some kind of psycho boyfriend–“ You say your own version of the movie’s plot, playing with the cassette in your hand to distract yourself a little.
“Oh – so the spoilers got to you-“ Jeongin doesn’t seem particularly sad about that, but you can see the small pout on his face.
Shrugging, you look down at the movie. “Well, it’s kind of obvious you know…” You put the movie together with the other two in your hands, not really against of seeing something new and you also don’t, for some reason, want to let them and their small help down. You didn’t plan to finish your sentence, as it was to you kind of obvious, but when you look up at their faces, they only stare at you more longingly, waiting. “I mean — look at him.” You flip the cassette to let them take a look at the man on the cover. “You can see the crazy in his eyes.” You say, before nodding at them. “I’ll take it.”
You want to almost ask them what’s up with them, see if they maybe had a problem with you by their nonstop glares — but you are not sure if you are reading the emotion on their faces right. They don’t say anything, only turning around to lead you back to the counter. Seungmin takes the lead, making you walk up next to him, while Jeongin keeps himself behind you. They don’t seem to be quite fond of being away from you for some unknown reason and you don’t want to say that relief washed over you, when you hand the dark brunette the three movies you picked.
As he scanned them, each peep reminded you that you will be free of their presence, till you will have to return them. “How much?” You ask, realizing you didn’t even look at the rent money even once, digging through your bag, hand grabbing the scrunched up money.
“It’s on the house.”
Your eyebrows shoot up to your hairline, looking up at Seungmin, who stands behind the counter. “Oh! Oh, no that’s okay, it’s just like ten dollars-“ You say, waving awkwardly at him to know you are completely fine paying for yourself, but the man before you only shoves the movies to you. Staring at him for a second, blinking, your heart skips a beat at the sudden change of emotion on his face. It makes you nervously mumble a small thank you, somehow knowing that there was no use to argue with him.
Hands falling on to the pile of movies, your fingers graze his, staring with wide eyes as he swipes his ring finger over the back of your hand. His touch feels hot, leaving a tingling sensation in your lower tummy and you sigh out shakily at such bold move. You basically rush to pull the cassettes to you, but you can’t take your eyes off his, even when you back up. However you are unaware of your surroundings once again, because you only bump into the blonde who’s been standing behind you the whole time. Your back meets his chest for second too long, shock striking you at how quietly he was able to be unspotted by you. Mumbling a small apology, which you don’t even hear yourself, you turn on your heels, legs quick to run of the store, so you can escape their eyes and their hold. And you finally took a deep breath you so needed, ignoring the obvious and familiar feeling in your chest and lower tummy.
────
Sweat drips down your temple, short puff of air leaving as you close your eyes at the feeling of the night’s cold breeze fanning over your face. You take in the smell of wet grass, mixed with the humid air. You can feel your tank top sticking to your flushed, hot skin, your shorts gathered between your thighs as you lean out of your bedroom window. The night was quiet, no sound other the few rustles of trees and crickets — it reminded you of how alone you now were. The shower which you took just minutes was cold, but it did nothing against the awfully hot, spring night, though the few whiffs of colder breeze reaching you felt blissful.
You expected for it to be worst, but somehow the worst thing of being alone right now was that you couldn’t distract yourself from the awful heat. Your room’s window was unopened for the whole day and it was basically unable to breathe in it, so you decided to rather sleep downstairs in the living room. You take a one last breath, before pushing your window shut, taking your light, fluffy blanket with you before walking out of your bedroom.
The sound of voices coming from downstairs made it a little easier for you to ignore your thoughts that you tried so hard to keep locked. With a breathless sigh you walk up to the couch, plopping yourself on it and whining almost as the cushions sticks to your skin. You were somewhere else right now, lost in thought, gazing up at the ceiling, imagining a night sky over you — imagining being somewhere else. The commercial playing on the television ends, hearing the happy background music cutting short.
Your head tilts forward, eyes falling on the movie recommended to you on the top of the pile on the coffee table. The eyes of the actor stare at you from behind the woman’s blonde hair and you can’t help, but get lost in them. Your mind goes back to the pair helping you, looking quite excited — well, you only had a feeling, because they didn’t truly show any emotions on their face. Your own curiosity makes you pick up the case, pulling out the cassette. You for a second just flip it in your hand, expecting it, before you shuffle down the sofa, not even bothering to get and walk to the television.
The voice of the reporter is quiet, getting louder as you crawl up to it and the change of volume makes your ears pick up the words leaving her mouth. “Authorities are still investigating the recent resurgence of a killer, who terrorized the small town Sunny Dale a few months ago. While there has been no trace of evidence leading to the identity of the person responsible, the latest update to this cases is deeply disturbing.” You freeze in your spot, eyes unblinkingly looking at the humming television before you. “Authorities now confirmed that investigators have found a new, unused Ghostface mask near a victim’s house. The mask, which is widely available in stores selling horror-themed merchandise, was likely placed there intentionally by the perpetrators. Police are urging the public to stay vigilant — if you see anyone acting suspicious and wearing this mask contact—“ A choked sound leaves you, watching the screen cut to a picture of said mask — the one which you have seen, the one you saw a week ago.
You shakily turn off the television, not wanting to hear another word. The quiet that follows after is deadly — pinching you, making goosebumps appear all over your body. You have seen it — you were so close to it…you touched it. Nausea rises in your gut, looking back at the house phone next to the couch, contemplating. Should you call the police or not? Maybe it was really just a coincidence that you happen to see someone wearing that mask. Maybe the police are already getting calls from others — were they really that desperate that they needed help to catch this person? You know that even if you called, it wouldn’t be any use. Literally everyone was there at the party and not just people from your school — it can be anyone.
Then your doorbell rings, a small yelp leaving from you, making your hand fly to your mouth to silence it. You need to calm down…the thought of the killer being at the party was really unlikely, because they were people present — nothing happened at the party, nothing. It was just…someone. In your state of shock which you slowly, but surely get out of, makes you jump back to present, eyes turning to the main door. You completely forgot that you ordered a dinner.
However you are still cautious, standing up and making your way to the front. The cold floor helps you wake up a little, feet paddling across the hallway, before leaning on to the door to look through the peephole. No one…even if that made you feel better, you are highly aware of how weird it is that the delivery man you anticipated isn’t there. You glance down at the keys in the door, still locked and safe from the outside world. It’s such a stupid thing to do and you really think about it, but soon enough you are unlocking the door and pushing it open just a little to see what’s waiting for you on the other side.
No one is standing there, nothing, but the pitch black night, till your eyes drift slowly to the doorstep where surely your food was. Confused, you slowly become more curious than afraid, opening the door a little more to kneel down and inspecting the box of pizza. It is almost funny how such thing could make you fear for your life. Because of the small light coming from the inside, you catch the small note on top of the box just before it could fly away. ‘Sorry for leaving your food on the ground, had to go!’ A deep frown falls over your face, because in what world would a delivery man give you your food, without even letting you pay for. Must have been in a real rush to let you have your food for free…
You don’t want to put much thought to it. It was just few dollars and maybe there was a party somewhere going on, where they would definitely get their money’s worth back. Taking the box with you, you are not that angry of not paying as your hand touches the bottom of the cold box — you are too unbothered to go and heated up right now. Shutting the main door, you lock it, before finally going to the living room to watch the movie waiting for you. Putting the box down on the table, you put one slice of the cold pizza in your mouth, fumbling with the cassette and television for a second, before you flop back onto the couch.
The movie — well, it does in sort of way have you on the edge just few minutes into it. It is interesting and almost realistic in some way, making you get real deep into it. You lay in the corner of the couch, biting down on your fingers, watching the main characters interact with each other in a dark lit club. The lead, the main antagonist has a specific maneuvers that you find quite interesting — charming, yet in his eyes you can see something hidden in them…something dark. As you are so into the movie, eyes staring dead straight on the television, the ringing of the house phone right next to your ear certainly startles you to death.
A soft gasp flies past your lips, putting your hand over your racing heart and turning to the ringing phone next to you. You grab it without any hesitation, thinking that maybe your aunt is trying to check up on you or maybe it was your friend ready to talk your ear off — definitely not silence. “Hello?” You ask, gripping the phone in your hand and pressing it right against your ear tightly.
“Hello?” Says a voice on the other side of the line.
You shake your head a little, not recognizing the voice. “Yes?” You say, eyes still on the movie.
“Who’s this?”
You press your lips together, straightening your back a little. The voice is scratchy, yet deep, an unusual small hum every time it speaks. “Y/N.” You say, not really wanting to say your name, but what harm can it do? Maybe the person just delayed a wrong number.
There’s a small shuffling on the other line, before a small click follows. “Oh, Y/N–“ The person says your name sweetly, making goosebumps rise on your skin. It was whiny, so familiar, like the person knew you.
“Jake, is that you?” You ask, sitting up a little. His voice today sounded a little different than you remembered, but maybe it was just the phone distorting it. “How do you know my number?”
“Oh — got a friend, who asked your friend…” A small pause follows and you don’t know why but the way he speaks to you in this voice strikes something in you or maybe it was just the scene playing in the movie. “Want talk to you–“
“Okay…what do you want to talk about?” You ask, eyes still on the television, yet your attention is now completely on him. Did your friend really give him your number? But it is a little unusual that she would be able to keep it secret — maybe she just wanted you to have fun on your weekend.
“What’s your favorite scary movie?”
You smile a little at the question. “Oh, but you already know that one — Child’s play.”
A long sigh leaves his lips and it is almost like you can feel it on your ear. “Sorry — I seem to forgot.” This whole unexpected moment makes you tingle a little in excitement, distracting you from everything around you and you can’t help but feel effected by the change of voice.
“That’s okay.” You say. “What’s yours?”
“Guess.”
Humming lightly, you truly think about your answer. Jake’s face flashes in your mind, but it somehow is so blurry that you can’t think of a movie that would fit him — so, you focused on the voice in your ear instead. “I don’t know…I fear you have to give me a hint–“
“You are smart girl, Y/N, surely you can think of killer in a white mask–“
The words strike you a little too deeply, because your mind firstly shows you the ghostly mask. The two black holes it had for its eyes, before you quickly shut down your thoughts. “Halloween?” You say, uncertain as an another slasher with a similar mask flashes before your eyes, but this one spoke to you mostly.
You hear a click of a tongue on the other line at your answer. “Clever girl.” The nickname makes you unusually warm, your legs moving against each other, shifting the thin blanket down your thighs. “What are you doing right now?”
“Ehm — nothing much, just watching a movie.” You just now glance back to the said movie, already a little confused what the characters were doing and why— you are getting a little distracted.
“Alone?” The raspy voice sends chills down your spine. “Want me to come over? I don’t want you to be scared–“
“I’m not scared…right now.” You say, frowning a little, trying to defend yourself and thankfully your voice is steady.
You hear a sound then, close to a coo, before there is more shuffling. “Is it because of me?” There is obvious teasing tone in his voice, but you can’t help yourself, but feel amused by his tactics.
“Yeah, your voice is…soothing in a way.” You can’t quite find the right word to describe it, but you definitely can think of a word which is even closer than the one you said.
Small silence fills the line, listening closely to the static, ear trying to pick up any noise you could. This small pause only highlights the tension rising in the room, making you fumble with the left strap of your tank top and just as you did that — like he could see you, he speaks up again, but now there is not so much amusement. “Y/N, tell me…” You can’t even make a sound, so he continues, a little nervous about what he might say — but you certainly wouldn’t have guessed it right. “What are you wearing?” He asks, breathing into the speaker, the sigh making your pure heart skip a beat.
Your eyes widened, mouth hanging open. “What? I-I–“ This definitely wasn’t part of your plan for the night, neither getting a quite firstly innocent call to only lead to this. Your body responses truthfully the moment those words are spoken, thighs rubbing against each other, feeling the hem of your shorts digging into your center. You battle a little, wondering if you should play along and maybe enjoy this call or if you should just hang up. You definitely wouldn’t care if you did, you wouldn’t care that you basically would chicken out of phone sex, but — the way your bottom half starts to tingle, you tell yourself to relax and simply enjoy. “Not much?” You cough out as your voice becomes strained.
A low, long hum echoes from the other side, spreading tingles across your slicked skin. “Not much…” He repeats and you hear the fake pout in his voice. “Describe what you are wearing.”
You know where this conversation is leading to, but you are still careful with your words, a little self conscious, like he could just see your barely covered body. “Just a tank top and shorts…there are hearts on them.” Biting your lip at the last sentence, you wait for his reaction and maybe next request.
“How cute.” He almost whispers and you can basically feel his every breath in your ear. “Wish I could see you–“ You think you hear a small mumble at the end, but you don’t pick up what it is — probably just something in the background.
You close your eyes for a second, the movie still playing long forgotten as you slowly pull down your blanket to pool at your feet. Air hits your hot skin, damp in sweat and something else. You pick your courage, licking your dried lips, before speaking. “And what would you do if you did?” Your voice is no longer collected and cool, it’s breathy and whiny and you feel heat rushing to your face at your own voice.
You seem to catch him off guard — or so you thought, only to be reminded that you might not be that seductive as you thought you. “Do you really want to know, Y/N?” There’s an edge to his voice, giving you the last chance to back away, but you know that it is too late for that, because you can already feel slick forming between legs.
“Yes.”
Shakily responding you let the phone fall down shoulder, pressing your ear to it, while your fingers tug at the cushion beneath you. Waiting, though not so patiently, your eyes drift around the room, like it is the first time ever, your mind empty and fuzzy. Another click is heard in your ear, before a sigh is heard, making your hands tighten around the leather couch. “Pull your hair off your neck…” Your eyes close ever so slightly at those words, ear becoming numb from how much you try to feel his small breaths across your skin. “Then kiss down your neck, teasing you, just a little, till I would get a little lower–“ Your breath hitches, rubbing your legs together, unshamefully aroused and you really don’t seem to care anymore. “Do something for me Y/N.” You nod your head, like he could see you, eyes blinking open. “Follow my voice.”
Your white knuckles, that grip the cushion turn into their natural color, as you slowly trail your hand over your body to your hair. You do just as he said, gathering the strands of your hair and pushing them off your shoulders, fingers dancing across your neck. “Okay…a little lower–“ You are quiet, bashful from the fact that only a voice and words could make you feel like this. The more your hand travels lower, the more your nails scratch at your skin — going over your neck, collarbones, till they pinch on the swell of your breasts.
“Yes–“ You gasp at the moan leaving him, whimpering softly to yourself, while you play with the hem of your tank top. “Lower.” You follow his word, fingers getting caught a little in the cleavage of your top, dragging the fabric down with your movements, till it snaps back. “Lower.” His voice suddenly becomes rougher, hearing the shuffling of fabric on the other side as your hand meets your stomach. “Right there Y/N — yeah, there we go–“ You sigh sharply, head tilting back a little as your hand meets the waistband of your sleep short, stopping just over your mound. “Tell me…how do you feel.”
“I — hot, I feel hot.” You say, sighing breathlessly. You do not move your hand and touch yourself, the build up making you feel so much better than you thought it would and you do not want to disobey him. “I–I can’t-“
“Can’t what, sweetheart?”
“Wait – please, I need it.” You don’t recognize yourself — so needy and ready to burst at any moment. You can feel your nipples hardening, goosebumps appearing on your sweaty skin, thighs already slick with your cum.
“Touch yourself.” You can hear the words, but you for second can’t hear hear anything else other than the low hum in your ears. Your hand trails lower, pushing the material of your shorts to the side before you dip just a little into your leaking cunt, moan ripping out of you. “Just like that, Y/N. Keep going–“
You frown in pleasure, two of your fingers swiping across your folds, spreading your legs to fully touch your already puffy clit. “Oh, my god…” You have never been so swollen like this before, the hood of your clit puffed up, hips jumping, when you finally push down on it. You circle your fingers across it, smearing your juices across your whole bottom fall and the nasty wet, smack can definitely be heard through the speaker, when a groan fills your ear.
“You sound so good–“ Something rattles on the other side and you through out the noise hum in delight from such praise. “Come one, baby, put those little fingers inside your pussy — you sound like you need it–“ Curse falls your lips, whining a little when your hand leaves your clit, but as you put your hand lower, fingers just dipping inside of you, your palm grazes you, making you grind down greedily. “Fuck that pretty pussy – want to hear it.” Your mind is all over the place, too lost in the pressure, because you only hear a click of a tongue again, when your fingers slide hallway inside you. “I want to hear it.” He voices out each word, making your eyes screw shut at such filthy demand.
However your other hand is already moving to the phone, before you can even stop yourself, losing power over your own body. Grabbing it in your shaking hand, you want so desperately to lift your hips so your fingers would go deeper, but you wait till the phone is placed right on your upper thigh. The fact of hearing you so closely — how each inch of your fingers disappear into you, makes a wet sound and it should be embarrassing, but it only makes you moan louder, hoping that he can hear you.
When your hole meets the back of your knuckles, you scissor your fingers, spreading yourself open. Your slick is already pooling down your ass, creating a wet spot on your blanket, with the first curl of your fingers. You chase after the pleasure, clit bumping into your palm as you pull out your fingers a little to only push them back in, hitting the small squishy spot inside you. Gripping the phone tightly, it shakes from your strong hold, mouth falling open. You are dripping wet — so slippery that you fuck yourself just a little harder to feel more of the sickening pleasure. You are letting yourself go, moaning loudly, head tilting back, feeling your tummy rumble and when a small crack of the floor is heard you realize that you almost forgotten the phone in your hand.
Your hand doesn’t stop, when you put the phone back to your ear, whimpering at the quiet moan from the other side. “Fuck — you sound even better than I imagined…” Your whimper mixes with his own sound of pleasure, wondering if he might be doing the exact same thing as you, but hearing him becoming so whiny and quiet is really making you lose it. “Keep going–“
“Please talk more…I’m close.” Gasping sharply, when the tips of your fingers graze the one sweet spot, your hips hump your hand wildly. Your eyes are shinning with small tears of pleasure, ready to plead if he asked you to.
“Yeah?” You can hear the amusement in his voice. “Gonna come all over yourself? Just from hearing my voice? Fuck, you are such a slut Y/N–” Nodding dumbly, the name only makes your eyes squeeze tightly shut, concentrating on the pleasure, ignoring your numbing hand. You place the phone to your shoulder again to only sneak your now free hand to your breast. The extra stimulation almost too much, pinching a little at your hardened nipple. “Yeah, keep squeezing your tits just like that–“
You pause, slowly realizing the words he had spoken. Your hand releases your breast, now laying flat across it, the other still moving a little. “H-how do you know?” You ask, voice quiet, but you know it’s not that much from the pleasure anymore.
“I can see you, silly girl.” The deep chuckles makes your heart stop, freezing in your spot, eyes staring wildly across the seemingly empty living room.
“Where?” Your breathing becomes heavy, pulling your fingers away from your center and sitting up slowly on the couch.
“Come and see — should have locked your window–“ Your eyes widened at the words, hearing the sound of beeping, signaling the call has been ended. You wanted to scream, cry, but in your state of shock and in this fight or flight situation, you don’t think twice and rush to pull yourself on your feet, throwing the phone somewhere, not really caring about the crack you hear, when it hits the floor. You are shaking, chest tight as you run on your trembling feet to the front door only to be met with a sight that almost makes you fall in despair.
Ghostface — it is standing right in front of you, right before the door leading to your freedom. It stares at you, listening how your naked feet squeak on the polished floor, making you stumble from your sudden pause. The way you fall a little forward makes him jump at you, but you quickly dodge his hands, turning around to run to the opposite side and away from him. However as you ran through the hallway, passing the staircase, you notice someone standing in the middle of the stairs.
A cry leaves you, thinking firstly you have lost your mind, when your eyes meet another person dressed as the ghostly figure. Your first thought of going up the stairs to maybe jump of your window, which you knew was definitely now opened was forgotten. This one seems to be even faster as he runs down the stairs, hand shooting through the wooden railing to grab your passing form, but he was only able to graze your shoulder with its leather glove. You can’t catch your breath properly, feet sliding across the floor when you turn the corner to the kitchen. The thought of maybe grabbing a weapon was there, but seeing the other door to the kitchen seemed as a safer option.
Your body slams onto the door, sliding through the small gap, before slamming it in their faces. Your eyes stare around the living room and the couch which you were pleasuring yourself on to its voice just minutes ago — you don’t want to reminisce it. Your feet drag you back to the main door, turning the knob, only to stupidly realize you have locked it. However, when your eyes fall down the keyhole, your keys were not there. The window is your only option now…
You can taste blood on your tongue, adrenaline pulsing through you, when you turn around to the staircase, catching a glimpse of the two figures closing the distance between you. The carpet scratches you, burning, like your already strained muscles as you jump onto the stairs, nearly falling to your knees by the reckless move. That also almost gets you caught — dragging yourself up your feet before one of them can catch your ankle. The loud, creaking stairs, makes you wonder if you truly are being haunted, because how long have they been here with you? The stairs never seem to end, their incoming stumps making you cry out, rush pulsing in your veins. Your foot just barely touches the carpet of the second floor, before you feel a cold hand on your other. You can’t even blink — it already drag you to its body.
Your hands save you from the fall, a loud thud! echoing in the hallway. You can’t anymore — you can’t…You feel the hand leave you — you hear the slow footsteps coming up the stairs, the two figure’s watching you desperately try and crawl away from them, but you are only flipped onto your back. Hands find your shoulders, pushing you to you to the ground and you gasp loudly at the close proximity of the masked person. You can almost see an emotion behind the darkness…
You don’t fight back anymore, excepting your fate that you still have to guess, because you can’t find any weapon in their hands. The one holding you releases you suddenly, standing up to its fully height. You whimper softly, staring through you eyelashes at the pair looming over your shaking body. The more you look at them, the more you feel nauseous, afraid, tears quickly gathering in your eyes — but at that reaction they pull their hands up to their faces, making you momentarily quiet and still. With shock you watch them wrap their hands around the back of their masks, before pulling them off their heads.
Your whole word turns dark, heart stopping at the familiar heads of hair, thinking you must be out of your mind, but then they reveal themselves fully — Jeongin and Seungmin, staring down at you with crazed smiles, breathing heavily from your small fight. “Oh, my god–“ You hiccup a little, shaking your head in disbelief. Your body shakes, looking at them. Their hair is a mess, noticing the blonde without his glasses and wonder if he ever needed them to begin with. Seungmin takes just a one step closer, making your eyes snap to him, backing up a little. From the corner of your eyes you can see your open bedroom door, but you are not dumb enough to try your luck and also, even with just a small glance, the brunette noticed it. “You killed all of those people–“ You are horrified, disgusted, but you couldn’t take your eyes off them.
They cooed — they cooed at you like they were seeing a small injured puppy, the familiar sound unwillingly making heat go over you. Your lips fall shut, watching how they shake their heads at you. “Those weren’t people, Y/N — we did for you.” Their voices blend into each other, the last sentence making shivers go down your spine. The way they are not phased, looking normal about this whole situation, makes your head hurt.
“W-what?” You can’t cry, only sniffle in confusion. Your eyes trail over their figures clad in long drape of black cloth, nothing, but their masks in their hands. You can’t believe it — you would have ever guessed it. Though maybe your body responding to their stares and need to press their bodies to yours just few hours ago told you enough. They had no weapons, remembering how they only tried to catch and not physically harm you, but how can you be sure of their intentions? Maybe they are hiding their knifes under their cloaks, maybe trying to scare you and play with your mind, before they do it. How can you trust their words right now, when they lied to you the whole time?
Because of the way they appear so calm, it makes your chest stop heaving so hard and fast, catching your breaths that you didn’t take when you were being chased. You watch them both lower themselves to crouch before your layed out form and in reflex your legs you try to kick them down, but you are not fast enough. Both of them wrap their hands around your legs, pressing them down as you trash. Their holds are strong, yet you don’t feel big pressure, only the small scratch of their leather gloves.
The act makes you stop, deciding to regain the small strength left in you, if they decide differently about your fate, but looking back at their faces — now without both of their masks, raw and real, they show you a small spark of warmness in their cold eyes. “Jake–“ Jeongin says his name with displeasure, sneer match Seungmin’s and you listen their confession with choked breath. “The man that was this close to kidnapping you back in winter–“ You shake your head, trying to remember and they see the fight against your own memories from the look on your features. “You weren’t paying attention — like always. Scratching off at your shopping list, completely unaware of the near danger.”
You don’t want to believe their words, but they sound so real. You vividly remember the day, feeling like any other — were they really there? Watching, spying on you, keeping you safe. You realize at that the obvious truth that they have been watching and following you all along. Your mind goes back to the day at the lockers — how you bumped into Jeongin, thinking it was just an accident. It makes you go back today, how his lips formed into a snear, when Jake showed up. ‘Like back at the lockers?’, he said with disgust, eyes trained on the leaving figure of the football player.
“But — I only know you for half a year!” You fire back, almost spitting in their faces and you for some reason don’t talk against the thought of them saving you — they really looked and sounded believable and what use would it be to lie to you now? “What about the other people?” You whisper, trying to push away from their hold, but they only pull you back to them.
“Just a small practice…” Says Seungmin, sniffing a laugh with his friend and you look at them completely horrified. “Though they surely will not be missed, I give you that–“
“Do you really think that we did those things only out of pleasure?” The blonde continues, not letting you have your word. “Those things you called people were nothing more than a waste.” Venom drips from his mouth, eyes glaring into yours.
You don’t know what to say. Again they could be just lying to your face, but why would they? They already showed you how much trust they had in you by pulling of their masks. The news didn’t say anything about the victims, it was always the same — the victim was a residence of the town. Not telling the public what the victim might have done to deserve such punishment, maybe to seek fear in order for the public to began their own search. If the people knew that the killers — Jeongin and Seungmin were targeting only bad people, it would only turn on the authorities. You know that some fanatics would say that they are saviors and in a sense they are. They both saved you from that man which you didn’t even know off, they were taking care of you. No…you can’t be thankful for them, they still hurt people.
“You think that makes you better?” Even the words felt heavy on your tongue, trying to fight back the obvious — they saved you. “You think you will redeem yourself of what you both did?”
The brunette shakes his head instantly, smiling with the other, just as he wraps his hand around your chin. “No…you will redeem us.” His breath fans over your face, lips tingling at the familiar smell of mint. The tone of his voice makes a small sound escape your mouth, screwing your eyes shut in embarrassment.
You hear Jeongin leaning closer to you, the soft fabric of his cloak falling over you. You don’t open your eyes immediately, stilling when his breath hits your ear. “Sweet, Y/N.” He says, voice dripping with honey and you gasp softly, not able to move your mouth properly by the hand on your face.
“Do you think we are going to hurt you?” You have a feeling that the sadness in Seungmin’s voice is mocking, however when your eyes blink open you see the truth. You know — but still your mind overpoweres your heart, logically nodding in agreement at such question and surprisingly they don’t look too taken back or offended.
They actually cooed at you more, shushing you softly and it calms you just a little “We would never.” Still you shake a little in their hold, trying to find the pieces of your shattered sanity. “We did this all for you, so you can be safe-“ Jeongin argues, feeling his covered thumb brushing across your naked skin. You really are crazy to trust them with their words.
Seungmin pulls you closer to face him again, gazing down at you. “Don’t you feel saver knowing we saved you and your dignity?” He says and you gasp in sudden realization.
“You killed Jake-“
“No, no, no-“ Seaungmin stops the small cry leaving you and you feel Jeongin leaning to dig his nose in your hair, basically rubbing the side of his face into you — you can’t do anything other than inhale sharply at his closeness. “Even if we would prefer that…we just really let him learn his lesson.” Smile creeps up onto the brunette’s face and you can feel the other smiling just as wildly on your temple.
“You are both crazy!” Your voice is broken, trembling at the feeling of the blonde’s lips pressing lightly on the side of your face.
“Oh, really?” Every word bounces of your skin, feeling his spit smear over you and at his tone of voice, your bottom lip quivers. “Hear that, Seungmin?” You can hear the amusement in his voice, while he turns his head to glance at his companion and you do nothing, but the same.
A low hum comes from him, looking down your body shamelessly and you self-consciously squeeze your thighs together and that move particularly seems to make his eyes sparkle. “Weren’t you the one fucking yourself to our voices?” Teasing you, the smile in his voice makes you shake, embarrassed at the memory of them seeing you at your most vulnerable.
“I didn’t know it was you!”
“Yeah, but you definitely didn’t think of the fuckface-Jake either.” Spits Jeongin, turning his head to look into your eyes and you can see every small wrinkle and invisible blemish on his skin.
Then a voice is heard and it makes your heart stop for a moment, a familiar knot forming in your stomach as you turn to Seungmin. With wide eyes you glance at the small box in his hand, watching him press down the button on the side of it. “You like it.” He states the obvious and you can’t do nothing, but agree silently in your head. You can hear both his normal voice and his changed one, the reality of the situation crushing over you. His hand on your chin tugs you closer to his face, hearing the click of the button again, crisp hum coming of the voice changer. “You, like that, Y/N?” Fuck you do….
“I-I-“ You try to justify yourself, fight against the rising desire in your gut. Maybe it is because of your ruined orgasm, but you seem to almost lean into his hold.
A deep laugh rings in your left ear, making you look from the corner of your eye at Jeongin who holds his own voice changer in his hand. “Want us to finish the job, huh?“ He says, eyes flickering down your body, hand tightening around you. “I can see the wet spot on your little shorts from here.” Your lips fall apart, whimper leaning you, knowing that Seungmin must feel the blood rushing to your face. You see your legs tremble from how much you were pressing them together, making you calm down your strained muscles. You can feel your upper thighs stick together, the cold air kissing you, realizing you haven’t even put your shorts back to their place.
The hand on your face leaves you, letting you turn to look up at the brunette, watching his every move. A sense of Deja vu washes over you, when he pulls your hair off your shoulder, eyes staring at the naked skin of your neck. Their hands on your legs trail up, the extra stimulation already too much to handle all at once as Seungmin lowers his head to your neck, hand stopping just at your higher part of your thigh — but Jeongin doesn’t.
Breath fans over your skin, making it tingle, before you feel a press of Seungmin’s lips on the part where your neck meets your ear. Mind completely fuzzy, you sigh out a silent gasp, when Jeongin’s fingers lightly graze over your exposed center. It makes your hand shoot to his, gripping at his wrist and it makes him stop momentarily. He meets your wide gaze, quietly asking. You can feel the other kissing your skin again, your hand on the blonde’s softening its grip a little, but not internally letting go. Giving you one single look, his leather covered fingers finally dip into you.
The unknown material on your most sensitive area sends sparks down your spine, gasping lightly, grip around his wrist tightening a little, when he pushes his fingers harder against you. “Fuck, I can feel how wet you are even over my glove–“ The blonde opens his mouth, mimicking the whimper you let out at lewd words. Your other hand flies to grip Seungmin’s shoulder to brace yourself when you feel the small flicker of his friend’s finger on your clit, but you only receive a bite on your neck.
Your yelp makes them both laugh, suddenly pulling away from you to look at you fully, all three of you trying to catch your breaths. Their hold leaves you, challenging you, maybe to see if you would run, but to your own surprise you do nothing other than rubbing your legs together. “Stand up.” You nod after a split second, crawling back a little so you could stand up on your shaking legs, just like they asked you to.
They immediately follow your lead, making you nearly double over by their looming height, gasping when they both grab you, picking you off your feet. The embarrassment of feeling your cunt quiver is quickly forgotten as you swing your feet in the air, till you are pulled into your room. Your eyes glance at your window, cracked open, like you carelessly left it. When you feel them put you down on your carpet the memory is thrown out of the window, when they manhandle you, turning you around, before pushing you down on the bed.
The pink duvet wrinkles under your weight, watching them slowly lower themselves on either side of you. Your eyes firstly meet Jeongin’s, his gaze unnaturally soft for a moment, eyes half lidded, flickering down to your bitten lips and you can’t help, but do the same. He leans ever so slightly towards you, but you are swiftly pulled away from him by his friend, who gives you a long, deep look, before smashing his lips to yours.
His tongue breaches your lips immediately, swirling around yours and you desperately try to keep up with his pace. Drool — his and yours mix together, rolling past your lips. He swallows the small sounds you let out, hand gripping at your leg tightly. It seemed way more possessive, fingers digging into you so deeply, you know it will bruise permanently. Seungmin breathes through his nose heavily, fucking your mouth with his tongue and it must be considered anything, but a kiss at that point. Then you however feel a hand sneaking its way up your back, till it buries itself into your hair, tugging harshly. It makes you pull away from the brunette, who bites down at your lip, almost like tugging you back to him. A small hiss leaves you, but it is torn away from you hallway when Jeongin pulls you by your hair to his own lips.
His kiss is a little softer, more precise, not overly using his tongue right away to build up the tension. Spit is literally rolling down your neck, pooling at the valley of your breasts, leaning into the blonde just a little more, when his own hand meets your thigh. Another lips travel up your neck, kissing your jawline, cheek, till you feel Seungmin swiping his tongue across yours and Jeongin’s. “Fuck-“ Your small curse isn’t even heard, both of them pressing their bodies to yours, tongues licking into your open mouth.
The sighs from all of you melt into one, your heart hammering against your chest, letting them both kiss you messily. You don’t even know who is who at this moment. Who is biting down on your lower lip, who is swiping their tongue across your gums and teeth — you don’t even register one of them pulling away from you. Your mind is completely empty, so soaked that you can feel your shorts and your duvet sticking to your pulsating pussy. You are drunk of a simply kiss that felt so much more than anything that you left, when you were pleasuring yourself downstairs in the living room.
When you are pulled away from the mouth latching onto yours, it makes your eyes flicker open, only meeting Seungmin’s crazed eyes. His lips shine, puffy and red, swiping his thumb across yours to clean up the drool across your them. “Sit on his face, baby–“ Your eyes momentarily widened at such words, just noticing the shifting on your bed behind you, making you turn around and see the blonde laying on his back horizontally on the mattress. “Maybe, you can finally shut him up–“ Seungmin laughs, ignoring the glare on Jeongin’s face, it melting when meeting your eyes.
You bite your lip, already raw, trailing your eyes over his lean body, that is still covered completely. Your body moves on its own, sitting up, reaching to touch him. Being on your hands and knees, you feel Seungmin’s hands finding your hips, squeezing and grabbing a handful. It makes you tremble a little, crawling your way up to the blonde, eyes staring down at his sharp cheekbones and plush lips. But when you go to swing your leg over his body, facing him, you only receive a nasty smack on your cheek.
Another startled yelp leaves you, feeling your skin ripple and burn from the slap, turning around to glare at Seungmin, but he only finds the expression on you was adorable. “Turn around.” You frown a little, confused, turning back to look at man laying before you and when he taps his lips with his index finger your eyebrows raise in realization.
Too much — it was all so much for you, but your body acts on its own, turning around on your knees, your backside facing the blonde, before you finally swing your leg over his body to straddle his chest. You needed a moment to breathe, to calm yourself down, but he doesn’t let you even fully settle in this new position. His hands fly to your hips, squeezing just like his friend did, who now faces you, before roughly pulling you closer to his face. A gasp leaves you, falling forward, back arching, your chin hitting the bulge covered by his cloak, stilling when his flattened tongue licks over your barely covered cunt.
Moaning, your eyes glance at Seungmin whose eyes go back and forth between your body and your contracting face which you bashfully hide in the dark cloth beneath you. You try to move just a little, to sit up maybe, legs not strong enough in this position, but Jeongin doesn’t seem particularly against in sticking his whole face in to you. You can feel him everywhere — tongue licking over your slicked slit, mouth sucking in your lips, teeth grazing over your pulsating clit, nose digging in hole. “Too much — fuck!” Your legs already shake, face smushed against his leg, grazing his twitching cock.
Jeongin pulls away from you with a sharp inhale, chuckling at your trembling legs, hands running over the swell of your ass. “Come on, baby. We know you can take it.” You moan, not sure if it’s in agreement or disagreement, spit covered lips soaking his cloak. You only whine more, when he suddenly lifts his hips effortlessly, even with you being on top of him.
While trying to catch your breath a little, letting the man under you play with you — sqeezing your flesh, sucking meanly at your thighs, you didn’t even notice the other getting off the bed. The blonde pulls your lips apart, groaning at the sight of your dripping hole. “Fuck, look at that–“ A familiar long hum echoes around the room, making you tilt your head, gaze only meeting Seungmin’s. You don’t even know how he got behind you, but that doesn’t seem as important as the sight of his cock in his hand.
With wide eyes and blurry vision you watch his hand go up and down the length, smearing his own precum over himself and you whimper softly at the veins running from the base all the way to his flushed tip. Your small noise only breaks in a loud mewl when you feel the blonde’s tongue licking you up again, long and rough, before you are left speechless when he shuffles a little more to the edge of the bed. “You are dripping, baby — gonna fuck you nice and good right now, okay?” You look at him with big eyes, feeling Jeongin, sliding under you, latching right on your clit.
You can’t move an inch from the growing pleasure, shaking again already, freezing for a second when you feel the tip of the brunette’s cock kissing your entrance. Jeongin doesn’t seem to be put off, actually nibbling a little at you, while Seungmin starts to bottom out. The sweet burn from the sheer thickness melts away with the tongue moving your clit from side to side, making you grip tightly onto Jeongin’s legs, face bumping into his own cock that twitches all the same like the one now kissing your cervix.
Your walls suck him right in, back arching even more, grinding down on the cock inside you and the tongue licking your cunt. “Hear that?” Your ears perk up at the words, feeling Seungmin pull out his cock, before fucking back into you with a filthy, nasty smack! as your skins meet. “You are a fucking slut — greedy for a cock and a mouth at the same time–“ You hum dumbly in agreement, face hot at the sound of Jeongin spitting and slurping at you. “That asshole wouldn’t even know what to do with this hungry cunt of yours — would he Jeongin?”
His friend unlatches from you, though his tongue still licks at your folds, letting the man over him snap his hips back into you, before picking up pace that makes you see stars. “No.” You don’t even make a sound for a second there, mouth hanging open at the way Seungmin’s cock kisses the spot inside you that you have trouble reaching yourself. The lack of answer from your side gives you a sharp bite on your right thigh, Jeongin teeth breaching the sensitive skin with a wide smile. “Answer us — would he be able to make you feel like this?” Another smack lands on your ass, Seungmin’s now naked hand grabbing a handful of your bouncing flesh.
“No!” You cry out, sobbing almost when the blonde suck your clit into his mouth, gripping at your trashing hips. “N–never–“ Your whole face rubs against Jeongin’s cock, making a wet spot appear right over his tip from your drooling .
“Fuck, yeah, he wouldn’t.” Seungmin is cocky and you can hear the proud smirk on his face from the way your hips start to meet his. You don’t even want to move — can’t even, your muscles and nerves doing it for you. It only makes you back up into Jeongin’s nose, moaning as it hits your clit perfectly. “So good–“ Praises the brunette, slapping his palm over your already bruised skin, his eyes fighting to stay open when your insides starts to pulse around him.
“I am — I-I–“
“Gonna cum, huh?” He is mocking you, but the sight of your ass bouncing on his cock and his friend’s tongue just lightly grazing over him, makes his own hips shutter. “That soon?” The blonde under you response by pushing the tip of his tongue hard against your poor clit.
“Please-” You whisper, mind a mess from the burn coming from your clit and stretched out hole.
“What do you think, Jeongin?” You want to moan in protest, pleading quietly to the man under you, who has been torturing with his tongue for the longest time. “Should we let her cum?” Seungmin asks, though not stopping thrusting into you.
The named man nods firstly, the move with his mouth latched on you, nearly taking you over the edge, but he separates from you just as you felt the first spark of your peak. “She’s been good — so responsive–“ You hate how even now they are playing with you, not knowing that they are doing it just to spite you — to completely ruin you for anyone else…there will not be anyone else. “I want you to cum all over my mouth.” Mumbles Jeongin in your pussy, swirling his tongue hard over your tingling clit.
“Fuck, please…yes–“ Loud gasp leaves you when you feel the tip of Seungmin’s cock hitting the plushy spot inside you. “Don’t stop.” Your words die on your tongue, falling forward, the only thing keeping you somewhat up were their hands digging into your soft skin. Your lower tummy rumbles, the sudden burn coming from your clit is so much that you want to escape the feeling, but they are too strong.
The incoming pleasure is so close — so sharp and intense, that you feel your whole body being set on fire. You shake, sobbing and moaning loudly, muffled by your mouth digging into Jeongin’s cock that twitches under you. Seungmin buries into you deeper, his hand finding your hair to pull your head back so they both could hear what they were doing to you. With a single last suck of lips, cock ramming into you in a delicious pace that makes you almost black out, you finally cum, coating the brunette’s cock and the blonde’s face in your juices.
You see white for a second, feeling your hole push out the cock still moving in you, giving Seungmin no choice, but to pull out of you. A flow of your juices and pleasure come leaking out of you and straight to Jeongin’s face and you in exhaustion flop down on him. “Holy shit— didn’t know you were a squirter.” Your features would have shown shock at the words, but you are completely drained from energy, whimpering, because you can’t seem to ride down this mind shattering orgasm.
You feel someone flipping you around, the blonde shuffling away from you, letting you flop down back on the bed. The ceiling dances in shapes, your chest rising heavily, stretching your hand to push your hair off your face only to met plastic in the way. Turning your head to the side you only find one of their masks right next to you and you find yourself trailing your fingers over the sleek white face. “Baby…” You tiredly look down the length of your body, meeting their gazes that spark with a new emotion. “You like it?”
You genuinely think of a right answer, turning to look back at the mask, that right now didn’t seem so scary. You hate yourself — you know that it isn’t because they fucked you so good, you truly can feel your pussy fluttering at the memory of them wearing it. Then you only nod, not trusting your own voice and they both melt a little at the cute wonder on your face. Seungmin is the first one to move, hands trailing up your thighs, meeting with the waistband of your shorts. You help him take them off, the garment completely unnecessary. Jeongin on the other hand goes a little higher — firstly just grabbing a handful of your tits, nipples digging into his palms, before he as well helps you take off the last piece of clothing.
Their sweet behavior makes your chest fill with warmth, but you can’t ignore the darkness in their eyes, that drink in your naked body. Hands are everywhere on you — mostly groping the new exposed flesh of your tits, pinching meanly at your nipple, each giving you a harsh suck on the swell of your breasts, marking you. You take your chance to finally touch them, running your hands through their hair, gripping their shoulders, feeling their muscles spasm under your fingers. Your legs are spread open, Seungmin’s cock rubbing against your thigh, while Jeongin fumbles with something behind you.
They detach their mouths from you, making you look down your body, noticing hickeys, blotches and bruises covering you. A ruffle of clothing catches your attention, noticing firstly how the blonde kneeling beside your head uncovers his lower half. You inhale, staring at the bulge in his pants, before looking up at him, only to be left speechless again. He is wearing the mask…you don’t how he was able to put it on so quickly, but you are still drowsy of your orgasm, vision a blur.
Watching him undo his belt and zipper you instantly go to sit up on your arms, only to be pulled down a little on the bed. Seungmin tugged at your ankle, just like on the stairs and now even with the same mask on his face. The feeling of having not the privilege to see their pretty faces, making you instead stare at the Ghostface mask makes you oh, so needy. You can just feel their grins on you — the blonde tugging at your roots to turn your head to face his now uncovered cock.
“Will you be good and take both of us?” You bite your lip, eyes going from the long veiny cock with deliciously flushed tip to his masked face, air getting caught in your throat at the use of the voice changer.
Nodding, you blink slowly, trying to unstick your teary eyelashes to fully imprint this view in your mind. You feel hand trail over your stomach, squeezing at your soft tummy, while the cock before you pokes at your lips, smearing precum all over you. “Gonna fuck my cum right here–“ Says the brunette, pressing down on your tummy. “You’ll be mine.”
“Ours.” Hisses Jeongin through his teeth, when you wrap your lips around his tip, sucking the salty taste of him in your mouth. The sneer is obvious in his tone and as response the older snaps his hips into yours, burying his cock in you in one go.
Your squeal is muffled by the cock in your mouth, hand smoothing down your messy hair, but the sweet gesture doesn’t match his or his friend’s movements. You almost choke around him as he hits the back of your throat, because Seungmin started to chase quickly and roughly for his own orgasm. You can tell by the way he rolls his hips into yours — humping you more and more than fucking you, gasps and curses flying out his mouth that he definitely won’t last that much longer like before.
Drool rolls down face again, eyes filling up with tears, while you still look at the man fucking your mouth. He is slow with it, yet hard, keeping in mind that you might not be able to catch up with him when his company is so busy with molding your pussy into the shape of his cock. You are already over the line of overstimulation, your cunt swallowing hungrily Seungmin’s cock and when he suddenly presses his thumb over the top of your clit your eyes roll back into your skull, legs shaking around his hips. “You, slut — look at you swallowing my cock, bet you are about to cum again, hm?” You grip his hips tightly between your legs, trying to get much needed oxygen through your nose, head swirling from the incoming pleasure.
“Look at me — when I’m fucking-“ The low, rough voice makes you look at its owner, moaning around Jeongin, when you notice the desperation in Seungmin’s movements. “Yes, yes — keep squeezing me like that — fuck!” You whimper loudly, hand stretching to make the brunette slow down a little as you feel the second orgasm of the night creeping up on you. The blonde pulls out his drenched cock from your mouth, making you instantly moan breathlessly, eyes on Seungmin, who throws the voice changer somewhere to grab your hips to fully fuck into you, . “Cum for me — cum with me, come on, baby — yeahhh-“
No sound leaves your lips, when you hit the peak of your pleasure, body shaking violently as you feel Seungmin’s cock twitch. His warm cum fills you right after, pressing his whole cock so deep inside you, that you fear for a second that he breeched your cervix. Groaning, he falls on his knees before you, head hanging low, only to realize as he pulls his down his mask, that he is staring at where your bodies meet, watching his cum leak out of, forming a creamy ring around his cock. “Still not full?” Says Jeongin and you watch him tore his own mask off, running his hand through his messed up hair.
“I can’t no more–“ You plea, but the sight before you makes your cunt only clap down on the cock still inside you. The younger one eyes the older, looking into his eyes before wrapping his hand around the base of his cock to pull him out of you. You don’t know if it was because of his orgasm or the mesmerizing sight of your hole leaking his cum, but he lets Jeongin shove him off you to fill in his position.
He crawls up your body, kissing your left nipple, before meeting your lips in a sweet kiss. “You can — just hold on, I got you.” You moan tiredly, twitching, when he puts his cock to your clit teasingly. “Have to fill you up too.” You look up at him with big eyes, the intimate position making your chest swell and it seems like it does it for him too.
You let him grab your legs, a little shocked by him pushing them all the way to your ears, but you are a complete mess to care anymore, muscles jello. His cock breaching your stuffed pussy, makes a nasty wet sound echo around the room. Whimpering, while the blonde moans, long fingers digging into the cushion on each side of your head, you lock your legs together behind his back. You watch — mesmerized by the sweat dripping down his face, hair sticking to his forehead as he rams his cock into you, not even letting you breath for a second.
Your eyes shoot open again, fighting against your tiredness, wildly staring into his eyes, mewling at each snap of his hips, the sticky release of his friend smearing across the both of you. “Fuck, you are so right, Y/N.” You hum between each snap of his hips, head rolling back, when his happy trail scratches your completely bruised clit.
“Ah! Ah — Jeongin, can’t–“ Your whole bottom half burns, but it still was so good that you found yourself drowning in the pleasure.
Your head is turned back, vision nothing, but small black spots, but you recognize the hand holding you. “Cum for him, Y/N-“ Seungmin says, laying beside you and your eyes meet the blonde’s at the words. It was like a command — they had the complete power over your mind and body. “Just one more…” A sob breaks out of you, gasping then when Jeongin hits your spot particularly hard. You need to feel something more — so, you lean in to press your lips to his and the unexpected gesture leaves his thrusts shattering into a stop, groaning into your mouth.
This one takes you completely out of your body, feeling yourself squirt ones again, so hard you swear you could hear your orgasm dripping out of you. But the thing you do feel is the cum filling you, mixing with yours and the other’s. You can feel the light kisses on your skin — you can hear the words both degrading and encouraging. Your ringing ears are filled with sweet nothings, your eyes not able to tell apart the room and faces before you — but you do see the obvious.
You are insane in the brain.
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delulumel ¡ 27 days ago
Text
HALLOWEEN NIGHT.
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pairing: bangchan x afab reader blurb: drunk and high one night, you decide to confide in your best friend about one of your darkest fantasies. he decides to help you out with the fantasy, because what kind of best friend would he be if he didn't, right? tags: consensual non consent (cnc), mask kink, semi-public sex, hair pulling, knife kink, dirty talk (praise and degradation), size kink, unprotected sex (wrap it up please and stay safe!), mate pressing, angst, use of little red (reader is wearing a red riding hood costume), baby, ladybug and pet. wc: 7.6k+ (edited, but no beta reading) a/n: this was written half high, half sober. i hope you love it! i know i haven't being online much this (last) year, but i have set a few deadlines for myself this year and i hope to achieve them. happy new year!
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You look over at Chan one more time before tipping back your cup of beer down your lips. The flush of the alcohol in your system as it made its way down your throat had your back melting against the couch you were sitting on.
Chan’s head tips forward, and his hands come up to press a palm against his forehead, a low strangled groan slipping past his lips. He hadn’t taken off his jacket when he had started hosting the party earlier, and now you could see the effects of partying the last twenty hours away looked like.
The jacket was slick with his sweat, and you found yourself itching to take it off him completely. You wanted to see his skin and touch and press your lips to him, but you knew what everyone else knew. To Chan, you were just his best friend from childhood that he was almost completely unattracted to and had nothing for.
But to you?
You push away the thoughts as you drop your cup on the floor, straightening up to crack your joints. Chan had asked you to co-host, and as best friend of the year award, you had said yes.
That simple statement ignited a chain of wildfires that had happened that night. You sigh, standing up and ignoring the way the beer sloshed around in your system. You would sleep after tidying up the place a little. 
You start to pick up the leftovers, arranging them in a pile over by the corner. The repetitive movement cleared your head a little, and by the time you were done with the whole den, you felt relatively sober.
Sober enough to wake Chan up and take him up the stairs to his room.
You grit your teeth as you make your way over to the couch and pull him up. You nearly collapsed under his weight, and you get a mental reminder. Chan may look small, but he didn’t play around with his body. You heave, pushing yourself up to a standing position as you take the first step forward.
Chan’s musk and cologne drift into your nose as you make your way up the stairs, and you have to hold your breath at a point because you were sure he was hearing how much you were breathing him in.
You finally made it up to his room, and Chan’s autopilot kicked in from there. He completely got off you and made his way to his bed, taking off his clothes as he got closer to his bed till he was simply wearing boxer briefs.
The routine was as familiar to you as the back of your palm, but you never got over seeing Chan’s body silhouetted in whatever light was streaming in through his windows. He was glorious, like a statute of old. You felt like you were reverencing something of God’s pure creation and you held your breath till he fell forward on his bed.
You sigh, stripping off your pants and top, picking up his sweatshirt on the floor as you climb onto the bed, before slipping his shirt on and snuggling under the covers. Chan immediately shifts, making room for you.
In the last year since you had started doing this routine with Chan, he had always stayed on his side of the bed, no matter how gone he was. But this night? He turns over and pulls you in by your waist, tucking your back to his chest.
His heat immediately spreads over you and before you can speak, Chan does, his lips directly against your ear. “You know I always mean to tell you thank you. For putting up with my childish ass. For always being there for me. I’m going to turn it around this year. And to make it up to you, I would fulfill whatever favour you want…Sexual or otherwise.”
Your breath catches in your chest, and you bite your lip, deciding to fake sleep. Chan knows you better than that, so he lifts his hand and smacks your hip, groaning. “Stop. I know you are awake, Ladybug. Answer me.”
“Nothing.”
“You don’t expect me to believe that, do you?”
“It is actually nothing, Chan. Go to bed.”
“I have my ways of finding out, Ladybug. You know that. Isn’t it better for you to tell me now?”
You are quiet for so long, the memories of what your last ex said to you when you told him about this cropping up into your head. You couldn’t tell Chan that. He would leave you alone, just like everyone else.
You are about to say it’s nothing when Chan moves, tugging you under him as he shifts up on his palms. The move makes him hover over you, and you are even more aware of how his scent drifts into your nose.
Chan’s full gaze on you suddenly has you fighting the urge to squirm. Your best friend was many many things, including unbelievably stunning. Looking at him was enough to make you believe in a higher entity. 
His features are so perfectly arranged and fit in his face, and when Chan smiled, with his full face and eyes, you could swear he was an angel. He had to be an angel. It made no other sense.
“I can tell when you are hiding something, Ladybug. Come on. Tell me. You know I wouldn’t judge.” His voice is smoky, and it was pouring over you like a cup of honey slides down your throat in the morning.
You open your mouth, the words getting stuck somewhere in your throat, and the intensity of his gaze on you makes you finally look away. Your eyes land on the alarm clock on his bedside table, and it makes you remember a particular fact.
Before Chan crashed out after a party, he never remembered anything you said to him when you were in bed together.
You had told him about your ex last time, and from the way he had hugged Nick earlier this night, you were sure he couldn’t remember. Chan was fiercely protective of you, and learning that Nick cheated on you would make Chan end anything that amounted to Nick’s social life on campus.
The information has your tongue loosening. “I want to be chased down. And then fucked.” 
You close your eyes, and Chan shifts above you, and you can feel his eyes on your face. “Fucked? Like forced?”
The two words leaving his mouth made it sound so sinfully delicious, and you were suddenly aware of how drunk you still were, even though you felt sober. This was wrong.
You nod, swallowing. “Yes. I want it to hurt sometimes. Have someone pin me down and have their way with me. To force me into submission.”
Chan is so quiet that you immediately regret speaking, and you are about to push him off you when his hand comes up to rest on your neck, pinning you in place. “So, say the person had you like this, you would want that?”
The room is so silent that you are sure a pin could have dropped and you would be aware of it, but you still refuse to open your eyes and look at him. “I would put up a struggle, but yes. I would want it.”
Chan moves off you in one swift move, and you feel your chest loosen. You hadn’t even known there was a tightness in it before. You hear Chan land on his side of the bed, and you shift onto your side, opening your eyes to look at the alarm clock.
It wasn’t even up to twenty minutes since you looked at it last, but the minute between you and Chan had felt like a century. It was as if you had been thrown into an alternate world where time moved much much slower.
Chan is silent, and you turn over a little, and you immediately notice his position. Chan usually slept in one particular way, and when you teased him about it, he complained that it was because he shared a room with his friends during their bi-annual road trips.
He was already sleeping. 
You can’t tell if the shake in your chest is disappointment or relief, and you turn back on your side, pressing your eyes closed. You can still hear his low breathing, and you start counting backwards from ten as you try to regulate yours.
You had already told Chan, so there was nothing you could do now but sleep, and pray that he already forgot when you both woke up the next morning.
“You feel it in your system, you want it more.”
Chan woke up first, and the first thing you notice when you open your eyes is the smell of fresh coffee and bacon. Chan lived in a huge apartment that wasn’t so far from your campus, and he had bought it with one of his other best friends, Changbin.
You immediately pull on one of his sweatpants, tightening the waistband as you move downstairs. The apartment was big enough to contain over twelve rooms, with a basement gym and movie theater. You hadn’t understood the need for that much space till you met the other six occupants, apart from Chan and Changbin.
Half of them were already in the dining room, nursing steaming cups of coffee. Felix brightens up when he sees you enter, his usually messy hair pulled back into a ponytail at his nape. “You are up earlier than Chan was expecting.”
It was an inside joke that Chan and you were in a relationship, and no matter how much you tried to convince them otherwise, the rest of the gang didn’t believe it. You were sure they teased you sometimes just for the sole fact of getting you worked up.
“When was he expecting me?” You slide into the seat across from him, sitting opposite Seungmin, who had his head on the table. He was the one controlling the DJ booth yesterday with Han and Chan, so you are surprised to see him at the table.
“After his shower.” Hyunjin answers before Felix can, making the latter smack his arm. Hyunjin looks refreshingly fresh, and you wince when you glance down at your outfit. You could tell he was on his way out just by looking at him, and it explained his absence last night.
Chan walks into the dining room, balancing four plates on his arm, Minho behind him. Chan’s face breaks into a smile when he sees you, and everyone else at the table groans.
“Great, now we are subjected to being third wheels again.” Seungmin grumbles this as he lifts his head, swiping one plate from Chan immediately he reaches the dining table. Seungmin tosses a bacon into his mouth, ignoring the glare from Chan.
“How did you sleep, Ladybug?” Chan places the other three plates on the table, before pushing one in your direction. Minho places two plates down on the table and throws you a warm smile before sitting down next to Hyunjin.
“It was great. Breakfast woke me up.” You gingerly spear a bacon with your fork, and Chan doesn’t sit down like you were expecting. He stands instead, his eyes flickering. Your heart catches in your throat, almost expecting him to bring up last night and what happened in his bed after, but Chan just smiles.
“Great! I was hoping it would. I am just going to shower. You remember Jay is expecting us for our project, so you better hurry. I would drop you off at home to shower up and change.” He drops a kiss to your forehead before breezing out of the kitchen, and your heart is heavy with longing as you watch him go.
Minho’s voice breaks you out of the trace, and you start with surprise. “I know we all joke about it, but when are you going to tell him that you are in love with him? I am pretty sure everyone but Chan can tell by now.”
You flinch, glaring at him, but Minho just shrugs, turning to Hyunjin. “I am not lying, am I?”
Hyunjin also ignores your glare as he spreads avocado over his toast, before sprinkling salt on top of it. “I am sorry to disappoint you, Sugar, but Minho is right. It is sickeningly obvious. Even a blind bat could tell if they just spent time with the two of you.”
Seungmin laughs, almost spilling his coffee everywhere and you sigh, resting your head back on your chair. “He doesn’t feel the same, and I am sure that it will pass soon enough. I just don’t want him to think I am one of his fangirls or anything.”
Felix rolls his eyes before snorting, and he passes off one of his bacon strips to Seungmin’s plate. “If it makes you sleep better at night, darling, I wouldn’t say anything more.”
You don’t say anything else as you finish your breakfast, and when 
Chris had invited you for his Halloween party, this time as a guest and not a co host. That was the only reason you had agreed, but you currently wished you were back in your bed.
The turnout was massive, and you could tell Chris was thriving. He always did, especially when he was the center of attention.
The house lights are blurring your vision and the music's loud enough that it starts to hurt your head. The strap of your bra slips, and you yank it up before turning to Chan, who was still looking at his phone and nursing a red cup. 
“I am going upstairs. I might head up to your room, just to change and sleep.” You have to step close enough that his scent is wrapped around your nose and settling somewhere between your skin for him to hear you, and you pull back to see Chan nod.
His Ghostface mask is obscuring your view of his eyes, but his hand drops to cup yours, before squeezing once. “I will wrap the party myself, Ladybug. You have done enough. Go ahead.”
Chan smacks your hip, and your cheeks flush crismon, and you pray the party lights hide it from him as you step past him, heading up towards the back steps. Chan had sealed off the main stairs leading upstairs after a few partygoers had started using the bedrooms for sex, and you still shivered when you remember how livid he was.
You are about to take off your hood and reach for the door knob when you feel someone coming up from behind you, and before you know it, a pair of hands blocks your vision. Your first instinct is to knee them in the balls with the heel of your boots, but a low voice vibrates in your ear and your anger clears.
You would recognize that voice anywhere, even in your sleep.
“Boo, Little Red.”
You sigh with annoyance, pushing Chan off. He laughs as he steps back, and you turn to face him, and you can’t see his face, but you know he has a sheepish expression on. “That wasn’t funny, Christopher.”
Your use of his full name makes him flinch, but he just slips his hands under those robes, and into what you assumed is his pockets. “I was thinking about something. You know the path to the rooftop gardens, right?”
He waits until you nod before he starts speaking again. "Do you remember what you told me that night in bed?"
He doesn't have to clarify, and you feel your cheeks flush red as you immediately close your mouth to say something, but Chan laughs, raising his hand. "Ladybug, it's fine. I am not disgusted. I am not Nick."
You flinch, and Chan's voice turns into pure venom, making goosebumps spread up over your arms. "I assure you that that bastard would not be disturbing you ever again."
The words jumble around in your throat, but all that leaves your mouth is "You remember everything I tell you."
Chan laughs, and it is a low smoky sound that has your heart racing. "I do, Ladybug. I am sorry for making it seem like I haven't, but I knew you wouldn't talk about it otherwise. And I would take everything I can get of you."
You are sure the shock and confusion is written all over your face because Chan steps forward, holding your hands. "I want to do that with you. I need to know if you trust me to do that. If you trust me to do that here...and now."
He tips the bottom of his mask up, placing his Ghostface mask at the top of his head and exposing his face, and you see his eyes, and the clatter in your head comes to a shrieking stop, and Chan smiles. "If you don't want to, we go to my room and watch anime and forget this ever happened."
The unspoken but lingered in the air, and you found yourself melting the longer his eyes stayed on you. You wanted it with Chan, and this entire moment felt like a fever dream, but you wanted to be selfish. "I trust you, Christopher."
Chan groans, shaking his head. "You have to stop calling me that. Come on, get into the room." He didn't let you answer, reaching behind you to open the room to his door and push you inside, shutting the door shut behind you.
"Sit." The pure command in his voice has you moving, and you take a seat on his bed, watching him come to stand in front of you. He folds his arms around his chest, and even under the robes he was wearing, you could make out the build of his arms.
You push down the desire bubbling through you as Chan's lips purse, and he clears his throat. "You should have a safe word prepared, but I am going to tell you what my plan is."
Chan comes to stand in front of you, dropping to a squat. He is careful to not touch you, but you wished he would. "I am going to chase you up to the roof. Then I would pin you down and use my knife on you. If you want us to go further, we will. Otherwise, I am fine ending things there."
"Knife?" You echo, and Chan smirks, and a shiver of fear dances down your spine. He brings out a small penknife from underneath his robes, before pressing against the skin above your garter.
The cool steel of the knife is like pure fire against your heated skin, and you can't stop the moan from spilling out your mouth. Chan's eyes flash with heat, but his hand doesn't shake. "I wouldn't cut you, unless you want that."
