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[furbywrites]

I'd Never Let You Go Pt. 2

Okay, so I had writers block for what felt like ages, but this chapter came to me so easily. It felt nice. Next chapter we get to meet Ellie! Yay! Once again, feedback/constructive criticism is welcome! :D

Ao3

I could hear him release a deep sigh, but he continued to walk with me. "You're real quiet, ya' know that?" he huffed, sounding almost annoyed. I frowned but said nothing. "Jus' wanna talk is all. Ya' don't gotta run from me."

My mouth opened, gaze still fixed steadily on my own boots, but no words would come. Anxiety constricted my throat, allowing only a pathetic squeak to pass my lips.

Why couldn't I be normal? I've seen plenty of people talk to Joel, smile at Joel, flirt with Joel. Sure he ignored most of them, giving a tight lipped smile and a polite, "Pardon me," before extracting himself from the conversation. At least they had tried, had been capable of even saying one word.

Some part of my brain felt broken at times, especially when it came to communication. Sometimes I'd go so long without speaking a single word, that when I finally managed, my voice sounded more like the croaking of a frog than that of a human.

Right now, with Joel by my side, keeping pace with my aimless steps, I tried. My mouth opened, gaping like a fish seeking water, but nothing but a frustrated grunt was to be heard. I couldn't do it. Something so simple for everyone around me, and I couldn't do it.

I could feel the tears finally overflow, as I sniffled loudly. A quick glance in Joel's direction showed his eyes widening in...what? Shock? I never was very good at reading people. It seemed an accurate guess though.

A hand, heavy and warm, placed itself upon my shoulder, and suddenly he was in front of me, standing, and we weren't walking anymore.

"I didn't mean to scare you, darlin'." His eyes, so big and brown and soft. I only realized I was looking into them when I felt myself getting lost in his gaze. Quickly, my eyes moved to his shoulder, where they usually ended up in the unforeseen circumstance of conversation.

I didn't necessarily have an issue with eye contact, quite the opposite. I overcompensated. Stared unfalteringly. People said it was unnerving, and so I stopped. Humiliated at yet again breaking some unknown social cue I did not inherently know.

I did not want to make Joel, the man of my fascinations, of my wandering mind, of my daydreams, unnerved. So, his shoulder seemed a good place to look.

With his eyes no longer a distraction, my mind instead focused on his hand upon my shoulder. It felt...nice. Surprisingly so. I had no one in Jackson I was close to. No one to touch. Perhaps it was getting to me, because just the warmth of his hand through my sweater had thoughts of burying my head into his chest running amok in my head.

I swallowed thickly, mind racing, and with a sharp inhale I brought myself back to the present moment. Sometimes I got lost in my head. A bad habit.

I didn't know how to convey without words that he hadn't scared me. Despite his reputation, and boy did he have one, he wasn't scary, at least not to me. Perhaps it was his interactions with Ellie I constantly observed from afar. But he seemed so soft in those moments, so kind.

I simply placed my hand upon his, giving a slight squeeze, and a tight lipped smile. Hoping he would understand. Again, I found myself getting lost, but not in my head, instead at the feeling of his rough skin on mine. A violent shiver went through me at the contact. Yes, clearly touch starved. The thought made me frown.

Before I could comprehend it, his hand was gone, being replaced by something heavy around my shoulders. His jacket? Had I been stuck in my head so long I'd missed something important?

Finally I looked into his eyes once more. My confusion must have been evident, because he simply huffed at my expression.

"You were shiverin', looked cold." He spoke so matter-of-factly, assuredly, despite being wrong. I wasn't cold, though it's not as though I could voice this to him, not that I would. It was a kind gesture, and his eyes looked so soft as he gazed at me, I found myself smiling, tears long forgotten.

He mirrored my smile, though much more subdued. The crows feet at the corners of his eyes crinkled slightly. Cute. I blushed again at the thought.

"You never finished eating. Ya' must still be hungry?"

Eyes still locked on his, I nodded dumbly, currently distracted with the scent coming from his jacket. How did I only just notice? Did he smell this good? It couldn't just be the jacket. My face felt like it was on fire. Why couldn't I focus?

"Come on then, you can sit with me an' Ellie." His hand on my shoulder again, this time gently turning me around, leading me back to the canteen. "She wanted to meet ya' anyway."

[furbywrites]

I'd Never Let You Go Pt. 1

So, this is my first fanfic. It's pretty rough. Constructive criticism welcome :)

Ao3

At the sudden reappearance of Joel and Ellie in Jackson, a lonely resident becomes enamored with the stoic man. Lacking social skills, they look from afar, thinking themself subtle in their admiration. Unbeknownst to them, Joel has also been admiring from afar, feeling just as incapable of forming any new emotional connection, but drawn to them regardless.

