halfapoet

[halfapoet]

"Life is not a poem" but humans are. Every single human being is a poem. They walk around with their own lives tied to so many others, all of them feel such different things on the same day, they could be in the same crowd living entirely different lives, they're on the same train going to completely different places for reasons that are worlds apart. Maybe the person you bumped into today is getting married tomorrow. Maybe the person who sold you flowers the day before is going through the worst heartache of his life. There are so many stories in so many people and if that's not poetry.

[halfapoet]

Part of the reason why being seventeen feels so much like the world ending is because we spend years romanticizing this one age. Movies and books and stories will tell you about seventeen year old characters who saved the world, overthrew the government with their friends, did something permanent and beautiful, while falling in love with their soulmate. You wait for all that, but turns out seventeen is a mess. Half your friends aren't real. Maybe you have a partner who hates you or you've never had your first kiss. And that's okay because seventeen year olds are literally babies.

[halfapoet]

4th May, 2025

[halfapoet]

I am healing from old wounds and it is easier now, because it is april.

18th april, friday

[halfapoet]

Qays spent ages writing about Layla. In his poems, she was otherworldly, gorgeous, and perfect. When the king heard of his poems and the woman in them, he ordered for Layla to be brought before him. When he saw her, he was angry and disappointed. He had expected the most beautiful woman, but to him, Layla was plain and nothing so great. The concept that if you are not Qays, you will not understand why she is Layla. There's poetry in this story.

[halfapoet]

I'm twenty two but a part of me will always be seventeen, crying over my birthday cake because of a fight with my boyfriend I couldn't tell anyone about; I'll always be twenty, driving home from the hospital, leaving my father there to wait for his father's death; I'll always be a fourteen year old girl, watching everyone find their calling and just waiting on the sidelines to feel something; I'll always be twenty one, starting to love my hometown because of three friends from college; I'll always be a kid in August, walking away from my parents' car with two bags, going towards my own life.

[halfapoet]

In this poem, I go out shopping with my friends; we spend an obscene amount on basic coffee to feel less hollow on the inside. We're driving back in the sunset, listening to music, talking about nothing at all, and I'm thinking of how this is everything I used to want. In this poem, it starts to rain after dark and everyone knows about the boy who has my heart. He holds me like I mean something, his friends are sick of me stealing him, and his mother knows how I like my coffee. In this poem, nobody knows I'm scared of going home. Every street reminds me of what could've been and what once was. It reminds me of how different life could've been, where I could've been stuck. In this poem, I don't know if I'm chasing, or running.

[halfapoet]

Love is always left unfinished, I think. We were talking once, I was telling him about this story I really liked as a kid but I couldn't remember the name. He said it's okay, I can tell him when I remember. When I was on the phone with my mother last night, she asked if I remember the book I loved when I was young. And I did. I have the name now but I don't have him. That's just how it is, I think. You spend a few months together but you have to wave him goodbye at the airport. Or you're in each other's lives for years and because of one technicality, one glitch … you're not anymore. You're married, you do everything right, you have years and because we're human, one person dies first. Someone is gone and you're left with the name of the book but no one to say it to.

[halfapoet]

I'm waving goodbye, but you cannot see. Your heart has been somewhere else for a few weeks and your back is turned toward me. I've been lingering like a fool, waiting for you to take notice of how silent I've been. You're going to tell our friends tomorrow, I became distant for no reason. They'll probably ask me a few questions, wonder why I don't look at you anymore. You'll go on with your life, probably won't even mention me to your girl. A part of me will always be waiting.

[halfapoet]

In every universe, you give me your heart. In every universe, I don't know what to do with it. So I let it go.

[halfapoet]

I heard you told your new girl we were casual and didn't mean anything.

Was it casual, when I fell asleep listening to your voice and you didn't move an inch so I wouldn't wake. Was it casual, when I was on the screen and your mom walked in, so you introduced me to her like it was nothing. Did they really not mean anything, the things you whispered while you were slipping my skirt off. Was it casual when you whispered, "do you know how much you mean to me" and kissed me like our world was ending. Your sister knows my birthday. All your friends know my name. You cried on my chest when you couldn't get over the pain. Was it casual when you wrote me poems. Was it casual when you made me happier than I had ever been. Was it casual when I left lipstick stains on every inch of your skin.

Was it. Was it. Was it.

Is that what led you to fall asleep at her house. Because it was casual, you thought I'd be willing to share your mouth. It didn't mean anything, so you looked me in the eye while she was waiting for you that night.

It's all casual right? So she wouldn't mind, if you slipped into another bed, just one last time?

[halfapoet]

In another universe, you make me feel loved before I have to beg ask

in this one, I know I am feel insignificant in your life.

[halfapoet]

My mom told me to pack quickly or I'll be late for my flight. She said I'll regret it if I leave anything behind. But mom, what if my flight comes when I don't expect it and I don't have time to collect my things? What if I don't know I have to leave in fifteen minutes and when the time comes, all I can do is zone out and watch my whole world fall? Mom, what if this is always my life? Setting all the things I love inside a home, thinking I'll live here forever and when I'm happy and comfortable, I look up to find a flight waiting for me because I have to leave. Do you see it now? Do you understand why I don't have to pack? I never took my important things out of the bag. 

this isn't about travelling and flights btw. do with it what you will.