He didn't make it a question, but it might as well have been one. You shake your head, and Chan lifts the knife off your skin immediately. You try to keep the disappointment from showing on your face, but when Chan smirks, you are reminded that you can't hide anything from him.
"That's it. You can try to push me off, but I assure you wouldn't be able to. If I am going too far but you want to continue, tap any part of my body three times." He gets to his feet, and you have to crane your head back to stare up into his face. "Do you have a safe word?"
"Vodka." You say, referencing the liquor that you both drank the first time you had met. From the way Chan smiles, you know he got the connection.
"Okay, Ladybug. One more thing. Am I allowed to kiss you?" He grabs your arm, yanking you up. You nearly collapse into his arms before he steadies you, and you take a small step back.
"It's fine." You say, feeling your palms get sweaty. You had seen him kissing other people before, of both genders, and you had longed to be the one behind his lips. You couldn't believe it was about to happen.
Chan smiles, one of his bright genuine smiles that lit up his entire face and made your stupid foolish heart beat like it was pumped up on adrenaline in your chest.
"Great. Are you ready? I am inclined to give you a headstart." He steps back as he speaks, tugging his mask back over his face. He cocks his head, watching you wipe your palms on your skirt.
"I am ready." You step forward towards the door, pressing your hand on the door handle and push it open, and the thrill starts to burn its way through your system. You can hear Chan behind you, and before you step your foot over the threshold, he starts talking.
“Immediately your foot goes over that frame, the game is on. You got that, right?” His voice is muffled because of the mask, but you can hear him as clear as day anyway. You knew his voice like the back of your own hand.
Chan is silent, and you glance over your shoulders to see him bending down to take off his shoes. Instinct spikes its way through your muscles, and you immediately jump forward, taking off running. You can hear Chan laughing behind you, but it doesn’t make you slow down.
You can hear your heart beating funny in your chest, and the pounding is enough to give you a headache. You cut through the gym rooms, heading for the other hallway. It would mean you would have to climb an additional flight of steps, but you don’t care.
“Don’t run from me, little Red. You know I would catch you regardless.” Maybe it’s the excitement, but Chan’s voice sounds menacing, and you can’t stop the shiver that climbs up your spine.
You yank your skirt up, even though it wasn’t restricting you and jump the flight of streets, hearing his heavy footsteps get faster behind you. You risk taking a look over your shoulder, and your heart leaps in your throat once you see the distance between the two of you. You grit your teeth as you move up the steps, before finally getting to the top and pushing the glass door open.
The rooftop was domed, and the boys had filled it with all sorts of things, since it was here almost everyone came to lounge and hang out. It was huge as well, meaning they had an infinite amount of possibilities when it came to furnishing the place, so you weren’t surprised someone put a bed.
You wouldn’t have minded Chan using the floor, but considering this was your first time doing this fantasy, you wanted it to be special. And comfortable. You haven’t stopped running, since the bed is on the far edge of the roof.
Behind you, you hear the distinct sound of the door opening and you curse, miscalculating a step. It makes your skirt hook in the joystick of an arcade machine, and you start tugging it out, breaking it free just as Chan caught up to you, ducking and grabbing low to get a hold of your ankle.
A scream gets stuck in your throat as you tip forward, and you fling out your hands to brace your fall.
You land against the carpeted grass, and you scream as Chan’s grip on your ankle tightens and he tugs you back, before his hands slide under your thighs and pick you up. Your scream cuts off as you land on his shoulders, and he walks you both over to the bed, before tossing you on it.
You spin around, both palms coming up to push him off you, but Chan was right. His body is like a rock, and a chuckle leaves his lips, making you shiver.
He grabs you, spinning you back to land on your stomach and pins you down with one hand on your neck. His other hand roams along your body, rubbing up and down your side, before squeezing your breast, and the hand on your neck grips your nape, giving it a light squeeze.
“You are so pretty like this, Ladybug.” You squirm and raise your hips off the bed as his hands move back down, teasing under the hem of your skirt. You don’t think as you kick, and Chan curses, his grip on you loosening enough that you can push him off you.
Scrambling on your hands and knees, you try to get off the bed, but you are not quick enough as he grabs you again, before pushing you flat on your stomach. Your face slams against one of the pillows as a garbled scream escapes you, and the sound falling from your lips coaxes a low chuckle out of him.
Chan has his hand back on your nape, a tighter grip this time, and you whine, pushing back against him. You bite the hand that’s beside your head, but Chan’s grip doesn’t budge and you are about to kick him again when he shifts position.
He leaves the hand on your nape, before settling down to hover above your spine, giving leverage to lift his free hand off the bed. You are about to try jerking again when you suddenly feel something cold press against the side of your neck, and you freeze on the spot.
His knife.
“There you go. I knew you could keep still for me.” There’s a dangerous undercurrent to Chan’s voice, one you have only heard once, and it sends shivers down your spine. You needed him. “Be a good little victim now, okay? I really don't want to hurt you with this. Don’t make me do that, okay, baby?”
His voice tells you he wouldn’t hesitate to use the knife on you like that, but the memory of his promise back in the bedroom isn’t enough to loosen the ache in your chest. You don't even dare to breathe at this point, because you can feel its metallic coolness as it teases against your delicate skin.
His hands leave your nape, and you hear fabric rustling. The pressure of the knife against your neck eases slightly and before you can exhale with relief, Chan curls one arm around your middle, pulling you back and flushing against him.
The position makes you sit back on your thighs, and you can feel his warmth leaking in through your clothes at your back, and you release a breath, trying to calm your thundering heart. “Let me go. I don't know what I did to you. I didn’t do anything.”
The words spill out of your throat, and you gasp when Chan raises his knife again, pressing the sharp tip against the side of your neck. You can’t stop the word from bursting out of your chest, and your voice trails off in a whimper as you tilt your body away. “Please!”
“Pity. But don’t worry, baby. I won't kill you,” Chan says quietly, and the mask is brushing up against the side of your face, and you knew if he didn’t have it on, you would feel his breath against your cheek.
Chan must notice your mind wandering because he makes a sound of disapproval in his throat as he starts pressing his other hand against your stomach. “I just want to have some fun. And I'm sure you do too. That’s all. You can do that for me, right?”
His words have the desired effect and a whimper leaves your throat as you press back against him, letting his fingers dance up and down your belly. 
This is Chan. Your Chan.
You can’t see his face, but you know Chan must have heard your whimper because his hand suddenly slips down your stomach, slipping under your skirt. A strangled gasp leaves your throat as his fingers curl right between your legs, before pressing against your underwear.
“Ah, you don’t even need to answer me, see? You are ready for this.” Chan’s voice snakes into your ear, before reaching down and tugging on your core, and you close your eyes as you feel yourself get slick with arousal.
“So wet. Maybe you have a knife kink?” Chan’s tone is menacing as he speaks, and before you can answer, he chuckles and simultaneously presses the blade against your throat just as his fingers slip between your wet folds, making you gasp and stiffen. 
His fingers felt so good. It has been so long, and you can’t stop the needy whimper from leaving your throat as you fight the urge to squirm. 
Chan pays no attention, instead leaving his fingers where they are as he keeps rubbing along the drenched fabric of your panties, teasing your entrance through the cloth. “Would you like to have something bigger in that cute little cunt, baby?”
You open your mouth to say something, but he cuts you off by pressing his groin against your back, and you can feel just how big he is. You always knew Chan was bigger than average. His ex girlfriends used to text you about it, but experiencing it in person was different.
“Well?” he whispers, rubbing his plastic mask against your cheek. You can hear his labored breathing through it now, and he seems just as excited as the wetness dripping against his fingertips makes you appear.
Chan was turned on. By you.
The feeling is enough to make you dizzy, and you croak out an affirmative answer. Chan nudges the side of your cheek with his mask, and you can hear a muffled “Good girl.”
You don’t have time to think or ponder it any longer, because Chan suddenly pushes you forward and you land on the bed again. You blink, shock rendering you immobile and you let him manhandle you onto your back. 
Chan moves again, and before you know it, he's crawled over you, pushing your skirt up and your legs wide apart, before holding them open with his knees.
Chan’s hands roam up your body, and you realize with a start that he has dropped the knife somewhere, and his fingers knead your breasts through the fabric of your top, briefly scattering your train of thought. “What a good girl. So submissive. You have no idea how much you please me, mhm?”
His words make you shiver. You inhale sharply when his rough hands make contact with your soft breasts as they slip right beneath your bra, pushing it up, and you can't help pressing your chest against his touch, wanting more. 
He's strangely gentle in how he touches you, despite the power he clearly has over you, and it only adds to your arousal, making you squirm beneath him.
“Little Red's excited, huh?” he mocks as he gropes your tender tits until you feel your hard nipples pressing into his palms. “Don't worry, I'll fill you up in no time.”
His fingers grip the sides of your top, ripping it open and exposing you completely, before trailing over your stomach until he reaches to the side and grabs the knife again. “Maybe I want you to beg for it though. See how good you can be for me.”
You let out a surprised whimper when you feel the cold edge of the knife press between your breasts, teasing at the soft mounds. He's looming over you, his head tilted to the side, and you swallow hard, barely daring to move with the blade so close to your skin.
“Come on, Little Red, beg me to fuck you... or beg me not to kill you?”
Suddenly his hand is on your throat, and you gasp as he closes his fingers around it, while pressing the knife firmer against your chest, the blade scratching along your skin with every rapid breath you take, no matter how hard you try not to move.
“Please.” You whimper, a series of shivers crashing down your spine. “Don't... hurt me...”
Chan freezes, and you can feel the grip on your neck loosen, but his hand holding the knife doesn’t shake. “You would like it.”
He gives you no further warning as the knife pokes a little deeper, and you're sure it has broken your skin now, but he keeps holding your neck, keeping you in place. “Chan.”
Your whisper of his name makes him laugh, his laugh low and menacing. “What do you want, baby? I am not giving you anything until you say it.”
“Fuck me. Please. I am… I want it so bad. I want you so bad.” You are surprised at the steel in your voice, and from the way Chan’s hand twitches around your throat, you can tell you have gotten him.
“Good girl.”
Your head is still spinning as you feel his hands lifting your hips before his fingers pull your panties down. He's shifted to kneel beside you, and you realize Chan has placed his knife right on your fluttering stomach. 
Your hands claw at the edges of the pillow as you ground yourself, still not even thinking about fighting back or even escaping. 
Why would you? You've never felt this exhilarated. This was everything you had wanted, and it was Chan giving it to you.
You watch his dark figure, and you gasp as you notice that he already took off the long black robe and even if it’s too dark to make out his full figure, you know how he looks already. You can’t get rid of the image in your head even if you tried.
When his fingers are back between your legs, you gasp in surprise, blinking your eyes into focus as he rips you from your thoughts. His fingertips move expertly, and all you can do is squirm slightly, moaning softly the more he touches you. 
Suddenly he moves, hands on your thighs as he pushes your legs wide open, before he grabs the knife and teases the pointy tip down your stomach, over the fabric of your bunched up skirt, until you feel the cold metal against your inner thigh. 
You let out a croaked whimper, forcing yourself not to move too much. While he teases you with the blade, he puts his hand over your mound, pumping his palm against your wet folds until a lewd squelching sound rings in your ears that makes your head spin as your cheeks flush.
“Nice and wet for me, aren't you?” Chan mocks quietly, repeating the motions a few times before he pulls his hand back and probes two fingers against your core instead. You brace yourself for the intrusion, but you still cry out softly when he pushes inside you. 
Big hands with thick fingers, and two of his feel like four of yours, as he stretches your entrance and presses hard against your protesting muscles. You groan in response, thrashing your head back.
He keeps fingering you, his digits slipping in and out in a lazy rhythm that he mirrors with his knife as it scratches up and down your inner thigh, and every time he presses the blade harder against your skin, you feel your walls clenching around his fingers.
“You like that, huh?” Chan whispers menacingly. “Knife kink confirmed. Such a dirty girl.”
You bite your lip hard to suppress more telltale noises of pleasure, but Chan makes a sound of disapproval in his throat. “Don’t hold them back, baby. Let me hear you.” 
As if to buttress his point, his fingers switch their rhythm and his thumb brushes over your clit as he curls his fingers inside you, pushing up against your g-spot.
The tension starts to push up your spine, the pressure building almost relentlessly, borderline painful, but it's only when you suddenly feel the cold metal of the blade right against your throbbing clit that you snap apart with a loud mewl, and a broken litany of words leave your mouth as your hips start bucking up, and you no longer care about getting cut. The one focus that drives your head is to ride the waves of bliss, as if nothing else matters.
“Beautiful,” You hear Chan speak, but his voice is in the distance as you slowly come down from your high, and the stars in the sky are like bright lights dancing behind your eyelids. 
Your pussy walls flutter, and your eyes snap open as you feel him still massaging your walls as they contract around his fingers. “Can't wait to feel that around my cock, baby. You are perfect.”
You hear a soft clicking sound when he seems to fumble with his belt, the knife back on your belly. His hands are on your waist then, pulling you down a little until he drapes your legs over his thighs, guiding your crotches together. 
You barely register any of it, your mind reeling from your orgasm, but also anticipating the feel of his dick inside you. You don't have to think about it for long as you feel its tip pressing between your wet folds when he rubs it against you to gather your slick. 
Breathing harder, you open your eyes, trying to watch him. The moonlight is enough now to show you how he looks like a big strong body kneeling between your legs, and his glowing mask makes it all a little eerie, but when he finally enters you, you don't care about appearances anymore. He feels glorious.
Big, oh so big, filling you out more than you would have expected as he presses deeper, nudge by nudge, little rolls of his hips until he bottoms out inside you. 
His hands dig into your waist, holding you against him, and you feel bruises forming, but you don't mind, you need this. His first thrust makes the knife on your stomach bounce, and you gasp loudly. The second is equally harsh as he withdraws slowly to slam back in with force.
When he finally settles into a slow but steady rhythm, you're mewling softly, overwhelmed by how he feels inside you, how your walls cling to his shaft, sucking him in and dragging along it with every push and pull, rubbing so deliciously you feel a scorching tension building up inside you, burning brighter with every snap, every deep plunge, filling you up more and more.
His hands leave your waist to grab your throat, turning your soft moans into loud gasps, as he slowly picks up the pace and rams into you, using his hold on your neck as leverage to angle his pelvis against you, allowing him to hit all the good spots with ease.  
You cry out over and over again, your eyes rolling back, the last thing you see is that ominous white mask above you, before you come hard around him, clamping down on his pistoning cock, your wetness gushing past him as you convulse beneath him.
You feel lightheaded, blinded by bliss, barely able to breathe, but you couldn't care less. He fucks you through your literally mind-blowing orgasm, pushing you higher and higher, until you feel it building up all over again. He lets go of your throat, allowing you to cry out hoarsely as you come again.
He pushes you down into the bed, one hand on your shoulder, holding you steady, while his other hand grabs the knife off your stomach, and you only realize that when you feel the cold blade against your cheek, gathering your sweat on its tip. 
Or maybe your tears, you can't be sure, your body feels like it belongs to somebody else at the moment, and you're just here to enjoy the ride.
“Open wide,” Chan tells you, his voice muffled and strained, and you comply, parting your lips before you feel the blunt edge of the blade pressing against them.
“Tongue out.” 
You follow through, still too dizzy to question anything.
He presses the knife flat against your tongue, holding it there while he keeps pounding his cock into your fluttering cunt. 
You can hear his labored breaths from behind the mask, his movements becoming jerkier as you just lie there, staring up at him, goosebumps rippling over your skin as your legs twitch against his sides.
Your own sounds are muffled with how he holds your mouth open, and you have to really force yourself not to move your tongue against the blade. 
Chan leans down more, putting more of his weight on you, pinning you down, his hips snapping against yours in a wild rhythm, until he finally stills, a loud groan echoing in your ears as he falls forward, mask pressed to the pillow beside your head, the hand holding the knife to your tongue shaking slightly.
That last thrust made you whine as he pushed as deep as he could possibly go, bullying your cervix, and your mind is swimming in bliss as you feel him throbbing inside you, his balls drawing up against your folds as he empties himself in your depths, filling you with spurt after spurt of hot cum. 
You clench around him, trying to milk him, and the motion only makes you moan into the blade pressed against your tongue as another wave of pleasure crashes over you at the sensation.
Your mind is too hazy to know what he would do next, but Chan eventually leans back up, keeping himself propped on his elbow as he lifts the knife off your tongue, and the way the cold pressure disappears makes you all too aware that all that remains is a numb feeling and a whole lot of spit.
Without thinking, you close your mouth and swallow hard, but freeze when he suddenly reaches out and wipes his fingers over your wet lips. He traces your mouth with his thumb, and before you can blink, Chan curses, pulling his mask over his head.
You barely have enough time to drink in his features before he dips down and kisses you, almost swallowing you whole. His tongue slips into your mouth, and all you can taste, feel and touch is Chan, and his name is ringing in your head like it’s the only word you know how to say.
He groans, his hands coming up to tug on your hair once, before lifting off you. His eyes are glazed over, and his lips are swollen and his chest is rising and falling almost as heavily as yours. “More?”
Chan dips down again as you nod once, and as your lips meet, his hands start to trail down your body, giving your breasts a few more squeezes before he grips your hips and brushes a hand over your clit, the same time as his teeth nip your bottom lip, and your low heady is swallowed by his mouth.
Chan leans back, and you let your legs drop from around his lips. His eyes dip to your lips and you push yourself up on your elbows as Chan comes forward to nip your lips one more time before he watches his cock slip free from your cunt, and a slow smile spreads across his lips. “Clench and unclench for me, baby.”
You do as he says, and you can feel a large warm dollop of his cum leaking out from between your puffy lips. He groans loudly and his hand twitches, as if he is struggling to stop himself from touching you again.
“Chan.” Your voice is hoarse, but Chan’s eyes flash with heat, and this time, there is no mistaking what his smile means. 
It was pride.
Chan immediately tugs up his boxers, and you say a mournful goodbye to his cock just as his hands come to grab your waist gently. “Ladybug.”
The soft endearment is too much, considering what just happened and your heart cracks open, and you bite down on your bottom lip, feeling all your emotions for him threatening to spill out of your mouth. You had to behave. He had just given you a gift and an experience you hadn’t thought was possible.
He brushes your hair out of your face, smiling softly. “You were perfect.” He leans in to kiss the tip of your nose, and there is no way you could have stopped the tears from coming out.
“Chan….I–” Before the words can get out of your throat, Chan cuts you off with a kiss to your jaw, sliding his hands up the nape of your neck. He tugs you into him, before falling back on the bed with you tucked into his side.
“You don’t have to say anything yet, Ladybug. Just breathe with me.” You breathe in his scent, feeling his warmth spread over your body. He yanks up the blanket, and you snuggle into him, hearing his heartbeat under your ear.
Chan didn’t say anything, but you knew as well as he did that your relationship just got more fucked up. There was nothing you could both do to stop it.
(endnotes)
AHHHHH! i am so happy to push this out. this one has been in my head a lot, and i am so so excited to start this series. The pairings will be around the reader and skz in university, and while each can be read alone, they will be interconnected.
the next person is going to be minho x han x reader, and it’s going to be about han using the reader to make minho jealous and they end up being a throuple. aka one of my favourite tropes ever. (of course, chan and reader will have their part two, but i have a lot of plans for them, so it is going to have to wait.)
thank you for reading, and any feedback, like and comments you leave behind mean the whole world to me. (please, imagine me with a bowl in my hands begging for your validation)
294 notes ¡ View notes
delulumel ¡ 1 month ago
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your honour | psh
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synopsis: in which you push the judge too far, you learn that actions have consequences—and he always delivers the sentence himself.
genre: judge au
pairing: judge!sunghoon x troubled!reader
warnings: meandom!sunghoon, cold!sunghoon, horndog!reader, manhandling, cornering, degrading (holy fuck sm degrading), crazy dirty talk, gagging with fingers, hair pulling, choking, biting, spanking ass + pussy, rough p in v (unprotected), clit rubbing, creampie, bondage, fingering, overstimulation, orgasm denial and no aftercare. think that’s it…
wc: 6.3k
a/n: this is so filthy!!! yall im on a plot burnout i have so many ideas i just can’t bring myself to write a proper full length fic :[ anyways… notes, reblogs and comments are always appreciated. enjoy <3
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your arms are crossed over your chest like armor. it's not foolproof—your wrists are still cuffed, and the bruises from last week's chase are still turning the edges of your skin a dull yellow with splotches of blue. you hold yourself steady anyway, like you've already survived worse.
you have.
the courtroom is too quiet for your taste. sterile walls, tired faces, and that rusted old flag in the corner drooping like it's had one too many years of watching justice be handed out unevenly.
there's a bailiff at your side, fingers twitching near their belt, as if they think you might leap over the railing and bolt. you don't blame them. you've done worse for less serious crimes.
but right now, you're not thinking about running—not even close.
you're staring straight at him.
park sunghoon.
honorable judge. esteemed in the district. untouchable. 'not for long,' you think to yourself, a small smirk gracing your lips as you hold your gaze.
his nameplate gleams under the artificial lighting, but it's not as cold as the look in his eyes when he glances down at you. black rob, pale hands, pristine posture like he's never once had a bad day, or at least never shown it.
he speaks your name like it tastes bitter in his mouth, his plump lips pursing in distaste.
"theft. trespassing. property damage," sunghoon reads, flipping through the paperwork like it's boring him. "and now contempt of court. again."
your smirk is the only weapon you have left, "that one wasn't on purpose."
his gaze doesn't flinch, "you were caught lighting a cigarette in the bathroom during recess."
"wasn't lit," you say coolly, his gaze now piercing into you. "i didn't even get to spark it," you almost whine out.
"because the officer stopped you."
"because the lighter was out of fluid," you shoot back, offended that he'd think that you'd let some officer stop you from lighting a spark.
for a moment, you think you see something twitch in the corner of his mouth—amusement? disbelief? but it's gone before it settles. he leans back in his seat, elbows on the armrests, voice clipped, "you don't seem to take this seriously."
you stare him down, your eyebrows raised, "you don't seem to live in the same world as the rest of us."
sunghoon says nothing at first, just studies you, eyes narrowing the longer the silence drags. he looks at you like you're a puzzle he didn't expect to come across and now he's trying to decide whether to solve you or break you apart and pack you away.
finally, he speaks, "given the repeated offences and your inability to cooperate with court proceedings, you are hereby found guilty."
your chest tightens—not because you're surprised. you knew this was coming, it was always going to come to this.
"you're to pay a fine of $5,000"
you snort, loud and messy which causes sunghoon to look at you with what you could only assume was disgust, "you might as well say 5 million. i don't have shit, your honour." your voice drips with mockery on that last part, but it's not like you can help it. titles mean nothing to people like you. not when the system's always rigged the same way.
sunghoon doesn't react the way you expect. no fury, no raised voice. instead, he rests his chin against his hand and stares down at you, thoughtful, composed—calculating.
"then perhaps we can make alternate arrangements."
you narrow your eyes. "like what? community service? sweeping the courthouse floors?" you had heard it all before, and you'd be damned if you did any of it.
he ignores your sarcasm. "i'm offering you a deal." you don't trust deals, especially not from men like him. but you're listening.
"you're clearly resourceful. difficult, but clever." his eyes scan your face like he's making a mental file, "if you truly cannot pay, then you'll work it off. under my supervision."
you blink up at him, dumbfounded, "what?"
sunghoon doesn't smile, doesn't even shift, "you'll report here. every morning, 6 am sharp. you'll handle clerical tasks, sorting files, transcriptions. menial work, mostly. i'll be watching."
you lean forward, just a little. "and if i say no?"
his voice is ice cold, "then you'll serve time."
you flinch at that, prison isn't unfamiliar—but it's worse this time. you're older now, tired and you know the kind of people they throw you in with.
your jaw clenches, "this some kind of power trip for you?"
his eyes glint, unreadable. "no. but it might be one for you. if you can handle being civil."
you hate him for that. for the way his words crawl under your skin, settle in your ribs like they belong there. you hate him for being calm, for not flinching when you push back. for the way he makes you feel cornered even when you're standing tall.
"fine," you spit. "i'll take your little deal."
sunghoon nods, finally. bangs the gavel once sending shocks through your body.
"court adjourned."
but as you're escorted out, you catch the way he watches you. slow, deliberate. like he's already plotting what to do with a fire like yours.
and you know this is far from over.
═══════
6 am comes fast, you show up at 6:17am.
your boots echo too loud on the marble floors of the courthouse as you stroll in like you own the place. hoodie unzipped, hands in your pockets, chewing gum with all the arrogance of someone who knows they're untouchable—or just wants to see how far they can push before they aren't.
sunghoon is already waiting, of course. seated behind his desk in his chambers, reading over a case file, all rigid posture and starched cuffs. he doesn't look up when you enter, but you feel the chill in the air shift the moment he registers your presence.
you lean against the doorframe, pop your gum, and smile sweetly, "morning, your honour."
he finally looks up, no smile—no greeting. just a flat, "you're late."
you shrug, "public transportation's a bitch. and my ankle monitor doesn't exactly come with wings."
sunghoon closes the file slowly, deliberately, "your sentence began at 6 am sharp. not whenever you decide to roll out of bed."
you wander further into his office, dragging your fingers across the edge of his polished desk. "well, maybe you should've sentenced me to something more exciting. i'd be more motivated to be punctual." you snicker softly, your fingers brushing against some books before landing on a small statue.
he doesn't rise, doesn't react. just watches you with that unreadable stare, like he's already dissecting your every move.
"sit."
you raise an eyebrow before looking around the room, no chair in sight, "where?"
he gestures with his pen to a wooden chair shoved against the back wall. no cushion. no wheels. no dignity.
you scoff, "wow. luxury accommodations."
"sit," he says again, this time lower—sharper.
you do—but not before you tip the chair slightly and drag it across the floor, the screech of wood against tile sounding loud and obnoxious. you plop down and swing your legs up onto the edge of his desk like it's your living room.
"so," you say, folding your arms behind your head. "what soul-crushing task do i get to do first? file your fan mail? shine your gavel?"
sunghoon doesn't flinch. doesn't blink. just reaches over and, without warning, shoves your boots off his desk with one smooth motion. hard enough to jolt the whole chair, causing you to hold onto the desk for support.
you laugh in surprise before masking it quickly with a silly remark, "ooh. touchy."
he leans forward now, voice calm but laced with threat, "i don't care how you've gotten away with things in the past. in this room, under my supervision, you follow."
"or what?" you bite, eyes narrowing. "you gonna slap another fine on me? lock me up again?"
"no," he murmurs, his eyes not leaving yours. "i'll break you without ever lifting a finger."
you go quiet for the first time because for some strange reason, you believe him.
but that doesn't mean you're going to make it easy.
by 10 am, you've misfiled at least four court documents on purpose, accidentally-on-purpose spilled coffee on one, and whistled a highly inappropriate tune every time someone passes the open door.
sunghoon doesn't snap. he doesn't yell, but the tightness in his jaw gets worse. his sleeves are rolled to his elbows now, veins taut, hand gripped around his pen like he's imagining stabbing something with it. you allow your gaze to wander over him, relishing in his cold presence as you eye-fuck him to oblivion. 
you stretch lazily in your seat across the room, flipping through a file upside down just to be difficult.
"you always this fun at parties?" you ask, eyes lazily scanning the document. 
"you always this exhausting when you're sober?"
you grin, "you should've sentenced me to something harder. i get off on discipline."
he finally looks up. eyes dark and voice low.
"is that what this is? acting out so someone will finally put you in your place?"
you blink, not expecting that.
sunghoon stands now, slow and deliberate, and crosses the room to tower over where you're still slouched in your chair. he leans down just enough to make your breath hitch, his minty fresh cologne invading your senses—sending your body into overdrive. 
"you want someone to punish you, is that it?" he says, voice barely above a whisper. "because you're skating dangerously close to contempt again."
you swallow harshly but you hold the smirk, even if it's faltering, "you threatening me, your honour?"
his lips twitch, not a smile—something colder.
"no," he says. "just waiting for you to slip. and when you do—when all that bratty bravado cracks, you'll beg for someone like me to be the one holding the leash."
your throat goes dry.
he straightens and turns away, already done with you for the moment, and you're left there blinking like the ground shifted under your feet.
this was supposed to be fun. a game.
but now? now you think he's playing back.
and he plays dirty.￟
═══════
you should've gone home.
you were dismissed hours ago. the office lights are off, most of the staff gone, echoing laughter and jangling keys disappearing down the hallway.
but you stayed.
because you wanted to see what would happen if you crossed the line, alone—with him.
sunghoon's still in his chambers with his door cracked, light spilling out in a narrow slice across the floor. you lean in the doorway without knocking, arms folded, teeth sunk into the inside of your cheek just to keep from smiling too wide.
he doesn't look up.
"still working?" you ask, voice low and sugary.
he doesn't respond at first. then, without looking away from his file, "if you're still here, it's because you want something. so say it, and make it fast." you saunter in, drag your nails across his bookshelf, pull a file halfway out and shove it back in crooked just to be annoying, "just wanted to chat. you seem lonely."
his jaw flexes, but he doesn't rise—doesn't yell. instead, he sets his pen down, lifting his eyes to you slowly, deliberately—and lets out a low breath through his nose.
"you're a desperate little thing, aren't you?"
you blink, "excuse me?"
he stands.
you don't move. just watch him stalk forward, quiet, composed, eyes cutting into you like scalpels.
he stops inches from you, doesn't touch. doesn't lean in.
but his voice? razor-edged filth.
"you dress like a brat, talk like a slut, act out like a girl who's been begging for someone to spit in her mouth and call her worthless." your breath catches and your legs almost give out.
"you're not here to talk," he continues, voice lower, crueler. "you're here because no one's ever put you in your place and you're too much of a mess to admit you want it."
you flinch, lips parting, "you don't even know me—"
"i know everything," he cuts in sharply. "i've read your records. i've seen the trail of damage you leave behind just to get someone to notice you. daddy issues, authority issues, zero impulse control. you want men to hate you just so they'll finally touch you."
you gasp, cheeks flushing hot—but not with shame.
with need.
because he's right. because no one's ever talked to you like this.
"look at you," he sneers. "breathing heavy already, shifting your legs like you're not soaking through your little panties right now. you came in here thinking you could bait me with your bratty mouth, hoping i'd snap and pin you against the wall like some filthy fantasy you've cooked up in that head of yours."
you say nothing. you can't.
"but i'm not like the boys you fuck behind bars or in alleyways," he whispers, eyes boring into yours. "i don't play with trash."
you whimper.
his smile is slow and cruel, "oh? that got you wet, didn't it?" your thighs squeeze together instinctively, and he laughs—cold, low, unamused.
"pathetic. dripping just from being spoken to like the little cum-dump you are."
you try to speak, but your mouth won't work. you're breathing too fast, too shallow, clit throbbing through your jeans, nipples hard under your hoodie, and he hasn't even touched you.
he leans in, barely. his cool breath fanned against your ear causing you to shiver, "you'll come back tomorrow, won't you?" he murmurs against your ear. "all sweet and mouthy again, hoping this is the day I finally bend you over my desk and fuck your brains out like the filthy little whore you pretend not to be."
you whine—a soft, needy sound that makes his eyes darken just a little.
then he pulls back, his hands stay folded behind him. he steps past you, calm as ever, voice low and bored. "go home. you're dripping on my floor."
═══════
you start showing up on time.
5:59 am, hair damp from a rushed shower, hoodie half-zipped, eyes sharp with purpose. you slide into the office like you own the place—and every day, you find him already there, perfect as ever. sleeves rolled up, tie tight, reading over a file like he didn't just spend the last twelve hours thinking about the way you moaned for him without him even touching you.
you don't speak much now, you don't have to.
the first time it happens, it's barely a whisper of a moment—you walk past him to grab a stack of paperwork, and your hip brushes his hand resting on the edge of the desk. soft. slow. deliberate. and you don't flinch, don't apologize.
you smile.
his pen halts mid-sentence.
you don't look back.
the second time, you lean in close to hand him a stapled report—closer than you need to, your fingers brushing over his when he takes it from you. you let your thumb drag just barely over his knuckle before pulling away.
he doesn't speak, but his jaw's clenched so tight you hear it pop.
the third time, it's worse. you're leaning over his desk, too far, pretending to scan the page while your hips subtly roll back, brushing against where he's standing behind you. it's slow—not full contact but just enough pressure to feel the line of his thigh brush your ass.
you feel him freeze. you breathe out, soft and sweet, "oops."
he doesn't move. doesn't even blink. you can feel his restraint like a second heat, burning against your skin.
you straighten up with a grin and saunter off and for the rest of the day, you can feel his eyes on your back like a loaded weapon.
═══════
you live for the control—the knowledge that you're the one unraveling him now. no chains, no cuffs, no cell. just you and your filthy little grin in his clean little world.
every time your hand lingers too long on his wrist when passing him a pen. every time your fingers brush his thigh when you "accidentally" drop a file. every time you stretch beside him, moaning faintly when you reach your arms overhead like you're trying to kill him with your spine alone.
he doesn't say a word.
not one curse, not one command. but every breath he takes feels heavier. every time he adjusts his cuffs, it's slower. rougher. the one time he looks at you, really looks, while you're standing by the window with the light catching your smug little smirk and you swear there's murder in his eyes.
or maybe lust, or both.
you bite your lip and wink.
he goes back to reading but his knuckles are white around the edge of the page.
you don't stop, of course you don't. you know he's cracking. you just want to see how far before he breaks.
═══════
you don't knock today.
you walk in like always—mouth full of gum, hair half done, smirk locked and loaded.
but the outfit? oh, this is new.
short skirt, barely mid-thigh. skin-tight, no stockings. no shame. 
your blouse clings to your chest with every breath, just one wrong move from spilling open—and you bend to pick up a file by the door the second you walk in, as if you didn't plan the whole motion.
you make sure your ass is pointed directly at his chair, you hear nothing for a beat. then the sound of a pen snapping in his hand.
you bite your lip to keep from smiling. "good morning, your honour," you say sweetly, rising slow, letting your tits bounce just enough. "got something for you to sign."
he doesn't answer. doesn't look up. he just sets the ruined pen down, stands in silence, and walks to the far cabinet—jaw sharp, back stiff.
he doesn't speak for an hour, but you don't stop.
you lean across the desk to file something, letting your breasts nearly spill out. you sit on the edge of the table too close, too comfortable, skirt hiked up high on your thighs. you cross and uncross your legs too slow. you sigh every time you shift, like the fabric's clinging to places it shouldn't.
and the worst part? you don't even look at him anymore.
you just know. you know he's watching. you feel his silence like a leash. and still, you test it.
again. and again.
until—
"shut the door." 
you freeze, glancing over to see that sunghoon's still behind the desk, hands folded, gaze pinned directly to your face for the first time all day.
there's no emotion in his tone, just something dark.
you step back slowly, click the door shut.
"lock it."
you do, your pulse skips.
he nods once toward the chair in front of his desk, "sit."
you obey—this time, no sass, no roll of the eyes. he watches you for a long, heavy moment. then: "stand up."
you blink, but you rise. he leans back in his chair, eyes raking over you with undisguised disgust. "this what you wear to court? no wonder you can't stay out of handcuffs."
you shiver when his voice drops an octave, "i've let you act out. walk around my office like it's a runway. rub your filthy little body against me like a dog in heat. but today?" his tongue clicks, "today, you came here begging."
you bite your lip and he notices. "don't even deny it," he sneers. "you dressed like a fucking pornstar and shoved your tits in my face three times before lunch."
you blink fast, thighs press together. "you want attention so bad," he whispers, voice cold and cruel. "you'd crawl under this desk and suck cock just to feel useful for once."
you whimper causing his eyes to narrow "pathetic."
you take a shaky step forward, voice too soft. "so do something about it."
"no." the word is a bullet. sharp. final. you flinch, "what?"
"i'm not giving you what you want," he says, standing now—towering over you, eyes blazing. "not until you ask." you swallow, your breath stutters, "...i just did—" "not like that," he leans in close, still not touching, his breath ghosting your cheek. "i want to hear you beg. properly. filthy. on your knees if you have to."
your mouth opens but no sound comes out.
"c'mon," he hisses. "say it. say you're a dirty little whore who wore this skirt just to get her judge to ruin her."
your knees go weak.
"say you've been dripping for me for weeks. say you need to be put in your place. beg me to spit in your mouth and call you mine." you nearly drop right there while he watches you—smug, furious, and impossibly composed.
"but you won't," he whispers. "because you're a coward. just a brat with no bite."
you snap, you sink to your knees with your palms on your thighs. skirt riding high, head tilted up with your tongue caught between your teeth.
"please," you whisper, cheeks hot. "i wore it for you. i wanted you to see what you've been missing. i wanted you to lose control. i wanted to feel owned. like a fucking toy." his nostrils flare and you crawl forward. "i've been dripping for you since the first time you called me worthless," you breathe out shamelessly. "you don't have to fuck me. just—just say i'm yours."
his hand twitches at his side but still he doesn't touch you, he just smiles—slow and dangerous. "you're finally learning," he murmurs. "maybe tomorrow i'll reward you."
and he walks out, leaves you on the floor—aching, wrecked and obedient.
═══════
you show up like nothing happened, tight dress, high heels and no bra. you don't even bring a file, you just lean against the edge of his desk like you're here to ruin him.
sunghoon doesn't look up, not right away. but when he does—it's over.
his eyes flick up to your chest, then back to your mouth, and the moment your lips part to say something smart, he moves.
fast.
the chair scrapes back with a violent screech. you barely have time to gasp before he grabs your wrist and slams you against the desk, stomach flat against the wood, cheek pressed down by the weight of his hand. you yelp, breath knocked out of you—but it's not pain. it's heat, flooding between your legs in a dizzying wave.
"this what you wanted?" sunghoon growls, voice raw at your ear. "me snapping like some animal? you filthy, needy, shameless little—fuck." he yanks your arms behind your back, pins both wrists with one big hand and grinds you into the desk. "look at you squirming and wet. couldn't go one more day without getting manhandled, huh?"
you whine out when his free hand slides up your spine, griping the back of your neck, forcing your head to the side so your cheek stays plastered to the wood. your eyes snap open in shock when he pushes his thick digits into your mouth, forcing your mouth full.
"you've been begging for this," he snarls. "dressing like a whore. moaning when i speak. bending over like you want to get fucked in front of the whole court." you can barely breathe—your mouth opens, but nothing comes out.
he laughs—low and cruel, "what's wrong? mouth finally too full of regret?" he spreads your legs with his knee, lets his thigh press up between them while his grip on your wrists tightens.
you're soaked. dripping straight through your panties, probably smearing slick across his desk — and he feels it. his thigh twitches and he groans. "pathetic," he growls. "you're soaking my leg and i haven't even touched your cunt."
you whimper into the desk, legs trembling, thighs trying to grind down on his thigh—but he pulls it back with a smirk. "you think you run this game," he whispers in your ear. "you think a few bratty looks and slutty outfits make you powerful."
he yanks your head back by the hair and forces you to look at him—eyes wild, chest rising, jaw clenched.
"you don't run shit here." his fingers trail down your jaw, not gentle—gripping your face like he wants to crush it, "you're mine."
you blink fast. your lips part as he finally removes his fingers from your mouth.
"say it."
your voice shakes. "i'm—i'm yours."
"again."
"i'm yours."
"louder."
"i'm fucking yours," you scream—thighs shaking, cunt pulsing, wrists still pinned.
he stares down at you—flushed, dripping, ruined against his desk. then he leans in, lips just brushing your ear, "you're not cumming until i say so."
you whimper in response. "and when you do," he breathes, "you're gonna thank me for breaking you."
he steps back and lets you collapse to your knees.
undone.
and he leaves you there, again.
═══════
you should've ran.
the look on his face the second you step into his office—eyes cold, mouth tight, sleeves rolled up like he's about to sentence you to death, should've sent you crawling. 
but you don't run, you smirk—and that's all it takes. he grabs you before the door even clicks shut—slams you against it, one hand fisting in your hair, the other squeezing your throat until your breath stutters.
"tired of you strutting around like you're untouchable," he hisses. "you want to be fucked so bad? fine. i'll fuck you like the filthy little criminal you are."
you whimper when his grip tightens—then he spins you, throws you against his desk. your hips crash into the edge, papers scattering, your hands scrambling for balance. he's behind you again, dragging your skirt up so high it tears, yanking your panties down and tossing them like trash.
you feel his palm ghost over your ass and you can't help but push yourself back against him in excitement. "already soaked," he mutters, disgusted. "fucking slut."
crack.
you yelp—the first spank makes you jolt. second makes you moan. third has your knees buckling. he grabs a fistful of your hair and yanks your head back, hissing in your ear, "say thank you."
"th-thank you," you pant.
crack.
"louder."
"thank you!"
he pulls your head back harder, exposing your throat—then his mouth is on you, biting, not kissing, sinking his teeth into the sensitive skin until you cry out. sunghoon groans when he feels you twitch violently in his hold, his teeth scraping against your neck as he continues to leave violent splotches on your skin. 
"that's right," he breathes. "cry for me. scream if you need to. no one's coming for you." his hand slips between your legs, finally, and slaps your sopping cunt. you wail in response, your legs giving up on you as you rely on the desk in front of you and sunghoon as support. 
"needy," he sneers. "dripping all over my desk like a goddamn animal."
his fingers slide through the mess—not inside, just over your clit, slow, taunting strokes that make you tremble, "you wanna cum?" 
"yes," you gasp. "yes please—"
he pulls away, completely.
you sob—back arching, thighs clenching, breath broken.
"beg better."
"please, please—sunghoon, i need it, i need you, please—!"
he laughs. cold, "pathetic."
then he grabs your waist, slams you forward until your chest hits the desk with your hands flat, legs spread, back arched—and shoves his thick cock inside you in one brutal, single thrust. in the midst you hadn't even noticed sunghoon slip out his aching cock out of his dress pants, to busy fighting for your release. 
you scream at the intrusion. he doesn't give you a second to adjust, he fucks you like he owns you—hips snapping, cock dragging deep, thick and brutal and perfect. one hand wrapped around your throat, the other gripping your ass so hard you'll bruise. your walls suck him in like a vacuum, refusing to let him go causing him to hiss. 
you try to meet his thrusts — you try to grind back — but he slaps your ass again, harder, and hisses, "don't move unless i tell you to."
you go still, breathless and shaking. his fingers slip down again—circling your clit, slow, taunting and just as your body starts to tighten, just as your orgasm builds—
he pulls away. again.
you sob.
"not yet," he growls. "you think you've earned it? after all that teasing?"
his hand slides up, fingers wrapping around your throat in a punishing grip.  "you're gonna take it," he breathes, "every inch. every slap. every denial. and you're gonna fucking thank me."
"thank you," you cry. "please—please, i'll be good—"
he leans over you, cock still buried, teeth sinking into your shoulder as he continues his pace and fucks you rougher, harder and crueler. you lose count of how many times he brings you to the edge—how many times he lets you feel it just to rip it away.
you're drooling. trembling. begging.
and finally—finally—when you're gasping, soaked, ruined—
"cum."
the word cracks through you like lightning. your body explodes in trembles. 
you convulse around him, sobbing, screaming, cunt clenching tight as he chokes you through it —fingers digging in, cock pulsing deep inside you until he curses and spills inside, hips slamming once, twice more as he fucks it all into you.
then silence, just panting. shaking. his hands still on your hips as his cum dripping down your thighs. 
you lay there lifeless but sunghoon has other plans, his hands grip you tightly as he contorts and pushes your body around—moving you from his desk to his chair. 
 you don't know how you ended up like this, but you're tied up in his chair and you're far to fucked out to care. 
not just restrained—displayed. arms behind your back, wrists cuffed tight to the armrests. legs spread open and bent at the knee, ankles locked in place with thick leather straps he probably had custom made.
you can feel his cum leaking out of you and you can't do a thing about it. sunghoon leans back against his desk like he has all the time in the world—black dress shirt undone at the collar, sleeves rolled up, eyes drinking you in.
"look at you," his voice is low and cruel. you swallow hard, your cheeks are burning. your chest is rising and falling too fast.
he pushes off the desk and walks toward you, slow.
his fingers trail up your thigh, featherlight, and you twitch, already sensitive, already leaking.
"legs shaking," he murmurs in admiration. "pussy swollen. thighs sticky."
he crouches in front of you, one hand sliding under your ass, lifting you just enough to tilt your hips.
"still dripping," he sneers. "you're disgusting."
your breath catches as he drags two fingers through your folds—slick and soaked and overstimulated—and lifts them to your lips.
"open." you obey mindlessly. 
he pushes them in slow, watches you suck them clean, jaw twitching with how filthy the taste is. "good girl," he mocks. then his fingers drop back down and he spits on your pussy and watches it drips down between your folds, warm and thick, mixing with his cum and your slick. 
you squirm—but the cuffs hold you down, "don't move." his palm lands on your inner thigh, hard enough to sting. then he slides two fingers inside slow, unforgiving—and curls them just right. 
your whole body jerks. "that's it," he breathes. "let me feel it. let me feel this tight little hole try to suck me in." he fucks you with his fingers like he owns you, thumb rolling over your clit. soaking the leather seat beneath you.
your eyes roll back and your moans turn desperate. "sunghoon," you whimper. "please, i'm—i'm gonna—"
he stops and pulls out completely.
you scream, your thighs tremble and your cunt clenches pathetically around nothing. you're left dripping, throbbing, aching for him—and he just leans in, tongue sliding up the inside of your thigh like he's taunting prey.
then he bites, hard.
you cry out and he slaps your pussy in response, watching you twitch. 
he stands back up, looming over you. his hand curls around your throat, squeezing just enough to make your eyes flutter.
"you don't cum," he growls, "until i say you do." you nod, fast.
his free hand drags down the front of his pants—slow. threatening. you're his now. completely. tied to his chair, soaked with his cum, ruined from the inside out.
"we're not leaving this room," he says, leaning in close, "until you've screamed my name so many times you forget your own."
your arms are still pinned, your thighs are still open and your cunt is still leaking.
and sunghoon? he's sitting across from you like he's watching a show. shirt off now. cock out with one hand lazily stroking himself while the other rubs small firm circles on your clit.
you scream. your whole body jerks against the cuffs, hips snapping up, trying to run from the pressure—but there's nowhere to go. he hums, watching the way your thighs tremble, "this is what happens when you act out," he says calmly. "i could've been kind. could've been soft."
he presses his thumb hard against your sensitive nub. you sob out in response, far to overstimulated. 
"but no," he breathes, eyes locked on your face. "you had to shove your tits in my face and moan my name like a fucking whore." you throw your head back, mouth falling open as he slides right against the bundle of nerves that are already so sore it hurts.
you're soaked, ruined, twitching. your legs keep trying to close, but the cuffs won't let you.
you cum again.
you scream—choking on the breath that never makes it out—your entire body jerking, wrists straining, tears spilling.
sunghoon finally moves, he kicks the chair until it swivels toward him, then straddles it—his knees on either side of yours, thighs wide, cock thick and leaking.
you cry in relief until he grabs his cock and slaps it against your overstimulated clit.
you howl in pain, he leans in close, lips at your ear, "don't pass out on me," he murmurs. "you're not done yet."
and then he pushes inside with no warning, no mercy.
just his cock slamming in deep, so deep—you can't even scream, just choke on the cry as your back arches, arms still trapped, legs locked wide open, cunt fluttering helplessly around the stretch.
"tight," he hisses. "fucking tight."
he doesn't ease in, he pounds you. the chair jerks with every thrust—your wrists slam against the armrests and your legs shake violently from the overstimulation, he grabs your throat to keep you still.
"cry for me," he pants. "let them hear you beg." you sob. scream. cum again and he fucks through it, groaning deep in his throat as your cunt squeezes him tight and refuses to let go. 
"i should leave you like this," he growls. "cuffed to my chair. ruined. dripping. fucked open and forgotten."
you can't speak, you can barely breathe.
but then he leans in with his mouth pressed to your ear and growls, "but you'd like that, wouldn't you?"
you nod helpless and broken.
"filthy little thing." his hand slides to your face, gripping it—holding your jaw still as he fucks you rougher, meaner, hips snapping, chair rocking, desk rattling behind you.
you cum one last time your loudest scream yet—and he finally groans, curses, slams in deep and spills inside, so hard you feel it throb against your cervix.
silence, just breathing.
just cum, just slick and heat and soaked leather.
you're limp with his cum leaking out of you again. your wrists raw, thighs bruised and your head luls back.
your whole body is twitching. you're soaked. stretched. dripping down the legs of the chair, his cum leaking out of your throbbing cunt in slow, slick trails. wrists raw. 
and sunghoon?he's already tucking himself back into his slacks.
not a glance spared, not a word spoken. just the quiet click of his belt and the sound of your ragged breathing. you whimper—a soft, broken little sound and try to shift, try to close your legs, but the cuffs keep them open. exposed. leaking.
"pathetic," he mutters, adjusting his cuffs. your lips part and you want to speak. to ask if he's going to untie you, if he's going to help you down—if this means anything at all.
but he cuts you off before you can even form the words, "that," he says, voice flat, "should teach you how to behave."
your stomach drops as he walks to the door. he doesn't touch you, doesn't untie you, doesn't clean you up or kiss your cheek or say anything kind. just unlocks the door, turns to look at you one last time—ruined, bound, soaked with his cum and shaking from everything he just did to you.
his expression is unreadable, cold. "next time you walk into my courtroom acting like a whore," he says, "you'll leave in worse shape than this." he pauses, walking back to you and you have a glimmer of hope that he'd untie you. 
but that all comes crashing down when he reaches you and he leans in, mouth at your ear, voice dark and smug.
"court's adjourned, baby."
then he walks out, leaving you tied there, used, aching.
alone.
and still desperate for more.
— enjoy this fic? check out my other ones right here!
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delulumel ¡ 1 month ago
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You’re broke, exhausted, and desperate enough to take a cleaning job no one else will touch. The client lives alone in a silent penthouse, hidden from the world by rumor and choice. You weren’t supposed to know his name—just clean and leave. But when your journal goes missing and comes back with his handwriting in the margins, everything changes.
• minors do not interact
• pairing: schizophrenic concert pianist!heeseung x afab reader
• wc: 28k
• content tags: angst, hurt/comfort, mental health themes, depictions of schizophrenia, poverty, class disparity, emotional repression, slow burn, journal entries, forbidden closeness, soft smut, loneliness, poetic prose, mentions of blood, trauma, caretaker dynamics, emotionally intense, non-idol au, heeseung x reader, reader-insert.
WARNINGS: mental illness (schizophrenia), mentions of blood, emotional breakdowns, poverty, food insecurity, toxic living environment, isolation, possible dissociation, references to past trauma, depersonalization, implied neglect, emotionally heavy content, not a fluff centric story. okay maybe there’s a little fluff.
• a/n: this was meant to be a 15k word fic (don’t ask me what happened) i would still die for recluse heeseung.
• nsfw tags under the cut
SMUT, oral sex (f receiving), squirting, unprotected sex, bloodplay implications, sex during dissociation, power imbalance, emotional dependency, mental illness (schizophrenia), mentions of self-harm, trauma, possessive behavior, emotionally intense dynamic, obsession themes. (lmk if i missed any) not proofread!
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You're running. Again. The strap of your tote bag digs into your shoulder as your shoes slap the sidewalk, water splashing up your ankles with each desperate step. Rain mist clings to your skin like sweat—except sweat would be warm. This is just cold and inconvenient. Your Literature lecture ran ten minutes over because, of course, your professor finally decided to acknowledge your existence the one time you needed to leave early. He asked for your thoughts on postmodern fragmentation in the age of digital alienation while you sat there wondering if postmodern fragmentation was what your GPA would look like this semester.
By the time you made it outside, the bus was already pulling up. You waved frantically, almost twisting your ankle as you darted across the crosswalk—nearly colliding with a cyclist. He swerved. You screamed. He cursed. It was poetic, in a tragicomedy kind of way. Now, you're clinging to the pole in the bus's center aisle, damp hair clinging to your cheeks as it rocks around corners, your phone buzzing with the time—12:46 PM.
Mrs. Do expects you at 12:30. Sharp, always sharp but today you're going to disappoint her, again and it makes you nervous cause this isn't your first fuck up. Getting off at the bus stop in Mrs. Do's neighborhood is like stepping into another world. Wide sidewalks, trimmed hedges. Every driveway is the kind of polished grey stone that seems to repel dirt on principle. The kind of neighborhood that smells like generational wealth and imported jasmine diffusers.
The sky's already sour when you round the corner onto the cobblestone lane. Gray and sullen, like it knows something you don't. Your thighs ache from sprinting across campus, your spine's slick with sweat under your too-thin hoodie, and your fingers are still raw from gripping the metal pole on the bus. You hadn't even realized how tightly you were holding on—like the bus was the only thing standing between you and collapse. You're fifteen minutes late, sixteen, actually.
The house looms before you like a museum exhibit—grand, sterile, and quiet enough to make you feel like you've already done something wrong just by being there. All tall glass windows and trimmed hedges, with a front door so glossy you can see your own desperation reflected in it. You ring the bell, sucking in a breath and she opens it almost immediately. Mrs. Do doesn't need to speak to make her opinion known. Her eyes flick down your frame—hoodie, faded jeans, dirt-smudged sneakers—and her mouth flattens like she's biting back something acidic. Her nose twitches once.
"You're late."
"I'm so sorry," you say, voice thin. "My class ran over and I missed my bus, and—" She rolls her eyes, cutting you off, "You people always have an excuse". You people. "I've already called your manager," she says coolly, stepping back just enough to make room for your shame to enter. "This is unacceptable. I hired help, not excuses."
Help. You step inside anyway because she hasn't technically slammed the door in your face yet. The floor gleams beneath your feet and you're careful not to drip on the marble. "I can still clean," you try, gripping the handle of your tote tighter. "I—I'll stay longer if you need. P—Please don't fire me." She turns slowly, folding her arms like she's posing for a luxury handbag ad. "You'll leave," she says. "And next time, be honest with yourself about what you're capable of."
That's it. No raised voice, no chance to plead. Just ice in human form and the creak of the front door swinging back open like a guillotine. You stand there a second too long—long enough for it to become pathetic—then you turn and walk back out with your head down and your heart thudding where your confidence used to be. It starts to drizzle as soon as you step off her perfect property. Of course it does.You jog down to the bus stop at the end of the street, ignoring the way your socks squelch in your shoes. Your bag knocks awkwardly against your side. You still have half a bottle of disinfectant in there, you could drink it and cleanse the humiliation right out of your system.
The bus pulls up late. You board with the same dread you imagine people feel before surgery—knowing it's necessary, knowing it's going to hurt. Inside, it's packed. You stand, gripping the pole, body swaying with every uneven turn. The lights flicker overhead. A kid is screaming two seats over. A man is coughing into his hand and not covering his mouth. You catch your reflection in the window—wet hair clinging to your cheeks, eyes dull, lips chapped from chewing them in nervous spirals. This is your life, this bus ride, this moment, is unfortunately your life. The route winds through the city, away from the clean sidewalks and polished gates, deeper into the cracked edges of town where the concrete is more gum than stone and the streetlights work in pairs—if at all. You get off at the corner near the faded liquor store, shoulders hunched under the growing weight of your day.
Your apartment building is a boxy, red-brick rectangle with iron balconies rusting at the corners. The woman who lives two floors up is yelling at her boyfriend again. You can hear every word, you wonder why they're still together seeing as they're fighting every other day. You climb the stairs slowly, dragging your legs like anchors. The third floor always smells like someone burned toast and sprayed perfume to hide it. Your door sticks and it takes three tries to get it open. The TV is already blaring, some british reality dating show, laughter, the pop of a beer can. Minjae is sprawled across the couch, shirtless, remote in one hand and a bowl in the other.
Your bowl. "Yo," he greets, mouth full. "You look like death."
"Thanks." You kick off your shoes and look around in the apartment that's in pure chaos—shoes everywhere, makeup on the kitchen counter, someone's bra dangling from the dining chair. Probably Jiyoon's. The dishes in the sink are starting grow by numbers. She appears in the hallway, barefoot and probably wine-drunk, wearing one of her boyfriend's shirts.
"Hey," she slurs. "How was the bitch?" You stare at her. "I got fired." "Again?" she groans, flopping dramatically onto the peeling loveseat. "Ugh. I told you to lie and say your grandma died. It works every time." You don't respond, heading to the kitchen to open the fridge, the light flickers when you open it. There's nothing inside except a carton of milk that expired last week and someone's half-eaten burger. You close it and lean against the counter, pressing your forehead to the cabinet above.
This can't be your life. This can't keep being your life.
Your socks are still wet when you drag yourself down the narrow hall toward the shared bathroom. You don't even bother turning on the light at first—just reach blindly into the shower caddy for your body wash, hoping a hot rinse will wash off the day, or at least the last of Mrs. Do's perfume that still clings to your sleeves like a curse. Your hand closes around the bottle.
Empty.
You blink, now flipping on the harsh fluorescent light. The bottle is sitting there—your expensive one, the only thing you splurged on in months, lavender and eucalyptus, bought during a panic attack at the drugstore like a promise to yourself that things would get better but now it's squeezed dry. You stand there, frozen. Cold water dripping off your hood. Your knuckles whitening around the neck of the bottle. "Jiyoon!" your voice cracks down the hallway like a whip.
A pause. "What?" she calls back, annoyed, like you're interrupting something important—like Love Island. You storm back into the living room, brandishing the empty bottle like evidence at a trial. Minjae doesn't even glance up from the couch, he's playing something on his phone now, earbuds in, cereal bowl at his feet. Your fucking bowl.
"Tell me this wasn't him." Jiyoon sits up, scowling at your tone. "What are you talking about?" "This." You shake the bottle. "My body wash. The one you 'borrowed' last week. It's gone. Empty. And I know you don't like the smell—so unless I'm hallucinating, your leech of a boyfriend used the last of it."
She rolls her eyes. "Jesus, it's not that deep. It's body wash." "No, it's my body wash. The only nice thing I own. And he used it, again, after eating the rest of my leftovers and leaving dirty socks in the sink and never ever paying rent!"
Minjae finally glances up, one earbud still in. "Damn. You need a Xanax or something?"
Your mouth goes dry.
Jiyoon frowns. "Okay, first of all, don't talk to her like that—"
"No, don't defend me now," you cut in, voice shaking. "You let him live here for free. You make excuses for him while I scrape together every last cent to keep a roof over our heads. I work two jobs, Jiyoon. I eat scraps. I got fired today and came home in the rain to this—and now I can't even take a damn shower without discovering he's drained the last thing I own that smells like something other than despair."
She shifts, uncomfortable. "You could've said something nicer."
"And you could've picked someone who showers in his own place instead of mine!"
Silence.
You don't cry and you won't. Not in front of him. Not even here. You don't wait for an apology that'll never come. You retreat to your room, slam the door, and lock it behind you—not because you're afraid, but because you're done.
You strip off your hoodie, throw it in the corner, and climb into bed fully damp and exhausted. The blanket clings to your legs. You curl around your pillow and let the tension tremble out of your fingertips like static electricity.
You curl up in bed fully clothed, hoodie damp and clinging to your skin, fingers still aching from scrubbing tile three days ago. The blanket smells faintly like bleach. Jiyoon is laughing in the next room, voice high and bright and grating. You close your eyes.
*•*•*
You wake up to the clink of glassware and Minjae's laugh from the kitchen, that smug, high-pitched snort that always sets your teeth on edge. There's no time to be angry—not this morning. You're already late. Again.
You roll out of bed and throw on the first vaguely clean outfit you can find, dragging a brush through your tangled hair and pinning it up like your life depends on it. Your backpack's already half-packed from the night before. You stuff in your worn-out copy of Beloved, a dog-eared notebook filled with scribbles and half-finished poems, and race out the door without breakfast.
It's colder today. The kind of cold that bites under your clothes and leaves your fingers raw. You catch the bus by sheer miracle—sprinting half a block and nearly losing a shoe in the process—and squeeze into the back seat between a teenage couple whispering too loud and a man who keeps humming to himself.
You reach campus with two minutes to spare. The lecture hall smells like chalk dust and old books. It's one of your favorite smells in the world. You slide into the third row, clutching your notebook to your chest, and feel a quiet sort of calm settle over you. This is your safe place. Literature. Language. Storytelling.
The professor enters with her usual elegance, a tall woman with soft curls and a warm smile that doesn't waver even when her students barely look up. She doesn't need to raise her voice to command the room. She carries presence the way some people carry perfume—effortlessly.
"Today," she begins, "we talk about longing." You feel your chest tighten in the most bittersweet way.
She reads a passage aloud—something from a contemporary poet you love but couldn't afford to buy the full collection of—and for a while, you forget the bruising ache in your back from yesterday, or the hollowness in your stomach. You forget Minjae. You forget Mrs. Do.
After class, you linger longer than usual, pretending to organize your papers while most students file out. Professor Cha doesn't seem surprised when you approach her desk.
"I loved what you read today," you say, voice still soft from reverence. "The way it ached."
Her eyes sparkle behind her glasses. "That's a good word. A poem should ache. And yours always do."
You blink. "You read my last submission?"
"I did." She smiles, more maternal than academic now. "You write like you've lived ten lives. There's heartbreak in your syntax, but also something... resilient. It's beautiful. Raw."
The compliment hits deeper than she probably intends. You swallow. "Thank you. I... needed to hear that."
She tilts her head. "You've looked tired lately."
"I got fired," you confess, voice breaking a little at the edges. "From one of my jobs." She doesn't blink or pity you, she nods instead. "Then the world made space for something better. Keep showing up. Your stories matter even if no one pays you for them yet."
It's not much but it's enough to lift your spine straighter as you thank her and walk out the door.
The sunshine doesn't feel quite so cold.
You're halfway down the campus stairs, still thinking about her words, when your phone rings. A number you don't recognize, but one you know instinctively not to ignore.
You answer.
"About damn time," a gravelly voice snaps through the line. "Did you turn off your phone all day or do you just enjoy making my blood pressure spike?"
You wince. "Sorry, Cee. I was in class—"
"I don't care if you were in confession with the Pope," he growls. "You missed your shift yesterday and you got us fired from the Do account." You open your mouth to explain, but he keeps going.
"Lucky for you," he says, as if the words are knives between his teeth, "no one else wants this new job and I'm too tired to argue. Penthouse gig. Rich recluse. We charge double, client pays in advance, and no one wants to take it because apparently the guy's a freak."
