imbeautifulwhenimsad - Tumblr blog

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“Its not what you said, it’s how you said it”

— every sign to scorpio

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Happy birthday Aquarius ♒︎

Be the weirdos you were born to be!!!!

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Please tell me “You’re doing great” “keep your work” “you’ve done a good job” and then hug me.

I just need someone to be on my side. Tell me things gonna be alright. Is it true, price of success is loneliness?

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[imbeautifulwhenimsad]

Sometimes I just need someone tells me that Im not wrong, that Im on the right way.

I always scare Im not good enough, not smart enough, not beautiful enough.

People see me always smile but they never know I cry every night.

I just wanna try my best, is that hard for people to understand. Tired being human in this selfish world.

I dont want to be sad but sadness kills me everynight. I want love and being loved but I scare to show my real person again. They’re all gonna leave me.

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I miss our last huging

After 1 year, I still feel your arms around me so tight on that midnight - the last time we met but I never know that till the day we broke up.

I know you have someone else, I used to blame you for everything after I felt depressed by your accusations aimed at me. Your words are deeper than a knife, it cut my heart into pieces when I try to comming back to you.

But now, after all, I can move on and only think back our good memories.

I know you tried to fix us, but the distance between us is longer everyday, the problem we cant solve, our unclear future and she, came in the right moment.

And I know I liked you, but our relationship made me tired and I stressed because I dont know how to get out, how to make my heart beated like the first time I saw you, how to being happy to meet you, how to face with you and my emotions.

We were a perfect match for a time, but sadly matches burned.

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How fk thats hard to find a lover

Sometimes I wish I was a normal girl who can find a normal boyfriend and happy ever after. But why I have to be so fucking weird, so fucking strong like the storm so no one can fit me. May be I should date myself.

Accept that and stop finding a boy, fuck love, you need money.

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Sometimes I wish I was a normal girl who can find a normal boyfriend and happy ever after. But why I have to be so fucking weird, so fucking strong like the storm so no one can fit me. May be I should date myself.

Accept that and stop finding a boy, fuck love, you need money.

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Roses, c. 1890. Abbott Handerson Thayer

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What is worst between lost yourself and lost someone?

I definetly can answer this question. Lost yourself did.

I fall in love once. With a fuck boy (honestly after the breakup I know that).

He said he wanna change and Im the reason for that movement. Lately I know, I can't teach a man how to be a good man. You cant give someone the thing they dont have, you can't change them. No one can.

I don't know if that's lucky for me or not because after this fucking toxic relationship, I'm still virgin.

So it's a very short relationship I ever had in my life. No more than 5 months, I can't stand anymore. He don't care about me and how Im dead inside everyday. But the fuckboy is that, they always show how bad they are, how sexy and some sexual stuffs.They are intersted with you, they are very sticky with you at the begin of a relationship. But that doesnt take long till they can put his dick into your pussy or in my case when he cant have what he wants. He leaved.

I am the first say goodbye. But I know he wants this end before me. How fucking the boys are when they don't even have a little brave to tell "hey go away, im sick of you". They re always letting the hardest part for me. Makes me feel like Im fucking terrible

But then I know. He has someone else. He is cheating on me.

But the shit part is, he always pretend like he is so generous and Im the bad ?

He blamed me for everything at our last conversation. I said nothing

It makes me feel im bad and im sad.

Holy shiet, nothing at all? Damn Im fucking stupid.

I should know he has a new girl sooner before I let him say all that fucking terrible words.

But now i know. Im good enough. Im fucking love me myself and I.

I used to lost myself but not anymore. I will smile more and let it go.

(Write on a late night fighting with my mess in mind 1:14am)