idontcareifyoudo

[idontcareifyoudo]

[idontcareifyoudo]

Tom Palumbo. Woman on bicycle holding umbrella, 1950

[idontcareifyoudo]

[idontcareifyoudo]

Martin Parr. Seafront, Blackpool, 1977

[idontcareifyoudo]

Thoughts

Always feeling tired but never being able to fall asleep.

Wanting to say a million thing but feeling nothing at the same time.

What even is the point?

[idontcareifyoudo]

An alliance

[idontcareifyoudo]

i deadass lost interest in everything. im just cruising on autopilot rn

[idontcareifyoudo]

[idontcareifyoudo]

 332. Diana of Versailles (Diana the Huntress) - Musée du Louvre, Paris, France

[idontcareifyoudo]

Apathy

I can't even start to care about anything. I hate my life but at the same time I couldn't give less of a shit. The world could end this instant and I wouldn't care at all.

So, am I depressed or am I really depressed?

Fuck living... I don't even know what's stopping me from ending it all.

Drinking has my brain all scrambled. I wish I had a cigarette right now. At least it would bring me closer to the end.

Maybe I should start writing a diary again?

I am a total failure of a human being :)

[idontcareifyoudo]

[idontcareifyoudo]

Exhausted

I'm just so exhausted of everything. It doesn't seem like it'll get better. The only way I'll get some rest is if I die...

I'm angry, I'm sad, I'm depressed. I hate them for doing this to me. I wish I could be an asshole but I can't.

Guess my morals is about the only thing I have going for myself...

End me, please.

[idontcareifyoudo]

I can't take this anymore

I can't take this anymore

I can't take this anymore

I can't take this anymore

[idontcareifyoudo]

Another day

Almost cancelled on my friends yesterday but in the end, managed to get my ass out the house. But today is another day aaaaand I'm having difficulty just to go grocery shopping.

Guess I'd rather starve??

It's pathetic, actually, that the only thing to get me out is the need to buy ciggies...

Not proud of myself

[idontcareifyoudo]

No Motivation

Uhhhh... The title says it. I've been so unmotivated to do anything for a while now.

Honestly think my depression is coming back again. It's the same thing all over again, I get involved, I start doing something and then nothing. I start ignoring people, ignoring any responsibilities or tasks that I have to do/ can do... And that just pushes me even more into this cycle of self-loathing because I want to be active and I want to be helpful but I literally can't.

I can't even talk about this with anyone... Everyone has this image of me, that I have my shit together, I know what I'm doing, I have no problems and I'm happy but the truth couldn't be farther from that. And I would never ask for help anyways, unloading these thoughts on someone just seems unfair to the other person... Yeah... I make it worse for myself.

All in all, the more I think about this, the more I hate myself. But I guess it be like that sometimes...

[idontcareifyoudo]

lol k

I forgot all about this side blog...

Maybe it's time to post some bullshit here again?

:)))

[idontcareifyoudo]

I’m dumb

I’m really really really fucking dumb

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

I don’t even know if I should regret it 

Maybe I should but I don’t really feel it

I’m just so stupid and naive