desi-idealist

[desi-idealist]

[desi-idealist]

In case it's your birthday today and no one's wished you yet,

I'm glad you're here. Happy birthday.

[desi-idealist]

Get over the fear of being seen.

Stop caring about how you’re gonna be perceived. Stop doubting yourself. Stop aiming to be perfect. Stop ruminating.

Accept who you are. Hype yourself. Invest in yourself. Be audacious. Trust in the greater outcome. Allow yourself to be seen as you are.

[desi-idealist]

btw dating sucks as a concept.

[desi-idealist]

i dont see why i cant start a trend, so here goes. lets try to build back our attention spans. lets try to focus on just one thing for as long as possible. lets not watch those "asmr for people with adhd" videos where they fuck up adhd folks even worse. lets resist the urge to reach for our phones when watching a movie. lets read the articles we reblog, even when theyre boring. i know its hard, i have adhd too, but its worth it. i also know that this hard work doesnt always seem super impressive to other people, so id love for yall to tell me in the tags or replies if youve done something, no matter how small, for your attention span. you deserve to feel like youve taken back some of what social media has ripped from you

[desi-idealist]

[desi-idealist]

Life really does align in weird ways.

My bully from 5th grade who snapped my glasses in front of his friends just found me on social media a few weeks ago.

He wrote me a long apology saying how he was now a father to a 3 year old little girl and was taking her to get her first pair of little glasses in the next few days—and it brought back what he did. He said couldn’t ever handle the idea of someone doing that to her.

My first instinct was to tell him to get lost, but I realized I was getting what I always prayed for. I just wanted the people who were mean to me to eventually understand it—even if it took a personal experience to relate to and 14 years to open their eyes.

A piece of me healed in that moment as I gave him glasses advice for his daughter because I was the same age when I got my first pair.

Kids are really ruthless, but it takes a healed adult to reach out to apologize. And there is always time to change; it’s never too late.

[desi-idealist]

Common Frank Bidart banger (from "In the Ruins," in Half-Light: Collected Poems 1965-2016)

[desi-idealist]

Is there any part of life that is better shared with strangers rather than with close friends or family members?

It depends on the relationship you have with your friends and family. Also, if this part is something you cherish the most and are afraid of judgements. We can’t get along with everyone in our lives. No matter how close we are to them there's always going to be times when our interests and ideals don't match. In such moments, people we are familiar with don’t meet our needs and expecting them to will lead to disappointments. And we find company and understanding in strangers better than friends or family. Like meeting someone who gets your geekiness or running into a fellow sports fan. Of course, these are trivial examples. But the point is if the part of life is something close to the core of your identity and your loved ones don’t understand it, it can be heartbreaking. Sometimes they won’t appreciate that part of you because of their own shortcomings or it contradicts with the image they already have of you. In those moments, a random stranger offers more compassion than you’re hoping for.

In short, the answer lies with you. You are the only one who can decide the answer for this.

[desi-idealist]

Why do bad and evil people never suffer in life?

It depends on what your definition of suffering is. ‘Bad’ people suffer. But not in the way ‘good’ people do. Say, for a narcissist, their suffering is losing control of their victim but the same scenario is a blessing to the victim. Also, evil seeks out evil only when it serves them. Bad people can’t control the outcome and narrative surrounded by similarly motivated people. They will actively choose to be around the ones who can serve their purpose, aka good people who can feed their ego, their emotional needs, whom they can exploit or manipulate. For them the suffering is more in terms of loss of this and not a moral punishment that good people tend to consider karma. For them, their actions are completely rational and it’s the only way of life. They are incapable of perceiving these acts as wrong. So even if they suffer on your terms, they have been wronged by the society or the universe itself, and it’s not a consequence of their actions.

[desi-idealist]

Will someone help me learn to be alive? I am looking through mirrors of futures past and present, eating visions and throwing up innards. I hear whispers of people gone and living and they do not speak on how to live but mostly how to die. I have seen other mothers speak on how to fold shirts into fours and make your bed. You ask them how to live but she is folding into herself and out again. I’ve had a father, I think, and yet he is cracking, always cracking, under an unseen weight of leaving and being left. “How did you learn to live?” I have asked, desperate and forced. The living and the dead and the living do not die and I’ve had grandparents who shake their heads, unsmiling and gray. Six feet under and haunting in my handshakes, heartaches, vowel sounds. They ask me how you live.