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drewsb12 · 2 hours ago

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Hiii, could I request a namgyu x reader fic. where nam gyu and reader being on oposing sides (her being on the gin hun team) but after he loses his drugs, for some reason he just starts desprately latching onto her? thanks

Is It Over (Why Dont You Kill Me)AO3 Writing blog @conelluwrites Words: 2,7k Warnings: Platonic Dae-ho x reader, withdrawal, no smut. Nam-gyu is referred as 'Player 124' until he tells her his name. Other: Nam-gyu is a pathetic wet dog here, please let him in and clean him up. Gi-hun's team was mostly evaporated by the start of this fic. I also watched this gif in another window the entire time I wrote while listening to City and Colour's cover of Hop A Plane hah... Didn't wanna make it angst so the ending does feel a lil abrupt, I'm sorry.

After the rebellion failed, the team she had come to find comfort in was looking barren. Gi-hun was handcuffed, Jung-bae was dead, Young-il didn’t return, and Dae-ho was… Well… he was stuffing his face full of food. She thinks it’s stress eating, but she doesn’t bring it up- what is she supposed to say anyway that won’t sound insensitive and vitriolic? She sits next to him taking significantly smaller bites of her food while trying to ignore the way that Gi-hun stares daggers at him. She knows where his anger stems from, she was there when Yong-sik said Dae-ho froze up and didn’t bring the ammo. She looks around the increasingly less populated room and spots Player 124 looking at her. He doesn’t look angry, doesn’t seem like he’s feeling much of anything. Maybe he’s just zoned out or something? It wouldn’t shock her, to be honest. She looks away from him and focuses back on finishing her meal.

The next game’s set up is easy enough to understand- two teams, red team being the seekers and blue team being the hiders. She was one of the first people to twist the machine’s crank. She holds her breath while closing her eyes, letting the ball fall into her hands. She opens them slowly- it was blue. She turns around and holds it up to Dae-ho, who’s in the far back, before going to the blue side. Dae-ho also gets a blue colored ball and stands next to her. He doesn’t speak, he doesn’t need to, he just exhales a shaking breath and nods to her. She hardly pays attention as the other players draw their balls, catching Player 124’s eyes before the eye contact breaks. It’s easy enough to put off as an accident, so she doesn’t think about it too heavily as he walks over to the red side. Her brain is too preoccupied with what’s next, what could possibly happen to them. Red . Gi-hun draws the final ball and it’s red. She feels Dae-ho tense up drastically beside her, his hand knocking against hers.

Keys and knives. The boxes provided to the blue team contain a key, the boxes provided to the red team contain knives. Her stomach drops and she looks up at Dae-ho who glances nervously to his side to see Gi-hun staring at him. She looks back down at the box, pulling the necklace out and placing it around her neck. She knows she needs to offer some sort of comforting words to him, say literally anything, but any words die on her tongue. When they’re told they can switch sides, she weighs her options heavily. Wait out the time, or potentially find the exit versus having to kill someone. She sighs heavily, sitting down and fidgeting with the box. Her ears find his voice quickly, Players 124 and 125 are pretty close to her after all. She doesn’t look over to the pair, but she listens in.

“You could always switch with that girl.” Player 124 says, pointing over to her with the knife in his hand, “c’mon, a thing like you killing someone? Laughable. We gotta stick together, Min-su .”

Player 125, rather Min-su, looks over to her before returning to Player 124. He doesn’t speak, at least not with any volume that registers in her ears.

She looks around the room, not caring enough to listen to the rest of their conversation. Dae-ho is frantically trying to convince a red player to switch with him but it doesn’t seem to be going too well. If someone like Dae-ho can’t convince someone to switch, then she has no chance. Slouching slightly, she shakes her head. No use in focusing on what she can’t change, she needs to focus on what she can do.

The main room is claustrophobic, especially with all the blue team players crowded in it. The slam of the doors behind her makes her jump and she turns out instinctively despite knowing what that noise is.

Two minutes.

She thinks about sticking around Dae-ho, but he takes off in a direction without saying a word. She could follow him, but she would just be dragging him down. She gives herself a second to freak out in her head before choosing a random hallway. Focus on finding a far away room, focus on finding the exit, focus on lasting the 30 minutes.

