diabolichare - Tumblr blog

[diabolichare]

Dan who, for some reason, ended up in the DC universe after having his timeline erased and bolting so he could then return to fuck shit up for his past (is it even his past self anymore, after having his timeline erased? Is he still Danny?) self: I'm going to destroy everything.

Martha and Jonathan Kent: Simply exists and shows him kindness.

Dan:

Dan a moment later: You know what? I can hold off on that for a while.

***

Martha and Jonathan Kent: We really want a child.

Clockwork, who really shouldn't be looking at this timeline and sticking to his own and stop being such a nosy bitch: I can help with that!

Martha and Jonathan Kent looking at this gigantic, walking tank of a man who looks like he needs help: Is kind to him

Martha and Jonathan Kent literally a week later: So we accidentally adopted an adult but I don't think he knows that yet.

***

Dan a good few years later, hasn't aged a day but nobody really talks about it, currently sipping some milk minding his own business:

A crash echoed as the Kent's go and check it out. Dan is debating if he should sit still or bolt out of the door too.

Martha and Jonathan: So, how do you feel about a new sibling?

Dan: I don't have any siblings.

The Kents, holding up a baby Clark: Well you do now!

Later Dan cries after finally realizing that he's been adopted despite living with these people for years.

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Zuko having a connection to the spirit world but instead of it being something deep and profound, it’s just because he spent three years pre-finding the avatar running towards the first weird magical shit he saw.

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Currently obsessed with the idea of post-Jason Batfam finding the Discowing suit, and just loosing their shit imagining Dick trying to fight crime in it- Jason included, since he wasn't alive during it's air time.

For whatever reason they're able to convince Dick to go out in patrol in it, grinning at each other thinking how funny it's gonna be because there's no way they're gonna take him seriously in that monstrosity, much less be afraid of him.

(Bruce and Barbara watch this occur with amusement, being the only ones who remember Dick's absolutely unhinged behavior in it given Jason's death)

Cue all the street thugs and villains who remember Dick's discowing era just dropping their shit and running for their lives at the sight of him, screaming their heads off. He catches one of them, and he starts shaking and crying, saying how he didn't mean it and he'll turn himself in, and all the batkids just watch in utter shock as Dick whispers a few things to the guy, scaring him so badly he pisses himself. Dick just laugs at that, and tells the guy to go on and head to the station to confess, which the man does with complete obedience.

They have no idea what just happened. Do they want to know? Should they know? Is it even safe to know?

Later on Tim, who has faint memories of it but still can't fathom why they're so afraid, will grow to curious to keep himself away and looks up the records pertaining to that time period, sweating profusely as he reads abt the state in which he left some criminals, wondering why the hell he ever thought Dick was the best at handling his emotions.

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boothill in a teacup! (ignore sunday)

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For those Titan's Tower AUs where Tim is all like, "That's Jason, so I'll let him torture/kill me when he pops by," what if Red Hood walks in on Robin being extra prepared. Tim greets him at the door with a smile, beckons him on over, and shows him the table of torture devices he gathered. It's almost like a kid trying to show their parent the amazing job they did in hopes they'll be praised.

"I wasn't sure which ones you preferred to use, so I grabbed a variety just in case."

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The reveal went right. Too right. Jack and Maddie will do anything to protect their son. Vlad will do anything to protect his new daughter. Dan will...suck it up.

When Danny told his parents he was Phantom, not only did they take it well, but they immediately started rallying to get the Anti-Ecto Acts taken down.

They rewrote their research, reached out to other Paranormal Scientists, and did everything they could.

That was when the assassination attempts started. They were all targeting...Danny. Not Jack, Maddie, or Jazz. Just Danny.

Moving Danny in with Vlad didn't stop them; if anything, the assassination attempts got even worse.

During a fight with one particular assassin that got past Vlad's security, Danny, Dan, and Dani knocked over some of Vlad's more...unstable experimental Ecto.

