edxanon

[edxanon]

today i hope trans lesbians:

get an extra nugget in their ten piece

find a four leaf clover

take a good selfie on the first try

get complimented on something they were feeling insecure about

get their eyeliner perfect

get a cute girl’s number

see a pretty sunset

realize how beautiful, brave, and loved they are

[edxanon]

soft and sweet like an apricot ˃̵͈̑ᴗ˂̵͈̑

[edxanon]

6.6.17

Sorry I've been gone so long. I haven't had the best time in my life. Today was my last day of school, it should've been a good day, but I couldn't stop crying all day. I had my heart broken last night, I also found out my Aunt Clara has gallbladder cancer, and is only expected to love another year. My day clearly hasn't been the best, but it has to get better, right?

[edxanon]

What a depressive episode with ED looks like

You can't sleep. And when you can sleep, you either only sleep for a few hours throughout the day & night or you sleep for 12+ hours. It doesn't matter how much rest you get. You're still exhausted to the point of begging to just go back to sleep. But your mind won't let you sleep, instead it twirls these negative horrible thoughts & memories around in this loop for hours. You want to distract yourself from the negative thoughts & shitty memories, but you're so tired & your body hurts so much that you can't get yourself to do anything. Aside from maybe watching movies. You might be able to read or write if your brain fog isn't as bad in that small moment during the day. You feel like everything you do is wrong. You talk wrong, you always say the wrong things & you're a dislikable dumb piece of shit for not knowing the right thing to say. You do daily chores wrong, you're too sloppy & you move too slow so what's the point in even trying. You write wrong, sing wrong, draw wrong. You're just fucking wrong. And when you're wrong all the time, you think, wtf is the point of all of this? What's the point of living when you contribute nothing to anyone or anything. You're useless & stupid, so why even bother anymore? You think everything is your fault. Your loved one is in a bad mood, and somehow it's because of you. Your neighbor seems pissed off & slammed their door to their apartment. It has to be because you did something to piss them off. It gets to the point where it pisses you off. You're frustrated that you can't seem to accomplish anything. You haven't been able to get out of your house in weeks because you're too "weak". I mean, it's just in your head, so why the fuck can't you just suck it up & get over it & move on? You snap on people. Cuss them out. Get violent. Have thoughts of harming people around you because they're fucking ignorant obnoxious assholes that won't leave you alone. You just want everyone to leave you the fuck alone. And then you hate yourself for wanting to beat the shit out of innocent people. So you think about cutting yourself. Because you're a pathetic piece of shit. You're a lazy asshole, you deserve to feel pain. You fantasize about dying. Or maybe somehow slipping into a coma. It would be relieving to just disappear for a while. Maybe even forever. Even though it's selfish as shit. Which makes you want to cut yourself again because you're a selfish asshole that would actually think about ending your own life & leaving your loved ones forever wondering if they could've stopped you. You try to lessen these horrible morbid ass feelings of guilt, rage, & extreme remorse with alcohol & drugs. Yeah, it works. Temporarily. Then you feel guilty & horrible for turning to dope again in the first place. And once again, think about cutting yourself. Or killing yourself. Everything is hopeless. You're being sucked deep into this endless black hole of despair. It elongates you & twists you so dramatically to the point where you aren't even recognizable anymore. You look in the mirror & see a complete stranger. You don't know who you are anymore. All you know is that you hate yourself & want to hurt yourself. You want to change but you're so tired. Your body hurts so much. You feel legitimately physically ill. You actually begin to see doctors to try & figure out if there's something wrong with you. But it's just depression. It causes literal physical pain. Your chest hurts, your joints & muscles ache so badly. It's part of why you can't get out of bed. Because everything hurts. You want help but you don't know where to look for it. You don't want to talk to anyone because you say everything wrong, you don't even know what to say, & you know you'll just bring them down with you. You begin to become paranoid. Everyone hates you just as much as you hate yourself. Everyone is just pretending to like you just so they can go around behind your back & laugh at you with their real friends. Your family doesn't even want you, you're a fucking loser. They only pretend to love you because they feel obligated to. Eventually it gets to the point that you OD on your drug of choice. Either that, or you cut too deep & bleed out. The cops are called & you get escorted to the emergency room. Where they put you on suicide watch for 24 hours & bring in a psychiatrist to assess you. Then the ambulance will either take you to an actual mental health inpatient clinic, or a couple nurses will escort you up a couple floors to their mental wellness wing (aka the psych ward). And you get to live with the scars for the rest of your life. To remind you just how pathetic & stupid & worthless & dislikable you really are.