There were new arrivals in Jackson. Not entirely unusual; it was more so their initial dramatic entrance that caught my attention. They came, they left, and now they were back again. Normally I wouldn’t pay much attention, except for the fact that they seemed like such a mismatched pair. A younger girl and an old man, not father and daughter like I, and most others had assumed.

She was energetic, extroverted, and although hesitant at first, settled in nicely. The man was another story entirely. He kept to himself, made little conversation with anyone other than the girl, and Tommy of course. Estranged brothers from what I had gathered. I didn’t know Tommy well enough to delve into his family history. We spoke in passing, and even then very little. 

I wasn’t known for being talkative. This life has taught me that being quiet and keeping your head down helped things go smoothly. I’d been in Jackson for one year, and had no friends to speak of. Secluding myself was far too easy, especially in a world like this. Maybe that’s why I found myself so interested in him. We seemed so alike, but so different at the same time. Where he commanded respect with his presence alone, I blended into the scenery like a shadow.

I sat in the mess hall, attempting to discreetly take a peek from under my lashes. Joel Miller. He was scowling at his plate of food, until the girl, Ellie, read something from a book gripped in her hand. It was a subtle but noticeable uptick of his mouth, his guard coming down momentarily as he huffed a laugh with a shake of his head. It was these moments, a glimpse at the man beneath the mask, that continuously peaked my interest.

I gathered from the current town gossip that they had been through hell and back together. They must have an unbreakable bond if so. I felt almost envious of their relationship. No, not almost, I was.  

Joel was big, strong, and capable. Everything the people I survived with prior to Jackson hadn’t been. They had felt like a weight I carried on my shoulders, dragging me down, until eventually I had left to be on my own. I wish I could say it was easier. Some spiteful part of me wanted life to be easier without them, but going solo was far worse.

I was on death's door when a patrol group from Jackson had found me. The tips of my fingers frostbitten, feet numb and burning, stomach empty. I was dying. The worst part is, I could have gone back to my old group, they no doubt would have accepted me with open arms. But god, I was so humiliated at my own failure. I felt death was better than facing them again.

My eyes stung with oncoming tears at the memory, embarrassment heating my cheeks. The food before me suddenly looked less appealing, but I continued to eat it anyway. I looked once more towards Joel, glancing away hastily when we made eye contact. Not so subtle I guess.

His stare felt like it was burning me, somehow making the blush on my cheeks glow brighter all of his own accord. I took another glance, like gazing at him alone was somehow addictive. Taking in his uneven scruff, graying hair, soft brown eyes. One more look before I go. 

His gaze was unwavering. I could feel my heart pitter patter in my chest, the blush spreading to my ears. I stood quickly, in such a rush to leave the suddenly claustrophobic room. I left my food on the table and hurried out the door of the mess hall.

How humiliating. I can’t even make eye contact with him. A foolish fascination, a childish crush, turning me into a blubbering mess. I continued onwards, the crunch of dirt under my boots a welcome distraction, until the sound of another pair fast approaching became apparent.

“'scuse me.” 

My eyes widened, feeling as though they might pop out of my head and roll away. Much like I wished I could drop to the ground and roll away from this current situation. 

Joel had followed me.

I swallowed thickly, kept my head down and continued walking. I could hear him grunt in annoyance as he quickened his steps to catch up with me. Now walking side by side, I dared to look in his direction. “Would ya’ slow down for a minute?” he asked gruffly, brows furrowed heavily. 

Any normal person might. I am not normal. Most attempts at conversation by an average resident of Jackson caused anxiety to course through my body as though one of the infected were in front of me. With Joel? It was like my brain had turned off completely. 

I hastened my steps, turned my head to stare directly at the ground, watching my boots kick up dirt. I wasn’t even sure which direction I was walking in anymore. I just knew staying near him was a bad idea. I would say something stupid, or god forbid do something stupid.

I could hear him release a deep sigh, but he continued to walk with me. "You're real quiet, ya' know that?" he huffed, sounding almost annoyed. I frowned but said nothing. "Jus' wanna talk is all. Ya' don't gotta run from me."

