designdoll

[designdoll]

Girl breakfast.

[designdoll]

i'm sorry if this is an uncomfortable question but are you okay with trans men looking at your blog? i think you're really hot, but i want to make sure i don't cross any boundaries

I am posting stuff online with the full consent and understanding anyone can see it. If you're enjoying my insane journals of a very fucked up and slutty life then please look as much as you want. Man or woman, trans or cis, everyone is welcome. Except for minors. They go in the stew.

[designdoll]

Was crossing state lines with @emfrots the other night as part of drifting (currently semi-homeless) and got invited to tag along to a nightclub. I was pinned to a light post and surrounded before I even got inside which really should have been a flag for how the night was going to go.

Very first drink bought for me was spiked, and while I was crossfaded she fished the custom-fitted collar I'd been given (see pic) out of my pocket and leashed me there in public.

I was kinda sandwiched between two of the girls crowding me for a while? One had me on the floor between her legs and was holding my arms behind my head, the other was making out with her over me and fucking my head against the cushioned seating booth. I'd say I was kneeling but in retrospect I was more of just a crumpled pile on the floor. Only thing hiding me from at least a hundred people was the girl on top fucking my throat so hard it broke the rivets on my collar.

Got told afterwards I attracted a small crowd. I admit not only was I totally blitzed but was too face-up in dick to really see what was going on but I do vaguely recall hearing one guy asking if he could watch (and if he could have a turn with me.)

[designdoll]

Trying to figure out how to put on panties because I even boymode my underwear and managed to somehow fit my whole-ass twink body through a leg hole.

[designdoll]

Insane feeling being over at someone's house, standing around doing FA when without warning or word you're approached and a tape measure wrapped around your neck. "14 inches" like it's the most casual thing in the world.

[designdoll]

Happy pride month.

[designdoll]

Guy at the firing range triple-checked my card because I "look 12."

The world of adults is actively rejecting me and it's not even in a ableist way.

[designdoll]

oh my god stop tagging this "floret"

You're over at her house. The best sanctuary you've got right now. Housing with your family's been pretty miserable. But she cares lots, insists on taking care of every need possible need. She makes sure you're hydrated, comfortable, happy, that you're not ignoring your sensory issues, even helps get you food. You'd just had dinner together, out in public. Through your dysphoria you ate rather light.

You're in the shower right now. She insisted on following you in, towering tall over you and asking if she could handle washing you. It's demeaning, but frankly with how bad your body feels it's kind of a blessing. Her hands are electric on your skin. She tells you to lean your head back to keep the soap out of your eyes as she runs shampoo on her fingers through your hair. Something's off about this scene, your brain's fuzzy though you've barely realized it yet. Not enough to be an issue but enough that when you try to react or complain the words come out half-formed and clumsy. Timid whining where should otherwise be assertive refusal.

You step out first. Wrap yourself in a standard size towel that's a bit too big for you. When you open the door to the hallway your stomach drops. The hallway is uncanny, alien in that way all places were when you were very young. You're caught there like a frozen computer application, processing the unprovable mysticism in a banal view. You feel so small.

You're in the bedroom now. Your head's on straight enough you recall walking here from the bathroom; that's not always a given. You crash landed on the pile of soft blankets and stuffed animals she left out specifically for you. Staring at your phone without actually processing the videos, indulging yourself in the sensory hotsprings of swirling colors and words without meaning. You don't absorb a thing, it just washes over you.

When she comes in you finally admit you feel a bit strange. Her smile's so warm when she tells you "That would be because I drugged you. I spiked your drink at dinner." You're not sure when she even had the chance. Even if you hadn't been looking surely someone else would have noticed, would have said something. You hadn't even tasted anything off. "I thought I had used plenty, but clearly you need more next time." Sprawled out on the bedspread you realize you're prey. Your brain's reeling from a chemical punch you never noticed was thrown but you're husky enough you're only dazed when you're supposed to be on the floor.

She pulls your head into her lap and starts stroking it like a pet, cooing and giggling. In your stupor your body wants to do nothing but melt into her arms. You hug a plushie for dear life when she pushes a needle through your skin, refueling your supply of hormones to give you another week of life. You keep clinging to it when she begins to read you a bed-time story, each word so powerful against your slurred grey matter it feels real. You don't realize what's happening when you finally fall asleep.