[edxanon]

Personal twitter!

I made a personal eating disorder twitter - @vegantoenail

[edxanon]

Today I had a nice talk with my mother about the both of us losing weight this summer, and she said that we really need to get fit™ and she also said she wouldn't be mad if I went on a few diets so at least I have something to look forward to🤷🏻‍♀️ also were supposed to be going to the park a lot so we can walk/run laps so😬

[edxanon]

This is amazing ♡ have you tried low calorie brownies? - 4 egg whites - 68 - 7 tbsp sugar (I have a very sweet tooth.. if you use less or use 0 cal sweetner its less calories) - 314 - 5 tbsp cocoa powder - 50 - 2 tsp vanilla extract - 0 - 3 tsp baking powder - 0 Mix together and cook for 10-15 mins at 180. Calorie amounts according to myfitnesspal. Makes 12 brownies at 37 cal each.

[edxanon]

Bulimia Side Effects You Didn't Excpect

- low sex drive - insomnia - more depression - loss of emotion - loss of empathy - dry skin - being cold - brain fog - addiction -- Unable to think straight. - Cold no matter what I'm wearing or how many blankets I'm under. - Physical exhaustion to the point that even standing is a chore. - Emotional outbursts, especially that which pertains to extreme sadness.

[edxanon]

Something's that have / haven't worked for me

I read Brain Over Binge and other books. I've tried all sorts of distraction techniques. I even wanted to go to a clinic that specialized in eating disorders, but I couldn't afford it. I felt super powerless against binge eating and hopeless. Every time I saw food, I had crazy desires to eat as much of it as I can, and I use to spend tons of time watching videos of people eating and cooking. The simple solution though was just changing what I eat. I'm not afraid of food anymore, and the last time I binged was Christmas. So here is what I've been eating. No processed or refined foods. No dairy, meat, fish, oils, butters, caffeine. With these restrictions it's not really possible for me to "binge" or overeat. I don't restrict myself on quantity or count calories because it's not necessary with the right food. Whenever I felt like binging, I ate something like plain oatmeal or a plain baked potato, and if I wanted to eat more then I kept eating, and the cravings go away. Sometimes I used to stuff myself on plain oatmeal because I knew it would be 100 times better than eating one piece of junk food then having it spiral out of control. Oatmeal and potatoes are two of the most satiating foods, and they're quite low calorie too, so there's no guilt or fear of overeating. Even if you ate 5 pounds of oatmeal it would only be like 1600 calories. Beans are also helpful because of how filling they are. It's difficult to be this restrictive in the beginning, but eventually your taste buds adjust to these simpler foods, and I have no interest in the foods I used to binge on anymore. Some specific foods that haven't worked for me are yogurt, bread, nuts, and basically kind of junk or processed food. Yogurt isn't filling at all and requires no effort to eat, so it was hard for me to stop eating it. Bread is always tempting for me to put unhealthy toppings on. Nuts are pretty high in calories, so it was hard for me to limit them. Same goes for any commercial food or something in a wrapper. The last thing that didn't work for me is avoiding food. If you go without food, your blood sugar will get low, and you will get more impulsive and more likely to eat sugary food. I've tried it over and over, but restriction has always resulted in more out of control eating.

[edxanon]

How to get out of the b/p cycle and go to restriction!

