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Carla: You just have to spread positive vibes to be nice! Here, watch.

Carla to Sarah: Hey, have a nice day!

Sarah: Err thanks.

Carla to Lisa: Now you try.

Lisa to Kit: Enjoy your next 24 hours!

Carla: NO!!!

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Lisa excitedly: The hand luggage inspectors held up my bin as an example to the rest of the queue on how to go through security correctly.

Lisa: This means I got a good grade in airport travel.

Carla: …

Carla: Yes Lisa, that's a completely normal thing to strive for and obtain.

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Carla: I will now torture you.

Lisa: Kinky.

Carla: I think you are pretty and sweet.

Lisa: …Wait.

Carla: You deserve to be cared for as much as you care for others.

Lisa: N-no!

Carla: Your feelings and needs are valid and deserve to be heard.

Lisa: I need a safe word!

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Shop assistant: Would a “Carla Connor” please come to the front desk?

Carla, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?

Shop assistant, pointing to Betsy and Ryan: I believe they belong to you?

Betsy and Ryan, simultaneously: We got lost.

Carla: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me—

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Carla: *Puts salt in coffee*

Carla: *Gives it to Lisa*

Lisa: *Sips coffee*

Carla: ....

Lisa: *Finishes coffee*

Carla: ...Didn't the coffee taste weird?

Lisa: Yeah, but I didn't want to hurt your feelings so I drank it all.

Carla, tearing up: Okay.

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Carla: Lisa… I have a kind of big question for you…

Lisa: Finally! You’re proposing!

Carla: How’d you know?

Lisa: You’ve dropped the ring five times since the start of our date.

Carla: …

Lisa: And I even handed it back to you once.

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Carla: Was that weird earlier? When I told everyone I liked girls. Was that too touchy-feely?

Ryan: Carla, no. It was great. And don't worry, just because you opened up a little doesn't mean everyone's gonna be any less afraid of you.

Ryan: We're all still terrified.

Carla, genuinely touched: Thank you, Ryan.

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Ryan if he moves into Number Six

Ryan: This is no longer Swarla's Dreamhouse. This shall henceforth be known as Ryan's Mojo Dojo Casa House!!

Carla: You don't have to say dojo and house.

Lisa: And casa...

Ryan: But you do because it feels good. Try it.

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Lisa's therapist: So, how's life, Lisa?

Lisa: Oh, you know. Chronic existential dread punctuated by moments of great fun. Can't complain.

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Carla, walking into the flat: Why does it look like a tornado came through here?

Ryan: You know that trick people play on dogs? That one when you pretend to throw a ball but actually keep it in your hand and watch as the dog chases after nothing?

Carla: Yeah?

Ryan: Lisa did that to Betsy.

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Carla: It's pretty cold outside.. wanna hold hands? We should stay close. 

Lisa, blushing: Okay. 

Betsy: It's fucking summer!

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Carla: Lisa, you need to chill. Taking time to relax is good for your health!

Lisa: But I can’t! I have so much to do; I have to do the food shop and take Betsy to court because she nicked a van and forgot she didn’t know how to drive and there’s laundry to do, your parking tickets to pay and bills to budget and-

Carla: *Shoves a kitty yawning compilation video in her face*

Lisa: Oh my gooood, kittyyyyyy!!!

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Betsy: It’ll cheer Mum up. She’ll be over the moon. She may even lean back in her chair and nod slightly!

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Carla: Pick your battles. Pick fewer battles than that. That's too many. Put some back. That's still way too many battles.

Lisa: *Frantically trying to hold on to an armload of battles, battles falling out of her pockets* NO I need ALL these battles!!

Ryan: Battles are like Pokémon. A ton matter, some evolve out of others or with help but in the end you should not carry more than 1-6.

Betsy: PICK ALL THE BATTLES. THAT'S NOT ENOUGH. CREATE A FEW MORE!!!

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Lisa to her new therapist: Yes, I have trust issues, but I earned them, okay?

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Carla: It was a really, really tough situation.

Lisa: How tough?

Carla: Well, Betsy was the voice of reason.

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Lisa: Listen kid-

Lauren: You can call me Lauren.

Lisa: I'd really rather not. If I named you, I could get attached.