You frown. "A freak?"
"Unstable. Hermit. Been on the news, but who the hell keeps track? Listen, I don't care if he's a lizard in a human suit—he's paying. You're taking it."
Your throat dries.
"How many days?"
"Three a week. Big place. Clean what you can, don't snoop. I'll send the address. Be early." and then, just before he hangs up, his tone softens—barely. "Don't mess this up, kid. You need it."
You really, really do.
You stare at the phone screen even after the call ends, the manager's words still ringing in your ears. Freak. Hermit. Don't mess this up.
The ache in your calves from walking half a mile after the bus dropped you off doesn't compare to the slow sinking in your stomach as you lift your head to take in the building before you.
It's not just big—it's obscene. The kind of place you'd see in a glossy magazine left behind in a waiting room. Black glass, white stone, gold accents on the automatic double doors. No peeling paint, no squeaky hinges, no smell of cheap weed in the lobby. You shift your backpack higher on your shoulder and wipe your palms on your pants, suddenly hyper-aware of how out of place you look.
The doorman gives you a glance that says you're not the usual type, but he opens the door for you anyway. Inside, the lobby is quiet. Too quiet. Your footsteps echo on the marble like you're trespassing.
You check the note your manager texted again: Penthouse, 45th floor. Don't use the front elevator. Service lift in the back.
Figures.
You find the service lift through a hallway no guest would ever wander down—a dimly lit corridor that smells faintly of lemon polish and secrecy. The kind of place you get swallowed in. You step inside the narrow elevator, the floor humming under your boots.
The doors slide shut with a groan. You breathe out. The kind of breath that's supposed to steady you but doesn't.
Your phone buzzes again just before the elevator doors open.
Cee: Don't fuck this up. Get there exactly at 10, leave exactly at 4. Even if you finish early, you stay. No exceptions. And whatever you do, NEVER go upstairs. He has rules. Don't test them.
You stare at the screen.
What kind of house has an upstairs in a penthouse? you think, and the second the thought passes, the elevator dings.
The doors creak open onto a hallway draped in shadow. No welcome mat, no noise or signs of life. Just a wide, heavy door that looks more like it belongs on a bank vault than a home.
You step out.
Your boots sound stupidly loud on the marble tile, and you hesitate before raising your hand to knock. But there's no need. The moment your knuckles reach the wood, the door clicks open on its own.
Unlocked.
The place is massive. The ceilings stretch too high, the walls too white, everything too pristine. There's barely any furniture. Just space and silence and air so still it feels like it hasn't been disturbed in years. You don't call out cause your manager said he wouldn't speak to you and that he likely wouldn't even show himself.
Just clean and leave. Do not go upstairs.
You hold your breath and step inside.
The air smells like cedar and something colder, like snow, if snow could haunt. You set your backpack down, find the gloves and cleaning supplies neatly packed inside, and glance around for somewhere to begin. The living room stretches out in an open floor plan—windows from floor to ceiling, giving a panoramic view of the city that glitters like it belongs to someone else.
You move quietly, gently, like the house might shatter if you're not careful, there's a faint creak above you that makes you freeze.
Somewhere beyond the mezzanine level—a second floor, tucked behind shadows and sleek black railings—you hear slow footsteps. Nothing fast, just the sound of pacing but then it stops and you don't look up.
You don't have to but you can feel the weight of someone above you. Maybe it's just the paranoia settling in or maybe it's the echo of your manager's warning.
Don't go upstairs.
You lower your gaze and start cleaning the untouched coffee table. You don't see a single cup stain or a single fingerprint. You think of the journal in your bag—the one you always carry, the one you use to write about your clients. He'll be in there by tonight, nameless, faceless. The man who lives upstairs like a ghost in the penthouse he knows.
For now, you work. Quiet and invisible. There's a fine layer of dust on everything. Not filth—just time, settled air and neglect. No signs of life, no spilled coffee mugs or kicked-off shoes. Just clean lines, cold surfaces, and untouched space.
You start in the living room, wiping down the windowsills and working your way around the low furniture. The couch looks barely used, the cushions still stiff. You sweep, mop, vacuum, moving silently through the rooms that all look the same—stunning, sterile, too expensive to feel real.
In the hallway near the back, there's a closet.
You pause in front of it.
It's nothing special—just a tall, sleek black door flush against the wall like all the others. But your fingers hesitate on the handle. Something about it makes your stomach twist. A soft wrongness that makes you not open it, that makes you turn around and just keep cleaning.
By 2:30, you've gone through the whole first floor. Kitchen wiped down. Bathroom gleaming. Trash collected and everything you were paid to do—done.
But Cee's voice rings in your head; Even if you finish early—stay. No exceptions.
So you sit.
You settle into one of the chairs by the window, the soft hum of the city beyond the glass lulling you into something between boredom and thoughtfulness. You reach into your bag and pull out your journal—worn leather, pages soft at the edges.
You click your pen open and start writing.
Day one at the penthouse. It smells like dust and something else I can't quite name. The kind of clean that doesn't feel lived in. I didn't open the black closet near the back. It felt like something in a horror film but I'll pretend it's just full of broken umbrellas.
Got fired from the Do account. Still bitter. She had a face like a lemon and a heart to match. Professor was a much-needed balm in comparison—thank God for her and her endless belief in me.
New job might be decent money if I don't screw it up. Cee says the guy who lives here is a recluse. Said he hasn't left the penthouse in two years. But I don't know. Maybe he's just lonely.
You pause there, tapping the pen against the paper. The upper floor is quiet. Still. You underline the word lonely and draw a small star beside it.
At exactly 4:00, you pack up your supplies, double-check every corner, and sling your bag over your shoulder and slide your journal right back into the side pocket of your bag, safe and sound.
You take the service elevator down, your own reflection warping in the mirrored steel walls, and step out into the cool evening air. The sun is already dipping lower, the clouds streaked in gold and gray.
The bus ride home is slower than usual. You sit in the back corner, forehead pressed to the rattling glass, zoning out to the lull of traffic and tired bodies. The city outside blurs past in tired shades.
As your apartment door creaks open, you start praying no one hears or sees you. But it's already too late.
Minjae's voice rings out sharp and annoyed. "I told you I'm looking, Jiyoon. What do you want me to do, lie on a fucking application?"
Jiyoon fires back just as quickly. "No, I want you to try! I'm covering your half of the rent again this month—what do you think I am, an ATM?!"
You freeze in the doorway, trying to shrink into your coat. If you're quiet enough, maybe you can just slip past—
"Hey," Jiyoon says suddenly, spotting you over Minjae's shoulder. Her tone shifts fast—softer now, almost guilty. "You just get in?"
You nod, shrugging your bag higher. "Yeah." "How's the nut house?"
You drop your bag by the door and stare at her. "The what?"
"The place you're cleaning. You know, that recluse guy who's like—off his rocker? Isn't that what your boss said?"
You toe off your shoes and mutter, "It's just a job."
Minjae grins walking away from Jiyoon's presence like the change in topic is suddenly the end of their argument. "I bet he's got some freaky shit there. Hidden cameras. Severed heads. Weird old dude stuff."
"I don't even know if he's old," you say, voice low. "And you don't know anything about him."
Minjae snorts. "Whatever helps you sleep at night."
You turn back to Jiyoon, your constant irritation for her boyfriend crawling up your neck. "It's... weird," you admit. "But clean. Quiet. Better than getting yelled at by lemon-faced socialites, I guess."
Jiyoon gives you a weak smile. "Well, if anyone can survive a haunted tower or whatever that place is, it's you."
You hum, tired beyond belief, and slip down the hall toward your room without waiting for more, maybe more will come in the morning.
And when morning does come, it hits like a slow bruise. No alarm, just the muted scrape of a garbage truck outside and the sound of Jiyoon's laughter echoing down the hall, already too loud for the hour. You blink up at the water-stained ceiling, let the ache in your jaw settle, and for a few seconds, you don't move. The blanket's twisted around your leg like it's trying to keep you here. You wish it would.
But you're broke. So you move
You don't eat breakfast. There's no time, and besides, Jiyoon's boyfriend used the last of your cereal. You found the empty box in the sink this morning, soggy and limp with leftover milk, like a personal fuck-you from the universe.
Outside, the streets are still wet from last night's rain, the air sharp and cold enough to crack your lips. You tug your coat tighter around yourself and walk fast, half-hoping your legs will just carry you somewhere else. But the route to the campus library is too familiar, too automatic. You take the side street behind the deli, cutting through the alley behind the 24-hour laundromat where the machines always sound like they're choking. There's graffiti on the brick wall now—someone's drawn a woman with eyes for hands.
The library is warm in that stale, overused way that makes you sleepy, but you know the quiet corner where the heater rattles just enough to keep you awake. You sit with your laptop and your headphones, the cushion on the chair still warm from the last desperate student who used it.
This is job number two.
You click play on the next transcription project; an audiobook manuscript from some retired executive who thinks the world needs to hear about his rise to glory. The audio crackles. His voice is deep, smug, like he's narrating his own documentary.
"It all began with a vision. I was just a boy, standing in my father's study, realizing the empire I'd one day build..." You try not to roll your eyes. Your fingers find the rhythm. You transcribe as fast as he talks, catching every word, every pretentious pause.
"Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some, like me, are greatness incarnate."
Jesus.
You pause the audio and lean back, pressing your fingers into your temples. He's unbearable. Still—you need the money, so you press play again. But somewhere in the haze of his bravado, your mind drifts, not too far, just up.
Up to the penthouse you cleaned yesterday. The thick silence, untouched surfaces and the staircase you weren't allowed to climb. It all made something you couldn't name press down on the air.
You wonder what he sounds like.
The man who lives there, the one Cee called a shut-in, a recluse. Heeseung. You only know the name because of the envelope on the front table. You weren't supposed to look, but you did. Of course you did.
You imagine his voice now, layered under the pompous narration. Not loud or self-important. Just... quiet. Measured. Maybe hoarse from disuse. You imagine what it would feel like to hear it. To be the reason it breaks the silence. Your fingers falter. The word "greatness" stutters across the screen three times in a row.
You stop typing.
And for a second, you just sit there, headphones still on, the man's voice buzzing in your ears like a mosquito trapped in a jar, and you wonder if loneliness has a sound. And if maybe you've already heard it.
You leave the library when your laptop battery dies, the sky already smudged with dusk. Your ears still ring faintly from the droning of Mr. Greatness Incarnate. You swing your bag over your shoulder, scarf loose around your neck, hands shoved deep into your coat pockets. The wind cuts sharper than it did this morning. You're too tired to fight it.
By the time you reach your apartment building, you dread the climb to the third floor, not knowing what's behind your door—and your key sticks like always when you jam it into the lock but when the door finally swings open, you freeze.
The apartment is clean. Spotless even.
No laundry tossed across the couch, no cereal bowls fossilized with milk crust sitting on the coffee table. The garbage isn't overflowing. There's even a faint citrus scent in the air, like someone opened a window and let the idea of cleanliness drift in.
And Jiyoon's on the couch. Calm. Legs tucked under her, hair braided down one side, munching on a bag of shrimp chips like this is just... normal. Like this is how things have always been.
You drop your keys into the chipped bowl by the door. "What happened?" She glances at you, shrugs. "I cleaned." You blink. "No, I mean... what happened happened. Did the landlord threaten an inspection or—"
"I broke up with Minjae," she says, and pops another chip into her mouth like she didn't just detonate an-eighteen-month-long catastrophe with five words. "Told him to pack his shit and go."
You stare. "You what?"
Her eyes don't even flicker from the TV. "He was a leech. I hate leeches."
You're still frozen in the hallway, bag slipping down your arm, unsure what dimension you walked into. The silence feels wrong. Too still. Too empty. But... not bad.
Just different.
Eventually, your feet remember what to do, and you drift to your room, slowly, almost cautiously, like something might jump out at you. You twist your doorknob, push it open—and stop again cause there's a gift bag sitting on your bed.
Brown paper, neatly folded at the top, a little gold sticker sealing the tissue paper closed. You don't touch it right away, you just stare at it like it might explode.
Then you sit, gently, fingers trembling a little now. but peel the sticker away anyway, opening the bag.
Two bottles. Your favorite body wash. The same kind Minjae used up without asking. Double this time, still sealed and tucked between them, a note—scrawled in Jiyoon's quick, sharp handwriting on a sticky note she probably pulled from her planner.
"I'm sorry."
It doesn't say anything else. Doesn't have to.
You let out this huff of a sound, half a laugh, half a sob—and press the heels of your hands into your eyes. You weren't ready for this, especially not after today, not after everything you've been through this week. You sniff, smile through the sting behind your eyes, and whisper, "What the hell is going on?"
For the first time in a long time, no one answers and it doesn't feel like a threat. Just... peace. Quiet, a rare kind.
And the bathroom is yours again.
*•*•*
The next morning wakes you gently.
Not with screaming or slamming doors or the unmistakable sound of Minjae trying to justify why rent is a social construct—but with the smell of bacon.
You lie there for a moment, still curled in your sheets, nose twitching like it can't quite believe it. Bacon. And eggs. The sizzle, the clink of a pan. There's sunlight bleeding between the slats of your blinds, the kind of sleepy, golden light that feels warm just by looking at it.
You slip out of bed in your socks, shuffle into the kitchen, and there's Jiyoon—hair still messy from sleep, an oversized shirt hanging off one of her shoulders, poking a spatula at a pan like she does this every day, like this isn't a wildly new domestic era you've entered.
"Are you dying?" you ask, voice still rasped with sleep.
She smirks. "Sit your broke ass down. We're having breakfast." You do, blinking dumbly as she plates eggs and bacon and toast like some sitcom mom. The kind of meal that costs too much time and too many groceries for the world you live in. But it's real. It's on your plate. It's hot.
And it tastes like actual heaven.
"Okay," Jiyoon says through a bite, "you're not allowed to cry over eggs." "I'm not," you lie, chewing around the lump in your throat. "Shut up."
It's quiet for a beat, just the sounds of cutlery and your lives slowly stitching back together. Then she speaks, softer this time.
"I missed this."
You glance up.
"I mean—us," she says quickly. "It got weird. And Minjae was—he j—just made everything about him. And I let it happen." You nod, eyes falling to your plate. "I missed you too."
And that's all it takes. The two of you just... fall back into it. Like nothing ever cracked. Like the gap never grew wide enough to drown you.
You're halfway through your second cup of coffee when your phone buzzes. A bank notification lights up the screen.
Deposit: $400.00 — From: H.C.A. CLEANING INC.
Your breath catches and your stomach flips but you don't even have enough time to process it before a follow-up text comes in from your manager.
Cee: Well done. Keep it up.
You stare at your phone, stunned. Your fork hangs mid-air. "What?" Jiyoon leans over, eyes narrowing, trying to look at your screen. "What is it? What's that look?"
You show her the screen.
She lets out a whistle, snatching the phone out of your hand. "Four hundred dollars?! For one day?"
You nod slowly. "It's... the penthouse."
Jiyoon's eyes go wide. "Girl. Are you sure this isn't a sex dungeon?"
"It's not—!"
"I'm just saying!" she laughs, waving the phone in your face. "Do they need two cleaners? Cause I got two hands and a back that only mildly hurts."
You snort.
"No, seriously," she grins, handing your phone back. "Keep this up, and you're gonna sugar mama us out of this hellhole."
"Us?"
"Obviously. I've already picked out my new bedroom. It has a balcony."
You shake your head, grinning despite yourself. The weight on your chest feels a little lighter today. There's food in your stomach, laughter in your lungs, and a number in your bank account that feels like it belongs to someone else. Someone who isn't drowning, maybe someone who could start swimming soon.
You rinse your plate in the sink, tie your boots, and throw on your coat with renewed resilience. There's something weird in your chest—not bad weird. Just... fluttery. A quiet excitement you can't explain, maybe it's the money. $1200 a week is enough to make a broke girl like you feel fluttery.
The penthouse is a mystery. The man inside, even more so and something about it tugs at you. You leave the apartment with a full stomach and something flickering under your ribs that almost feels like hope.
The security guard barely glances up when you pass through the front lobby, your shoes echoing across the cold marble. You know the route now—the elevator on the far end, the one with the gilded trim and the keycard scanner that flickers green the second you swipe the little laminated badge clipped to your bag.
Penthouse access. Floor 45.
You ride up alone, the hum of the elevator filling your ears, your stomach still fluttering for some godforsaken reason. It's ridiculous, really. It's just cleaning. A job. A space.
Still—there's something about this building, this job, this man—something you don't have a name for yet. Something a little strange.
When the elevator dings open at the top floor, you step out and blink at the sheer silence. It always feels a little too still up here, like the air's holding its breath. You cross the short hallway toward the penthouse door, adjusting your bag over your shoulder, then pause.
A man is walking out.
Tall. Black coat. Black hair. He doesn't look up as he pulls the door behind him and lets it click shut. There's a thick folder of papers in his hand—some printed, some handwritten—and he's flipping through them like he's on a mission. Brows furrowed as though he's deep in thought. You shift slightly to the side, give a small, polite "Good morning," but he doesn't respond, he doesn't even glance at you.
Okay.
You watch him disappear down the hallway, a little unsettled, but before your brain can start drawing conclusions, you catch something else. From behind the door.
Movement. Light.
A quiet creak, then a faint thump from the floor above. Right—he's upstairs. He hasn't come down, just like your manager said he wouldn't.
So, not Heeseung.
You shake it off, and push open the door to the penthouse. It's the same as last time. Too clean to feel lived in, a place more structure than soul. The marble kitchen glints under the soft daylight that pours in through those floor-to-ceiling windows, and the air smells faintly sterile. Like eucalyptus and untouched laundry.
You drop your bag by the door, change into your inside shoes, and head for the linen closet to start where you left off last time.
There's a note.
You spot it taped neatly to the inside of the closet door, white paper against the cool gray shelves. Typed in black ink, neatly, not handwritten.
You folded the towels wrong.
Beneath it, stapled neatly, is a printed diagram. A diagram with steps and numbered illustrations. You blink. It's absurd. It's pedantic. It's—
You laugh, quietly, to yourself. "What a nutjob," you mutter under your breath, echoing Jiyoon's words.
And then you catch yourself.
He's paying you. Four hundred dollars. For one day. To clean and to follow instructions. Folding towels properly is not asking too much—not for this kind of money, not for the kind of life you're trying to claw your way toward.
You shake your head, shoulders straightening, and refold every towel in the linen closet with the care of a military cadet. Corners aligned, fold sharp, just the way the diagram instructs.
Once you've checked them twice, you move on. The floors—again. There's always a thin veil of dust on the hardwood, like no one has lived here in years. The glass in the shower, the streaks on the chrome fixtures. You find a guest room with a window cracked just slightly, letting in the city noise below, and you seal it shut.
It's all the same movements as last time. Your body goes through the checklist while your mind wanders, as it always does. Little fragments of poetry rise up behind your eyes. A line about silence that weighs too much, about towels that speak louder than people. You file them away for later.
And like last time, you finish early.
3:26.
You double-check the space. Everything in order. Then you drift toward the single chair by the massive window that overlooks the skyline. The same chair you sat in last time. You pull out your journal, and you start writing.
He left a note about the towels. Said I did it wrong. I guess... he's not what I imagined. There's something almost neurotic about him, but not messy. Not in a Minjae way. It's all too deliberate. He's exacting. Controlled. Still not a trace of him anywhere—not a pair of shoes, not a book out of place. It's like he's trying to erase his presence even though it's so obviously here, breathing under everything.
Your pen hovers, you almost scratch it all out, but you don't.
A soft thud interrupts you. Distant. Upstairs. You freeze, eyes lifting from the page.
Another sound. A voice—muffled. A man's voice, low and smooth, bleeding through the ceiling like the floorboards are too thin to keep him contained.
You can't make out the words, but you hear the timbre. The rhythm.
You write until your hand cramps and the ink starts to skip. At 3:52, you check the time and shut the journal slowly, your gaze drifting out the window for a long moment.
But then... it happens again.
Your eyes flick to the closet door.
Same as last time. Same quiet weight pressing against your chest when you look at it. You don't know what it is about it—just a regular black door, no lock, no sign, nothing particularly ominous—but it nags at you. And before you know it, your legs are moving.
Soft steps across the hardwood. You don't even really make the decision—you just find yourself there, hand on the doorknob, heart ticking unevenly.
It's probably something stupid. Creepy. Like a skeleton, or jars of teeth. A body. It's always the ones who care too much about towel folding who hide people in their walls.
You exhale, slow, and turn the knob.
The door creaks open.
It's dim, a strip of light spilling in over your feet—and then your eyes adjust.
Not bodies. Not bones.
Photos.
Hundreds of them. Pinned to corkboard walls, stacked in boxes, frames leaning against shelves. Posters rolled into rubber-banded scrolls. A trophy case sits in the corner, glass clean, the metal plaques catching the light like little knives.
You blink, stepping in cautiously.
There are certificates. Paper yellowed with age. Borletti-Buitoni Trust Award. First Place—2022. Van Cliburn International Piano Competition 2021. Tchaikovsky Conservatory Excellence Award 2023. All in English, some in Korean, some in French.
You walk along the wall, fingertips brushing the edge of a matte photo. A group picture. A symphony ensemble, maybe. Then another, a candid shot of a teenage boy at a grand piano, his hands hovering above the keys, his brow furrowed like the music is something physical he's trying to catch.
And then another. A close-up this time. His face.
Heeseung.
Your breath catches.
He's younger in these—baby-faced almost—but you want to believe it's him. There's something about his posture, his expression, that quiet intensity even the camera couldn't wash out.
You crouch beside a crate of rolled-up posters and untangle one gently. The paper's dusty, brittle near the corners. When you unroll it, it flutters open across your lap.
A concert poster. The image glossy and faded with time: a sleek black grand piano under a single spotlight. A man sits at it, back straight, head bowed. His name sprawls across the top in elegant serif font:
LEE HEESEUNG
It's signed at the bottom, right across the curve of the piano. —With love, always, LH.
You stare at it for a long moment.
And then... the pieces begin to arrange themselves.
The penthouse. The silence. The exactness. The distance. And now—this.
He must've been a concert pianist.
You blink again, stunned that you'd never heard of him. Someone who'd clearly been celebrated, decorated, known. At some point, at least.
You tuck the poster back carefully and ease the door shut behind you. But the quiet feels different now. Not empty.
The whole bus ride home, your brain won't stop flipping through those images—trophies, posters, photos, that signature on the rolled-up poster. With love, always, LH. You hold it all in your head like puzzle pieces that almost fit, just not quite yet. But there's no mistaking it—the man in the penthouse was someone once.
The apartment smells like garlic and soy sauce when you walk in. You blink at the strange scent, automatically bracing for another fight—but it's quiet. Peaceful, even. The living room light is on, and Jiyoon's perched on the couch still in her stiff black skirt and her knock-off kitten heels, hair pinned up and eyeliner smudged.
"Hey," she says, not looking up from her phone. "Dinner's in the microwave. I made bulgogi."
You pause in the doorway, still blinking, confused. "You cooked?"
She shrugs. "Had a day. Needed to stir something before I murdered someone."
You heat up your plate and sink into the couch beside her, pulling your knees up and balancing the food on top. The meat is tender, warm and sweet, and the rice is just sticky enough.
"So?" she mumbles, mouth full of chips. "How's the nutjob in the tower?"
You laugh, almost choking on rice. "He's not a nutjob."
"Old man, then."
You glance at her. "He's not old."
She raises an eyebrow. "Yeah? And how do you know that?"
You chew slowly, smirking to yourself. "I did his laundry today."
"Oh?" She sits up straighter, grinning. "And what? The briefs don't lie?"
You laugh, snorting, and try to wave her off, cheeks hot. "No, just—his clothes. They weren't... old man clothes."
She gives you the most exaggerated eyebrow wiggle you've ever seen. "Ohhhh. So they were hot man clothes."
"Shut up."
"You want to see what he looks like," she accuses, pointing a chip at you.
You mumble something under your breath, something you don't even realize you've said aloud until she gasps.
"What was that?" she demands. "Tell me. Tell me right now."
You set your plate aside and sink into the couch cushions, eyes on the ceiling. "Okay. Fine. I opened some weird closet in his hallway today"
Her jaw drops.
"And?"
You tell her everything. The photos. The awards. The posters and the certificates. The name. The signature. The signed poster. You recite the words, LEE HEESEUNG.
She blinks. "Wait. Wait wait wait. You mean the dude you clean for is famous?"
"Was," you say softly. "I think he was famous. He was a concert pianist."
There's a beat of silence then she's snatching up her laptop. "What are we doing just sitting here? Let's Google him."
You shift beside her as she types in his name watching it autofill halfway through. She scrolls.
First result: a blurry photo of a younger Heeseung at a concert, fingers splayed on the keys.
Second result: Top 10 Rising Stars of the Classical World.
Third: The Golden Boy of the Grand Piano—Why Lee Heeseung Was Next.
There are photos—clean, posed ones, then live shots of him in motion, bent over the keys, expression contorted like the music is tearing out of him.
"Damn," Jiyoon whispers. "He was hot."
You smack her arm. "Focus."
She scrolls again—and then pauses.
You feel her go still beside you.
Her thumb hovers over the next headline.
Concert Pianist Lee Heeseung Suffers On-Stage Mental Breakdown During Performance.
Your stomach drops. It's dated 2 years ago.
"Holy shit," she whispers.
There's a thumbnail image of the article and beneath it, a video. Your fingers are trembling but you press play anyway.
The video opens on a massive concert hall. Heeseung sits alone at a grand piano under a soft blue spotlight. There's silence—and then music. Soaring, masterful, all-consuming. His fingers move like they're made of air.
He plays so beautifully that you find yourself immersed but then, something shifts.
His hands slow. His face tenses. He mutters something under his breath, eyes wide like he's seeing something the rest of the room can't. Then—
A violent slam of the keys.
The audience flinches.
He starts playing again, erratically, pounding the piano with discordant noise. His head jerks to the side. He mutters again, louder this time. Words you can't make out. Security rushes the stage. The video ends in chaos, with the camera shaking, audience gasping.
You stare at the screen long after it's gone black.
"That's why," you whisper.
Jiyoon nods slowly. "That's why he lives like that now."
Neither of you speak for a long time. There's just the hum of the microwave clock ticking forward, the faint buzz of the fridge, the afterimage of that video burned into your mind.
Heeseung isn't just a recluse. He's a man who was once made of music—and then unraveled by it.
The video plays again in your head when the screen's long since gone black.
Heeseung's face in that last shot—wild and glassy-eyed, haunted—lingers like smoke. Even with the dinner gone and the dishes rinsed, even with the taste of bulgogi faded from your tongue, it clings to your ribs.
Jiyoon breaks the silence first. She sets her laptop down with a sigh and rubs her forehead like she's trying to will away her own stress.
"Anyway," she mutters, "my manager's still a raging bitch."
The shift in topic feels abrupt, like someone slammed the door on something unfinished. You blink and turn your head, trying to meet her halfway.
"She moved my report to a different folder this morning and then cc'd her manager asking where mine was," Jiyoon grumbles, tossing a chip in her mouth. "Like she didn't just put it there herself. I swear she's trying to build a case to get me fired."
You hum a vague sound of sympathy, but your eyes are unfocused. Your thoughts are half in that concert hall, half in that penthouse closet, all tangled up with things that don't make sense yet.
Jiyoon squints at you, crunching slowly. "Hey. You okay?"
"Yeah," you say, blinking hard. "Sorry. I just..."
"You look tired," she says gently. "Like tired-tired. Go to bed."
You nod. "I will. Just—gonna change first."
She lets you go, and you disappear into your room, clicking the door shut behind you.
The quiet hits fast.
You peel off your jacket, your jeans. Change into your sleep shirt. The light on your desk is soft and yellow, and you go to your tote bag by instinct, unzipping it without thinking.
You freeze.
Your fingers reach the bottom of the bag.
You check again.
Then again.
Your journal's not there.
You turn the bag upside down—shake it, even though you know how pointless it is—and the only thing that falls out is a used lip balm, your wallet and your bus pass.
You drop to your knees beside the desk, rifling through the bag's compartments. Check under your bed. In your drawers. You dig through the laundry pile.
Your breath quickens. Your pulse starts to speed.
A whole year and a half. That's how long you've been writing in that journal. Every scattered thought, every tiny win, every loss, every panic attack, every private daydream. It's not just a notebook—it's you. You wrote yourself into those pages, over and over and you can think is; it's gone.
You dart back into the living room, voice already strained. "Jiyoon—have you seen my journal? The brown one?"
She looks up from her phone, blinking. "Journal? No. Did you leave it at the library?"
You shake your head too fast. "No—I had it with me. I know I had it with me. I wrote in it today, I always put it in the tote after, I—I—"
She sits up straighter. "Okay, hey. Don't panic. Maybe it slipped out on the bus?"
You clutch your arms, stomach turning. The thought of it sitting there in some grimy bus seat, left behind, already flipped through by strangers, your handwriting exposed—your insides exposed—makes you sick.
Your throat tightens.
"Hey," Jiyoon says, getting up now, her voice softer. "It's okay. We'll retrace your steps tomorrow, alright?"
But you're already crying. Not big sobs—just quiet, stunned tears, the kind that sting as they fall, the kind you can't stop once they start.
You laugh bitterly through it, pressing your palm to your mouth. "It's stupid," you mumble. "It's just a journal."
"It's not stupid," Jiyoon says, crossing the room and pulling you into a hug.
You close your eyes. Her office clothes smell like starch and soy sauce and the bad perfume her coworker probably wears, but her arms are warm and solid around you.
Still, your heart aches like something's gone missing.
And somewhere—somewhere else—those pages are no longer just yours.
*•*•*
You don't even realize how much weight you've been dragging until it starts to leave marks—under your eyes, behind your ribs, along your spine.
It's been a whole day without it. Twenty-four hours without your journal and you're already unraveling. Not crying anymore—just dulled out. The kind of sadness that makes everything taste like paper, feel like static.
Jiyoon tried her best. She really did. She even called in sick that morning just to help look. Said her manager could go chew on gravel, she didn't care. She pulled you out of bed, made you drink an iced coffee, and walked with you back to every single place you'd been.
You retraced your steps with her hand on your shoulder the entire time—gentle, like you'd break.
Back to the library. Back to the plaza where you sat for five minutes waiting on the bus. You even got on the same damn route, asked the driver if he'd seen a brown journal with an elastic band and too many taped-in receipts.
Nothing.
Just a kind smile from a man who said he was sorry and wished you luck.
So when Friday comes around—when you have to drag yourself out of bed again for the penthouse job—you feel heavy. Disconnected. You brush your teeth with your eyes half-closed. Tie your laces without bothering to double knot them. You're not crying, not even angry, just—
Faded.
You leave the house a little past nine. Jiyoon waves from the couch but doesn't try to stop you. She knows money talks, even when you're too tired to listen.
You arrive at ten sharp like always. Same hallway, same elevator ding, same code punched into the keypad.
The door opens.
And the stillness inside hits you harder than usual. Not just quiet—vacant. Like the walls themselves are holding their breath.
You don't bother kicking off your shoes this time.
You walk in and turn toward the kitchen to get the supplies—straight to the cabinets under the sink—and that's when you freeze.
There.
On the counter.
Your journal.
You stand still for so long the air starts to pulse in your ears cause it's open. Pages parted like a secret mid-sentence. And the breath that's been caged in your lungs for a whole day catches halfway up your throat.
You move closer. Like if you blink too hard it'll vanish.
It's turned to that entry. The one you wrote after cleaning here the first time—where you wrote about the towels and the light and the strange emptiness of a life lived up high and alone. The part where you called him lonely.
Your eyes track the handwriting in the margin. Small. Neat. Slightly angled.
An arrow is drawn from the word lonely and next to it, in ink that definitely isn't yours:
you have no idea.
Your throat goes dry.
You run your fingertips over the words—his words—like touching them will make them make sense. But they don't. Not really. They just buzz in your chest like something secret and sad and suddenly real.
He read it. He read it.
And not just read it—responded.
You sink into the nearest stool, heart hammering, holding the journal like it might slip away again.
This man—this ghost of a man, the one who hides behind silence and rules and perfectly folded towels—he read you. And then he left this like it wasn't a confession. Like it wasn't a crack in the wall you didn't think you'd ever see.
"You have no idea."
You don't.
But for the first time, you think you want to so you tear a sheet from the back of your journal. The lines are faint blue, the edge ragged where it rips. You stare at it longer than necessary—like the paper's going to change its mind about letting you say what you need to.
Your hand shakes as you write it, "I didn't mean to be invasive, just honest."
You don't sign it.
You fold it in half once, then again. Then you slide it under the coaster on the marble coffee table—tucked, but not hidden. If he wants to find it, he will.
And then you're out the door. Before 4, for the the first time not caring about the rule.
*•*•*
When you get home, Jiyoon's door is locked. You knock once, then try the handle. Still locked. "Jiyoon," you call. "Let me in." Nothing, so you knock harder. When she finally opens it, her hair is a mess and her cheeks are a deep, guilty pink. She looks like she just sprinted a mile and saw God somewhere in the middle of it.
You know what she was doing but you don't care, you just brush right past her and drop your journal on her bed like it's a live grenade.
"He read my fucking journal," you hiss, turning on your heel. "He wrote in it." "What!?" Jiyoon gasps, not even trying to play it cool. "That's where you left it?!"
"I didn't mean to!" "Wait—he wrote in it? Like, wrote wrote? Pen to page?" You nod, pacing like your bones are electric. "He responded to a line I wrote about him being lonely. Just—drew an arrow to it and wrote 'you have no idea.' Like what the fuck is that even supposed to mean!?" "That's—" She stops. Blinks. Then starts again, because of course she has to. "That's kind of hot," she says, lips twitching.
"Jiyoon!" "Okay, okay! It's fucked up, but it's also..." She trails off, thoughtful. "It's kind of giving tortured artist. Haunted tower. Piano-playing ghost with emotional constipation." You flop onto her bed, face buried in your hands. "I feel violated. But also like...I violated him first? Is that weird? I feel like we both got naked and didn't mean to."
"That is the weirdest metaphor you've ever said," Jiyoon mutters, but there's affection under it and you're about to respond but then your phone rings. Shrill and loud against the padded silence of Jiyoon's room. You check the screen and it's Cee. You answer it with a sigh. "Hello?" "What the fuck is wrong with you?" He barks immediately. "Did you leave before 4?" Your stomach drops. "Yes, I did, but—"
"You had clear fucking instructions! You don't leave before 4. Ever."
"I had to. I was done, I—" "I don't give a shit," he snaps. "From now on? You clean for him every day. That's what he wants." You blink. "Every day?"
"Every. Fucking. Day. Starting tomorrow." The line goes dead. You lower the phone slowly and Jiyoon's looking at you like you just told her you're moving to Mars. "You're cleaning for him every day?" You nod, feeling numb. She whistles. "Guess you better start folding towels in your dreams."
You flop back on her bed again, journal beside you, limbs heavy and brain scrambled, because somehow this man has read your secrets, insulted your towel folding, haunted your thoughts and gotten you trapped in a daily cleaning contract. You stare at the ceiling, heart a mess of beats. You truly have no idea what the hell you've gotten yourself into, just like Heeseung wrote.
*•*•*
You hate today. Not in the throwaway I-hate-Mondays kind of way, but in that deep, simmering, "I'd rather get hit by a bus than scrub your already-clean floors for six hours" kind of way. It's Saturday. Saturday. And you're supposed to be doing anything else. Sleeping in. Going to the corner store with Jiyoon in your pajamas. Sitting in silence and mourning the part of yourself that used to be a free woman.
Instead, you're here. The penthouse again. Cold and looming and weirdly beautiful in a way you hate to admit. It's only 9:30. You're early and you could wait. You should wait. But something reckless and slightly unhinged is buzzing in your blood—maybe it's the journal thing, or the fact that he read every single thing you've ever written about yourself. You don't know.
You just know that this time, you're not waiting. You take the elevator up. No code. No warning. Just your footsteps, soft and slow, echoing across the marble as you step into the penthouse and then—you stop. Dead.
Because there's someone already down here, in fact two someones. One of them, you recognize as the man you saw leaving that day—now unmistakably a doctor of some sort, clipboard in hand, every movement clinical and restrained. He's sitting next to another man. A man who's— Oh fuck.
Shirtless.
Barefoot. Wearing only a pair of jeans that hang low on his hips like they're barely there at all. Lee Heeseung, the one on all the pictures and posters in the haunting closet, the one from the articles you saw.He's not a ghost or a shadow upstairs. He's definitely real and he's here, laughing at something he just said, a low warm sound that breaks the silence—and then cuts off the second he sees you.They both stare and you can't help but stare back cause your brain short-circuits because not only is he real—he's gorgeous. Devastatingly beautiful in a way that feels cruel. Sharp jaw, dark hair a mess, skin golden and soft in the morning light and then the audacity of the amused curl of his mouth as he takes you in.
The doctor doesn't laugh at Heeseung's joke, he just closes his clipboard with a hard snap, locks the files into a black case with practiced hands, mutters something clipped to Heeseung, and walks past you like you're air. You don't move, not because you don't want to but because you can't. And now Heeseung just stands there, right in front of you, 6 feet away. Shirtless.
As if this is all some sort of routine, where he expected you to show up early to catch him sitting there. Then he speaks. Voice low, smooth, maddeningly calm. "You're early."
You blink, stunned mute. He cocks his head slightly. Barely.
"Is this how you always barge into my home?" You open your mouth but you have to close it again because no words will come out.Because all you can think is holy shit. Not only is he not old, like Jiyoon said, not only is he not some weird piano hermit ghost—he is breathtaking. And apparently, deeply unbothered by the fact that you've just witnessed whatever strange intimate evaluation that was.
"I—sorry," you finally manage, voice rough to the point of shame. "I didn't think—there was someone—upstairs, usually—" Heeseung raises an eyebrow, clearly entertained. "You didn't think as I didn't think you'd be here before ten, hmm?" You bristle, flustered and mortified and somewhere under all that, burning. "I'm just here to clean." He smiles at that and it's not kind, it's not mocking either. Just... knowing, he's got that look—the kind that says he's already pages ahead in your journal entry for tonight, already memorized the lines, already knows exactly how this ends.
"Good," he says. "Then clean." And he walks past you—slow, easy, barefoot steps—disappearing back up the stairs without another word. Leaving you there, alone with your rage, your humiliation, and your heart pounding so loud in your chest it echoes in the silence. What do you do now? You clean. Of course you do. That's what you're here for, and you already showed up thirty minutes earlier than you were supposed to, so now you're finishing faster than usual—dusting the shelves with extra care just to stall, organizing the rows of books he never touches, wiping down the marble countertops even though they don't look like they've been used in days.
And all the while your brain won't stop looping back to your journal on his kitchen counter, to the handwriting in the margins that isn't yours, to the arrow pointing right to the word lonely and the quiet weight of you have no idea written beneath it.
It's unfair, you think, the way he's just living in his architectural digest penthouse, barefoot and cryptic, while you're pacing through his living room, trying not to wonder how much of your life he's read. You almost forget the weight of it—almost—until he's suddenly back.
You hear him before you see him, the soft sound of his footsteps against the dark wood floor, and when you turn, there he is.
Coming down the stairs like a fucking problem you can't afford to have, still barefoot, still in those jeans that hang too low on his hips, but now in a loose linen shirt that he didn't even bother to button all the way.
It's distracting, infuriatingly so. You don't even want to think about how hot he is—because it's wrong, and messy, and also, you're still mad.
He sees you before you can pretend you weren't watching him descend like some kind of fallen angel with unresolved trauma, and for a moment, he says nothing. Just stands there at the bottom of the stairs, head tilted slightly, his eyes unreadably deep, like he's trying to pin you to the spot with silence alone.
Then he turns, walks toward the closet in the hallway—the one with the photographs and trophies and that signed, rolled-up poster of his own damn face—and you stare after him without meaning to, without even trying to be subtle. There's something about the way he moves, like someone who hasn't had to explain himself in years, like someone who only speaks when the silence becomes too loud to tolerate.
You don't expect him to come back out and walk straight toward you and you definitely don't expect him to stop right in front of you to speak.
"Do you always sit in my chair when you psychoanalyze me in your journal?" His voice is even, smooth, and just sharp enough to make your jaw clench. There's something teasing in it, mocking maybe, or maybe just observant, but either way—it makes your chest tighten.
You straighten where you sit, looking up at him without flinching. "You had no right to read my journal."
He doesn't flinch either.
"You wouldn't read a strange book you found in your house?"
And that's what throws you—how casual he says it, how unbothered he is by the violation, like it was never that serious to begin with.
In your head, you're screaming. Not because you're scared, but because it's almost worse that he read it without hesitation. Because that journal was yours, it was everything. A year and a half of pain and boredom and loneliness and softness and tiny bursts of joy that you didn't know where else to put. Little poems about love you've never felt. Sentences that barely made sense to you at the time. Half-finished stories and full-bodied grief. And now he knows. Maybe not all of it—but enough.
You bite your tongue before your mouth runs wild, but your thoughts are already racing.
He read it. He read all of it, probably. God, did he see the poem you wrote about the boy who only existed in your dreams? Did he read the list of things you want to do before you die? Did he see the part about wanting someone to ask you how your day was, without needing a reason?
You want to be mad. You are mad. But under that is the hot sting of embarrassment, the helplessness of being seen without warning, without consent.
He's still watching you, expression still unreadable.
You blink hard. "It wasn't for you."
"I figured."
You exhale sharply through your nose. "Then why did you—"
He cuts you off without cutting you off. His voice is softer this time. "I found your note."
That makes your stomach turn.
You remember the note. I didn't mean to be invasive, just honest.
You didn't even think when you left it. You just wrote it and ran. And now he's standing here, bare feet planted firmly on the floor, chest half-exposed, staring at you like your truth didn't scare him off at all.
"I don't think you're invasive," he says. "You were just... honest, like you said."
That word again.
And suddenly you're not sure what this is anymore—what he is. Because he's not yelling. He's not smug. You don't even think he's trying to humiliate you, he's just standing there, calm, casual—as if this is routine, as if your journal wasn't a goddamn blueprint of everything you never said out loud. As if he didn't drag his pen under the word lonely and scrawl you have no idea in the margins, careless, cruel, and so absurdly calm about it.
You really don't know what to say but you guess your silence must say enough, because his eyes soften just enough to sting.
"People don't usually stay when I'm honest," He says it like it's already written in stone, something that happened, not something he's choosing.
You just sit there, unsure if you're still furious or if your heart just broke a little for a man you don't understand at all.
You really want to ask him why he wrote in your journal, why he felt comfortable enough to reply to it like you were in some kind of conversation. You should get up and walk out, slam the door for good measure, remind him you're the help and he's a man who's too comfortable living above the rest of the world, shirtless and half-smiling at things that should have been private. But instead, you're still sitting there.
And instead of leaving, you ask, "What's with the whole coming at ten and leaving at four thing?"
He blinks.
It's not the question he expected, maybe not the one you expected either, but it's already out in the air now and hanging between you like mist.
He exhales through his nose, shifting his weight slightly as he leans a hip against the back of the chair across from you. You watch the movement—too closely—and hate how your eyes keep catching on the little things: the curve of his collarbone, the faint line of a vein down his forearm, the way he smells faintly like vanilla and clean linen. You force your gaze back up to his face.
He doesn't answer right away.
Then, after a moment, he says, "I just thought six hours was enough time for you to do what you needed."
It's almost clipped, controlled.
"And..." He pauses, eyes flicking to the side, as if choosing his next words carefully. "It's better for you if you follow it."
You blink. "What do you mean better for me?"
He shrugs one shoulder, nonchalant but not exactly casual. "You walked in on something you weren't supposed to see this morning."
Your mind flashes back to that moment—the doctor, the manilla folders, the way Heeseung was sitting on the chair laughing to himself with no shirt on and then suddenly not laughing at all.
Your throat feels a little dry.
"You mean the doctor?" you ask carefully.
He nods once. "Yeah." Then, quieter, "There are... things I deal with. Things I don't need anyone witnessing."
It's not quite a warning. Not quite a confession either. It floats in the space between.
You shift in your seat, uncertain. "So the schedule is more for... your privacy?"
He lets out a sound that's almost a laugh but not quite, low and humorless. "Sure. Let's go with that."
There's something in the way he says it that tells you he doesn't really mean it—not entirely. Like there's more he could say if he wanted to, but he doesn't.
Still, you nod slowly, even though you don't really understand. Even though the idea of spending six hours in a place that holds your most personal words hostage is suffocating.
Even though his presence is starting to feel... electric in the worst and best way.
And then, after a beat, you ask softly, "And what happens if I don't follow it?"
He looks at you.
Really looks at you.
And for a second, something shifts. The air between you turns thicker, heavier. You can feel his eyes like heat on your skin.
"I don't think you'd want to find out," he says, voice low and quiet, but not threatening. Just true.
And you believe him.
Not because you think he'd hurt you. But because there are some parts of him—some stories, some shadows—you haven't earned the right to touch yet.
You don't answer.
You just hold his gaze until it feels like it burns and then drop your eyes to your hands and stand up to walk away, walk towards the door
He straightens then, subtly, pushing off from the chair like the moment's passed. You don't know if you're relieved or disappointed.
"Of course a person as beautiful as you would write so heartbreakingly beautiful." It's low. Almost to himself. Like he didn't mean to say it aloud.
But you hear it.
And it feels like your ribcage cracks clean in half.
You turn—just slightly, just enough to look at him over your shoulder. He's not even watching you. He's looking down at the floor, one hand resting loosely on the back of the chair like he hadn't just broken you open and left you bleeding all over his expensive floors.
"What did you ju—" you almost ask but he's already cutting you off. "You're done for the day, right?"
You barely nod, fully facing him now, bewildered.
"Then you should go."
You turn around and walk slowly, legs a little stiff, journal heavy in your bag, chest heavier still.
And as you move past him, toward the front door, he doesn't say anything else.
He just watches you go.
You walk home like your body isn't yours, it feels like your bones are made of sound, the way you hear everything but can't feel a single step. Your bag is even heavier than it should be for some reason.
The door to your apartment creaks as you open it. Warmth hits you in the face. Jiyoon's music is loud—some upbeat synth-pop song she always plays when she's cooking—and the smell of garlic and oil and something spicy wraps around you like a familiar blanket. But you don't step in right away. You stand in the doorway a little too long, still wearing your shoes, still holding your keys in one hand like you forgot what they're for.
Then she turns. She sees you.
And she freezes.
The music doesn't. But she grabs her phone and hits pause mid-chorus, eyebrows already pulled together in the way they do when she's bracing herself for gossip. "You look... feral."
You blink. "What?"
"Your face," she says, pointing a wooden spoon at you. "It's giving war-torn romantic heroine. What happened?"
You close the door behind you. You walk inside. You don't know where to begin.
So you say the first thing that spills from your mouth.
"I saw him."
She doesn't need clarification. "Him?"
You nod.
"Lee Heeseung?"
You nod again.
She gasps so loud the spoon hits the floor.
You don't laugh. You can't.
"He was shirtless," you add quietly, like it's something illegal.
Jiyoon makes a noise so high-pitched only the dead could hear it.
"No. No. No," she says, rushing over and grabbing both your arms like she's checking for a pulse. "You have to tell me everything. And I mean everything. Did he talk to you? Did he breathe near you? Did he smell good? Does he look weird? Did you black out? Are you still alive? Blink twice if you need CPR."
You let out a long breath, barely a laugh. "He was laughing with some man. A doctor, I think. He was barefoot. Just jeans, low. He didn't even look at me at first. Just kind of... existed."
You don't realize how tightly you're gripping the edge of the counter until your knuckles start to ache.
"Then he did see me later when he came back down, I was sitting. In that chair I said I always journal in. And he just... stared. Then he disappeared into that hallway closet with all the photos and came back out without something, and I watched him the whole time like a creep." Jiyoon looks winded. "This is already the best thing I've ever heard."
"He asked me if I always sit in his chair when I psychoanalyze him in my journal." Her eyes explode. "No."
You nod. "Yes."
"What did you say?"
"I told him he had no right to read it."
"Did he deny it?" You shake your head slowly. "He said—and I quote—'you wouldn't read a strange book you found in your house?'" Jiyoon puts her whole body on the counter, like gravity's too much. "This is sick. This is sick. I can't believe you're living out the plot of the exact kind of emotionally unstable literature you always say you hate." You let your head fall next to hers. "I'm going to have to switch some of my classes."
She lifts her face, blinking. "Wait, what?"
"I can't keep going in the mornings. Not if I'm cleaning for him every day. The only opening left in my schedule is evening sections and some online ones, and I'll probably miss my favorite professors class."
"You love that class."
"I know."
"I don't know if you can tell but you're kind of acting like it's worth it"
*•*•*
You wake up feeling weirdly... eager. Which is insane in your opinion. It's cleaning. You're going to clean for six hours in a house where the walls are silent and the air feels kind of tight, and maybe—maybe—he'll come down again. Maybe he won't. You tell yourself it doesn't matter. You dress in your usual oversized tee and leggings, but you switch your sneakers for the cleaner pair, the ones without scuff marks. You spend longer on your face than necessary. Just moisturizer, a little concealer—nothing obvious. Just in case. You tell yourself it's just habit. You tell yourself a lot of things.
You get there at 9:57. By 10:02, your coat is hung up and the cleaning supplies are laid out in their usual corners. The house is quiet—same as always—but now it's a different kind of quiet. Now you know who it's holding and it makes you all irrationally aware of everything.
You start with the mirrors.
Not because they're dirty. They're not.
But because they reflect the hallway, and every time you glance up, you can see the top of the stairs.
By 11:17, you've vacuumed every rug on the main floor. Nothing.
By 12:04, you've re-organized the kitchen drawers. Again. Not that he'd notice. You don't even know if he uses them.
By 12:58, you're dusting frames that don't need dusting, glancing at the ceiling like footsteps might fall out of it.
By 1:45, you've convinced yourself he's not coming down. That yesterday was a one-off. That he's upstairs doing whatever rich, complicated people do—brooding maybe, like some Austenian shut-in. You try to laugh at yourself for even caring but it sits low in your chest. He's just a man, you only even met him once.
So why does it feel this weird? You're so distracted you almost forget to check the pantry. You always check the pantry. And when you finally do, you find it's already been stocked. Someone else did it.
Maybe him.
Your stomach turns and don't know why. By 3:50, you're packing your things, fingers slow on the zipper of your bag. By 3:56, you're glancing around the room like it might give you a reason to stay longer. By 3:58, you hear it.
Footsteps that make you freeze. And there he is.
Heeseung. Descending the stairs like it's nothing. Like he didn't make you wait all day without knowing you were waiting. He's wearing another linen shirt—this one in charcoal—and it's loose over his frame, the top two buttons undone. His hair is a little messy, like he's been lying down or pulling his fingers through it and, he's barefoot again. He smiles.
"Hey," he says, voice warm in that slow, easy way. "You're still here." You swallow. "Not for long."
He steps down the last stair. "How was your day?" You blink at him. It takes a second for your voice to catch up. "I spent it here. You tell me." His brows lift a little. Not offended—more amused. He shifts his weight and leans against the banister.
"I missed my favorite class."
"You're a student? And you missed a class? Because of this?" You glance down at your hands. They're still a little red from scrubbing tile. "Yeah."
He's quiet for a second. "Have you had dinner?" You start to say no—but your stomach betrays you before your mouth can lie. It growls. Audibly. Your eyes go wide and he laughs at your expression. "Sit," he says, already turning toward the kitchen. "I'll make something."
You blink. "What? No, that's not—" He turns to look at you over his shoulder. "Sit." And there's something in the way he says it that has you obeying, hesitantly still. The counter's cool beneath your palms as you lower yourself into the chair, eyes tracking his every movement. He moves so naturally in the kitchen—opens the fridge with one hand, pulls down a skillet with the other, all casual familiarity and soft clattering sounds. It smells like garlic again. Butter. Something fresh.
"What are you making?" you ask.
He shrugs. "Something edible. Hopefully."
Heeseung's cutting vegetables like he's done it a thousand times. He slices a tomato without looking down, throws it into a pan, then adds something else from a jar. The sizzle is instant.
You lean forward. "Do you cook for all your maids?"
He pauses, halfway to the sink. Then he glances at you, a slow grin spreading across his mouth. "You're barely a maid."
"Excuse me?"
He shrugs again, that same lazy charm. "Have you seen the state of the guest bathroom?"
You laugh—actually laugh, the sound startling even to you but you catch yourself wondering why you're not offended he just insulted your cleaning skills. You watch his smile grow wider and somehow, in the scent of sautéing herbs and low music playing from the speaker he must've turned on when you weren't looking, it feels normal. Almost. Except not at all. Because when he sets the plate down in front of you, you look up to thank him—and he's already watching you. Eyes soft and focused.
And for the first time all day, your chest doesn't feel so tight.
You dig in and it's stupidly delicious, making your eyes go wide again, mouth still full. "Okay.
That's insane."
Heeseung chuckles, taking a bite of his own.
You point your fork at him. "You made this? Just now?"
He nods, watching you intently. It doesn't take long before the plates are empty—yours cleaned down to the sauce, his barely touched—and there's music playing from somewhere in the house, something soft and unfamiliar, all instrumentals and quiet piano.
You're both still sitting at the counter, opposite ends, your elbows propped up, legs curled beneath the stool. He's lounging with his long body twisted toward you, shirt sleeves rolled up, one hand holding a wine glass he hasn't taken a sip from yet.
The conversation has slowed into something looser now—easier. He asked what books you've been reading lately. You asked if he's always this good at cooking. He pretended to be modest and then very much wasn't.
And then you ask, "Why every day?"
He looks at you. "Why did you suddenly want me to come clean every day?" There's a beat of silence. Heeseung's gaze drops to the rim of his glass, the edge of his thumb skimming around it once, twice.
"When I saw your note," he says finally, voice lower now, "I didn't know what to do with it." He lifts his eyes, meets yours.
"I knew you weren't going to come again until the day after next. And it made me... restless. Waiting for a reply. Not being able to ask."
You inhale, slow and careful.
"And then I read your journal."
You stiffen a little, but he doesn't apologize. He doesn't even flinch.
"I didn't read all of it," he adds, leaning forward, closer. "I swear. Just some pages. A few entries. And one poem."
You stare at him.
He sets the glass down. Both elbows on the counter now. His fingers lace together.
"I read this line—" he begins, eyes on yours, "Your silence filled the house louder than your voice ever did."
You're stunned like your brain can't comprehend he's reciting your poem word for word.
He doesn't even blink. "I memorized the gaps in your sentences like scripture. I waited for the ending, but all you left was air."
Your mouth opens—just barely—but you can't speak.
"There's still a teacup on the windowsill. There's still a sweater on the hook. There's still a ghost in the shape of you that lives in the room where you never said goodbye."
You whisper the final two lines without thinking.
"And I still set the table for two, like a fool. Like you might remember that you left me starving."
His lips part—just slightly. Your voice had gone soft at the end, cracking a little, like it didn't want to be said out loud. And maybe it didn't. Maybe it never was.
You didn't even think it was that good. You wrote it half-asleep. You'd forgotten you even. "I needed to know," he says, not looking away, "who could write something like that."
You're quiet for a long time. "You shouldn't have read it."
"I know."
"I didn't write it for anyone to—"
"I know," he says again, voice quiet now. "But I couldn't help it. I wanted to meet the person behind it. I wanted to see if you'd look at me the way your words did."
The room is suddenly very still.
You don't know what to say. You don't know if there's even language for the way your body is reacting. There's heat in your throat, under your skin, behind your ribs. You should leave. You really should but instead you ask, "Do I?"
His brow creases. "Do you what?"
"Do I look at you that way?"
He doesn't answer your question, not with words anyway. Just studies you with that same unreadable stare, something flickering behind his eyes that makes it hard to breathe.
And then, as if someone's pressed fast-forward on the moment, he shifts his weight back and clears his throat softly. "Do you play any instruments?" he asks, voice casual, like he didn't just memorize one of the most vulnerable things you've ever written.
You blink. "What?"
He shrugs, gaze dropping to the counter. "You write. I assumed you like music."
"I do," you say carefully. "I like listening more than anything. I used to sing."
He hums, smiling faintly. "Used to?"
You sigh, deflecting. "It's different when people are watching. When you're older. The recorder was more forgiving."
That gets a real laugh out of him. He tilts his head, grinning. "The recorder?"
"Yes, and I was a prodigy. First chair in third grade." You press a hand to your chest dramatically. "The youngest to ever play Hot Cross Buns with such emotional depth."
He snorts and leans closer like he's about to say something else, but the next thing you know, he's not across the counter anymore—he's beside you.
You don't know exactly when he moved, maybe it was when he stood up from the stool to put the plates in the sink, still laughing about the recorder joke.
His elbow brushes yours. His shoulder is an inch from yours. You feel his presence like heat—radiating and dangerous in the best possible way.
And somehow, you're still laughing. You're still talking about childhood instruments and music you like and whether jazz is romantic or just sad in a pretty way. He teases you for not knowing any Miles Davis and you tease him back for quoting poetry like a teenage girl with a Tumblr account.
It's light. Easy. It's so different from the static in the air earlier this week, from the careful distance you both tried to maintain. But now...
Now his hand brushes the counter beside yours. And your breathing changes. And the silence feels like a held breath.
You don't look at each other—you're still talking, kind of. But your voices are softer now. Lower. A little slower.
And then it happens.
Your eyes meet.
His face tilts just slightly toward yours, making your breath catch.
His hand twitches like he wants to reach for you and doesn't. His eyes drop to your lips. He leans in, just a little—just enough that the space between you crackles—and you feel yourself tilting too, breath hitching, mouth parting.
And then he pulls back, all too quick and 
sudden. He clears his throat, looks away, stepping back so abruptly he almost knocks over the stool that was next to you.
You flinch at the sound.
"I—" he starts, then shakes his head, jaw tight. "You should go."
Your stomach drops.
"I didn't mean to—" he breathes out, pinching the bridge of his nose. "You don't have to come tomorrow. Go to your class. I'll tell your manager."
You stay frozen for a second, eyes wide, lips still tingling with something that didn't happen.
And then you nod, slow. Trying not to show how much you're shaking. "Okay."
He doesn't say anything else.
You leave quietly.
But your pulse pounds in your ears all the way home and in the haze of it all you don't take the bus home.
You don't want the rush of it—the closed windows and stale air and elbows brushing yours. You want air, real air, the kind that cools your skin and cuts through the confusion curling heavy in your chest. The heels of your sneakers hit the sidewalk harder than usual. You don't notice until your toes ache.
You can still feel it. The almost of his mouth on yours. His voice whispering poetry that used to belong to no one but you. The way he looked at you right before he pulled back—like he could drown and not care.
You don't realize how far you've walked until your phone rings, sharp in the quiet. You check the screen and it's Cee. You sigh, thumb swiping across the glass.
"Hello?"
"Hey. Where are you right now?"
You blink. "Uh... on my way home. I finished cleaning—he told me not to come tomorrow, so—"
"Yeah, well, change of plans," he cuts in, voice tight, clipped. "He called. Wants you in tomorrow."
You stop walking. "What?"
"That's what I said. Twenty minutes ago, he told me you weren't coming. Five minutes ago, he said make sure you do."
Your grip tightens around your phone. You glance down at the pavement, cracked and worn, your shadow stretched long in the streetlight. "That... doesn't make sense."
"Welcome to my fucking week."
You don't know what to say. You try to remember exactly how he said it. You don't have to come tomorrow. You can take your class.
He said it like a kindness. Like a favor.
Or maybe—maybe it was a trick. A test. Maybe you failed.
The line is quiet for a moment. Then, softer—softer than you're used to from him, like he has to chew it first before he can let it out—your manager says:
"Hey. Is everything okay over there?"
Your breath catches.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean..." A pause. "He hasn't done anything weird, right? Or tried something? You'd tell me, yeah?"
You blink again, hard. It feels like stepping off a curb you didn't see. Your lips part, your heart kicks—because no, he hasn't. But he almost did and you're starting to think maybe it would've been fine if he did. Maybe it would've been more than fine.
"No," you say quickly. "Nothing like that. He's... he's not like that."
"You sure?"
"Yes." You don't hesitate. "I don't want to quit."
There's silence on the line. You can hear him exhale.
"Alright," he says finally. "You're there again at ten. Don't be late."
You nod, even though he can't see you. "Okay."
He hangs up.
You just stand there. A low breeze rustles through the trees, brushes cool fingers against your neck.
He asked for you. After almost kissing you and pulling away—after telling you not to come tomorrow—he called and asked for you. Your pulse flickers hot beneath your skin as your mind raced with questions.
Was he testing you?
Did he think you wouldn't come back?
You suddenly realize your mouth is dry, your throat tight. The stars feel too bright above you. Your phone buzzes in your palm, a silent reminder that something has shifted, again.
And for better or worse, you'll be seeing him tomorrow.
You don't even bother to take your shoes off when you get in the door.
The front door slams behind you harder than you mean it to, and Jiyoon—sweet, perceptive, too-curious Jiyoon—is immediately shouting from the kitchen, "Is that you? Are you okay? You've been gone forever, I was about to—"
"I'm fine!" you yell back, already halfway down the hall. Your voice cracks halfway through the word. You don't even try to fix it.
"Wait—" Jiyoon appears around the corner, wooden spoon still in hand, some ridiculous song playing from the speaker behind her. "Wait, wait, what happened? Did you see him again?"
You keep walking.
"Did he—?"
"I'm fine," you repeat, softer this time but not gentler. "He said I don't have to come in tomorrow, so I'll probably go to my class."
"Oh my god, what does that mean?" she laughs, stepping after you. "Did you finally tell him off or did he—?"
"I'm tired, Jiyoon," you mumble, hand on your doorknob. "So tired."
She crosses her arms. "You look like you just made out with someone in a Jane Austen novel."
Your face goes hot.
"I love you," you say, deadpan. "But I need to be alone right now."
She gasps dramatically, "You're hiding something! You always say I love you when you're hiding something—"
You shut the door in her face.
Lock it.
Lean back against it.
Your heart is still thudding too loud in your ears.
You sink down to the floor, journal already in your hands before you even realize you've moved. Your fingers tremble when you unscrew the cap of your pen. You press it to the page.