Hi guys. I haven't been on much recently for various reasons, one of them (a stupid one), is because I've gained a lot of weight after I lost a lot of weight. Now I'm back where I started from binging. I was determined not to purge for a while so I gained. Well that went out the window so I was purging but maintained. The b/ping got insane. 5-10 times a day I would b/p. I started throwing up blood every time. So I knew I had to stop. Now I'm starting to get back into restriction, slowly. Some of you may already know how to do this but for those stuck in the cycle, here's something to help you out. You have to do this in steps. Small steps. Make short term goals that can be accomplished. This will take time and a lot of patience. What I do is focus on one task each week-2 weeks. I put every ounce of energy into completing it no matter what. If I keep failing I keep trying, I stay on that task. I do it day by day and sometimes hour by hour, telling myself "if I can just get past this hour of no purging", so I trick my brain to keep going that way. And it's all about changing habits. That's all this is it's a habit. So here's the tasks try to accomplish. 1. Don't try to restrict for now 2. Stop purging 3. Stop binging 4. Start exercising 5. No more seconds 6. No more snacks 7. No more sweets 8. Stop drinking alcohol 9. Slowly eat better, more clean foods, fruits and veggies. Stop eating junk. 10. Slowly start restricting, but no less than 1200 a day or you'll go back to binging. Like I said, I give myself 1-2 weeks on each task. Because once it's been two weeks since I've binged, for example, I'm very likely not to do it anymore and I'm secure in my control and actually lose my desire to binge. These steps are very time consuming and you have to accept and live with your body and the way it is for now, but anything is worth getting out of the b/p cycle. It's really important too to find a good stress reliever, because that's mainly what binging is about. Hope this helps someone!

[edxanon]

