desifleabag - Tumblr blog

[desifleabag]

Maine aaj chudiya khareedi. Paseenda Mard nahi hai to to kya huya!?!

[desifleabag]

Ada Limón, from "To the Busted Among Us", Sharks in the Rivers

[desifleabag]

i PERSONALLY would like to FALL IN LOVE please!!!!!! and have the SAME PERSON fall in love with me BACK!!!!!!! could i get some MUTUAL AFFECTION out here!!!!!!!!!

[desifleabag]

You have options. I promise you, you have options. Even if you blow up your whole life, change your name and train hop half way across the country- you still have options. So long as you are alive you have choices and chances. If you can’t see them, ask someone else. Ask a stranger or someone who loves you. Anyone not in your situation will have different a perspective. Stay safe and stay alive.

[desifleabag]

I am a hypocrite

I share stories and poems of love with people I will never meet,

Yet I find it difficult to stand beside the bride and groom, watching them get married

With a face of utter disappointment and hate.

Why did she get married? Why does she want to have kids?

I love families who genuinely take care of each other,

So I tell her mother, "I am jealous you have such a sweet family."

My friend smacks me and reminds me, over tea, how I speak of not wanting a family.

I love roses, and it's the only metaphor of love I contemplate to write.

I bought roses from the street and threw them away,

Maybe because I am distant with the idea of love,

Or because I have deprived myself of love every single time it knocked on my door.

I tell my friends I want to sleep alone.

When I do, I find my teddy bear hugging me,

While my friends watch "Friends," Ross hugging Rachel.

My tears dry, and no one removes my specs or puts a blanket on me.

Oh yes, I locked the door, just like I locked my heart.

I hate my parents, not because of the way they treat me, but the choices they made in their life.

I don't save the last scoop of ice cream for my mother,

I don't call my dad to come for dinner.

Yet, I clean the kitchen and wait for my dad while reading a book.

I told the universe that I hate him,

I will never love him.

Yet, I choose to keep his contact in my phone,

Text him every last week of the month.

I didn't stop cutting cake on his birthday,

Though he lives in the same continent and hates celebrating birthdays.

I whisper, "This is the last time," but I behave as if it's my first time embracing him.

I keep shouting at my sister, calling her a trash bag.

But while buying a flower for myself,

I will buy one more flower for her.

If I buy a T-shirt for myself,

I will purchase a bigger size so we both can wear it.

I keep complaining about the relationship I have with winter.

But when it arrives, I buy myself a cardigan,

Make hot chocolate, have tea, and do bonfires,

With a stack of medicines.

Yes, I am over my friendship breakup.

I hated them with my heart, mind, and soul.

It's been months and months,

But I still keep them in my prayers and wonder how they are doing.

Do they think about me? Oh! Forget it, they don't!

The hypocrite in me and the lover in me,

For the things I hate and love at the same time.

I will never understand or articulate.

I am not yellow, but I am grey.

[desifleabag]

when someone asks you to write a biography of your life

[desifleabag]

My Chemical Romance is magic ✨

[desifleabag]

[desifleabag]

my problem is that I give too many fucks!!! nonchalant people I want to be like you

[desifleabag]

there should be a manual on how to exist. something to make one feel they're not continuously being slipped. instructions about all the emotions and their repercussions. the methods of processing grief and knowledge about celebrating peace. denial should not be skipped and oh god someone please talk about the thin line between love and hatred. the uncertainties of teenage and overwhelming responsibilities thrown on young shoulders after entering your twenties. it gets better in your thirties. what about the woman who's juggling motherhood with a degree or her husband who finds no delight in working for a corporate team? so much left still unknown about the entirety of human beings.

[desifleabag]

if anyone finds out when this permanent feeling of fear goes away please let me know

[desifleabag]

sweet tea & a spoon

[desifleabag]

Thankyou sweetheart! Have a beautiful day like you✨️🌸🌻

[desifleabag]

Desiblr people are separated by cities and united by dukh dard peeda kasht

[desifleabag]

they should invent a man who knows what he’s sorry for

[desifleabag]

- j (x), kintsugi