The personal vent blog of someone who was encouraged by her alters to make one. Most posts will be by Sya, the host But others will post occasionally.
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Me: Hey, (Ex)? I don't like to set boundaries. But uh... Can you maybe not wish people would die in my server's vent chat?
Ex: Like, omigosh it's not a big deal? You're being too sensitive.
Me: No, it's just... I feel that it's not wishing pain on the person, but on the people who love and care about them. Because they're the ones who are going to suffer the most.
Ex: I super don't care. These people made my life hell, so I wish that they'd die.
Me: Yeah but... Again, it technically doesn't cause the lasting pain you'd want them to-- I'm just asking that you not say that in my server's vent chat. You can say it whenever where-ever else, but that's literally my safe space.
Ex: I GUESS.
Me: Thank you, really.. It's sent me into a couple spirals already, and I didn't want to cause problems about it, but...
Ex: Since YOU'RE gonna set boundaries, I'M gonna set boundaries. I don't like you calling kids "crotch gremlins".
Me: ... I usually refer to really bratty kids, or Karenlings that. But, okay. I can stop.
Ex: GOOD. Because it sounds gross, and I don't like it.
Me: Erm, okay...
#mental health#vent#ex problems#ex girlfriend#Seriously#My ex girlfriend#Decided that because I asked her as someone who's highly empathetic#That she stop wishing people would just drop dead#One of those being her own FATHER#Who supports her and has NO IDEA how vitriolic she feels towards him#And he's a nasa freaking scientist. His work does a lot of good for mankind#And she'd regularly wish he'd drop dead in my server's vent chat#Mind you she's older than me#And I was 30 at the time#She should have been way more mature about things than I#But left and right she loved to throw temper tantrums until she'd get her way#I still look back and cringe#Also god yeah she also decided that whenever I'd set a boundary. SHE'D set a boundary as well so it was “fair”.#I hardly ever set boundaries the way it was. And I enabled her on a lot out of love.#But me setting a hard boundary in regards to something like death? Meant that she wasn't 'being respected'. It was childish.
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My now-ex: 😮😍🥰 OMIGOSH ur so lucky 🤩 Having fictional characters in ur head?? 🤩😍🤩 I wish I had that omigosh 😢😭
Me: (Developed an identity disorder due to excessive CSA, abuse, trauma, neglect and isolation. And the disorder used fictional characters because I could understand and empathize with them more than actual humans) hahaha, yeah... Lucky.
Ex: 😄😁😄😄😄😄😄 I've read SO MUCH about this!! All about Tulpa! 🫨😮 I wasn't sure if I could manifest one but UR LIVING PROOF!! 😍🤩😍🤩🥰😍😍🥰
Me: W-wait what...? This was a survival and coping mechanism my brain developed.
Ex: OH MY GOSHH 🤩😍🤩😍 Like I'm feeling someone coming about in my headddd wowww I can't believe this is possible!! 🤩😍🤩😍🥰 I can finally talk to my favorite fictional characters!! 😘😍🤩
Me: ... Wow ok.
#mental health#osdd system#identity disorder#Don't mind the excessive emojis#Sands reminded me that my ex hated people using emojis excessively#So in a middle finger notion due to excessive emotional and verbal abuse she put me through? I have ensured her text is emojified#Seriously while it was nice to have it accepted? Having it fetishized and appropriated the way she did felt gross as all get out.#Tulpa#She was huge into Tulpa#And me recently coming to accept being a system after years of being afraid of it? I didn't know WHAT was going on with me.#I later found the proper words for us#It's OSDD Type 1b#And I love my headmates
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