And for a moment, you just sit there, not even writing.
Just breathing.
You write, He said I write beautifully.
Then, slower, He said he felt restless about not getting a response.
And then, He pulled away.
The ink smudges beneath your fingers. You don't wipe it away. You just keep writing, your handwriting more frantic than usual, trailing across the page in swooping spirals and crooked curves. You write about the way he looked at you—so real and intense it felt like it burned. About how close he was, how you could feel the heat of him.
About the poem.
How he remembered every word.
How you finished it together.
And when you're done, you stare at the page—like maybe it'll give you answers. Like maybe it'll tell you what it means when a man like Heeseung tells you not to come, then calls your manager like he can't bear not seeing you.
You close your journal.
And press it to your chest.
You crawl into bed, still in your jeans, feet hanging off the edge, journal clutched to your chest like a heartbeat you don't trust to stay steady on its own.
It takes everything in you to peel yourself away, toss the journal aside, and dig out your laptop from where it's tangled in yesterday's laundry on the floor. You log into your evening class with exactly thirty seconds to spare, camera off, mic muted, chin propped against the heel of your palm.
The professor's voice starts droning through your headphones—soft, monotone, familiar—and for a second you think maybe you can do this.
And then your eyelids get heavy.
You blink hard.
You scribble your name into the attendance chat and pretend like you're absorbing something, anything, while your mind floats right back to—
That linen shirt hanging open just enough to see his collarbones. His voice, low and steady, reciting your words back to you like scripture. The smell of garlic and rosemary from his cooking still clinging to your hair. The way he moved closer without you even realizing. The moment before the kiss that never happened—the way your heart caught on the edge of it.
You shake your head violently, try to refocus. The slide on your screen says something about semiotic theory. You don't know what that means. You don't care what that means.
You're so screwed.
Your professor's voice fades into a low buzz, and you press your palm to your cheek harder, like maybe pressure can keep you conscious. It can't.
The laptop screen glares into your face. The chat scrolls with questions you don't have the energy to fake-read. You close your eyes just for a second.
You tell yourself it's only for a second.
Just one.
Just—
You jolt awake six minutes later to your professor asking, "And how might this apply to authorial intent, Y/N?"
You blink, brain empty.
You type in the chat: Sorry, my mic's not working.
And you thank every god that ever existed for mute buttons.
*•*•*
You find yourself hovering just outside the penthouse door, hesitating.
Your fingers are curled in a loose fist, suspended midair like they've forgotten how to move. You've stood in this exact spot every day for about a week now, but this time—this time you're unsure. The same polished floor under your shoes, the same towering door with its sleek gold handle and silent weight, but something about today feels different. You feel different.
You almost turn around.
Almost.
But then—voices. Muffled, low but distinct, curling around the edges of the thick door.
You lean in without meaning to, breath held as if your body knows this is a moment you're not meant to be part of. You recognize his voice first, Heeseung's—light, teasing, a tone you've come to know well, though it still unsettles you how easily it affects you. The other voice is lower, older maybe, with clipped words and a sternness that makes your stomach tighten. It must be the doctor from the other day.
"No," the doctor says, firm and quiet. "Now isn't the time to have a new person around every day. You know that."
There's a pause. You hear something creak—maybe a chair.
"It's fine," Heeseung replies, far too casually. "Nothing's happened. She's just cleaning. It's fine."
"She's not just cleaning."
There's silence. A long one. And then—Heeseung's voice again, softer. "Maybe she's good for me."
You freeze. You don't know what they're talking about exactly, not in full, but the heat that rushes to your face is impossible to fight. Good for him? What the hell does that mean? And why does it make your chest feel like it's caving in? Before you can hear anything else, the door swings open, making you stumble back just in time, blinking up at the man who steps through—tall, with sharp eyes that land on you and skim over every inch of your body like you're being scanned. He doesn't say hello, he doesn't smile just like last time. Instead, he mutters something—so low you barely catch it but the edge is there, sharp enough to wound. Something about "distractions" and "too young" and "another mistake."
You step aside without responding, your mouth suddenly too dry to speak. He walks past you with a slight shake of his head and a long sigh, like your very existence is a burden.
And then—
"Didn't think you'd come."
You turn back around.
Heeseung's standing in the doorway, barefoot again, hair still damp like he just showered, dressed in a loose gray shirt and soft black pants that cling to his hips in a way that makes your head fog. He's smiling—nothing too wide, just soft, like a secret meant only for you. Like he's genuinely happy to see you.
You open your mouth to say something, anything—but he's already speaking again.
"About yesterday," he says, stepping aside so you can walk in. "I'm sorry. I overstepped."
And the whiplash? It's instant. Because wasn't he the one who told you not to come today? All quiet and serious and guilt-stricken after nearly kissing you in his kitchen? Now he's soft again, familiar again, and it throws you completely off.
"You don't need to apologize," you say quickly, almost defensively, as you walk inside.
"I do," he says, just as fast. "I really—"
"No, Heeseung." You stop and turn to face him, heart in your throat. "You really don't need to apologize."
He opens his mouth again, brows furrowing, about to insist—but your voice cuts through the air before you can stop yourself.
Quiet. Barely a whisper.
"You didn't have to stop either."
Silence, all heavy and immediate. Heeseung just stares at you. Still and looking stunned. His lips parted like he wants to speak but the words haven't caught up to his brain. His eyes search your face slowly, like he's not sure if he heard you right—or if you meant to say it out loud.
And maybe you didn't.
But you did.
And there's no taking it back.
The door clicks shut behind you before you can even remember stepping inside.
Heeseung doesn't move at first. Just stares at you like he's not entirely sure you're real. Like maybe he conjured you up somehow. His eyes stay on your mouth a little too long, and you try not to notice the way his chest rises and falls, slow and controlled, as if he's reminding himself how to breathe.
Then you say it again. Softer this time.
"You didn't have to stop."
It hangs in the air between you. Heavy, reckless and unapologetic.
Heeseung blinks once. His expression doesn't change, but something in his eyes shutters. He exhales through his nose—shaky—and drags a hand through his hair, the curls still slightly messy from sleep or stress or something in between.
"That's inappropriate," he says, not unkindly. More like he's trying to draw a boundary he doesn't even believe in.
And the words sting. Maybe more than they should. Maybe because you were just beginning to feel something real stirring between the two of you—something outside of your job, your journal, your blurring lines. You freeze. Your mouth opens but nothing comes out at first, and it's too late anyway. He's already turning from you.
The confused hurt in your eyes stops him in his tracks, but only for a second. He looks back at you—and really looks. Something passes behind his eyes, quiet and aching. Regret maybe or worse, restraint. You watch his jaw flex, as if he's chewing on something bitter, swallowing all the things he'll never allow himself to say.
Then he's stepping away. A slow, deliberate retreat. His footsteps are soft against the stairs as he disappears up them without another word.
And just like that, you're alone. Again.
The silence is incredibly deafening.
Your hands are still trembling.
They have been ever since you left his place. You could barely wipe the kitchen counters without your fingers missing the edge. The dishes were spotless before you even realized you'd scrubbed them twice. Your head was everywhere but here, rerunning that moment—that look in his eyes, the cold withdrawal of his body after your quiet, desperate confession.
And he never came back down.
You didn't know what you expected, but it wasn't this.
The day drags, and when the clock finally blinks 4:00, you practically flee. Your phone's already to your ear by the time you hit the elevator.
"I can't do this anymore," you say as soon as Cee picks up.
He sounds startled. "Do what? Are you—what happened? Are you okay?"
"Nothing happened. I just—" You press your fingers to your temple. The weight of everything suddenly lands all at once. "I don't want to clean for him anymore."
He's quiet for a second. Then, softer, "Did he do something?"
"No. I just..." You sigh. "It's better this way."
And you think that's the end of it.
But the second you step into the building's reception, the front desk clerk—neatly pressed shirt, neutral expression, his name tag slightly askew—glances up from his computer. "Miss," he says, "Mr. Lee is asking for you upstairs."
You freeze.
Your mouth goes dry. "I—I was just up there."
He nods once, polite. "He asked me to let you know."
You hesitate.
Everything inside you says don't go. That this is how it always begins—with soft invitations and good intentions and doors that don't close fast enough behind you.
But your feet are already moving.
The elevator ride is silent, save the rush of your pulse in your ears. And when you push the door open, Heeseung is there, leaning against the kitchen counter, arms crossed. Waiting.
You can't read his expression.
"I figured you'd quit," he says. Not accusing. Not even upset. Just matter-of-fact, like he'd already prepared for it.
"I am," you say. "I think it's for the best."
There's a beat.
"I don't want that."
You scoff before you can help it, stepping inside, letting the door close behind you with a soft hiss. "I'm not even sure you know what you want."
You don't even realize you're walking until you're standing in front of him, so close you could count the lashes framing his eyes if you weren't too scared to look directly into them. There's something in his face—some falter in his composure—that makes your chest feel too tight.
He doesn't move.
So you do.
Your fingers curl into fists at your sides, your heart hammers, and then—you're kissing him.
It's a mess of a thing. Sudden. Brash. Tipped forward on hope and recklessness. Your lips crash into his like a question you don't want answered and—
Nothing.
He doesn't move.
Your lips are on his, but he's frozen. Unresponsive.
The rejection burns so fast it chokes you, and you start to pull back, humiliated—but something in you makes you whisper to him, "Please," you almost sound broken. "Please kiss me back, Heeseung."
That's all it takes.
The air leaves his lungs like he's been sucker-punched. His hands are on your face instantly, his mouth catching yours like he's been starving for it. Like the moment he tasted you, he remembered how badly he wanted.
And this time, he answers the question
His mouth is on yours like he's finally allowed himself to breathe. You're not sure who moves first after that—him or you—but the space between you disappears completely. His hands are in your hair, on your waist, gripping your hips like he needs the reminder that you're real and here and kissing him back just as desperately.
And when he pulls away to look at you—face flushed, eyes dark and confused—you whisper again, barely audible, "Heeseung..."
That does it for him because you can swear you see the moment something in him breaks. Suddenly he's not hesitating anymore, like the sound of your voice cracked through whatever restraint he'd been clinging to, and now it was all unraveling.
He's swallowing the soft sounds you make, capturing every gasp, every whimper, like he needs to devour them, and his mouth is hot and insistent as it trails down your jaw, your neck, his teeth grazing the delicate skin like he's trying to mark the moment there.
You gasp when he lifts you without warning, your thighs instinctively wrapping around his waist, your arms around his neck. You can feel his heartbeat through his shirt. It's erratic—wild—matching yours nearly beat for beat.
He sets you down on the kitchen counter like you weigh nothing, the cool marble biting at the backs of your thighs through your jeans. His lips return to yours before they begin their descent again, brushing over your collarbone, down the slope of your chest. His fingers find the hem of your top and pause, glancing up, breath hitching.
You nod.
That's all he needs.
He peels it off gently—too gently for the look in his eyes—and when your bra joins the growing pile of fabric, he's silent for a second. Just watching you. Then he exhales something like a curse and leans in, pressing slow, reverent kisses down your sternum, the curve of your breasts, dragging his teeth lightly, sucking your nipple into his mouth, making you shiver and arch into him.
Every time you whimper, he presses closer.
Every time you moan, he groans softly against your skin, like your sounds undo him.
And just when you think your legs might give out from how tightly your body is wound, he lifts you again. Not onto the floor—but down, off the counter, and turns you gently, pressing you forward. You gasp softly as your hands meet the marble again, your heart stuttering.
Your jeans are tugged down with unhurried hands. Your underwear follows. You're so exposed. Breathless. And behind you, Heeseung lets out a shaky breath that sounds almost like a prayer.
One of his hands smooths over your lower back. The other grips your hip. "God forgive me," he whispers.
You don't know how to stay quiet—not when his mouth is trailing behind you, kissing the backs of your thighs, the curve of you, everywhere—and when he finally leans in, when you feel the first sweep of his tongue, your entire body jolts forward like he's short-circuited something deep inside you.
"Heeseung—" It leaves your mouth like a sob.
He groans in response, tightening his grip around your thighs, but his pace doesn't falter.
And all you can do is press your cheek against the cool counter, eyes fluttering shut, biting down on your own hand as he ruins you slowly.
Intimately.
He watches you unravel with so much intensity from beneath you, it's like he's trying to imprint every detail into memory. His tongue maps out every inch of you, teasing and tasting places you never realized could make you feel this way—until he finds your clit again. Instinct takes over; your hips roll down against his mouth, and he responds with a low hum, gripping your thighs to hold them open just enough to tilt his head and drag his tongue lower once more. "Spread your legs for me baby" He whispers it in a way that has you thinking you'll do anything he says, as long as he says it in that voice.
Suddenly and surprisingly, he shoves his tongue deep inside you while using his fingers to rub tight circles against your clit. "Hee—Ah!" You're moaning and whimpering so uncontrollably, the whole thing has your legs trembling where you're stood. You're convinced if he wasn't holding you up himself you'll collapse from the pleasure and pressure of it all.
His tongue is incredibly relentless, slurping you up, not even caring that he's drooling down his chin with your essence, "Wait! W-Wait!" You cry out suddenly.
"What? What? What's wrong? Did I hu—" His words cut through to you as he gets up off his knees where he was, but you're cutting him off and pulling him for another deep kiss, hopping yourself up on the counter again. Heeseung kisses you back like he's starving—like you're the first thing he's ever been allowed to want.
Your hands are in motion before you can think. Clumsy, eager, pulling his shirt halfway out from where it's tucked into his sweats, feeling the heat of his stomach beneath your palms. You moan into his mouth and his hands squeeze your thighs in response, hard enough to leave a mark.
He doesn't stop you when your fingers find the waistband of his sweatpants. If anything, he kisses you harder. His tongue sweeps into your mouth like he owns it—owns you—and you're letting him. Begging for more.
Your hands are shaking when you fumble at the button of his slacks, but you manage to get it undone, your fingers brushing the trail of skin that dips below the waistband. Heeseung lets out a sharp, broken sound against your mouth—fuck—his head tipping forward, forehead resting against yours as you palm him through the fabric.
You weren't ready for how hard and heavy he would be in your hand. It was like the length of him just went on and on.
You feel the twitch beneath your palm and gasp, and his breath stutters like he's seconds from losing it.
"Jesus—" heeseung grits, his voice deep and wrecked. His head tips back, neck exposed, throat bobbing, you've never seen someone come undone like this.
He's panting now, hips shifting forward like he needs the friction, like your hand is the only thing anchoring him.
"Is this okay?" you whisper, breathless, your voice barely steady as you trace him again, bolder this time.
His eyes find yours, blown wide and unreadable, lips parted. "You're gonna kill me," he breathes, but he nods. "Don't stop. Please take it out, please."
Your hand moves again, more confidently now, doing as he says, and his mouth crashes into yours mid-moan—swallowing it whole, like he can't bear the sound of his own unraveling.
And when he groans into you, deep and guttural and feral, you feel it between your legs—hot and pulsing and near unbearable.
He grips your hips like he's trying to anchor himself—like you're the only thing holding him together. He's dragging you to the edge of the counter and pinning your hand behind you, it has you feeling dizzy—the way he has you pinned there, at his mercy.
Before you can pull away to look down at where you have your hand wrapped around him, he's picking you up off the counter yet again, carrying you and setting you down on the couch, ever so gently.
Heeseung is panting into your mouth, your bodies pressed flush—his chest against yours, your legs wrapped around his waist. The fabric between you is suffocating. His sweats are halfway down his hips, your jeans are already abandoned on the kitchen floor, along with your panties, your composure, and any shred of dignity you once clung to when it came to him.
He's got you caged between his body and the couch. One arm braced beside your head, the other skimming down your side until his fingers are slipping between your legs again. You jolt, gasping against his lips, forehead pressed to his as his fingers slide through the mess he's made of you.
"Fuck—" you whisper, clutching at the back of his neck.
"So wet for me," he murmurs, his voice nothing but gravel and smoke, his thumb teasing your clit in slow, deliberate circles that make your spine curl. "You're perfect like this...I knew you'd come back."
You moan again, louder, desperate, rocking against his hand—your whole body begging for him.
His mouth finds yours again, kisses sloppier now, and then he's gripping himself, lining up with your entrance, breath hot and uneven against your cheek.
And then—
"Rina," he breathes.
You freeze for half a second.
It's soft—tender as a whispered prayer, effortless as a breath, a name escaping his lips before he even realizes it.
But your brain doesn't quite catch it—not fully. You're too far gone. Too overwhelmed by the stretch of him nudging at your entrance, by the unbearable heat of his body, the quiet, feral groan rumbling from his chest.
You blink, dazed. "What...?"
But the next second, he's pushing in.
And everything else disappears.
Your body arches, mouth falling open around a choked cry as he fills you in one slow, devastating thrust.
The stretch burns in the best way, and Heeseung moans something guttural, animalistic, like the moment he's inside you he's forgotten his own name too.
"So tight," he groans, nuzzling into the crook of your neck as he holds himself there, buried to the hilt. "Fucking heaven."
Your fingers claw at his back, your mouth finding the shell of his ear.
"Heeseung—move. Please—"
He pulls back, just enough to slam into you again, and you swear the stars tilt. His rhythm is brutal, relentless, every thrust stealing the breath from your lungs, and you're sobbing now—moaning into his mouth like you've lost your mind. Maybe you have.
Maybe he has.
Because he's whispering things you can't quite understand—fragmented pieces of something almost sweet, almost unhinged.
"My perfect girl... only mine... waited so long—so long—Rina..."
You hear it again. Clearer now, but you're too gone to stop. Too full of him to question it. Your body writhes beneath his like it's what it was made for—like he's been carved into your DNA.
And you don't know what he means but something about the way he's holding you—possessive, reverent, frantic like he'll die without you—sends a chill up your spine even as you're unraveling around him.
Where they meet—the madness and the need—you don't know where you end and he begins. But you're already lifting your hips to meet his just to chase your high. You're pretty sure you're drooling now and by the way he looks down at you a smiles you know he likes what he seeing "You're so beautiful" "So tight wrapped aroun—" He keeps silencing himself with strangled moans, pulling back and sitting up, too overwhelmed to even remember he hasn't apologized for already being on the edge.
"I'm gonna c—" "Oh fuck fuck fuuuuckkk" He drawls on and on, you can feel your release coming too, in fact it almost feel like you're going to pee. "Don't stop! Heeseung! Fuck!" You moan loudly, yanking him down into a sloppy kiss before pushing his hips back, his cock slipping wet and twitching from your cunt. Without pause, your fingers find your clit, working it in savage, relentless circles, each one followed by a sharp slap that makes your thighs jolt. "Fuck—shit!" you cry out, body arching as a hot stream shoots from you, splattering across his stomach and chest.
His breath catches—eyes blown wide, chest heaving—watching you lose control all over him "You're so sexy". You haven't even caught your breath when he suddenly takes over again, letting the mess spill from you as if your trembling doesn't matter, pushing you down and driving himself deep into the pulsing aftermath still rippling through your body.
"Cum on my cock again, please" "Need you to, Rina—Fuck! I'm so close!" He's mumbling half incoherent half desperate and your overstimulated self doesn't seem to hear the alarm bells ringing in your head at the name he just called you again.  You're already on the brink again, trembling and aching for it, and when it finally crashes through you, it's because Heeseung drags it out with no mercy. He pulls out, cock dripping, and fists it furiously as he paints your stomach—but he doesn't let your cunt stay empty. Two fingers slam back into your soaked hole, curling deep and fast, forcing you to squirt all over his wrist as he talks you through it with a low, filthy grin.
You're both trembling.
Sweaty skin pressed to sweaty skin. Harsh breathing. The deep, ragged quiet of two people who forgot where they were, who they were, what any of this even meant. He slumps forward, collapsing into you with a half-groan, half-laugh, and you let your fingers drift up his spine, your body humming with aftershocks.
You don't say anything and neither does he, not for a long, long moment.
Then he pushes up, slowly, gently—his hands sliding beneath your thighs as he lifts you off the couch. You whimper softly from the sensitivity, clinging to his shoulders.
"Come on," he says, voice raw and low. "Shower."
Your limbs feel like water, but you nod, letting him carry you. He walks the both of you to the massive bathroom like you weigh nothing—like you're still something precious in his arms—and sets you down on the warm tile floor. The shower clicks on, hot water spraying against his hand as he checks the temperature, then guides you under it with him.
The moment the water hits you, you shiver—more from the way he's looking at you than the heat. His gaze doesn't drop once. Not when he's rubbing gentle soap over your skin, not when he's rinsing between your legs with careful fingers, not when he presses a kiss to your shoulder like an apology he's too afraid to say aloud.
He doesn't speak until you're both out, towel-wrapped and damp.
"You okay?" he asks quietly, toweling off your hair with surprising tenderness.
You nod. And you don't stop him when he pulls one of his T-shirts over your head—soft and oversized, falling to your mid-thigh. You don't stop him when he pulls on a pair of boxers for you either, or when he leads you to the guest bedroom, the sheets cool and clean beneath your bare legs as you crawl under them.
He climbs in next to you, his body warm beside yours, and without a word, he pulls you close, wrapping an arm around your waist like it's muscle memory.
There's no more heat. No more tension. Just his heartbeat against your back, his breath slow and steady in your ear and you fall asleep like that, in his clothes, in his bed, in his arms. Not thining about the name he whispered.
*•*•*
You wake up before Heeseung does.
There's no buzzing alarm, no sunlight breaking through the blackout curtains, but your body jolts upright anyway—like your soul remembered what your mind didn't.
Panic grips you first.
Jiyoon. She's definitely called. Probably texted. Maybe even filed a missing person's report.
You twist in the sheets, trying not to disturb the weight draped over your waist. Heeseung's arm. Heavy, possessive, warm. His hand is splayed over your hip like it belongs there.
You freeze. Your breath catches in your throat.
What did I do?
Your heart's racing as you carefully, carefully peel his arm off of you, shimmying toward the edge of the bed. You manage to get one leg off, then another, tiptoeing like a thief in the early morning hush—
"Why are you sneaking out?"
You squeak.
Spinning around, your hands instinctively fly to your chest, but you're still wearing his shirt. You breathe a little but then freeze again when you see him. Heeseung is propped up on one elbow, hair mussed, eyes half-lidded and heavy with sleep. His voice is low and scratchy—one of those voices that somehow sounds like velvet and gravel all at once.
You stare. And then it hits you—like a freight train right between the ribs. Everything he did to you. Every moan he pulled from your lips. The way he tasted. The way he touched you like you were something sacred and sinful at the same time. You gasp, clapping a hand over your mouth like you can trap the memory there.
His brow lifts just slightly, eyes crinkling with amusement. "What am I gonna do with you?" he mutters, flipping back onto the bed with a sigh, one arm flung over his eyes. "You're trouble."
"I have to go," you say quickly, eyes darting to the door. "My friend is probably freaking out, she didn't know where I was—"
"Okay," he murmurs, voice muffled beneath his forearm. "But can I get a kiss?" You blink, feeling your heart stutter. Then, slowly, you cross the room again, padding back to the side of the bed. His arm lowers just enough to watch you. When you lean down, brushing your lips to his, he hums—like he's been waiting for that exact moment.
But just as you try to pull away, he grabs you. You yelp, landing on top of him with a soft thud as his hands anchor you by the hips. "Heeseung—" He kisses you again and t's not a chaste goodbye kiss this time. It's deeper, hotter—his lips moving slow and sure against yours, like he has all the time in the world. His tongue licks into your mouth, and you melt against him without thinking, your fingers clutching the soft fabric of his T-shirt over his chest.
You whine into his mouth. "I have to go..." He nips at your bottom lip, soothing the sting with a soft kiss before pulling back just enough to breathe. "Come back," he whispers. "Tonight. Seven o'clock."
You're blinking at him, breathless. "To... clean?" He shakes his head once, lips twitching. "No. I'll cook." You can't help it. You smile. It's shy and warm and completely helpless. "Okay," you whisper.
He lets you go then, but not before placing one last kiss on your cheek, right beneath your eye. "Don't be late."
You close the door to the guest bedroom behind you, twisting the handle slowly so it doesn't make a sound, like he might stir just from the click, not that he could even be asleep again. Your heart's still thudding, though softer now, your body still warm from how he held you—not just last night, but moments ago. You feel him on your skin. Between your thighs. In your mouth, even. You pad into the hallway, feet silent against the floor, and the penthouse feels even bigger in the morning, stretching out wide and echoey. Sunlight slips in through the tall windows of the living room, golden and faint, catching dust in the air.
Your clothes are everywhere. A trail—your bra laying on the kitchen floor with your jeans close by, your shirt hanging from the edge of a barstool like some kind of white flag.
You sigh.
You gather them quickly, cradling the bundle to your chest. But when you unfold your shirt—well, what's left of it—you remember the exact moment he took it off, how he looked at you like you were some forbidden fruit he'd gone too long without, you hadn't even realized he had ripped it. It's unsalvageable.
So you just... don't put it on. You slip your bra back on, then shrug his black shirt over it. It swallows you, soft and warm from sleep. You wiggle into your jeans next, the ones he peeled off of you. Your hands tremble as you do the button up.
Last thing—your phone. You search the couch. Nothing. Under the cushions. Still nothing. You check the kitchen counter, the bar, even crouch down to peek under the sofa. "Come on, come on..." Then finally, mercifully, you spot it near the edge of the carpet, half-tucked under the dining chair. You dive for it like it's oxygen and fumble to unlock it.
Ten missed calls. Three voicemails. Twenty-two messages.
All from one name. You don't even get a word out when you hit call—Jiyoon answers on the first ring. "You bitch." You wince. "Oh my god," she cackles. "You bitch. Where were you? Don't tell me—no, no actually, tell me everything right now."
"Ji—"
"You slept with him, didn't you? You fucking whore. You got that psycho dick, didn't you?! Tell me. Was it good? Was it crazy?!"
You cover your face with your hand, crouching down behind the kitchen island like you're trying to hide from the embarrassment sinking into your bones. "I'm coming home," you say weakly, voice still raspy from sleep and... everything else.
"Oh," Jiyoon says, tone shifting slightly. "I'm not home right now. I'm covering a shift for my lazy coworker. But I'll be back later—wait, wait, is he still there? Are you still there? What's he doing?"
"Jiyoon."
"What?"
"Bye."
You hang up.
Still pink-faced and hot, you shove your phone in your pocket, tug on your sneakers, and walk to the elevator with your head ducked low—like the doors might open and the walls themselves would whisper what happened between them. You're not sure how to feel. Still floating. Still wrecked. But you know you'll be back by 7.
*•*•*
You unlock the door to your apartment with shaking fingers, pushing it open slowly like you might find the night before still waiting for you on the other side. But it's empty, cause there's no Heeseung here. No soft piano notes echoing from hidden corners. No whispered "be back by seven." Just your little apartment, lived-in and warm and smelling faintly of vanilla from the candle Jiyoon must've lit last night. You step inside, close the door behind you, and lean back against it for a second. Just to breathe. Your body aches so deliciously and shamefully. Your lips are sore. Your thighs. Your heart.
You change into something soft and oversized before dropping onto your desk chair and logging into your online class, the kind of class that requires so much effort to focus on even when you haven't just had... whatever that was. The screen lights up. A professor you don't care about is already talking, already droning on about something you're not registering. You blink at the slides. The bullet points. You try. Really, you do. But your brain?
It's busy. Because it won't stop showing you his face in the dark. The way he hovered over you, lips parted, skin burning hot against yours. The way he touched you like you were something he needed to know. Memorize.
The way he whispered—low and wrecked—"Rina." You flinch.
It hits you all at once. You'd been so caught up in the moment, too far gone to process it then. But now? Now it loops. The way he said it. Like a prayer. Like a confession. Rina.
Who the hell is Rina? You shift in your seat, open a new tab, and hesitate. Your heart is racing again—not the good kind this time, as your hands tremble over the keyboard. Then you type it in regardless,
Lee Heeseung Rina
The search bar blinks at you. You hit enter. And there it is.
The very first result is a glossy thumbnail from three years ago. Heeseung in an interview, seated on a sleek navy couch, wearing black slacks and a gray button up sweater and a white shirt beneath it. He's smiling. That breathtaking smile you've only seen a few times up close, so effortless and disarming. You click the video.
The host laughs and leans forward. "Come on, Heeseung. Everyone wants to know. Who's Rina?" Heeseung chuckles, mouth tugging up at one side. You sit a little straighter.
"She's my first love," he says. "And probably the only one I'll ever love like that." The crowd awwws and your heart cracks like glass under pressure, you have pause the video. So she was real. A real woman.Someone he loved so deeply he admitted it on camera—publicly, permanently. Your throat closes up. Your chest tightens. He called you that name. Did he think of her while he was—. You don't even finish the thought. Instead, you search harder. Scroll deeper. You need to know what she looks like. If you look like her. If this is some messed up ghost-of-an-ex situation.
Another video pops up—this one titled "Behind the Scenes | Seoul Symphony Ensemble (ft. Lee Heeseung)"
You click it. The footage is candid, grainy. Heeseung's younger here, maybe only twenty or twenty-one, still too beautiful for it to be fair. The camera follows him backstage as he leads a film crew through the dim corridors of a concert hall. Then he stops, turns to the camera. "Come here," he says with a quiet laugh, gesturing to the next room. "You have to meet her." The camera jostles slightly as they follow. Heeseung walks up to a sleek, glossy black grand piano and runs his fingers across the keys. "This is Rina," he says, like he's introducing a person. His voice is reverent. Almost loving. "She's been with me since I was thirteen. She's...kind of everything to me."
You freeze.
The camera zooms in slightly. Heeseung brushes dust from the piano's surface with his sleeve, smiling at it so softly it hurts. "She's my first love." You sit there, staring, mind blank and full all at once.
Rina's not a person.
Rina's a piano.
A fucking piano. A part of you wants to laugh at your delusion but you don't, instead you just sit there.  Eyes glued to the screen. To him. To the way he's speaking—not to the camera, not even to the crew—but to the piano, like it's something alive. Like it's someone he's missed. Someone he still longs for in the softest, most ruined parts of himself. And that name—Rina—sits different now in your head. Not like a rival. Not like someone he's still in love with. But like... a memory. A feeling. Something that made him whole when the world couldn't.
Rina is his piano.
You let the video run, sound turned low, just watching him—barely twenty two, still beautiful, still broken. The way he presses one key gently and listens. How he says, she's been with me since I was thirteen. How he adds, she's my first love like it's a secret and a confession all at once. Your heart folds in on itself. Because in a way it makes sense now. The way he said your name last night, the way he whispered Rina instead—like he couldn't tell the difference. Like in his mind, in that haze of need and obsession and closeness, you had become something sacred. Something he hadn't let himself love in years. Something he used to play like music. And he'd touched you the same way—with reverence and hunger, as if trying to figure out where you end and he begins. You press your palm to your chest, like maybe you can settle your heartbeat if you hold it hard enough.
He doesn't see you as a replacement. You're not her. But in that moment, you think he felt something he hadn't in a long time. Something pure. Something familiar. Something maybe even terrifying. Heeseung, in his fractured, beautiful, obsessive mind, didn't just mistake you for his piano, he associated the moment—you—with what he once felt when he played Rina. And maybe he's so far gone he doesn't even realize he did it. And maybe you should be scared, but all you feel is this deep, warm ache in your ribs that won't go away. You close the laptop, completely forgetting about your class, and press your fingers to your lips. They still tingle from kissing him and you feel your stomach turn with excitement for the night to come.
*•*•*
You hear it before you see her. The clatter of her keys on the counter. The heavy sigh. And then, sharp—like a bullet of disbelief,  "YOU BITCH." "OH MY GOD." You don't even turn. Just let your eyes flutter shut and mentally brace for it. "You absolute filthy little minx," Jiyoon hisses, storming into the hallway in her work flats and crumpled apron, "Don't even try to deny it—I know you did it." "I'm not denying anything," you mumble, turning slowly to face her. She's halfway through unzipping her jacket, eyes wide, expression scandalized.
Your entire face bursts into flames. "Jiyoon—" "Oh my God, you did sleep with him." She points at you like she's witnessing a war crime. "You have sex hair. You're literally glowing. What the hell is that shirt? Wait—don't tell me." She takes a dramatic step back. "Is that his shirt?" You tug the hem instinctively. "It's just... something I had to wear. Mine got—um. Ripped." She stares at you. Blinks once. Twice. Then screams. "Oh my GOD. He ripped your clothes off? That's—like—that's premium movie-level sexy violence."
You bury your face in your hands. "Please lower your voice." "You didn't even text me last night!" she cries. "Do you know how worried I was? I thought he locked you in a cage or something!"
"I was busy," you say, voice strangled. "You were BUSY getting ravenously destroyed," she says, flopping onto the couch like the dramatics are too heavy for her legs. "Okay. Tell me everything. Don't leave out any of the details. Did he talk? Was it intense? Slow burn? Did he like—say your name all rough and gravelly or was he like, all quiet and crazy about it?" You hesitate.
You want to tell her and you almost do, but something about that moment—about everything that happened last night, the hazy weight of his body pressed against yours, his breath in your ear, how he held you like you were a prayer and a ghost all at once—feels too delicate. Too personal. You can't even begin to explain the shift you felt inside yourself, let alone the strange ache in your chest when he said that name. You swallow, keeping your voice light. "It was... really good."
Jiyoon lifts a brow. "That's it? Good?" You shoot her a look. "I'm not giving you a full play-by-play." She gasps. "So it was insane." "I'm gonna be late," you deflect, brushing past her to grab your phone. "I told him I'd be there at seven." "Ugh. Seven is such a romantic time."
"What does that even mean?" "Like. Not too early, not too late. Right in the middle. Candlelight o'clock." She wiggles her eyebrows. "You gonna let him feed you and then fuck you again?""Jiyoon."
"You are. Oh my God. Are you shaving again or are we doing stubble and surrender tonight?" You groan. "I can't talk to you about this." "Yes, you can," she says, pulling her hair into a bun. "We signed a roommate agreement, remember? Emotional nudity clause." You smile despite yourself. "Just wish me luck, okay?" She softens then, eyes scanning your face. "You like him." You hesitate, fingers pausing on your necklace clasp. "I don't know what I feel," you say truthfully. "It's... fast. Messy." "You don't do messy."
"Exactly." Jiyoon walks over, squeezes your shoulder. "That shirt looks hot on you, by the way. Like dangerously I-was-just-fucked-by-a-mentally-ill-man hot." "Thanks, I think."
"Be safe. Don't let him tie you to anything unless there's a safe word. Call me if he tries to perform an exorcism." You laugh, heading for the bathroom door. "You're gonna fall for him," she calls behind you. "You already are, huh?" But you don't answer, because you don't know that yet, and if you do, you're not ready to say it out loud.
You check the time again when it's 6:38 PM. Your reflection in the bathroom mirror stares back at you—doe-eyed, glossed lips parted slightly, a tiny knot of nerves cinched beneath your ribs. You smooth your hands down your dress for the fifth time, whispering to yourself under your breath like it might change something. "Okay," you murmur. "Just dinner. It's just... dinner." With Heeseung. At his penthouse. In a dress you specifically picked to walk the very fine line between I wanted to look nice for you and I definitely didn't spend two hours trying on everything I own. A dress that clings at your waist and floats at your knees and makes you feel pretty but also exposed. Not in a bad way, just... in a way that makes your skin feel watched. Known.
You hesitate in the doorway, staring down the hallway toward the stairs. And then you groan. "Nope. No way I'm taking the bus." You can already see it—you standing sandwiched between strangers, one arm clutching the overhead bar, the other yanking at your skirt, trying not to breathe too loud. You can feel the wrinkles forming just thinking about it. You'd show up looking like a disheveled little sandwich and Heeseung—Heeseung with his white linen shirts and leather watchbands—would tilt his head and maybe smile and maybe not say anything, but you'd know. You open your phone and call a cab.
It feels ridiculous. Extravagant even. But the moment you sink into the backseat, cool leather beneath your thighs and the city lights blinking past your window like slow breaths, something quiet settles inside you. You take a long, shaky inhale. Heeseung's face comes to mind. The way he looked last night—flushed and breathless and so terribly hungry for you, like you were the first and last thing he'd ever wanted. The way he whispered your name. Except—it wasn't your name. Not the first time. Your fingers tighten slightly on your bag and you push the thought away. You already made peace with it—told yourself it didn't mean anything. Not really. You'd seen the videos. You know what Rina is. And in some strange, abstract way, you think maybe you understand what happened better than you should.
Maybe he sees things in fragments—maybe he feels things in them too. Maybe last night, you reminded him of something he loved once so deeply he carved a home for it in his bones. And maybe tonight, you want him to start carving space for you instead. You glance atthe time on your phone, 6:53. Your stomach flutters. Are you nervous?
God—yes. Your knees won't stop bouncing, and your fingers keep picking at the edge of your dress. But you're also... excited.You don't know what's waiting for you on the other side of this ride—don't know if dinner will be awkward or sweet or laced with something heavier—but it feels like something real. Something different. And that terrifies you. Because you've never been looked at the way he looked at you last night. Not like you were music.
The cab pulls up to the building. You pay with shaky hands, thank the driver too softly, and walk inside. The elevator ride is a blur of breath-holding. The ding at the top floor even sends a jolt through your chest. And then you're standing in front of his penthouse door, your hand hovering, not sure whether to knock or just—. It's not locked. The knob turns and you step inside, closing the door behind you with a soft click, and you're met with... silence. You take one hesitant step forward into the quiet space. It's too quiet. The air feels still in a way it didn't the last time you were here—when it was thick with the scent of his skin, his hands, your gasps and moans echoing off the walls like confessions. Now it's like the space is holding its breath again.
"Heeseung?" you call, your voice barely above a whisper. You glance at the clock on the wall, 7:01. You chew on your lip, glancing around. The kitchen looks untouched. There's no trace of movement, no clatter of pans or scent of dinner in the air. There's a single light on in the far corner by the bookshelves, casting golden shadows across the couch where he held you just hours ago, his mouth in your hair and his arms locked around your waist like he was afraid you'd disappear. You exhale softly. "Heeseung?" you try again, louder this time, taking cautious steps farther in. Still nothing.
And then it hits you—you don't even have his number. You came here like some wide-eyed idiot with your heart between your teeth, expecting him to just be there, waiting, arms outstretched. It hadn't occurred to you that he might not hear the door, or might be upstairs, or might have changed his mind entirely.
God. You sink down onto the arm of the couch and try not to panic. You won't text Jiyoon—not yet. She'd tease you mercilessly and then probably tell you to go snoop in case he was sleeping with other people or something absurd. You don't want to snoop. You just want to see him. You shift in your seat, smoothing your dress again, tugging at the edge of it and check the time again, 7:06. You blink, already feeling defeated and ready to leave but then a sharp loud sound echoes from upstairs that has you snapping your head towards the stairs. There's another thud—louder this time—followed by a crash that sends a sharp jolt through your chest. Something shattered. And then, unmistakably, screaming. Blood-curdling. Ragged. Like pain clawing itself out of a throat too raw to hold it anymore.
Your breath snags. Your heart kicks into high gear. Your body's moving before your mind can catch up, instinct overriding hesitation as you bolt through the living room, past the grand piano, toward the stairs. Breaking every rule you were given when you first started working here, but that's the last thing on your mind.
He's upstairs. That's him—him screaming.You take the stairs two at a time, heart pounding, fingers scrambling against the banister. When you reach the top, there's only one door that makes sense—tall and black, you sprint to it, chest heaving, and try the handle.
Locked.
Your fist slams against it before you can think. "Heeseung?!" There's no response—just another crash, something metallic this time, like a stand being thrown, maybe a chair. Your knuckles are pulsing against the wood. "Heeseung, open the door! Please!" Still no answer. Just a chorus of garbled words—frenzied, nonsensical, frantic.
"They changed the notes—don't you hear it? It's all wrong, out of key, they're inside the piano! Stop watching me! The rhythm's bleeding, I can't—" Another crash. "It's too loud in here, too loud in my head, make it stop!" Your blood runs cold. Something primal flickers inside you—panic morphing into something sharper, braver. You back up, brace your shoulder against the frame, and throw yourself forward.
Once. Twice—
CRACK.
The door flies open, and you stumble into the absolute chaos, the first thing you see is the floor, and at the center of it all; a piano or what's left of one. Splintered wood. Torn wires. Ivory keys cracked like teeth knocked from a skull. You recognize it instantly. Rina.
There more glass and splintered wood than floor beneath her. Crumpled sheet music. A chair lying on its side. Blood. Blood like paint streaked across the wooden floor, thin trails leading to—
Him. Heeseung.
Standing in the center of it all like a broken monument. There's a deep gash across his forearm, blood still dripping sluggishly onto his hand and down his knuckles. His chest rises and falls too fast, ribs pushing sharply beneath skin that gleams with sweat. His hair sticks to his face. His eyes—wide, unseeing, glazed with something far away and chaotic and terrifying—don't register you at first. He's breathing like he's drowning.
You try to speak, to talk to him, but your throat won't open. He moves before you can. Quick, jerky. Like his body's not entirely his own. He spins, stares at the wall like it's speaking to him, fingers twitching at his sides. "They changed the notes," he mutters. "They changed the fucking notes." His voice is shredded. Raw. Like he's been screaming for hours. Maybe he has. You take one step closer, and your heel lands on a snapped piano key. It clicks beneath your foot like a trigger. He whips around, eyes on you now, all wild, unhinged and unfocused. "Who are you?" he rasps.
You freeze. The question slices clean through you. Your mouth opens, but your voice won't come. Heeseung stares, pupils blown so wide you can barely see the brown. His hands curl and uncurl like he's not sure if he wants to reach for you or strangle you. "Who are you?" he repeats. "Why are you watching me? Are you one of them?"
Them? Your heart stutters. "Heeseung..." you whisper, finally finding your voice. "It's me." But he flinches like you've struck him. You take another step and watch as he instinctively steps back. "No," he whispers. "No—Rina? I'm so sorry. I hurt you. You were perfect and I ruined you. My perfect girl. Please forgive me." Your breath catches.
"It's okay, it's okay." You don't know where it comes from. Maybe instinct. Maybe desperation. Maybe the way his voice cracks like the word is a wound. "I forgive you," you say, voice steadier this time. "I came back for you." His mouth parts and his whole body stills. You can see the thought slotting into place behind his eyes, crooked and trembling and fragile. But it settles. "...Rina?" You nod. "I'm here."
He walks toward you slowly. So slow. Like every step might set him off again. And still, you don't move. His bloodied hand lifts, fingers brushing your cheek—his touch clumsy and too hard at first, like he doesn't remember how to be gentle. But then it softens. His palm cups your jaw, and he leans in so close his breath skates across your lips. "I knew you'd come back," he murmurs. Your throat tightens and swallow around the ache, allowing him to press his forehead against yours. "I'm here now."
"Don't leave," he breathes. "Please don't leave me again. The music stops when you're gone. It stops and I can't breathe, I can't—"
"I'm not going anywhere," you whisper. He leans back just enough to look at you. The way he's looking now—it breaks you, because there's no rage or wildness. Just pure, shivering exhaustion. He's unraveling at the seams, and you're the only thread keeping him together. "I want to play," he says softly. "Let me play you."
You nod. And when he tugs you toward the mangled piano, you follow. It's barely standing. The legs are cracked. One pedal's missing. The keys are uneven—some bloodied, some broken. It shouldn't work. It shouldn't sound. But he sits on the shattered bench, breath hitching, and gently pulls you onto his lap.
You settle there, straddling him, your dress bunching slightly against the rough edge of the wood. Your hands brace on his shoulders. His arms wrap around you, drawing you closer. And then—fingers trembling—Heeseung presses his hands to the keys. The sound is... haunting. Off. Warped. But he plays anyway. A melody, jagged and soft. A lullaby with broken bones. The piano cries beneath his touch, but he keeps playing. For you, because of you, it all makes your chest ache for him, you even feel your eyes sting. And all you can do is hold him, let him pour whatever's left of himself into the broken body of his piano—into you.
Because right now, in this room thick with blood and chaos and ghosts, you're the only thing anchoring him to earth. The music tumbles out of him in discordant bursts, crooked and aching like his mind, like his body—like whatever this is between you. And you swear, you'd let him play you forever. But then his fingers slip, not from the broken keys, but because your breath stutters against his jaw. He stills, drifting one hand away from the piano to find your waist instead, the other continues to play, the curve of your back—and then he's holding you so tight you feel the blood from his arm soak warm through your dress.
You don't flinch.
He tilts his face up, searching yours. Your lips part, not for words, but for the way his mouth captures yours the second you breathe in. It's so so desperate. A kiss that tastes like iron and sweat and the kind of madness that wants to be known, wants to be seen.
You whimper into him, clutching at the front of his shirt, and his hands are already moving—shaky, hurried, needing—grabbing at your dress, dragging it up your thighs as if he doesn't care it's stained now, doesn't care it's soft and new and something you wore for him.The keys beneath you clatter with each shift of your hips, and his fingers fumble at the zipper on your side like it's fighting him. He groans low in his throat, kissing you harder, tongue sliding hot against yours as if he's trying to crawl inside of you—trying to disappear there, to lose the noise in his head.
"You came back," he gasps against your mouth. "You really came back—" You nod, breathless, eyes wet, thighs tightening around his waist. "I told you I would." He tugs the dress down your shoulders, hands smeared with red, smearing it onto you, painting you with it. It sticks to your collarbones, your arms, a fever-warm trail of devotion and ruin, but you don't stop him.
He's kissing you like he needs this to survive, like he'll lose his mind all over again if you pull away. Your fingers thread through his hair, and he groans at the way you pull, his mouth moving from your lips to your neck, your jaw, your shoulder—biting, tasting his blood smeared there, claiming. You tremble. And then his hand is between your legs, cupping you through your panties, a low, reverent moan tearing from his chest when he feels the heat there. "For me," he mutters, delirious. "You're like this for me."
"Yes," you breathe, rolling your hips into his hand, nails clawing at his back through his shirt. "Only for you." He groans again, like the words unmake him.
Your dress is halfway down your body, straps hanging off your arms, and you're so tangled together that it's hard to tell whose limbs are whose. He continues kissing you then like a vow. Like salvation. And everything else—the broken piano, the screaming from earlier, the sharp pain in your back from the cracked lid—fades to nothing. The music stutters beneath you—sharp, erratic keystrokes like a hymn being pulled apart at the seams.
But he doesn't stop playing. Even as his bloody fingers slip over the ivories, even as his other hand bunches your dress up around your hips, even as you gasp into his mouth and his teeth catch your bottom lip hard enough to sting. You're still straddling him, thighs trembling on either side of his lap, and he's shifting beneath you like he can't get close enough, like the distance between your bodies is an insult to the devotion he's shaking with.
"Heeseung," you whisper, breath hitching as his hand slides between your legs, the fabric of your panties clinging to you wet and ruined. "Please—" "Shh," he hushes, mouth dragging down your neck, blood and spit slick on your skin. "It's okay, it's okay—I got you, baby, I got you—" His fingers tremble as he pushes the fabric aside, clumsy and rushed, and you flinch when his knuckles brush over you. He groans against your throat, hand gripping your hip like he might break it, like it's the only anchor he has.
"Fuck, you're so warm—" he pants, "—I missed you so much, I missed you—" You don't know if he's talking to you or to her, to Rina, to whatever memory he's tangled you up with—but you can't bring yourself to care. Not when he's freeing himself beneath you with frantic hands, moaning under his breath as he fumbles himself through his sweats, panting into your collarbone like he's on the verge of falling apart. And then he's there. Thick, flushed, already so hard it makes your head spin. He grips your thighs, pulling you up just enough—just enough to align—and then sinks you down onto him in one ragged, choking breath.
You cry out, clenching around him, thighs shaking. Heeseung's head snaps back, a guttural sound ripping from his throat, and his hands clamp down on your hips like he's afraid you'll vanish again. "Oh my God—" he gasps, "—move, baby, please, come on—come on—"
He's twitching inside you already, so sensitive, so overwhelmed, but he's begging for more. Encouraging you, pushing up into you while his hands guide your hips, while his fingers—still stained with his blood—return to the keys beneath him, pressing out that same broken melody. You try to move—hips rising, sinking—but it's messy. Desperate. Your thighs burn, your breath hitches, and your forehead presses to his as he whispers, "Just like that, just like that—don't stop—don't stop—" The piano groans beneath you both. His legs tremble. Your panties are barely hanging on, twisted and soaked, caught somewhere between you, and still—still—he keeps playing.
Keeps playing through the rise and fall of your bodies, through the wet slap of your hips, through the breathless moans and the ache and the madness. He's shaking beneath you. His mouth finds yours again, swallowing your sobs, blood smearing from his wrist to your waist as he holds you tighter—deeper—closer.
"I knew you'd come back," he whispers, forehead to yours. "You always come back to me." You can't answer. You can only cry out his name, again and again, as the notes beneath you unravel into chaos and crescendo Your fingers claw at his shoulders as you rock against him, pace faltering with every thick thrust. The bench groans beneath your bodies, protesting under the weight of it all, but you don't stop. Neither of you could if you tried.
His hands are all over you—up your back, into your hair, clawing at your waist like he doesn't know where to hold, just that he has to hold somewhere.
The piano is completely forgotten now. The keys he was so desperate to press—abandoned mid-chord, half-played notes frozen under bloodied fingertips. But Heeseung's mouth is moving and he's moaning something. At first it's a whisper, hoarse and uneven, barely above the wet sound of your bodies meeting again and again. But then—clearer, louder— "Y/N... oh my god, Y/N—" You halt for a second. Barely. Just long enough to catch your breath. To hear him. Your name—your name, not his pianos—spilling from his lips like prayer, like apology, like it's the only thing anchoring him to reality.
Heeseung's head drops to your shoulder, and he's panting your name again, so sweet and unguarded it nearly knocks the breath from your lungs. "Y/N," he gasps, "you feel so good, baby—fuck—so good—" It's like he sees you now. Really sees you. And his hands are softer now, less frantic, still trembling but reverent in how they hold you—his thumb brushing your waist, his other hand cradling your jaw as he lifts your face to his.
Your noses bump. His eyes search yours like he's never seen anything more precious. "It's you," he whispers, almost awed. "It's really you..."He leans in, kissing you like the world's finally slowed down, like he's finally returned to it. To you. And when you move again—hips grinding, slow now, deeper—he moans your name into your mouth, over and over like it's his undoing. Each syllable spills from him shakily, soaked with disbelief and want and something that almost sounds like worship.
Your hands find his cheeks, thumbs stroking where the dried tears have clung to his skin, and when you whisper his name back, soft and breathless, he shudders. Heeseung's forehead presses to yours. You feel him twitch inside you, thighs clenching around him as you both near that terrible, beautiful edge again, and he breathes your name one last time— "Y/N, I'm—fuck—I'm gonna cum, baby, please—stay with me—stay—" Your hips stutter. His hands seize. And then everything splinters—. Your name tears from his throat in a ragged moan, your own lips parted in soundless release as your body collapses forward, curling into his chest like instinct.
Heeseung's arms close around you immediately. One low on your spine, the other twisted into your hair, as if he can press you into him hard enough to keep you there forever. Your pulse throbs everywhere. Between your legs, in your throat, under your tongue. Heeseung is trembling beneath you, arms loose but shaking, chest heaving like he's run for miles and only now stopped to breathe.
He's still inside you. Still in you, cradled and connected and caught in the softness of what just happened. No piano. No ghosts. Just this.You shift slightly, just to catch your breath, and he shudders around you with a hoarse gasp. His head drops to your shoulder, face buried in the crook of your neck. You stay there a while. No words. No need. Just the sound of the wind against the high windows, the echo of your breathing, and the quiet creak of a broken piano bench holding two too-lost people.
Eventually, his fingers twitch against your waist. "Y/N," he breathes, voice scratchy and soft. You hum, stroking the sweaty strands of hair back from his temple. Your touch is gentle, slow, grounding. He lifts his head—eyes glassy, wide and wet around the edges. You watch them drop down, settle on the stains between you, the faint blood still smudged across his hands and chest. He catches your wrist.Brings your fingers—still trembling—to the mess of red streaked across his ribs. The open cuts from earlier have mostly clotted, but the wounds are still fresh, angry-looking, like they're still listening to the madness that tore them open. He presses your palm there, over his heart.
"This body..." he whispers, eyes still downcast. "It belongs to too many ghosts." Your chest tightens, but you don't pull away. Instead, your fingers spread gently over the damp skin of his chest, pressing softly, reverently. You guide his gaze up to meet yours. "It belongs to me tonight," you murmur, voice quiet but sure. "It's okay, Heeseung. I've got you."
He blinks hard and for a second, something in him flickers. Something soft. Almost boyish and safe. Then his forehead presses against yours again. He leans into the cradle of your hands like he's never been touched this way before—like he doesn't know what to do with it. "...Don't let go yet," he whispers. "I won't," you promise. "Not tonight." Heeseung's head is resting against yours, your hand still pressed to his chest, when he whispers it. So faint, it's nearly lost in your breathing.
"...Call her." You pull back a little, brushing your nose against his cheek. "Hm?" He blinks slowly, like the exhaustion is hitting him all at once. "Phone's somewhere here, on the shelf by the metronome. Just—tell her it's bad, she'll come." You stare back into his eyes cluelessly,
"My nurse".
You nod, slipping gently off his lap. He groans softly at the loss of you but doesn't stop you. Doesn't move at all, really—just tilts his head back against the edge of the bench, hair damp with blood sweat and tears. You find the phone where he said it would be, swipe up, and call the nurse. She picks up after one ring. You tell her to come and you don't have to say much more—she must be used to these calls by now. And as you're hanging up, you hear him say it behind you, low and soft, "Thanks... for coming upstairs."
You turn, heart squeezing. He's still sitting there, shirtless and smeared in blood, legs parted like he couldn't stand if he tried. But he's looking at you—really looking—and something about it makes your breath catch in your throat.
You walk over. Kiss his forehead. Then slip into the bathroom for towels, water, and cleaner. By the time the nurse arrives, you're back upstairs, on your knees by the piano, gently gathering the shattered ivory keys and splintered wood into a pile. You've scrubbed some of the blood from the floor, though the stains are stubborn. The piano looks gutted—her insides exposed, wires torn and twisted like veins. Your heart aches again. Not for the piano. But for him.
Heeseung, who stayed downstairs. Who let someone else tend to him while you tried to do what you could for the mess he left behind. You hear footsteps coming up the stairs, then his voice—calmer now, hoarse, but steady. "Leave it." You glance over your shoulder. He's standing there, freshly bandaged, a clean shirt half-buttoned and hanging loose on his frame. The nurse must have left quietly.
"I'm still your cleaner, remember?" you say lightly, trying to ease the air. "Let me do my job." His lips twitch. But there's something softer in his eyes now—something closer to sorrow than amusement.
"You're more than that." You pause and look down at the broken keys in your hands. "I know."
And he comes to you—sinks down beside you on the floor, still moving slowly like he's holding his bones together by sheer will—and rests his forehead to yours again. Neither of you says anything else, you just sit in the wreckage of something beautiful. Together.
*•*•*
It's hard to say how much time has passed. Days, maybe. Weeks. The kind that blur together, quiet and golden at the edges, like light filtered through gauze. The scar on Heeseung's arm is healing well—just a thin red seam now, barely visible when he rolls his sleeves up. He doesn't try to hide it anymore.
You're downstairs today. The sun is dipping low and warm across the windows, lighting up the dust motes dancing in the air. The piano stands rebuilt, restored—not the same one from upstairs, but something new. Something you picked out together.
You're sitting beside him on the bench, your knees touching. Heeseung's hands are guiding yours across the keys with quiet patience.
"No, baby, focus" he murmurs, laughing when you hit the wrong note again. "That's an A, not a G."
"I am focused," you argue, shoulders tensing in mock defense. "I just—I forgot which finger goes where." He leans closer, brushing his lips against your temple. "The one I showed you. Your third finger. C'mon. Try again." You exhale, pouting a little as you reposition your hands. Heeseung watches you with a softness that folds itself into the corners of his smile.
You press the keys again. It's still wrong. You groan dramatically. "Ugh, why is this so hard?" And he can't help it—he grabs your chin and kisses you mid-pout. Quick and warm. The kind of kiss that says you're the most precious thing I've ever ruined myself for.
Your lips curve into a grin beneath his. He chuckles. "You know what I think?"
"Hm?"
"I think you just like messing up so I'll kiss you."
You nudge him with your shoulder. "Maybe." Heeseung leans in again. A little slower this time. A little deeper. Then his hands return to the keys. And so do yours.
You sit like that a while—two shadows against the shine of the piano, laughter and missed notes echoing softly in the room. And if someone were to peek in just then, they might think it's a simple thing. A boy and a girl, and a piano between them. But it's not. It's an anchor. A promise. A world rebuilt from ash and ghosts and broken music.
And maybe you never learned to play perfectly, but he never stopped telling you you were the most beautiful song he'd ever heard.
══════════════════════════
•taglist-
@immelissaaa @fancypeacepersona @inawonderfulworld @usuallyunlikelyfox @starry-eyed-bimbo @strayy-kidz @mheretoreadff @bloomiize @xoenhalover @mamuljji
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delulumel ¡ 1 month ago
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𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚90 Days
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Jeongin x reader / co-workers / slow-burn / smut / bet
**involves!!** strong sexual tension, cursing, dirty talk, inappropriate touch, strong language, sexual content
enjoy xx (request open)
★.•☆•.★★.•☆•.★¸.•☆•.¸★ skzstarl0ver ★⡀.•☆•.★⡀.•☆•.★¸.•☆•.¸★
The office was colder than it had any right to be at 9:04 in the morning.
You wrapped your arms around yourself as you stood by the front desk, trying to figure out if the receptionist had given you the wrong floor. Your ID badge hung awkwardly from your neck, and you were already regretting taking this 90-day temp assignment.
Paper-pusher. Data entry. Eight hours a day in a room with no windows and coffee that tasted like burnt regret.
Someone coughed behind you.
"New temp?" came a voice, amused.
You turned — and immediately felt your gut twist.
He was tall, all lean lines and a devil-may-care slouch. His black button-down was rolled to his elbows, revealing veins and slim wrists, and his lanyard was tucked into his pocket like he didn’t give a shit about protocol. He had the kind of face that didn’t belong in a place like this. Sharp jaw. Full lips. Dark, knowing eyes that flicked over you like he was trying to place a bet.
"I’m Jeongin," he said, offering you a lazy, one-handed wave. "Also a temp. Also trapped in this soulless office graveyard. You’ll love it."
You blinked. "You’re way too cheerful for someone on a contract job."
He smirked. "What can I say? I like to suffer with a little flair."
Your eyes narrowed slightly — not out of annoyance, exactly. He had that thing. That careless, insufferably attractive thing. The kind of guy who knew he was hot and witty and liked to poke at people just to see how long it would take to get under their skin.
You didn’t shake his hand. Just turned back toward the elevator, muttering, "Ninety days. That’s all I have to survive."
From behind you, you heard a low whistle.
"Counting down already? Damn. You’re colder than the printer room."
You ignored him.
But you also didn’t miss the way his eyes followed you as you walked away.
The office was worse than you expected.
Gray carpet. Beige walls. Monitors the size of microwaves. And the people? Mostly lifeless, polite smiles and flat laughter. You tried to focus on your spreadsheet training — but it was hard to concentrate when he was seated two desks away, spinning in his chair and humming quietly to himself.
By lunch, he’d already made himself known.
You were eating in the breakroom when he appeared beside you, biting into a granola bar and flopping into the chair across from you with no invitation.
“So,” he said. “Where’d they drag you in from?”
You chewed slowly. "...Temp agency. You?"
He leaned back, arms stretched behind his head. "Freelancer. Usually graphic stuff. This is my ‘I need rent money’ gig."
His shirt lifted slightly with the stretch. You tried not to look. Failed. Looked back at your sad pasta salad.
“Anyway,” he said, licking peanut butter off his thumb. “I like you. You’re mean.”
"I’m not mean."
"You haven’t smiled once."
"Maybe you’re not funny."
He grinned. “See? Mean. I’m keeping you.”
You stared at him.
"Jeongin, this is a 90-day contract. Not The Bachelor."
He leaned forward, chin in hand, eyes dancing.
"Exactly. Ninety days. Let’s make it interesting."
It didn’t take long for him to become the most tolerable part of your day.
Not that you’d admit it out loud.
He was constantly showing up at your desk — under the pretense of “asking for a stapler” or “needing backup” when talking to clients. But he never stayed on topic. It was always jokes, quips, a constant stream of banter laced with something… warmer.
Something that made your stomach turn in the best possible way.
You caught yourself laughing more than usual. Blushing when he looked at you a second too long. You told yourself it was just boredom — office life was so dull that any distraction would feel like a spark.
But the truth was, Jeongin wasn’t just charming. He was thoughtful in subtle ways. He memorized your coffee order. He slid your favorite pens onto your desk without a word. He’d whisper stupid things during team meetings just to make you smile behind your hand.
And he was always watching you.
Quietly. Casually. Like he already knew exactly what kind of thoughts were starting to creep into your head every time he leaned a little too close.
You hated how much you noticed him.
The smooth stretch of his throat when he laughed. The way his fingers drummed rhythmically when he was focused. How his voice dipped when he got serious.
God. You were in trouble.
It came to a head in the stockroom.
Week three. You were reaching for toner. He was there — again — pretending to “supervise,” because apparently flirting counted as a workplace hobby.
Your fingers brushed as you reached for the same box.
You froze.
He didn’t.
Jeongin leaned in, so close you could smell him — that warm scent of cedar and citrus and something subtle that had become your new favorite weakness.
"You always get this breathless when I’m around?" he asked, voice low.
Your hand tightened around the box. "You’re in my space."
His lips quirked. “You’re in mine.”
You turned — and suddenly, the shelf was at your back, and his body was in front of you, close enough to feel heat in every inch of air between you.
His gaze dropped to your mouth. Then back to your eyes.
"You gonna stop me if I kiss you?" he asked.
Your breath hitched.
You didn’t say anything.
So he did.
It wasn’t gentle. It was heat and want and frustration all tangled in a kiss that felt like it had been waiting for weeks. His hands found your waist, yours curled into his shirt, and you gasped when his tongue slid against yours, slow and teasing.
You were halfway to climbing him when he pulled back.
