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graciela-en-chile-blog · 8 years

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It’s been a few weeks since my last post, but I have been living and loving the “live now, write later” mentality, occasionally jotting down observations or emotions in my iPhone notepad. I have been existing intently wherever I am in that moment, which is something I can honestly say I have never done before. No thoughts that enable me to stray away from what life is offering me. My standard feelings of anxiety have not been at all present lately, which has introduced me to the idea that the lifestyle I have been living is not the one I should be living. I need novelty and uncertainty to maintain what really feels like “living”. I have been thriving off the adrenaline that accompanies travel so much so that I have started to wonder if I will ever be a person who settles in one place for long. The more I learn about the world the more I want to know.

I have had absolutely no routine. At one point I told myself I needed to adapt and create a routine, but now I’m wondering, should I ride this wave and go wherever it takes me? There is an unexpected beauty that comes with unpredictability. Life has been in a perpetual state of To Be Determined. Spontaneity. Jake and I’s motto has become “sin verguenza”, which translates literally to “without embarrassment or shame”, which is true, but it also represents a life without boundaries or any sort of limitations. Do what you want and forget about what people think.

I have not experienced culture shock here, at least not in its traditional form. I’m constantly shocked at what I see and with what I am experiencing, but never once has it scared me away. Never once have I regretted this decision. I can guarantee, however, that I will have reverse culture shock when I get home. Nothing personal Fam, but as of now I don’t ever want to go home. What is “home”, anyway?

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graciela-en-chile-blog · 8 years

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12 de enero, 2017 *updated*

I have now been in Santiago exactly one week. I have been soaking up the sun and life itself. I am now sitting in 86 degree sunshine sipping instant coffee and reflecting on how this last week has felt like four. I have approximately 143 days left to go but I already feel like I have lived more than I ever have in just one week. Time still throws me. I am stuck in limbo deciding whether “I can’t believe its already been a week” and “I can’t believe its only been a week”.

Deciding to live in a new city is entirely different than visiting a new city. The little aspects that you generally don’t think about in your daily life become magnified and even the metro ride to school and finding your way to class becomes and interesting venture. It is challenging to create a new reality, but the invention is entirely yours. This last week has been 100% about establishing new norms.

Some examples:

There is certainly a learning curve that accompanies moving in to a host families’ home. They know nothing about you, yet treat you as their own. It is challenging enough moving into someone else’s house when they are of your same culture, but throw in the fact that you are unaware of their cultural realities and unexpected things are bound to happen. Like worrying you are too late for dinner but instead walking in the house to a party.

I am relieved to not have cellular data. I am no longer looking at life through a screen and I am forced to look at what is right in front of me. My phone is no longer my outlet because it can’t be my outlet. It has forced me to realize how much I rely on technology. I no longer have a map and as someone who is directionally challenged in an enormous city, I have had to get crafty. But it forces you to use your smarts or put away your pride are realize it is okay to ask for help.

Life hack: When you don’t have a map but you do have a city covered graffiti, you use graffiti as your landmarks to navigate the city.

I have to light a match and ignite the water heater every time I want to take a shower, and it can’t be a long one. I can do one load of laundry a week, Sunday, and it is not at my leisure. I can’t eat an entire avocado in one sitting because they are expensive (that is a hard norm for me to accept). I have grown to appreciate simplicity and the beauty in only using what is necessary.

I have grown accustomed to drinking only instant coffee. Actual cafes are few and far between. Nescafe is practically all you can find and grabbing a coffee at one of the many convenient stores around is your best bet. Who doesn’t want an instant cappuccino though, right?

My favorite thing to grab for lunch is Arepa, a Venezuelan sandwich, that you can get at a little food cart that is easily spotted under a big green umbrella for 1500 pesos, which is about 2.25 USD. The same guy serves me everyday.

My new favorite bar is just down the street from where my classes are. It is called “Springfield” and is The Simpson’s themed (its a little taste of home). It has an open ceiling with what I assume is ivy hanging from it. You can get a liter of beer for 1500 pesos while you sit on red plastic stools and listen to whatever is playing on the jukebox. You can choose a song for 100 pesos--naturally Jake’s favorite thing to play is Shakira. It is not a pretty bar, it is a “get the job done” bar with quirky character, and thats why I like it.