It...changed them. Reflected the age of their Ghost selves.

Danny and Dani are now two years old. Dan is somewhere around twenty-four.

Vlad...thinks this is perfect. He has an idea. The government is trying to kill a sixteen year old, they won't look at a couple of toddlers.

He smuggles them out of Wisconsin and gives Dan a bag. Inside of that bag is cash, fake IDs, and all the fake history Dan would need to start a new life. His cover is he's a single father to a set of twins.

Vlad looks pleased with himself. Dan valiantly restrains from punching him.

It has nothing to do with the fact that there are two toddlers watching him with way-too-big eyes.

Dan...sucks it up. He's an adult now, he can just kill all the agents, he doesn't understand why Vlad is so desperate to run. But whatever. Fine, he guesses.

He starts his shitty new life.

His only saving grace is that his neighbor, a guy named Roy Harper, is also new to the whole parenting shtick. They end up hanging out more often or not, letting Roy's Lian play with Danny and Dani, and typically babysit for each other if they can.

~~~~~~

Years later, Dan ends up saving Lian's life during a huge attack on the city that caused the apartment to collapse.

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let's pretend that this is the right timeline because what if Dick becomes Batman at the same time when Wally becomes The Flash?

let's also say that this is just like the Justice League animated series wherein the League members don't know each member's identities (except of course Bruce, he knows everybody).

how funny would it be if Dick and Wally are together and the rest of the League are confused because all of a sudden Batman and Flash are close like super close? i mean they have witnessed how Flash gets intimidated by Batman. now, that's not the case anymore.

during a meeting:

Hal, leaning to John during a League meeting, whispers: I'm not losing my mind, right?

John, whispers back: I think I know what you mean.

Hal: Why is Flash making heart eyes to Bats????

John: I know??? Flash doesn't even look him in the eyes before.

Hal: That's so odd, dude.

Batman glances at the two Green Lanterns which makes them shut up.

meanwhile, across the table, Martian Manhunter has a light smile on his lips and Superman covers his laugh with a cough.

-

at the cafeteria:

Ollie: Hey, Dinah. Have you noticed something unusual between Batman and Flash lately?

Dinah: It is quite unusual, huh? I was talking to Hawkgirl the other day and she said she saw Flash bridal carry Bats.

Ollie: What the actual fu-

Flash, approaches the couple's table with a big bowl of nachos on his hand: Hey, guys! Mind if I sit with you?

Ollie and Dinah give a knowing look at each other. a conversation they definitely will finish later.

-

during in an another planet mission:

Batman, after announcing everyone's partners for the mission:... And lastly, I will pair up with Flash in today's mission.

Flash grins widely, that has Arthur thinking his cheeks might be hurting after that.

Arthur: Yeah, yeah. At this point, we already know, Bats!

the Green Lanterns, along with Captain Marvel and Booster Gold, snicker at his comment.

Batman ignores Arthur's comment and the rest of the members scatter to their assigned locations.

Victor, who was paired with Arthur: Was gonna give that comment too.

Arthur: It's like they are inseparable all of a sudden.

Victor, shakes his head: Well, I have seen weirder things.

-

in the meeting hall:

Wonder Woman, pulls Batman in the corner of the room: Okay, that's enough. You are truly ignoring me. What is going on with you lately?

Batman: Did the rest of the League put you up to this?

Wonder Woman, has her hands on her hips: They didn't need to. So, tell me. And don't you ever lie to me, I can see right through you, Batman.

Batman, sighs: It's hard for me to explain. I can't-I can't tell you right now.

Wonder Woman: Hera! Now, Bru-Batman.

before Batman responses, the door of the meeting hall opens and in comes Robin with his katana. the conversations between the League members come to a stop as they stare at the young hero.

Robin, glances at everyone, before approaching Flash: I need help with an important matter.

Flash, smiles and ruffles Robin's hair, as if that's second nature: Of course, little dude.

