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Currently in my Colin Farrell & Charlie Hunnam era because I rewatched The Gentlemen two months ago and my brain got infected :)

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COLIN FARRELL in Total Recall (2012)

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I have done zero writing so far today so have this quick little thing.

Alex calling Bear Joe.

Because most people call him Bear. And we know that Lena called him Joseph. And probably the officers at work are just going to call him Graves. And I am going to give you a personal headcanon that Bear's dad used to call him Joey (maybe his dad was Joseph, too, and it was a way to differentiate them or maybe he was just that much of an asshole that he wanted to give his son as childish a nickname as he could manage). But no one calls him Joe.

Enter Alex.

(Side note, Alex is the only person in existence who could get away with calling Bear Joey again and live to tell the tale)

When Alex and Bear start sleeping together, Alex is just trying to push the boundaries of this whole new dynamic (joke's on him- they have no boundaries when it comes to each other). And it's not as if he could really give him a pet name like you might with your partner normally. But this is just a different version of Bear's first name. That no one else uses. He can definitely get away with this. Everyone will probably just assume that it's them being Weird about each other again anyway.

Turns out Bear likes it way more than he ever thought he would. There's not a lot he can give Alex, he knows that. Mostly just sneaking around and stolen moments and probably a broken heart at the end of it. But he can give him this. A name that no one else uses. A part of him that no one else gets. Something special that's just theirs.

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Ohhh I love this shot so much.

The lights illuminate Loki’s half of the frame and form a glowing halo above him. Bartleby’s half of the frame is darker, with only a single small light in the background. Loki is still an angel, still a child of god, still faithful. Bartleby’s light has dimmed, his halo is gone, he’s dark with anger, but still holding an inkling of faith; a lone bulb hiding in the background. Bartleby stands behind a line of steel, a sturdy divide between him and Loki, a cold and solid new resolution.

“You sound like the morning star.”

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Here's something for shits and giggles y'all

Visit @8-rae-rae-8 and @quality-on-a-patch-of-awesome for hurt/no comfort

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The gif of Bear shoving Alex against the wall will always be important to me

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Context: He’s upset that he ran out of cigs. A cute kid on the frosty mountains gave him a lollipop to warm him up! :-)

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if you told vin diesel fast and the furious you were gay he'd be like "Some people like driving stick…some people like driving automatic…what matters is you cross the finish line.." and then he'd rev up a dodge challenger and drive through a building and kill 16 people

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BIG OUCH

It's literally what Rip had told Buddha before leaving the team. That he have family, while Rip and Bear don't, that's why Bear took Rip's place, not Buddha

And once again, Bear has to watch people he cares about leave him alone :)

We don't talk enough about how Buddha and Jackie must feel knowing Lena died in their house

RAAAAAAAH IT WAS ON OF THE FIRST THINGS I THOUGHT AFTER THE FINALE ISTG

Because I'm 90% sure Bear would hate him. Their friendship was already craking at the seams in the second season, and if they had found out it was the same sleeping agent that killed Rip, Bear would be lividddd. 'Cause what do you mean your wife suspected there would be a hunt for the whole team and you just ignored her??? It was your bullet not Lena's! (Read in Bear's voice)

And Jackie could feel the most guilt, I think. This was her house, she had to open the door. But she was busy in the kitchen and asked... Lena. And she met the killer alone. She struggled, managed to take the gun and then she killed a human. A young girl. She probably wasn't even much older than her daughter. And Jackie had to look at her lifeless body, mindlessly clutching a pistol in her hand. She didn't even remembered about that first shot she heard.

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Buddha wanted to avenge Rip so fiercely too... but he would've quit for the sake of his family...

We don't talk enough about how Buddha and Jackie must feel knowing Lena died in their house

RAAAAAAAH IT WAS ON OF THE FIRST THINGS I THOUGHT AFTER THE FINALE ISTG

Because I'm 90% sure Bear would hate him. Their friendship was already craking at the seams in the second season, and if they had found out it was the same sleeping agent that killed Rip, Bear would be lividddd. 'Cause what do you mean your wife suspected there would be a hunt for the whole team and you just ignored her??? It was your bullet not Lena's! (Read in Bear's voice)

And Jackie could feel the most guilt, I think. This was her house, she had to open the door. But she was busy in the kitchen and asked... Lena. And she met the killer alone. She struggled, managed to take the gun and then she killed a human. A young girl. She probably wasn't even much older than her daughter. And Jackie had to look at her lifeless body, mindlessly clutching a pistol in her hand. She didn't even remembered about that first shot she heard.

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Damocles - Sleep Token

What if I can't get up and stand tall? What if the diamond days are all gone And who will I be when thе empire falls? Wake up alonе and I'll be forgotten

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What stops me from putting Smiling Jackals in my Six punk band au playlist

Yes, they're not punk, but vibes are vibing, man. And I love looking at young Barry on the cover

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What about Bear's intimacy issues. Lena doesn't really take the initiative in this regard (well, at least with him, huh?), for her sex is either a way to conceive a child, which she is certainly obsessed with, or a marital obligation. So Bear begins to feel guilty for his own desire. He doesn't want to admit that sometimes he just needs this connection as a way to distract himself from problems, to feel that he's not alone. A stress relief. But no, sex should be an expression of love, something sublime and intimate between two people who love each other

Of course, his religious beliefs also play a role, making him think that he should feel different, think different, be different

Caulder trying not to rush into anything with Bear because he wants something real, not based off sex for the first time in a long time. The longer he pushes that step away, the more he feels Bear watching him. Rather than seeing the slight concern in his eyes, he thinks he needs to get over that anxiety now before Bear leaves him.

