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being a buddie fan is like watching a cake being made. Tim and his fellow writers are baking up a storm in the kitchen. and you’re just watching. they have all these ingredients, and they’re putting them in a bowl and mixing it up. and you can see it all happening. you can smell it baking when it’s in the oven. you watch as they whip up the frosting and decorate that in good old roy g biv. They slide that shit right in front of you. it smells delicious. it looks gorgeous. and right on top in big piped on letters is the word ‘Cake’.

Like any person would, you assume it’s cake because what else would it fucking be?

but you got tim minear in his little chefs hat, going “now i won’t say this is a cake or not. if you choose to see it as a cake, i’m all here for it. i will say that, yes, i did intend to make a cake, but is it a cake? that’s up for interpretation”.

and you got oliver stark, with his pr trained smile on, next to you going “i don’t bake, so i can’t tell you if this cake or not, but i can totally understand why you’d think it’s cake. and if it is cake? i’m all here for it, as long as it’s a good cake”.

and then you got ryan guzman across from you going “cake? idk. how about this granola bar i got from by pocket?”

and then when you ask to eat the cake, tim comes over with a hammer smashes the shit out of it and then leaves behind a messy ass kitchen, and oliver has disappeared into the mountains and ryan is still across from you taking about fucking granola. and the fucking peanut gallery is behind you telling you there never was any cake in the first place, and that the “real cake” is the bowl with left over frosting soaking in dish water in the sink.

and yk what? you’re gonna sit back down in that kitchen come september, and watch them bake that cake again using those same ingredients that they set out in plain view, that have been sitting there for years, and hope they don’t fuck it up this time.

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god loves you, but not enough to save you…

(first *finished* procreate drawing in the books 🫣 i’m still working out the kinks and figuring out stuff, but i’m decently pleased with the final product. Anyway, here is some catholic guilt Eddie Diaz for you!)

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The 118 + loved ones in ambulances

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mwahhhhhh💕

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no matter how this plays out, there is no un-fucking what tim fucked up. if that script leak was real, not seeing the body, and those comments about the government still holding Bobby’s remains lead to a big reveal in the finale that he’s still alive, or if Bobby is very much dead, there is no fixing what was broken.

if he’s dead, you killed off a main character in the worst way possible, with his death and funeral being reduced to the last 5 minutes of the episode, because somehow killing off a main for the first time in 8 seasons is something you rush into the last few minutes of an episode. if he’s dead, you killed off a character whose actor didn’t want to leave, and you broke the trust of your cast because you fired their friend for no good reason. if he’s really dead, you sound so incredibly stupid when you say it’s for realism purposes, considering this show is the same one with bee-nados and injuries that completely heal in two weeks. if he’s dead, you completely sidelined his relationship with Eddie, a main character, who didn’t get to say goodbye to a father figure and mentor, whose reaction was off-screen, and who only showed up 45 minutes into the episode. if he’s dead, you had the worst send-off for his character in history, in which only two characters were given the space to substantially react and grieve his passing. If he’s dead, you’ve completely altered the show forever for no good reason, threw away what made it special in the first place, and basically tanked your viewership.

if he’s alive, you’ve committed emotional terrorism against your audience. if he’s alive, you’ve further alienated a dedicated and loyal fanbase that talked about your show all the time, and who carved out time to watch live (for some that meant staying up until the early AM). if he’s alive, there’s no walking back how poorly Eddie was treated. if he’s alive, there’s no erasing the fact that only two characters actually got to have big reactions to someone they thought was dead, or that you gave more screen time to the bigoted ex-captain to grieve Bobby than an actual main character. if he’s alive, you’ve done such a piss poor job of keeping up the momentum and giving weight to the tragedy of Bobby’s apparent passing, that people are still gonna underwhelmed by the big reveal. if he’s alive you halted storylines that have been building all season for no reason, but to feed some fantasy or maybe just your ego.

either way, you fucked up big time, and there’s no world where the fans ever forgive and forget what happened.

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I know people wanted Eddie to yell at Helena (me included, but that was mostly because I was projecting my own desire to yell at her) and I think a lot of us came out of 8x13 with the consensus that it was in character for Eddie to confront his mom in the way he did.

And I’m thinking more and more about it, and it also showed so much growth on his part. Because he has yelled at his parents in the past (“Eddie Begin”) and nothing really came of it because the emotions were way (understandably) too high. Now though, he didn’t yell at her (even if she more than deserved it, as did Ramon btw), instead he marched into the house confidently, armed with a bitchy comment because he’s Eddie and no one does perfectly timed petty comebacks quite like him, and was calm and gentle towards Helena.

How does this show growth? Eddie is already generally a very level-headed, kind, and gentle person, which is why the way he confronted Helena was in character for him. However, the growth comes in not letting his mother manipulate him, not letting her guilt trip him, and instead setting clear boundaries and recognizing how harmful she and Ramon have been to Chris and Eddie.

Helena is an emotionally manipulative person, and Ramon is right there with her. Ever since they took Chris, they have been using Eddie’s emotions, pain, trauma, mistakes, etc. (god I HATE the Diaz parents so much). They’ve used Eddie’s insecurities and Christopher’s hurt to keep them apart. It shows tremendous growth that Eddie was able to just blow past Helena’s attempts to manipulate him into not getting his son back instead of allowing her barbs to ferment and cause even more self-doubt—as a continuation of the self-love things that’s been going on since 8x06.