His breathing was rough. So was yours.
But he only smiled.
"Not yet," he said softly. “That’d be too easy.”
And just like that, he left you in the stockroom, heart pounding, lips tingling, thighs pressed tight.
You could still feel the ghost of Jeongin’s lips on yours hours later.
It was ridiculous. You had a job to do, spreadsheets to finish, and yet every time you looked at your computer screen, your mind rewound to that stupid, reckless kiss in the stockroom. The way his hands had settled on your waist, firm but not too tight — the way his breath had caught when you’d pressed closer.
You told yourself it meant nothing.
But you’d been lying to yourself since Day One.
Jeongin didn’t make things easier.
If anything, he made them worse.
He was suddenly everywhere.
Leaning into your personal space during meetings. Whispering dirty jokes that made your cheeks burn. Sliding his fingers dangerously close to yours under the table, his touch a mere brush — enough to electrify, not quite enough to break the fragile boundary.
That morning, he sauntered into the break room, wearing a grin so crooked you suspected it was a challenge.
“Got a minute?” he asked, voice low, sliding onto the chair beside you.
You glanced around. “Shouldn’t we be working?”
He shook his head. “Nah. We have time. And I have an idea.”
You raised an eyebrow.
“Let’s make a deal.”
Your interest piqued, despite yourself.
He pulled a pen from his pocket and clicked it thoughtfully.
“I propose a bet. We’re stuck here, counting down these miserable days, right?”
You nodded.
“So,” he said, leaning closer until you could see the shimmer in his eyes, “no sex until Day 90.”
You blinked. “What?”
“Think about it.” He smiled wickedly. “If we make it without breaking the rules, on the last day — I get to ruin you.”
You laughed — nervous, breathless, because you knew he wasn’t joking. “Ruin me?”
He brushed your hair behind your ear, fingers lingering too long. “I want you so desperate by then you won’t know your own name.”
You swallowed hard.
“You’re insane.”
He shrugged. “Maybe. But I’m good at winning.”
The days that followed were torture.
Jeongin’s touches became teasing — light grazes on your arm, fingers tracing patterns on your back when he passed by. His whispers were promises and threats woven together.
“Bet you’re thinking about me right now.” “Don’t even pretend you didn’t want me to kiss you again.” “You look like you need a release, and I’m the only one who can give it.”
You tried to focus on work. You really did.
But the ache between your thighs was becoming impossible to ignore.
Every glance, every brush of his hand set your skin on fire. You caught him watching you, hunger smoldering in his eyes, and you had to bite your lip to keep from falling apart right there.
One night, two weeks before Day 90, you found yourself texting him.
This is torture.
His reply came almost instantly.
You love it.
You hated him.
You loved him.
And then finally...
Day 90 arrived.
You clocked out.
Jeongin’s hand found yours in the parking lot.
His eyes were dark, full of that same reckless promise.
“Ready to be ruined?”
You smiled, breathless.
“I’ve been ready.” (pt.2??)
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delulumel ¡ 2 months ago
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˗ˏˋ04. BOYFRIEND PACKAGE UNLOCKED
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pairingᝰ.ᐟ sim jaeyun x reader
warningsᝰ.ᐟ fingering, oral, unprotected sex, etc.
natty's notesᝰ.ᐟ mdni, hate comments will be deleted.
statusᝰ.ᐟ 4/9 completed!
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the bed feels too big the moment your warmth is gone. jay stirs slowly at first, the sunlight brushing against his eyelids, the faint weight of the blanket still clinging to his side where you were supposed to be. he doesn't open his eyes right away—not because he's tired, but because something in him already knows. when he does, the empty space beside him confirms it. you're gone. no note, no message, no sound from the hallway. just the faint scent of you lingering on his pillow, a whisper of your presence still folded into the sheets like a promise he thought you might stay long enough to keep. he pushes himself up slowly, muscles tense, chest tight, eyes flickering to the empty corner where you stood last night in that lace. where he first kissed you. where something changed.
he swallows down the knot in his throat as he reaches for his phone on the nightstand, screen already lighting up with notifications. thousands of them. likes, comments, reposts, subscriptions pouring in like a flood. the video is viral—trending faster than anything he’s ever uploaded, his name attached to a level of attention he didn’t even plan for. but none of it feels right. not without you here. he taps into the earnings, sees the numbers spike, thumbs hovering over the payout settings for a second too long before he finally splits it and sends your share directly to your contact. the confirmation ping echoes hollow in the room, too loud against the quiet you left behind. and then he opens a message thread with your name at the top and types—
why’d you leave without saying anything?
but before he can hit send, his thumb lingers. he watches the text for a moment… and deletes it.
he sinks back into the bed for a second, phone resting on his chest now, but it doesn’t feel like comfort. it feels like static. like all the tension he’d carried leading up to last night has only unraveled into more questions. he’d told himself not to get attached. he’d told himself it was just a collab—just a girl. but the second he saw you, something cracked in him. something deep. and now that you’re not here, it aches. not in a way he can shake off. not in a way that goes away with the camera light. he closes his eyes again, the sheets still warm, the air still holding your perfume, and he wonders if you’ll ever come back.
he picks up his phone again and reopens the thread with your name. it’s empty. no response. no message. nothing but your contact name and a blank screen, like you were never here at all. and yet… the feeling of your mouth still lingers on his skin. your voice echoes in the back of his mind like a melody he can’t unhear. he wants to ask you something. anything. but every question sounds like too much—or not enough. so he doesn’t type this time. he just stares.
the numbers keep ticking up, but it doesn’t mean anything now. he sees the comments flooding in—about your moans, your movements, the way you took everything like you were made for it. praise stacked on praise, attention that anyone else would revel in. but jay doesn’t even crack a smile. because none of them saw the moment after the camera turned off. none of them saw the way you trembled in his arms. the way you melted when he washed you off. none of them saw the soft way you curled into him under the covers like you belonged there. like you wanted to stay.
he pulls himself from the bed eventually, sluggish movements betraying the tightness in his chest. he gets dressed in silence, doesn’t bother fixing the sheets, doesn’t open the blinds. the place feels dim, even with the sun out. lifeless, even though he’s never lived here with anyone else. the success of the video buzzes around him, growing louder by the second, but all he hears is the absence of your breathing. the way you slipped out while he slept. like you were afraid of what it meant if you didn’t. like if you stayed, you’d have to admit something neither of you were ready to say. and maybe you’re right. maybe it is just content. maybe he was stupid to think it could be more. but fuck, does he wish you’d stayed.
he paces once through the living room, then sits back on the couch, phone in hand, still staring at the message thread that won’t light up. still wondering if you’ll text first. still hoping that maybe—just maybe—you’re thinking about it too. he taps open your profile again, thumb brushing the edge of your last video, eyes scanning the comments like one of them might hold a clue. but it’s just noise. it’s always noise. and it means nothing if it’s not coming from you.
he’s done this so many times—invited someone over, gone through the checklist, lit the camera, said the lines, hit the angles, cleaned up after. rinse. repeat. content made. money earned. another collab in the books. but this one isn’t settling right. not in his chest. not in his bones. not in the part of him that’s still waiting to hear your voice on the other end of his phone. and it’s fucking with him more than he wants to admit.
he tells himself it’s just the afterglow. that the shoot went well, better than most, and that’s why it’s still sitting in his gut like something unfinished. but deep down, he knows it’s more than that. he’s had good scenes. he’s had better reactions, better angles, louder moans. he’s worked with people who were more open, more enthusiastic, more willing to take it further. and yet, none of them felt like you. none of them lingered in the air like the way you smelled when you pressed into his chest. none of them looked at him after like you did—like you weren’t acting, like the lines between camera and person had blurred too far to separate. and that’s what’s messing him up. that’s what’s got him replaying every second like it means something.
he doesn’t want to be the guy who catches feelings from a collab. he’s always been careful. always stayed detached enough to keep it easy. clean. business. but this? this isn’t clean. it’s messy. it’s tangled in the way you gasped when he poured wax down your stomach. in the way your voice cracked when you begged him to keep going. in the way you whispered thank you under your breath before you collapsed into him. and fuck, he hasn’t stopped hearing it. hasn’t stopped seeing it. like his memory has decided to loop the night for him whether he asked it to or not.
he paces through the kitchen, opens the fridge, then closes it again. he isn’t hungry. he just needed something to do. something to distract himself from the voice in his head asking why it matters so much that you’re gone. he’s not supposed to care. he’s not supposed to notice. he’s supposed to move on to the next booking, the next message, the next set of pretty eyes who’ll let him do the same thing and call it work. but he doesn’t want to. not yet. not when he still remembers the sound of your breathing slowing beneath the water. the weight of your head on his chest. the way you didn’t flinch when he told you you were the most beautiful thing he’d ever touched.
he swipes through his texts again. pauses on your contact. wonders what he’d even say if he reached out. he wants to ask you if you slept well. if you made it home safe. if you meant any of it. but those aren’t the kinds of questions you ask someone you filmed a scene with. not unless you’re willing to admit it wasn’t just a scene. not unless you’re ready to confront what the hell that night actually was. and jay’s not ready. not really. because if he is—then it means something has to change. and he doesn’t know what to do with that yet.
he thinks of heeseung for a moment—of the way he showed up at his place a few days ago, dragging his body through the door like he’d just lost a fight. he remembers the tension in his shoulders, the way his voice cracked when he said she left. he didn’t say much else. didn’t offer a name. just that she walked out like it meant nothing. jay had laughed at the time. teased him about catching feelings over a girl he barely knew. but now—now it doesn’t seem so funny. now he’s the one sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at the impression in the sheets and wondering what the fuck just happened.
you were supposed to be a good collab. a name to tag. a body to light. a voice to frame. you weren’t supposed to be the thing that left his bed feeling colder than the rest. you weren’t supposed to make him hesitate. to make him wonder if he did something wrong. to make him think about what it meant when you stayed the night and didn’t say goodbye. and now? now he doesn’t know if he wants you to text him back—or if he’s terrified you actually will. because whatever this is? it’s already not content anymore.
—
you sit on the floor of your bedroom, back pressed against the frame of your bed, phone facedown beside you, like it might say too much if you even glance at it again. your knees are tucked to your chest, arms wrapped loosely around them, hoodie sleeves pulled over your hands like they’re supposed to keep you from unraveling. outside your window, the afternoon light filters in soft and sleepy, and inside your chest, everything feels like it’s shifting without permission.
nari knocks once before slipping into your room without waiting, a mug in her hands and a gentle concern on her face like she can already read the weight behind your eyes. she doesn’t ask right away, doesn’t speak—just settles beside you on the floor, her thigh pressed against yours and the faint smell of vanilla rising from her sweater. you’re grateful for the silence, for the way she always knows how to sit in it with you without making it worse. but after a minute, your voice cracks the space between you, low and tired. “do you ever think maybe i’m doing too much?” she blinks, looking over. “like… all this. the videos. the messages. meeting people i barely know. does that sound crazy to you?” her expression softens like she’s heard this before, but never from you.
you press your forehead to your knees, the cotton of your hoodie warm against your skin, trying to stop the thoughts from spiraling too fast. “i didn’t expect it to feel like this,” you say quietly. “like i’m giving away pieces of myself without realizing it until it’s already done.” the words sit heavy in your mouth, shaped by guilt, by confusion, by something softer you don’t want to admit out loud. “and now it’s like… it’s not just filming anymore. it’s not just content. it’s—” you hesitate, searching for the word. “intimate.” you finish. “it feels intimate. and i don’t know if it’s supposed to.” you lift your eyes then, finally looking at her. “is that normal?”
nari’s quiet for a moment, like she’s letting the weight of your words settle before she touches them. she reaches out gently, wrapping her fingers around your wrist, grounding you the way she always does—with her presence, not her judgment. “of course it’s normal,” she says softly. “you’re doing something incredibly intimate. just because it’s filmed doesn’t mean it’s not real.” she squeezes your wrist once, then again. “your body knows the difference between performance and connection, even if your brain hasn’t caught up yet.” you blink, swallowing against the ache in your throat. “so i’m not… broken?” you ask. “no,” she replies without hesitation. “you’re just human.”
you nod slowly, the lump in your throat not gone, but easier to carry now. you lean your head against her shoulder, grateful for the way she always finds the words when yours feel too tangled. “sometimes i feel like i’m living two lives,” you whisper. “there’s me here—taking orders, paying bills, scraping by. and then there’s this other version of me online, in front of a camera, being seen by people who don’t even know what my favorite color is.” nari lets out a soft hum, her hand stroking your arm. “both versions are real,” she says. “they’re just trying to figure out how to live in the same skin.” and somehow, that makes all the difference.
—
you’ve been calling out names for the past hour and a half without looking up. your fingers move automatically now—punching buttons on the screen, wiping syrup from your palms, sealing plastic lids with a snap that feels too sharp in your ears. you’re on your third refill of watered-down iced coffee and it doesn’t taste like anything anymore. someone asks if their drink is dairy-free three separate times. the espresso machine screeches again. the printer spits out another rush of orders before you’ve even caught up with the last. your wrist hurts. your lower back throbs. your voice is running dry, barely audible over the constant hum of people waiting.
you pull a sticker from the printer, slap it on the side of a cold cup, and slide it down the counter like clockwork. “grande pink drink with light ice,” you call out, monotone. a woman steps forward, grabs it without saying thanks. you almost smile anyway, out of habit. almost. but then you spot her—just past the edge of the milk bar, standing there like she always does when she’s trying to look casual. arms crossed, tablet in hand, eyes sweeping the floor.
you brace yourself before she even opens her mouth, the kind of instinctive reaction your body has learned after months of being under her watch—where every interaction feels like walking a tightrope, balancing politeness with exhaustion. you lift your head just slightly, posture stiffening as you wipe your damp palms against your apron, your fingers sticky from caramel syrup and trembling with the kind of restraint that’s worn thin over time. your eyes don’t leave her, not because you’re trying to be bold, but because if you look away now, you’re not sure you’ll be able to hold onto the small flicker of resolve burning in your chest. she makes her way toward you with a familiar gait—unhurried, calculated, the kind of slow approach that makes you feel like you’re already in trouble before she even speaks. her lips are pursed, her eyes narrowed just enough to register dissatisfaction without being overtly rude, and her arms are crossed like she’s been standing there long enough to decide she doesn’t like what she sees.
“y/n,” she says, and your name sounds like a warning, softened only by that professional sweetness she always laces into her tone when she’s about to tell you you’re doing something wrong. “can you try to pick it up a little?” she adds, glancing at the growing line of impatient customers, then back to you with eyebrows raised. “we’re already behind.” it’s not harsh—not really—but it lands like a slap anyway, the implication behind her words echoing louder than the phrasing itself. you’ve heard her say versions of this before, always when you’re running on empty, always when you’re giving more than you have left, and still it’s never quite enough. you don’t answer right away. the words hang in the air between you, familiar and irritating and heavy with the weight of everything you’ve been too afraid to say. you look down slowly, your gaze drifting to your apron, the fabric wrinkled and damp around the edges, to the sticker still clinging to your hand, printed with a name you don’t care to read. and then it settles—like a hush in your chest—because this moment isn’t just something you’ve thought about. it’s something you’ve practiced.
you move with a strange calmness, not mechanical, not rushed, but deliberate—like every motion you make has finally caught up with a choice you already made in silence weeks ago. your hands lift to the knot at the back of your waist and untie your apron slowly, carefully, as though the small gesture deserves reverence. you fold it once, then again, smoothing out the fabric like it means something, and place it gently on the counter beside the headset, which you remove from your head with the same quiet finality. there’s a pause after that. a stillness. and then you raise your eyes, finally meeting hers without blinking, your expression neutral but unreadable. “i’m done,” you say, and though your voice isn’t loud or sharp, it cuts through the clatter of cups and background noise like a clean tear through cloth. it doesn’t sound angry. it doesn’t even sound sad. it sounds like release.
she furrows her brows slightly, tilting her head like she’s unsure if she heard you correctly. “done with what?” she asks, and you can tell by her face that she’s genuinely confused, because in her mind, this isn’t something you’re allowed to say. you let out a quiet breath, not a sigh exactly, but something closer to an exhale that’s been stuck in your chest for too long. “this,” you clarify, voice still even but firmer now, like you’re finally standing on solid ground. “the job. i’m quitting.” the words settle around you like a weight lifted, like a lock clicking open from the inside out, and you can feel the adrenaline moving through your blood in slow, hot waves, but it doesn’t make you dizzy this time. it makes you steady.
she doesn’t respond at first. just blinks at you like you’ve spoken in a language she’s never heard before—like the idea of you leaving hasn’t even existed as a possibility in her world. you can see the gears turning behind her eyes, the slight twitch of her mouth as she tries to figure out if this is some kind of joke or a moment of heat you’ll immediately take back. and maybe if it were a month ago, you would’ve. maybe you’d apologize, force a smile, tie your apron back on and pretend like none of this ever happened. but not this time. you don’t smile. you don’t soften it. you just stand there, and watch her try to make sense of it.
“wait… you’re—quitting?” she says finally, her voice hitching just enough to betray how caught off guard she really is. her eyes scan your face, searching for something—uncertainty, maybe, or regret—but all she finds is quiet resolve. “are you sure? you didn’t give notice, we’re—i mean, we’re short-staffed as it is. i could give you a couple extra days off if you need them or—”
you shake your head before she can finish, not harshly, but with enough certainty to stop the sentence in its tracks. it doesn’t matter that she’s trying now. it’s too late. she had all the chances in the world to notice how burnt out you were. how invisible you felt. how little of yourself you had left to give.
you reach behind your neck, unfastening the rest of your apron, and fold it carefully in half before stepping forward and holding it out to her. your hand doesn’t shake. it doesn’t hesitate. she stares at it for a beat too long before accepting it, almost robotically, like her body moves before her brain catches up. she looks down at the crumpled fabric in her hands like it’s proof that this is real, that you’re not going to change your mind. that for the first time, you’re the one walking away.
you don’t say goodbye. you don’t thank her for the opportunity or apologize for the timing or offer to cover one last shift to make things easier. you just turn, moving toward the back wall where you keep your tote bag and jacket tucked into the metal cubby that still has your name on it in faded label tape. you sling the bag over your shoulder, check that your phone and keys are inside, and walk through the same door you’ve walked through a hundred times before—only this time, it feels different. like a closing. like a small, quiet revolution.
the second the cold air hits your face, you feel it—the weight loosening in your chest, the ache in your shoulders dissolving, the burn behind your eyes softening into relief. the street is loud, but it doesn’t matter. you move through it like you’re somewhere else entirely. your legs carry you forward before your mind fully catches up, past the familiar shops and corners you’ve passed on too many tired mornings, your steps steady and purposeful now, like your body knows where you’re going even if your thoughts haven’t settled.
you slip your hand into your tote bag without stopping, fingers brushing past your wallet and charger until they close around the smooth edge of your phone. it’s warm from all the buzzing, and the screen lights up before you even look down. three tip notifications. two new subscribers. and one message thread that catches your eye before anything else—bold and unread, his username in lowercase: @jakeoncam.
you swipe it open with your thumb, slowing your pace just enough to read as you cross the intersection near your block.
jakeoncam: gonna pick you up 8, okay?
there’s a second message right beneath it.
jakeoncam: don’t stress about anything, i don’t bite ;)
your heart lifts in a way you didn’t expect, something warm unfurling in your chest like the sun cutting through heavy clouds. you stop at the edge of your building’s steps and glance at the time—6:17 p.m.—enough time to shower, change, and pretend for a little longer that your life isn’t balancing between two separate versions of yourself. the girl who just quit her job, and the one who’s about to step into a stranger’s car and play pretend until it starts to feel real.
you take the stairs two at a time, heart knocking steadily against your ribs—not from nerves, not exactly, but from something closer to momentum. like you’re already halfway into the next chapter without realizing it. your keys jingle softly in your hand as you reach your floor, the chipped silver door familiar beneath your fingertips as you unlock it with a quiet click. inside, your apartment smells faintly like coconut body wash and citrus cleaner, the leftover scent of a space you’ve slowly begun to make your own.
you shut the door behind you, dropping your bag onto the couch with a thud that echoes louder than expected in the small space. you exhale and head straight to the bathroom, stripping off your clothes along the way, leaving behind a trail that marks the difference between that life and this one.
you let the water run hot, hotter than usual, steam curling around your body as you step inside and tilt your head back under the spray. for a minute, you don’t move. you just breathe. let the heat soak into your skin and chase off the last remnants of espresso and sweat and everything you don’t need anymore. when you step out, it’s like shedding the day entirely. like something new has settled onto your shoulders in its place—light, intoxicating, electric with possibility.
you wrap yourself in your softest towel and move to your mirror, brushing your fingers over your face like you’re studying yourself again. not the barista. not the customer service smile. you. the girl he’s coming to pick up at eight.
your closet door creaks as you open it wider, the low sound slicing through the quiet hum of your apartment. it’s not overflowing, but it holds enough—enough lace, enough silk, enough textures you’ve worn in front of the camera when the goal was to entice, to impress, to make people pay attention. but tonight feels different. not performative, not transactional, not like you need to be touched-up and teased-out until you’re a fantasy. it’s something quieter than that. more intimate. your fingers move past the usual suspects: black mesh, red strappy lingerie, dresses with seams that cling to your skin like second thoughts. you pause instead on a white tank top, one you haven’t worn in months. it’s light and clingy and slightly sheer, the kind of thing that rides up when you move too much, that dips just low enough at the neckline to suggest something without screaming it. it looks like comfort. it looks like home.
you pull it gently from its hanger, the cotton brushing over your fingertips like a secret, and fold it over your arm as you turn toward the dresser. you dig out a pair of soft pink shorts, high-waisted with a satin sheen that catches the low light of your bedroom, the hem fluttering around your thighs like a whisper. it’s not a look that demands attention. it’s not bold. it’s not curated to trend. 
you dress slowly, smoothing the top down over your stomach, adjusting the waistband of the shorts so they sit just right on your hips. you stand in front of the mirror for a while, eyes trailing over your reflection, taking in the softness of it all—the undone hair, the flushed cheeks, the lip gloss still dewy from your last touch-up. you pin a piece of hair behind your ear, then let it fall again. you want to look like you didn’t try. but god, you did.
you spritz perfume onto the inside of your wrists and press them together, then dab a little behind your knees, between your thighs, where the scent will warm with every movement. you run gloss over your lips again, just enough to make them glisten, and watch the way they catch the light. you slip your favorite dainty necklace around your neck, the chain fine and silver and cool against your skin, and check the time again before turning to look out the window. the city is beginning to dim into dusk, buildings casting longer shadows, streetlights flickering on in slow succession. cars pass. people walk by in pairs, in groups, in rushes of laughter and low conversation. and then—one car pulls up and stops.
you lean a little closer to the glass, one hand bracing the windowsill. the car is dark, sleek, familiar in a way that tightens something low in your stomach. the headlights shut off. a figure steps out. even from here, you know it’s him. jake stands by the passenger door, phone in hand, thumb tapping a message. you don’t need to check your phone to know it’s already coming through. you grab it anyway. the screen lights up with a message bubble that makes your chest warm.
jakeoncam: i’m outside :)
your hand wraps tighter around your keys as you step out into the evening air, the door clicking shut behind you with a soft finality that feels louder than it should. the breeze ghosts along your skin, brushing over your bare legs and the loose fabric of your shorts, the scent of something sweet and warm—your perfume, your lotion, maybe even the faint trace of coconut from your earlier shower—carried on the wind like a secret. the street is quiet in that golden moment between daylight and dusk, and there he is—still leaned casually against the passenger side of the sleek black car, his head bowed slightly as he looks down at his phone, unaware that you’re standing there watching him see you for the first time.
you take a few slow steps forward, your sandals brushing lightly against the sidewalk, and as your shadow crosses into his space, he looks up.
his reaction is instant—but not loud. not exaggerated. his whole posture shifts, his back straightening, his shoulders squaring subtly like something invisible has moved through him. his eyes meet yours and hold—longer than they should, longer than is comfortable if you weren’t already both half-aware that this moment was coming. you see it then: the way his lips part, just slightly. the way his fingers curl a little tighter around the phone in his hand. there’s no smirk. no wink. no casual quip to break the silence. he just… looks at you.
you blink, suddenly hyper-aware of how warm your face is. you open your mouth to say something, anything, but before a word can form, he’s already moving—pushing himself off the car, sliding his phone into his pocket as he walks around the front to the passenger side. he reaches the door before you do, fingers curling around the handle, and without saying a word, he opens it.
“thanks,” you murmur, voice soft with surprise, and he just tilts his head toward the open door, gesturing for you to get in like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
you lower yourself into the passenger seat carefully, your hands smoothing your shorts instinctively as you settle in—and the moment your body hits the leather, you still. the interior is pristine. quiet. the kind of silence that comes from money. you’ve never sat in a car this nice before, not even close, and the contrast hits you like a slow, rising warmth that starts in your chest and spreads down your arms. everything feels padded, soft and controlled, like the air inside is being filtered just for you. you let your eyes scan the dashboard, the matte finish of the screen, the glow of the console, the smoothness of the stitching along the seats. even the seatbelt feels expensive.
you glance over at him, eyes wide with a hint of disbelief. “okay,” you breathe out, half-laughing, “this is… wow.”
that’s when he grins, finally letting out the quietest chuckle as he closes the door behind you and walks around to the driver’s side. “what?” he says as he slides into the seat, glancing sideways at you with a look that’s all warmth and mischief. “you thought i was picking you up in, like, a busted toyota or something?”
you raise a brow, biting back a smile as your fingers trace the seam of the seat. “i mean… i wasn’t expecting to feel like i was about to be driven to a premiere.”
he hums low in his throat as he fastens his seatbelt, then starts the car with a smooth twist of his wrist. the engine doesn’t even roar—it purrs, soft and deep and controlled, like everything about this man who, up until now, you’ve only seen in curated fragments. there’s something surreal about it—this new dimension of him unfolding in front of you. and for a second, you forget that you’re not just here for a ride. you’re here for a shoot. a job. a collaboration.
you glance at him again as he pulls out into the street, the fading light casting a soft halo around his profile. “so…” you begin, voice careful but curious, “what exactly are we filming tonight?”
he glances at you, smile tugging at the corner of his lips but not fully forming. “you’ll see,” he says, tone playful but not unkind. “it’s not like the others. i wanted something different.”
you pause. you know you should ask for more details—boundaries, logistics, angles—but something in the way he says it makes you hesitate. not out of fear. out of intrigue.
the ride to his place is quiet—not awkward, not strained, just comfortably subdued. the kind of silence that feels filled with unspoken questions and maybe a few things neither of you are ready to say out loud yet. the city moves around you in soft streaks of gold and neon, traffic lights blinking red across the windshield, people walking in clusters on the sidewalks, laughter trailing behind as you pass. the interior of the car is warm, dimly lit, and smells faintly like leather and his cologne—woodsy and clean, with something deeper underneath that clings to your senses in a way you’ll probably remember later when you’re alone in your bed. you glance over at him a few times, just quick glances when he’s focused on the road, hands loose on the wheel, forearms firm and relaxed. his profile is calm. eyes forward. expression unreadable, but not cold. thoughtful, maybe. like he’s holding something close to his chest and waiting for the right moment to let it go.
when he finally turns onto a quieter street, the buildings thin out and grow taller. the sidewalks are cleaner. the air changes. the kind of neighborhood you don’t just happen to end up in—you have to get here. you try not to show your surprise, but your fingers tighten slightly on your bag in your lap, eyes scanning the rows of apartments that look more like personal museums than homes. he doesn’t say anything about it—doesn’t try to show off or explain—and somehow, that only makes it more surreal. there’s no keypad when he pulls into the underground garage, just a smooth lift of a hand as the security arm rises and he glides in like he’s done it a thousand times before.
you step out of the car into soft, echoing quiet. the garage is spotless, even the cement seems polished. your footsteps sound sharper here, more deliberate, like they carry weight they didn’t have outside. he walks beside you, close but not touching, and when you reach the elevator, he holds the door without needing to be asked. you step inside, and he presses the button for the top floor. no hesitation. no checking a key fob. just… top floor.
the silence stretches again, but this time, it feels heavier. not uncomfortable—just thick with anticipation. you feel it in the air between you, in the hum of the elevator and the soft scent of his hoodie lingering beside you. he doesn’t speak until the doors open, and even then, it’s barely above a murmur.
“you good?” he asks, glancing at you sideways, voice low.
you nod, meeting his gaze. “yeah. just... taking it all in.”
he smiles—just a flicker of it. “it’s just a place. you don’t have to be impressed.”
but you are. even if you don’t say it.
he leads you down a short hall, his steps quiet, his key sliding into the door with a smooth click. when he opens it, the first thing you notice is how clean it is. not sterile, not showroom-perfect—just lived-in in a way that’s neat but warm. dark floors, soft lighting, high ceilings. shelves lined with records and books and a few indoor plants that are actually thriving. the air smells like cinnamon and clean laundry, with the faintest trace of something familiar—like skin, maybe. like home.
you step in slowly, letting your eyes adjust to the lighting, and turn toward him as he closes the door behind you. “this is where you film?”
he nods once, toeing off his shoes. “sometimes. depends on the vibe.” he looks at you for a beat, then gestures with a tilt of his head. “come on. i’ll show you.”
you follow him down the hallway, past a small kitchen with marble counters and warm light under the cabinets, toward a room at the end. he opens the door without warning, revealing a softly lit bedroom that looks nothing like the usual shoot setup you expected. there’s no ring light. no backdrops. just a large bed with charcoal-gray sheets, a few candles burning on the dresser, and a single camera mounted low on a tripod at the corner of the room—facing the bed, but unobtrusive. intimate. natural. like it’s just… part of the space.
“you still haven’t told me what we’re doing,” you say, turning to him, suddenly more aware of how quiet the room feels with just the two of you standing in it.
he leans against the doorway like it’s the only thing keeping him upright, arms folded but not in that distant, unreadable way—more like he’s bracing himself. holding in more than he’s letting on. “i booked the boyfriend package,” he says, voice low, careful, like the words might fall apart if he says them too fast. “that’s… what i want us to film.”
you blink, unsure if you heard him right. “you did?”
he nods slowly, the motion subtle. “yeah. my subscribers have been asking for it—something different from me. softer. more connected. they’ve seen enough of the casual stuff. the rough cuts, the quick edits. they want something that feels real.” he glances around the room once, like he’s buying himself time. “i didn’t want to fake that kind of connection. not with someone i barely know, not with someone who wouldn’t get it.”
you’re about to ask what that means when his eyes meet yours again—steadier this time, heavier with something that makes your breath pause. “i wanted to do it with you.”
and there it is.
a flicker of something unspoken passes between you, and you feel it settle in your chest before your brain can even catch up. the weight of that choice. not random. not professional. you. you, whose face he’s just now seeing for the first time. whose voice he’s only heard in clips until now. whose presence is suddenly a lot more tangible than any frame or thumbnail ever allowed.
you watch it hit him in real time.
he shifts, uncrossing his arms like the posture suddenly feels too tight, too vulnerable. his eyes flick away for a second, jaw tightening. “i mean—fuck,” he mutters under his breath, rubbing the back of his neck. “sorry. that probably sounded—i didn’t mean it like…” he stops himself, tongue pressing into his cheek like he wants to rewind and erase the heat that’s creeping up the back of his neck. “i’m not trying to be weird. i just—now that i know what you look like… in person…”
his voice trails off, shoulders stiffening slightly. “i guess it’s different. seeing you. like this. i didn’t expect it to hit like that.”
he laughs, but it’s quiet and nervous and almost self-conscious, his eyes flicking back up to you with a kind of desperate softness, like he’s not sure if he just messed this up or made it something bigger than it should be. “you’re just… not what i expected.”
you tilt your head, heart beating a little faster. “and what were you expecting?”
he exhales, half a laugh, half a sigh. “someone less you.”
you don’t know what that means—but you feel it. in your spine. in your chest. in the strange, steady silence that follows, filled with too much of him and not enough distance. not anymore.
you don’t answer right away. not because you don’t know what to say—but because you do. it’s just heavy, sitting at the back of your tongue, waiting to be said in a way that won’t crack the atmosphere hanging between you. you’re still looking at him—at the shift in his body, the faint flush climbing up his throat, the way his fingers keep brushing the hem of his hoodie like he’s trying to anchor himself in something steady. he doesn’t usually fumble, you can tell. he’s smooth on camera, deliberate with his words, in control of how he presents himself. but now, with your full face in front of him, no blur, no mask, no screen between you—he’s unraveling just a little. and not because he’s flustered by the shoot. because it’s you.
you let the silence linger another beat before you exhale through your nose, soft and almost amused. “okay,” you say finally, voice low. “i’ll do it.”
he looks up like he wasn’t expecting you to say yes so easily, like part of him had already braced for rejection. his brows lift slightly, eyes searching your face for hesitation, but you give him none.
he sits beside you slowly, the edge of the bed dipping with his weight, and though he doesn’t reach for you, the space between your bodies hums with something new. not tension exactly—more like a current of anticipation. like something’s beginning, and neither of you is sure when it crossed over from conversation to countdown. the candlelight flickers against the walls, soft and golden, casting slow-moving shadows over the bedspread between you. you fold your hands in your lap and glance down at them briefly before speaking, steady now, certain about what you need.
“no choking. no slapping. no name-calling. i don’t want anything that feels like domination or degradation—not for this one.” your voice is even, but there’s a quiet firmness behind it. you’re not apologizing. just stating fact.
he nods immediately. “got it. nothing rough. all soft. affectionate.”
“if there’s undressing,” you add, “i want it slow. not all at once. like it’s not the goal.”
“of course.” he doesn’t hesitate. “everything gradual. natural. not performative.”
you pause again. “kissing?”
his eyes meet yours, and for a second you feel the air thicken between you. he speaks carefully. “i want to, if you’re okay with it.”
you nod. “i am. but keep it intentional. not like you’re trying to eat me alive.”
he lets out a quiet laugh, not mocking, just relaxed—like you’ve given him permission to settle back into himself. “no worries. all soft. like you’re already mine.”
the words settle heavy in your chest—not because of what they mean, but because of how easily he says them. like he’s done rehearsing. like he’s already begun.
you glance at the camera, still dark and idle. “how long are we recording for?”
“as long as it feels right,” he answers. “i’ll edit it down later. i just want to let it breathe.”
you nod again, your pulse soft but steady, and then—finally—he rises.
he walks over to the camera with slow, measured steps, adjusts the angle slightly, and presses the record button. a tiny red light blinks to life on the corner, small and steady. not intrusive. just watching. he doesn’t say action. doesn’t count you down. just turns and comes back to the bed like he’s stepping into something sacred.
you shift further up, your back resting against the headboard, legs bent slightly beneath you. he climbs onto the bed carefully, slowly, not closing the distance all at once. instead, he settles beside you again—this time angled inward, his body turned toward yours. you can feel the change immediately. he’s closer now. not touching. not yet. but he’s watching you like every movement matters. like this is the moment it starts.
“you good?” he asks again, quieter this time.
you meet his gaze, and the way the shadows play against his cheekbones makes him look softer. realer. “yeah,” you breathe. “i’m good.”
he exhales once, then lets his hand drift—slowly—onto the blanket between you, fingers just barely brushing the fabric closer to your thigh. “then come here,” he says, almost a whisper.
and something in the way he says it—gentle, coaxing, utterly calm—makes it feel like more than acting.
makes it feel like the scene has already begun.
the mattress shifts under his weight, the springs sighing softly as he settles beside you again, closer this time—close enough that the warmth from his body reaches your skin in slow waves, even though he still isn’t touching you. not really. just his presence is enough to tilt the air, to quiet everything else that was buzzing in your mind up until now. you glance down once more, instinctively smoothing the hem of your shorts over your thigh, as if remembering all over again what you’re wearing.
“I brought stuff,” you murmur, the words coming out half-breath, half-thought. your eyes lift to meet his, unsure why it even feels necessary to explain. “like… clothes. for filming. something cute. for the vibe.”
he watches you for a moment, and then—without missing a beat—he shakes his head, slow and steady.
“you don’t need it,” he says, voice low, final in the way it lands. not dismissive—sure. “you already look perfect.”
you blink, a little caught off guard—not because it’s the kind of thing you haven’t heard before, but because he doesn’t say it like it’s a line. doesn’t smirk. doesn’t follow it up with something cheeky to downplay it. he just says it like he means it. like he already believed it when you opened your door and stepped into his car. like this version of you—soft tank top, flushed cheeks, lips glossed just enough—is exactly what he wanted to capture all along.
you don’t answer. not out loud. but your body does—shoulders softening slightly, breath easing as you lean just an inch closer. not even a full lean. just enough to close a little of the space he’s left for you to decide.
his hand moves between you again, this time slower, more intentional. he doesn’t reach for you outright—he lets his fingers hover near your thigh, not quite brushing your skin. it’s like he’s waiting for a sign. like he wants you to close the gap.
you do.
just a small shift. just enough for your leg to graze his hand, to let your shoulder brush the sleeve of his hoodie. the contact is brief, featherlight, but it opens something. makes room for more.
his fingers curl slightly, brushing against the side of your leg before sliding up, the backs of his knuckles trailing softly along your outer thigh. it’s nothing. barely even a touch. but the way it’s delivered—slow, reverent, like he’s learning the curve of your body one inch at a time—makes your breath catch.
his hand moves again, this time rising gently to your arm. he doesn’t rush. he just skims up the length of it with the lightest drag of his fingertips, tracing from elbow to shoulder like he’s memorizing it. your skin prickles under the contact, every nerve waking up in a quiet, aching bloom.
and then—without a word—he reaches higher.
his hand lifts, brushing a few strands of hair back from your cheek, thumb grazing the edge of your jaw in the softest arc. it’s not meant to lead anywhere. it’s not hungry. it’s just a touch. one that says you’re here now, and i see you, and stay close.
you exhale without meaning to, and it’s not shaky—but it’s something. something just a little uneven.
his eyes flick to yours, steady and unreadable. “still okay?”
you nod once. “mmhmm.” you sound breathier than you meant to. more open. less on.
he smiles again, soft and small, and doesn’t say anything else. he doesn’t need to. the scene is already happening, and neither of you is acting anymore.
his hands come up slowly, fingers tracing up the curve of your arms in featherlight motions, like he’s memorizing the shape of you by feel alone. his touch is reverent, unhurried, gliding over your skin with a gentleness that makes your breath catch in your throat before you can stop it. the pads of his thumbs circle near your shoulders, and then you feel them—his fingers curling just beneath the thin strap of your white tank top. he doesn’t pull. not yet. he just pauses there, holding the fabric lightly, his eyes lifting to meet yours as if asking a question without speaking it aloud. the room feels still, quiet in a way that sharpens every small sound—your breathing, the soft creak of the mattress, the low hum of the candle flickering nearby. you hold his gaze for a moment longer, your heart beating a little harder beneath your ribs, and then you nod—small, certain. you see something flicker in his eyes at that, something deep and quiet, like he’s grateful. and then he moves closer, his lips parting just slightly as he exhales the softest, breathless sound against your skin.
“so soft…” he whispers, barely audible, but you feel it more than you hear it—low and warm, brushing over your shoulder as he leans in. your body sinks into the bed slowly, your back hitting the sheets as you ease down beneath him, his legs still planted on either side of you, caging you in without weight. the air feels thicker now, warmer, every inch of you awake under the way he looks at you, like you’re something he’s dreamed about more than once. his mouth hovers just above your skin, not touching yet, just close enough that the heat of his breath dances across your collarbone and sends a ripple of goosebumps down your arms. when he finally kisses you, it’s not on the lips—it’s at your bicep, a soft press of warmth against muscle, followed by another, then another, trailing up in slow succession. his fingers drag the straps of your top down gently, easing the fabric off your shoulders with care, never rushing. his lips follow the path his hands create, gliding over new skin with quiet reverence, curved in a soft smile when he reaches the hollow of your collarbone. he kisses you there, too—like it’s instinct. like it’s his favorite place to land.
his lips linger at your collarbone for a moment longer, the press of them so delicate it almost doesn’t register as real—just the ghost of contact, followed by the brush of his breath and the way his nose nudges gently against your skin. he doesn’t rush the next movement, doesn’t reach for your chest or drag the fabric further down; instead, his hands settle at your waist, thumbs resting lightly just above your hips as he pulls back just enough to look at you. his eyes trace your face slowly, like he’s scanning for any sign that you’ve drifted too far into your head, that this is too much, that maybe you’ve stopped feeling safe—but you haven’t. you’re still here, still warm beneath him, still open to whatever comes next. he sees that. and something in his face shifts again—less performer, more person. like the act is beginning to blur into truth, like this version of him is something he’s been saving. one of his hands lifts again, fingers brushing up your arm until they find your jaw, and he tilts your chin gently toward him, his thumb grazing the corner of your mouth as he breathes, “you look so good like this. i don’t think you even know.”
you feel your pulse stutter under your skin, not from the touch itself, but from the way he says it—low, slow, like it wasn’t meant to be heard by anyone but you. his voice is soft, but it carries something heavier underneath. affection, maybe. or longing dressed up like make-believe. his other hand shifts slightly at your side, fingers spreading across your ribs through the thin fabric of your tank top, holding you like you’re something delicate. you don’t speak. you don’t need to. the weight of the moment hangs between you, thick and warm, and you let yourself fall deeper into it, let yourself be the person he’s talking to. the person he sees like this—laid out beneath him, lips slightly parted, eyes soft with want. “i’d keep you like this forever if i could,” he murmurs next, his lips close enough to brush yours but not committing, not yet. “just wrapped up in me like this. warm, safe, mine.”
and even though you know it’s a scene—even though you know it’s being filmed—your body can’t tell the difference anymore.
his words melt into the air between you, lingering like steam, and for a second, all you can hear is the rhythm of your breath—his and yours syncing in that quiet space where time slows down. you feel the weight of his body shift just slightly as he leans closer, finally closing the gap between you, his mouth brushing over yours in a kiss that’s so gentle, it feels more like a question than a claim. there’s no hunger behind it, no pressure—just the warmth of his lips moving against yours like he’s trying to memorize the shape of them. he pulls back for a second, his nose nudging softly against yours, and when your mouth chases after his without thinking, he smiles. not smug. not cocky. just soft. like he didn’t expect you to want him back this much. his hand slides from your jaw to your neck, his thumb tracing the edge of your collarbone while his other hand flattens over your waist, slipping just beneath the hem of your tank with a careful slowness that makes your stomach flutter.
his palm is warm where it meets your skin, and he moves like he’s done this in a dream before—fingers spreading along your side, drifting upward inch by inch, not grabbing or groping, just feeling. the way he touches you is deliberate, every motion paced like it’s being recorded in his memory before it ever hits the camera. he kisses you again, deeper this time, and your lips part instinctively, inviting more—more of him, more of this softness that feels like it might wreck you if it lingers too long. his tongue brushes against yours, slow and unhurried, coaxing rather than taking, and it’s not filthy. it’s not performative. it’s just full. you make a sound in the back of your throat without meaning to, and his hand under your shirt rises a little higher in response, fingertips grazing the underside of your breast but never settling there—just circling, teasing, drawing heat into every nerve that lies beneath. when he pulls back from your mouth again, he’s breathing heavier, lips parted, eyes locked on yours like he’s never seen anything more important. “you’re doing so good, baby,” he whispers, and this time, the endearment doesn’t sound like a line. it sounds like a truth.
his eyes don’t leave yours, not even for a second, and you feel it—the way he reads you, waits for that small flicker of permission that lives in the way your breath hitches and your body leans in. his hand moves from beneath your shirt to your shoulder, sliding the thin strap of your tank down again, this time slower, like he’s savoring the drag of fabric over skin. he bends his head as he does it, pressing a kiss to your bare shoulder with a softness that makes your spine curve into the mattress. the other strap follows, peeled gently off your arm until both hang useless at your sides, the top of your tank now barely clinging to your chest. and then—his hand comes up, fingers brushing the hem where the fabric meets your sternum, and he waits. doesn’t tug. doesn’t ask. just looks at you like he needs to know you still want this. and you do. you nod, just once, and that’s all it takes.
his hand moves again, curling around the center of your top, and as he begins to lift it—inch by slow, teasing inch—he leans down and kisses you.
it’s not rushed. not greedy. it’s full and warm, his mouth slotting perfectly against yours like he’s been waiting for this exact moment to let himself want you openly. the kiss deepens as he drags the fabric upward, his hands careful not to pull too fast, not to break the rhythm between your mouths. your lips part for him automatically, breath catching as his tongue sweeps gently into your mouth again, slower this time, like he’s tasting something he doesn’t want to forget. your arms lift for him, letting the tank slide over your head, and he pulls back just long enough to ease it off—tossing it somewhere near the foot of the bed before settling back over you with a softness that makes your chest ache. your skin is bare now, your chest rising with every breath as the cool air kisses you first, followed closely by the warmth of him—his mouth returning to yours, his hand finding your waist, his whole body hovering just close enough to let you feel the weight of him without pressing it all at once.
his lips break away from yours only to find the corner of your mouth, then your cheek, then the dip just below your jaw, each kiss delivered like a secret—unrushed, purposeful, devastating in how tender they feel.
his lips don’t rush the journey downward—they move with intention, mapping the space from your jaw to your throat with soft, open-mouthed kisses that make your breath catch and your spine curve subtly beneath him. each press of his mouth is slower than the last, like he’s letting the weight of what he’s doing sink into both of you at the same time. his hand stays planted at your waist, steady and warm, thumb stroking absent-minded circles into your skin as if to keep you grounded while the rest of you slips further into this. he murmurs something low against your neck—inaudible, but not meaningless—and then drags his lips down to your collarbone again, this time kissing across it like he’s painting a line only he knows the shape of. your fingers tighten slightly in the sheets, breath coming slower now, deeper, as your chest rises into the heat of his mouth. he doesn’t comment on it. he just smiles against your skin, lips curving softly as he kisses the center of your sternum next, right where your heartbeat is loudest. his hand slides up again, fingertips brushing the underside of your breast now, more deliberate this time—still not grabbing, still not taking—just feeling, coaxing warmth into your skin in the way only a lover would.
he pulls back a little then, enough to look at you fully, eyes moving over your chest like he’s seeing something he shouldn’t be allowed to, like you’re something rare and delicate spread out beneath him. “you’re beautiful,” he says, voice just above a whisper, and the words sound so real, so unscripted, that you can’t even convince yourself they’re part of the act. before you can respond, his mouth is on you again—lower this time, his lips trailing down the curve of your breast with careful, reverent movements that make your fingers twitch where they rest beside you. he doesn’t go straight for your nipple—he circles around it first, lips warm and breath steady, building tension so slow it starts to ache. when he finally closes his mouth around it, it’s soft—gentle suction paired with the slow flick of his tongue, his hand sliding up to cradle the other breast with matching tenderness. you let out a breathy sound, something close to a whimper, and his grip tightens slightly, grounding you, his mouth never leaving you for even a second. everything about the way he touches you feels designed to make you feel cherished, not consumed—like he wants to undo you gently, not destroy you.
he doesn’t stop kissing you, not even when his mouth moves lower—down the slope of your ribs, the soft rise and fall of your belly, his breath warm and steady as it fans across newly bared skin. his hand follows his mouth in perfect rhythm, trailing down your side with fingers spread wide like he needs to feel all of you at once, like his touch alone isn’t enough to satisfy the way he’s looking at you. your skin hums under him, heat pooling low in your stomach as his lips press gently into the curve just above your navel, and you swear he smiles when you inhale sharply at the contact. he doesn’t rush it—doesn’t tug at your waistband or rip fabric away—he just lets his hand drift lower, fingertips grazing the seam of your shorts, dragging lightly back and forth like he’s asking without saying anything. you lift your hips just slightly in response, offering more than permission—offering yourself, and he takes it with both patience and hunger layered beneath the softness. his fingers hook into the waistband slowly, dragging the fabric down your thighs inch by inch, watching the way your body shifts beneath him, watching every breath you take like it means something to him personally. the shorts fall away easily, forgotten at the edge of the bed, and you’re left bare for him in a way that feels deeper than skin. his hand skims your hip now, palm warm and steady, thumb stroking the dip beside your pelvis like he’s easing you into the next wave of touch.
he kisses your hip next—just once, then again—before leaning back slightly to take you in fully, eyes roving slowly down your body with the kind of attention that makes your skin feel too tight around your bones. “fuck…” he breathes, not loud, not directed at you—just a thought escaping his mouth, like he can’t hold it in anymore. he leans over you again, his chest brushing lightly against yours, and kisses you on the mouth with a heat that feels new—less testing, more claiming. your hands rise instinctively, fingers curling into the fabric of his hoodie as his tongue brushes yours again, slower now, but deeper, like he’s trying to drag you under with him. one of his hands slips between your thighs, warm and careful, fingertips barely grazing your inner thigh as his lips keep moving against yours, like he wants to distract your mouth while his hand learns the rest of you. he doesn’t go straight to where you want him—he just teases, traces, presses the lightest touches into the soft skin between your legs, making you arch into him without even realizing. when his fingers finally reach the center of you, just barely brushing over your panties, you gasp softly into his mouth—and that’s when he groans, quiet and wrecked, like feeling your heat through the fabric alone has undone something in him.
“jake…” you breathe out, the sound slipping past your lips in a low, desperate moan as your hips roll forward slowly, instinctively chasing more of the friction his hand is barely offering. your thighs tense around his wrist, your body arching into his touch like it’s the only thing tethering you to the bed. you can’t help it—the way your body moves on its own, needy and aching, every nerve lit up with the hope of something deeper. but he doesn’t give in, not fully. he just lets out a soft groan, deep in his throat, the kind that vibrates low and hot against your skin as he leans closer. you feel the weight of his breath first, then the press of his lips right against your ear, and the sound alone makes your lashes flutter. “want me to touch you, baby?” he asks, voice no louder than a whisper, his words coated in something tender but wrecked, like he’s already half-drunk off you. his nose grazes your temple, lips hovering at your skin as your body stiffens just slightly, everything inside you tightening at once.
you nod before he even finishes the sentence, your head moving quickly, breath shallow, because you don’t trust yourself to speak without falling apart. and it’s enough for him—more than enough. his hand shifts just a little lower, fingers pressing in with purpose now, the soft pad of his middle finger rubbing slow circles over your clit through the fabric of your panties, so featherlight it nearly breaks you. your mouth falls open in a shaky exhale, the sound high and sweet as your thighs tremble around his hand. your body jolts with every tiny movement of his fingers, his rhythm steady, controlled, like he’s been waiting to do this right—not fast, not messy, just right. “fuck,” he breathes, barely moving his lips as he watches the side of your face. “you’re so fucking perfect, baby.” his voice is warm and reverent, the words dragging low across your skin as he studies you like you’re the only thing he wants to see—eyes fixed on every shift in your expression, every sound you give him, every way your body begs without words.
his fingers slow for just a moment, pressing the softest kiss beneath your ear as he exhales deeply, like he’s trying to anchor himself in this—in you. your body is already trembling, breath unsteady and chest rising in shallow waves, and you feel the fabric of your panties cling tighter to your center with every brush of his fingers. he shifts slightly beside you, gaze focused, hand moving lower with care, and then—finally—he slips his fingers beneath the fabric, pushing it gently to the side. your breath catches completely, your thighs parting on instinct, and the first real touch of his bare fingers against you makes your hips jerk forward with a soft, stuttering moan. the heat of his hand, the glide of his fingertips through your wetness—it’s enough to steal the sound right from your throat. “fuck, baby,” he whispers, his voice thick and low, like your body just confirmed something he’s been imagining for a long time. his fingers move again, one sliding slowly up and down your slit, careful and deliberate, testing the way you twitch under his touch before circling your clit with just the right amount of pressure. he doesn’t say anything else right away—he just watches, listens, feels you open under him like you were made for this pace.
your hands grip the sheets beside you, nails curling into the fabric as you try to breathe through the way he touches you—gentle but certain, like he knows exactly what you need before you can even form the words. he keeps his eyes on your face the whole time, studying the way your mouth falls open, the way your brows knit together, the way you tilt your hips up into his hand with a silent plea for more. and he gives it to you—just a little, just enough to make your legs shake as his fingers slide lower again, one slipping inside with slow, perfect ease. you gasp, your walls fluttering tight around the intrusion, and he groans softly under his breath like he felt it in his own body. “look at you,” he murmurs, kissing your temple between words, “so pretty like this… taking me so well.” his thumb drags gently over your clit as his finger curls, coaxing you open with every stroke, patient and relentless in his tenderness. it’s not about the rhythm yet—it’s about the connection, the way his body molds around yours like it was always supposed to be this close. and the longer he touches you, the more you forget about the camera, the scene, the setup—because all that’s left is this.
you’re already coming apart under him and he hasn’t even given you everything yet. just one finger inside you, slow and curling, paired with the soft drag of his thumb over your clit—it’s too much and not enough all at once. your hips lift into his hand with every pass, chasing it, clinging to it, aching for more friction, more fullness, more him. his eyes are still locked on you, but they’re darker now, his lashes low over heavy pupils, and you can tell he’s feeling everything—every squeeze of your walls around him, every gasp you try and fail to hold in. “that’s it,” he murmurs, voice low and close, right against your skin, as if he’s trying to speak directly into your bloodstream. “don’t hold it in, baby. i want all of it.” his lips find your cheek, then your jaw, then your mouth—kissing you like you’re the only thing that’s ever tasted right, like he needs to kiss you through this. and you let him, parting your lips to take him deeper, the wet slide of his tongue making your legs shake even harder than his hand does.
when he pulls back, his mouth stays close, his breath mixing with yours in the space between, and he shifts slightly, hand dragging lower for a second. he presses his palm flat against your mound, his knuckles grazing your slit, and then—so slowly it makes you whimper—he eases a second finger inside you. the stretch makes your thighs twitch, your body sucking him in like it’s what you were made for, and he groans low in his throat, the sound barely contained. “fuck,” he whispers, lips brushing your ear, “you feel so good, baby. you’re making it so hard to take it slow.” but he does. he does, even though his breath is shaky now and his jaw’s gone tight from holding back. his fingers start to move in a deeper rhythm—slow thrusts paired with purposeful curls, each one hitting the spot that makes your toes curl and your throat go tight with the need to cry out. his thumb doesn’t stop working your clit, rubbing small, maddening circles with just enough pressure to keep you teetering on the edge without falling. and every time your body jumps or clenches, every time a sound slips from your lips, he reacts—his mouth finds your neck, his hand presses deeper, his voice sinks lower.
“you’re taking me so well,” he says again, like it’s the only thing in his head now. “look at you—fuck, look at you. soaking my hand, grinding up on me like that.” and you are. you didn’t even notice when your hips started moving, chasing the rhythm, fucking yourself on his fingers while his body stays perfectly still. your legs spread wider without thought, one arm flung back above your head, the other clutching at his sleeve, desperate to anchor yourself to something. “it’s okay,” he murmurs, seeing the way your chest rises too fast, the way your thighs start to tremble. “i got you, baby. i got you. don’t fight it.” he leans back in and kisses you again, messier now, wetter, tongues sliding slow as his fingers start to speed up just enough to drag a new kind of sound from your throat. not soft anymore. not polite. it comes from somewhere deep—like the part of you he just found and refuses to let go of.
his free hand comes up to your waist, gripping it tighter now, holding you in place while your body bucks beneath him, and his kisses grow more urgent with each roll of your hips. he’s not asking anymore. he’s guiding. controlling. but not with force—with focus. like his only job in the world is to make sure you fall apart exactly the way you’re meant to. and still, he doesn’t stop talking. “you’re doing so good,” he whispers against your lips, his voice breathless but steady. “my good girl. letting me touch you like this. letting me ruin you this slow.”
you try to respond, but your voice breaks apart before it even forms. all you can do is gasp his name again, shaky and thin, your whole body vibrating as his fingers fuck deeper into you, curling up perfectly on every thrust. the pressure builds fast now—hot and dizzying and thick, your stomach clenching with every drag of his thumb, every filthy praise he breathes against your skin. “that’s it,” he says again, more frantic now, like he’s losing control, too. “you gonna come for me, baby? come on—let me feel it.”
and you do. god, you do.
you come with a cry, your mouth pressed to his shoulder as your legs shake and your whole body clenches around his fingers, pulsing with a rhythm that makes you forget everything but him. his name spills from your lips in pieces, high and broken, and he doesn’t stop—not right away.
he doesn’t say anything right away. just breathes. just watches. his fingers slide slowly from your body, coated in your slick, and you shiver at the sudden emptiness he leaves behind, your muscles still twitching with aftershocks. his hand rests gently on your thigh now, not pushing, just grounding you, and then he starts to move—shifting lower on the bed, his mouth trailing along your stomach in slow, open-mouthed kisses that make your breath catch all over again. you don’t know how he still feels calm after what he just pulled from you, but he does—like your orgasm was just the beginning, like he’s not satisfied until you’re too ruined to remember your own name. you watch through hazy eyes as he settles between your thighs, broad shoulders spreading you open wider with nothing more than his presence. the way he looks at your body should be illegal—his eyes low-lidded and dark, a soft smirk tugging at his lips like he already knows how wrecked you’re going to be. “you’re already shaking,” he murmurs, his voice quiet and full of heat, “and i haven’t even tasted you yet.”
he kisses your inner thigh first, not close to where you need him, just a slow press of his mouth to the softest skin he can find. you twitch under him, thighs flexing, but he hums low in his throat and holds you in place with a gentle grip, his thumb stroking idly as he switches sides. his lips drag across your skin, lazy and hot, tongue flicking out here and there to tease—not yet, not yet, his body seems to say. your fingers twist into the sheets, breath coming faster now, your entire body arching with every near-touch that doesn’t land where it’s supposed to. he’s taking his time, worshipping the space around your cunt like it’s sacred, like he’s saving the best part for last. “so pretty,” he says, more to himself than to you, his breath brushing over your folds without touching, and it makes your hips jump. his hands press down on your thighs again, firm but patient, and he smiles up at you like he’s the only one who knows how badly you need this. “you gonna let me make a mess out of you, baby?”
and then—finally—he leans in and licks one long, slow stripe through your folds.
you moan sharp and sudden, your whole body curling forward before you drop back into the sheets, your legs trembling around his shoulders. his tongue is soft but purposeful, warm and wet and steady as he takes his time tasting you, moaning softly against your cunt like it’s the best thing he’s ever had in his mouth. he doesn’t go for your clit right away—instead he teases it, tongue swirling slowly around it, flicking up just to feel your hips buck and your fingers twitch. his hands slide under your thighs to hold you open, pulling you closer to his mouth like he wants to bury himself in you completely. and he does—he groans again, a deep, wrecked sound that vibrates straight through your core, and then his lips wrap around your clit and suck gently, just once, and your vision goes white around the edges. you cry out his name, high and breathless, your thighs trying to close around his head, but he holds you wide and keeps going. every flick of his tongue is slow, calculated, like he’s testing you, learning exactly what drives you over the edge and then dialing it in.
“so fucking sweet,” he murmurs between licks, voice muffled and wrecked against your skin, “could stay down here all night.”
and god—you want him to.
his tongue moves like he knows what your body wants before you do, slow and fluid and fucking confident, dragging through your folds with a rhythm that makes your thighs shake around his head. every time you try to lift your hips, to grind closer, to chase the pressure building too fast behind your ribs, his hands hold you down—thumbs digging gently into your hips as his mouth presses deeper into your cunt. your fingers tangle in the sheets, pulling, grasping for something solid while your other hand drifts down, finding his hair. it’s soft between your fingers, slightly damp with sweat, and when you tug—just a little—he groans into you, the sound low and filthy and hungry. his tongue circles your clit again and again, steady now, stroking over it with slow, wet flicks that make your mouth fall open. the moan that leaves you isn’t small. it’s not shy. it spills from your throat like it was dragged out of you—“jake…”—half gasp, half prayer. and the second he hears it, the second his name hits the air in your voice like that, he moans right back into your cunt like it’s the only answer that matters.
you don’t even realize you’re saying it again, softer now, drawn out between whimpers—jake, jake, jake—like it’s the only word left in your vocabulary. he eats it up with the same hunger he’s pouring into you, his mouth messier now, wetter, his tongue stroking faster, flicking tighter, sucking your clit between his lips just long enough to make your toes curl. his hands stay strong on your thighs, holding them open as your legs tremble, as your hips start to roll despite you, chasing that edge all over again. he keeps murmuring praise between every kiss, every stroke—“that’s it, baby,” “so fucking good,” “you taste unreal,”—his voice wrecked and reverent and barely keeping it together. when you start to fall apart, when the pressure coils hard and sharp in your belly, your voice goes higher, moaning for him shamelessly now, breathless and open and wrecked. “oh my god—jake, please,” you gasp, your fingers tightening in his hair, your hips twitching in his grip. he growls at that, the sound raw and desperate, and then his mouth is on your clit again, tongue flattening over it and fucking staying there, licking in fast, perfect circles while your thighs shake and your moans turn frantic.
“come for me, baby,” he pants, his lips brushing against your soaked skin. “let me hear it—wanna hear how you sound when you fall apart for me.”
you break on the next stroke.
your whole body locks up, pleasure slicing through your spine like lightning, and your mouth falls open in a long, broken moan of his name—“jake—fuck, oh my god, jake—”—as your back arches off the bed and your hands clutch at anything you can reach. your thighs tremble around his head, your walls clench hard, and you come with a cry that sounds like it’s been waiting inside you for days. he doesn’t stop. not for a second. he keeps licking you through it, slower now, softer, coaxing every last twitch from your body until you're shaking and breathless and barely able to form words.
and still—he presses one last kiss to your clit, gentle, almost sweet.
“good girl,” he breathes, his voice thick and wrecked. “you’re perfect.”
he doesn’t rush. even now, with your legs spread wide and your body soft and trembling beneath him, he moves slow—like every second he doesn’t slide inside you is one more second he gets to feel your skin pressed under his palms, your chest rising with every breath he pulls from you. he’s fully naked, warm and flushed and heavy above you, but the weight of him hasn’t settled yet. not fully. not where you need it. his cock rests against your inner thigh, thick and hot, dragging lightly against your skin as he leans back in to kiss you again. it’s messier now—your lips parting on instinct, tongue sliding against his, all wet mouth and shaky breath while his hands roam up and down your sides like he still can’t get enough. and he can’t. you feel it in the way his hips roll forward once, lazy and deliberate, grinding his cock up against your pussy, sliding through your slick folds without breaching. it makes you gasp into his mouth, your body jolting up to meet him, but he pulls back just enough to murmur against your lips.
