jedibookworm

[jedibookworm]

Apparently me just “casually” reading fanfic translates to reading over a full book’s worth. And just... not thinking anything of it. Help. Me.

[jedibookworm]

The “Gifted” Kids of AoT (Modern AU)

Mikasa: 

- Knows what’s going on, but doesn’t give a fuck about anything

- Stays in the easier classes to be with Eren

- A’s to A+’s on every assignment

- Everyone knows she’s smart, but isn’t the shining beacon of genius in their eyes

- Burnt out but doesn’t really show it due to extreme denial of feelings in general

Armin:

- Knows EVERYTHING and loves school

- But will sometimes read manga during class

- Always gets away with it because his grades are good enough

- Still has a spark of life and love of learning??????? How????????

- Will tutor other students for fun

Levi:

- The personification of burnout

- Hates fucking everything about school, the work, the kids, the random bullshit, everything

- Regularly skips class cause he can’t handle the stupidity of his classmates. Even though he’s only in advanced classes

- Only really shows up for tests and aces them

- IF he actually does work, only gets 100%+

- But has average or poor grades in most classes cause he never does the trivial, busy work bullshit

- Used to love learning, but has become extremely disillusioned by the school system

Erwin:

- Knows more than the teacher and is the model student

- Participates, studies, and actually tries

- Probably the head of a million clubs

- Has a one sided rivalry with Levi and is so annoyed by how he skates by without knowing shit

[jedibookworm]

My body 24/7: When sleep but also NEVER SLEEP EVER

Me, sobbing: I’m so tired but no rest why

my body, tearfully: when sleep???

me: my dude we just woke up!! It’s time for wakefulness and doing things and Productivity

my body, weeping: but???? when sleep?????

[jedibookworm]

What Your Favorite Fanfiction Trope Says About You

Found family: You’re gay, but on top of that, either your parents only value your achievements yet criticize them, hate you, or both at the same time. You also need therapy

Enemies to Lovers: You live for that sexual tension and that scene where they confess their feelings in the middle of a heated argument. You’ve also had numerous crushes, but remain single to this day with a short relationship here and there

Friends to Lovers: You either like fluff, are gay, or both. You’re the friend that gives couple therapy to your friend group which boils down to just communicating to the other

Mafia: Horny 24/7, but with style. Loves plot. Also, every person you’ve crushed on is a hot goth

ABO: Horny 26/8 and not ashamed. At least on the inside. People either know you’re a horny fuck or think you’re a small innocent bean. Would kill yourself or laugh manically (or both??) if fanfic history were to be revealed

Fluff: Wholesome. You are the epitome of wholesomeness and probably order coffee so diluted with sugar and cream it may as well be a dessert

Angst: Severe emotional trauma one way or another. Probably a once gifted kid, but either way you’re most likely failing most classes. You feed yourself pain to feel something again and drown in it as a twisted way of escapism. Only leaves you feeling more empty than before, but the temporary high is addicting

Hanahaki: Struggles with self esteem and wish someone would find you worthy enough to die over. A hopeless romantic, too

Soulmate AU: A hopeless romantic yet again, but makes hanahaki lover look as if they’re smoking weed instead of crack, like you. You feel alone and on the occasion someone does love you, you feel as if they’re making a huge mistake and wasting their time, love, and effort on you. You know they’ll break up with you, but cling so desperately to every scrap of love anyone throws your way all while refusing it

Hurt/comfort: Trust issues. Huge ones. You deal with severe pain one way or another and long for someone to care, but are too scared to let anyone see your vulnerable side. You also believe your pain isn’t as bad as others and wish it was worse so you can feel validated

[jedibookworm]

Let’s see... an entire wall of fanart that I’ve created myself, a bag of stale animal crackers, and all the Percy Jackson books

rb with some red flags that are in your room

[jedibookworm]

AoT Characters and Fall/Autumn

Eren:

- Rages against anything pumpkin spice

- Refuses to wear long sleeved clothes

- Will never admit to being cold

Mikasa:

- Glad she doesn’t have to explain the scarf

- Loves being able to bundle up

- Also adores pumpkin spice

- Her favorite season

Armin:

- Sweaters

- You thought he was a nerd, well now he can look the part even more so now

- Likes it cause it’s when school and college begins?????

