excalculus

[excalculus]

Do you ever see something bizarre and get hung up on not the thing itself so much as the way it clearly represents a chain of bad and/or baffling decisions?

I like to check out thrift/secondhand shops because sometimes there's legitimately useful or cool stuff there. Today... look. If you're going to donate your stuff, why would you include these particular items? Then if you're the store, why the hell would you turn around and try to sell them? Finally, if you're shopping and these are something you would otherwise want to purchase, no judgement on that, but why the fuck would you even consider buying a set of butt plugs from the thrift store

[excalculus]

Is the plural of TaqMan TaqMen?

[excalculus]

please stop writing "viscous" when you mean "vicious", it produces the weirdest mental images ever

[excalculus]

they need to invent the opposite of an nda called an fda where u have to tell everyone everything

[excalculus]

Today's aesthetic: when a cat decides it's going to make a very difficult or precise jump, spends several minutes examining the problem from all angles and warming up its muscles and minutely adjusting the positions of its paws and such, then proceeds to totally eat shit.

[excalculus]

pthbbbpbpbthp

[excalculus]

Costume Weathering & Distressing Guide, Part 2

[Apparently Tumblr’s new update messed up the ability to expand a post on mobile, so here’s the under-the-cut portion of the previous tutorial for those who can’t view it. The original post with the first half is here.]

First, here’s a basic video tutorial on distressing fabric (from @mangosirene​). This covers a lot of simple techniques such as tea dyeing, sanding, etc. that are good for creating an overall aged look on fabric. For many costumes, this is all you’ll need to create a great “lived-in” look.

Now, here are some of the specific techniques I use to create various effects on fabric (methods bolded for easy skimming):

Dirt

For fabrics that need to look well-used, there’s no substitute for real dirt. :) Need to get a white shirt really, truly dirty and stained? Use it as a rag to clean the windows of your house, wipe down your car, scrub the kitchen floor, etc. Rub the dirt into the fabric. It’ll stain beautifully! (As a bonus, your house and car will be nice and clean.)

For light-colored fabrics, I do a lot of tea dyeing to tone down the brightness. For more controlled “dirtying” of clothes, I put a concentrated mix of instant coffee and tea in a spray bottle and saturate the areas I want to come out darker. You can control the strength of your stain solution by adding more or less instant coffee/tea powder. (The stains will be permanent, but they may fade slightly with washing, so it may take multiple applications to get them as dark as you want.)

Here are some tank tops that I tea-dyed, then added fake sweat stains using instant coffee in a spray bottle:

Paint and dye are also great ways to add permanent dirt effects, especially for surface dirt like mud splatters or blood stains. Light spritzes of spray paint can create splotches of grime. For controlled splatter effects, dip the bristle tips of a a stiff paintbrush or toothbrush into acrylic or fabric paint, then scrape your finger along the bristles to flick tiny droplets of paint over the fabric. For soaked-in stains, mix acrylic paint or fabric dye with water to thin it, then drip or paint it on with a brush. (For more general staining rather than distinct spots, water down the paint and apply to wet fabric, then let dry.)

Here’s a white T-shirt that I tea-dyed, then attacked with thinned acrylic paint:

For permanent surface grit (especially useful on darker fabrics), you can apply dry dust, dirt, or fuller’s earth, and then seal it to the fabric with clear spray paint. For best results, add a very light layer of dust, spray, let dry, then add more layers. Paint won’t hold very heavy applications.

For temporary dirt effects that will brush or wash away easily (for a photoshoot or film scene, for example), I use… food! Ground cinnamon makes great loose dirt/dust, as does coarse flour. Paprika is good for rust stains. Ground mustard (the seed powder, not the liquid condiment) and corn meal are a bit coarser. Make sure these are applied dry, so they’re just sitting on the surface of the fabric, rather than rubbed deeply into the fibers. Otherwise they might be hard to clean off.