“not yet,” he breathes, voice warm and wrecked. “wanna feel you like this first.”
his hips roll again, slower this time, and the head of his cock drags perfectly over your clit—so slow it makes your toes curl. you whine softly, your hands slipping down to his waist, fingers digging into his skin as your hips twitch up, chasing the pressure. he lets out a soft laugh, barely there, and does it again, grinding into you just right so that your pussy clenches around nothing, needy and aching. “so wet for me,” he mutters, eyes flicking down between your bodies. “i could come from this alone… just sliding through your slick like that.” and he does it again, and again, letting the weight of him press into your core, the thick heat of his cock gliding against your folds like he’s teasing both of you to the edge. your breath starts to break—soft moans, high whimpers, every little sound begging him without saying it outright. he presses his forehead to yours, eyes fluttering shut, and keeps grinding, soft and deep and slow. “feels so fucking good, baby,” he whispers, “can you feel how bad i want you?”
you nod quickly, voice gone, mouth open, just gasping as he drags his cock back and forth through your folds—so close, so maddeningly close, like he’s letting your body know what’s coming without giving in yet. he angles his hips slightly, the head catching just barely at your entrance, and you arch up with a breathless moan. “jake—please,” you whimper, finally saying it, finally breaking. “i can’t take it, i need you inside.”
he groans at that—deep and wrecked and relieved, like he’s been holding back just for this moment. “i got you,” he breathes, dropping a kiss to your temple, your cheek, your mouth. “i’ll give it to you, baby. nice and slow.”
but still, he doesn’t push in yet.
he kisses down your throat instead, mouth dragging over your collarbone, hands sliding under your back to lift you up into him. you feel the weight of him grind down again, cock pressing into your clit in slow, soaking circles, and it makes you cry out—your whole body arching, thighs shaking, breathless and so fucking full of want you could scream.
and just when you think you’ll break—
he lifts his head, looks you in the eye, and whispers:
“tell me you want all of it.”
you’re already nodding before the words fully leave his mouth, breath stuttering in your throat as you stare up at him—eyes wide, lips parted, body shaking. “i want it,” you gasp, voice thin and desperate and completely raw. “i want all of it, jake. please.” your thighs tremble around his hips, every inch of your skin buzzing with heat, slick and open and so ready, and he groans at the sound of your voice, the way your hips roll up against him like you can’t take one more second of being empty. he leans down and kisses you—hard this time, full of tongue and breath and heat—while one hand slips beneath your thigh and the other wraps around the base of his cock, guiding it down through your folds again. you feel the thick head catch at your entrance, and you suck in a breath, your hands clutching at his arms as your body braces. “you sure?” he murmurs, lips brushing yours. “because once i’m in you… i’m not stopping.”
you can’t even speak—just whimper a soft, broken “yes,” and that’s all he needs.
he pushes in just barely, the head stretching you open slow, and you cry out, hands flying to his shoulders as your walls pulse and flutter around the thick pressure. he holds himself there, not moving yet, just groaning through gritted teeth as your pussy clenches down on the first inch like it doesn’t want to let him go. “fuck, baby,” he hisses, voice shaking now, “you’re so tight… you’re gonna ruin me.” his lips find yours again, messier now, more urgent, like kissing you is the only thing keeping him from thrusting in all at once. he moves his hips the tiniest bit, rocking forward and back, just shallow enough to make you feel every ridge, every thick vein dragging through your entrance while he holds back the rest. your body arches under him, legs wrapping tighter, hips lifting like you’re begging to be filled completely. “more,” you whisper, voice wrecked and pleading. “please, jake, more.”
he moans into your mouth like you just punched the air out of his lungs, and he gives it to you.
slow, deep, dragging—he pushes in another inch, then another, thick and hot and so much, and your body shakes from the stretch, your breath catching on a broken moan as you feel yourself wrap around him. he’s breathing hard now, forehead pressed to yours, his arms trembling as he fights to stay slow, to feel every second. “you feel like heaven,” he whispers, voice wrecked, “like you were made for me.” your nails drag down his back, your legs spread wider, and when he finally bottoms out—hips flush against yours, cock buried fully inside—you both just breathe. heavy and slow. your walls clench around him hard and he groans deep in his chest, mouth dropping to your neck like he needs to hide there just to survive it. “so fucking good,” he mutters, pressing kisses along your throat. “so tight, baby. you’re perfect.”
and all you can do is moan—soft, desperate, full of him—because you’ve never felt this full. this warm. this wanted.
he doesn’t move at first. not right away. just stays there inside you, thick and throbbing, letting your body get used to the way he stretches you open in a way that feels impossibly full. your walls pulse around him, tight and slick, clenching with every heartbeat as he breathes heavy against your skin, forehead pressed to yours like he’s anchoring himself to the feel of you. your hands find his back again, sliding up his shoulders and into his hair, and the second your fingers tangle at the base of his neck, he groans—soft and guttural—like it gives him permission to fall apart. he kisses you again, deep and messy, tongue sweeping slow against yours while his hips finally begin to roll back, just an inch, just enough to make you gasp from the sudden, aching drag of his cock inside you. he thrusts forward again—slow, thick, deliberate—and you whimper into his mouth, your body jolting from the depth. “that’s it,” he murmurs, his lips brushing yours, “just like that, baby… fuck, you feel so good.”
he keeps it slow at first—each thrust steady and deep, hips rolling into you like he’s trying to grind the shape of himself into your body. every time he pulls out, it’s only halfway, just enough to make you feel the absence before he’s pushing back in again, thick and perfect, hitting deep in a way that makes your whole body tremble. your moans come easier now, breathless and raw, spilling from your lips every time his hips meet yours with a soft smack that sounds so filthy in the quiet room. he buries his face in your neck, kissing and panting between your moans, and you can hear how wrecked he is—his voice cracking, his breath shaky, his restraint unraveling with every stroke. “you were made for this,” he gasps, his hand slipping down to grip your thigh, spreading you wider as he fucks deeper. “made to take me… fuck, baby, i can feel you squeezing me.” your head falls back into the pillows, your mouth open, your hands gripping at his back like you don’t know what else to hold onto. and still—he moves slow. still—he keeps it deep. still—he fucks you like he’s worshipping something sacred.
“say my name,” he breathes against your ear, hips dragging through you again. “wanna hear you say it while i’m inside you.”
“jake,” you whisper, breath broken and needy, barely catching the syllables between moans as your hips roll up to meet his. the way you say it—high, sweet, desperate—makes him groan low and deep in his chest, his body pressing tighter against yours like he’s trying to crawl inside you completely. “again,” he murmurs, voice cracked and shaking, “say it again for me.” you do—again, and again, each repetition softer and more ruined than the last until his name is all you can breathe, all you can cling to. his pace doesn’t change—he keeps it slow, keeps it deep, dragging every thrust out like it’s meant to leave an echo inside you. your legs fall open wider, thighs shaking with every roll of his hips, and he slips one hand under your knee, lifting it gently so he can fuck into you at a new angle, thicker, closer, impossibly deep. you cry out at the shift, your fingers digging into his shoulder blades, and his mouth finds yours again, swallowing your moans as he fills you to the hilt. “that’s my girl,” he breathes, forehead pressed to yours, “taking it so good for me. so fucking perfect.”
he’s starting to lose it—you can feel it in the way his rhythm falters for half a second, his hips jerking just slightly harder before he reins it back in. his abs are tight, his arms trembling where they hold you, but he doesn’t let go of the pace. he keeps it slow, because he wants to feel it. wants to memorize the drag of your walls around him, the way your body shakes every time he bottoms out, the way you moan his name like he’s the only thing in the world that matters. he brings his hand to your jaw, holding you still, making you look at him, and when your eyes lock, his hips roll again—slow and deep and perfect, and you both groan like it hurts to be this close. “don’t wanna come yet,” he murmurs, lips brushing yours. “wanna stay like this. wanna feel you forever.” your heart stutters at that—not just from the words, but the way he says them, like it’s not even about the scene anymore. like he means it. like he’d stay inside you forever if you let him
he holds the rhythm. slow, deep, devastating. every thrust rolls into you with a weight that feels heavier than just his body—it feels like intent, like worship, like every drag of his cock is him telling you i don’t want to forget this. your body rocks with every movement, thighs trembling around his hips, chest pressed flush against his as he kisses you again and again, tongues slow, mouths warm, breath shared like it’s sacred. his hand stays on your jaw, thumb brushing your cheek, keeping your eyes locked on his, like he can’t stand to look away while he’s inside you like this. “you feel so good,” he whispers, his voice broken, reverent. “fuck, baby, you don’t even know—i could stay buried in you all fucking night.” his thrusts stay measured, smooth, dragging against your walls with that thick, perfect pressure that makes you moan with every stroke, makes you arch into him like your body can’t decide if it needs to get closer or fall apart entirely.
you moan for him again—his name, soft and ruined—and he groans deep in his throat, jaw tightening as his hips roll forward with a little more weight, a little more urgency. he still doesn’t speed up. he’s holding it back. barely. his brows are furrowed now, sweat beading at his hairline, his body straining with the effort to keep fucking you slow when every part of him wants to sink into you harder. “you’re so fucking warm,” he breathes, almost delirious. “so wet… so tight around me, baby, i don’t—” he cuts himself off with a kiss, mouth crashing into yours as his hands grip your hips tighter, grounding himself before he loses it completely. he pulls back after a moment, panting, forehead pressed to yours. “you feel this?” he mutters, giving you a particularly deep grind that makes your toes curl. “you feel how perfect we fit?”
and you do.
you feel everything. the weight of him, the stretch, the heat, the unbearable pleasure building from how slow and thick he’s giving it to you. and it’s too much. it’s not enough.
“jake,” you moan, breath shaky, hands clutching at his shoulders. “please…”
his eyes snap to yours, wide, hungry. “what is it, baby? tell me.”
you breathe hard, your chest rising against his, voice thin as you whisper, “please… fuck me harder.”
his breath catches. his whole body stills. and then—he smiles.
“you sure?” he asks, but his voice is already different—deeper, darker, more undone.
you nod, biting your lip. “please. i need it.”
he lets out a breath like he’s been holding it the entire time, and his hands slide down your hips, gripping hard, dragging you further down the bed until your legs fall wide open again. he shifts his weight, plants his knees, and pulls his hips back slow—so slow—until just the thick head of his cock stays tucked inside you. and then he drives back in.
hard.
your mouth falls open in a cry, your fingers clawing at his back as he fucks into you with a force that knocks the air from your lungs. it’s not rough—not like pain—but it’s urgent. desperate. full of everything he’s been holding back. his hips snap forward again, and again, and your body rocks with each thrust, wet sounds filling the room now, loud and raw and obscene. your pussy clenches hard around him, every drag of his cock making your nerves light up, and you cry out his name over and over, babbling now, incoherent. “jake, fuck, fuck—yes, please, don’t stop—”
“that’s it,” he growls, his voice wrecked. “take it. take all of it, baby. this is what you wanted, right?” he fucks into you deeper, harder, the mattress groaning beneath you, your legs spread wide as he slams into you again and again, hips meeting yours with thick, filthy sounds that echo through the room. “you begged for this. and now you’ve got it.” he leans over you again, one hand braced beside your head, the other gripping your thigh, and he starts fucking down into you like he means it—deep and hard and fast, his name still falling from your lips like prayer.
your back arches, your body shaking, the pressure building again—faster this time, sharper, unbearable.
he feels it. he knows.
“you gonna come for me again?” he gasps, his voice all praise and breath and heat. “you gonna let me feel you break on my cock, baby?”
“yes—” you cry, voice catching. “i’m so close, jake, i—fuck, i’m gonna—”
“do it,” he groans. “come on. let go. let me feel it.”
and when you do—it hits hard. it slams through you like heat and lightning, your whole body seizing up around him as you come hard, crying out his name like it’s the only word you’ve ever known. your thighs shake, your stomach clenches, and your pussy pulses around his cock so tight it makes him choke on a moan and drop his head to your shoulder.
he doesn’t stop moving. doesn’t stop praising you. just fucks you through it, slower now, kissing your jaw, your cheek, your mouth.
“that’s it,” he whispers. “my good girl. so perfect for me.”
he doesn’t pull out. doesn’t even move. just stays there, buried inside you, thick and pulsing, while your body shakes around him in the aftershocks of your orgasm. you’re still gasping, your limbs loose, slick and soaked beneath him, and he’s breathing so hard it sounds like it hurts to hold back. his hand comes up to your face again, brushing your hair out of your eyes, thumb dragging down your cheekbone with the kind of tenderness that makes you ache. “fuck,” he breathes, voice wrecked. “you feel so good… i don’t wanna stop.” his forehead presses to yours, soft and warm, and he kisses you—slow, open-mouthed, like it’s not enough to just be inside you, like he needs every part of you at once. you can feel him twitching inside you, so close to the edge, but he doesn’t chase it. not yet. he grinds into you slowly, hips rolling instead of thrusting, drawing out every last ounce of pleasure from your overworked body. “can’t believe how good you feel,” he murmurs, almost to himself, “how good you sound. how good you fucking take me.”
his voice cracks a little, and his rhythm falters.
he’s close. you can feel it in the way his abs tighten, the way his hands tremble where they’re gripping your hips, the way his cock throbs inside you with every slow grind. he tries to hold on—god, he tries—but the way you moan for him, the way your body still clenches around him even after you’ve come, it’s breaking his restraint in pieces. “shit,” he gasps, pulling back just slightly, the drag of his cock making your body jump. “i’m not gonna last, baby. i need—fuck, i need to—” and then he stops. pulls out fast, thick length slipping from your soaked pussy with a slick sound that makes your thighs twitch. “turn over,” he says, voice deep and trembling. “now.”
you don’t even think. you flip over onto your stomach, dazed and dizzy and breathless, and barely have time to gasp before you feel him again—his hands on your ass, spreading you open just slightly, his cock heavy and hot as it presses between your cheeks. and then he groans—loud, broken—and you feel it, all of it, hot and thick as he comes across your lower back in long, pulsing waves. it hits your skin in slow, sticky ropes, and the sound he makes—the sound—is something you’ll never forget. he moans your name as he spills over you, hips jerking, breath catching, body finally giving in after holding it back for so long. “fuck, baby, fuck—look what you do to me,” he groans, hips stuttering, hands still gripping your thighs like he doesn’t want to let go. you tremble beneath him, face turned to the side, lips parted, chest rising in shallow pants as you feel the heat of him drip down your spine.
and then—you feel him move.
he leans over you, kissing your shoulder, your neck, the shell of your ear. “don’t think i’m done with you yet,” he whispers, voice low and ragged. “you’re not getting away that easy.”
before you can respond, his hands slide down your sides again, guiding your hips up just enough to tilt your ass higher into the air. you feel his cock again, still hard, still slick, pressing against your entrance—and he slides back in with one slow, deep thrust. you both moan at the same time, loud and breathless, your hands fisting the sheets as he sinks into you from behind. he’s deeper now, the angle sharper, the stretch more intense, and you feel it everywhere—your spine, your belly, your throat. his hands grip your waist tight, thumbs pressing into your back, and he doesn’t wait this time. he fucks. slow but firm, hips snapping into you with rhythm and purpose, the sound of skin on skin filling the room again. you’re already close again, already gasping, and so is he. every sound you make pushes him deeper, every cry of his name makes him move faster, and still—he whispers, “you feel like heaven,” like he’s praying, like he’s thanking you for letting him stay inside you again.
he doesn’t ease up—can’t. not with the way your body feels around him now, wet and open, slick with his cum still dripping from your back, every squeeze of your walls dragging a groan from his throat that sounds more animal than human. he’s locked in, one hand tight on your hip, the other dragging up your spine to press gently between your shoulder blades, guiding your chest back down to the sheets as he fucks you deeper. each thrust is thick and full and sharp, his hips smacking against your ass, his cock dragging perfectly through the mess between your thighs. “god, baby,” he moans, completely gone now, “you’re gonna make me come again—can’t even fucking think.” your moans rise with his, broken and high, your arms trembling where they’re braced beneath you, your voice too wrecked to form anything more than his name. jake, jake, jake, like it’s the only word your mouth remembers.
he leans forward, his chest brushing your back, his lips pressing hot and desperate at the curve of your shoulder. “you close again?” he whispers, voice hoarse and breathless. “feels like you’re gonna break for me again—fuck, i can feel it.” his cock grinds deep inside you, slow and dragging for just a second, and your whole body jerks, your legs trembling. “please,” you gasp, voice caught between sob and moan, “don’t stop—don’t stop—” and he doesn’t. he grabs your hips tighter, pulls you back into him harder, and fucks you through it—relentless and focused, every stroke hitting just right, every sound echoing in the air like it’s only meant for the two of you. his breathing turns ragged again, sharp exhales mixing with soft curses and your name repeated like a chant, and your body starts to fall apart beneath him, spine curving, thighs twitching, breath breaking with every roll of his hips.
the pressure builds fast—hot and high and impossible, curling tight in your stomach, crashing through your nerves until it bursts. you come with a cry, hands fisting the sheets, your body locking down around him like it’s trying to pull him even deeper. your moans get higher, needier, your cunt fluttering wildly around his cock as he fucks you through it, shaking and soaking, so wet now that every thrust is slick and loud and perfect. “that’s it,” he growls, so close, barely holding on. “come for me, baby—fuck—so tight—so good—mine—”
and he comes again, groaning loud and raw, hips slamming into you one last time as he spills deep inside. you feel it hit, hot and thick, flooding your cunt in slow pulses, dripping out around his cock as he grinds in and stays there, breathing hard, whole body shaking. he doesn’t move. doesn’t say anything right away. just stays inside you, buried, panting over your back, lips pressing kisses to your shoulder while his cum leaks out of you onto the sheets below.
neither of you says anything right away. you can feel his heart pounding against your back, fast and unsteady, matching the rhythm of your own as the last of the tremors roll through your body. the room is quiet except for your breathing—heavy and soft, shared in the space between your bodies. you’re limp beneath him, your cheek turned to the side, face buried into the sheets, completely undone, and he doesn’t rush to move. doesn’t rush to pull out. he just leans down and kisses your spine, one kiss at a time, slow and sweet and almost grateful. “you did so good,” he whispers, lips dragging along your shoulder. “so fucking good for me, baby.”
he pulls out gently, slow enough that you whimper at the loss, and his hands are on you right away—rubbing soft circles into your hips, grounding you. you feel him shift off the bed for a moment, his absence barely a few seconds before he’s back again, kneeling beside you with something warm in his hands. “gonna clean you up, okay?” he murmurs, and you nod, weak and breathless, your body still buzzing from everything he gave you. the cloth is warm and damp, and he’s so gentle with it—wiping between your thighs, along your back, between your legs—his touch careful, reverent, like you’re something fragile. he kisses every part he touches, murmuring soft praise under his breath—“still shaking,” “so pretty like this,” “wish you could see yourself right now.”
when he’s done, he tosses the cloth aside and slides back into bed, pulling the covers over both of you before wrapping an arm around your waist and tugging you close. your body fits against his like you were molded to rest there, your back to his chest, his legs tangled with yours. his hand strokes along your stomach, up to your ribs, then back down again, lazy and comforting. “was that okay?” he whispers, lips brushing your ear. “not too much?” you shake your head, letting your fingers wrap around his at your waist, holding him there. “perfect,” you murmur, voice hoarse and quiet. “you were perfect.”
he kisses your temple. “so were you.”
and he stays like that—pressed to your back, arms around you, his breath slow and even—until the heat fades from your skin and your body finally lets itself rest. but even then, he doesn’t let go.
he just holds you.
—-
the knock at the door came like a whisper against the quiet, just loud enough to be heard but soft enough to feel hesitant—like whoever was behind it wasn’t entirely sure they wanted to be let in. heeseung lifted his head, glancing up from the dim silence of the living room, his phone idle beside him on the cushion, screen black, unread messages tucked away and ignored. he didn’t answer at first. he just stared toward the door for a beat too long, then finally pushed himself up with a sigh that felt older than it should’ve. he walked slowly, deliberately, and when he opened the door, the hallway light spilled in and outlined sunghoon in its glow—hood up, hands shoved into his jacket pockets, eyes shadowed beneath the brim. he didn’t look angry. didn’t look anything. just stood there with a stillness that said more than his face ever could.
heeseung stepped aside without a word. sunghoon brushed past him and into the apartment like it wasn’t the first time—but it wasn’t casual. it wasn’t routine. the room felt colder the second he entered.
jay was already there. hunched low in the corner of the couch, elbows planted on his knees, fingers raking over his scalp like he was trying to scrub thoughts out of his own skull. his head lifted only slightly when sunghoon walked in, eyes dull, expression unreadable. he nodded in acknowledgment but didn’t speak.
the silence was thick—uncomfortably so. it stretched like something alive, something waiting to snap. sunghoon didn’t sit. he hovered at the edge of the couch, eyes darting from jay to heeseung, and finally broke it.
“what’s going on?”
the question was soft. flat. but it cut straight through the weight in the room.
jay exhaled, deep and ragged, and let his hands fall between his knees, fingers laced, knuckles pale from the tightness of his grip. he stared at the carpet for a second too long before sitting up, shoulders tense, like what he was about to say had been pressing against his ribs for days. “i got caught up in something,” he said, voice low, like he wasn’t sure if he was confessing or just trying to hear it said out loud. “someone.”
he didn’t look at either of them when he said it. just kept his eyes trained downward, like the words were heavier that way.
“you say that like it’s new,” sunghoon replied, his tone unreadable.
jay let out a short breath—half a scoff, half a sigh. “it’s not. i just didn’t think it would… i don’t know. i didn’t think it would matter.”
heeseung shifted slightly against the door, arms crossed now, gaze sharper, quieter. he wasn’t speaking, but he was listening in a way that made the room feel smaller.
jay leaned back against the couch, one hand over his mouth for a second before he finally said it. “i worked with her.”
the air shifted. slightly. just enough.
“thought it’d be just one collab. she was shy. real quiet. but then… she came over. we talked. she opened up a little.” his voice cracked faintly at the edge. “it felt different.”
“different how?” heeseung asked, still calm, but tighter now—his voice like a thread pulled taut between two fingers.
jay shrugged, jaw working silently before he answered. “like i didn’t want it to be just once.”
no one spoke for a moment. the quiet settled like a fog.
“we had dinner. we filmed. she stayed over,” jay continued, softer now. “but we didn’t—i mean, we could’ve, but we didn’t. she fell asleep next to me. i woke up and she was gone.”
heeseung’s eyes didn’t move from him. his posture hadn’t changed, but something in the stillness of his face felt heavier.
sunghoon didn’t look surprised. just tired.
jay raked a hand through his hair again and let it fall with a frustrated sigh. “i don’t know what the fuck i’m doing. i just… can’t stop thinking about her.”
and then it slipped.
“y/n’s not like anyone else,” jay muttered, not even realizing what he’d said until the room went dead still.
heeseung blinked.
“what?” he asked, too calm. too quiet.
jay blinked back, slow, the words hanging in the air.
“what name did you just say?” heeseung asked again, but there was something different in his voice now—sharp, coiled, the kind of calm that cracked open just before it exploded.
jay’s mouth parted. then closed. then opened again. “i—I didn’t mean to say it like that.”
heeseung pushed off the wall. straightened his back. the air around him shifted, like gravity had thickened.
“what name,” he said, his voice cold now, “did you just say?”
jay swallowed. “y/n.”
“there’s no fucking way…” heeseung mutters, his voice low and tight, like it’s being dragged from somewhere deep in his chest. his eyes don’t leave jay’s, narrowed and dark, his brows drawn so tightly together that the lines across his forehead seem carved in place. you can see the way his chest rises, too slow, too strained, like every second is squeezing around his ribs, making it harder to breathe. he’s still, but the tension in his body is loud—the kind that makes the room feel smaller, like it’s closing in on itself.
“what is it?” jay asks, his voice sharp, suspicious, but there’s a flicker of hesitation behind it. his gaze darts across heeseung’s face, searching for something unspoken, but the way heeseung is staring—straight through him—tells him everything. he already knows. and when heeseung doesn’t answer right away, jay’s jaw tenses. “you fucking know her?” he snaps, rising from the couch, his movements quick and uneven. “you know who she is?”
heeseung finally stands, slow and deliberate, like he’s been holding this in too long. “i knew her before you,” he says, his voice flat but heavy. “she’s the one who’s been fucking with my head. she’s the one who’s had me up at night wondering why the hell i can’t stop thinking about her.” his words hang thick in the air, and jay just stares at him, pacing now, hands flexing at his sides like he doesn’t know what to do with them.
the silence that follows makes the walls feel like they’re closing in. the atmosphere shifts—denser, more volatile—and sunghoon feels it settle in his chest like smoke. he glances between the two of them, their body language sharp and unreadable, like wires pulled too tight. “who the hell are you two talking about?” he asks, breaking the silence, but the question lands flat—ignored, unanswered—because heeseung’s voice cuts back in before either of them can acknowledge him.
“cut it off,” heeseung says suddenly, voice low and cold. “don’t talk to her again.”
jay stops moving.
he turns slowly, his brows furrowing deep, disbelief flashing across his face as he steps toward heeseung. “who the fuck do you think you are?” he says, and there’s no humor in it. “you don’t get to make that call. i’m not cutting shit off.”
they stare at each other, heat rising between them in silence, and for a second jay doesn’t even know how to feel—jealous? betrayed? inferior? he doesn’t know what hurts more, the fact that heeseung knew first or that heeseung felt it first. that he’s not the only one obsessed with you. not the only one caught in whatever spell you’ve put over them.
sunghoon finally realizes—this isn’t just about a collab. this isn’t casual. this isn’t temporary. they’re not just pissed because they crossed wires. they’re fighting over a woman. and not just any woman. someone who’s turned both of them into something possessive, reckless, different. his brows furrow slightly, mouth parting, but no words come. curiosity simmers quietly in his chest, rising higher with every second. they’ve never fought over a girl before. never even talked like this over someone they’ve filmed with. but something about you has them both breaking rules they never thought they’d cross.
and now he’s wondering—what is it about her?
sunghoon stays quiet for a beat longer, his eyes flicking between the two men standing across from each other like they’re one word away from something irreversible. heeseung’s jaw is clenched, his fists tight at his sides, like he’s holding himself back from saying more. jay, on the other hand, looks seconds from exploding—like the wrong breath would set him off. and in the middle of it all, sunghoon feels something else creep in through the cracks of the tension: curiosity. it had started small, a flicker when he heard the name. when he realized they weren’t talking about just anyone. when he watched heeseung stand like that, sharp and focused, and jay snap like something had been stolen from him. it wasn’t just jealousy. it wasn’t pride. it was obsession.
so he speaks.
“what’s her username?”
jay looks over sharply, brows furrowed. “what?”
“the girl,” sunghoon says, voice low but steady. “you’re both clearly ready to fight over her. i just wanna know what she looks like.”
heeseung scoffs quietly, shaking his head as he starts to pace, like the idea of pulling another person into this makes his skin itch. “don’t,” he mutters. “you don’t wanna get involved.”
sunghoon shrugs, but his tone stays even. “maybe i do.”
jay watches him for a moment, his mouth a tight line, fingers twitching at his sides like he’s trying to decide whether to laugh or warn him. “you’re not curious,” he says, almost accusing. 
“but what if i am?,” sunghoon replies, tilting his head slightly. “you two ever been like this over someone before?” he waits a beat, lets the silence answer him. “exactly. so if this is how you act… i just wanna see who she is.”
heeseung stops pacing. his shoulders are tense, his eyes dark as they lock onto sunghoon’s. “it’s not about how she looks.”
“then what is it?” sunghoon asks, and his voice is quiet, but it’s not soft. “because you’re both standing here ready to lose your shit over someone who none of us even knew existed a few weeks ago.”
jay doesn’t answer. not at first. he sits down instead, jaw still tight, staring at the floor like the answer is there if he just thinks hard enough.
“she’s different,” he finally says, voice low. “the way she talks. the way she films. the way she looks at you like she already knows what you’re gonna ask for, and gives it to you before you say it.”
heeseung nods slowly, almost without realizing. “she gets under your skin,” he murmurs. “and you don’t even notice until you’re in too deep.”
sunghoon watches them both—his friends, his brothers, suddenly strangers with wounds he didn’t know they had. and instead of pulling away, something in him leans closer.
“i want in,” he says, soft but certain.
heeseung turns to him, eyes narrowing. “don’t.”
“why not?”
“because you’ll end up just like us,” jay mutters. “and none of us know what the fuck we’re doing.”
but sunghoon just smiles, slow and calculated. “maybe i want to find out.”
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natty's notesᝰ.ᐟ i'm backkkk ! was too excited to upload this to you all so if there's mistakes, so sorry i did not proofread it >.<
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delulumel ¡ 2 months ago
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I need to experience this😭
somehow, you. | jungkook au
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⋆. 𐙚 ̊ summary: he was the quiet one in class. the type who never talked unless called on, who looked at the world from behind thick-rimmed glasses and stayed out of everyone’s way. you? you were the girl everyone knew. the one who never let anyone in. you weren’t looking for connection, and he wasn’t the kind to ask for it. but still… he did. and somehow, it worked.
ratings: 18+
pairing: jungkook x fem reader
genre: college AU, emotional intimacy, slightly slow burned.
warnings: explicit sexual content including unprotected sex (not advised), soft but possessive dirty talk, emotional vulnerability, praise, mild insecurity and reassurance, and a rough but tender dynamic in an established relationship. and ofc…big dicc jungkook cause UGH.
word count: 5.2k
a/n: hi! ok so. this is my very first fic i’m posting and i’m actually kind of losing my mind about it?? originally it was supposed to be two parts (pt.1 soft, pt.2 smut) but i got carried away and ended up writing it all in one go because i wouldn’t shut up abt this two!!
*banners/dividers credits to the owners ♡ ྀི
thank you for reading!! leave your comments on what u think of my first fic 🥺! 🤍 - Sher
requests are officially opened!
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The classroom always smelled like old air and pen inks, a familiar background hum to every forgettable weekday morning.
You sat at the back, as always, where you could stretch your legs, twirl your pen, and zone out without anyone bothering you. People knew you, too well.
Not because you tried, but because the world couldn’t help but notice the girl who always seemed a little untouchable.
Then the teacher changed the seating plan.
“Jeon Jungkook. You’re moving to the back, beside her.”
A ripple of murmurs went through the class, subtle but present. You could feel the stares. You looked up just in time to see him glance nervously your way before lowering his eyes and walking toward the seat beside you.
Jungkook. Everyone knew who he was, even if he rarely spoke. Top of the class. Never late. Always dressed clean, minimal, quiet. You didn’t expect anything from him. Didn’t need another nerdy guy going stiff just because you shared a desk.
But that day, he surprised you.
He sat down carefully, barely making a sound, and opened his book. No fidgeting. No glances. Just… stillness. Until you heard the smallest breath of a murmur.
“Chapter’s interesting,” he said, eyes still on the page.
You blinked.
“What?”
He didn’t flinch. “The reading. It’s good. Surprising, kind of.”
You studied him, confused. He hadn’t even looked at you. It was like he wasn’t trying to talk to you—just thinking aloud, and you happened to hear.
You didn’t answer.
But your curiosity flickered.
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹ꮺ˚
The next few days, he didn’t speak again. But he was always on time. Always with his notebook perfectly aligned. Always glancing at your desk when he thought you weren’t looking—quick, nervous flicks of his eyes.
Then came the Wednesday.
You’d forgotten your pens, bag full of it. Not on purpose—just one of those mornings where you left everything behind. You muttered something under your breath, frustrated, and slammed your bag down.
Before you could think to dig through your things again, a sleek black pen rolled across your desk.
You turned. Jungkook was still facing forward, penless himself now.
“You sure?” you asked, surprised.
He nodded once. “I have another.”
You waited for a smile. A joke. Some kind of flirtation.
Nothing.
Just a calm silence.
It threw you off more than someone asking for your number ever could.
Then came the Thursday rainstorm.
You stayed behind after class, waiting for it to ease, stuck at the school’s entrance while thunder rumbled in the distance. Everyone else had already left, except for him.
He walked up beside you without a word, holding an umbrella. For a second, you thought he was going to walk past.
He hesitated.
“You live near East Gate, right?” he asked, voice low, eyes on the rain.
You narrowed your eyes. “How do you know that?”
He shrugged. “I’ve seen you leave that way. Every day.”
You didn’t answer.
He tilted the umbrella slightly toward you. “Come on.”
You stared at him like he’d grown two heads. But you followed.
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹ꮺ˚
That walk changed everything.
He didn’t try to impress you. Didn’t pry. Just walked beside you, holding the umbrella with quiet precision to make sure it covered you both.
When you reached your turn, you stopped.
“Why’re you doing this?” you asked, genuinely confused.
He paused. Looked at you for the first time, really looked—eyes soft behind his wet fringe.
“Because you look like no one ever asks how you’re doing,” he said. “And i kind of want to.”
You stood frozen as he walked away, raindrops hitting your shoulders after the umbrella disappeared with him down the path.
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹ꮺ˚
From then on, he became your quiet shadow.
Always beside you in class. Always one step behind in the hallway. But not in a clingy way. He respected your space but showed up when it mattered.
One morning, you came in late, eyes puffy from a night you didn’t want to talk about. You slumped into your chair, hoodie up, bare faced (that rarely happens whenever you go to class) sleeves tugged over your hands.
He didn’t say anything.
But when you finally looked at your desk, there was a folded note, written in perfect; clean handwriting.
“It’s okay to have days like this. You’re allowed to fall apart sometimes. I’ve got notes if you need them.”
You folded the paper slowly. Pressed your lips together. And something inside you melted.
You weren’t used to being seen like that.
You weren’t used to someone not asking for anything in return.
That day, you turned to him and whispered, “Thanks.” giving him a small smile.
He looked up, startled, as if he wasn’t expecting you to respond.
And smiled, unsure, but real.
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹ꮺ˚
You think to yourself, you might fell for him. Maybe. Which is a weird feeling to you.
Given that you both barely have a proper (real) conversation.
Well you did exchange numbers—that’s because you both somehow were assigned to work together, so Jungkook thought it would be better to interact outside of class.
For study purpose of course.
Eventually both of you did text one another—occasionally. Just short texts nothing conversation worthy.
Yeah, you felt this weird butterflies.
But, you didn’t fall all at once.
It happened slowly. Over study sessions you didn’t consider were study sessions, coffee walks that became routines, quiet texts late at night when he’d ask, “Did you eat today?” and not stop asking until you said yes.
Over the time, during study sessions, you found yourself laughing around him. Trusting him.
Letting your guard down without realizing it had dropped.
One night, you asked through text, in your bed, loneliness crept again, “You know i’m kind of… a mess, right?”
He replied few seconds too fast.
“I know,” he said. “But you’re the kind of mess that makes sense to me.”
And you fell.
Quietly. Completely.
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹ꮺ˚
You weren’t sure when the lines blurred—when study sessions became excuses to sit a little closer, when shared coffee turned into shared glances, when “see you tomorrow” carried the weight of don’t forget me.
Jungkook didn’t rush anything. He never did.
But one Friday, something shifted.
He caught up with you after class, his hoodie sleeves pushed halfway up, headphones around his neck, looking nervous in a way that made your heart weirdly ache.
“Hey,” he said, walking beside you. “There’s this exhibition at the design building… the one with digital installations. I thought—maybe you’d like it.”
You turned to look at him. “You inviting me?”
He nodded, looking at the floor. “If you want. No pressure. It’s tomorrow.”
You almost teased him. Almost said something sarcastic just to keep things from feeling too serious. But something in the way he looked—open, nervous, sincere—made you soften.
“Yeah,” you said. “I’d like that.”
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹ꮺ˚
The exhibition was small. Quiet. Dreamy.
Digital light shifted across the walls like watercolor in motion. Projected clouds drifted across the floor.
Every room had its own ambient sound—soft, electronic music and echoing whispers. It should’ve felt awkward, being alone together in that hush.
But with him, it didn’t.
You stood in one of the installations surrounded by cascading lines of digital rain, blue and silver glowing all around and he looked at you like he wanted to remember the moment.
“I like this,” you said quietly.
He glanced at the ceiling, then back at you. “Me too.”
A beat passed.
“Honestly… i didn’t know if you’d say yes,” he admitted. “To coming here.”
You tilted your head. “Why not?”
He looked at you. “Because i’m not like the other people you talk to.”
“You mean the loud ones? I don’t talk to just anyone, anymore. Besides, didn’t we spend a good amount of time together for the past month to be considered as…friends?”
He smiled, barely. “Yeah. The ones who know what to say. And yeah i knew that but still, i thought it was just a study session, coffee catch ups with you—that you’d rather spend your time with your other…friends.”
You shifted your weight. “Maybe i got tired of people who always know what to say and FYI—i’d rather spend my time with you.”
Silence.
Just the sound of soft electronic rainfall.
Then he said it—so low you almost missed it:
“I really like being around you.”
You turned to him, heart suddenly too loud in your chest.
He’s so dreamy, handsome.
“I really like being around you too.”
And he looked at you like you’d just said the one thing he’d been waiting to hear.
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹ꮺ˚
Your first kiss wasn’t at the exhibition.
That night had already held enough. The way he kept sneaking glances at you while pretending to read the plaque beside a sculpture, the way his hand hovered close to yours but never quite touched.
You walked the whole gallery like that, quiet but full of something neither of you wanted to name yet.
Later, he offered to walk you home. You said yes.
The air was cold but not bitter, the city dim and quiet in that in-between hour.
Your footsteps echoed against the pavement, your breath blooming white in the air. He kept his hands in his coat pockets, close but not brushing yours.
“Did you like the exhibit?” he asked, his voice low and a little shy.
“I did,” you said. “But i think i liked walking around with you more.”
He turned his head slightly, surprised. “Yeah?”
You nodded, not looking at him. “It was… nice. I don’t usually do things like that. With people.”
Jungkook was quiet for a moment. Then “You mean dates?”
You blinked. “Was this a date?”
His voice went even softer. “I wanted it to be.”
You stopped walking. Your apartment was just ahead, but you didn’t want to go in yet. The moment felt full.
Suspended.
He looked at you, eyes searching. “Can I be honest?”
You tilted your head. “Aren’t you always?” you giggled.
He smiled faintly. “I think about you a lot more than i should.”
You swallowed. “What does that mean?”
“It means i’ve liked you for a while. Even before you started talking to me.”
“You’re not exactly… forward, you know.”
“I didn’t think i was your type.”
“You’re not,” you said simply. “At least, not what i thought my type was.”
His expression didn’t change much, but you saw the flicker of hope behind his eyes.
You glanced down at your keys, twisting them between your fingers. “You’ve been patient with me.”
“I don’t mind waiting,” he said. “But sometimes i think… i just want to know if i’m the only one feeling this.”
You looked at him then. Really looked.
His scarf was wrapped high, almost to his mouth. His cheeks were pink from the cold, eyes warm, uncertain, but wide open.
He wasn’t trying to be smooth. He wasn’t trying to win. He was just there, telling you the truth.
Then slowly and tentatively, he stepped closer, his breath shallow.
His voice barely carried “Can I kiss you?”
You felt everything in you pause.
And then “Yeah,” you said softly, heart pounding.
“Yeah, you can.”
He didn’t hesitate after that. He leaned in, hand rising to your cheek, thumb brushing gently across your skin. His lips met yours in a kiss that was soft, slow, careful.
He was learning something sacred; he didn’t want to rush what he’d waited so long to feel.
When he pulled back, your lips still tingled from the warmth of him, your chest full and fluttering.
You smiled, breath curling in the air. “You always this careful?”
His voice was low, but sure. “Only when it’s important.”
And you knew, right then, it was.
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You didn’t talk much after that kiss.
Not because it was awkward. Because it wasn’t. It was the kind of silence that wrapped itself around you like a blanket. Soft, steady, enough.
He waited for you to open the door. Didn’t push. Just gave you that small smile, the one he only ever gave you and said, “Text me when you’re inside.”
You nodded, stepped in, and closed the door.
Then leaned your forehead against it.
You were in trouble.
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹ꮺ˚
The next few days were different in all the ways that mattered.
You still sat beside each other in class. Still studied together in the library. But now there were new things. A small, subtle shifts.
His knee brushed against yours and didn’t move. He’d lean in when he spoke, voice softer. You’d catch him looking at you, and this time, you didn’t look away.
You weren’t used to this version of yourself; unguarded. And Jungkook, for all his quietness, seemed to understand that.
He never rushed you. Never asked “what are we?” or “where is this going?”
He just stayed.
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹ꮺ˚
It wasn’t planned.
The day had been normal. Classes, campus noise, another group project that had you rolling your eyes while Jungkook just quietly took notes. He always took notes, even when no one else cared. You liked that about him. You’d never told him.
You were both walking back from campus, the sky soft with evening gray, when it started to drizzle.
Jungkook held his bag over your head.
You laughed. “You know i’m not gonna melt, right?”
He just looked down at you. “You’re still cold when it rains. You get quiet.”
You didn’t answer. Mostly because he was right. You did get quiet.
And he noticed.
By the time you reached your apartment, your hair was damp, and your mood had shifted. You weren’t sad—just heavy.
One of those days. You didn’t say much as you opened the door and let him in.
Jungkook toed off his shoes carefully, still holding that nervous energy he always carried when he was in your space. You dropped your keys in the bowl by the door and stood in the kitchen, hands on the counter.
“Want tea?” you asked.
He nodded. “Yeah. That’d be nice.”
The silence between you was soft. Not tense. Just full of all the things you weren’t ready to say out loud. You made tea. He sat at the table. You sat across from him, knees brushing under the wood.
Then, out of nowhere, you said it.
“I don’t let people in.”
He looked up, startled. You weren’t looking at him—just staring into your mug.
“I don’t know how to do that,” you continued. “It’s easier when no one expects anything.”
A long pause. Then:
“I never expected anything,” he said.
You finally looked at him. He looked… calm. A little sad. But calm.
“I just liked being around you.”
You nodded slowly. “You still do?”
“Yeah,” he said. “Even more now.”
The air between you shifted. Slowed. Deepened.
And you whispered, “Stay tonight?”
He didn’t ask questions. Didn’t assume.
He just said, “Okay.”
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹ꮺ˚
You sat on the floor of your bedroom while he changed into the extra clothes you gave him. A quiet hum played from the speaker, barely audible.
When he stepped back into the room; barefoot, hoodie sleeves pushed up, eyes soft, you suddenly felt that aching fear again.
What if you messed this up?
What if it didn’t last?
And then he crossed the room and knelt in front of you.
His hand rested gently on your knee. “You don’t have to be anything for me,” he said quietly. “You don’t have to perform. Or smile. Or fix anything.”
You looked down at your lap, fighting the warmth in your throat.
“I don’t know how to do this,” you admitted.
“I’ll wait while you figure it out,” he said.
Just like that.
No grand declaration. No demand. Just steady, honest patience.
You reached for his hand.
Held it.
And when you finally crawled into bed beside him, there was no space left between you. You pressed your back to his chest, his arm wrapping loosely around your waist. His breath tickled your shoulder.
“You okay?” he whispered.
“Yeah,” you whispered back.
And you meant it.
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You woke to the quiet shift of fabric. The soft sound of him sitting up beside you.
Morning light filtered through the curtains in a pale blur. Your back was still warm from where his arm had rested. You blinked slowly, your mind caught between dreams and now.
Jungkook was already awake, hoodie wrinkled, hair messy from sleep.
He was sitting at the edge of the bed, elbows resting on his knees, his hands fidgeting with the hem of his sleeve.
He looked like he was thinking too loud.
You propped yourself up on your elbow. “Hey,” you said, voice scratchy.
He turned to you immediately, like he’d been waiting. “Hey,” he echoed. A small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth, but it didn’t reach his eyes.
You sat up slowly, pulling the blanket around your shoulders. “You okay?”
He nodded. Then shook his head. Then let out a quiet breath, like he wasn’t sure how to start.
“Can i ask you something?” he said softly.
You stilled, heart already beginning to tap faster in your chest. “Yeah.”
He looked down at his hands, picking at a loose thread on the cuff of his sleeve.
“I don’t want to ruin anything. I’m not trying to pressure you,” he started, voice careful. “But… what are we?”
You didn’t answer right away.
His eyes lifted. “I just…last night meant something to me. You mean something to me. And i know you don’t let people in easily. So i don’t want to assume anything, but i also don’t want to keep pretending this is just… nothing.”
You watched him for a moment, your throat tight.
“I didn’t think you’d ask,” you murmured.
“Why not?”
“Because you’re usually the quiet one. The patient one.”
“I still am,” he said. “But being patient doesn’t mean I’m not feeling things too.”
You swallowed, fingers tugging at the edge of the blanket. “I’m not good at this. I don’t know how to explain what i feel when i’m with you. It’s new. And a little scary.”
He nodded slowly. “Same.”
You looked at him. “But i don’t want it to be nothing either.”
Jungkook’s expression softened. “Yeah?”
You nodded, quieter this time. “Yeah.”
He shifted closer, his knee bumping gently against yours. “Then maybe… we don’t have to label it yet. But I just needed to know i wasn’t alone in it.”
“You’re not,” you said.
You meant it.
Jungkook exhaled a breath he’d been holding. Then reached out, tentative at first and he curls his fingers around yours.
“Okay,” he said, voice warm now. “Then i’m yours. However long it takes.”
You smiled, eyes stinging just a little. “You’re really not what i expected.”
He grinned—finally, fully. “I get that a lot.”
And in the quiet that followed, your fingers remained laced with his. Simple. Certain.
And for the first time in a long time, you didn’t feel like you had to run.
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It had been a month.
One month since Jungkook had leaned across your front step and kissed you like it mattered. Since he’d touched your face like he was afraid you’d vanish if he blinked too fast.
And somehow, things still felt new. Still soft. Still unreal in moments like now, with him sprawled across your bed in a hoodie, reading on his stomach, feet swaying behind him like a kid.
You were half-working on an assignment, half-watching him.
“You’re staring,” he said without looking up.
“I’m admiring,” you corrected.
He turned his head just enough to catch your smirk, then gave a small smile. “Baby,” he said under his breath, “you’re distracting.”
“You like it,” you replied, nudging his leg with your foot.
He hummed. “I do.”
⋆. 𐙚 ̊⊹���˚
Your relationship had grown into something… daily. Quiet rituals that made your chest ache. He’d walk you to class with your fingers looped in his sleeve. He’d wait for you outside the library, sipping iced coffee and reading the latest novel you lent him. You started wearing his hoodies without asking. He stopped looking surprised when you kissed his cheek mid-sentence.
But even with the sweetness, there was still something unspoken hanging between you.
Something warmer. Heavier.
Like tonight.
He was still lying on your bed when you finally gave up pretending to work and climbed over him, plopping yourself beside his back with a sigh.
He closed his book and peeked at you. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” you murmured. “You’re just comfy.”
He let out a soft laugh. “You say that every time you use me as a pillow.”
“Because it’s true, baby.”
You shifted, laying your head against his back. Your palm flattened over his spine.
Jungkook went still for a second—then melted.
“Do you…” you hesitated, unsure why your throat suddenly felt tight, “do you ever want to do more than just lie here?”
He was silent for a moment.
Then, softly: “Yeah. I do.”
You sat up a little, just enough to look at him.
His cheeks were already flushed.
“I just never know if you’re comfortable,” intertwining your fingers together.
“Or if you want to. I’ve never really… gotten this far before.” he added.
You blinked. “You haven’t?”
He shook his head. “I’ve dated a few, but it never got serious. And no one ever really looked at me like you do.”
That last part made your chest squeeze.
“You mean like you hung the stars?” you teased gently.
He smiled, eyes shy. “Kind of, yeah.”
You reached out, brushing your fingers through his hair. “You’re not the only nervous one, baby.”
“I’m not?”
You shook your head. “I’ve been with my fair share of…flings? boyfriends?, whatever you wanna call it—but it never felt right nor did it worked out, obviously. It always felt like they expected something from me. You don’t.”
Jungkook shifted, sitting up properly now. You were both facing each other, legs crossed.
“Can i ask you something?” he said quietly.
You nodded.
His voice was careful. “If we… wanted to try something. Anything. Would you tell me if you weren’t ready?”
“Always,” you promised.
He reached forward, brushing a thumb against your cheek. “Okay.”
You leaned into his palm.
And after a beat, you whispered, “Would you kiss me now?”
His lips twitched. “I’d give you anything you want.”
When he kissed you—slow and warm, one hand still cupping your jaw—it felt like everything in the world slowed down. Like it was just you and him, tangled in hush and trust.
You shifted closer, your hand slipping beneath the hem of his hoodie, resting just above his waistband. You felt him freeze, just slightly.
“Too much?” you whispered.
“No,” he breathed. “Just new.”
You smiled into the kiss. “We’ll take it slow.”
“Promise?” he breathes into the kiss.
“Promise.”
And when he pulled you fully into his lap, burying his face in your neck with a soft laugh, it felt like something more than new.
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It happened on a night that didn’t feel special; no candles, no dramatic music, just the two of you in your room after dinner, legs tangled on your bed, warm with laughter and full from pasta Jungkook had insisted on cooking himself.
He was wearing gray sweatpants and one of your oversized shirts, sleeves pushed up, his hair messily falling across his forehead.
You had just pulled him down for a kiss. Playful, slow.
But then it lingered. Deepened.
And something shifted.
His tongue slipped against yours, deliberate. His hand came up to cup the back of your neck, pulling you closer like he couldn’t help himself anymore.
When you whimpered against his lips, he pulled back slightly, gaze heavy-lidded.
“You okay?” he asked, voice low and rough.
You nodded, breathless. “Yeah. Just… wasn’t expecting you to kiss me like that.”
He brushed your cheek with his thumb. “Like what?”
“Like you’ve been waiting to.”
“I have been,” he murmured. “For so fucking long.”
Your chest tightened, breath caught in your throat.
“We’ve kissed many, many times before?,” you giggled.
And then his lips was on yours again, more desperate this time. No teasing. No question.
Jungkook leaned over you, pressing you into the mattress, his body slotting between your thighs like it was instinct.
You felt how hard he was through the thin fabric of your shorts. He wasn’t trying to hide it. He wanted you to feel it.
“Jungkook,” you breathed, tugging at his shirt. “Please.”
He sat back just enough to yank it over his head, chest rising and falling with shallow breaths. “You sure?”
“Baby,” you said, reaching for him again, “I’ve never been more sure.”
Something in his expression cracked open at that relief, hunger, something fierce and protective all at once.
“Then let me have you,” he said, voice dark, breath ragged. “Let me fuck you like you deserve.”
The way he said it; need dripping into every syllable made your whole body shudder.
He tugged your shorts down fast, your panties going with them. When you gasped, he kissed the inside of your thigh, then hovered over you again, his cock straining visibly in his sweats.
“God,” he whispered, eyes raking over you. “You’re so fucking pretty like this. Laid out for me.”
Your hands reached for him, desperate. “I want you, Jungkook. I don’t wanna wait.”
“You won’t,” he said, voice curling around you like silk and smoke.
He shoved his pants down just enough to free himself, stroking himself slowly as he stared at you.
“You’ve got no idea what you do to me,” he murmured. “No idea how long i’ve wanted to be inside you.”
You reached between your legs, spreading yourself open for him.
His mouth dropped open slightly. “Fuck.”
He lined himself up, eyes locked on yours. “Tell me if i go too fast, okay?”
You nodded, heart hammering. “I trust you.”
That did something to him.
He pushed in slow, deep, all at once.
Your breath hitched, legs trembling.
“Holy fuck,” Jungkook groaned, head falling to your shoulder. “You feel like heaven. So wet for me already.”
You clung to him, nails dragging lightly down his back.
“Move,” you gasped. “I need you.”
He obeyed without hesitation, pulling back, then slamming into you again with a rhythm that made your head spin.
It was hard and deep. Not rushed, but intentional. Like he knew exactly how to tear you apart and put you back together.
“Baby,” he breathed, panting against your throat, “you’re taking me so well.”
You moaned, legs tightening around him.
“You always this tight, or is it just for me?”
“Only you,” you choked out, voice cracking. “Only ever been like this for you.”
That made him growl.
“You feel perfect. Like you’re made for me.”
Every thrust dragged a whimper from your lips. Every kiss to your neck made you melt further under him.
You could feel how careful he was, even in the roughness. Like he wanted you to feel claimed, but not hurt. Never that.
“You like when i talk like this?” he asked, voice low in your ear.
“Yes,” you moaned. “Fuck, Jungkook.”
“You make me lose my mind, princess. Got me thinking about you all day. Couldn’t wait to fuck you full of my come inside.”
Your back arched, nails digging into his shoulders.
He shifted his hips, angling deeper. “You gonna come for me like this? Gonna come on my cock hm?”
You nodded desperately, tears brimming at the corners of your eyes. “Yes….don’t stop.”
“Look at me,” he whispered.
You did.
And in the silence that followed, he slowed down, but pressed in deep and stayed there.
His body trembled above yours, like he was holding something back—not just his release, but something heavier.
You cupped his cheek gently. “Jungkook?”
His voice broke.
“I love you,” he whispered; then again, faster, almost panicked. “I love you so much it’s scaring me.”
You stared up at him, eyes wide.
“I—” His throat worked as he swallowed, his brows drawn tight with emotion. “I never thought i’d have this. You. I never thought someone like you would ever even look at me.”
“Jungkook—”
“I used to watch you,” he continued, voice cracking. “In class. You were always so confident. So distant. But then you sat next to me—God, i still remember the way you looked that day. I thought it was a joke. Like there’s no way you would sit beside me.”
Your chest ached. He kept going.
“But you did. You stayed. You talked to me. You let me see pieces of you no one else gets to. And i still don’t know why. I still think maybe you’ll wake up and realize you could do better and just… leave.”
You shook your head, eyes stinging.
“But you don’t,” he whispered. “You stay. You’re patient with me when i get quiet. When i don’t know what to say. You still kiss me like i matter.”
His voice dropped lower, barely a breath.
“I don’t know what i did to deserve you. But fuck—i’m so glad you exist. I’m so glad you sat next to me.”
Your lips parted, but nothing came out.
He saw the silence as hesitation, and something in his face crumpled.
“It’s okay,” he said quickly, pulling back just slightly. “You don’t have to say it back. I just….i needed you to know. Even if i’m not what you expected. Even if I’m not enough.”
And that’s when it hit you.
This boy; this quiet, brilliant, soft-hearted boy had been holding it in for months.
You surged up and kissed him.
Not soft. Not gentle.
You kissed him like you were giving him an answer.
He gasped against your lips when you pulled away.
“I love you,” you whispered. “Are you kidding? You’re everything.”
He blinked, stunned.
“I didn’t say it sooner because i was scared i’d ruin this,” you said. “But Jungkook… you are everything i could ever ask for.”
He let out a shaky breath—half a laugh, half a sob—and kissed you again, deeper this time. Needy. Grateful.
You weren’t sure what hurt more. The way he was moving inside you, or the way he was looking at you.
Like you were a miracle.
Like you were something he’d never believed he could have.
Every thrust was deep, steady, but trembling with emotion. He was holding on for dear life. His forehead pressed to yours, sweat on his brow, his breath hot and uneven.
“God,” Jungkook groaned, voice raw, “you feel so good, too good.”
You cupped his face again, thumbs brushing over his flushed cheeks. “You can let go. i’ve got you.”
But he didn’t. Not yet.
“I don’t want this to end,” he whispered. “I don’t want us to end.”
“We won’t,” you said softly. “I’m right here.”
He choked on a breath, hips stuttering. “I’ve never… never loved anyone like this.”
You nodded, tears welling. “Me either.”
And still, he didn’t stop moving. He couldn’t; not when your body clung to his like a prayer, not when your nails curled against his back, not when your lips parted with little gasps that sounded like his name.
“Let go, baby,” you whispered. “I want you to come inside. Cmon baby.”
His pace faltered; sharper, desperate. “Can’t believe you’re mine,” he breathed. “Can’t believe it’s you.”
Then, with a deep groan against your neck, he finally gave in—shuddering in your arms, body tensing, spilling into you like it was all too much and not enough at once.
You held him through it.
Through the tremble in his limbs.
Through the whispered “I love you” that followed on the heels release. Ropes of come dripping out as he pulls out slowly then inside again. You moaned at the sensation.
He didn’t move for a while—just stayed there, inside you, wrapped around you, like he couldn’t stand to lose the warmth.
“I’m not going anywhere,” you whispered, stroking his hair. “You don’t have to hold on so tight.”
He nuzzled into your shoulder. “I want to, though.”
“I know,” you smiled. “Me too.”
Eventually, he shifted, settling beside you, your bodies still tangled beneath the blankets.
The silence was heavy but comforting. No more fear. No more holding back.
Just breathing. Together.
You turned to look at him, and he was already watching you.
“What?” you asked, voice barely above a whisper.
He traced your jaw with his thumb, eyes soft.
“Out of everyone in this whole world… somehow, it was you.”
Your chest ached.
You kissed him, slow and deep and sure.
And thought, yeah.
Somehow, it was him too.
3K notes ¡ View notes
delulumel ¡ 2 months ago
Text
A REUNION TO REMEMBER
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PAIRING: sunghoon x fem!reader
GENRE/CW: smut, unprotected sex, fingering, cunnilingus, public sex, car sex, shower sex, squirting, lots of kissing, slight jealousy, slight degradation (slut) and praising, mentions of drinking, mentions of jay and karina (aespa), and other idols, mentions of nicknames (baby, princess, kitten), more to be added.
WORD COUNT: 15.3k words.
SYNOPSIS: You last met Park Sunghoon when you were attending high school, more precisely, when he had gained enough courage to ask you out, not knowing that the most popular girl of the school was already taken by the senior who was equally as popular. Four years later, your batch decided to hold a reunion back in your town, where you meet Sunghoon again. Only, the problem is that he's hotter than ever and you can't, for the life of you, keep your eyes off him.
PLAYLIST: here!
WARNING: 18+ content, minors dni.
A/N: hihi, angels! i’m done revamping the hoon fic, i hope y’all enjoy reading it <33 all likes, comments, reblogs are highly appreciated! it keeps me motivated! iloveyou all and happy reading <33
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“There’s absolutely no fucking way he didn’t know!” 
You exclaimed, frustration clear on your face, recalling how things went down back in tenth grade to prove your point. 
Karina only sighed on the other end of the call, “listen, babe, I love you but you have to take into account how oblivious the poor boy was back then! He studied and skated, that’s literally all he did, that was him,” she spoke, emphasizing on the but part.
You huffed, sitting down on the edge of your bed, nodding to yourself slowly as you let it sink that her point was actually a valid one for once. 
“It’s still awkward though,” you mumbled, playing with a loose thread of your sweater. 
“It’ll be fine, okay? It’s been four years, and it’s not like you have to talk to him.” Her words were true yet again, and this is why you loved her. 
Karina had been your best friend since you were in middle school, she’d always been honest and the social butterfly everyone loved, but at the same time, she was humble and kind, always taking care of the ones around her, not to mention how she was possibly the prettiest girl you’d ever met. 
You were relieved to know that she would be with you for the school reunion—an event which was planned thoroughly, it was a big deal. 
It wasn’t just a meet up, it was a three day trip back to your hometown, the whole itinerary was planned, as per the usual ritual:
The first day being the reunion dinner night—the most important one out of the three days, a day where everyone shows up clad in their best outfits, a day where they flaunt every bit of success and achievements they’ve accomplished. 
The second being the beach day, to make sure no one is left out on the fun factor, also 
The last being the night out at the newest club of your city, a night to let loose, especially when it concerns rekindling the old flames (happens more often than not).
The idea itself was thrilling, not to mention how desperately you needed this break, Karina was even quicker to express her excitement by booking two hotel rooms, non refundable at that, for you both as your parents now lived in Seoul, and not in your hometown. 
Another sigh left your mouth as you plopped down on your bed, staring at the ceiling while wondering why you even bothered to check the guest list, to check whether Park Sunghoon was invited or not. 
It was no surprise when you saw his name in the list, gulping as you recalled the embarrassing incident which took place between you both, the one in which you never got the opportunity to confront him, or explain yourself by any means. 
You closed your eyes, revisiting the ever so embarrassing memory. 
It was the last day of the tenth grade, your exams had just gotten over and the student crowd was elated, throwing notes everywhere to celebrate the fact that they were not chained to their textbooks anymore, not for a month at least; which caused you to scrunch your nose at the sight of paper wastage, not to mention, the meaningless litter all over. 
“Uh—Hey,” a sweet voice called your name at the exact second, succeeding in grabbing your attention. 
You recognized him as your classmate, Sunghoon, who was also a good friend of your own friend, Jay. 
“Hey! Hoon, right?” You smiled at him, a slight red colour spread on his cheeks at the sight of you. 
He nodded, also politely saying ‘hello’ to Karina, who was right next to you before his gaze fell to his fingers as he fiddled with them, his fang-like teeth biting down on his plush bottom lip with anxiety as he worked on mustering enough courage to look into your eyes, only to find your own ones staring at him with curiosity. 
“I just—I wanted to ask if you’d like to, you know, go out with me sometime?” He let out the question, unsure of what words he had used and cringing at how shaky his tone was. 
He had completely forgotten what he practiced in front of the mirror a thousand times, but he knows for sure that the result was not supposed to come out as horrendous as this one. 
Your eyes widened as you looked at Karina with pleading eyes, asking for help. It was no secret that you were one of the popular girls at your school; sweet, hardworking, and humble. 
Getting a confession such as this one was nothing new to you, declining politely always worked, however, that was when you were single and not in a relationship with the most popular guy in the school (as clichÊ as it was), who was also your senior. It was almost like a fanfiction with how the ace of the school, Lee Heeseung, had ended up falling for you. 
The news was quick to spread, fast enough for your group chat to go crazy, asking you questions so diabolical which almost made you throw your phone away with embarrassment. 
In the span of three days, the whole school was aware of the new ‘it couple’. Except for Sunghoon, that is.
“As, uh, friends?” You winced at how pathetic your question was, which certainly made things ten times more awkward than they were supposed to be.  