He deserved better than a relationship without sex, so Alex gave it to him and dealt with the way his skin crawled after—like he'd done something wrong

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Now, that made me think of my punk au, because where's rock — there's drugs, and drugs is our favorite Alex's theme to play around

Imagine the band finally starts making enough money to break even. It's not much, but those first successes go straight to your head, especially when you're young and full of energy to chase dreams and create new one riding that ecstatic high. At first it's parties with friends, which turn into drunk nights with any friendly faces around, which then spiral into full weeks of binge drinking. And somewhere in that crowd of accidental barmates those kind enough souls are found to lure him in. Just to try, to broaden horizons, y'know — classic.

It's all fun and exciting at first, until Alex's gaze starts to be that one of a wild animal's, that might either lunge at you any second or bolt and hide in its den, cutting itself off from the whole damn world. He stares at them like they're objects. Or maybe he's staring right through them?

He's smart enough to keep smiling and nodding along, while his blue eyes dart around nervously. Wonder how much they'd give for Chase's phone at a pawnshop? There's a wristwatch somewhere in that pile of magazines, he remembers — Armin takes his off because he doesn't like the sensation when playing.

Well, it's just friends helping friends, right? He just needs to get what he needs.

Several expensive things going missing is the last straw when they realize what exactly the problem was — those nights had been fun, but the rest of them had the restraint to stop and places to go once they were done for the night. What did Alex have? A silent apartment he was going into debt to keep? Once the band went home, there was nothing else for Alex but the drinks and the drugs he'd gotten offered—it held off his appetite when there was no food to be found.

Alex knows how to deny and change the subject, but the more they push, the more he just needs to find that one suspicious group at that bar that would always give him one more drink, one more hit, another pill, something. It makes his head spin with anger when they don't let him get the things he needs- his lies don't fucking work anymore when his hands shake from the lack of whatever he's gotten hooked on that time, sweat beads at his forehead and he can't stop the way his teeth keep chattering.

He functioned well enough, he doesn't need to stop, there's no fucking time. He's never missed a gig, he cooks for them when he has the extra cash, he's there for them, isn't he? So what's the point of calling him out like this? What's the point of the sad looking eyes staring at him? They aren't even angry, at least they should be pissed.

There isn't even anywhere to go because they've finally cornered him like an animal, but he can't lunge for them to try to escape because someone will grab him by the scruff before he's even a few steps forward.

He can try to fight it, hide his hands and calm down, but he can't help the way he glances at them in search for something to take. And god, when it's threatened to stop paying him or kick him out of the band, he almost lets them.

Getting clean sounds far worse than being left in the dirt for a solid few minutes. Hell, days. He could find something to sell, surely. They clearly don't care enough if they don't give him what he needs.

It's the way Bear shoves him against the wall, practically strangling him while giving him an ultimatum that makes him take a second to weigh his options — He'll give Alex what he needs, whatever it takes, but he will get clean. Something about harm reduction and weaning him off whatever he's been stealing their shit to get high off of. Something about not wanting his best friend dying that way, from a roofied drink or a laced pill.

It's that, or get kicked out of the band and let everything spiral from there. Lose his apartment, lose his income, lose his friends. The idea of another high almost makes him choose the worse of the two, uncaring what would happen to him, till Bear pressed harder against his windpipe and promised he'd kill him before the substances did.

Idk I just started yapping and didn't stop man

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We don't talk enough about how Buddha and Jackie must feel knowing Lena died in their house

RAAAAAAAH IT WAS ON OF THE FIRST THINGS I THOUGHT AFTER THE FINALE ISTG

Because I'm 90% sure Bear would hate him. Their friendship was already craking at the seams in the second season, and if they had found out it was the same sleeping agent that killed Rip, Bear would be lividddd. 'Cause what do you mean your wife suspected there would be a hunt for the whole team and you just ignored her??? It was your bullet not Lena's! (Read in Bear's voice)

And Jackie could feel the most guilt, I think. This was her house, she had to open the door. But she was busy in the kitchen and asked... Lena. And she met the killer alone. She struggled, managed to take the gun and then she killed a human. A young girl. She probably wasn't even much older than her daughter. And Jackie had to look at her lifeless body, mindlessly clutching a pistol in her hand. She didn't even remembered about that first shot she heard.

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Thought about Caves,,

Yes yes yes love it

Kinda works both ways? Like Alex is in a rush — stumbling over his mistakes, wrong words, overthinking — but actively trying to reach out. And Bear is too hesitant, too full of guilt, so afraid of what this thing between them might mean and of changes that it might bring to their lifes — he's barely moving. As soon as he takes one step, new doubts overwhelm him again, and he stumbles in place