hiwhatdoisay

[hiwhatdoisay]

I love you so much

[hiwhatdoisay]

Broke college student tip:

Learn to love cooking. Like get into it. Enjoy it. Get excited to cook. Why? When you learn to cook and enjoy it you'll save money. Lots of money. And you'll be eating better, healthier food too.

For example. I'm eating seafood and veggie pasta right now with a white wine cream sauce. In a restaurant, this would be a fancy meal, costing $20 or so for a small portion. Literally cost me like $5 or so in ingredients to make. And like 20 minutes to cook. And I made enough for lunch AND dinner. When you know how to cook you can make cheap foods taste amazing.

Here's some advice how to make this easier:

Buy frozen things. Frozen veggies, frozen fruits, frozen meats, etc. Frozen lasts longer and saves you money and stress.

Have basic herbs and spices on hand. Salt, pepper (red, black, and white), thyme, rosemary, basil, garlic powder, onion powder, turmeric, bay leaf (chopped is best), cinnamon, paprika, cumin, and sage are my most commonly used ones!

Common recipe ingredients to keep on hand: pasta, rice, lemon/lime juice, garlic, onion, white wine, frozen veggies, potatoes, frozen meats, sugar, butter, pasta sauces, tomatoes, eggs, soda/pineapple juice/beer (great for marinades or cooking meat).

Frozen things when stored properly can be stored for a couple months and portioned out making quick meals easy!

Learn flavor profiles. Citrus, basil, rosemary, butter, salt, garlic, and onion are all fairly universal in their uses while things like cumin and turmeric have a stronger, earlier flavor and are great for stews, curries, pastas, soups, and sauces!

Learn to shop. If it's non-perishable and bogo, get it! Bogo (buy one get one) is basically half off and now you have two things for when you need it! Walmart brand pasta is like $0.98 a box. You can also get a bag of frozen extra small shrimp at Walmart for like $5 and there's about 50 in a bag. Shop non-perishable items by weight (price per ounce) and perishables by size.

Pasta sauce can be put in the freezer and if stored well can keep for like 3 months!

Sauté your veggies! They taste so good that way!!! A little butter, garlic, rosemary, and onion. Sprinkle with salt after and viola!

It's easy to fall into a food rut, so treat yourself every now and then with something different or challenge yourself by limiting yourself to 5 ingredients or something to make you exercise your skills.

Make your own barbecue sauce. It's so fun! All you need is molasses, ketchup, brown sugar, and whatever you want to customize it. I usually put honey and bourbon in mine.

Go on pinterest and find easy recipes! The great thing about a recipe is every single one you see is customizable and was made to the cooker's preference. You don't like mushrooms? Don't put them in and add something earthy and unami like turmeric or sumac in its place.

Tofu is easier than you think.

Rice is very filling and goes with most everything.

Keep fresh herbs fresh by putting them in water. You might even root and grow your own!

Frozen fruits are amazing for marinades or more "tropical" tasting recipes. Frozen citrus and pineapple are great for making a citrus chicken and rice! Just defrost in a bowl and then add the chicken to the bowl.

Tortillas are amazing and keep for a while in the fridge.

Print out recipes and keep them in a binder so you make notes and changes directly on the paper!

[hiwhatdoisay]

a uni survival guide: tips from a phd

if there's one thing i know about, it's college. i've done it, i've taught it, i've lived and breathed it. these tips are for first years in particular, but honestly for everybody. i think it's so important for people to have balanced lives in these years -- academics are not everything. you know what didn't help me in the real world when i was afraid i wouldn't live through it? my fancy college note-taking format. you know what did help me? the friends i made there who i knew would get on a plane and fly across the country in a matter of hours if i told them i needed them.

academic

- figure out where class is held ahead of time: don't be that kid who's late on day one, i beg of you

- use the writing center: especially for basic grammatical editing, which a lot of professors don't have time to mark on papers

- speak up in class: talking through ideas helps you work through them, and asking questions about something you don't understand can open up great lines of conversation

- find a regular schedule that works for you and stick to it: my college schedule was morning free time, class, lunch, class, practice, homework. that consistency was a life-saver

- keep a planner: it's so important to have a central place to track deadlines, assignments, and engagements

- annotate your reading: when you're stressing about a paper topic, being able to go back to what you've highlighted and written in the margins is a life-saver

- color-code your coursework: i use the same color highlighter, pen, and notebook for any given class. it's super helpful

- if you can't focus while studying with friends, don't: i reserved group studying for days when i didn't have important work because i can't be in a room with other people without talking to them. if your school has one, the quiet floor of the library is your best friend

- treat yourself to a "fun" class: art was always my place to just sit back and chill, a way to end the night all zen in the darkroom instead of conjugating russian verbs in a fluorescent-lit cinderblock prison. for you, it could be gym, it could be pottery, it could be some random course about, like, the history of cooking or something -- explore!

- profs are people too: don't be too nervous around them. also, know that if you're struggling -- even b/c of something in your personal life -- you can admit it, and they'll almost always understand why you missed a deadline or bombed a test

- go to office hours: it's the only way to get to know professors in big courses, and it's so helpful for both your grades and learning how to navigate relationships with authority figures

social

- don't let academia keep you from your friends: it's a case-by-case basis, but sometimes it's okay to let the reading slide and spend time with friends. i graduated seven years ago and my college group text still talks every day. that's so much more important to me than the fact that i never finished brideshead revisited

- joining a club is one of the best ways to make friends: i played ultimate frisbee through college and it was the source of so many lasting relationships, as well as the way i met all my local friends when i was abroad

- say yes to things you don't know if you'll like: you'll surprise yourself. me? turns out i love drinking games. and theme parties. and skinny dipping. and rock climbing

- don't be that person who looks down on their peers for partying: honestly? that person kind of sucks. you don't have to party if you don't want to, but actually, a lot of those people are super nice and also good at school -- don't just write them off!

