designatednee-san - Tumblr blog

[designatednee-san]

I just received a demisexual flag from Amazon, but I never ordered it? It was addressed to me with my exact address? And I am demisexual, but still?

[designatednee-san]

I am bisexual 

I have sex twice a year

[designatednee-san]

I know it’s a late response, but try “By The Grace of The Gods” and “The Saint’s Magic Power is Omnipotent”. I guarantee you they are 1,000% not yikes.

My current absolute need right now is to be isekai’d into an epic adventure of badassery, or to take a nap. Or maybe take a nap and wake up to find that I have been isekai’d into an epic adventure of badassery.

[designatednee-san]

Thought I heard someone say “Hello” in Arabic

But it was a false Salaam

[designatednee-san]

My wife found out I was cheating after she found the letters I was hiding

She got mad and said she is never playing Scrabble with me again!

[designatednee-san]

I failed my calculus exam because I was sitting in between two identical twins.

It was impossible..to differentiate between them.

[designatednee-san]

Little Johnny was doing his maths homework

He says out loud, “One plus six, that son of a bitch is seven. Four plus four, that son of a bitch is eight.”

His mum overhears this and is shocked! she says to him, “What are you doing Johnny?”

Johnny replies, “I am just doing my maths homework.”

“And is this is how your teacher taught you to do it?” the mother asks.

“Yes,” Johnny replies.

The mother is now angry and immediately phones Johnny’s teacher, “What on earth are you teaching my son in class?” she asks.

The teacher replies, “Right now, we are learning mathematical addition.”

The mother asks, “And are you teaching them to say one plus six, that son of a bitch is seven?”

After the teacher stopped laughing hysterically, she answers, “What I taught them to say was, one plus six, the sum of which is seven.”

[designatednee-san]

God: “Adam, I’ll let you name the birds”

Adam: “Tit”

God: “Uhh ok”

Adam: “Boobie”

God: “Stop naming them after breasts”

Adam: Looks at rooster

[designatednee-san]

11:38 - Arrived at crime scene.

11:38 - Examined body. Signs of a struggle.

11:38 - Found murder weapon in drain.

11:38 - Realised watch was broken.

[designatednee-san]

I really can’t believe I’ve been on this hell site for 8 years

[designatednee-san]

We all know of the ‘gifted kid that got burnout and has ADHD’, but was anyone else that ‘did pretty great in gym class despite not playing any sports and fairly clumsy anywhere else bc they ADHD’ kid?

[designatednee-san]

[designatednee-san]

the daddy daughter day comic makes me so happy, just the way that ash was so bummed about not getting to battle with his lesbian dad and jessie pulling out the old team rocket tricks, it's so wholesome. anyway, ash and jessie are like this to me

This is perfect

[designatednee-san]

Character idea: kidnapped princess being forced to marry her captor that can’t escape successfully on her own. So while she waits for help to arrive, she finds a way to take all of the fancy jewelry, dresses, shoes, and lingerie being gifted to her in an attempt to make her fall for the villain. (Would she ever marry this creep? Not on her life! But a gift is a gift, and damn, these are some nice gifts.) She even manages to steal some nice loot for her rescuer(s) as thanks.

I think the story she’d be in would start with the rescue operation, then follow her and the hero falling in love naturally over time.

[designatednee-san]

Consuming media? No, you must have misheard me. I said consumption media. As in media that causes pulmonary tuberculosis.

[designatednee-san]

[designatednee-san]

Just lost one follower. what does this mean for my dynasty.