Hal, stands up from his seat: THAT'S IT! Can somebody tell me what the hell is going on????

Ollie, stands up with him: Are we in another dimension that I don't know about?????

Dinah pulls Ollie down by his arm to make him sit again.

the rest of the League members start to converse against each other.

Superman, floats a bit from his seat: Why don't we all settle down? There's nothing to be alarmed about.

Robin, shakes his head: Tt. Absolute fools.

by the time Bruce and Barry are back:

-

Bruce, pinches the bridge of his nose: Chum, you could at least be discreet with Wally.

Dick: It's not my fault, B! I swear I was going to explain to Aunt Diana then Dami entered the room.

Damian: Tt. Don't blame me, Grayson. Why don't you lecture West on how to be more responsible? He left me on read when I asked help for my Science project.

Dick, sighs: And what about Timmy? He could have helped.

Damian: I don't want anything to do with Drake.

Bruce massages his temples as he feels a headache coming up.

-

Barry: Wally!!!!

Wally, zooms right in front of Barry: I couldn't help it, okay?? Dick is just irresistible.

Iris giggles as she prepares the table for dinner.

Barry, sighs: That's alright. I'll talk to Bats on how we can explain it to the team.

Wally, grins and sits down by the table: It was hard not to laugh at them. They were so confused.

Barry, chuckles: I'm sure Hal's expression was the funniest.

Wally, laughs: You have no idea, Uncle Barry.

[diabolichare]

Looking for TimKon or just Conner Kent centric fics and prompts. I like cracks, fluff and angsty stuff too. Would be even better if it's about the relationship between Clark and him (family feels, pls no ship).

Any recommendations?

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isekai about a nyc apartment block getting teleported into a fantasy realm, and how this group of people who previously have only had incidental contact with one another come together to build a vibrant community in their new circumstances. there's a season-long arc about introducing bagels and pizza to the fantasy world that gets into the details of sourcing ingredients, developing new technologies, and learning how to work with supernatural substitutions.

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the batkids decide play a new game on patrol where they try to yell the most outrageous thing jumping into a fight

bruce bans the game after stephanie runs into a crowd of bystanders and muggers yelling

‘bienvenue power bottoms!’

and it causes jason to crash into a power pole from how hard he was laughing

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What do you think of the fanfic idea I’ve seen floated a few times and seen a few fics of the concept of YJ Wally creasing and then speedforcing (flying throw dimensions) and into the JLU verse. I think it’s a pretty funky idea, mostly because I can imagine yj Wally being able to actually grow into a Wally flash I love seeing in the comics which I think JLU nails so well. Plus JLU has Linda Park and Linda Park is cool.

I absolutely adore those crossovers AUs!!!

Such fun (and also full of angst) fic ideas, like one of my many favs: such classics as How to Outrun Death by Lore55

or Better Late by Kyogre

and others (more Nightflash/Birdflash than gen, like LoveStar14/Dragonfire13's Wally the Flash or Kid Flash? series

and kebwins' Cross Dimensional Nightflash series).

Im honestly surprised that there isnt more of this AU crossover fics, there is just so much potential and fun to have ! ;D wish we had more of those...

As a person who didnt get a chance to grow up with comics and had JL/JLU as my first introduction to Justice League, JLU!Flash exists in my head as a completely separate entity from comics and YJ, but from what I gathered he is pretty close to his older/original comic counterpart! Same unhinged overpowered energy lmao.

Also NGL i completely forgot Linda was in JLU! She appeared like in one episode, but you are right anon, Linda Park is cool and the fact that her one and only animated appearance is in JLUverse is absolutely rad and makes JLU so much better. Though who knows, there is still hope for other animated series to have her. ;D

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Reading amazing fanfiction, then forgetting to bookmark it

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Reasons other batkids are in Jason’s apartment