What is EDNOS

I see a lot of questions regarding EDNOS and confusion on it as a whole. These are viable. Please keep bumped for newcomers and/or curious members. Knowing about EDNOS is important for the sufferers of it and their felt misplacement in the eating disorder community. REMEMBER: THERE ARE MORE THAN THREE EATING DISORDERS. I AM ONLY DISPLAYING THESE THREE FOR VALIDITY PRENOTE: RESTRICTIVE ED DEATH RATES Anorexia- 4 % Bulimia- 3.9 % EDNOS- 5.2 % People who struggle with EDNOS exhibit almost all of the same symptoms ofanorexia, bulimia and/or BED. They are at risk for the very same dangers, such as dehydration (which is deadly), heart attacks, and death. So why would someone with such serious issues not be given a diagnosis of anorexia or bulimia? People are given the diagnosis of EDNOS because the DSM-IV (a book that treatment professionals use when coding a diagnosis) lists out specific criteria that a person must be suffering with in order to receive a specific diagnosis. For example, an individual suffering from EDNOS can show nearly all the signs and symptoms of anorexia, yet still have a normal menstrual cycle or "normal" BMI (Body Mass Index), and therefore receive a diagnosis of EDNOS. Unfortunately, when given the diagnosis of EDNOS, sufferers and insurance companies feel like they are not sick enough to deserve treatment simply because they don't meet all of the criteria of more "well-known" eating disorders. That type of thinking is dangerous because any degree of eating disorder symptoms or thoughts is suffering enough, regardless of the diagnosis. No matter what the diagnosis, everyone deserves access to treatment and the chance to recover. According to ANAD (National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders), 52 % of eating disorder sufferers may have EDNOS -and EDNOS has been shown to have the highest death rates of any category of eating disorder. With numbers this high, it is a type of eating disorder that we need to become more knowledgeable about through prevention and research, so that we can better treat those suffering from EDNOS. http://www.kantorlaw...-Diagnosis.aspx What is EDNOS? EDNOS stands for Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified. This diagnosis might be given when a sufferer of an eating disorder doesn’t display all the symptoms of anorexia, bulimia or any other eating disorder diagnosis. They may instead be categorised as having EDNOS. Today we are mythbusting EDNOS. There are unfortunately false perceptions amongst some clinicians, sufferers and carers that EDNOS is not as serious and severe as other eating disorders. On the contrary it can be all those things and more. MYTH 1 “EDNOS sufferers will display different symptoms to sufferers of other eating disorder.” EDNOS can be a mixture of eating disorders, or one of the eating disorders, for example anorexia or bulimia, minus some of the symptoms. For example, a young woman may display symptoms of anorexia but still be getting her periods, which would mean they wouldn’t meet the diagnostic criteria for anorexia. MYTH 2“EDNOS accounts for a minority of eating disorder cases.” There is a misconception that EDNOS only affects a small percentage of sufferers. On the contrary, according to Beat, EDNOS affects 50% of sufferers. However, despite half of all eating disorder sufferers being diagnosed with EDNOS, we rarely hear the term in the media. This may be part of the reason why there is a misconception of how prevalent it is. MYTH 3“EDNOS is not as severe as the other eating disorders.” Not true. EDNOS can be extremely severe. EDNOS essentially can be both anorexia and bulimia combined, or one of the eating disorders minus some of the symptoms. This does not mean that it is less dangerous or less severe or less life threatening. Indeed, we have seen many presentations of EDNOS in our three treatment centres which are ust as severe as the most serious cases of anorexia and bulimia. In addition, EDNOS can also result in some of the long term effects on physical health, just as anorexia and bulimia. Equally, just like with anorexia and bulimia – recovery is possible in even the most severe cases. MYTH 4“People with EDNOS will receive different or less intensive treatment.” This is again not true. According to their symptoms and severity they will receive the most appropriate treatment to aid their recovery, regardless of the type of eating disorder. If someone with EDNOS is presenting more symptoms of Bulimia, CBT may be used in treatment. If they are showing more signs of anorexia, then CAT might be used to help with recovery. It’s important to remember that every individual is different and must be treated with this in mind. What works for one person, may not work for another. We often use a combination of therapies and strategies when working to combat the illness and help a sufferer recover. MYTH 5“Some GPs may feel that giving the diagnosis of EDNOS to a sufferer will be less traumatic.” This is not true, and in fact in many instances the opposite is the case. People with eating disorders often suffer from low self esteem and experience feelings of unworthiness. Being told that “you are not quite anorexic/bulimic” “you fall short of the criteria” can be very damaging. In fact, in some cases, the diagnosis of EDNOS can make some sufferers feel that they are not “good enough”, which can translate to, they are not “ill enough” to be taken seriously. Again this is entirely unfounded. As we have stated earlier, EDNOS can be just as severe as the other eating disorders and the recovery from EDNOS must be taken seriously by all involved. http://www.careukeat...-5-mythbusters/ >>>>>> SUBTYPES AND THE OSFED CHANGE Other Specified Feeding or Eating Disorder (OSFED) Eating Disorders Not Otherwise Specified (EDNOS) from the DSM-IV has been transformed into OSFED (Other Specified Feeding or Eating Disorder. OSFED is a feeding or eating disorder that causes significant distres or impairment, but does not meet the criteria for another feeding or eating disorder. Eating disorders are not always black and white, and individuals can exhibit disordered eating patterns even if they don’t meet the threshold for a full-blown diagnosis. OSFED has five subtypes: 1. Atypical Anorexia Nervosa: Restrictive behaviors and features without meting the low weight criteria. 2. Bulimia Nervosa: Meets the criteria for Bulimia Nervosa but at a lower frequency and/or limited duration. Episodes of eating, in a discrete period of time an amount of food that is larger than what most individuals would eat with a feeling of lack of control. This followed by inappropriate compensatory behaviors to prevent weight gain, such as self-induced vomiting; misuse of laxatives, diuretics, excessive exercising, fasting. 3. Binge Eating Disorder: Meets the criteria for Binge Eating Disorder but at a lower frequency and/or limited duration. Episodes of eating, in a discrete period of time an amount of food that is larger than what most individuals would eat with a feeling of lack of control. 4. Purging Disorder: Recurrent purging of calories by self induced vomiting, misuse of laxatives and diuretics, excessive exercising. This subtype does not include binge eating. 5. Night Eating Syndrome: Recurrent episodes of night eating, as manifested by eating after awakening from sleep or by excessive food consumption after the evening meal. There is awareness and recall of the eating. The risks associated with OSFED are severe. Individuals with OSFED will experience risks similar to those of the other eating disorders. Some previous studies show the mortality rate of EDNOS as high as individuals who meet the thresholds for Anorexia. Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder The main feature of this type of eating disorder is avoidance or restriction of food intake that interferes with minimum nutritional intake of food to sustain the individual, i.e. significant weight loss, significant nutritional deficiency, dependence on oral supplements or other feeding, and marked interference with psychosocial functioning. It usually develops in infancy or early childhood and may persist in adulthood. For some individuals, food avoidance may be based on sensory characterizes of quality of food with sensitivity to appearance, color, smell, texture, or taste. According to the DSM V, there is currently insufficient evidence directly linking avoidance /restrictive food intake disorder and subsequent onset of an eating disorder. Unspecified Feeding or eating disorder UFED This category is used as a preliminary diagnosis when insufficient information is available to make a specific diagnosis. Symptoms include all disordered eating patterns that cause significant distress or impairment. Please note: It is important to realize that not everyone who is of low weight has an eating disorder; it is important to recognize that it is the intense fear of gaining weight or of becoming fat, along with persistent behaviors that interferes with normal weight gain that is the key factor. The DSM V continues to use BMI as a means to diagnosis Anorexia Nervosa and specify current severity: Mild: BMI >17 Moderate: BMI 16-16.99 Severe: BMI 15-15.99 Extreme: BMI <15 Eating Disorders Not Otherwise Specified (EDNOS) Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified (EDNOS) is no longer considered a valid diagnosis, according to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders-V. For those previously diagnosed with EDNOS you would now be under the eating disorder diagnosis of Other Specified Feeding or Eating Disorder (OSFED). http://www.anad.org/...wise-specified/