This whole episode was about Eddie recognizing that his parents were perpetuating the same toxic cycles for Chris as they did with Eddie. He never wanted to be like his parents. He wanted to break the cycle. And he did. This episode was him finally allowing himself to admit “I’m his father. I’m what’s best for him. And these people who stole my childhood from me don’t get to steal my kid and steal his childhood too.” This was him saying “You hurt me, and you were hurting my kid, and you don’t get to do that anymore.”

Even though I think Helena and Ramon deserve so much worse and deserve to be cut off from Eddie and Chris, I don’t Eddie would do that (love and family are so very complicated). But I do think it was pretty powerful for him to see the cruelty she and Ramon threw at him and didn’t rise to the bait. He gave her kindness in return and showed her that he was the bigger person, all the while admitting that he and Chris don’t need either of them.

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Me last month:

Ryan today:

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No, no, no, I need you to understand.

The 118 and Co. is one big family unit, right? But they each have their own little families they go home to at the end of the day (or shift technically). Hen has Karen, Mara, and Denny. Bobby and Athena have each other and the whole Grant-Nash clan. Maddie and Chimney have Jee-Yun and their future baby.

And Buck and Eddie? They have their family unit with Chris.

Sure, Buck is incredibly close with all of the 118, but they all have people to go home to. Buck doesn’t have that - except he does, just not in the traditional sense.

When he needs comfort, an ear to listen, and a safe space, Buck goes to Eddie, and vice versa. It’s been established since season 3 that the Buckley-Diaz’s are a family unit (insert “Photograph” by Ed Sheeran).

Eddie possibly moving away has the potential to wack Buck upside the head with the realization that the family and the love and the belonging that he’s been searching for in people like Abby, Ali, Taylor, Natalia, and T*mmy, has been right in front of him the entire time. The pieces are all right there for Buck to realize “Oh. It’s been Eddie this entire time.”

And Eddie is going to recognize that he was never actually alone in all this. That role he’s been trying to fill in his life and in Christopher’s with Ana and Marisol, has already been filled, long before they came around. Buck is right there, helping Eddie through this, despite the fact that’s it breaking his heart. Eddie is going to realize “Oh. It’s always been Buck.”

The stars are aligning, dominos are falling, puzzle pieces are clicking into place, or whatever metaphor you want to use, on Buddie canon. They’re building up to it before our very eyes. Like it’s actually happening.

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right in front of Charlie's leg wound?

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EDDIE DIAZ 5.01 | 7.04 | 7.06

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Like father, like son. 9-1-1, S02E04 &S08E06

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#I can't wait for them to date, it's gonna be hilarious

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BT largely parallels BuckAbby. They have the same age/experience gap, Buck was much more invested in both relationships than either of his respective partners, even Buck confirmed that he viewed both relationships as transformative for him (one being his first serious relationship and the other being his first queer relationship). And both involve Buck watching the other person walk away from him.

Now, in the first episode after Abby leaves, Buck walks into the fire station and who does he see? Oh, yeah, a half-naked Eddie Diaz.

After t*mmy breaks up with Buck, where does Buck go? He goes to Eddie’s house and sees a half-naked Eddie Diaz waiting for him.

There’s a every chance I’m reading too much into this lol, but I’m having fun. Plus, we weren’t reading too much into it when clocked that Buck was wearing break-up green in those 8x06 stills, so who knows.

(also considering they are subtly paying homage to Buddie’s greatest hits - The Well and The Lightning Strike so far - I wonder if that NDE we’ve been theorizing about is going to be reminiscent of the grenade in the ambulance that started their friendship in the first place? Perhaps we’ll get them trapped in a dangerous place together, forced to reevaluate their conceptions of their relationship and their feelings for each other?)

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And if I say that Buck and Eddie have switched places from where they were in s7? Eddie asked Marisol to move in with him before he said I love you, then something about Marisol’s past came up that made Eddie spiral, and then he reflected and asked her to move out. At the end of s7, a formative person in Eddie’s life (Shannon) came back in the form of Kim, which ultimately ended with Eddie and Marisol breaking up, and Eddie being at a very low point in his life, and he turned to Buck for help. Meanwhile, Buck just discovered a new part of himself, his bisexuality, and was in a content place regarding his identity.

In S8, a formative person from Buck’s past (Abby) is brought up as a piece of Tommy’s past that sends Buck spiraling. After some time to settle with it, Buck impulsively decides to ask Tommy to move in with him before they said I love you. Tommy says no and breaks up with Buck, leaving Buck in the first real low place in a while. While Eddie is trying to find out who he is, and what he wants, and maybe try to let himself be happy, Buck is heartbroken and goes to Eddie for comfort - which Eddie readily gives.

As for what this means? Well, I think it means Buck has already figured out his identity, but he has the space to reflect on why his past relationships haven’t worked out. As for Eddie, he’s getting what Buck got last season, an arc in which he can discover and/or accept his sexuality. Buck and Eddie have been hurdling towards each other since they met, but they keep missing each other because something wasn’t aligned right - they were with other people, the timing wasn’t right, they thought they were straight, etc. Now they’re being given the ingredients to figure themselves out and what, or who, they want. But in true 911 fashion, I don’t think they’ll truly realize what they feel for one another until something pushes them to open their eyes. That something big, of course, being an NDE - whether it’s Buck, Eddie, or both - that puts everything into focus.

The narrative is telling us over and over again that they’re setting Buddie up (and that they’ve been setting it up for a while) and while I’m not 100% sure how they’re going to do it, I know that it is going to happen.

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i haven’t been on here in a while but uh we won so hard tonight

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please he's a dork