[halfapoet]

DRAMIONE FIC RECS + WHY YOU SHOULD READ THEM — 100k+ words edition

hogwarts: a home by coralcollective — reimagined horcrux hunt. draco is so down bad for hermione and the smut is crazyyy. theo/hermione friendship. pansy is the breakout character and you'll love her. there's nsfw art and inappropriate use of the malfoy signet ring. please check the tags! (it says incomplete on ao3, but it's only missing epilogues so don't be afraid of starting it)

word count: 372,978

chapters: 67/70

the commoner's guide to bedding a royal by olivieblake — god, this fic!!!! it's a modern royal au and the ensemble of characters make this whole world feel so alive. it's inspired by will/kate and harry/meghan and it's sooo cute. theo and daphne were the breakout characters and i love them dearly. if you're looking for a lighthearted romcom-esque, occasionally angsty (because duh!) fic, this is it!!! i probably read this in two days which is insane considering the word count, but that should just tell you how lovely this whole fic was. there's a second part to this if you're itching for more afterwards (and it's just as good!)

word count: 503,570

chapters: 45/45

draco malfoy and the mortifying ordeal of being in love by isthisselfcare — honestly if you haven't read this yet..... this is god tier. a CLASSIC. this should be taught in the schools. hermione's a magical researcher / healer and draco's one of the best aurors out there. he's assigned to protect hermione because she's in the midst of a big discovery. hermione's not happy about it and draco isn't either. slow burn!! idiots in LOVE!! forced proximity!!!!! EMBEDDED ART!!! honestly this is the fic that made me want to learn how to bind which is so serious and if you haven't read this yet you need to.

word count: 199,548

chapters: 36/36

the disappearances of draco malfoy by speechwriter — this is my new canon. it's a deathly hallows rewrite where draco accepts dumbledore's offer to fake his death and go into hiding with the order. enemies to friends to lovers. i honestly can't even remember what happened in canon because this is IT for me.

word count: 289,780

chapters: 33/33

this world or any other series by olivieblake — includes clean (book one) and marked (book two). anything by olivieblake should be a must-read, i swear to god. this one starts as a year 6 slow burn. draco and hermione are assigned partners for potions and it all snowballs from there. olivie writes so beautifully and her characterizations for hermione / draco are so good. slight warning for marked: this destroyed me and i pretend it doesn't exist, but it's still a must-read.

word count: 118,892 & 178,268

chapters: 31/31 & 39/39

rights and wrongs series by lovesbitca8 — you want fluffy dramione? read the first two parts of the rights and wrongs series. you want dark and heavy dramione? read the auction, an alternate universe of the fluffy dramione, where voldemort wins and they all get auctioned off to death eaters. please check the tags for the voldy wins au! all three were chef's kiss and coming from someone who isn't a fan of dark aus, reading the first two helped me get through the auction because you know where draco's coming from / what's in his head. you can just read the auction without reading the first two parts unless you like catching parallels and having more depth / context (which i very much love).

word count: 174,911 & 160,297 & 325,876

chapters: 36/36 & 24/24 & 41/41

[halfapoet]

god tier dramione fanfics

Draco Malfoy and the Mortifying Ordeal of Being in Love by isthisselfcare {https://archiveofourown.org/works/34500952/chapters/85870804}

Isolation by bexchan {https://archiveofourown.org/works/23461513?view_full_work=true}

Rights and Wrongs series by LovesBitca8 {https://archiveofourown.org/series/1007625}

Remain Nameless by HeyJude19 {https://archiveofourown.org/works/23875939/chapters/57393508}

Breath Mints / Battle Scars by Onyx_and_Elm {https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/35668776?show_comments=true}

Wait and Hope by mightbewriting {https://archiveofourown.org/works/22818646/chapters/54531817}

Bring Him to His Knees by Musyc {https://archiveofourown.org/works/24481312/chapters/59089624}

Dragon’s Heartstrings by pinkinku {https://archiveofourown.org/works/46585585/chapters/117313114}

Cherry Mint by dirtymudblood {https://archiveofourown.org/works/21053894/chapters/50081633}

Love In A Time Of The Zombie Apocalypse by rizzlewrites {https://archiveofourown.org/works/28137807/chapters/68944698}

All You Want by senlinyu {https://archiveofourown.org/works/15153092/chapters/35140268}

Apple Pies and Other Amends by ToEatAPeach {https://archiveofourown.org/works/8156101/chapters/18691246}

The Gloriana Set by ThebeMoon {https://archiveofourown.org/works/16821571/chapters/39485710}

Love and Other Misfortunes by senlinyu {https://archiveofourown.org/works/14380728/chapters/33204618}

This World or Any Other series by olivieblake {https://archiveofourown.org/series/502333}

[halfapoet]

Wrote something on Instagram

[halfapoet]

I want to tell you I miss you like a child misses home on a bad day in school. I think of how your eyes go soft when I walk into a room and your gentle insistence, for me to stay a little longer. I look at the flowers that have been on my shelf for months now and something tells me to give them to you. They mean so much to me, they will be insignificant to you. But they're important to me and you are building a place in my heart and I cannot think of how else to tell you all of this. I've looked at these flowers every day for the past several months and I want to look at you everyday for even longer, if you'll let me. I want to tell you how for the past few weeks, on every bad day I've thought of how safe you always make me feel. I miss you, constantly. It's an ache, like we've known each other for years. Except we haven't. You don't even know my favorite colour. But I remember how the moon looked when I hugged you goodbye. I remember thinking, oh what a way to die.