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That Mood™
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JAVELIN is out today. Thank you for listening. I love you.
This album is dedicated to the light of my life, my beloved partner and best friend Evans Richardson, who passed away in April. He was an absolute gem of a person, full of life, love, laughter, curiosity, integrity, and joy. He was one of those rare and beautiful ones you find only once in a lifetime—precious, impeccable, and absolutely exceptional in every way.
I know relationships can be very difficult sometimes, but it’s always worth it to put in the hard work and care for the ones you love, especially the beautiful ones, who are few and far between. If you happen to find that kind of love, hold it close, hold it tight, savor it, tend to it, and give it everything you’ve got, especially in times of trouble. Be kind, be strong, be patient, be forgiving, be vigorous, be wise, and be yourself. Live every day as if it is your last, with fullness and grace, with reverence and love, with gratitude and joy. This is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it.
Thank you. I love you. XOS
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Tw CSA, graphic
the way I miss the scent of his cologne and his musk. The way he told me I was so good at what I was doing and I finally felt safe like this was something that wouldn’t hurt and he was someone I could trust. The way he made me feel good when he touched me and I finally understood what the boys wanted to feel when they touched me. It was so safe, so normal except I was 5 and he was 40.
#tw csa#tw childhood sexual assault#tw csa vent#do not rb#actually borderline#personal#god I hate remembering this#what a gross nasty man
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think you look thinner today? you dont. you're pretty fat. think you're doing good, you're not. try harder, look better. if they're not worried for you..
you haven't done enough.
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1 like and I will weigh myself in the nurses office tomorrow
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God tonight more than anything has taught me I need to fucking die and get out of here. I’m a burden on everyone on a good night out. It’s not worth it. I’m a fucking waste of space and all I do is upset people. At the end of the day I’m glad the two people I love will have each other. Cause clearly I’m just fucking ruining everything. There’s nothing I have to offer but more hurt feelings and stress.
#I just need to disappear#not be thin#just die#I’m a waste of space. I hope I fucjing die#god stop hoping and start planning you useless fucking hole
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God tonight more than anything has taught me I need to fucking die and get out of here. I’m a burden on everyone on a good night out. It’s not worth it. I’m a fucking waste of space and all I do is upset people. At the end of the day I’m glad the two people I love will have each other. Cause clearly I’m just fucking ruining everything. There’s nothing I have to offer but more hurt feelings and stress.
#I just need to disappear#not be thin#just die#I’m a waste of space. I hope I fucjing die#god stop hoping and start planning you useless fucking hole
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Me: *talking about my life and things*
Everyone: the vibes are rancid right now.
#lol I want to die#I should shut up#i genuinely wish I could disappear#I have no point I just depress people and bother them with my life experiences#I need to shut up#but I never shut up#so like lol I should die#god I don’t want to be alive anymore lmao lmao lmao soooooooooooon. soon.#it’s going to be such a relief
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