Almost every public transit trip consists of someone trying to make money in one way or another. Whether it be free-styling, selling water/fans/nail files or dancing to Bruno Mars. It doesn’t matter if it is the bus or the metro, at least once a day someone is bound to get on a play their guitar.

I now understand what it is like to stick out like a sore thumb as a minority. Having blonde hair and light skin is what makes you physically assimilate in the states, but those are the exact characteristics that make people turn and look here in Santiago. Sometimes even blatantly point at you on the beach. No matter how good my Spanish is I never blend in. I do have to say though, it is nice that surveyors on street corners don’t approach you because they assume you couldn’t possibly understand them.

This last week has been nothing but trial and error and testing the waters, but all you can do is dive right in.

*pictures aren’t working; I will post later*

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graciela-en-chile-blog · 8 years

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There is something called “Chilean time” that those of us from the United States were warned about before we stepped out into the world of Chile. Chilean time essentially means that if you tell them to show up to your party at four, they will show up at seven. That is a bit of an exaggeration, but not entirely. At first I didn’t really understand this concept but now I am witnessing their disregard for time in all of its forms and I realize the above description is more of a summary than an exact description. As someone who grew up in a place where timeliness was valued, I expected to regard Chilean time as negative. But actually I regard it as positive. I am actually rather inspired by it.

Their disregard for time is not carelessness. They simply care more about enjoying the present moment than being on time for another one. I have spent nearly every meal sitting with my host mom and others outside on their private patio. Each meal we take one step at a time, first enjoying the entree, then maybe a salad, then dessert. There is no sense of urgency at all. Everyone is laying back in their seats talking, or maybe not talking, and enjoying.

There is also a time of day in between lunch and dinner called “once”. It is yet another time to take a seat, sip some coffee or tea, and nibble at some bread or another small snack. If the combination of sun and a full belly makes you tired, throw in a siesta. I see it all as another way to embrace the current moment and allow yourself to take a break--and not feel bad about it.

Sometimes the parties don’t start until after midnight. More often than not they don’t start until then. People trickle in on their own timeline showing up with pisco and cola and bags of ice all for the taking. These parties can last any amount of time and its not unusual to take your uber home at four or five in the morning. From what I’ve noticed, these parties happen frequently. Any chance to enjoy company and share an experience is an opportunity to take.

Kids will live with their parents until they are married. There is no rush to move out. Parents want their kids and families around to spend time with them. There is a certain amount of leisure in everything that is done.

I see their lack of structure as their form of structure. There are always going to be the things that are expected but life has more of a guideline than a timeline. Moral of the story: time is not of the essence.

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graciela-en-chile-blog · 8 years

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el 6 de enero, 2017

“Overwhelmed” is the word of day. Maybe the word of the week, maybe even the word of the next five months. Overwhelmed with happiness, overwhelmed with pride, overwhelmed with fear, overwhelmed with anxiety, and overwhelmed with gratefulness. I am currently lying in my new bed where four other students have come and gone. I just stopped crying. Not sad tears or bad tears. Tears that were the release of “overwhelmed” in all of its varieties.

I am so happy to be here in Santiago, Chile. Its a gorgeous city with its buildings intertwining with trees and green that make me feel less like I’m in a concrete jungle and more like I’m in a place I could happily navigate forever. My eyes can’t keep up with everything around me.

I am bursting with pride because this trip is the manifestation of two years of preparation fueled by determination. It still doesn’t feel real and I keep having to remind myself of where I am. (It felt really good exiting the “travel checklist” tab that I had left open on my computer just now. There is nothing left to check off of that list.) I am here, at my destination, yet the journey has just begun.

I am scared and full of anxiety. I have no idea what is going to happen; and its a strange feeling having to tell myself, “well, there is no turning back now”. All that I can do is keeping looking forward.

I am grateful. My North American peers have made it so easy to let my guard down. We are all equally vulnerable and collectively accepting this vulnerability has made us a stronger group. We spent last night up far too late getting to know each other as we drank pisco sours and danced (quite obviously) like gringos. I am learning just as much about other parts of the United States as I am about Latin America. Seeing other peoples drive and love for travel fuels my own drive.

I am grateful for my wonderful host family. They have welcomed me with open arms and made me feel comfortable in the most uncomfortable place I have ever been. I have never been so far from my comfort zone. But in consequence I have never been closer to where I need to be. The final destination is not a location.

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