DnDads sideblog for @hidefdoritos because my normal followers don't deserve this. Sons and Sonsability is taking up my whole brain and I would die for Cynthia Nixon.
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in the wake of us never getting a full 100% canon-confirmed oakworthy win, entering into a new season where Anthony is playing a teenage boy with a crush on a girl that goes to his school, Will Campos has the opportunity to do the FUNNIEST THING IMAGINABLE
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Henry is just like that guy who's become a vampire but doesn't realize it because he misattributes all his symptoms.
I just realized, if Henry doesn't get killed by something, he's going to live a really long time. Like, stupidly long.
He's a druid and at 18th Level he gets access to the class feature Timeless Body, meaning that for every 10 years that pass, his body only ages one year.
He was mid-thirties when Odyssey took place, it's like two and a half decades later and biologically, he's only now in his late thirties, maybe forty at a push. He probably looks more like Lark and Sparrow's brother than their dad.
Also I fully believe that Henry wouldn't think it was magical in nature, he would be totally convinced it was due to lifestyle choices.
Glenn - Henry, look, here's a picture of us from twenty years ago. And here's a picture of you I took earlier today. Side by side, look, you look exactly the same.
Henry - Well, would you look at that? Gee, it looks like wearing all that sunscreen is really paying off!
Ron - Okay but you're sixty and your hair isn't even thinning.
Henry - Huh, I guess you're right. That's probably the all natural shampoo that Mercedes makes - she puts rosemary oil in it, she thinks it smells nice, but it's also supposed to be good for hair follicles. I guess it's working?
Darryl - Henry, everyone else your age has creaky knees and back problems and groans when they get up out of a chair!
Henry - Ah, yes, but you're forgetting I do yoga every day, so, that keeps me limber.
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It’s okay to do things to help you even if they seem silly.
Today I read about “door pants”. Leaving a pair of pants by the door in case someone shows up. I think it was meant as a joke but thinking about it, it actually would help me.
I’ve missed important deliveries and people showing up because I don’t wear pants in the house. When I’m home, the sensation bothers me too much. But when people show up at the door, I panic and avoid the door because I’m not sure how to fix the problem of no pants. Them being in a drawer in my room and having to pick them out just makes me freeze.
So, long story short, I now have a pair of door pants. Something that seems silly that will really help me. And I’m so proud of that.
Do the things that help you. No matter how silly they may seem.
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More bad DNDADS theories! (Part 1)
Terry makes those ‘POV you’re the villain’ YouTube videos
Glenn carries catnip on him in case he decides to smoke and there’s a cat about
Rebecca believes in the cleansing power of fire
Ron was eaten by coconut crabs
Marco is into synchronised swimming
Jodie oil paints, and burns every painting no matter how good
Mercedes didn’t take Henry’s name, oak is just her middle name
Samantha is in an old skool hip hop revival group
Glenn is really good at 5d chess with multiversal time travel but cannot play regular chess
Darryl likes dragonball evolution
Mae Hails can knit but not crochet and it drives her insane
Willy can’t reverse bay park
Bill’s favourite show is bay watch
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im extremely neurotypical so heres a list of some of the dungeons and daddies (+ bonus content) lines that have plagued my mind for fucking Months now
-"paeden slits glenns achilles tendant"
-matt having cynthia yell "HOWDY" at THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND
-anthony, as fictional beth: "im everybodys favourite!"
-every single "eye of the tiger BA-BEYY"
-"goblin' these NUTS"
-"i think im going to become a farmer"
-just. the entire hyper-intelligent whale bit
-"my name is lincoln" "oh what a coincidence"
-every time anthony says anything along the lines of "hermie turns around and hes already-"
-"i think gurdy just dies from natural causes"
-the scam likely ringtone, of course
-(in the first ever scene taylor appears in): "mom, whos my dad"
-"the vending machine looks smaller up close than it does from a distance. or well i guess thats just how perspective works,"
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I can excuse anything Lark does because he was crushed by a pyramid one time and personally if I was crushed by a pyramid one time I’d be a little fucked up too
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Hermie the Unworthy would study K.P. Hobs like a bug under a magnifying glass.
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Calling my shot. If Terry dies I bet he gets hit on the head with a falling Link from the human gun
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I had a food order at work today for a Nicholas and a Taylor. Almost passed out right at my station.
#Nick and Taylor Get Burritos#that's it that's the fanfic#lives in my brain rent free#dndads s2#dndads#dungeons and daddies#taylor swift dndads#demon nick
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Relistening to the Oakvale arc and I miss Glenn Close putting The Most Unhinged Plan together right under Anthony's nose. Freddie refusing to answer any questions about it is amazing.
Also, the little bird Glenn talks to is named Little Caesar?? Wonder if there's a tie to the current pizza arc....
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in case you ever wanted to know what mambo number 5 sounds like with all the instruments (including the drums) replaced with bike horns
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in case you ever wanted to know what mambo number 5 sounds like with all the instruments (including the drums) replaced with bike horns
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I'm here reading the transcript of the first episode of dndads and I think it's really funny that in both the latest episode (s2e18) and this first one it just Matt and Freddie fighting over Freddie's phone
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We all know Normal won't take the shower. I'd put money on everything else though.

got bored and made a bingo card for the rest of the season. most of them will probably happen, and some of them are so wild i would be shocked if it happens
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Okay I am running low on blogs to follow. My dash is dead. Reblog this if you post (including reblogs):
Bbc merlin (but only if you like the show unironically. No shade to those of you who think it’s bad but enjoy it anyway, but I just don’t vibe with ironic enjoyment.)
Dungeons and Dragons (including liveplay shows)
Avatar the Last Airbender
The Witcher
Doctor Who
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every time I start thinking less radically (trash like "maybe Queen Lizzie wasn't THAT responsible for colonialism because she inherited it and she was dismissed as a woman in power) I realize that Rebecca Oak-Swallows-Garcia would agree with me, and THAT'S what keeps me tethered to radicalism.
#I'm still unlearning so much conservative brainrot#but picturing her smug face#as the smiling middle ground between Selfish Cruelty and Altruistic Surviving#and realizing that I could be her??#BONE-CHILLING.#no thank you#I will stay a punk.#dndads#dndads s2#rebecca oak swallows garcia
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