“Fuck.” She mutters under the breath. Her key doesn’t fit in the door. She gives a glance to the lock- circle- then a glance to her key- square. Goddammit, of course it wouldn’t be as easy as all the doors being unlockable by everyone. She hears the audio cue to the seekers to start prowling and she feels panic set in. She’s a reasonable distance away from the start, she thinks so at least, but she’s alone. Even Jun-hee seemed to have a team behind her. She can’t afford to give up when it’s not even a minute into the game. She takes off into another direction, hoping she’s not going to run into a red vest. This continues on- finding a door, can’t unlock it, move on or finding a door, going up or down steps, and moving on. Of course some fo the doors lead ot fucking nowhere, opening out into a big drop.

She can hear that obnoxious, grating laughter from a mile away. His laughter, his voice floods her ears before her heart starts to pound so wildly that it blocks out all other noise. No, no, no… She tries another door but it fails. She can practically feel the shred of the knife going through her, feel her warm blood cooling on her skin. She looks behind her and sees the briefest hint of a red vest and black hair behind a wall and she goes the opposite direction. Her footsteps alert him though and she panics harder, she’s not quick enough to avoid his line of sight. For a moment, for what feels like forever, they just stare at each other. Then a sinister grin spreads over his lips before he raises a finger up to his lips in a shooshing motion and then fucking skips away. She can’t hear the words he says to whoever the hell he’s with, her anxiety too high to process anything other than the fact she could have just died. She barely registers anything when the audio of Player 388 being eliminated and Player 456 passing.

When it does hit her, she feels sick. She knows she needs to focus on staying alive but she can’t help but wonder about her friend’s final moments being spent with a teammate… ex-teammate… Was it quick? Was it slow? Shelooks down at her hands as they tremble. She doesn’t want to think about it, she can’t bring herself to stop going through her memories of Dae-ho. The following minutes just feel like autopilot- running when she needs to, hiding when she needs to, she even manages to collect another key from a corpse.

The dormitory is nowhere near as full as it once was as she walks to her bunk. She glances around, trying to figure out what platers passed and which players were eliminated but her thoughts are interrupted as Player 124 starts to freak out. Something about him losing a… thing…? in the hide and seek rooms. He goes to grab the fucking gun from one of the triangle masks, piquing her interest even more. Of course he doesn’t get the gun and is slammed to the ground, the gun then getting pointed at him before there’s a cry. A… Cry? Her head jerks away from Player 124 and towards the door. Jun-hee had her baby. She feels a sharp hit of protectiveness before it dwindles to nothing- she’s not strong enough to protect a new mother or a newborn, she’s barely strong enough to protect herself when it comes to the remaining players.

The time moves by surprisingly quickly, she spends the time zoned out before there’s a tap on her shoulder.

“Hey, look, I don’t usually do this but can I sit with you?” Player 124 stammers out so shakily that she almost asks him to repeat himself but he does it on his own accord, “can I sit with you?” He’s a fucking mess, blood on his face and hands, his jacket isn’t even on him and he’s breathing so hard that the rise and fall of his shoulders is incredibly visible. She nods slowly before scooting over, giving him ample room. He doesn’t offer her a thanks, hell he doesn’t say anything. He just sits down and runs his fingers through his greasy air before wiping his sweating face.

“Are you okay?” Her voice is quiet, just audible to Player 124. He jumps at the sound of her voice as if he was so lost that he forgot she was there. She feels her eyebrows furrow in concern.

“Wha- yeah, obviously I’m fine. So fucking fine.” He snaps before shaking his head and sighing. “Look- it- I’m sorry for snapping at you.” He says, his voice quieter and more subdued.

“What’d you lose in there?”

“This damn, uh, this damn necklace.” He says, making a motion around his neck to show where it’d be. “It was Thanos’s but he died and I- I took it. It has these pills in it, see, and I need them. I need them so I can operate and function and I just…” He trails off, knowing that he has to sound like some drug addict, which he can’t deny. His words are all jumbled together and stuttering, he’s sweating like it’s a million degrees even without his jacket, and

She’s silent as she tries to soak in his words without overstepping her boundaries by asking for more information. It’s a lot to take in all at once, but she understands the basics. She wants to apologize, but she knows it’ll ring hollow.

“Goddammit don’t look at me like that.”

“I’m sorry.”

Silence stretches between them before he rests his head on her shoulder, making her body tense up at the sudden contact. Even between her and Dae-ho contact was severely limited and now this new guy comes over and rests his head on her? She’s not strictly opposed, though like everyone else in this place he could go for a hair washing and shower. She breathes out slowly to force her body to relax.

“Don’t apologize, dumbass. You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m just- It’s just- I’m scared, man.” The last part, the part where he admits to being scared, is so damn quiet that she can barely hear him. “Look, my hands are already fuckin’ shaking.” He says, holding up his hand for her to see. His hand is trembling like a damn leaf. “Guess that bitch wasn’t wrong when she called me Mr. Shaky Hands or whatever.”