[designdoll]

Biting you until your porcelain cracks <3

Bite harder.

[designdoll]

You're over at her house. The best sanctuary you've got right now. Housing with your family's been pretty miserable. But she cares lots, insists on taking care of every need possible need. She makes sure you're hydrated, comfortable, happy, that you're not ignoring your sensory issues, even helps get you food. You'd just had dinner together, out in public. Through your dysphoria you ate rather light.

You're in the shower right now. She insisted on following you in, towering tall over you and asking if she could handle washing you. It's demeaning, but frankly with how bad your body feels it's kind of a blessing. Her hands are electric on your skin. She tells you to lean your head back to keep the soap out of your eyes as she runs shampoo on her fingers through your hair. Something's off about this scene, your brain's fuzzy though you've barely realized it yet. Not enough to be an issue but enough that when you try to react or complain the words come out half-formed and clumsy. Timid whining where should otherwise be assertive refusal.

You step out first. Wrap yourself in a standard size towel that's a bit too big for you. When you open the door to the hallway your stomach drops. The hallway is uncanny, alien in that way all places were when you were very young. You're caught there like a frozen computer application, processing the unprovable mysticism in a banal view. You feel so small.

You're in the bedroom now. Your head's on straight enough you recall walking here from the bathroom; that's not always a given. You crash landed on the pile of soft blankets and stuffed animals she left out specifically for you. Staring at your phone without actually processing the videos, indulging yourself in the sensory hotsprings of swirling colors and words without meaning. You don't absorb a thing, it just washes over you.

When she comes in you finally admit you feel a bit strange. Her smile's so warm when she tells you "That would be because I drugged you. I spiked your drink at dinner." You're not sure when she even had the chance. Even if you hadn't been looking surely someone else would have noticed, would have said something. You hadn't even tasted anything off. "I thought I had used plenty, but clearly you need more next time." Sprawled out on the bedspread you realize you're prey. Your brain's reeling from a chemical punch you never noticed was thrown but you're husky enough you're only dazed when you're supposed to be on the floor.

She pulls your head into her lap and starts stroking it like a pet, cooing and giggling. In your stupor your body wants to do nothing but melt into her arms. You hug a plushie for dear life when she pushes a needle through your skin, refueling your supply of hormones to give you another week of life. You keep clinging to it when she begins to read you a bed-time story, each word so powerful against your slurred grey matter it feels real. You don't realize what's happening when you finally fall asleep.

[designdoll]

That's actually seriously upsetting, fuck this hellsite tbh.

damn it happened..couldve sworn i followed GLaDOS' backup on here already but cant find it can someone send me the username

[designdoll]

I mentioned the whole "mom" situation too and she latched onto that shit so hard. Being asked "Why doesn't your Affini have a collar for you yet?" On a first date while getting threatened with a crop is fic shit. My life is so cooked.

Missed the anarchist food drive bc my date was up all night beating me and she ignored her morning alarm in favor of rolling over and cuddling me like a stuffed animal.

The newfound free time we had was, of course, used for more torture.

[designdoll]

Missed the anarchist food drive bc my date was up all night beating me and she ignored her morning alarm in favor of rolling over and cuddling me like a stuffed animal.

The newfound free time we had was, of course, used for more torture.

[designdoll]

Haha funny you should say that actually

It is my supreme belief that if I look pathetic and sad enough, a hot tgirl will take pity on me, scoop me up in her arms, and take her to her house where I will be wrapped in a blanket and given hot chocolate

[designdoll]

my yarn? balled

my treats? baggied

my chin? scritchied

my collar? jingling

my stretchies? biiiiiiig

my paws? bap bapping

my teefs? chomping

your feudal lord wishes he was me

[designdoll]

I shared this around and people seemed to really enjoy it, so for everyone to enjoy; here's a relatively light crack from a morning warm-up a few days ago.

[designdoll]

Bubblegumgothglados reblog oh my god?

First post after being a long time lurker. Heavily inspired by @designdoll, even though I'm not nearly as pretty >.<

Spent all day today dollifying all my joints. Not sure how best to show them off though, suggestions (and teasing) encouraged :3