Here are some costumes that I “spiced up” for a dusty post-battle scene. (These costumes were vintage wool and couldn’t be washed daily, so I had to use materials that would brush off easily):

Wear and Tear

Fabric tends to wear out faster in areas with the most friction: Knees, elbows, hems that drag the ground, places that are rubbed by straps or bags. To age a costume, you can fade or wear down the surface of the fabric in those areas.

A bleach solution or dye remover can be used to selectively fade fabric. (Note: Concentrated bleach will break down fabric with repeated use, so if you’re starting with a white or dyeable fabric and want to age it before you make the costume, run it through a few strong bleach cycles first. The bleaching will damage the fibers and give the fabric a uniform weathered look.)

For controlled distressing, especially on heavier fabrics like denim or canvas, I do a lot of surface sanding. You can use sandpaper, a metal file, a cheese grater, a wire brush, or a leather rougher(advanced level; those things are vicious!) to rough up the surface of the fabric without tearing all the way through it.

If you need to put holes in the fabric – for example, a character with ripped jeans – it’s best to wear down the area you want to tear out first by sanding, rather than cutting the hole out with scissors. This makes it look more realistic (rough edges, loose threads) and also helps prevent the cut hole stretching and fraying until it’s too big.

Depending on the material your costume is made of, you can also use flame to singe edges or burn holes in the fabric. This can produce great visual effects for bullet holes or torn hems, though it does make the material brittle and easier to damage. This method works best with organic materials (cotton, linen, silk, wool) rather than most synthetics, which tend to liquefy (nylon) or combust in a spectacular ball of flame (acetate) when exposed to heat. TEST ON A SCRAP FIRST to make sure your costume will not turn into a pile of slag!

Non-Fabric Bits

Elements of the costume that aren’t made of fabric may need to be aged, as well. For metal pieces (buttons, buckles) or pieces with a lot of surface texture, try applying shoe polish or acrylic paint, then buffing with a cloth to remove the excess. Let some paint stick in the surface detail to look like tarnish or accumulated grime.

This antler knife was aged by brushing acrylic paint over the surface, then rubbing with a paper towel to remove the excess:

For plastic pieces that appear too smooth, you can scrape the surface with a wire brush or sandpaper to distress it. You can also apply a small amount of paint with a dry brush or wadded paper towel to add texture.

These molded plastic horns were dry brushed with acrylic paint to make them look more like aged ivory:

You can also paint first, and then distress the paint job by scraping, sanding, or painting chips or scratches in with metallic paint.

This paint was scraped with sandpaper to create surface scratches:

For decorated armor or pieces with relief, try adding some detail paint around the edges of the designs, then buff the paint with a paper towel or cloth. This will make the raised designs more visible, as well as making the piece appear more tarnished or aged.

For large pieces (armor, helmets) that need to show wear, you can also add surface texture into the paint itself. Coat the piece with paint, and while it’s still wet, sprinkle with dirt, makeup powder, ground rust, fuller’s earth, or any other dry media you want to add. Let it dry, then seal with clear matte spray paint.

These helmets were painted with a super matte acrylic paint, then dusted with powder pigments to create the dirt and rust effects:

Other Tips

A few things to keep in mind when you’re weathering a costume:

Don’t make your fabric unwashable. Ideally, your costume should look dirty, but smell clean. ;-) Even for outer clothing layers, you want to be able to clean the costume in case of accident (someone spills a drink on you, etc.). If you want your distressing to stay through repeated washing, be sure to use impermeable dyes and paints. Keep in mind that some distressing techniques (spray paint, et al.) may require delicate cycle or hand washing to preserve.

Don’t destroy the costume’s structural integrity. Shredding and sanding fabric can create realistic damage effects, but it will also shorten the lifespan of the material. Make sure you leave structural seams intact, and try to keep most of the damage on the surface rather than tearing huge holes through the fabric.