[edxanon]

How I got rid of sweets cravings

Hey all, i used to have a bad addiction to shit foods like ice cream, chocolate, crisps, hot chips and especially soda. It was so bad id get WITHDRAWLS. Wanna know how I beat it, and lost some pounds? Its so easy. I gave myself a 1 month long diet of not eating any of these things. I had 1 cup of lemonade on my partners mums birthday but other than that i stuck to it and i dont crave any of it at all. Im so happy i did it because as i just said, no more cravings or addiction. Hope this helps someone, and i KNOW its hard not to binge but trust me its so worth it. Since then i havent binged on any of these things and im a big binger

[edxanon]

How to get out of Junk food

Well, junk foods fed on the fact you are craving what's in it, mostly fat and sugar. The best way is just to cut out them and replacing them with items that can still satisfy you, but won't fuck your body up as much as it would if you ate that junk. Plus your cholesterol, blood pressure and such will get lower, and the saturated fat you eat will also be cut out (not completely, but saturated fat is very obvious in junk food).

[edxanon]

THIS MIGHT MAKE YOU STOP BINGING FOREVER :

Link: https://m.youtube.co…h?v=WzIubswge2s
So I just finished listening to this book, “Brain over binge,” and I think I’m never going to binge again. I know it sounds crazy but this book made so much sense and I don’t think I will ever go back. I just thought I’d post this in case I could help anyone else with BED or Bulimia.
Please try it. (This specific post I pasted off of a forum, so I haven’t personally heard it yet)

[edxanon]

PSA : LAXATIVE ABUSE

just wanted to share something about laxative abuse. Please if you have never taken them, I discourage you 100% from ever trying them. They are the #1 thing in my life I regret the most ever doing. I could easily make this post into a narrative, & tell you my personal relationship with them, but I think it's more important to know the facts.

*im sure there are a lot of threads on here about it, but I just left work early from the extreme amount of pain I was in, it was SO FUCKING embarrassing. And it's really heavy on my heart right now, and in this vulnerable state... I'm going to be very passionate and real on this topic*

So here's what you need to know:

1. They don't help you lose fat weight 2. They dehydrate you & hurt your heart 3. Your body becomes dependent on them and you slowly but surely up your dosage to unreasonable amounts that CAN & WILL put you in the hospital or an early grave 4. There will be nights where your shitting water & throwing up at the same time 5. If you take them before bed, you can say goodbye to sleep because you'll be on the toilet all night 6. You will shit your pants once you can no longer control your bowels 7. Your toilet will be yuck, and you'll constantly have to clean it so your house mates don't catch on 8. A fart could easily turn into diarrhea (see #6) 9. It throws off your electrolytes 10. (Might just be me) eating foods high in fiber become the most painful meal of all time 11. It gets costly, especially if you're taking more than the suggested dose 12. Your butthole will burn hotter than a 1,000 suns in the desert 13. When your body becomes dependent on them, it will take a painful 3-4 days for your body to regulate itself (on day 3, I slipped and started taking them again, wish I would've stuck it out) 14. Usually when you throw up from them, it's just pure bile and that burns your throat like a mother fucker 15. You might spend nights sleeping next to your toilet & you will run out of toilet paper really fast 16. Getting a colostomy & having a poop bag attached to your body

So please, please, please, never fucking take them. I wish someone would've stopped me or warned me about all of this before I ever bought a bottle. You don't chose to have an eating disorder but you CAN chose not abuse laxatives. Please anyone who understands where I'm coming from or has anything to add, I urge you to comment below on why NOT to ever take them.