“N—no, as something more?” Sunghoon helpfully explained, looking everywhere but at your face now. 
“Sunghoon,” Karina spoke up, causing  you to release your breath, thankful that she was here to control the situation when you could say nothing and feel uncomfortable looking at his disappointed face.
“She’s taken, love! Sorry,” she informed him, his eyes widening and mouth agape. 
You wondered if he was genuinely clueless about this, he did look lost to you. 
You gasped, suddenly feeling an arm wrap around your waist, pulling you closer as you stared at Heeseung in surprise, who was already looking down at you with a smirk. 
“Hey, baby. I missed you,” he spoke up, kissing you right on the mouth, more exaggerated than usual. 
Sunghoon witnessed the whole scene, a frown settling on his face, embarrassment clear on his face which was now red and showed clear signs of sadness as he softly said, “e—excuse me,” leaving as soon the words left his mouth, shoulders slumped. 
You never met him again, only seeing him with Jay at times. 
He was quick to change his school soon after it, knowing that he’d be able to do so easily since the finals were over. 
You were going to meet him now. 
Your eyes snapped open at the thought of that, you just wished for the trip to be a pleasant one. Furthermore, from your side, you’d make sure to not be awkward around him, pretending as if the whole situation didn’t happen in the first place.
 If you’d even get to talk to him, that is. 
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“Wow, you really are dumb,” Jake laughed uncontrollably once Jay finished telling him the story of none other than Park Sunghoon. 
“Shut up,” Hoon mumbled, annoyed that the topic which he had wanted so desperately to be buried in the corner of his heart forever was brought up, once again. 
“Wait, but if you knew about them dating then why didn’t you tell Hoon?” Jake pointed the question towards Jay. 
“Because he never told me he was going to confess in the first place!” Jay’s eyes widened almost comically as he exclaimed, “and it was exam time, finals at that, Sunghoon had sworn he wouldn’t use his phone till the exams ended, and you probably don’t have any clue as to how big of a nerd he was—” 
“Jay! Fucking stop this,” Hoon whined, covering his face with his palm as Jay took out his phone, scrolling to find a picture of Sunghoon. 
He looked a lot smaller than he is now, wearing a yellow, collared t-shirt and round specs, lips curved into a small smile as he looked into the camera. 
“Holy fuck! You could have been easily casted for the live action of Doraemon, as Nobita, of course.” Jake high-fived Jay after taking a look at the picture, the latter almost falling down with the laugh he had let out, the similarities were uncanny. 
“The fuck—Nobita? Oh god this is so fucking annoying, can you guys shut up now? I don’t even want to go and face her ever again,” he snapped, whining like a kid right after. 
He had been overthinking about everything that could happen once you meet him again, his brain running at the speed of light with the unless possibilities. 
Would you laugh in his face and remind him of how stupid he looked asking someone like you out?
Heck, would you even remember him? 
You honestly didn’t have any reason to.
Acting nonchalant didn’t help his case one bit, his self awareness higher than ever, especially when it concerned you. 
It mattered to him a lot more than he’d like to admit, your opinion mattered more than he’d like to admit, even after all this while. 
A four year gap should have been enough to let his embarrassment fade away, however, all his efforts went to vain once he got invited to the reunion.
“Listen, it’ll be okay. She probably doesn’t even remember you!” Jay tried to make him feel better. 
“That’s very consoling, that totally calms me down, thank you very much,” Hoon rolled his eyes, wondering if you’d forgotten him already. It wasn’t as if you both had been close, but you did see each around and during the classes. 
He can’t lie, the thought made him sad. 
“You definitely have a chance now though, if that makes you feel any better,” Jake let out slowly, noticing the glow up Sunghoon had after comparing him with his old picture. 
“Shut up, It doesn’t matter, I don’t even like her anymore,” he mumbled, a light blush creeping up his neck as he did so. 
Jake and Jay exchanged a knowing look, putting on a smile as they dragged Sunghoon for shopping while Jay went on talking about what all they should be packing for the three day trip, bringing a genuine smile to Hoon’s face as he looked at his goofy best friends. 
Maybe the trip wouldn’t be so bad, he thought. 
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“Ay babe! You look hot,” Karina winked at you, eyeing you up and down while you glided your lipstick along the expanse of your lips, smacking them together a few times to spread it evenly. 
You winked back, “you look hotter.” She laughed just as you said that, engulfing you in a hug. 
“Ready to leave?” She asked, getting her luggage out as you followed with a nod, smiling while you got into the cab, Karina being quick to snap a few selfies to mark the start of your trip. 
The entire time on your way to your destination, you felt giddy, wondering how everyone looked now, how their life must have changed, did they even remember you, would they even recognize you? 
It had been a while since you had last met them and you secretly hoped that you’d get a chance to get laid—your frustrated mind needed this, the studies kept you busy and you hadn’t got time to tend to your personal needs. 
Your mind was full of scenarios as you imagined how your stay would go, what all activities you’d do and so on, falling asleep on the plane while envisioning the same. 
“Wake up, sleepy head,” Karina shook your arm slightly, waking you up from your dreamland. 
It took you a second to realize that the plane was going to land, followed by the announcement of the same and you were still sleepy when you put on your belt, eyes barely open as you wiped your lips with the back of your hand. 
The journey was short, and you were checked into your hotel room in no time. As soon as you jumped on the bed, Karina came into your room holding a bunch of skincare products and sheet masks. 
“Get up! We need that glow for tonight,” she demanded, plopping on the bed with you as she ushered you to go and wash your face while you mumbled complaints with the need to sleep more. 
Skincare was therapeutic for you, however, it also made you sleepy, even more so when the hotel beds were the absolute definition of comfort and pleasure, helping you slip into dreamland in no time. 
Your skin felt radiant, so lovingly soft by the time you woke up, also checking the time so see that you had to start getting ready for the reunion dinner at once for you to reach there in time. 
“No! You’re not wearing that,” Karina pointed at your trouser outfit, a pathetic scowl on her face, looking at the clothes in disapproval. 
“Why not?” You asked, looking at it with genuine confusion. It did seem like a decent outfit to you. 
“Because we have to show everyone that you’re still the it girl you were four years back, now hotter than ever,” she mumbled, looking into your luggage as you let her take the matter into her hands, your focus now on styling your hair. 
“This!” She exclaimed, getting a dress out which made your eyes sparkle. It was a new dress which you hadn’t gotten a chance to wear before, and she was right, it’s the perfect opportunity for you all to dress up a little. 
“Huh? I don’t remember keeping this in my bag,” you looked at her. 
“Well obviously, I did,” she flipped her hair, proud of herself. 
That was it, the music was blasting, the room was a mess with the makeup sprawled all around, also little articles of clothing as you both dolled yourself up. 
“Ready?” She smiled. She looked stunning  in that black dress of hers, her freshly coloured hair only added to her beauty. 
“Ready,” you confirmed. 
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“Y/n!” You heard your name, and suddenly you felt warm hands around your body, pulling you into a friendly hug. 
Sweet voice and strawberry scent was enough for you to know it was Isa. A big smile spread on your face as you hugged her tighter, looking around to see all of your classmates hugging and talking to each other. 
“You look so pretty!” You were in awe, seeing her gummy smile and the pink dress she sported, she was no less than a princess. 
“Girl look at you? You’re glowing! You literally grow prettier each day,” she giggled, making your heart melt. She had always been kind and bubbly, another one of the reasons why you were so close to her. 
You looked around the restaurant, it was new and the interior was modern, booked for the night for your batchmates. Meeting everyone was like a breath of fresh air. 
You didn’t even manage to say hello to everyone before they announced the start of the dinner, asking everyone to take seats, however, one of your old friends Jay was quick to reach to you, his smile as sharp as you remembered it to be. 
“As stunning as ever,” he complimented you, hugging your side. 
He stood tall in front of you, sporting a scent that gave you the essence of richness which only complemented his black suit, worn with a white button up inside, a gold chain dangling down his slender neck, resting well on his clavicle. 
You can’t deny, he looked handsome. 
“Thank you,” you said softly, “you look chic as always too.”
A sly smile graced his face, “do I now?” He chuckled, “come on, let’s go and sit,” he said. 
You nodded, following him as you noticed that almost everyone had taken seats, Karina waving at you, pointing at the seat she saved, which you gladly took, fixing your dress while you did so as you started rambling about everyone you met till now. 
What you had failed to notice, however, was the person sitting right next to you—someone who had visibly stiffened with your sudden appearance. He didn’t move an inch, not until you finally turned your head to look his way. 
Your breath hitched, and you prayed that it wasn’t visible how your eyes widened by just a fraction, your mouth stayed agape, and your body frozen, all at the mere sight of Park Sunghoon. 
Glow up would be an understatement, he looked like a completely different person without his specs and baby fat resting on his cheek. 
His eyes were the perfect shade of chestnut brown colour, it was the first time you had looked into them so clearly, face sculpted with a sharp jawline and pointed nose, lips naturally shaded into a glossy reddish hue, his fangs peeking out by a midge, and hair parted to the side, styled accordingly to match his black button up. 
“Hey,” a deep voice snapped you out of your observation session and you realized that it was him. 
“Sunghoon, hey. It’s been a while,” you smiled at him softly, hoping that he didn’t notice you staring at him just a second back, mentally slapping yourself for reacting that way. 
Meanwhile the boy was surprised to learn that you indeed did remember him, his heart beating a little faster now that he was in such a close proximity with you. 
It was something he had ran through his mind a few times—the possibility of you both running into each other, the possibility that you’d care to remember him, the possibility that you would talk to him, however, now that it was actually happening, he couldn’t help but admire your beauty, absolutely no coherent thought graced his mind. 
“You look so beautiful,” he whispered mindlessly, mouth opening again as he realized what he had said out loud, “uh—how have you been?” He quickly asked, mentally slapping himself for being such a mess. 
That only made you smile further, a glint in your eyes as you replied, “thank you, Hoon. You look really handsome too.” You let out almost in a whispered breath, and you did mean it. 
Your words made him smile, which displayed his fangs. Everything about him intrigued you all of a sudden, his presence affecting you in a way you didn’t think it would, your curiosity higher than ever. 
Before you could talk more, the servers came out, bringing the starters as everyone chatted excitedly at your table, Karina pulling you to her side rather abruptly as you yelped while she whispered in your ear. 
“Is that him? Fucking hell, Y/n, you couldn’t say yes then but it’s not too late—just four years, do it now!” She rushed to speak into your ear, making sure no one else heard it but you. 
“Karina shut up, I just met him,” you whispered urgently with wide eyes to warn her.
“So? You have three whole days to be with him! And to be honest, he looks like he knows how to give a girl a real good fuck—” you covered her mouth, not letting her finish the sentence. 
“Oh lord! I’m not going to do that!” You exclaimed, taking a bite of your soup, mood uplifting at the scrumptious taste. 
“But why?” She was almost going to whine before Sunghoon called out your name, saving you from this conversation. 
The sound of him pronouncing your name was rather attractive, especially the way he enunciated it so perfectly, your face heating up with the sudden conversation. 
“Yes?” You asked too quickly. 
He chuckled softly and you swore your name had never sounded any better. 
Maybe you were too into studying all this while that even the littlest things made you jumpy. 
Or maybe it was the hottest looking man sitting right next to you. 
“Could you pass me that napkin, please?” He asked politely. 
You were quick to grab one for him as you nodded, not trusting your voice any further, his slender fingers brushed against yours as he took the napkin from you, saying thank you softly, the slight touch of his cold hands made you shiver. 
You needed a distraction before you’d make fun of yourself, and soon, you found one.
Yeonjun, who sat right in front of you, was successful in distracting you, asking about your life in Seoul and about what you’ve been studying.
He was also a student like you, although he liked to work as a model in his free time, “it pays well and you get free clothes too!” He explained with a goofy smile. 
You felt content, loving how friendly the atmosphere was as if you guys never lost touch in the first place, everyone drinking champagne to celebrate with a cheer that you join in too, maybe this is why people hype up reunions. 
Sunghoon was attentive to everything you had said till now, not wanting to eavesdrop yet way too curious to learn more about you, trying his best not to stare at you every few minutes. Your smile made his lips curve into one as well, unconsciously at that. 
The dinner concluded soon, everyone getting up and gathering for a round of group pictures. 
Sunghoon’s hand brushed against yours in the process, succeeding in giving you goosebumps again, which he didn’t fail to observe this time. 
“Are you cold?” He asked, noticing your goosebumps. 
You didn’t have any better explanation, and you couldn’t possibly tell him that he was one responsible for it. 
“Oh—yeah, a bit,” you answered, looking at the height difference between you both, his body looked buff underneath his shirt, his veins visible now that he had rolled his sleeves up. 
“Here,” he offered his blazer to you, gently wrapping it around your frame as you could feel yourself being overdosed with his scent—it was attractive, engulfing you as a whole. 
“I—thank you.” Your cheeks felt hot as you looked away, trying to control your breathing. 
Sunghoon was clearly pleased to see you in his clothes, he had seen you after a solid four years and yet, his opinion about you didn’t change in the slightest, you looked perfect to him. 
You both reached the group, you trying to tiptoe more as to ensure your visibility in the picture. It was hard to fit such a big group into a frame, especially when people simply couldn’t stand straight out of pure excitement, posing with silly expressions. 
“Y/n! Come here,” Karina called your name, pulling you close for another set of pictures with everyone. 
“Listen guys! Tomorrow we’ll meet at the beach by twelve, make sure you reach there on time!” Hyunjin announced. 
You loved beaches, the sunlight made the water shine like it hid the prettiest set of diamonds in there, the smell of land and water meeting was soothing to your senses, a place so calming, you could spend hours there just staring at the beauty of nature, just to see the sky switching it’s colours from hues of blue to deepest of the orange to the darkest shade of black. 
It all made beaches beautiful and you were excited about tomorrow already. 
As you made your way out of the restaurant, you noticed two other people waiting for you along with your best friend, Jay and Sunghoon. 
“You’re here! We’re taking a cab together to our hotel, apparently they’re staying over at the same place as ours,” she explained, “they probably have their rooms in front of ours too!” She joked. 
Sunghoon looked at you in his blazer, deciding that he won’t even ask you to give it back to him, it suited you too much. 
His clothes suited you way too much. 
He wanted to spend more time with you, he wanted to sit next to you in the cab and he made sure to sit in between you and Jay, his side pressed against yours. 
“Are you comfortable?” He asked softly. 
“Oh, yeah. Are you?” 
He nodded, loving the arrangement so far. Living in the same hotel meant that he’d get to see more of you while Jay sniggered, causing Sunghoon to elbow him as he let out an ‘ouch’. Opening his mouth to ask you questions now. 
“So, Y/n, how’s it going with uni? Do you have a boyfriend or someone special in your life?” Jay asked, knowing that his friend was dying to know the same. 
“It’s honestly so hectic but somehow still manageable, I like what I’m doing and I won’t be leaving without that degree so, yes I feel like the hard work would pay in the end,” you explained confidently, “and no, I sadly do not have a boyfriend. It’s honestly hard to go on dates when you barely have time for yourself.”
Sadly you had said yet Sunghoon couldn’t have been happier with your answer. 
You’d always been hard working and Sunghoon admires that about you, his focus was solely on you ever since you stepped inside the restaurant and talked to him. It wasn’t easy for Sunghoon to fall for someone, but once he saw you again, it was as if his feelings for you had never left. 
Just then, the car swiftly came to a stop, jerking forward slightly as Sunghoon quickly put his arm around your waist, pulling your body into him, securing it. 
Some car had successfully jumped the red light, almost causing an accident, but thankfully you guys were all safe and without any scratch as the driver was quick to use the brakes, before driving again, making sure everything goes smoothly now. 
“You okay?” He asked, whispering as he cupped your cheeks. 
You nodded, unconsciously shifting closer to him and he didn’t make any efforts to move his hand away, letting it rest on your waist while your head rested against his shoulder. You were hyper aware of the proximity but the scare was enough for you to not pay attention to it. 
It felt comfortable, his scent, his touch, but more than that, it felt genuine, which is why you closed your eyes, sleeping on his shoulder while his breathing hitched, looking at your sleeping figure. 
So pretty, he thought, brushing a few strands of your hair away from your face, tucking them behind your ear, letting his fingers linger there for a while. It felt like a dream to Sunghoon, and he wished that he could get more of this — more of you. 
The comfort and your warmth seemingly got to him as well, his head resting on yours as he drifted off to dreamland with a slight smile ghosting on his lips. 
“Cute! So fucking cute what the fuck?” 
“They look like a couple, woah.” 
A series of flashes was quick to disturb your sleep, eyelids slowly opening to see two phones being shoved into your face, clicking pictures of you, the chatter coming from the very same pair of people. 
Just then, you realized that the picture in question was not just of you, but of the guy who so gladly let you sleep on his shoulder. 
Your eyes widened when he blinked open his eyes too, Karina and Jay laughing at his reaction when he saw you staring at him, face inches away from yours. 
His eyes widened comically before he diverted his attention to Jay, slapping his hand away who was busy shooting all of this on his phone, even the cab driver watched it with a fond smile on his face. 
“You guys are adorable,” Karina squealed when you got out of the cab, rushing to get back to your room, cheeks heated and heart racing. 
Were you embarrassed? Yes. But not even a single cell in your body can deny that it felt good—being close to someone. 
“Can you stop pairing us as if we’re school kids?” You deadpanned, rolling your eyes at her excitement. 
“Absolutely not, it’s fun.” She shrugged, joining you in the lift, “oh, and by the way, nice blazer you’ve got on,” she smiled, continuing to tease you. 
Right, you had to return the blazer to Hoon. 
Turns out, Karina was borderline prophetic and both of them were indeed on the same floor as you, your room right in front of Sunghoon’s room as if universe was hinting at something. 
“Good night guys,” she sang, leaving for her room, a smirk on her face as she subtly pointed at Sunghoon’s room. 
Jay followed suit, leaving for his own room, not forgetting to send a wink your way, which the other boy noticed with a frown on his face. 
Your outstretched hand got his attention, his blazer now in your hand, “thank you so much for giving me your blazer, Hoon,” you spoke up.
His nickname comes out of your mouth seamlessly, making him smile. 
“You can keep it with yourself,” he started, causing you to tilt your head in a questioning manner, “in case you feel cold again, y’know?”
“Yeah? What if I want you to be the one who keeps me warm if I feel cold tomorrow?” You looked into his eyes, testing the waters to ensure if he was actually confident enough to handle you now. 
“I—Yes I can keep you warm,” he stuttered. 
“Y’know we won’t be needing the blazer then,” he answered a second after overcoming the initial shock of you saying that, stepping closer to you. 
“Perfect. Good night then, Hoon,” you spoke sweetly, a playful smirk on your face, your own heart racing at the exchange. 
However, he wrapped his fingers around your wrist the second you turned around, spinning you so you stood right in front of him, hands on his chest to support yourself as your eyes widened at his bold move. 
“Good night, love,” he whispered, his finger tracing your jaw, before he leaned in to place a soft kiss on the apple of your cheek, a teasing smile on his face before he walked two steps back, his bottom lip bitten to conceal his smirk as he got into his room.
Your fingers instantly touched the place where he had kissed you. The small display of affection earlier had left you restless and desperate for more, wondering how his lips would feel against the expanse of your skin. 
“God, Sunghoon,” you whispered to yourself, eyes closing as you realized;
You wanted more. 
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“Fuck—oh lord! Faster, please,” you whined, as his fingers pressed against your cunt, rubbing your soft folds in an agonizingly slow pace, his lips planting hot open-mouthed kisses down the valley of your chest. 
“You like that, huh?” He asked, mumbling against your skin, biting and sucking on your hardened nipples harshly, doing it enough to imprint marks on your body. 
The pain was more pleasurable than you could have ever thought of. 
“So fucking much,” you hummed, fingers grabbing onto his roots, tugging his hair slightly. 
You cried out of pleasure when he inserted two of his fingers into your pussy, pumping them in and out before he came to whisper against your lips. 
“Bet you’ve been dreaming about this—about me,” he smirked. 
A moan left your mouth, which he swallowed by kissing you right away, taking all your lewd noises in. 
“Don’t you, kitten?” He asked against your mouth, his fingers leading you to your orgasm, the nickname only acting as a catalyst to the high of your pleasure. 
All until your alarm rang and your eyes snapped open, a gasp leaving your mouth as you sat up straight in a go, once you came to the realization that it was just a dream. 
A wet dream. 
About Park Sunghoon. 
“Oh god, oh my fucking god, no way,” you groaned, hiding your face into the blanket, pussy tingling with the dream you had a few seconds back, mostly due to how realistic it was. 
You had no other option but to hop into the shower and lean against the shower wall, your fingers inching down to play with your soaked folds, rubbing your clit in gentle circles as your phone played a sensual song from your playlist, remembering how Hoon touched you in your dream. 
You moaned, shoving two fingers in, curling them inside you with a desperate moan, a moan of Sunghoon’s name, as you bit your lip to conceal your lewd noises, you thrusted your digits with need, till you made a mess on your fingers, breathing hard as you struggled to stand straight. 
You looked into the mirror, breathless, realizing just how pathetic your condition was, even more so when you had made yourself cum by thinking of Park Sunghoon. 
You wondered how you were ever going to face him after this. 
Especially when you had a beach day ahead and the possibility of seeing Hoon shirtless would be high. 
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Ignoring the fact that you had a wet dream about the man sitting in front of you during breakfast was a tough thing to do, yet you managed it well. 
He looked like a prince even in casual clothes and he knew how to make you go crazy by just a wink of his, even giving you the doughnut in his plate, which you wanted so dearly. 
His appearance was innocent, unlike last night where he was in a black button up—hot and attractive beyond words, he left you speechless. 
“Are we renting a bike or not?” You asked Karina with a smirk after you were done eating. 
“I’m down,” she gave you a high-five, “I don’t know about the boys though.”
“Wait, you can ride bikes?” Jay asked, impressed. 
“Of course, we can, Jay,” You answered proudly. 
“Take us on rides then,” he said, brow raised at the offer. 
“Sure, select your rider, we’ll go to the beach on the bike then,” you smiled.
By the time you got ready in shorts and a top, which you wore on your bikini set, the sun had come up and was shining brightly. You had your bag packed with all essentials and two sets of extra clothes because you never know when you’re at the beach, not to mention how much sunscreen you had used to protect your skin. 
All four of you got into the lift, and you noticed how you and Karina were wearing the same colours, while the boys were in shorts and t-shirts. 
“Who’s coming with me then?” She asked, showing her bike keys. 
“I am,” Jay spoke up, as if it was their plan to leave you with Sunghoon, alone at that. 
You bit your lip, closing your eyes for a second before turning to look at Hoon, “you’re stuck with me then.”
“Perfect,” he smirked, following you out. 
“Wear this,” you passed him the helmet, which he put on. 
But your gaze went on his arm, which flexed as he fixed his helmet, the short sleeved t-shirt did nothing to hide his muscles. 
You were surely not gonna survive this day. 
“Let’s go,” he smiled, snapping you out of your daydream. 
“You ready?” A smirk settled on your face as you checked the rear view mirror, looking at Sunghoon, who was quick to send a nod back. 
What he didn’t expect was that you’d speed up the second you start the bike, making him jerk forward and hold on to your waist, making you shiver slightly before you began your journey of a total of ten minutes, the beach being close to your hotel. 
“Woah, fuck!” You heard the boy say from behind, making you smile as you zoomed past the cars and other vehicles. 
“Hold on tight,” you screamed against the wind, loving the light breeze caressing your skin, and Sunghoon’s body pressed against yours. 
His arms tightened around you with your command, and your mind wandered to the morning when you dreamt about him. 
It did feel good, and you were certain you wanted more. 
Meanwhile, Sunghoon was looking around, enjoying the scenery, but most importantly, he was enjoying the time he got to spend with you — his old crush. He leaned in, taking in your scent, smiling at how you didn’t change your perfume still. 
He was highly attentive and observant when it came to you. 
A series of hooting was heard in the parking lot, where all of your gang was waiting for you four to arrive, thoroughly surprised to see you riding bikes. 
“That’s so fucking hot,” Yeonjun came over, wearing only beach shorts, abs on display as he saw you take off your helmet, the scene looked as if it came out of a movie. 
“Dang, Junnie, been working out?” you asked, focus now on him as you happily chatted and took his hand, which he offered with his charming smile, and walked towards the beach with everyone else. 
Sunghoon watched it all with his jaw clenched, Jay and Karina approaching him with a knowing expression on their faces. He wanted to spend time with you, and he didn’t expect anyone to steal you away from him so soon. 
He was pissed. 
“Maybe she’d notice you if you remove your SpongeBob t-shirt,” Jay adviced, keeping his elbow on his shoulder. 
“What’s wrong with SpongeBob?” He asked, tilting his head. 
“Oh god, what would you do without Jay, he’s right by the way. Also, do you have abs?” Karina asked, doing the same from his other side. 
“Uh huh—does it matter?” Hoon huffed, shrugging their hands off and walking further. 
“It does matter when you’re whipped and trying to impress a baddie!” Jay announced helpfully, making Hoon stop to slap his shoulder. 
“Stop shouting for fucks sake!” He warned. 
“You’ll never get her at this rate. Trust me, go shirtless and see the magic. Also, stop being a loser and move your ass, go and approach her before someone else does,” Jay said. 
Sunghoon simply looked around to ensure that no one was eavesdropping on their conversation, his friend embarrassed him enough and your best friend didn’t help either. Did he actually make it that obvious? He wondered. 
Seeing you laughing with Yeonjun did make him want to step up his game. 
“Guys! Get changed and then the ones who wanna enjoy the water are free to do that, while those who wish to do water sports, gather around that area,” Taehyun announced, pointing at a shed area meant for the registration of water sports. 
You simply wanted to enjoy in the water, so you made your way towards the changing stalls, getting rid of your shorts and top to reveal your bikini, after which, you looked into the mirror to ensure your appearance was okay. 
“Love the bikini,” Isa complimented and you cooed at her one piece swimsuit. Everything she wore suited her perfectly. 
And Isa didn’t lie, a lot of heads turned to look at you once you were out, some silently admiring your beauty, for instance—Sunghoon, with his eyes fixated on you and your body. 
While others, like Yeonjun, didn’t hesitate to show how pleased they were by your entrance, whistling slowly, which flustered you slightly as you rolled your eyes at him, rushing to get under the beach umbrella, eyes darting away to look at Sunghoon, who was already staring at you. 
“See you in the water,” Karina left, running away with excitement clear on her face. 
That left you two alone under the umbrella. 
“You’re not going?” You asked Sunghoon, getting sunscreen out of your bag. 
“Just waiting for you,” he spoke smoothly, causing you to look at him. 
“Help me then?” You passed him the bottle of sunscreen, turning around with your bottom lip bitten. 
Sunghoon took a deep breath, he wanted to touch you in more ways than one. He squeezed out some sunscreen, his cold fingers touching your skin as he applied it on your shoulder with a gentle massage. 
His strong hands made you sigh with pleasure, head tilting to give him more access to your neck area, his fingers paying attention to each inch of your back, fingers digging into your inner shoulder with his breath fanning your neck. 
He took your name, almost as a whisper. 
“Yes, Hoon?” You looked back at him, only to find his face inches away from you. 
He came closer, looking into your eyes, “let’s go,” he smiled, heart racing from the proximity and he wasn’t sure how longer he could handle staying so close to you without even kissing you. 
“Race you to the water,” you screamed, running away with a smile so big, it naturally made the boy smile as he realized how much he wanted you. 
You were fast, but he was faster and his arms wrapped around your waist the second your feet touched the water. Soft giggles left your mouth as he turned you around and ran further, standing in the water with his arms open and a victorious smile graced his face. 
“That’s fucking cheating!” You pointed your finger at him, others laughing at your childish bickering as he defended himself with a serious expression, trying not to give in to your pout. 
“I don’t cheat,” he came close to say, pouting on his own. 
Before you could retort, he started splashing water all over your body, others joining soon and splashing water everywhere. 
“Hoon, what the—” You squealed, rushing to splash water back on him, only to trip and fall right into his arms, his hands firmly holding you close to him. 
“What? Falling for me already?” He asked, a cocky smirk on his face. 
“In your dreams,” you retorted. 
“You were,” he shrugged, confusing you yet again. 
“Where?” 
He hooked his finger and lifted your chin tenderly, making you look into his eyes, “in my dream, last night,” he whispered, leaning in closer, leaving you speechless. 
Sunghoon was the shy, nerdy kid who used to sit in the front of the class, always keeping to himself, talking to only Jay. 
Now, however, you couldn’t even recognize the guy in front of you. While you found the old Hoon to be cute, you wouldn’t lie when you say that the confidence he oozed now made you want to know him more. The words rolled off his tongue so smoothly, which made you wonder if he flirted with others too. 
It seemed as if he was on a roll to make you go speechless, and his plan was working. By the time you turned around to reply to him, you saw him swiftly remove his t-shirt. 
Your body stilled as your eyes traveled up and down his body, skin shining with the sunlight that complimented him perfectly. He was lean but muscular, muscles flexing as he took off his SpongeBob t-shirt, abs now on display for everyone to see. He looked flawless. 
Karina elbowed your side, eliciting a yelp out of you, “ow fuck—what?” You whisper yelled. 
“You’re drooling,” she pointed out, “get that man,” she tapped on your shoulder, pushing you towards him. 
However, when you observed some girl, who wasn’t a part of your group, coming close to Hoon while placing her hand on his bicep and asking if he was single, it made you want to run away and not witness the exchange of Sunghoon smirking at the other girl. 
Jealousy was a nasty disease, and sadly you were terminal. 
Naturally, you made your way out of the water, face hot as you fanned yourself walking towards the beach chairs under the umbrella, not knowing that the boy had no other job but to follow you, politely rejecting the other girl. 
You sat down, closing your eyes as you tried your hardest not to think about the dream you had earlier, your desire only fuelled when he flirted with you with that ever so stunning smirk of his. 
Seeing him shirtless was your last straw.
You needed alcohol in your system to survive this, to let yourself free. Sunghoon was already resting on the chair next to you by the time you opened your eyes again. 
“I’m hurt,” he started, looking your way. 
You raised your brows at his comment, “why? I thought you had company.” You took a sip of your drink, enjoying the bitter taste on your tongue and the slight warmth it brought to your throat. 
The statement was of immense pleasure to him, especially when he sensed the hint of (read: obvious) jealousy that your words radiated, and he just wished he wasn’t being delusional, his ego boosting alongside his confidence. 
Everyone was out of the water by now, the gang was done with their water sports activities as well, coming and sharing their experiences with a loud chatter, also talking about arranging a bonfire as the sky turned into the prettiest shades of yellow with orange and red hues. 
“I do have company,” he whispered, coming closer for you to hear, “a very pretty one at that.”
He took the beer bottle from your hand, taking a long sip of it, your eyes fixated on how his Adam's apple bobbed as he gulped it down. 
You snatched your bottle from him, watching as two drops trailed down his chest and towards his abs. 
“Sorry, but you left your pretty company back in the water,” you huffed, smiling sarcastically before leaving to get a shower and change back into your shorts before the bonfire. 
Sunghoon held on to your wrist before you could escape, pulling you so your back was flesh against his chest, his lips on your ear, brushing it slightly, “you sound jealous, princess,” he teased. 
You turned to look at him, lips an inch away from his, your head tilting, “I don’t have a single reason to be jealous, Sunghoon,” you quipped. 
With that, you walked away, knowing well you were jealous when you had no right to be so. 
Sunghoon, on the other hand, was having the time of his life stealing your attention and having you to himself. Your reactions only encouraged him to do more, he wasn’t the one to flirt, however, he loved to get a reaction out of you. 
Being together for two days was enough for Sunghoon to realize that his feelings for you never faded, it only grew more after spending more time with you. He couldn’t hide the smile forming on his face as you denied being jealous, it gave him hope that maybe, just maybe, he’d have a chance to win your heart. The fragrance of your body mist lingered around him because of the earlier proximity. 
He swore it was his new favourite scent. 
His eyes followed you, admiring your beauty from afar before he too went to get a shower and freshen up. 
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“So, you and Sunghoon, huh?” Yeonjun asked, sitting down on the sand next to you. 
The shower did make you feel better, the cool breeze and the sunset creating a calming atmosphere, the bonfire in front of you only making it cozier. 
The question caught you off guard, resulting in an awkward cough from you, “what do you mean?” 
“Come on, anyone can notice the sexual tension between you two, or maybe I’m just observant,” he shrugged, “you can’t deny that he’s hot,” he pointed out helpfully. 
“I’m not denying anything, but I don’t think anything will happen between us,” you pouted, watching the man walk towards your group, drying his hair with a towel. 
A gesture so natural, but he made it seem so enthralling that you couldn’t help but stare. 
“So you do think he’s hot,” Yeonjun followed your gaze with a smirk. 
He wasn’t going to let this go, and you were sure of that, a groan leaving your mouth as you divert your attention towards him. 
“I’ll help you get his attention, although I think you’re doing pretty fine yourself,” he lowered his voice at the last few words as Sunghoon sat down next to you, passing you his charming smile. 
“Truth or dare,” Yeonjun asked you, starting to implement his plan, passing you another can of beer. 
Sunghoon looked at you with curiosity filled eyes, jaw clenched slightly as he noticed your closeness with Yeonjun, why is he always around you? 
“Uh—truth?” You asked more than answering. 
This also gained the attention of your group, everyone cheering to play a round of truth and dare just like the old times. 
“That’s boring,” he scrunched his nose, “how about I dare you to kiss or rather, makeout with someone in this circle?” 
“Yeah, absolutely not. I’m not playing,” you took a long sip of your beer, ignoring the series of disappointed grunts coming your way. 
“Why?” He whined, “I bet anyone would want a kiss from you,” he emphasized, looking around the circle dramatically before he swiped his tongue on his bottom lip. 
Sunghoon bit the inside of his cheek in annoyance, eyes never leaving your face as he saw you disagree, a small smile on his face at your rejection. 
Oh boy, was he going crazy with his ever so often mood swings, only when it involved you. 
He also wondered if Yeonjun wanted that kiss for himself. 
“He’s right I mean, you are beautiful and oh god, I remember the number of proposals you used to get on Valentine’s day,” someone pointed out as a matter of fact. 
Seems like everyone was drunk already and the night had just started. 
That statement made Hoon go stiff as he remembered his own memory of confessing to you. 
“Oh, that reminds me of the time Sunghoon had come to ask you out,” Yunjin mentioned with a mischievous smile, as if everyone was on a mission to have you and Sunghoon in the spotlight. 
You closed your eyes, dreading the topic that was about to come up right in front of everyone, moreover, deep down you did wish to hear what Hoon had to say, after all these years.
The said guy groaned, hiding his face when the topic he so desperately wanted to avoid, came up out of nowhere, secretly hoping that you didn’t find him weird after remembering the same. 
“Sunghoon confessed?” 
“What? When did this happen?”
“Did you reject him?” 
A bunch of questions were thrown your way and you looked at Hoon with a panicked face, him doing the same, biting his cheek yet again and looking away in, well, rejection. 
“It was in high school, and that’s all we’re telling you,” you answered, dismissing the crowd. 
“So you can kiss him as your dare,” someone proudly suggested. 
He looked bothered and you frowned, “guys, no. Let’s not make him uncomfortable now, it should be consensual y’know,” you spoke gently and Yeonjun took the hint to change the conversation really quick, daring someone else to drink five shots in a go. 
If only you knew how much he yearned for it, yet he was sensible enough to not let it happen in front of an audience; batshit drunk and immature audience if he must say so. 
“Hey. Are you alright?” You kept your hand on his surprisingly warm ones. 
“You’re cold,” he frowned, intertwining his fingers with yours effortlessly and keeping them inside his jacket’s pocket, “I have to keep you warm, remember?” He said, still looking elsewhere as to hide the evident blush creeping up his face, not sure if it was due to the prior embarrassment or the newfound warmth of your body. 
He was nervous, trying his best to divert the topic and you let him, scooting closer to feel his warmth. 
“I really did not know you had a boyfriend back then,” he confessed with reddened cheeks, “I was just so fucking busy with exams and—”
“You don’t have to say anything, Hoon. I do understand and I’m sorry for what happened that day,” you tilted your head to look at him, blinking slowly as you finally felt your alcohol kicking in, “you’re pretty,” you whispered.
Maybe you shouldn’t have drank that much, knowing well you can’t handle, or anyone can handle you after you reach that level of drunk. 
Hoon was on his fourth can of beer already, his tolerance level not being too high, causing him to get drunk faster—it showed on his face. 
His heart hammered against his ribs when you whispered that to him, and he pulled you closer, “you’re the prettiest,” he mumbled, tucking a stray lock of your hair behind your ear. 
Everyone seemed to be in their own worlds, laughing at random things, playing music and dancing, however, your drunk self wanted nothing more than to be with Sunghoon, to kiss him, and it took all of your self control to restrain yourself from doing so. 
Sunghoon pulled you closer and on his lap, your face buried in his chest and his arms wrapped around you. He wanted you more than ever and being drunk, he couldn’t help but pull you impossibly closer to him. 
His palm rested on the side of your waist, gentle caresses sending jolts of pleasure up your spine. It felt too 
Despite everything, you did admit how his presence made you feel warm inside, and it wasn’t solely because of alcohol. 
He bummed a song under his breath, you almost slept in his hold, his deep voice giving you butterflies. His embrace made you feel wanted, just like you had wanted him, and you indeed were in your own world, soon being disturbed by others saying it’s time to go back. 
Someone made you drink water, and soon, you were in a cab with your best friend next to you, Sunghoon on the other side and Jay riding shotgun. 
“Good night,” Karina sang out once you reached your hotel, Jay leaving soon after. 
“Come with me, I want to sleep with you,” you whined, no control over your mouth anymore, you took Sunghoon’s hand, pulling him into your room. 
“Y/n,” he whispered, closing the door behind him. 
“Fuck,” he muttered out, seeing you remove your denim shorts, leaving you in your t-shirt as you climbed on your bed. 
He followed, discarding his clothes and getting into the bed with you, a blanket covering your bodies. Your back was pressed against his muscular chest, his arm around your waist keeping you in place. 
A soft gasp left your mouth as you felt his hot breath on your shoulder, his lips touching your skin, making it burn with warmth, “Hoon,” you softly whined. 
“Yes, baby?” He continued placing open mouthed kisses on your skin. 
“Kiss me,” you breathed out. 
“Would you like that?”
“Yes, so much,” you confirmed. 
“I want to kiss you,” he confessed, “but not when we’re drunk. If you ask that of me tomorrow then I’ll do it without question.”
“No—right now,” you mumbled, whining. 
“Shh, sleep for me baby,” he said, distracting you with soft kisses on your shoulder again. 
“But—”
“Go on, princess, sleep, hm?” 
You smiled even though he couldn’t see you, “okay,” you said softly, admiring how beautiful the man was. 
You turned around to face him, “good night, Hoon,” your voice came out as a whisper. 
“Good night , princess.” You felt his lips on your forehead before you drifted off to dreamland. 
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A dull ache in your head disturbed your precious sleep. Your eyes opened with a few blinks, settling down on Sunghoon, who laid next to you with his eyes capturing your each movement. You stiffened for a good second, remembering how hot his lips felt on your body the last night. 
“Fuck,” you groaned, hand on your head as the effects of hangover started to kick in. 
“Here,” he got up, passing you a bottle of water. 
“Hoon,” you started, not sure what to say about last night. 
“I’ll go,” he says, “I—I didn’t want to make things awkward between us,” he apologized, getting up quickly, putting his clothes on and leaving before you could say much. 
“Ugh,” you groaned, hating how the situation turned into what it shouldn’t have been, you wanted him, drunk and sober, in both states. 
But he didn’t know that. You were worried if he didn’t want that, or if his gestures were friendly all this time. 
His kisses weren’t friendly last night, your mind reminded you, and you let out a series of curses at that, at how desperately you had wanted him to be close to you, all this in a span of two days. 
Sunghoon was breathing hard by the time he locked his room, going straight in the shower.  He was frustrated. The hot water droplets paired with his flashbacks from the last night, the way you said his name in a whisper, the way your bikini fit you perfectly, and how you looked at him like you wanted him just as much as he did. 
He groaned, hand traveling down his skin to pump his semi hardened cock, gulping as images of you invaded his mind. With his head resting against the tiled wall, his fist moved on his length with speed, with need. 
He had never jerked off to the thought of anyone before you came into his life again, it was his first time and he admitted, he didn’t know that just the thought of your body pressed against his would make him this hard. 
With a moan escaping his lips, he painted the tiles white with his cum, your name leaving his lips as he stood there, breathing hard and deep in thought. 
He had to have you. 
Tonight. 
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“We’ll go first,” you tell Karina, getting ready together for the last night — the club night. 
“Sure, but why?” she asked, trying to perfect her already perfect liner. 
“I don’t wish to face Sunghoon,” you mumbled, sitting down on the bed to wear your heels. 
She stopped her movements, turning to look at you, “I thought you guys hooked up last night, it was going well, wasn’t it?” She asked, confused. 
“I don’t know, babe. He didn’t do anything yesterday because we were drunk, which was very sweet of him, but then he left this morning without talking about it,” you explained. 
“So talk tonight, and maybe do more cause you don’t have much time left,” she reminded you, “maybe go with Yeonjun’s plan too, Hoon would definitely reach out to you once he sees you with him. I’ve seen that he doesn’t really like when Jun’s with you, it shows on his face.”
“Really?” You asked with a frown, “making him jealous sounds very high school core to me.”
“So what? It works!” She smiled, “and I’m ready, how do I look?” 
“Stunning, gorgeous, perfect,” you answered, “and I think I’ll take up your advice this time.”
She smirked, “let’s go and get you your man,” she said, coming close to you, getting a shade of lipstick out which suits you through and through, knowing well that it’s the perfect opportunity to use it. 
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Flashy lights, loud music, drinks and dancing bodies everywhere. It was easy to spot Yeonjun on the DJ stage, vibing to the music feely. Life of the party as always. 
“Let’s grab some drinks,” Karina spoke in your ear, the music being too loud for you to hear much from a distance. 
You nodded, following her and smiling when you saw a few people from your batch standing there and drinking. 
“My ladies, you look hot,” Beomgyu said, kissing your knuckles and ordering drinks for you both. 
Seems like making Hoon jealous won’t be a problem after all, especially when everyone has a flirty nature. 
You weren’t going to drink today, you had to be sober and in your right mind, so you settled for orange juice instead, the music making you move on your own. 
“My lady!” Yeonjun spoke up, popping out of nowhere, pulling you into a hug before he came closer to whisper, “you look stunning,” his eyes shining as he said so, “but I don’t see lover boy, where’s he?” 
“Will be here soon I hope,” you replied. 
“Dance with me, he’ll definitely come sooner if he sees you with me,” he smirked as you took his hand, taking up on his offer. 
Yeonjun was a good company after all, your eyes widening at his bold moves before he pulled you in with a smirk, “lover boy’s here, and he’s looking at us,” he informed you, your eyes moving behind to look at him. 
Sunghoon was agitated, fuming almost with the sight in front of him. 
He wanted you all to himself, for tonight, tomorrow, and if possible by any means—forever, and he wasn’t going to shy away, not this time. 
“Are you just gonna stand and watch while he takes away your girl?” Jay asked from beside him. 
“Not today, not this time, Jay,” Hoon replied simply, his eyes following your actions, watching as Yeonjun took you to the bar, Gyu on the other side as you laughed about something you were talking about, whispering in each other’s ears. 
Sunghoon scoffed, rolling his eyes as he walked towards you. He didn’t wish to be nice all of a sudden, it was the last night, last possible chance for him to actually do something or regret sitting back forever. 
He stood right behind you at the bar, eyes fixated on your face, the shade of lipstick you had on suited you so perfectly that he wanted to ruin it by smashing his lips onto yours, turning you around in a single go and claiming you his. 
Instead, he tapped on your shoulder, successfully capturing your attention as you finally looked at him thoroughly — he was clad in black trousers, a loose black shirt with two top buttons kept open, his chest slightly on display. A delicate chain on his slender neck, hair parted to the side to match his look and his defined jaw clenched as he looked at you with a desire filled gaze.
His eyes held a different kind of intensity tonight, almost the kind you’d want to get lost in, his lips curved into an attractive smirk as he finally spoke. 
“May I steal you for a moment?” He asked. 
“Yeah,” you nodded mindlessly, gulping at how fine he looked. 
He didn’t wait for you to follow him, instead, he held on to your wrist and pulled you with him, your eyes widened at his bold move, your feet moving quicker to match his pace as he dragged you out from the back door, to an alleyway which was empty. 
“Sunghoon—” you called out his name, but he was quick to push you against the wall.
His eyes looked into yours, they were dark with a feeling you couldn’t quite understand before he leaned in, “remember what you said yesterday?” he asked, nose touching yours, frustration clear in his voice. 
“W—what?” Your voice came out shaky, his fingers on your arms were enough to make you shiver.
“Fuck, kitten. Forgot already?” He chuckled and you let out a shaky breath at how easily he called you such nicknames. 
“Forgot what?” You asked, looking into his hooded eyes. 
“That you wanted me to kiss you,” he leaned in further, his lips brushing against yours with his statement. 
“Yeah? And what about it?” you asked, trying to sound stern, as if your legs weren’t about to give out right this second. 
He scoffed, “I fucking bet you’d love it if Yeonjun would do that, won’t you?”
“I could be wrong, but I have a teeny tiny feeling that you are jealous, Hoon,” you replied, a small satisfactory smile on your face when you saw him scowl, your index finger resting on his clavicle. 
He tilted your head upwards, his slender fingers holding your chin up so you looked into his eyes, “fuck—yeah,” he breathed out, “yeah I am, because I fucking want you all to myself—” he confessed. 
“Fuck it,” you muttered midway his sentence, breaking your tough girl act and pulling him closer by his collar, your hand on his shoulder as you pressed your lips onto his. 
He was quick to react, pushing you against the wall harder while also pulling you closer by your ass, his other hand on your nape. His lips moved against yours in a perfect harmony, you felt your knees getting weaker as his soft lips kissed you with no intention of letting go—not now, not never. 
He separated your legs apart with his knees, pushing it in between them with ease, you pushed yourself further till you could feel his thigh in between your legs, applying pressure to your core which had you moaning into his mouth, almost to the point of drooling. 
“Fuck,” he cussed, separating your lips to place rushed kisses on your neck, your head tilting to give him space as you grinded on his thigh, head ringing with the high he gave you just with his kisses. 
“Ah—Hoon,” you whined, causing him to stop his actions, his slender fingers wrapping around your neck as he pulled you closer yet again, speaking against your lips. 
“I really thought I was over you after not meeting you for four fucking years, baby,” he almost growled, “but nah. I saw you at the party sitting next to me and I realized that I still want you, now more than ever,” he whispered, staring deep into your eyes. 
“I—I want you too, Hoon,” your voice came out breathy. 
He let out a low laugh at that, “you sure you don’t want Yeonjun?” 
He was jealous, he didn’t bother denying that and you admit you found this side of him hot, possessiveness clear in his eyes, which had turned even darker if it was possible. 
“His name wasn’t the one on my tongue when I touched myself last night, y’know,” you admitted, not missing the look of slight surprise on his face, “it was yours, only yours,” you tiptoed to whisper in his ear. 
A barely there smirk settled on your lips as you tried to leave, but Hoon was quick to pull you back, his hand on the back of your head as he pushed you against the wall yet again, and you loved how easily he handled you, as if your body moved the way he wanted it to. 
“You’ll be the death of me, kitten,” he said, “it makes me want to mark you up.”
“Why don’t you do it then?” you whispered, raising your brow as a challenge. 
He didn’t need to be told twice, his lips were on yours the very next second, your fingers tugging at his silky roots, sighing in exasperation with the wetness pooling in your underwear, your mind going fuzzy and your insides melting as you let him take control of you. 
He nips at your bottom lip, hand traveling down to cup your breasts, squeezing them lightly before he pinches your hardening nipples, your back arched into him as you feel a shiver going down your spine. 
Your short dress and its sheer fabric does nothing to help you, your skin feels as if it’s on fire with how passionately he kisses you, pulling you into him with desperation while pushing you back against the wall, your hand going under his shirt, tracing his faint abs softly. 
He knows it’s not even nearly appropriate to do this in public, but he can’t, for the life of him, stop his hands from roaming over the expanse of your body, from his fang-like canines to bite your clavicle and his eyes darkening from lust as he sees your body responding to him exactly how he wants to. 
“I won’t be able to stop myself anymore,” he grunted, taking your name.  
“Take me back to the hotel,” you breathed out, intertwining your fingers with his. 
He nodded fervently, hoping that his hard-on won’t be visible as he drags you through the sea of dancing bodies, biting his lip before you both get to the parking lot, getting into the car he had rented earlier. 
He tried his best to be a gentleman as he opened the car door for you, bending down to press another sloppy kiss on your lips, the atmosphere warm with how drunk he looked in your essence. 
It was hard for him to walk and get into the car himself, especially when you were right there, ready and just as desperate as him, your deep breaths only making him breathless. 
His hand rested on your thigh the whole fifteen minutes of the drive, inching upwards with docile squeezes which made you squirm in your seat, low whines leaving your mouth desperately. 
“Shh, baby. I’ll have to park the car right here if you keep making such sweet noises,” he warned. 
The offer was tempting—tempting enough for you to let out a moan, to which he did what he had to. He swiftly took a turn, parking the car at the empty lane, switching the engine off before he unbuckled his seatbelt. 
He turned your way, lips on yours as he unbuckled your belt too, a gasp leaving your lips as he effortlessly pulled you to his lap. 
“You’re so fucking pretty.” His thumb traced your lip, which you parted looking up at him with innocent eyes to suck on two of his digits, swirling your tongue around it, your cheeks hollow as you took it in. You could feel his hardened length just under your clothed cunt, which made you move your hips slightly, just to get a reaction out of him, testing the waters. 
However it backfired once he smirked against your lips, the warmth of his palm travelling up your body, resting on your clavicle as his fingers closed in around your neck, giving it a gentle squeeze before he thrusted up. 
You moaned, struggling to keep your eyes open.  
“I want you, please!” you begged, unbuckling his belt as he watched your every move. 
“I can’t believe I get to have you now,” he says. 
“What do you mean?” You stop to look at him, arms around his neck. 
He puts his arm around your waist, picking you up slightly to get rid of his pants and boxers, “you’re the only fucking person I’ve ever wanted,” he says, whispering your name right after, eyes on your dress strap which slid down your shoulder, “tell me what you want, baby.”
Every word he spoke, every sound he made, it all caused an influx of this feeling in your chest—your heart raced, butterflies erupting into a wild fashion as your face heated up with the depth of this situation. 
“You. All of you,” you answered in a beat, “I can’t wait anymore, I can’t stop thinking about you, Sunghoon,” you said. 
“You don’t have to,” he whispered, kissing a sensitive spot below your ear, “don’t fucking stop, kitten,” he mumbled as he licked your neck, his fingers pulling your panties to the side simultaneously, pressing them to your wetness. 
You held onto his shoulders as he rubbed your sensitive folds, his cock poking at your entrance alongside, “such pretty moans,” he groaned, feeling you being a mess in his arms, “all for me?” 
“All for y—you!” Your words came out in fragments, legs shaking as he pushed his fingers inside you, your back arching into him yet again. His lips were busy planting kisses all over your tits, ensuring not to leave a single spot, pushing your dress down to reveal every bit of you.  
Sunghoon was a patient person, but not when it came to you. You were driving him insane with just how vulnerable and needy you appeared to be in his arms, his eyes fixated on how your chest rose up and down, his own sweat making his hair stick to his forehead, your breaths intertwining as he plunged his fingers harder into you.
Your nails dug into his shoulders, strong enough to leave crescent marks, the sound of your low moans, his grunted murmurs, and the deep breaths interfolded impeccably with the music playing on the radio, reverberating through the car. 
Once he felt like you were prepped enough, dripping on his fingers, he swiftly pulled you up, pressing his lips upon yours as he pushed you down on his cock, your walls clenching around his length, the stretch too pleasurable for it to hurt you. 
Your fingers curled around the fabric of his shirt, scrunching it up as to support yourself against his body, each touch of his igniting your senses. His muscles tensed beneath your touch as your hand unbuttoned his shirt, the cold of your hand juxtaposing the warmth radiating his body.
“You’re not real,” he mused, mesmerized, “so fucking pretty, taking my cock like that.” Sunghoon knew he was far gone when it concerned you, but now that you were actually here, closer to him than ever, he couldn’t help but let his mouth run loose to tell you just how stunning you were. 
“You’re mine tonight, huh?” 
“So—so fucking yours,” you moaned. 
He scoffed, grabbing your jaw to make you look at him, “say it, clearly.” 
“I’m so fucking yours Sunghoon,” you gasped, feeling him twitch hard inside of you. 
“That’s it, that’s my good little kitty,” he chuckled against your mouth, kissing your swollen lips yet again. 
You both muttered a string of curses before you started shifting your hips, his hands on your waist guiding you up and down, eyes closing but he was quick to grab your neck, “look at me when I fuck you,” he said, bucking his hips up to meet yours. 
He loved how you looked, hair messy, lips swollen and eyes slightly teary as you tried to form coherent sentences but failed miserably, all of which Sunghoon loved. 
You were just as gone for him as he was for you. 
“Can you feel what you’re doing to me?” He asked, taking your hand and pressing it to your lower abdomen where you could feel the bulge of his cock sliding in and out effortlessly, given how wet you were, practically dripping all over his lap and the car seat, something that the rental company wouldn’t really appreciate but that was the least of your worries. 
“Gonna make you scream my name till the windows fog up with your desperation,” he rasped near your ear and you couldn’t function anymore, not when the hottest man ever had you spiralling for him.  
“Sunghoon, H—hoon!” Your voice got louder as you did exactly what he had promised you’d do, making him chuckle against your neck, nipping on the skin with the intentions of leaving marks, his marks, “slow, please!”
You were lying to yourself by now, you didn’t want him to be slow, you just weren’t sure how much you can take before you lose the final string of your sanity—if there’s any left, that is. 
“God,” Sunghoon mumbled, “slow? I’ll fuck you hard enough you’ll feel me in your cunt for days, kitten.”
“Fucking hell, I—I’m close,” you moaned, your nails digging into his shoulder. 
“Let go, baby,” he said, groaning as he felt your juices coating his dick, your moans louder than before, eyes closed and his name like a mantra on your lips. 
He grunted, rubbing your clit as he slid out of your pussy, stroking his cock until he spilled his cum all over your inner thigh. 
“I’m not done with you yet,” he breathed out, “not so quick.” 
You were fucked, quite literally. He kissed you, once, twice, and again till he was moaning in your mouth, so dazed he could barely function for a minute when you tried catching your breath. 
He helped you get into your seat again, not even bothering to put his shirt on as he drove back, jaw clenched, your eyes on him the entire time, pussy tingling as his hand squeezed your thigh every two seconds. 
And he didn’t lie, his movements were more frantic than ever as he drove back to the hotel with record speed, making sure to stay and help you look presentable, the small touches of him all over your face made you feel an feeling which you couldn’t quite name, it was indescribable, but you knew it gave you butterflies. 
And you wondered how this guy who fucked you so roughly not even ten minutes back could also be this sweet and caring, kissing you every chance he got. 
You giggled as you ran into the elevator, a smile gracing his own face at your giddy mood, “I don’t want this night to end,” he confessed. 
“It won’t end just yet,” you said, taking out your room card and opening the door, which he closed equally soon as he pushed you against the wood. 
He looked perfect, swollen red lips, shirt barely buttoned, hair all over the place, and eyes so shiny as if he held a whole universe in them, or maybe that was just your reflection. 
“Kitten,” he sighed, “let me taste you,” he requested. 
You looked at him with teasing eyes, a smile of the same fashion gracing your face as you went on, unzipping your dress and moving towards your bed while facing Sunghoon, letting the dress fall along with your underwear, uncovering your bare body to him, as if offering the last morsel of meal to a hungry man. 
He unbuttoned his shirt, discarding all his garments. You could finally see him in light, his eyes hooded, body sculpted by the gods themselves, the v-line and his big cock making you gulp as you remembered how good he felt inside you. 
“Get on the bed,” he ordered you, to which you obliged. 
“God, such a good little girl for me, spread your pretty legs and let me see you, baby,” he spoke, getting in between your legs, his chain dangling down. 
The nickname made you shiver, Park Sunghoon made you feel weak, in all the best ways, the way he kissed your thighs, inching closer to your inner thighs, so close to your core which was still wet, all of this made you breathless. 
A pathetic whine of Sunghoon’s name slipped past your lips the exact second he licked your pussy, his big hands keeping your legs open, “eyes on me,” he spoke against your wetness, humming at the taste. 
He wastes no time in immersing his tongue into your pussy, licking and sucking as you panted, thighs shaking, his tongue tracing your vulva, groans vibrating against your folds, your hips bucking up into his mouth as he delved deeper, pushing his tongue into you. 
Your soft folds made him growl, nuzzling closer. Nothing was enough, he couldn’t get enough of you, even the scent of your arousal had his cock twitching, it was harder than ever, almost painful at this point, his nose nuzzling deeper, brushing against your heat. 
“H—hoon,” you cried, a tear streaming down your face, your fingers tugging on his hair, which only urged him to growl more into your cunt. 
It was so raw, so filthy. 
You feel ecstatic as his thumb probes at your narrow depths, stimulating your clit while he pushes his tongue in, “want you so much,” he spoke against you. 
“Hoon! Please, can’t wait anymore,” you said, pussy swollen and you needed his cock inside you. 
“So needy, and for me?” He asked cockily. 
“Y—yes! Please,” you begged. 
“How can I say no when you ask so nicely?” He comes up, kissing you, making you taste yourself on his tongue.
His chain dangled around your collarbone, his intense gaze focused on your expressions as he pumped his cock a few times, his tip on your entrance. 
He spit into your mouth, diving right in to kiss and capture your moan.
He pushed himself in with a swift movement, bottoming out. He asked if you felt fine, giving you time to adjust, he moved in and out of you swiftly, body pressed against your warm one, his each thrust getting deeper with the roll of his hips. 
You could swear you had never felt this way before, he hit your g-spot so precisely, and the feeling of him being inside you, all raw and thick, made you mewl with pleasure. 
“You look so pretty,” he groaned, licking your neck where he had just marked you, “falling apart on my cock like that.”
Your toes curled each time he opened his mouth to whisper something filthy into your ear, making your head spin in a good way. 
He couldn’t take his eyes off of you, your fucked out face, swollen lips and the innocent eyes begging him to go faster made it harder for him to hold back. He, in fact, didn't wish to hold back anymore.
He thrusted in harder, squeezing your tit as you cried out his name, your walls clenching around him, making his length twitch as his fingers dug into your ass, pulling you closer, your tits pressed against his chest, his eyes wild and desperate. 
“Can’t get enough of you, it’s like your body was made for me,” he smirked lazily, fangs showing as you told him how you can’t wait any longer, you can’t hold back any longer. 
He was just as desperate, not being able to hold his dick twitching in you with a need to release. 
“Cum in me!” You moaned out. 
That drove him over the edge. You filled with his cum? His warmth dripping out of your soft little cunt? Fuck, he could burst his load right into you but he needed you to be completely, truly okay with it. 
“Y/N, are you sure?” He asked, cupping your face, leaning in to brush his nose against yours, foreheads pressed as he breathed in deeply to control himself, just like you, a different kind of warmth spreading through your body. 
He had never done that before, neither had you, however, you wanted nothing more than to experience it for the first time and you wanted it with each other. 
You nodded, “yes—yes please,” before he pushed his cock harder, as you rutted your hips absentmindedly to ride out your high.
The room smelled like sex, the mist clouding it as your sounds resonated the walls, you didn’t even try to conceal your voices anymore, the dim lights only made the atmosphere hotter. 
“Oh, fuck!” He grunted. 
Your orgasm ripped through you as you pulled his nape closer for his lips to be on yours, his own climax rushing as you felt the warming sensation of Sunghoon’s cum filling your cunt up to the brim. 
You both stilled, taking deep breaths and coming down from your state of euphoria, gulping as you saw him looking right at you. 
“C’mere,” he said softly, getting up and watching his cum dripping down on your sheets, gulping as the tip of his ears getting red. 
You couldn’t get up, only looking up at Hoon with teary eyes, he swore you looked like a broken puppy to him, which only made him wanna scoop you up in his arms, his muscles flexing yet again as he held you up, kissing the corner of your eye, tasting the salty tear that escaped, courtesy of his cock which provided you with the best orgasm of your life. 
“Fuck—ah,” you whimpered, only boosting his ego.
You couldn’t walk, he made it happen. 
Which made it his duty to take care of you, biting down on his smile, he chuckled, making you groan and slap his shoulder, only causing him to laugh without hesitation this time, you swore it was the prettiest laugh ever. 
“You alright, love?” He asked, eyes shining as you nodded, both walking towards the bathroom.  
“God—don’t say that,” you mumbled, shyness creeping through. 
“What? My love?” He said again, smiling as he emphasized again. 
“Hoonie,” you warned and he only kissed you again, before you pushed him playfully, stepping into the shower, barely holding yourself up. 
“Need help, princess?” He asked, eyebrows raised as he stared at your body, and you gave him a look, almost surprised to see him getting hard again. 
Oh boy, was he crazy for you. 
“In the shower?” You raised your own brows. 
“Well, I fear if I was the one who filled you up with my cum, I should be the one to help you clean it,” he whispered, getting into the shower, closing the glass door behind him, sneaking his hand up your waist. 
“You’re crazy,” you said, looking up at him with a grin which you did try hard to conceal. 
“Hey, it also helps us save water,” he added, smile widening, before he leaned in, lips on your neck, as you felt the warmth of the water cascading down your bodies. 
“Missed this?” He asked, shoving his hand between your legs, “god, you’re so full of my cum,” he chuckled proudly as you shivered in his arms. 
Sunghoon wasn’t usually this confident, however, seeing you breathless, whimpering and asking for more even though he had just destroyed your cunt was doing something to him, he couldn’t help but admire the sight—something he’d never get used to. 
He was gonna get what he’s wanted all along, once wasn’t enough, even a thousand times won’t be enough, he wanted you for the course of his lifetime, eerily romantic thought for someone who was fucking the girl of his dreams in a shower. Lovely. 
