jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback

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There’s a feral clown in my backyard, and it looks hurt. I’ve never taken care of one before but living in bumfuck nowhere doesn’t give me much of a choice. The closest exotic vet is literally a whole 3 days drive and I’m not about to do that for a small scrape. Not sure on the species, will update later.

[jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback]

My friend just said my dog looks so un-stealable after I sent her a sort of ugly picture of him??

[jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback]

Big poly relationships sound so fun like imagine being able to go shopping w all your lovely buddies all the time at once, and how easy chores would be to split up!!!

Mad at a partner? Just hang out with another one, duh. Give it some space before you come back, then smooch their face.

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The first tweet is just the entire joke catalogue of Paradise PD

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I could finish my essay due in three days, or I could rewatch Nathan for You again.

My will is weak lads.

[jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback]

Gott a popped corb kernel stufkz betweens mmy teefh ehrm my lihfe is obver

[jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback]

India has bootleg Bigfoot but on rollar blades

[jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback]

Who up playing with they primordial ooze

[jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback]

First post since remembering my login… a lot has changed. For one, I’m a slut now.

[jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback]

fun fact: the producer for the Scooby-Doo movies is named Dick Suckle

[jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback]

He’s Starting To Suspect Something’s Not Right

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Please. Please please please read this and reblog!

If you support LGBTQ Rights you need to stop scrolling and read this. This is not a fucking joke.

If you cant read this, here it is: 

If you don’t remember Sophie M Herold, she is a German girl, who is extremely homophobic and transphobic. She has found out LGBTQ persons names, addresses, personal info etc. And set up her own database. Her intentions with this are harmful.

She is sending out this information, your information, your best friends information, someone you love and care about. She’s sending it to hate groups, malicious people, people with bad intentions. And if you think I’m blowing this out of proportion, people have been kicked out of homes, disowned by families and even MURDERED. Yes, murdered. Innocent people who have done nothing but love. She has had numerous blogs and each have been removed. Tumblr staff are aware of her, and as far as I’m aware she currently doesn’t have a blog, but this does not mean she isn’t still on peoples tumblrs, asking via anon where you live, what your name is. An email I received today. She’s sending out information of same sex couples with children so the children can be kidnapped. She entitled it “Time to strike back”. If that doesn’t suggest harmful intentions I don’t know what does. Please be extremely careful what you post on tumblr, on twitter, facebook, anywhere. Do NOT give out your full name or your address, or even the town in which you live. Look out for one another, and don’t answer any suspicious anons. Especially if they use your name in quotation marks. Sophie M Herold is still out there, she always will be, so please spead this message and warn people. She’s attacking in silence. We don’t need more people dying because of her actions.========This disgusting excuse of a human being of needs to stop, but the only way it can be stopped is if you spread this! Please, be aware of any suspicious people or anons asking for personal information. It can get you or your loved ones in SERIOUS DANGER. Thank you.

[jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback]

The life of a wattpad user.

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Scientists can't tell the difference nor can I.

[jessetwinkmanfrombreakingback]

Why does my pencil box look like a blobfish?