Jason: “Did you… is that… Did you eat the ENTIRE THING?”

Dick: “In my defense Alfred has been gone a week.”

—————

Jason: “Why did you need my help with this again?”

Damian: “Grayson would insist on retaining photographic evidence, Gordon would take too long, Cain and Brown are not in the country, and Drake is an idiot.”

Jason: “You do realize Tim is like, a genius, right?”

Damian: “Tt. Debatable, seeing how Drake failed to complete high school.”

Jason: “Right… You know when you said you needed help I thought you meant with hiding a body or something, not…” *gestures vaguely to Damian’s unfinished science diorama*

—————

Steph: “Ugh. Why is this so hard? It’s not like this is even the first gala I’ve been dragged to.”

Jason: “Why do I need to pick?”

Steph: “Apprently I need to ‘expand my color palette’ or something.”

Jason: “Doesn’t really explain why me.”

Steph: *sighs* “Have you SEEN what Dick and Tim consider acceptable clothing choices?”

Jason: *cringes*

Steph: “Damian is an obvious no seeing as I’m not actually a masochist, And Cass is out of town.”

Jason: “Why am I always second to Cass?”

Steph: “EVERYONE is second to Cass.”

Jason: “Fair. What about Babs?”

Steph: “Just shut up and help me pick a dress, boy zombie.”

Jason: “Whatever, Blondie.”

—————

(Cass, dropping off half a dozen nerf guns)

Jason:

Cass: “They’re being annoying.”

Jason: “Oh hell yeah.”

—————

Tim: “I need help hiding a body.”

Jason:

Tim:

Jason:

Tim:

Jason: “YOU?”

Tim: “What? I didn’t kill him.”

Jason: “Somehow that is so much worse.”

Tim: “Oh, don’t worry, he’s dead.”

Jason:

Tim: “I just need to hide it somewhere for a few weeks.”

Jason:

Tim:

Jason: “Yeah, okay.”

(Three weeks later)

Jason: *watching a video feed of an increasingly paranoid Lex Luthor*

Jason:

Jason: “I don’t even want to know.”

—————

Babs: “I need your help finding a body.”

Jason:

Jason:

Jason: *mentally cursing Tim*

—————

(Bonus)

Bruce:

Jason:

Bruce:

Jason: “Why?”

Bruce: *breaking down* “I can’t take it anymore.”

Jason: “How is this my problem?”

Bruce: “They just won’t STOP.”

Jason: “You do realize you chose to have this many kids, right?”

Bruce: “Where did they even GET Green Lantern themed batarangs?”

Jason:

Jason:

Jason: “Fine. You can take the couch.”

[diabolichare]

DPXDC prompt: Dead on main. No trick only treat.

~~Сhildhood friends and deals~~

The Justice League has to summon a ghost from another dimension to address the threat. They don’t know what price the Ghost King will take but there’s little time to bargain. Another spirit threatening them has already seized all the computers on their base. John doesn’t know what else to offer. A summoned ghost starts to look bored. Gold, jewelry? A favor from a member of the League? Like the Ruler of All Dead needs it. No one dares to make another offer, and the King is in no hurry to set out his demands. Maybe try to pull off a soul sale scam?

Suddenly, Red Hood breaks into the hall, walks up to Phantom and shakes his shoulder vigorously. Red Hood: You, get Technus out of here right now. I need access to the files and fast. Phantom: That’s rude, dude. Where did you grow up? in the cave? No "hello, no how are you, Danny", really? Red Hood: I’ll pay the usual price. Phantom: Deal.

What is the price? John sees Batman and gets in his way. The usual price, his guy said. Means Jay was already out of the deal alive and well. This hyperprotective bat would only piss off the ruler if he interfered.

The King quickly deals with his subordinate using a thermos and remains to watch working Hood. Red Hood: What do you want? I’m busy. Danny: You and I have a contract~ Red Hood: All right, all right. Jay throws M&Ms right in the face of the ghost. But king doesn’t look angry. He opens the package and starts sorting the candies by color. Phantom quickly eats up all the green ones and passes the red ones to Hood. Jason takes them without any questions.

Strange. John has never seen a summoned creature share its reward with a human. And the son of a bat looks too comfortable with it. Wait, since when do super-powered beings think that candy is a decent wage?John makes one of the most likely deductions using his experience. Constantine: Batsy, how long has your son been sleeping with the King of Ghosts? Batman: He…what?!