You pulled him in for another rushed kiss, feeling him smirk against you, chasing your lips as you tried to move back in hopes of whining, but he was greedy enough to grab your nape, greedy enough to swallow all your moans, keeping it for himself. 
“Fucking hell,” he muttered, fingers teasing your cunt, or what he’d like to say, cleaning your cunt which he so nastily claimed, “not clean enough, hm? I think we’ll have to use a deeper approach.”
“You’re fucking crazy,” you panted, his cock lining up against your wet cunt, and you could only look up at him. 
His hair sticking to his forehead, water droplets dripping down his face to your cheek, steam fogging up the glass door as you tried to keep yourself up on the slick tiled surface, his muscles flexing as his veiny hand held you up, his grunt loud as he pushed himself into you yet again tonight. 
His thrusts were languid as you tried your hardest to breathe, his head leaning down, with his mouth open, practically breathing you. 
“I fucked you so hard and yet you’re so fucking tight,” he grunted, “god—baby, you feel so fucking good,” he muttered. “So fucking good—fucking perfect—mine.”
“Yours,” you mewled out, eyes closing with each of his hard thrust. 
Lasting long wasn’t an option, not when you were this close to reaching euphoria, but it was different this time, and you feared what might happen if he went on like this. His cock was so thick, also the biggest you’d ever taken, to the point you could feel its bulge on your lower abdomen.  
“Can’t—can’t anymore,” you stuttered, legs shivering to the point your knees gave out and Hoon held you up with ease. 
“Doing so good for me baby, let go, hm? Be a good little slut for me,” he rasped. 
That tumbled you over the edge, your eyes rolling back as you let out the loudest moan of Sunghoon’s name, thighs shaking as a jet of liquid gushed out of your quivering slit, surprising the boy who let out a groan, filling your cunt again as you squirting all over his cock, the sensation overwhelming you to the point your body almost fell limp in his arms, panting harshly as Sunghoon moaned. 
“Did you just—” 
“I didn’t—know I could,” you mumbled, hiding your face in his neck, embarrassment creeping through. 
He breathed in deeply, kissing you again, “that was the hottest fucking thing you could have done, baby” he mumbled against your lips, “you’re perfect, you did so well for me, you’re my good girl.”
Sunghoon barely held himself up, the way you reacted to him, the way you looked when you let yourself loose, it was going to be etched in his mind forever. 
It took you both a while to calm down again, and he kissed you all over to do so, soft pecks all over your face, making you smile lazily at his sudden cuteness. He made sure you were clean and helped you shower properly this time before coming out. 
Sunghoon was clingy, absolutely not having it in him to leave your side, observing every move of yours as if trying to memorize every bit of you, even making sure you’re clad in his shirt as you both made your way towards the bed, a soft glow gracing your faces.
“Hey,” he said, getting into the covers with you. 
“Hey,” you turned towards him, still feeling giddy. 
“I can’t believe you’re real,” he said, touching your cheeks softly. 
“Why would you say that?” You asked, keeping your hand on his. 
“Before tonight, I had only ever dreamed of being this close to you, I never thought I’d even get to kiss you,” he spoke. 
“Hoon, I’ve been thinking about you since we met again,” you told him, brushing his hair with your fingers softly, “actually, ever since I got the invite,” you confessed sheepishly. 
That made him smile, “can I ask you something?” 
You hummed, “yes?” 
“Can we, maybe, if you’re okay with it then y’know—” he fumbled with his words, making you laugh, even the slight lisp of his was so perfect. 
“Shh, we’ll talk tomorrow, yeah? Hold me to sleep, Hoonie,” you said, putting your arm around him. 
His heart melted at the sight, and what made him happier was the fact that you didn’t just want him for sex, your smile expressed it all. The thought of you actually liking him back, reciprocating his feelings made his heart beat faster, anticipating a future with you. 
“Good night, baby,” he kissed you, just like last night. However, he kissed your lips tonight, making you giggle softly as you held onto him tighter. 
He stared at you, not being able to hide his smile and wondering how he could ask you out again, especially when it would be easy for him to meet you since you both lived in Seoul. 
The trip was officially over, and you could proudly admit that you loved every second of it. 
Your flight was the same as Jay and Sunghoon’s, courtesy of you living in the same city, in which he couldn’t help but keep his eyes fixed on your seat. He appeared to be a pathetic puppy who couldn’t help but stare at his owner, gone to the point he picked the same movie to watch as you, talk about being a stalker in love. 
Jay was sitting next to Hoon and he desperately wished he could kick Jay out and ask you to be next to him but he managed to behave these few hours. He was happy as long as he could look at your pretty face. 
Both Jay and Karina screamed in shock when Sunghoon kissed you at the airport before leaving for their own apartments, he wasn’t shy about his, almost boasting in a way to show off how you were his, almost. 
A text popped up on your notification panel as soon as you reached your place, still smiling like a madman while answering all the questions Karina threw your way. 
Hoon <3: hey i was wondering if you’d like to go out with me sometime? 
You: as friends?
Hoon <3:  god, baby c’mon 
You: as friends? 🥺
Hoon <3: Y/N what if i kms 
You: as friends? 😁
Hoon <3:  okay, fine 😔 nooo, as something more :(
You: fuckk you’re so cute like a puppy
Hoon <3:  oh
You:  don’t tell me… you like being called that? 
Hoon <3: why don’t you try and say it then the next time i’m deep inside your cunt?
You:  oh fuck
Hoon <3: is that a yes baby?
You:  what if it is? 
Hoon <3: that’ll make me very very happy, princess 
You:  AHAAHDHSJ text me the date and time 😚
You smiled, loving how things had changed from the first time he asked you that question. 
It was indeed a reunion that you could never forget. 
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4K notes ¡ View notes
delulumel ¡ 2 months ago
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Attention
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Jungwon!bf x f!reader
Trope: established relationship, smut with some plot, a little bit of angst, fluff
Warnings: smut 18+ MDNI , p in v, praise, degrade, spanking, rough sex, fingering, no protection (don’t do it), breeding. Tell me if I forgot something.
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The apartment is quiet when Jungwon finally gets home, his jacket slung over his shoulder, exhaustion lining his frame. He’s barely spoken all week, lost in his own head and you’ve had enough.
“You’re late.” you say from the couch.
He pauses, blinking at you like he’s surprised you are still awake. “Yeah, sorry.”
You stand crossing your arms. “That’s it?”
Jungwon sighs, running a hand through his hair. “What do you want me to say?”
“I want you to talk to me.” you snap, stepping closer. “You’ve been ignoring me for days.”
His eyes darkened, flickering over your face—annoyance, frustration, then something hotter. “You want my attention?” He murmurs, tilting his head. “Then take it.”
The challenge in his voice sends a thrill down your spine, but you don’t back down. “Or what?”
Jungwon moves fast, crowding you against the wall, his hands gripping your waist. “Or I’ll make you.”
It all happened fast. His mouth crashes into yours, all teeth and desperation. You moan into the kiss, arching against him. He’s rough, biting your lip hard enough to hurt and you whimper—not in pain, but in need.
“That’s it,” he growls, pulling back just enough to see your face. “You’ve been waiting for this haven’t you? Acting all pissy just so I would fuck you?”
You gasp as his hand slides between your thighs, fingers pressing hard over your clothed cunt. “N-no—”
“Liar.” His grip tightens and you squirm. “You love this. You love winding me up until I can’t think straight.”
You whine as he yanks your pants down, fingers slipping beneath your panties to find you already soaked, he chuckles. “Pathetic. You’re dripping all over my hand, like the little slut you are.”
“I should punish you, don’t you think? Your behaviour is unacceptable.” Your eyes widened, you opened your mouth to protest but he interrupted you.
“You are gonna count to three for me, okay?” He said while bending you over the table.
You quickly feel a sting on your ass. “O-one.” you almost forgot, tears picking at your eyes.
Another slap.
“T-two.” you stutter, the stinging sensation turned into pleasure.
Another slap. “Louder.”
“T-three.” You moaned.
He hums, rubbing the redness away before dragging your panties down. “Good girl.”
The praise makes your stomach flip. Then his fingers are pushing inside you, curling just right and you are moaning, rocking back against his hand.
“Fuck, you are so tight.” He groaned, adding a second finger. “Gonna take my cock so well, baby. Gonna make you scream.”
You are already close, thighs shaking but he pulls his fingers out, ignoring your frustrated noise.
“Not yet,” He tuts, unbuckling his belt. “You don’t get to come until I say so.”
When he finally pushes into you, it’s with one brutal thrust, filling you completely. You gasp, nails digging into the table as he sets a punishing pace, each snap of his hips driving you higher.
“That’s it.” He pants, gripping your hair to yank your hair back. “Take it. You wanted me to fuck you? Then take it.”
You’re sobbing now, overstimulated but desperate for more and when his hand slips around to rub your clit, you shatter, clenching around him as you come.
Jungwon follows soon after, groaning your name as he spills inside you, his body collapsing over yours.
-
Later, he gathers you against his chest, his fingers tracing patterns in your skin. “You okay?” He murmurs, voice softer now. You nod, exhausted and he presses a kiss to your temple—a silent promise that the roughness was another kind of worship.
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A/S: On my period but still thinking about smut😭Hope you like it my horny besties.💋 If you see any typos, pretend it isn’t there.
455 notes ¡ View notes
delulumel ¡ 2 months ago
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magnum opus :: [H.H] x reader
read on AO3
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summary: you get a call at 3AM from a number you should've blocked ages ago. you subsequently make three mistakes.
pairing: hwang hyunjin x reader
tropes: exes to lovers, artist!hyunjin, artist x muse, grapheme-color and emotional synesthesia, angst-to-smut, post breakup yearning, hurt-comfort kinda
smut warning: semi drunk sex, dry humping, desperate hyunjin (like, very desperate), begging, biting, pussy eating, slow, needy sex, unprotected sex (use condoms ppl), slightly dubious consent at first, vaginal fingering
content warning: hyunjin has a drinking problem, mentions of past arguments and previous toxic behaviors
word count: 10.9k
author's note: this was supposed to be another plotless smut but I couldn't help myself lol. also i did not edit this. if you see typos no you didn't. enjoy!
A sound penetrates your subconscious, worming its way into your dream until you blink awake, eyes dry and not yet used to the darkness of your room. It takes a second to orient yourself, to recognize that the sound is real and coming from your phone. The digital clock by your charger reads 3:24 AM.
Had you been more awake, you would recognize the ringtone, or would have seen the caller ID. This is mistake number one of the night.
You swipe accept on the call, eyes still blurry and thick with sleep. You clear your throat, which proves useless when your words still come out croaky and garbled.
“Hello?”
“Hi, pretty girl.”
It feels like ice has been doused down your spine. You shoot straight up in bed, the hairs at the nape of your neck standing fully at attention. 
You know this voice. 
It's an entirely unique voice. A voice splattered with colors and textures you can't begin to comprehend. But even if it weren't, you know it would still be etched in your brain forever. Your hand shakes as you pull the phone from your ear to glance at the contact name.
‼️DO NOT ANSWER (Hyunjin)‼️
Oh fuck.
This has to be a dream.
You hear his voice crackle through the speakers one more time, his words unclear with the distance you created. Hyunjin shouldn't be calling you, and you certainly shouldn't have answered. It would be wise to hang up, to block his number like you thought about doing so many times. Instead, when you hear more crackling as he continues speaking, you hold your breath as you put the phone back to your ear.
This is mistake number two.
“-- you there, love?”
You swallow thickly, willing your mind to wake up faster so you can fully comprehend what is happening. You feel like you're floating. Or drowning.
"I didn't expect you to pick up."
Your heart hammers in your chest.
"Are you okay?" You ask after a few beats of silence. It's the only thing you can think to ask.
You hear a deep hum of contentment. “Yeah. Better now.”
The air in the room suddenly feels too cold. You should hang up. You need to hang up. But your fingers refuse to uncurl from the death grip you have on your phone. “Why… why are you calling me?”
You hear the distant sounds of the city on his end of the line, padded by his breathing. It sounds labored. Manual, like he's reminding himself every so often to inhale and exhale, too busy chasing a fading feeling. You could recognize that specific pattern of his breath anywhere. You close your eyes, letting out a deep sigh.
"Are you drunk?"
"No," he murmurs. "Maybe. I don't know."
That translates to a yes.
You pinch the bridge of your nose with your fingers. This is why you don't answer his calls. This is why you should've blocked him months ago. You feel the tension of the moment fizzle into nothing but annoyance. "It's four in the morning. Why did you call me?"
Hyunjin lets out a soft whine, his breath picking up.
"I miss you."
His words land like a punch to your chest, knocking the wind out of you. A simple string of words in that pitiful, whining tone of his, and you already feel like putty in his hands.
You hate this. You hate him.
You want to scream at him. Tell him that this is bullshit. He's bullshit. That you've been trying so hard to stay away from him. But your heart is pounding so hard that you can feel it in your throat.
"No you don't,” you decide to be civil. “You're just drunk."
"But I know what I'm saying."
The civility only lasts so long. “Oh, fuck off," you breathe. There is no real power behind it, but it's better than nothing. "Don't say stuff like that."
He starts to speak, but a nearby train cuts him off. You think about taking the opportunity to hang up, but as much as you don't want to hear what he says next, you're powerless to stop yourself from listening.
"I missed your voice so much, pretty girl." The laziness of his tongue makes the words sound like something entirely new. "I missed hearing you say my name. Can you do that for me, baby? Can you say my name? Please?"
His words are slurred and heavy. You shouldn't be entertaining this. He won't remember this conversation in the morning, too busy with his extravagant artist lifestyle and the swarms of other girls that want his attention. You'll be a distant memory floating around his hippocampus with nothing to tether to, like an itch he will never find.
"Why?"
He lets out a shaky breath, the undercurrent of a whine coating his tone. "Please, baby." The desperation in his voice fills your chest and makes it squeeze tight. "Say it for me?"
You are weak to his voice, but the distant, angrier part of you refuses to let it affect you. He doesn't get to just call you in the middle of the night and ask you to talk to him. Not when he's had months to do that and hasn't bothered.
"No."
You hear him swallow thickly, a slight shift in his breathing as he lets out a short, humorless laugh. You wait for him to speak again, but you're met with nothing but silence. It stretches long enough that you wonder if he hung up, but then—
"I miss you so much, angel."
Six words.
It's only six words, but they hurt worse than anything else he could've said to you. You don't know if it's because you think he doesn't mean them, or because you hope that he does.
Regardless, emotion swells so quickly in your chest, you feel like you're going to be sick. You can't do this. You can't keep letting him do this to you.
"I have to go," you say finally, voice trembling.
"Don't hang up." He sounds panicked. "Please don't hang up. I need to hear your voice."
Your face feels hot, the back of your nose beginning to burn. You will not let him hear you cry. "No, Hy–” You stop yourself. “I can't do this with you anymore."
"Please, baby. Please. I need you. I can't stop thinking about you. I miss you."
That damned phrase again. Your breath stutters in your chest, words coming out softer than you intend. "You don't mean that."
"I do, pretty girl. I promise."
You shake your head as if he could see you. You wish he could see you through the phone— to see what exactly he's done to you, how he destroyed you. You know he doesn't mean any of this, that they're just the chosen lies from tonight's bottle of vodka.
There's shuffling on the line for a second. Then—
"Can I see you. Please?"
You close your eyes, the tears you tried so hard to fight spilling over and sliding down your face until they make fat plopping noises on your sheets. No. He can't see you. You can't do this with him anymore. You need to hang up. This has to stop.
"Okay."
And this is your final, biggest mistake.
—
You're not sure why, but you don't believe he'll actually show up.
You've played this game with him before, right after the two of you broke up. You remember the anxious anticipation whirling in your stomach while you waited for him one night, and how the first rays of the sunrise curdled it in your stomach. You suppose his way with words was what made him a good artist anyway—there is no surprise there.
So when you hear two raps at your front door, there is some surprise there.
You wipe the tears from your face quickly, running a hand through your hair and praying it isn't as wild as it feels. You glance in the mirror by your front door, giving yourself a once-over to make sure you're presentable enough, but you shake your head and stop yourself. It's not like he hasn't seen you at your worst before.
When you open the door, Hyunjin is standing in front of you, illuminated only by the soft glow of the street lamps on your block. He looks exhausted.
"Hi, angel."
You blink slowly, suddenly regretting every decision that brought you to this moment.
"You're here."
He smiles. It doesn't reach his eyes. "You look tired. Did I wake you up?"
You fight the urge to roll your eyes at his question, stepping aside to let him in. "Yes. It's four in the morning. Obviously you did."
He has the decency to at least look sheepish as he stumbles past you, looking around your apartment with a faraway expression on his face. You can smell the alcohol on him. It makes you incredibly dizzy.
He toes his shoes off and you watch him quietly, something stirring in your chest. He remembers. You didn't have to remind him about the no-shoe rule.
The realization sends a course of emotion through you that you cannot parse, so instead, you choose to focus on shutting and locking the door behind you.
It's been a full six months since Hyunjin has been in your apartment. It may not be that long in the grand scheme of things, but the two of you used to spend almost every waking moment together, especially when you were dating. You had grown accustomed to having him around so much, his absence left an aching hole in your life, your home, your bed.
When you gain the courage to turn around, you see that he's standing at the threshold of your living room. Hyunjin looks like he belongs here, yet somehow he also doesn't. This isn't the same Hyunjin from your final weeks together—the one that you screamed at until you couldn't breathe. This isn't the same Hyunjin that, in the middle of your last fight, pressed himself against the front door, caging you in your own apartment while you cried and begged him to let you leave.
That Hyunjin was different. He had meticulously styled hair and sunglasses that cost more than your rent. He was swimming in his quick rise to success, riding the wave and content to let you drown under him.
You look at present-Hyunjin, who's now peeling off the hood of his oversized sweater. There are no sunglasses.  no neatly styled hair. They are replaced by a blonde buzzcut, and watery, red eyes that cannot stay focused.
It would be easy to see him as a stranger, an intrusion, but you can't. It just feels like he's come home.
You're staring for so long, you don't realize until he looks over at you from his awkward stance by the couch.
"Are you gonna come over here?"
You take a few steps toward him, but not too close. You are a flame and he is a gas leak. You will both explode on contact.
You choose, instead, to play offense. "What are you doing here?"
He looks around your living room, fingers twitching like they're begging for something to hold. He won't meet your gaze. After a bit, he lets out a deep exhale.
"I don't know."
"Why did you call me?"
"I don't know."
"Do you know anything?”
He glances at you, his already watery eyes looking dejected and tearful, and your heart stutters in your chest. You wish you could hold steady to your hate for him. Sometimes it slips through your fingers like sand, leaving you scrambling to catch the pieces. Other times it's solid as glass. You wish it was always like that. You want to shove it in his face and let him suffocate under the weight of it.
But that look. The tears, the pain. You recognize it. It's a mirror of the same look you gave him when he broke up with you: heartbreak, rejection, confusion. 
You can't do this. You're going to cry. Or pass out. He shouldn't have come.
You open your mouth to say just that when he turns fully toward you, closing the gap a bit more. He's always towered over you– he's six feet tall and you're barely 5’1 on a good day– yet you find the intrusion surprising for a moment. You trail your sight all the way up to gaze into those red, unfocused eyes.
"You never say my name anymore," he says, the slur in his speech making a subtle appearance. He's wobbly on his feet. "Never on the phone, and not once since I've been here. Why?"
The question takes you by surprise. "What?"
"My name," he presses. He takes a step toward you, his presence pushing you one step back. "Why don't you say it anymore?"
You take another step back as he advances. You're not scared of him, you never could be, but the closer he gets the faster your heart beats. He's staring at you with an intensity you've never seen before, not even when you were together.
"I don't know," you echo. The lie is bitter in your mouth.
"Yes you do." He looks at you with those unfocused eyes, hurt flashing across his features. He takes another step. "You do know. You used to say it all the time, like my name was..." He trails off, his fingers twitching at his sides again, like he's trying to grasp something invisible. "Like it was yours."
You take a final step back, your spine hitting the wall. Hyunjin doesn't stop until he's a single step away from you, his chest so close to yours that you have to tilt your head back to look at him.
"Don't,” you warn.
"Say it," he pleads. His hands are shaking, and you're beginning to recognize that it's not the effects of the alcohol, but a raw desperation. He's literally shaking with need. "Please. Just once."
You exhale slowly through your nose, willing your anger to come to the forefront. You feel the start of it in your bones, boiling hot and ready to lash out.“Why would I say it now? You only listened when it was convenient for you.”
His brow furrows, confusion warring with the lingering haze of alcohol. "What are you talking about?"
The words feel hot like bile in your stomach, the heat of your anger boiling everything in you. He's too close. You're getting too angry. You should stop now, kick him out and block his number. 
But Hyunjin closes the gap, his shaking hand reaching to cup your face. He barely connects with your skin before you feel the explosion.
"Don't touch me," you bark, jerking away from his hand. The hurt that flashes across his face only fuels your anger more. "You don't get to do this. You don't get to-- to come here, drunk and desperate, pretending like you care about what my voice means to you–"
"I do care," he insists, his voice cracking. "I've always—"
"No, you don't," The words tear from your throat, sharp and raw. You put both hands on his chest and shove him away from you with all of your strength. He stumbles back, but he's still not far enough.
"You stopped caring the minute that painting made you famous. The minute everyone wanted to know about the hot new painter with synesthesia and raw talent.”
It’s the first time you've said the words out loud. They taste like acid on your lips, and you hate that, but not more than how much you hate the way your eyes burn with tears.
You let the weight of your words settle between the two of you like a boulder in the ocean. You watch as Hyunjin grimaces, and internal war showing on his face before he lets out a deep breath, dragging his hands down his face and turning to take several steps away from you.
You don't want to feel bad for him. He deserves this. He deserves every ounce of pain you're feeling. 
You remember that conversation you had over a year ago, tangled in his messy sheets with your head on his bare chest. Your relationship was still new, still tender. The honeymoon phase seemed neverending.
As you laid there, his heartbeat was, at first, a steady pulse against your ear, but the longer you two basked in the afterglow, the faster it got.
You remember sitting up after a minute, hands cupping his face in concern. "What is it, Hyun?"
"I... I have something to tell you," he murmured.
He told you about his synesthesia, how it was his inspiration for pursuing art, but also an insecurity he struggled to coexist with. You listened to him, comforted him, encouraged him, loved him. Told him how amazing he was and how every little quirk of his just made him better.
A few months later, he was kissing you awake and saying he had a surprise for you. When you walked into his living room, you saw the most gorgeous painting you'd ever seen-- a canvas segmented into 4 sections, each section similar in their subject but distinct in composition.
"It's, uh. It's you," he explained, ears burning red at the tips. "Not a portrait of you, but this is how it looks when you say my name. When you're sleepy, when you're laughing, when you're upset with me, and when you... when we--"
He didn't need to finish his sentence. You knew.
It was you that encouraged him to submit it to a contest a couple weeks after that. It was you who picked out his outfit for his first gallery showing. It was you who said his name over and over the night after while he showed you just how he got the inspiration for that last panel.
And yet.
"You cast me aside."
You wipe at the tears that have traitorously slipped from your eyes. "I was behind you through all of that, and then you let the sounds of the attention you got become louder than me. I didn't mean anything to you anymore."
Silence stretches between you like a chasm. Hyunjin's shoulders rise and fall with each labored breath, his back still turned to you. The air in the apartment feels suffocating, thick with everything that's been said and has yet to be said. 
You don't even know why you're doing this, why you're bothering to explain anything to him when he's drunk. It'll be gone from his mind in the morning, and then what will have been the point?
You close your eyes and let your head thud against the wall. “Look. You should–”
"I never meant to make you feel invisible," he says.
You take a steadying breath. 
He carries on, his voice rough in the silence. "It was intoxicating. The praise, the intrigue, the attention-- I was seeing so many colors and shapes I'd never seen before. I'd never had so many people find it– find me interesting. Or worth something.
Your voice is small. “You had me.”
He turns back to you. There are tears streaked on his face, and the raw vulnerability in his eyes makes your heart twist in your chest. “I know. But I got lost in it– in the attention. I was drowning in so many colors that meant nothing because they weren't yours. But I didn't realize that until you weren't around anymore."
You want to stay angry. You want to hold onto the hurt that's kept you safe these past months. But seeing him like this— almost as broken as you'd been feeling —cracks something open inside of you.
"Do you know what the worst part is?” At his silence, you continue. “I was, and still am, so proud of you.” Your voice is quieter now, more tired than angry. "Even when it hurt, even when it felt like you used me. I was proud."
Hyunjin opens his mouth to say something, but the words die on his lips. You watch him swallow, hard, the deliberate bob of his Adam's apple catching your gaze. In everything he does, he looks like art. It's maddening.
He clears his throat, finally finding his voice. "Can I... can I show you something?"
You narrow your eyes at him, confused. "What?"
He fidgets in his spot for a second before reaching into his pocket and pulling out his phone. After a moment of scrolling, he turns the screen toward you. It's a photo of a canvas—clearly a work in progress, layers of color bleeding into each other in abstract patterns.
"I've been trying to paint again," he says softly. "Ever since we broke up. But nothing's been working. The colors are wrong. Dead."
He flicks to the next picture. It's a similarly unfinished painting. "It gets easier to ignore how wrong they look after a few shots. Sometimes they move around like before. But it never lasts, because it's not you.”
The confession hangs in the air between the two of you. Unlike the heaviness of your earlier words, Hyunjin's float above you two like a balloon, hoisting the last of your irritation away with it. You see the truth of his words in the muddy browns and grays that dominate the canvas, so different from the vibrant explosions of his earlier work. It feels, painfully, like he's lost a piece of his soul.
You can't look at it anymore. You glance up at him instead.
He looks more nervous now than he did when you opened the door. It reminds you of your first ever date, and how he tried to hide his nerves with a devastating smile and charm. The memory chips at a hardened part of your heart.
You've missed him.
You've been so, so tired of missing him.
"Why did you come here,” you breathe. The question is softer this time. More genuine.
He puts his phone back in his pocket, gaze locked on you. Beneath the haze of whatever buzz he still has, you see a glimpse of your Hyunjin, the one who made you laugh so he could paint the bright yellow rays of sunshine that exploded in his vision. The one who left you sketches of your sleeping form if he had to leave before you woke up. 
The one who thought the smallest pieces of you were his magnum opus.
Perhaps that's why, when he takes a step closer, you don't move away this time.
"Because I'm selfish," he admits, his voice barely above a whisper. "Because I miss you. Because I need to see it again– to feel it. Even if it's the last time."
He takes another step, the height of him caging you against the wall. His eyes search yours, desperate and hungry. "Please, angel. I am begging you. Say my name. Let me see it again."
The request vibrates through you, from the tips of your ears down to your toes. It's maddening how easily he can awaken something you've tried so hard to bury.
You know this is dangerous territory—that giving in now could shatter you all over again.
But his proximity is intoxicating, the familiar scent of him filling your senses. Your body remembers what your mind wants to forget—the way he used to worship you, the way your voice could bring him to his knees in more ways than one.
"This doesn't fix anything," you whisper, even as you feel yourself weakening.
"I know," he breathes, close enough now that you can feel the heat radiating from his body, can smell the lingering alcohol on him. "But God, I miss you. I miss the way you light up my world."
Your back presses against the wall as he crowds into your space, not touching, but close enough that the air between you crackles with tension. He puts his hands on either side of your head, caging you in so that all you can look at is him. His eyes are dark, pupils blown wide with need and something deeper, more desperate.
"Say it, pretty girl."
You let his voice be the final push over the edge.
"Hyunjin," you breathe, and you watch as his entire body shudders in response.
His eyes flutter shut, plush lips parting slightly as a soft moan slips out. He's trembling now, hands twitching on the wall near your head as though still fighting the urge to touch you. "Again."
"Hyunjin," you repeat. Your voice is stronger now. Your heart is racing, stomach twisting with nerves and desire. It's been so long since you've said his name like this, and the effect it has on him is beyond intoxicating.
He whimpers, leaning in closer until his forehead rests against yours. "Fuck, I missed that," he murmurs. His breath is hot against your skin. You feel the brush of his low cut hair against your forehead. "I've never seen it like this before. Please, baby. Again. I need more."
The desperation in his voice makes you weak, and you find yourself sliding your hands up, up, up, until your fingers curl into his fuzz, tugging gently at the wisps of hair at the base of his skull. The reaction is immediate—Hyunjin grunts, low and guttural, his hips bucking forward against yours.
"Again," he pants. "Please. Please."
You drag your nails along his scalp, pulling another groan from deep within. You brush your noses together.
"My Hyunjin," you whisper, right against his lips.
He surges forward, crushing his mouth to yours in a hot, bruising kiss. You cling to him, fingers digging into his shoulders as he licks into your mouth. It's wet, messy, and desperate-- a clash of teeth and tongue that leaves you both breathless. You can't remember the last time anyone has kissed you this hard, this passionately—like he's trying to crawl inside you and never come back out.
He tastes like vodka and cheap beer, but underneath that is something that is so innately Hyunjin that you feel yourself melting, giving in to his touch and his mouth and his greedy hands. He shifts, slotting a thigh between your legs and flexing up into you. It pulls a moan from your throat that he swallows hungrily.
"Can I touch you?" He breathes his words right into your mouth.
You don’t hesitate. "Yes. Hyun, please."
His hands drop from the wall to the curve of your waist, sliding down until he has a bruising grip on your hips. His movements aren't as clumsy as you expect, but there's a hesitancy and nervousness that makes everything more enticing.
He uses his grip on your hips to grind you against his thigh. His movements are slow, deliberate. Your bodies are pressed flush together, his mouth still on yours, kissing you like you're the only thing keeping him on this plane of existence.
He bites down on your bottom lip and you whine his name right into his mouth. He hisses out a strangled sound before he breaks away, trailing hot kisses down your jaw, the column of your throat, and sucking a bruise into the soft, sensitive skin behind your ear. You're a mess of moans and whines and incoherent, half-finished sentences.
"God, you sound so fucking good," he murmurs into your neck. "Missed that too. Missed how pretty you sound for me.” He nips at your earlobe. “C'mon. Sing for me, angel."
He presses his thigh up into you more, the friction sending a jolt of electricity up your spine. You feel the length of him, hard heavy and hot, through his sweatpants. You dig your nails into his shoulders, a shuddering breath escaping you. 
"Oh. Fuck, Hyunjin."
His hips buck involuntarily, a grunt slipping from him. He kisses his way back to your mouth. "That's it, my love. That's it." 
"Hyunie." You're panting into his mouth now, words coming out in broken gasps. It's overwhelming, all the sensations– his hands, his mouth, his thigh. You try to hold back your next words, but the building pressure in your stomach disintegrates the barriers in your brain. They come pouring out before you can stop yourself. 
"I missed you so much.”
The confession seems to do something to him. He curses and ruts up against your leg, chasing the contact, the friction. You're both breathing heavily, the space between you nonexistent, moving with a practiced ease that's only born from being familiar with each other. He knows your body like he knows art, like it's a medium for him to mold and shape into whatever he wants.
"Wanna paint you," he huffs out when you moan again. He drags his teeth along the length of your throat. "Want you to see the colors you make for me."
“Tell me.” You drag your nails along the nape of his neck. “What does it look like?”
He moves his thigh up, the sharp movement making you gasp and drop your head onto his shoulder.
"That," he pants, "That one is white. Soft on the edges like feathers. It feels like cotton in my ears."
He sinks his teeth into your shoulder, his hips rutting against you with urgency. You can't help the moan that slips past your lips, and you swear his grip tightens, his breath hitching.
"Fuck," he breathes. "And that-- that one is hot. It's like rich red. Like the sun. It tastes sweet. Tastes like you.”
You whine into his neck, the combination of his words and the movement of his thigh making the heat coil tightly in your core. You're so close, right at the edge of your orgasm. You know you should stop-- that this is a dangerous line you're crossing-- but your body aches for him in a way it never will for anyone else.
"Come on. Cum for me, angel.” His voice is ragged, raw. "I wanna see it. Let me see it, please." 
And, well, you have never been able to deny him anything.
You tip over the edge, pleasure shooting through your body like a spark. Your orgasm hits you so hard that your vision goes white around the edges, a broken cry of his name spilling from your lips.
Hyunjin groans and ruts against you harder, faster. "Fuck, yes, that's it. Just like that, baby." 
He kisses you again, swallowing up every noise you make while he lets you grind your way through the aftershocks. His hands roam their way around your body, his nimble fingers slipping under your shirt to trace patterns on your skin.
You come down slowly, breathing hard into his mouth. When he's sure you've ridden out the last of your orgasm, he pulls back, eyes glassy and still a bit unfocused. His gaze is locked on yours as he slides his hands down your body, slipping a hand into the waistband of your shorts and moving to cup your ass in both hands.
Some of your wits return to you. You find the hairs at the nape of his neck again, dragging your nails against him gently. "Hyun," you breathe. "Hyun, you're drunk. We should stop."
"No," he whines. There's no aggression in his movements, just pure want. He tugs at your ass again, pressing his hips into yours. "Please, baby. I need to feel you."
He leans forward again, kissing down your jaw to your neck. The brush of his buzzcut against your face makes you shiver, but you don't pull away. Instead, you press a kiss to his temple, then another, and another, until you're kissing the shell of his ear.
"You'll change your mind in the morning," you murmur. The thought doesn't sting like you thought it would. It just seems like a fact. “Let's stop now.”
It takes some effort, but you manage to gently untangle yourself from him. You put a hand on his chest, not exactly pushing him but enough to signal a need for distance between you. He relents easily, stepping back and giving you space to breathe.
You take the opportunity to stare at him for a moment, taking in the sight of him: frazzled hair, blown-out pupils, kiss-swollen lips, and an erection straining painfully against his sweatpants. It's a sight that has your body singing for him all over again.
He looks lost. Desperate. Like you're the only thing keeping him together. Yesterday, you would balk at the thought of that, but now it makes your heart soften in your chest. You try to remember a time when you weren't weak for this man and come up short.
You sigh and reach out, resting your hand on his arm, thumb rubbing soothing circles into the skin. "Come on, Hyunie," you murmur. "You obviously can't go home. Let's get you to bed."
He follows you down the hallway to your bedroom like a lost puppy, fingers loosely tangled with yours. When you flick on the bedside lamp, the soft glow illuminates the space that used to be so familiar to him. He stands there, awkward, until you turn down the comforter and sit on the edge of the bed, patting the spot next to you.
"Do you want me to sleep here?" he asks, his voice small.
You nod. "I'll take the couch."
His hand tightens around yours immediately. "No." His voice is small, fragile. "Stay. Please."
You close your eyes, summoning strength from somewhere deep inside you. "Hyunjin, I don't think—"
"I won't touch you," he rushes to say, desperation creeping back into his tone. "I promise. I just... I can't be alone right now. Please don't make me be alone."
The plea strikes something painful in your chest. You've spent months trying to convince yourself that Hyunjin was fine without you—thriving, even. That he'd moved on to bigger, better things. But the man standing before you now, with bloodshot eyes and trembling hands, is far from fine. 
"Okay," you relent, because you're weak and tired and overwhelmed from the events of tonight. 
When he slides under the blanket, there's a safe distance between you. Not as vast as it's been the past six months, but a tangible space nonetheless. You lie there on your side, staring at him, wondering if this is what it feels like to drown. He stares back at you, and you watch the redness of his eyes dissipate, his body relaxing under the weight of your gaze. You can't even find it in you to be angry, but you try. You really do.
He looks at you with those glassy eyes and a soft smile. "You're so beautiful," he whispers.
You feel the anger slip through your fingers.
"You're drunk," you whisper back.
"I know."
You're not sure who moves first, but you find yourself closing the distance between you, your head tucked under his chin and your arm slung over his torso. He's warm and solid beneath you, and you find yourself melting into his embrace.
He wraps his arms around you, holding you close, and you can hear the steady beat of his heart in his chest. You close your eyes, focusing on the rhythm, letting it lull you to sleep.
"Goodnight, pretty girl," he murmurs.
You're asleep before you can respond.
—
Sunlight filters through your curtains, painting warm stripes across your face. You stir, your consciousness returning to you in fragmented pieces. The first thing you register is the coolness of the sheets next to you. The second is the ache in your chest.
You open your eyes, staring at the empty space where Hyunjin had been.
Had.
He's gone.
The pillow still bears the impression of his head, the ghost of his presence lingering in the sheets in the form of his expensive cologne. You reach out, rubbing a bit of the sheet between your fingers, finding it cold to the touch.
Of course he left. What were you expecting?
You're not sure how long you lie there, staring at the ceiling, but it's long enough for the tears to come. They slip down the sides of your face and into your hair, leaving wet stains on the pillow as everything from last night comes back to you: the desperation of his voice on the phone, the feeling of his body pressed against yours, his breath hot on your neck as he begged and pleaded for you to bathe his world in color again. It all felt real, so urgent in the midnight hour.
But morning has a wicked way of washing everything clean, the sober light revealing every mistake in detail.
You wish you could be angry. You wish you could feel anything other than the pain that's splitting your chest in two. You wish you could hate him.
You press the heels of your palms against your eyes in an attempt to stall the tears before they get worse. This is exactly why you should've blocked him, why you shouldn't have let him in or slept beside him like nothing changed between the two of you.
"Stupid," You murmur. "I'm so fucking stupid."
A familiar weight settles in your gut, the same one your carried for weeks when he first left-- a noxious mix of anger, embarrassment, and grief. You thought you'd finally shed it, but here it is again, through no fault but your own.
You drop your hands from your face and glance at the clock, which tells you it's a bit past 11am. He's back at his fancy apartment by now, already forgetting the things he whispered in your skin. You let out a humorless snort, imagining that he's painting, finally able to put colors together properly after using you for inspiration.
You're about to drag your pity party to the kitchen when you hear it-- the faint squeak of your bathroom sink turning on.
Your eyes snap in that direction instantly. For a moment, you don’t hear anything else. Then–
Splashing. Someone is washing their face.
He stayed.
You freeze, heart suddenly pounding against your chest. You can hear the water continuing to slosh around for a second, then it shuts off.
More silence, just for a second, then the unmistakable padding of feet on tile.
The en suite door swings open. Hyunjin materializes in the door frame wearing the same clothes from last night. His hair catches the morning light like a halo and his face is freshly washed. His eyes are no longer glassy, even though they're rimmed with the telltale shadows of a hangover. When he sees you sitting up in bed, he pauses, hovering in the doorway as though he's unsure if he's still allowed in.
The two of you hold eye contact for a moment. It feels like forever, but you know it can't be more than a second or two. It doesn't matter how long, really. It's still too long. Long enough to make the ache inside you bloom until your entire chest is suffocating under its weight. Long enough to realize how much you still want him and need to keep him in this space that was once yours and his. Long enough to want to reach out across time and space and mold his edges into something that belongs solely to you—that only you can recognize. Something different and yet exactly the same.
"Hi," he says.
The breath is knocked out of you all at once. 
"You're still here," you breathe. You feel a new wave of tears behind your eyes. You think it might be from relief.
Something flashes across his face quickly-- hurt, maybe, or understanding. "Yeah." His voice is soft. "I told you I wouldn't leave again."
Did he say that? You don't remember. You can't exactly think over the pounding of your heart in your ears. 
The words hang in the air anyway, a fragile bridge stretching across the space between you. It feels precarious, like one wrong move will send all of it crashing down. You scan his face for any hint of deception, for a flicker of the old Hyunjin that prioritized his rising fame over you. But all you find is a raw sincerity that mirrors the ache in your own chest.
He takes a hesitant step into the room, then another, like he's waiting for you to change your mind and kick him out. You don't. You just sit there, heart thrumming against your ribs, watching as he drifts closer until he's standing at edge of the bed. There's barely any space separating you two, yet everything still feels so far away.
"Last night," he starts. He clears his throat, fighting against the tremble in his voice and hands. "It was a mess. I was a mess, I know."
You wait, unable to tear your gaze away from him.
"But even in the middle of all of that... I need you to know I meant it. Every word, angel. I still do."
Something swells inside of you, the pain making way for something soft and tender. It's overwhelming, but the good kind. The kind that makes you feel light and free.
"Do you?" Your voice is so quiet, you're not sure if he hears you. But he does, because his gaze softens, eyes never leaving yours.
Hyunjin lowers himself to the ground, situating himself on his knees so the two of you are eye level. He reaches a hand out, his long, slender fingers making their way across the space, gently cupping the curve of your jaw. You close your eyes, holding your breath while you bask in the way his skin makes contact with yours. The air around you feels like it might come alive. As you lean into the warmth of his palm, the ache in your chest begins to fade bit by bit.
"Yeah. I do," he whispers. His voice is thick.
There are a million things you want to say, yet the only thing you can force out is: "Why?"
He brushes his thumb along the rise of your cheekbone, the gesture tender and familiar. It's almost like he never left, like no time has passed between the two of you. He opens his mouth to answer, then closes it, like the words are getting stuck in his throat.
"Can I show you?"
The question sends a shiver down your spine. You swallow and nod.
His eyes flicker down to your lips, the hunger evident in his gaze. He leans forward, pressing his forehead against yours and breathing you in. His breath tickles your nose, the scent of your toothpaste mixing with the smell of his sweater.
"Are you sure?" he whispers.
You answer him by closing the gap.
Unlike the kiss from last night, this one is slow, measured. You pour everything you've wanted to say since he left into it, and he returns it tenfold. He kisses you with a passion that threatens to consume, his grip on your face tightening ever so slightly, tongue sweeping out to lick at your bottom lip. You part for him immediately, the taste of him igniting the dormant fire inside you.
Hyunjin kisses you like a starving man. You give him everything he needs, letting him map your mouth with his tongue, moaning into the heat of his kiss. You feel it everywhere, the heat coiling low in your belly and spreading throughout your limbs. It feels like a revelation, and the way his grip tightens tells you that he feels it too.
"Say it, please baby," he breathes. The desperation from last night is creeping back in. His hand leaves your cheek, trailing down the length of your neck to your collarbone. He curls his hand into the neck of your shirt and tugs it down to expose your skin, dipping down to wash his tongue across your collarbones. You're already shaking before he even nips at your skin.
"Hyunjin," you moan. The sound makes him grunt against you, low and needy.
His mouth is on yours again, bruising, like he wants to drown in the taste of you. You sink your fingers into his hair, pulling gently and feeling his body shudder in response. He adjusts his positions on his knees, tugging you closer to him so your hips are flush against his chest. The heat of his feverish skin burns you through the thin fabric of your night clothes.
"Again, angel," he pleads, mouthing his way over your shirt, down to your breasts, hands trailing up your bare thighs and gripping hard. You let out a little whimper, head falling back as you thread your fingers in the wisps of his hair, holding on for dear life. He doesn't stop. The mixture of his mouth and his hands has your mind hazy and unfocused.
"Hyunjin. Hyun, please." You feel him shudder at that, his mouth kissing lower, lower, lower. When he reaches the hem of your shit, he grips it in his teeth and pulls it up, tongue darting out to run a stripe across your belly button. You pant and squirm, your hands gripping his shoulders tightly, nails digging into his skin through his sweatshirt.
He nips at your stomach and you cry out his name, the sound breaking through the space like a firecracker. Hyunjin's hips buck up against the bed as his mouth finds your hip bone, sinking his teeth into the tender skin. Your back arches, legs clamping around his torso. His grip is bruising and you really hope he leaves a mark, that there are traces of him on you long after you're finished. You want him to burn himself into your skin so you never forget this again.
He's pressing sloppy kisses over the skin he's just bitten, murmuring a mixture of words you can't decipher. The sound is muffled against your skin, but you don't miss the way he says "angel" over and over again, the way his lips form your name against your body like it's a prayer, and he is the sole saint who has come to worship at your altar.
He shifts his mouth back to the waistband of your shorts, his big, blown out eyes fluttering open to stare at you in question. The look you give him is all he needs to peel off the fabric, slowly, teasingly, tossing them away and letting his fingers trail the newly exposed skin. His touch is hot on your legs, trailing up and down until you're panting for him.
"So perfect for me, pretty girl," he praises, his lips ghosting over your hips. Your brain feels like mush, like his praise is the only thing that exists anymore. You watch his long, perfect fingers slide up the expanse of your thigh until he reaches your heat, pushing your lips apart to reveal your aching cunt to him. His touch is so featherlight that it has your hips bucking up, trying to get more.
"Be still, love." He presses a kiss to your clit. "Be still for me. Let me worship you, yeah? Can you do that?"
You whine, desperately  trying to remain still, to let him explore every inch of your body with his perfect hands, to let him touch and tease you like he needs to.
"That's it, baby," he breathes. His fingers run along the wetness of your cunt. "Look at you. So fucking wet for me, my angel."
He slips his middle finger in with ease, sliding all the way to his knuckle. You barely have a second to adjust to the feeling before he dives down, plump lips wrapping around your clit and sucking hard. It sends a jolt of pleasure up your spine so sharp, you can't help the half scream that falls from your lips, your hand shooting out to grab onto his head. He moans in response, letting you grind yourself up into his face. He laps at you like a man possessed, fingers curling deep inside you to press against that one spot he's found countless times before.
The room fills with the wet sounds of your cunt against his eager tongue. His hair is soft under your hand, a contrast to how hard he's fucking his fingers into you. They move with urgency and precision. Each thrust has you panting his name, and in response his moans vibrate through your cunt.
He moves his free hand to grab the one that's gripping his hair and squeezes, fingers curling between yours in a silent show of gratitude for letting him touch you, letting him drown himself in you.
The combination of his touch and the sounds he's making has your stomach coiling, tight like a spring, and your release comes quick and sharp. Your orgasm crashes into you like a wave, and you call out his name, louder than anything he's ever heard from you before, so loud your voice bounces off the walls. He works you through it, licking up all the wetness that's pouring from you, groaning and growling like a starving man. He slips in a third finger to fuck you through the last of your high and the stretch is so good, so perfect.
His grip on your hand is the only thing that keeps you grounded as the last of the pleasure courses through you, leaving you shaking and trembling against his face. Hyunjin keeps his eyes on you the entire time, watching you like a predator watches prey, pupils blown so wide only a sliver of dark brown peeks out at you. He only pulls away once you stop shuddering, dragging his fingers out of you with a loud, wet noise, slipping them straight into his mouth.
The sight of his plush, pink lips wrapped around those perfect fingers makes you whine and squirm with want, even though you've just been thoroughly fucked out. Hyunjin crawls his way back up your body and kisses you deeply. His lips are wet with you, and he fucks his tongue into your mouth so you can taste yourself. You find yourself gripping at the soft hairs on the back of his neck again in an attempt to press him closer. He pulls away slightly to trail sloppy, open mouthed kisses down your jaw, teeth dragging across the hot skin.
"You drive me crazy, pretty girl," he pants. He sucks a bruise into the junction where your throat meets your shoulder. "Every noise you make, it sizzles in my eyes like fire. I see you everywhere."
You drag your nails down his neck and he groans into you. You can feel the impossibly hard length of him pressing against your thigh through his sweatpants. He ruts against your body lazily, his movements sluggish. The post orgasm haze still hangs over your body like a heavy fog, slowing everything down to a sluggish, sensual pace. It's hypnotic and delicious, the feeling of his hardness dragging along your thigh while he peppers kisses along your skin. You know this dance, your bodies know the steps so well it feels like your back at the very beginning again, like no time has passed at all between the two of you.
"Let me have you, please." His voice is tight. His desperation is bleeding into everything, tinging the air between you like an intoxicating drug. It makes your head spin and your skin tingle. He shifts his position so his hips are rutting into yours now, slow, deliberate, and grinding right down into you. You're so wet for him still that there's no resistance in his movements. With your eyes fluttering from the sensation, you drag your fingers across the expanse of his broad shoulders and then down to the dip in his spine, trailing your fingertips up under his sweatshirt to drag across his hot skin. It pulls a shaky whine out of him.
"God, please angel." His cock throbs against you. "I'll make it good for you, so fucking good. Just please let me have you, please."
You tug at his sweater until he relents, breaking away to yank it up over his head, tossing it somewhere in the room. You take the opportunity to look at his chest, which is flushed with color and heaving with want. His lips are parted as he tries to catch his breath, lust-blown eyes staring down at you like you hold all of the secrets to his universe. He's still getting harder in his pants, the fabric stretching taut over his cock, the shape of his length visible beneath it. The sight alone makes you dizzy, and the wetness that has been slowly building inside you reaches a crescendo, your cunt pulsing at the sight before you.
Your hand drifts down between your legs. Your fingers slide easily over the wetness that's gathered there from the pleasure Hyunjin has been so dutifully dishing out to you, and you don't even think about what you're doing. Hyunjin watches, eyes glassy as you dip two fingers in the wet mess he's made of your cunt. You slide them back up to your clit and moan, hips twitching into your own touch. His lips part a fraction, a breathy gasp spilling from him. He looks so painfully hungry that the thought of denying him crosses your mind for the briefest of moments. The thought disappears the second he opens his mouth.
"Baby, please, I need it." He shifts on his knees, squirming and aching for you. You almost don't recognize his voice— it's so raspy and tight with need, words stumbling out of him with no hesitation, no thought. It makes your skin hot all over again. You circle your fingers around your clit as you watch him watch you, his chest heaving in tandem with the movements of your fingers. 
Then he makes the prettiest little whine you've ever heard in your entire life.
The sound alone is enough to make you remove your hand and offer your wet fingers to him, his mouth falling open obediently to welcome them in. He swirls his tongue around your fingertips, lapping up any of the wetness he's left on you. He groans and shudders, eyes fluttering shut as he sucks and licks and hums around your fingers. Your brain feels like static and your thighs squeeze together to try and ease the ache inside you.
"Fuck, Hyunjin," you moan out, watching him suck your fingers clean. You try desperately to focus on keeping your hips still, the friction from your bodies moving together making you want to chase your pleasure again.
He moans around your fingers before pulling back, catching the hand you had been using to play with your clit and pulling it up to place a gentle kiss on your palm. He keeps eye contact the entire time, looking at you from under those thick lashes and his hooded eyes. His lips part just enough for the tip of his tongue to lick at your skin, his fingers still wrapped tightly around your wrist. It makes your stomach drop. He has you under a spell and he doesn't even need to try.
He nips at your fingertips once more before speaking again, his voice low. "You make it so impossible to see anything other than you," he says, breathless. "Everywhere I turn, everything I see, there you are."
He shifts again, his body moving downwards and slotting itself between your thighs. He uses his free hand to wrestle himself out of his sweatpants and boxers, leaving them to hang low on his hips, cock finally free from their confines and bobbing heavily in the cool air. A shudder runs through him and you can tell it's both from the chill and the feeling of relief that comes from the sudden freedom. Your eyes linger on the head, leaking so prettily for you that it has your cunt squeezing around nothing again.
The hand holding your wrist pushes gently until it has you pinned above your head on the bed, the grip loose enough to not hurt you but strong enough to hold you in place. He reaches down to finally wrap his free hand around himself, stroking the length of his cock as he lets his eyes wander all over your body. His tongue darts out to wet his bottom lip, and you're transfixed by the way he lets it run along the swell of his mouth. He's such a pretty, pretty picture like this.
You think he might say something again, but the only sound that fills the space is his soft pants and moans. His strokes on himself once, the slick, wet noises making your brain go fuzzy all over again. Then he stops, leaning forward so he's hovering above you, the tip of his nose mere centimeters from yours. His lips brush against your mouth and his fingers twitch around your wrist, like he wants to let go but can't bear to.
You tilt your chin up to catch his lips, a soft whine bubbling in your throat. Want simmers under your skin so badly that you're a shaking, trembling mess under him. He coos at you in the kiss, and you feel him shift over you, lining himself up with your entrance. He rubs the head of his cock against your slit, gathering the wetness that has dripped out of your pulsing cunt and onto the sheets, using it as lubrication for the tip of his cock to catch on your entrance. Your hips twitch upwards involuntarily, making him break the kiss with a gasp, and you both look down to watch as pushes the head of his cock into you.
"Shit," he whines. It comes out like a hiss, his eyes slipping closed. The feeling of your body welcoming him home has a shudder running up his spine. He releases your hand and uses his elbows to hold himself up over you, fingers burying themselves in the sheets surrounding your head. The tips of his ears are dusted pink, and his mouth is slack as he lets himself be enveloped by the heat of your body. He rests his head in the crook of your neck.
He feels impossibly large inside of you. It has been so long since you've had him this close, it's almost like you forgot how good he can fill you. He shifts and pushes himself a bit further in and you can't help the whimper that tumbles from your mouth. The stretch is so deliciously good that your hips twitch again, body instinctively trying to grind itself onto his length to get him right where you need him. He curses above you again and his grip in the sheets tighten as he nips at your throat.
"Angel," he chokes out. His breath feels boiling hot against your skin. "Please don't move. Not yet, baby. You feel too fucking good."
His voice is strained, tight in his chest like he's barely holding himself back from pounding into you like his body so obviously wants to. The feeling of being stretched by him has you quivering, cunt pulsing around the intrusion. It feels like it takes him forever, but he finally manages to fully slide into you, letting his hips press against yours so you can take the time to adjust to the fullness. His name is a mantra on your lips, the only coherent word your brain is able to conjure right now. He kisses your neck to calm you down, nuzzles his nose against you, licks at the tender skin that has a pulse beating rapidly underneath it.
"So tight, angel," he grunts. His teeth dig into the skin of your neck, sucking another bruise into your skin. "So fucking tight for me."
Your nails are digging into his back now, scratching angry red lines down his shoulder blades as you struggle to breathe beneath him. It feels so good, the way his weight pushes into you and lets you feel every twitch and pulse of his body, lets you feel him shake and quiver. He slides back a bit before pushing into you again, his entire body shaking with the effort it's taking for him to maintain this languid pace. His forehead is pressed against your skin still and his breath comes out hot and shaky as he fucks himself into you again and again, slow and shallow.
The drag of his cock has your toes curling. Your hands slide from his back to his shoulder, down to his biceps, fingers digging into the skin to leave crescents that you can't bring yourself to feel bad about. The heat is pooling in your stomach again, making the feeling in your toes and fingertips start to fizzle away. All that's left is you and Hyunjin. The artist and his muse.
"Hyunie," you breathe. "Hyun."
"I know baby," he grunts. You can feel the drag of his lips on you, leaving kisses against your feverishly hot skin. "I know. I'm here, I'm here."
He picks up the pace then, hips snapping against you to get his cock as deep as it'll go. Your brain has become static, aware of nothing more than the sound of skin slapping against skin, of the wet noises coming from where Hyunjin has returned to his home inside you. You arch your body into his hold and he slips his hand into the curve of your back, pressing you close so that every thrust brings him as close to your heart as he can get.
When he pounds into you particularly hard and you flutter around him, he grunts, sitting up and on his heels to gain leverage to piston into you deep. 
"So fucking perfect," he groans. He reaches down to thumb at your clit, circling it and grinding it down in time with his thrusts. You whine his name and buck against his hand as his thrusts get harder and faster in response. It has the coil in your belly winding tighter, so tight your body feels rigid against the bed. "Gonna show me that rainbow, right baby? Be good and come for me, yeah?"
You're already nodding frantically, words completely failing you. The sound of your skin meeting is loud, and your own moans are a chorus that's getting lost in his groans, in his pretty little whimpers of your name. It's all too much— you can barely catch your breath.
His hand that isn't playing with your clit finds one of yours and brings it to your stomach, pushing your palm into the skin below your belly button. When you feel it—the subtle bump from the tip of his cock, pressing against his fingers and into the flat of your stomach—you moan and dig your nails into the back of his hand.
"Fuck," he grits. "You like that angel? You like feeling full of me?"
A distant pulsing of your clit is the only warning you get before your orgasm hits you hard. You scream Hyunjin's name, nails digging into his skin for something to tether to. Your orgasm washes over you like an electric current, shooting up your spine and down to your toes. It whites your vision out, each pulse of Hyunjin's thrust translating into faded bursts of colors behind your eyes. The force of it makes your cunt squeeze down hard, so hard that you feel him stutter in his rhythm above you. You feel him drop forward to grip onto the pillow behind your head and bury his face into your chest, fingers digging in tight, hips bucking up into you. His eyes are squeezed shut and he's biting hard down on the fabric of your shirt, his breath coming in short, sharp bursts. You don't need to look to know he's coming inside of you, filling you up and painting you white.
It feels like the two of you ride through the aftershocks for years before he comes back down enough to gently slip his cock out of you, hissing from the sensitivity. You barely even feel him roll off of you, the world still tilted on it's axis significantly. Your vision takes a second to focus as your chest heaves. It takes even longer to realize that Hyunjin is staring at you from where he's lying on his side, head propped up on his elbow and an expression on his face you haven't seen in months. The thought that he could still look at you with a mixture of reverence and wonder after all this time is overwhelming.
But exhaustion is the prevailing emotion, and you only manage a small, sleepy smile before you pass out, lulled to sleep by the soft kiss he presses to your shoulder.
—
When you wake up a few hours later, you’re not panicked to find that you’re by yourself. The sheets are still warm, the shower is running, and there is still a dull, pleasant ache between your legs. You stretch, muscles nicely liquid and pliant, before patting around for your phone on your nightstand.
You do not find your phone. You find, instead, a piece of paper.
It takes a moment of sleepy shuffling, but once you get the lamp on, you see that it’s a pencil sketch of your sleeping form. There’s a cloud of colors surrounding you, beautifully rich blues and pinks that overlap to create equally vibrant purples. The colors feather out around the paper, swirling into soft, delicate hearts.
There is a single word on the bottom of the drawing:
Reconciliation.
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delulumel ¡ 2 months ago
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Still yours
Pairing: exbf!bangchan x f!reader
Genre: ex’s to lovers, a little bit of angst, fluff at the end, possesive!chan
Synopsis: they say time heals wounds but two years later, he still looks at you like you are his. The problem is…you never stopped being his.
Word count: 3.0k
Warnings: cursing
Note: I’ve read so many stories here so I thought I might give this a try. I’m kinda nervous but hope you like it!
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Your breakup with Chan wasn’t dramatic. No screaming, no breaking things—just the quiet realisation that you two won’t work out. The distance between you has stretched too far, the missed calls and unanswered messages for days.
But the last thing you didn’t expect from him was forgetting your birthday.
He didn’t forgot—no, he called you saying he will be working late and not to wait for him. While you stand there wearing your cute dress expecting him to surprise you.
When he showed at your shared apartment he knew immediately. He remembered it last minute and ran to you, but it was already late. The colour of his face drained when he saw the bag full of your belongings.
“We can’t do this anymore.” you said, your voice steadier than you felt.
Chris didn’t argue—he couldn’t, it was his fault. He just stood there and accepted it.
You thought that would be the end of it.
But you were wrong.
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You tried to move on
You deleted his number, threw away things that reminded you of him, you started to date other people—most of them were horrible.
Chan though didn’t move on.
He didn’t blow up your phone or something. Instead, he lingered.
“@gnabnahc liked your post” at 2 AM
He commented at old posts “I remember that day.”
And then your friends brought him up.
“Chan asked about you yesterday.” your friend mentioned.
You stiffened “what did he say?”
“He just wanted to know if you are seeing anyone.”
“Why?”
“You know how he is. He doesn’t like sharing you.”
You rolled your eyes. “he didn’t seem to mind sharing his time with everyone but me when we were together.”
Later that night you had a dream about him. Of course he would creep back into your mind after some while.
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You shouldn’t have gone to the party.
But your friends begged you just so you can clear your mind.
The moment you walked in, he was there.
Leaning against the balcony railing, drink in hand, laughing at something Hyunjin said to him. His hair was a little longer, his black button-up rolled up to his elbows— he looked really good.
You turned to leave.
“Y/n” a familiar voice called you.
When you turned back Chan was already walking to you, his gaze dark.
“You are here.” He said in a deep voice.
“Yeah, suprise.” you said while forcing a smile.
His eyes devouring your figure like he wanted to memorize the image. “You look good.”
“Thanks.” you took a step back “You look good too.”
His jaw clenched “You’ve been avoiding me.”
“No” You lied “Just busy.”
“Bullshit” He stepped closer “You blocked my number.”
“Well that’s how breakup works Chan.”
Then—thank god—Hyunjin slided an arm around his shoulders, grinning “Stop scaring the guests man.”
He didn’t smile. He continued to stare at you.
You on the other hand tried to escape to the kitchen.
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He followed you.
Of course he did.
The second you stepped inside, you whirled around “What the hell Chan?”
He pinned you against the kitchen counter, his body way to close, the cologne he always wore filling your lungs. “You blocked me” he repeated.
“I had to” Your body trying to escape but the marble counter was stopping you. “You kept—”
“Kept what? Caring?” His warm breath warming your face. “You think I could just stop?”
“You didn’t care enough when you needed to.” you shot back.
Chan let out a harsh laugh. “That’s what you think? That I didn’t care? I cared too fucking much. That’s why I worked so hard trying to built something—”
“For who?” You interrupted. “Because it sure hell wasn’t for us”
The words hung between you. Chan’s expression twisted, something vulnerable flashing across his face.
“You’re right, I fucked up.” His hand hovered near your face before it dropped to his side. “But don’t stand here telling me you didn’t know what you got yourself into. You knew who I was—what my life was like.”
“I knew the man who promised me I’d always come first.” Your voice breaking “Not the man who ignored me for weeks.”
Chan’s composure cracked. “I was trying to built a future for us!”
“Without me in it!” Tears blurred your vision. “You made all the plans, all the decisions but you never asked what I wanted!”
“I just wanted you.” You whispered. “Not your success. Not your sacrifices. Just you.”
Chan’s breath hitched. For a long moment he just stared at you, his eyes tracing every feature like he was memorising you. Finally he brought his hand up to cradle your cheek.
“Well I’m here now” he murmured, thumb brushing away a tear that had slipped from your eyes. “All of me. Let me make it up to you.”
You searched his face—the sincerity in his eyes, the tension in his shoulders, the way his fingers trembled slightly against your skin. Two years of anger and loneliness warred with the part of you that never stopped loving him.
Chan held perfectly still, letting you look your fill, letting you decide. The music from inside faded into background noise.
When you finally leaned in, his sharp intake of breath was the last thing you heard before his lips met yours.
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A/N: omg I’m sweating, this is not for the easy lol. If you see any mistakes please let me know!❤️
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