incorrectfreebat - Tumblr blog

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Freddy: what's your computer password?

Billy: GandalfBilboThorinSmaugFiliKiliBardDwalinBucharest

Freddy: what kind of password is that?

Billy: it was saying i have to use 8 characters and a capital

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Mary: why are you two holding hands?

Freddy: studies show that holding hands can reduce stress.

Mary: oh, I thought you were dating or something.

Freddy: we are.

Billy: we're also really fucking stressed.

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Billy: I wonder if Freddy really likes me.

Pedro: wdym he'd literally jump off a cliff for you.

Billy: Freddy would jump off a cliff for fun.

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You can not look me in the eyes and tell me agent H and agent C haven’t dated before. Those two clearly have a love/hate relationship.

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Billy: I love you the most.

Freddy: Impossible! I love you the most.

Billy: Do you realize what this means?

Freddy: Yeah!

Billy & Freddy: [Starts fighting] One of us is a fucking liar!

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Billy: Batson.

Freddy: Freeman.

Billy: BATSON!

Freddy: FREEMAN!

Mary: Uh, what's going on?

Eugene: They are arguing about which last name they should go with when they got married.

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Pedro: So you two slept together?

Freddy: Hm. I feel like I'd remember that. Do you remember, Billy?

Billy: No.

Eugene: Double negative equals a positive. That's a yes.

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Freddy: Billy, I need a favor.

Billy: As long as I don't have to strip for you again.

Pedro: Stripping?

Mary: Again?

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Freddy: I was blessed the first time I laid my eyes upon you.

Billy: But you hated me.

Freddy: I still thought you were hot.

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Billy: You should know, i'm not used to doing this sort of thing. I'll probably end up breaking your heart.

Freddy: Oh, I wouldn't mind, Billy Batson. It would be a privilege to have my heart broken by you.

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Freddy: close your eyes, bro

Billy: uhh okay, bro

Freddy: what do you see, bro?

Billy: nothing, bro

Freddy: that's my world without you, bro

Billy: bro...

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Freddy: what do you do when you can't fall asleep? Do you like have a specific song that helps?

Billy: i punch myself in the face repeatedly until it goes dark

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Eugene: has anyone seen freebat?

Billy: i'm almost scared to ask, but... what's a freebat?

Freddy: hey! you can't give us a ship name without getting permission first!

Eugene: i didn't, Freddy. that's what i call the single brain cell you two share, but it seems to be missing at the moment

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Freddy: hey, i have two tickets for this new movie!

Billy: i'm so happy for you, you can go twice!

Freddy:

Billy:

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Eugene: so basically you say "wig" when someone says something super epic or cool

Billy: oh i see

[later]

Freddy: i've been meaning to tell you this for the longest time, but... i'm in love with you

Billy: wig

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Pedro: hey, are you okay, dude?

Freddy: yeah, well, I've been thinking about Billy a lot lately, and how he just left and stuff

Freddy: and I started wondering, maybe if I fall in love with my depression, it will leave me too

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Freddy: hey Billy, do you have a bag i can borrow?

Billy: the only bags i have are the ones under my eyes, and they're specifically design to carry the burden of my existence

Freddy: literally all you had to do was say no