earth-updates

[earth-updates]

earth update v1.1, patch 4

effect: vampiric sheep plague (VSP) infection rate increased by 1.5%

television remotes invisibility effect duration increased by 30 seconds when individual sits down, unless held

simian entities goal point for next evolution stage now set: visible below the [hunger] meter on the HUD, quest self explanatory

fixed ranking system that placed hamsters at the top of the food chain algorithm - predetors should no longer cower in fear upon sighting one

added toggleable ability for florida bat population to identify republicans via speech patterns [e.g "i just wish they wouldn't flaunt it like that in public" or "its just that I don't think they should be allowed to participate in competitions, they have an innate advantage"]. detection turns all nearby bat entities hostile

territory of france reduced by another three(3) pixels, atlantic ocean tide increased by 0.0008%/year on the french coast

[earth-updates]

Proud owner of a gimmick blog but no idea how to run one

[earth-updates]

gimmick blog that appears completely benign, but the OPs of every post it reblogs die in a horrible accident just 5 days after the reblog

[earth-updates]

Albanese is apparently trending on Chinese social media at the moment because he is a “handsome boy” (????????)

What the fuck

[earth-updates]

Please follow proper procedure when frying things. Especially do not fry frozen things. Look where that got this poor Garlean Legatus

[earth-updates]

love

[earth-updates]

now that ive got a text tool i wanted to re write my last orc post

[earth-updates]

earth update v1.1, patch 3

south america temporarily reconnected to N.America for server support

"nostalgia grace period for shitty thing you loved in your childhood" effect increased by 4 years

naturally generated moss now grants the fire resistance effect when eaten, but only for a second - cooldown of 30 minutes

vampirism granted to one (1) randomly selected sheep in the Europe region - working on fix for servers crushing upon encounter

[earth-updates]

is naia = nyan? bcz if so that's so cool and if not that's cool too bcz naia is a cool name

i heard you piss on the poor

[earth-updates]

[earth-updates]

This tweet had me absolutely flabbergasted twice because I read this and I was like "Dame Aylin? The tall, blonde, supermodel demigoddess? How is she at all outside of the beauty standard? This is stupid" and then I scrolled down and there were a hundred replies by straight dudes who were calling her ugly and talking about anime women they prefer

[earth-updates]

[earth-updates]

earth update, v1.1 patch 2

raised max level by one (1) for bards, musicians and fry cooks.

added four empty inspiration slots for bardic classified characters, which refill every 12hrs of sleep (can be spread across multiple sessions)

changed bug into a feature which allows lightning to strike catholics in random events - 1/450 odds.

fixed stack overload which temporarily showed uzbekistan's population as -9999999

pepsi now made to be drank warm, cola to be drank cold - event lasts until 2/12

raised battleship level limit by 12, unless struck by rainbow at which point the level cap is lowered by 12

[earth-updates]

Noss National Nature Reserve, Isle of Noss, Bressay, Shetland, Scotland

[earth-updates]

Earth's next update should include inspiration points for the Writer class. You get a set amount of points per day based on your level, and how much experience you put into the Literature skill. They refill to maximum after a rest.

[earth-updates]

earth update, v1.1 patch 1

fixed render bug that made rain clouds invisible

rain no longer acidic to lactose intolerant people

fixed PvP immunity applying infinitely for pelicans

nerfed bullets freezing in the N. America region due to system overload, added servers to the region