- Loves the overall smell of fall but can never describe it

Levi:

- “Looks like it’s time for seasonal depression on top of the usual. Well fuck me I guess”

- *proceeds to take long sip of tea and go back to reading a book*

- Bundles up even more than usual

- The poor man looks like a walking marshmallow being suffocated with a scarf due to his puffy coat

- Also hates pumpkin spice with a passion

Jean:

- Will get into fights about pumpkin spice

- Has never even tried it, just likes to fight

- Will wear long sleeves, but pants instead of shorts? No way

- He will stick by to his shorts policy even if threatened with frostbite

Connie:

- Makes fun of Eren and Jean by wearing only shorts and short sleaved shirts

- Complains about being cold the entire time in a shrill, whiny voice

Sasha:

- Cuddles up in bundles of blankets while stuffing her face and binge watching series

- LOVES pumpkin spice

- Calls fall Halloween season

Hange:

- Knows exactly when it’s fall because of the equinox and going out to do rituals at that exact time

- Has dragged Levi to them every year

- Sees how many pumpkin spice lattes she can guzzle in two minutes

- Dresses up in costumes every single day cause every day is Halloween now

- Decorates entire house with Halloween decorations

- But all her lawn decorations face the house????

- Pumpkin carving extraordinaire

Erwin:

- Mr. “Let’s use this season to improve ourselves and search for new opportunities and experiences” Smith

- Has a fall color section of his wardrobe so that he can look seasonally appropriate and sharp

- Lectures his students about the misconceptions and origins of Halloween every time it is brought up

- Hates pumpkins

[jedibookworm]

Sorry for not posting for awhile. I haven’t been doing well and have had no energy to create new content. I hope you all are doing well, but just in case anyone is wondering what happened to my account (highly doubt such), I just wanted you all to know <3

[jedibookworm]

Attack on Titan Incorrect Quotes: Texting AU

Reiner: So it turns out the increased minor panic attacks were actually heart problems lmao. Hospital here I come

*Several people are typing*

[jedibookworm]

On an unrelated note, I'm back in the ER. Hence all my jokes about medical stuff lately. Really hope this doesnt last hours like last time. Stay healthy everyone and drink water!

[jedibookworm]

Attack on Titan Incorrect: Texting AU

Hange: Sooooo... is chest pain and difficulty of breathing cause for concern or should I just walk it off

Hange: low key feel like I’m going to faint tho

Levi: idk. Sounds pretty normal to me

Connie: Bro.... I don’t know how to tell you this, but-

Eren: I think you guys need help

Connie: That is not normal. Go to the ER

Levi: This isn’t a normal state of being?

Reiner: That’s exactly what I told my therapist after she said having suicidal thoughts every day wasn’t healthy lmao

Erwin: Stay where you are. I’m taking you all to the hospital

[jedibookworm]

Incorrect AoT Quotes: Group Texting AU

Hange: Is 1aM, I’ve deunk fibe ciops of coggee amd i cn scee inyo the nxt dimrnsin (Translation: It’s 1am and I’ve drunk five cups of coffee and can see into the next dimension)

Connie: How can I even read this?????

Levi: Why the fuck are there so many typos and go to bed before I make you

Hange: sats tge ome syill up (says the one still up)

Hange: bUt tje shajimg is mskung it hatd to tupe (but the shaking is making it hard to type)

Levi: I have insomnia. Now go to bed four eyes

Eren: Connie, I need the Hange translation. I have no idea what they’re saying

Hange: Nooooooooooooooooooo. Siense calls (Science calls)

*ten minutes later*

Hange: simrones at me doir. Kifnapper fir sire. Tou lste (someone’s at the door. Kidnapper for sure. Too late)

*five minutes later and several people are typing*

Hange: *sends photo of her and Levi*

[jedibookworm]

Just found out my older brother and I have been pretending we haven’t watched and loved Attack on Titan for months because we’re scared of what the other would think since we have an overly strict family... I-

This is what a toxic family will do to you, kids. Be good parents when you grow up so your kids don’t create a system thats’ secrecy and deception could impress the mafia itself. 

[jedibookworm]

Reasons Why AoT Characters Were Rushed to the ER

Eren:

- Dude got into a fight AGAIN

- And not only did he lose, but he got at least one broken bone on top of the shame

- Told the doctor he ran into a pole

- When questioned how he broke something and had multiple cuts and bruises, he said him running into poles was a repeating incident

. . .

Mikasa:

- Never seriously got hurt, but delivered Eren there

- Makes sure he gets the best treatment

- The only one to back him up when he said he ran into a pole 27 times

. . .

Armin:

- Got beat up by bullies

- It honestly wasn’t that bad, but was made to go because Eren insisted

- Or more like Eren tried to beat up the bullies only to get hurt worse and it was a group trip to the ER

- Actually keeps his head

- Knows his and Eren’s medical history like the back of his hand

- Makes up a more believable story for Eren cause there is no way they’re gonna buy the same story every time if they ever did in the first place

. . .

