impossiblelibrary

[impossiblelibrary]

In a world needing nuance, I embrace the ambiguity. Not being able to pin me down ethnically, words that help describe one as still finding yourself, like queer instead of a specific label in the alphabet magical academy. Feel like I need a reread of Passing.

"Passing is a meditation on the uneasy dynamic between social obligation and personal freedom. It dramatizes the impossibility of self-invention in a society in which nuance and ambiguity are considered fatal threats to the social order."

-Emily Bernard, Electric Literature

[impossiblelibrary]

If u want to write a story about a character that’s just you but hotter with a dark twisted backstory and magical powers and a pet falcon or something, I think u should just go ahead and do that. Who’s gonna stop you? The government?? Fuck the police.

[impossiblelibrary]

My new obsession with solo RPG journaling has smashed into my binge rewatching of Queer Eye. Anyone interested in a solo journaling game where you imagine yourself getting a glow up by the Fab 5?

[impossiblelibrary]

What an amazing idea!

[impossiblelibrary]

Kiki's Delivery Service by Eiko Kadono 🐈‍⬛️

Fairyloot Edition 🧚🏻‍♀️

[impossiblelibrary]

Unhealed Wounds Your Character Pretends Are Just “Personality Traits”

These are the things your character claims are just “how they are” but really, they’re bleeding all over everyone and calling it a vibe.

╰ They say they're "independent." Translation: They don’t trust anyone to stay. They learned early that needing people = disappointment. So now they call it “being self-sufficient” like it’s some shiny badge of honor. (Mostly to cover up how lonely they are.)

╰ They say they're "laid-back." Translation: They stopped believing their wants mattered. They'll eat anywhere. Do anything. Agree with everyone. Not because they're chill, but because the fight got beaten out of them a long time ago.

╰ They say they're "a perfectionist." Translation: They believe mistakes make them unlovable. Every typo. Every bad hair day. Every misstep feels like proof that they’re worthless. So they polish and polish and polish... until there’s nothing real left.

╰ They say they're "private." Translation: They’re terrified of being judged—or worse, pitied. Walls on walls on walls. They joke about being “mysterious” while desperately hoping no one gets close enough to see the mess behind the curtain.

╰ They say they're "ambitious." Translation: They think achieving enough will finally make the emptiness go away. If they can just get the promotion, the award, the validation—then maybe they’ll finally outrun the feeling that they’re fundamentally broken. (It never works.)

╰ They say they're "good at moving on." Translation: They’re world-class at repression. They’ll cut people out. Bury heartbreak. Pretend it never happened. And then wonder why they wake up at 3 a.m. feeling like they're suffocating.

╰ They say they're "logical." Translation: They’re terrified of their own feelings. Emotions? Messy. Dangerous. Uncontrollable. So they intellectualize everything to avoid feeling anything real. They call it rationality. (It's fear.)

╰ They say they're "loyal to a fault." Translation: They mistake abandonment for loyalty. They stay too long. Forgive too much. Invest in people who treat them like an afterthought, because they think walking away makes them "just as bad."

╰ They say they're "resilient." Translation: They don't know how to ask for help without feeling like a burden. They wear every bruise like a trophy. They survive things they should never have had to survive. And they call it strength. (But really? It's exhaustion wearing a cape.)

[impossiblelibrary]

I’m sorry this art, are you kidding??? didnt know it was that serious omg this is beautiful

[impossiblelibrary]

Veil Haven coded

don’t go into the woods

[impossiblelibrary]

"If you're changing careers, you're lost. If you're staying put, you're stuck. If you're resting, you're lazy. If youre striving, you're never satisfied. There's no right answer, only that you should have one by now."

Oh, so people can judge you and come up with a quick single word that let's them stop thinking more deeply. This blew my mind, so if everything has a bad connotation, then nothing matters. They'll judge you harshly no matter what, judge you as wanting, as not enough, no matter what. This is what the French existentialism feels like: if there's no right answer, then the answer never mattered in the first place. This is what freedom from worrying about those judgements feels like: fuck it, then Imma just do what I want.

[impossiblelibrary]

JOMP Book Photo Challenge

May 13, 2025 - Watercolors 🎨

Time to post my bookmarks again!

[impossiblelibrary]

[impossiblelibrary]

Oh my gosh. I just found this website that walks you though creating a believable society. It breaks each facet down into individual questions and makes it so simple! It seems really helpful for worldbuilding!

[impossiblelibrary]

Marc Quinn

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[impossiblelibrary]

The cognitive dissonance and the idea of a backstory where the character has finally found some stability in their life, just for the story itself to create more instability all over again, those ideas I need to use for this one story for Dream Eater. I love descent into madness stories, and I feel like that aligns with the cryptid I'm creating, the overwhelming idea being too much for the logical mind to figure out.

I have this one character where the events are weird but it's just not hitting. And I barely have a backstory for them, so maybe it's the movement of the character that can be more complex. She goes from just wanting to put her head down to finding out she has magic powers, movement into reluctant hero. But so reluctant she wants the powers taken away by the Dream Eater. But it's kind of matter of fact in tone, instead of horror right now.

[impossiblelibrary]

for some reason, "you can just do an art project" unlocked a realization that "you can just make art" wasn't able to access.

like yeah i know i can set aside an afternoon and sketch a still life.

but also i can, like. select a random marine creature from a hat and then research them and then spend a bit of time in the evenings and weekends over the course of a few weeks making a diorama.

or i can make an abstract sculpture out of scrap cardboard and masking tape, and then paper mache over it, and then paint it.

or i can draw something with markers and color it in with crayons.

i dunno why it took me so long to realize that, in the same way that i can revisit the games and hobbies that i enjoyed as a kid, and i can orchestrate "presentation parties" so my friends and i can flex our slideshow animation skills, i can also Make Art, Grade School Style (and not just Grownup Art/School Style)

[impossiblelibrary]

08.05.2025 [😆]

📓: 다시 서평 쓰기/ The day I wrote a book review again