~~~~~~~

Dick *knocking at the door*: Little Wing, you hate ectoplasm and everything what is neon green, so why? He’s dangerous! Jason who turned on the music to not listen to his crazy family: ~He’s poison but tasty~

Dick: NoOOoo

~~~~~~

Jason: And now everyone thinks that I sold my virginity to you for a bargain or something, because interdimensional creatures like you aren’t supposed to help for nothing. Like you’re playing favorites. I’m gonna fucking kill John. Danny: Well, I wouldn’t say no to that. Jason: What? Danny: I mean, to k-kill John, yeah. How dare he.. Jason: Omg, you’re still so terrible liar, Fenton.

Danny: Sorry :(

Jason: No. Say it again.

~~~~Twelve years ago~~~~ Maddie wasn’t thrilled to learn that Danny was trying to make friends with Todd’s son. Their neighbor was terrible. And his son was definitely a street rat and probably a juvenile delinquent. Maddie: Danny, honey, there’s got to be a reason this boy is talking to you. Even kids from the crime alley are always looking for a bargain they can make or a fool they can fool. Danny: But Jason is so cool! He knows so much about books and alleys and.. Maddie: But you don’t want to be a fool, do you? Danny: Okay, Mom, I get it.

So, if Danny wants a cool friend, he’s got to offer a bargain.

He didn’t have a lot of pocket money for every month but Jason needed it more anyway. And his lunch that Jack was picking for him was big enough for two and only bitten on Tuesdays. Nice. Jason: Do I understand correctly? You will pay me and give me food, and I, what? Protect you from bullies? Danny: No! I’m not weak, I don’t need to be protected. Just..maybe we could sit together at lunch and walk each other home sometimes? Jason: Nay Danny: But why? You want something else? Jason: Money’s fine but your homemade food is…strange. Danny: I can bring sweets if you want. Jason: Deal. 3 pop tarts for a joint lunch, a party size bag of M&Ms if you waste my time out of school.

~~~~

Sometimes they share sweets when they hang out but more often Jayson takes them home to save in case his parents have money problems. Sweets have a long shelf life stored and he may not be afraid to poison himself. Over time, candy becomes their currency and a secret language for all occasions. Need help without unnecessary questions? M&Ms. Problems with learning? Skittles. The question is about family? Snickers. There will be a serious conversation? Pop Tarts.

Jason: One snickers and a pack of gum. Danny: Yeah, Jason? What do you want? Jason: My mom wants to meet my friend. Come to lunch on Sunday. Danny: Okay, you managed to pay for my expensive services. Jason:…and you just lost the gum from the deal.