[furbywrites]

i wanna write a modern au fic for joel x reader with fake txts and stuff but i am stumped bc how would this man txt?? what would he say???? T_T

[furbywrites]

I should have probably made the read gender neutral now that I think about it ^^'

[furbywrites]

I really enjoyed writing the first part of my fic. Here's hoping that making this blog will help give me a reason to continue writing on a regular basis :)

[furbywrites]

I'd Never Let You Go Pt. 1

So, this is my first fanfic. It's pretty rough. Constructive criticism welcome :)

Ao3

At the sudden reappearance of Joel and Ellie in Jackson, a lonely resident becomes enamored with the stoic man. Lacking social skills, they look from afar, thinking themself subtle in their admiration. Unbeknownst to them, Joel has also been admiring from afar, feeling just as incapable of forming any new emotional connection, but drawn to them regardless.

There were new arrivals in Jackson. Not entirely unusual; it was more so their initial dramatic entrance that caught my attention. They came, they left, and now they were back again. Normally I wouldn’t pay much attention, except for the fact that they seemed like such a mismatched pair. A younger girl and an old man, not father and daughter like I, and most others had assumed.

She was energetic, extroverted, and although hesitant at first, settled in nicely. The man was another story entirely. He kept to himself, made little conversation with anyone other than the girl, and Tommy of course. Estranged brothers from what I had gathered. I didn’t know Tommy well enough to delve into his family history. We spoke in passing, and even then very little. 

I wasn’t known for being talkative. This life has taught me that being quiet and keeping your head down helped things go smoothly. I’d been in Jackson for one year, and had no friends to speak of. Secluding myself was far too easy, especially in a world like this. Maybe that’s why I found myself so interested in him. We seemed so alike, but so different at the same time. Where he commanded respect with his presence alone, I blended into the scenery like a shadow.

I sat in the mess hall, attempting to discreetly take a peek from under my lashes. Joel Miller. He was scowling at his plate of food, until the girl, Ellie, read something from a book gripped in her hand. It was a subtle but noticeable uptick of his mouth, his guard coming down momentarily as he huffed a laugh with a shake of his head. It was these moments, a glimpse at the man beneath the mask, that continuously peaked my interest.

I gathered from the current town gossip that they had been through hell and back together. They must have an unbreakable bond if so. I felt almost envious of their relationship. No, not almost, I was.  

Joel was big, strong, and capable. Everything the people I survived with prior to Jackson hadn’t been. They had felt like a weight I carried on my shoulders, dragging me down, until eventually I had left to be on my own. I wish I could say it was easier. Some spiteful part of me wanted life to be easier without them, but going solo was far worse.

I was on death's door when a patrol group from Jackson had found me. The tips of my fingers frostbitten, feet numb and burning, stomach empty. I was dying. The worst part is, I could have gone back to my old group, they no doubt would have accepted me with open arms. But god, I was so humiliated at my own failure. I felt death was better than facing them again.

My eyes stung with oncoming tears at the memory, embarrassment heating my cheeks. The food before me suddenly looked less appealing, but I continued to eat it anyway. I looked once more towards Joel, glancing away hastily when we made eye contact. Not so subtle I guess.

His stare felt like it was burning me, somehow making the blush on my cheeks glow brighter all of his own accord. I took another glance, like gazing at him alone was somehow addictive. Taking in his uneven scruff, graying hair, soft brown eyes. One more look before I go. 

His gaze was unwavering. I could feel my heart pitter patter in my chest, the blush spreading to my ears. I stood quickly, in such a rush to leave the suddenly claustrophobic room. I left my food on the table and hurried out the door of the mess hall.

How humiliating. I can’t even make eye contact with him. A foolish fascination, a childish crush, turning me into a blubbering mess. I continued onwards, the crunch of dirt under my boots a welcome distraction, until the sound of another pair fast approaching became apparent.

“'scuse me.” 

My eyes widened, feeling as though they might pop out of my head and roll away. Much like I wished I could drop to the ground and roll away from this current situation. 

Joel had followed me.

I swallowed thickly, kept my head down and continued walking. I could hear him grunt in annoyance as he quickened his steps to catch up with me. Now walking side by side, I dared to look in his direction. “Would ya’ slow down for a minute?” he asked gruffly, brows furrowed heavily. 

Any normal person might. I am not normal. Most attempts at conversation by an average resident of Jackson caused anxiety to course through my body as though one of the infected were in front of me. With Joel? It was like my brain had turned off completely. 

I hastened my steps, turned my head to stare directly at the ground, watching my boots kick up dirt. I wasn’t even sure which direction I was walking in anymore. I just knew staying near him was a bad idea. I would say something stupid, or god forbid do something stupid.

I could hear him release a deep sigh, but he continued to walk with me. "You're real quiet, ya' know that?" he huffed, sounding almost annoyed. I frowned but said nothing. "Jus' wanna talk is all. Ya' don't gotta run from me."