- show up for your friends: go to their games, their concerts, their art shows, their standup nights. show them that what matters to them matters to you, too

- set aside a night to do a group activity with others: whether your vibe is wednesday night trivia, a weekly "terrible movie" showing, or a get-high-and-watch-nature-documentaries-type thing, these are great ways to liven up the week and de-stress

- this is a great time to figure out who from high school really matters to you: you don't have to force relationships that were built mostly on convenience if there are friends at uni with whom you click more. people you became friends with purely based on the coincidence of where your parents lived do not have to be your forever friends. they can be! but they don't have to be

personal

- don't expect too much of yourself: a 4.0 is not the end-all, be-all. if your family or somebody tells you it is, tell them to call me, and i will personally talk some sense into them

- take advantage of university support services: mental health counseling, free yoga classes, multi-cultural societies, etc

- drink water: please, please don't get kidney stones in the middle of the semester, says the girl who got kidney stones in the middle of the semester

- let yourself take breaks: if you need to lie to a professor and say you're sick when really you're just feeling down and you need to sit in bed and watch a movie, that's totally valid

- don't freak about individual assignments: my students come to me freaking over a B+ and i tell them, honey, no job interviewer is ever going to ask you about your second paper from communications 101. i wish i'd known that

- go see speakers if there's someone interesting coming to campus: these talks are always cooler than you expect. i'll never get over the fact that i didn't go see anita hill when she came to my undergrad

- do your laundry on the same night every week: i can't explain why this is so helpful but it really is

- keep up on the news and the memes: read the school paper, the school blog, the memes page -- college politics and inside jokes are fun and convoluted and fascinating

- set the groundwork for long-term self-care: all of the above is really just to say -- university isn't just for learning about the french revolution, it's also about learning how to balance, how to handle failure, how to ask for help, how to make a salad that doesn't totally suck, etc

[hiwhatdoisay]

For anyone who may be living on their own for the first time, here’s a list of things that I wish I had purchased/was glad I purchased for my apartment before I needed them:

A basic toolkit (you can get a decent one for $10 from IKEA)

A plunger (seriously…buy one before you need one)

A first-aid kit

A drain snake (if you don’t know what this is, it’s a long, thin piece of plastic with little plastic thorns that you slide down the drain to help clear clogged drains)

A thermometer

Tape

Wet wipes

An umbrella

Rain boots

Nail clippers

Scissors

Aloe or some form of sunburn relief

Sunblock

Insect repellent

An ice pack or two

A heating pad

A travel mug

An extra pillow/blanket (not just for guests…stuff happens, don’t find yourself sleeping on a bare bed because you spilled something or the dryer broke unexpectedly)

Extra chargers!! Nothing is worse than realizing your phone charger doesn’t work when you really need it to. Buy an extra and just stick it in a drawer until you need it.

Printer paper

An electric kettle

Lightbulbs

Batteries

Some type of water filter (to people like me, who have lived somewhere with good well water for most of their lives…just because you CAN drink the unfiltered tap water, does not mean you’ll WANT TO drink the unfiltered tap water)

Ice cube trays

A tire gauge!! You do not have to know a thing about cars to figure out a tire gauge, and EVERYONE should be able to read their tire pressure. If you struggle with using them, buy one of the electric ones. The recommended tire pressure is on the inside of your door, just unscrew the cap on the tire and press the nozzle into place. You shouldn’t hear air escaping if you want a good reading!

For anyone moving internationally, please make sure you check to see if you’ll need to buy plug adapters before you move!

For anyone living alone, add-a-locks are great to make your front door more secure. It’s a piece of metal that fits around the bolt, and then a piece of plastic-coated metal that locks into it at an angle to make it so that, even if the lock is picked, the door does not open. Make sure you get one that is the correct size for your door.

I’ll add more items as I think of them; I’m still learning what belongs on this list myself, and I moved out four years ago. Good luck!

[hiwhatdoisay]

I really did want to marry you. I want you to know that. And I’m sorry i stopped wearing the ring. But I will never take it off again. I need you to know how much I love you

[hiwhatdoisay]

The man says to me: run! For she is a cruel deceiver.

I will not, for she deceives nill spare herself

[hiwhatdoisay]

I will forever wait for you. I will always hope you love me the same way I love you

[hiwhatdoisay]

I hope we are not done

[hiwhatdoisay]

I love you

[hiwhatdoisay]

I really hope you still love me the way I love you

[hiwhatdoisay]

The reason people get so horrified when they hear your trauma isn’t because they don’t believe you, it’s because they dont want to believe you. People who are not traumatised like to believe that the world is inherently good, so when you tell them something so horrifying they cannot and will not accept it. I think that is why I struggle to find someone to talk to about my life

[hiwhatdoisay]

I love you. I know you think you’re better off alone but I’m not better of without you. And I don’t think you’re better off without me

[hiwhatdoisay]

I’ll give you space because I love you but I hope you come back

[hiwhatdoisay]

Forever and ever

[hiwhatdoisay]

I love you Ill wait forever

[hiwhatdoisay]

I love you so much

[hiwhatdoisay]

I love you I listened and I’m trying