She nods, unsure of who that bitch is- presumably someone on his team that he had lost.

“What’s your name? I’ll feel weird just calling you ‘Player 124’ in my head.”

“Nam-gyu. Use it. I’m not just a damn player.” He says, clenching his shaking hand up tight.

“Nam-gyu.” She repeats, committing it to memory the best she can before she introduces herself. He nods his head, adjusting himself so he’s more or less curled up at her side as she slowly lies back on the bunk. He’s warm, almost disgustingly so, but she doesn’t shove him away. It’s the least she can do for giving her a break during the last game.

She can feel his body tense, relax, and tremble in a cycle like he’s trying his damn hardest to calm down but he’s just unable to. “Look up at me, let me at least clean off your face, okay?” Her voice is soothing and steady, a sharp contrast to his own voice. “You’re a mess, let me do this for you.”

He grunts in response, looking up at her before closing his eyes as she tugs at her jacket sleeve until it’s over her hand. He feels the contact of the soft track jacket and flinches away before settling back into her touches. The blood wipes away as she pours water on the sleeve, wipes, and repeats. It takes some effort, but he’s relatively clean when she’s done.

They settle back on the bunk, she has an arm tucked behind her head and the other is around Nam-gyu’s shoulders to hold him closer to her body. She knocks her foot against his, rubs soothing circles on his shoulder, and hums. It’s an oddly peaceful moment amongst all the anxiety she’s been facing.

“Why’d you not kill me earlier?”

“You didn’t deserve it. A thing like you getting stabbed by me and that dickhead Myung-gi… What a sorry way to go.”

“Oh.”

Silence, then she adds, “thank you.” The silence that encapsulates them isn’t uncomfortable, nor does she want to break it. He puts an arm over her abdomen and rubs her side, his hand under her shirt to feel the warmth of her skin- to remind him that he’s not alone.

When it’s almost lights out, he goes to get up before she grabs his hand and tugs him back down.

“Stay here, okay? You don’t gotta go back to your own bunk. Stay here… please ? I don’t wanna be alone.” She appeals more to his ego with her please , she figures it’ll be easier to get him to agree that way than if she sat and insisted that he needed to stay for his own good.

“Yeah, sure.” He says, tugging the thin blanket over both of them. He’s not used to being the one getting held, but it feels damn nice. The way her fingers run through his hair, her other hand rubbing up and down the length of his arm from his wrist to his elbow. Her eyes are closed, but she’s not asleep yet. She’s waiting for him to fall asleep, and sleep comes fast for him.

It’s not a restful sleep, he makes various noises, twists and turns to the point she nearly falls from her bunk, but she makes sure she keeps some part of ehr body touching his. Be it from her spooning him or her foot grazing his leg, she wants him to know he’s not alone even in his sleep.

When she wakes up to the damn music she feels a weight on her and pushes it off. But the weight just holds her tighter, nuzzling up into her neck. It takes her a moment to blink away the last incoherent tired thoughts before she realizes it’s just Nam-gyu. He groans something in response as she tries to sit up, it’s inaudible though.

“C’mon, we gotta get this done.” She says, hesitating before placing a kiss to the crown of his head. “We got this if we do it together, yeah? I got you. You’re not alone .”

He doesn’t respond back, he’s not about to get sappier than he already let himself get last night. But her words do mean a lot to him, more than he’ll ever admit even to himself. It’s a bittersweet feeling, he can’t help but wonder what life would have been like if they had met sooner. Either outside of the games or within it, he’s sure she would have been his lucky charm.

Everything was so damn fast, Min-su taunting Nam-gyu and then tossing the necklace over to the bridge where it lands. The mechanical creaking of the rope feels her ears and within seconds she’s back next to Nam-gyu who’s looking increasingly anxious as if he’s debating just running for it.

“Nam-gyu, don’t.” She says, tugging his jacket and forcing his attention to turn back towards her. “If you’re gonna get it, don’t be an idiot. Grab it and make it across to the end. It’s just jump rope, you can do this.” She continues, “you don’t want to be alone, I don’t want to be alone. Let’s do this together.”

He looks conflicted as he looks back to where Min-su threw the cross necklace before he reluctantly nods and takes a step forward while pushing her behind him. He’s got this. He’s got this if he has her. It’s just jump rope.

#i love it !!!#nam gyu #nam gyu x reader #squid game #player 124

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