Organic materials break down over time. For permanent weathering, use inorganic materials like plaster, gravel dust, or fuller’s earth rather than organic materials like flour or corn starch, which can grow mold or attract insects in storage.

[excalculus]

It's about the definition of the word "take". Clearly directly killing, capturing, etc. an animal counts. Under the currently accepted interpretation, significantly changing the creature's habitat in a way that would be detrimental to them also counts. The argument being made is that because damaging habitat doesn't directly harm animals, it doesn't fall under the technical definition of the word "take", and that narrow definition is what should be used in interpreting the Endangered Species Act.

This is, of course, bullshit. Not to say that hunting wasn't a factor with the ivory-billed woodpecker, but they weren't ever targeted at scale for food, "pest control", or any of the other reasons animals tend to get hunted to extinction. It wasn't even a great auk situation where collectors finished off a rare species. In the end we lost them entirely because logging eliminated the old-growth forest with standing dead trees they relied on. The last known population of the largest woodpecker species in the United States was in one isolated tract of forest in Louisiana, and there hasn't been a confirmed sighting since that was logged in 1944.

On April 16th 2025 the US federal government has proposed to change the interpretation of the endangered species act so that it no longer protects habitat.

This is open for public comment until the end of May 19th. Please comment and make your voice heard.

Wildlife need their habitat. If the ESA redefines harm so that habitat is no longer protected, the implications for wildlife would be catastrophic.

[excalculus]

I know you wanted me away But I am called to be the first Pope from the USA I heard that there's a special place where God talks directly to me every time I pray

I'm having holy dreams, of ruling the Holy See Hear Santa Monica, her son is calling me Won't make the bishops proud, the USCCB Will see their bro in Christ, I know they're gonna scream

"God, what will you do? You once were our boy, then you went to Peru," oh Fathers I'm on the balcony In my vestments, they elected me as the

[excalculus]

Do you guys want to see the funniest $2 I've ever spent?

I sadly haven't been able to turn up the formulation for Restorative Blood Purifier. Based on what I have found though, it was likely either ye olde mix of many controlled substances... or basically root beer. Honestly unsure which option would be worse.

[excalculus]

We were talking about hoarding materials at work because there's a good chance the supply chain is about to make like it's 2021. Boss meant to say get 20 liters' worth of a certain media formulation in case of emergency, but verbally typoed it to 20 microliters.

Someone asked him if he said that right.

He said yes.

Chaos.

Highlights include:

"I see we're really going in on the miniaturization!"

"-CELL CULTURE FOR ANTS???"

"Just a little taste, so you can remember what you used to have-"

[excalculus]

REBLOG IF THIS RELATES TO YOU:

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

[excalculus]

Glass Snakes

Eicher Glass on Etsy

[excalculus]

that green sheen on a purple background for the new version looks an awful lot like crystal violet. Surely there's other stuff going on but if it has anything to do with the thing I tried to stain bacteria and succeeded at staining my hands, clothes, etc. with back in the day that's very funny.

The Noodlers thing pisses me off so much because as someone who works in wet lab where bleach and alcohol regularly go everywhere, I'm one of what's probably a relatively small group of people who do need and benefit from the properties of the bulletproof inks in daily use. There are alternatives and I'm sure I'll find at least basic black, blue, and so on that I like but augh.

Ngl i prefer the 2016 version purple on the right.

[excalculus]

The entirety of Massachusetts

Submitted by Anonymous

[excalculus]

I'm still working on finishing the quilt (banished cat to bathroom jail and got the basting done) but I also have a bunch of side projects/experiments going at any given time. Good news, I may have found a way to make a thing I've been thinking about for a while. Bad news, it's bead crochet with 11/0 seed beads, upholstery thread, and a 0.75mm hook. It's very possible I'll give up or get distracted before getting anywhere even if this test piece works perfectly, but if I don't this might be what finally destroys my eyesight and/or gives me carpal tunnel.

[excalculus]