~~~~~~

Jason threw a package at Danny: Three pop tarts. We need to talk. Danny: All right? Jason: Why are you avoiding me all week?! Danny: Well, it’s just..you’re Wayne now. Jason. Still Todd. And what about that? Danny: You can hang out with the cooler guys now, I didn’t want to embarrass you. Jason: Bullshit! I’m still the street rat, and you’re trying to avoid our contract. me. And I don’t even need money from you anymore. What the hell? I thought you are my friend. Danny: And I am!

~~~~~~

Robin: What’s a schoolboy doing in an alley at night? Danny: Um, I…nothing? Don’t tell my parents, Mr. Robin sir. Robin: It will cost you so many Chunky Bars, you have no idea. Danny:...Jason? Jason: N-no. Danny: Damn yes. What are you doing in green shorts on the street at night?! Jason: Cosplay. Danny: Oh yeah? Then I’m just your hallucination. Don’t hesitate to ghost me. I’m going home, Disgrace In Pixie Boots, bye. Jason: fu%&c$#u

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Dp x dc prompt

So this starts with Danny becoming the ghost king on his 18th birthday and almost immediately every power-hungry ghost in existence starts proposing to him. At first he just ignores it but after the 10th time someone tries to kidnap him to marry him Greek god style, he’s fucking sick of it and goes to Clockwork for help.

He’s not much help. The only way for other people to stop trying to marry him is if he’s already married. What’s more, because he’s the king of the infinite realms, it has to be someone that’s considered a citizen of the Infinite Realms. (Like he can marry someone that’s still alive but they wouldn’t count and people will just keep trying to marry him) CW also warns him that people will try and kill anyone he marries if they can so a living person isn’t really ideal. The only bit of real helpfulness he does provide is a list of non-evil non-power-hungry citizens so he can have an easier time finding someone.

So Danny takes the list and starts crossing of names (like Johnny, even tho the guy won’t abuse the power of being the ghost princess, kitty would kill Danny for good this time) when he comes across the perfect candidate.

Jason Todd (Robin/Red Hood)

He’s been to Gotham before, knows the Robins all do good work and knows the Red Hood is already a good and fair ruler of his criminal underground. Plus the guy could definitely fight off any ghost trying to kill him even without the power boost and some helpful weapons Danny would give him if he agrees. Plus he has the perfect bargaining chip to get the guy to help by offering to fix the corrupted ectoplasm in him (not that he wasn’t gonna do that anyway when he had the time to but Hood didn’t need to know that)

So Danny hops over to Gotham and after quickly getting permission from Lady Gotham (she’s very protective of her Knights) heads over to crime ally and pitches the idea to Red Hood.

Which basically goes like-

Danny: so I give u, the title of prince, access to the Infinite Realms whenever u wish, a sweet private wing in my castle, any of the op ghost weapons in the castles armoury and a fix for ur rage problems and u marry me so I stop getting people trying to propose to me in increasingly more annoying ways :)

Jason, a literature geek with a secret desire to be the protagonist in a shitty YA romance: u had me at Prince

So the two of then jump over to the Infinite Realms to get married thinking it’ll take 30 minutes top only to learn that CW left out that a Royal wedding has to take at minimum a week otherwise no one will consider the Marriage valid. So the two, not backing out at this point, join in on the week of parties and celebrations without putting much more thought into it.

Meanwhile back in Gotham, after not having Red Hood check in after his patrol, Oracle searches CCTV and finds Jason having a conversation with a figure that is glitching out the camera to much to identify them, then the figure seemingly grabs Jason and drags him into a portal and the two of them disappear.

So obviously the Batfam comes to the conclusion that Jason was kidnapped by some sort of magical being and calls in John. He identify the magic as that of the ghost king’s and has been hearing that the king had been looking for a bride so comes to the conclusion that Jason has been kidnapped Persephone style to be be married and is under the (wrong) conclusion that it will mean Jason can’t leave the realm of the death after.

And so the Batfam + Constantine start planing to crash a wedding.

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DP x DC Prompt #18

One night while lamenting about Joker to Phantom, Phantom asks him a few odd questions. Joker's not a real clown, of course he wouldn't have an egg? Maybe he should've been concerned when Phantom said he'd take care of it.

He wasn't prepared for Batman to call him because of the Joker. No, not because of Joker, but for Joker. Apparently a bunch of clowns were beating up Joker for giving clowns a bad name.

It was the funniest night of Dick's life.

[diabolichare]

Poison Ivy is hired to revive an extinct flower. It's good money and the flower has no adverse effects on the environment so she's more than happy to take the job.

She thinks everything is good and continues to grow these flowers for her client. Until a child shows up in her greenhouse and informs her that the flowers she's been providing are actually going to a branch of the government and are being used to destroy the a different realm.

The government has been tricking her into destroying the environment, earthly or not. Soon they'd learn exactly why Poison Ivy is feared.