Jean:

- Got into a fight either with Eren or defending Eren cause ONLY HE CAN BEAT HIM UP

- Exaggerated all his injuries

- Regularly brags about his injuries

. . .

Connie:

- No one ever knows why he ended up there

- But everyone gets a minute by minute update on his experience there cause he uploads pictures with captions to every one of his social media accounts

- Love to take selfies with the peace sign and a grin

- Has run someone over with the wheelchair he was given to roll around in

. . .

Sasha:

- Got her hand stuck in a blender

- How you may ask? She forgot to turn it off when cleaning it and oop-

- Shows everyone her stitches

. . .

Levi:

- Walked into a checkup for depression meds looking like exhaustion in the flesh, causing his doctor great concern

- Also had something wrong with his heart??? But like an irregular beat or something

- Honestly, he was rushed to the ER 75% cause of his heart and 25% because no one that exhausted looking should even be alive

- Chilled in the hospital the entire time and just scrolled through his phone

- Gave zero fucks

- If anyone had seen him there, they’d have thought it was his second home

- However, he detested the wheelchair they forced him to use

. . .

Hange:

- Science experiment fiasco

- Loved the entire checkup and asked a million questions about what they were doing to her and why

- Literally asked if they could draw her blood so she could see it coming out of her

- Probably found snooping through all the drawers in the hospital room

. . .

Erwin:

- The poor doctor having to deal with everyone

- Love his job but is just so tired of it

- Did not buy Eren’s story at all

- Is suspicious of Armin cause something seemed... off

- Has learnt to put locks on all the drawers in case Hange ever shows up there again

[jedibookworm]

AoT Incorrect Quotes

Erwin: May the Fourth be with you!

Levi: And may you live long and prosper🖖

Hange: *unintelligible screeching in fury*

[jedibookworm]

Incorrect AoT quotes

Levi: I’m not saying I’m tired or anything, but I’m also saying that the last time I slept I dreamt that I was so tired I kept nodding off and taking naps against my will

[jedibookworm]

AoT Incorrect Quotes

Reiner: My brain keeps telling me to kill myself. Like seriously? I’ve already done enough for five lifetimes already and now I’ve gotta delete myself too? No way. Work towards your goals without crying to me to do everything. You know I’ve carried every group project on my back so you’ve got to step up and do it yourself for once. 

[jedibookworm]

AoT Characters in an Art Class

Eren:

- Only there because it’s a requirement

- Lots and lots of stick figures

- Eventually figures out he’s half decent at abstract art

- If everything goes well, it could actually turn out to be a way to vent and calm himself down

. . .

Mikasa:

- Only went when Eren finally did

- Can somehow draw beautifully????

- Art prodigy

- Excels at drawing plants and people

- Though she normally likes to draw flowers, which show a completely different side to her

- Cannot draw animals for her life

. . .

Armin: 

- Knows *how* to draw, but when pencil hits the paper, he has a hard time applying everything

- Pretty decent actually. Neither good nor bad

- Loves to draw scenery, but people? Completely different story

- Has cried while attempting to draw a hand before

. . .

Levi:

- Calls everything he makes trash

- Sometimes he just loses his soul and will to live in the middle of a drawing and just glares at it for half an hour straight, willing it to fix itself

- Has excused himself to the bathroom before, only to be found by the janitor screaming and cussing out a paintbrush

- Actually does well, though?

- His art always ends up in the hallways on display?

- Has been told he has a great and unique art style (has no idea that was even a thing until he was told, though)

. . .

Jean:

- Has squirted paint on Eren before

- Not so much a painter or draw... er... but great at sculptures

- If anyone ruins or lays so much as a finger on his art they will be murdered

- Doesn’t allow people to breathe three feet of his pieces

. . .

Connie:

- That one kid who can’t make art for his life

- Tried at the beginning, figured out he couldn’t, and then sold all his art supplies

- Mostly uses class to goof off

- Mainly finger paints, even if what they’re doing has nothing to do with paint

. . .

Sasha:

- Taste tester of art materials

- Had to transfer so she couldn’t poison herself

- But her studies have shown that blue paint does indeed taste better than red

. . .

Hange:

- An abstract genius

- Colors are her thing and she can mess around with them for hours

- LOVES splatter art

- Has named one of her abstract pieces “The Screams of Anxiety”

- Has been nicknamed anti Bob Ross due to the chaotic energy she oozes

. . .

Erwin:

- Can only attempt realism

- Cannot even seem to fathom attempting something that doesn’t look realistic

- Uses 5,000 reference photos

- Cries in the bathroom after each art class because why can’t he art correctly??

- Turns right back around and talks about how art is a learning process and that its value isn’t in how perfect itis but instead what the artist is trying to portray